What Happens When An Addicted Loved One Refuses Treatment

  Рет қаралды 7,781

Put The Shovel Down

Put The Shovel Down

Күн бұрын

We tackle the essential steps to take to encourage your addicted family member to seek professional help, ranging from fostering open communication to researching suitable addiction treatment options. Discover proven strategies that have helped others break through the barriers of denial and begin their path to recovery.
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Пікірлер: 44
@cathie1234
@cathie1234 11 ай бұрын
I told my son that I love him dearly and when he wants help I’ll be glad to help him get there. He doesn’t live with me but there’s so many unknowns. He so secretive. No ultimatum. Still painful.
@rythmjunky5292
@rythmjunky5292 11 ай бұрын
Just found your channel. My partner of 13 years refuses to admit he has a problem with alcohol. I should have left years ago,but I kept hoping. He’s a master at stringing me along with the carrot on the stick. I’m exhausted and don’t sleep. I need to leave but I’m isolated from friends and family and have no support network to rely on. I keep setting my resolve and freezing. I can’t stand to be around him anymore,and cringe when he tries to touch me(there’s been major boundary violations over the years). I know I need help,too. But don’t even know where to start. I grew up with an alcoholic parent,and I’m embarrassed to admit I didn’t recognize the signs of him being an addict until recently. I have my own issues,too,obviously. I’m glad I found your channel. It’s the first glimpse of hope I’ve had in a long,long time. Now to figure out how to get myself out of here.
@PutTheShovelDown
@PutTheShovelDown 11 ай бұрын
Sorry you're going through all that, but I'm glad you're here. Welcome to our little community.
@LisaGoncalves-cb9te
@LisaGoncalves-cb9te 8 ай бұрын
Hi. 12 years married to an alcoholic here. I feel you. I am done but cannot leave as we he is the bread winner and we have children. I don't earn enough to leave and have nowhere to go. It is so heart wrenching. I also dont sleep. It is so exhausting. Sending love and understanding. We are not alone.
@polarbearsrus6980
@polarbearsrus6980 7 ай бұрын
Only one person can make your life better and it's not your partner. You may have very low self esteem. Please seek counseling. You deserve a better life.🤔
@marygibbons2263
@marygibbons2263 11 күн бұрын
A support group such as al anon is very helpful. They have literature that helps in learning to deal with the effects of a loved ones addiction. Wishing you peace and recovery
@righteousmonkey
@righteousmonkey 11 ай бұрын
Amber, you're dropping mega gems (as always). As an addict in recovery I can relate to everything you've said. It's amazing the things you know about us. I feel so vulnerable right now. Lol! jk. Keep on doing what you're doing because you're truly making a difference. I hope people listen to this more than once because there's so much truth being spoken. 🙏
@PutTheShovelDown
@PutTheShovelDown 11 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for the positive feedback. I feel so validated!!!! 😁😁😁😁😁
@righteousmonkey
@righteousmonkey 11 ай бұрын
@@PutTheShovelDown You’re official! Ha haa! 🥇
@jennyvanderhoff2663
@jennyvanderhoff2663 11 ай бұрын
After he flatly denied addiction, lost his job and was also on Xanax as well as alcohol- I locked him up in ‘my own’ rehab. He’s sober a year later, hates me and we’re getting divorced.
@maydonegan2372
@maydonegan2372 11 ай бұрын
This is almost exactly what happened to me
@sharonb.7867
@sharonb.7867 11 ай бұрын
I am so sorry. . .my heart hurts for you ❤😢!
@roberjordal00
@roberjordal00 10 ай бұрын
💔
@BeegirlsHoneyHouse
@BeegirlsHoneyHouse 8 ай бұрын
Natural consequences aren’t beautiful to behold… Power and peace to you.🌎🫶🏼🕊
@polarbearsrus6980
@polarbearsrus6980 7 ай бұрын
Good, you deserve better.
@annmelanie1513
@annmelanie1513 11 ай бұрын
My son had agreed to help. Upon checking he said he was doing it for family not himself. They refused him because of that
@PutTheShovelDown
@PutTheShovelDown 11 ай бұрын
😮😫
@allisonb.8492
@allisonb.8492 11 ай бұрын
YESSSS AMBER. 100% ITS THE CHAOSSS!
@irisscreativehints3899
@irisscreativehints3899 11 ай бұрын
He is very proud and I think that is the problem. I now believe that he just can’t do it. He tells me he hates his life. I’m so afraid of suicidal
@bananabep
@bananabep 11 ай бұрын
Thanks to so many counselors who tell parents to put their child on the streets because he/ she has to go rock bottom.
@judisamoisette1258
@judisamoisette1258 11 ай бұрын
It works , allow them how to figure it out
@ninajustiniano9055
@ninajustiniano9055 11 ай бұрын
My son in law is a nasty alcoholic, verbally abuse, DWI, I cut him off, I'm done
@oodleyboo
@oodleyboo 11 ай бұрын
Hi Amber, I'm so grateful for your videos❤️ Thank You. My 25yo son agreed to go to a treatment facility. After one week, he wanted to come home. Definitely a long time before the program complete. Of course they had to let him go, and he came home and relapsed heavily within a few months. What choice do we as parents have in this situation?
@polarbearsrus6980
@polarbearsrus6980 7 ай бұрын
You have to make him get out of your home. Why would he change if you allow him to continue to make you miserable?Are you enabling his behavior? Just a thought...
@irisscreativehints3899
@irisscreativehints3899 11 ай бұрын
My 46 year old son has been living with me for 13 years with this addiction of drugs . I have try so many times to help him. He’s been living in a trailer outside of my home in the driveway. He has made an effort and has gone to inpatient rehabilitation. It has not worked. We don’t have the money to send him to a good place cause the insurance, he’s on husky. The places that took him were just terrible!! I love him because I know he’s a good person but I just can’t take the stress n his paranoia when he is high. I don’t want to evict him but I have no choice
@PutTheShovelDown
@PutTheShovelDown 11 ай бұрын
There comes a time when you have to take care of yourself.
@polarbearsrus6980
@polarbearsrus6980 7 ай бұрын
DO it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It might be the thing that wakes him up. You have to take care of yourself. Good luck.🤒
@louisemartin5378
@louisemartin5378 11 ай бұрын
What about if you asked them to leave before you found out about the addiction? - I put up with verbal, financial and emotional abuse for years and decided no more for the kids and I - only to find out later that meth was the reason behind the major character/behaviour changes ? We have very limited communication now
@PutTheShovelDown
@PutTheShovelDown 11 ай бұрын
You should never put up with abuse, no matter if there is an addiction or not.
@louisemartin5378
@louisemartin5378 11 ай бұрын
@@PutTheShovelDown I know - I’m am working with a counsellor to get my self value back - but as far as the marriage almost 20 years it’s destroyed by lies deception cheating and manipulation- what do I do from this point
@trollsnotwelcome7805
@trollsnotwelcome7805 11 ай бұрын
But they will reply that they don't know what you are talking about? That it's you who is the problem, just leave them alone and all would be fine.
@JAMN2GD
@JAMN2GD 11 ай бұрын
Oh Gosh Beth. Of course not. They will say anything you want them to say. Just to make you feel better. Honest and transparency. Oh lord. Unfortunately you will hear that for years until truly they are ready to stop. You will never be told the truth. They will be intoxicated and lie to your face. I feel you can give up on that one.
@stephaniesmith5974
@stephaniesmith5974 11 ай бұрын
Thanks!
@PutTheShovelDown
@PutTheShovelDown 11 ай бұрын
Wow! Thank you so much, Stephanie! 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
@Saddling
@Saddling 10 ай бұрын
I relapsed after 30 days of rehab for my bulimic food addiction and my parents are so pissed but they and I are at loss for what should be done next. As soon as I wake up I want to do it I can’t even think about anything else and nothing else makes me happy. I hate my mind.
@sarommean2138
@sarommean2138 5 ай бұрын
I cant have them in my house because im an addict myself and they are risking my sobriety, so what should i do?
@bananabep
@bananabep 11 ай бұрын
Sometimes they don't even go through fases of trying to control it at all.
@annmelanie1513
@annmelanie1513 11 ай бұрын
Fenbendazole for pet cancer
@user-qk5vg7zr5j
@user-qk5vg7zr5j 11 ай бұрын
i love ur videos, u are so dead on. BUT what if u have tried all that stuff and its to the point where they are too strung out on fentanyl and meth that they dont care about anything at all, they take advantage and everything ends up a revolving cycle and at this point hes gonna od if i leave him completely alone since ive made him leave because it was out of haND AND I REFUSE TO HAVE FENTANYL IN MY HOME WITH MY KIDS AND BABIES? oops caps
@PutTheShovelDown
@PutTheShovelDown 11 ай бұрын
Once it gets to that point, you have to protect yourself and your kids!
@dilmohmad-vu4rv
@dilmohmad-vu4rv 11 ай бұрын
Ilovemyfriend
@melanielutchman9484
@melanielutchman9484 11 ай бұрын
I've tried everything for 7 years. The only thing that's left is for me to do is be locked up in a cage where he has me all the time that's when he is the happiest
@PutTheShovelDown
@PutTheShovelDown 11 ай бұрын
Even though I talk about what's best for the addicted person in these videos, that doesn't mean I'm saying you should stay in a bad situation. Please take care of yourself.
@polarbearsrus6980
@polarbearsrus6980 7 ай бұрын
@@PutTheShovelDown I think you need to focus more on that exact point.
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