What Is A Spoonie? // The Spoon Theory

[@meganluck9132]

You have a very expressive face and it is easy to watch you talk. I am hard of hearing, 70% deaf in left ear, 80% deaf in right ear and I have not very good at lip reading. I use ASL and watch body language and facial expressions to help keep up with conversations. Your videos are very enjoyable.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

+Megan Luck so glad you like my videos and they make sense to you. I'm working hard on getting all of my videos to have captions so hopefully soon you can enjoy all of them! 😊

[@sd-cy2cl]

I think you could consider yourself deaf, if you’d like 💕 hard of hearing makes it sound as tho it is not something that impacts your day to day life the way I’m assuming it does. “Deaf” does not mean “cannot hear a single thing everything is white noise”. the word may help others bette understand and help you if need be💕💕 but it’s completely up to you of c

[@satanicsycophant1501]

Megan Luck i have ads this is also helpful

[@katlynbrown3548]

I have major depressive disorder and the spoon theory describes my energy. Like just getting out of bed requires so much from me and then to go shopping or to a family event takes like 2 or 3 spoons. and it sucks because sometimes my mom asks if I wanna do something with the family over the weekend but I say no because I know by that day I wont have energy to go, I wont want to get dressed and leave the house, etc.

[@leticia9281]

katlyn brown Yes, this theory is perfect to describe depression. Most people CAN’T acknowledge it as a disabling illness because it’s “invisible”. I feel like sometimes waking up and having a invisible wall in front of me. So everything I try to do, I have to push this wall. Sometimes this wall is lighter, so I can push it to do stuff like brushing my teeth, taking a bath and getting out of home. But sometimes it’s real heavy. So I do a few things and get exhausted. It’s impossible to push any further.

[@KosmaThePigeon]

I feel like it fits really. At least i can describe better why i cant do anything besides go to work, be there, go back home and then just rest for a weekend. (Also why i sometimes just cant take care of my hygiene.)

[@alexanderstenbeck9156]

Yes I feel I was gonna comment that I feel like I have less spoons then the normal person and I come home from school or work and just crash even though I have so much I need to do it feels like I have to be like one or two things today and the rest can wait because you cannot do that. I have anxiety and slight depression

[@alexanderstenbeck9156]

Or when I end up being way to drained to go to school cause I’ve been going for five days a week for like a month and I can’t take it and then miss a day just to recharge so I have to make up an excuse or My body genuinely creates an excuse it’s stupid

[@slytherin_killjoy]

Yes, definitely! I have depression too, and I'm basically constantly about to crash because I just have so little energy

[@Mandrake_root]

I don't have an energy related disability, but I do use the spoonie theory sometimes. With my ADHD I see the amount of controllable focus I have as my spoons. Medication, positive reinforcement, good sleep, and atmosphere can increase my spoons or make them last longer. Also having to force myself to focus on things when I've run out of focus spoons then it drains my energy very quickly. It's like w/out medication have 7 normal focus spoons and 3 backup spoons that drain my energy. On medication I have 15-20 normal focus spoons and like 1.5 backup energy spoons (medication uses a lot of energy) When I hyperfocuses i use one spoon and makes it last like 5 or 10 spoons. It's like a Mario rainbow star powerup.

[@thespooniehandbook1208]

I have ADHD too. Lots of love and hugs.

[@mrslauramay]

I love this. Hi brain buddy! 🧠 💖 I love others with varied brains and bodies as well, and I love that we all have this adaptable shorthand. The rainbow star effect is spot on.

[@Jbatch85]

Great description with the Mario star haha. It makes me laugh and also explains it well

[@qtea3.149]

I relate to this!

[@thekiwiclipper1113]

Eat the soy and Adderall... you are so heckin valid

[@MonserratFoster]

I have to thank you for posting this. I have two disabled friends and although I feel like I often understand this helped me understand better what it's like for them.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

You're so welcome, glad my video helped x

[@LuckyPineapple]

This is wonderful to hear!! Sometimes it’s so hard to convey how exhausting just living can be to our friends and family, and just knowing that you can understand your friends situations now is awesome

[@mulliganstew72]

you are a doll and a very good friend. My friends don’t understand. Even if I’m having one of those rare days where I’m not canceling on the plan because I’m too sick, ithey want to know I’m going home “so soon”. i’m like really? There’s more? This was an enough? instead of driving away feeling like I just had a great night I drive away feeling like dejected party pooper. They don't see me sick in bed before this social activity or the 2 -3 days following that i’m slammed from debilitating symptoms because of the energy exertion. My friends are married with children, work for jobs, volunteer, play in a band,Participate in year-round Riverraft thing, and Coach sports. So to say they don't understand is an understatement LOL .

[@jennykate8610]

I know I’m really late but I have Crohn’s disease and I never knew I could use the term spoonie (I thought it was just for those with chronic fatigue syndrome) but it fits so perfectly with how I feel. It’s currently 4:30am, I finished the day on no spoons and now I can’t sleep even though I’m exhausted. I’m worried now because I have school tomorrow but I don’t know if I’ll have enough spoons to make it through. Being chronically ill is such an effort that people don’t even see. It’s very frustrating at times.

[@memayya4236]

Jenny Rose i have IBD too, I think I am not way too sick but it changes my lifestyle tremendously. I am on a new treatment that is going well and now I have more good days and I feel more like a normal person, however, I agree that being chronically ill is a significant effort even when you are feeling good, that people cant imagine how it is, and yes it frustraiting and exhausting, but maybe it is best to think that you dont owe and explanation to anyone and you do you, for your own good, fisically and mentally. Best of luck with your treatment 😊

[@samfrench4212]

Crohnie Spoonie here!! Spoon theory has been so effing helpful to explain to my college buds about how my life works, love it. I actually got chronic fatigue from my treatments for Crohn’s and gastroparesis (thanks guys)

[@jennykate8610]

Sam French it’s so useful! Keep on keeping on sista :)

[@hazydayz988]

I have UC and we are definitely spoonies! IBD is exhausting

[@jennykate8610]

Ethan Lewis I feel that! Hope you are doing okay

[@Steela100]

The issue I have is that I don't know how many spoons I start the day with... like I know that taking a shower takes energy and walking to the train station does and I know I have to sleep after work but I don't know how many things I can do before I just crash... which is a slight issue

[@laylyoldwild]

Same, and I often don't notice my spoons depleting until I'm in the negative

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Yes and yes to both of these things! I definitely don't notice I'm running out of spoons until I walk into something! I find that having people around me who can recognise the signs makes a huge difference because they can pull me back and I don't go into the red. Completely understand the waking up not knowing how many spoons you have! Do you get any warning signs the night before?

[@Rose01bloom]

Ailis f

[@atropiaveteran]

I'm definitely with you there, I have the same issue. Sometimes this can be a pain, and I have to pull over and park my car so I can take a few moments. And I dread ever being given a drunk test, I cant walk straight sober! Ugh, luckily I do* have a disabled card from the Veterans Administration that people can see for proof. Invisible injuries are the pits. Sometimes I think it would've been easier to come home with a few less limbs, but alas it wasn't how things played out.

[@solveigst-juste1126]

Same

[@blair2993]

"Guys, I washed! Give me an award." Same. Saaaaaame.

[@tobyameson3159]

As a fellow spoonie, here's an award for your gorgeous hair and the rest of your consistently amazing look! That's a lot of work, time, energy, and potentially pain. I am impressed by your effort!

[@patriciavicta845]

I really love your hair. You do deserve an award! And yes this kind of describes how I go from day to day. Sometimes I'm still baffled that people like Mary exist like she used up so few spoons. I can start the day with 30 spoons but they're just so quickly depleted. Mine's not exactly how many spoons I start with but that just I deplete them very rapidly, using multiple spoons for a simple task (though there are days I wake up with very few spoons).

[@marssmith64]

It's very saddening how relatable this explanation is to me. I cried because it's summarized a lot of my energy or should I say lack of energy problems. People who don't have a hard time staying awake ALL day, don't get post-exertional malaise, don't feel winded after only doing some dishes and nothing else, usually don't understand what it's like to be sick and have less spoons. I think this is one of the best explanations for those trying to understand themselves better and also for those who thankfully do not suffer with these issues. Edit: Changed post exercise malaise to post-exertional malaise (PEM)

[@mmilcz833]

I have clinical depression so some days I start out with 30 spoons and sometimes with literally 2. I have never thought of myself as having a disability but from that aspect I guess I do. Taking meds does stabilize the amount of energy I have in general but unfortunately there are days when no matter how much motivation I have (if I have any) I can't bring myself to leave the house or deal with another person or even washing my teeth. Maybe that doesn't justify as being disabled but I definitely understand what this is about and I relate

[@Beanjast]

I don't ever use the term spoonie to describe myself because I don't feel like i have 'enough' health issues to. My illness is treatable but permanent, and I have definitely felt better since starting treatment. I thought it was interesting however to think about how the number of spoons people have can vary from day to day! Some days I have 25 spoons, other days I have 15! And it can be really hard to know what kind of day it's going to be until you're almost out of spoons, and you suddenly NEED to nap and/or you take that accessible seat on the bus.. and let people glare at you... because you 'look fine, but you know you really need to sit down. Always hoping for a Mary day!

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Please don't ever feel like you can't use a term that might help you just because your condition is changeable- no one has the right to judge you and I'll fight them if they try to! Granted, I probably won't be great in said fight but I'll give it a bloody good try...! You stay strong and use whatever assistance you need to get through a bad day then revel in your Mary days x

[@Beanjast]

Thank you so much! I don't always give myself the allowances I need, and your words honestly mean so much!

[@MKMonsterr]

Call yourself whatever you like, but please don't feel like you're not "____ enough" to be included in the spoonie club. Every meet-up I've ever been to was diverse and welcoming and no one has ever questioned anyone in the group. I swear one of the greatest moments of my summer this year is when I sat among a group of spoonies at a meet-up and had a nice collective eye roll at some dumb stuff we've all heard from non-disabled people.

[@treefrog1018]

I am a part-time spoonie. I have an autoimmune condition that flairs up now and then. When I am in remission, I have all the spoons (well, sort of...I have to give some spoons up to avoid flair-ups but that's by-the-by).

[@pinkyhotmessx69]

Then don't use it

[@ThatSpoonieTransGuy]

I love how you explained that! Many people seem to forget to mention the difference in the amount of energy things can take for spoonies and non-spoonies.

[@squirrel6536]

When you're not technically counted as disabled, but definitely have Mary AND Alice days (severe ankle, back, tendon problems) and this is just the best video you've found to describe it... Some days I can do everything I want to do, and so I am Mary and I clean my room, go to work, get things done and can still go out and about (these are rare days). A lot of my days are not Mary days; they are Alice days or somewhere in between where I have to use my cane or the little electric cart and I get looked at in that way that says "well, you're young, you don't need this." But... I do. I do.

[@supriyachesser6102]

I’m just watching Jessica’s spoon video for the first time. I noticed your comment and wondered if you’ve considered an Ehlers Danlos syndrome. I was recently diagnosed with it, and might be worth googling??

[@MingusTale]

I love that you used the Sims! Very entertaining! I'm not a spoonie but I'm definitely not as high functioning as Mary either! When it's the weekend and I will be going out, I find myself holing up in my room doing nothing for the whole of the rest of the time. Will aim to be more Mary in the future.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

+MingusTale I think we all aim to be more Mary! Glad you liked the video even though it's not something you'd connected with before 😊 xxx

[@clearly_blurry3416]

#BeMoreMary

[@Katiefalldown]

I have OCD and ADD. one thing I use to explain it is like having 10 staticy radios on at the same time and trying to understand what they all are saying at the same time. all while trying to look like not putting that much effort into it. Then you add in all the OCD craziness and trying not to have meltdowns in front of people.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Thank you for sharing- that definitely sounds like it needs a lot of spoons!

[@JixieDyeAuthor]

I have ADHD and Autism and I share and feel your pain. Also I'm registered blind and there are days I don't even want to walk out of my house. EVERYTHING is soo much. Unfortunately I work from home so just getting up in the morning and realising I have to SIT at my computer while my dogs are fighting and actually CONCENTRATE to do HOURS of work every day without procrastinating......yeah. Stay strong girl!

[@mulliganstew72]

Me too....ADHD & OCD. yep, Ain’t that the truth!!

[@amys.5619]

This is incredibly helpful as far as explaining my energy levels. I can only do "active" things early in the day, and people have a hard time believing that I can do something at 8:00 AM that I cannot do at 4:00 PM.

[@HorseyGirlRides]

I'm intrigued as to your opinion on whether someone w/ mental health disorders could use the term spoonie? This more or less entirely determines how my life is because my energy can be Mary one day and Alice the next so yhh, idk. Just wondered if someone who uses it could have give me an opinion on this 👌

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Personally I would certainly say that someone with mental health disorders could use the term 'spoonie' since they have a condition that affects energy- I know it can be tiring to cope with mental disorders! There are probably a few people who disagree but that's my opinion x

[@APersonWithAName1819]

KadenAadi you can!

[@Dungeonfreak]

KadenAadi I have chronic illness and mental health problems and definitely think you can use the spoon theory for mental health

[@solveigst-juste1126]

I think you can, but it surely wouldn't have the same exact meaning as someone who uses it for a physical illness. I mean, I know both are really tiring since I suffer from both, but being exhausted emotionally and mentally really doesn't feel like the exhausted of a physical illness. At least, that's how I live it. But you can totally use that word to describe your exhaustion related to a mental disorder,

[@melanieapril18]

My first thought was My mental illness starts me off with maybe 10 spoons, and everything takes a solid 2 more than someone without. I was going to share this as an explanation of the exhaustion and draining effect of mental health issues.

[@bethsnow246]

Hi Jessica, I really liked your description of the spoon theory! I have cystic fibrosis but don't use the term 'spoonie' very often, mostly because all my friends and family already know how much energy I have per day and can tell when I need to rest. If I overtire myself and run out of spoons then I get a terrible headache and can't sleep which seems strange because I am really tired.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Oh my gosh: same! Why does being tired equate to not being able to sleep?! Glad you liked the video x

[@really-quite-exhausted]

Beth Snow Hi Beth fancy seeing you here :) This video explained the spoon theory really well - I remember you mentioning it to me one time but only once I guess. My mum's friend has MS and he thinks of energy more like a phone running out of charge over the course of the day (sleeping charges it up) but this version also makes you think about different people starting out with different numbers of spoons in the first place.

[@lynnschmitt7538]

I have a chronic illness. I had never heard of this before but this totally described how I feel. Holy crap.

[@sel8466]

This is amazing! I love how you used Sims to explain spoons to everyone. As a spoonie, Alice was super relatable. You just want to be able to do all the things you’re supposed to do but you...can’t? Tiring, frustrating, and then you have to explain to people that you’re tired from a disability they can’t see :( But I’m so glad you exist and are educating people on these important topics! You’re great! 😄

[@moppleinga7025]

important point - about spoon theory-if you go over, you can spend days weeks or months with say 3 instead of 25 spoons...so the "just push yourself" group don't realise. if you can do something one day-they think youre being over-sensitive and psychosomatic if you can't do it the next-they don't get that doing it on day 1 is WHY you can't do it on day 2. "but you transferred fine earlier so i know you can do it"-yeah-earlier! aargh. i am CONSTANTLY told about how i should "build myself up" by exersising..by family and friends-if you dont use it youll lose it-no i DID use it and now ive lost it because i used it. one particularly horrendous A&E visit had a nurse who forced me to get on a bed that was too high despite me saying i can't..then came back in put the bed down after theyd helped me-"to teach me a lesson" or "stop being silly" i guess. it' then was brutal while taking blood..ive not gone since despite many times being advised to. Its not the first time ive encountered passive-aggressive medical staff. ive been told to "see things and hear things" when i had a 9 month migraine i ended up at neurology for, or the physio after my accident that kept making me do stuff "out of curiosity" that would hurt me to do with legs when it was my back that was injured..and when making small talk asked me how i visited firends or family..i mean wtf. Why do ordinary people or even low end professionals in the medical field declare themselves the disability mafia/police and it is not easy doing life when you have to calculate your spoons during every interaction and task, instead of listening to someone youre thinking "ok i have x amount of seconds more before i collapse" if youdo anything without chair family say "oh you dont even need it". its been decades and no amount of explaining has changed things. In fact, theyre response is "we all get tired".."so i understand" yeah but i bet you dont get trapped in rooms cos you cant turn the door handle?or unable to tank your car?

[@rockercaterrorencountered4924]

My mom is in the "just push yourself" camp. I was recently diagnosed with ME/CFS and, not only does she not believe I have it, she firmly believes I'll "get better with exercise", even though exercise has almost a 75% chance of making my symptoms worse. She keeps saying it would be "such a shame" if I lost more mobility to my illness, but she doesn't understand that pushing me *will* make me lose more mobility! I'm trying to get a power wheelchair for when I go back to college. My mom says that it's "stressful" to talk about and wants me to "talk about something else". I'm sorry I was diagnosed with a chronic illness and now have to come to terms with my limited mobility and find ways to cope with it???

[@pinkyhotmessx69]

Yep and there's borrowing tomorrow's spoons

[@minaolenpossu]

I am glad I found this. I've been chronically ill since birth and I always had the worst time trying to describe what was going on with me. People used to think I just avoided going out because I was "depressed". Amazing!

[@candlebriar1955]

I dunno if spoonie applies to me but I have an anxiety disorder (social and general) and depression. It's a fairly common combination but it's a bit like being pulled apart by two opposing forces. If I spend time resting to regain the energy my depression drains then I become increasingly anxious that I am not doing 'enough', not 'good enough', etc and will get all the fun physical symptoms like nausea, headaches, inability to sleep, racing heart, etc. Which make me even more anxious because obviously I must be dying if I feel this sick. If I don't rest enough to feed both my activities and depression then I crash and burn and will be unable to do anything for days. I can get up to go to the toilet. That's all. Which is often accompanied by those wonderful thoughts depression brings. Like I'll amount to nothing anyway so why bother? Nothing seems to recharge me except lying in bed doing absolutely nothing. I am getting help. I am on medication, regular check ups and doing behaviour therapy stuff (attempting to stimulate the brains production of 'happy hormones' through altering behaviours and habits). But it's difficult to distinguish being actually recharged and just being on my way to a panic attack and it's difficult to ever predict which side is winning the tug of war. This was a very useful video though. I think I understand the concept better now.

[@violentXcupcakes]

Candle Briar I was thinking the same thing I have almost the exact same problem, especially since I get terrible bouts of depression that can last from anywhere between a couple days and a week that cause me to sleep all the time and that lack of moving about makes me feel worse because then I feel weak and fuzzy headed and end up neglecting normal responsibilities like putting away dirty plates and cups and even just picking up clothes which means I get anxiety about the mess so even though I sleep I don’t rest until I’m so stressed that I force myself to clean and by the time I’ve cleaned I feel even more exhausted and it just loops. This is especially painful if you have an obligation like a dinner or meeting that requires you to get ready and somewhere for a certain time and often I just end up calling it off.

[@candlebriar1955]

redfox01001011 Yes! It’s hard to just live day-to-day. It eats up energy doing things that other people seem to just do. I am forever in awe that people exist that don’t have to carefully track the last time they showered or washed the dishes because they just.. do it. It’s no big deal. My psych keeps having to reassure me that it’s okay to be proud that I took the trash out instead of feeling like a failure because taking the trash out shouldn’t be a big event. Throwing in extra commitments always throws me off. I struggle to do it too. It seems like I have to choose between going and being wiped out for potentially days or weeks. Or don’t go and feel like I am clearly failing to function because who does that? I have started to just explain that my mental health means I am not always able to fulfil commitments and I definitely cannot do highly social events right now. I definitely feel your pain. It has gotten better for me over the course of this year, but progress is so slow. I hope that you find some balance.

[@thenaadia777]

I feel exactly the same!

[@lydiasfontouri3466]

I am perfectlly healthy, i have a boyfriend, an excellent familly, a great education, i should have all those spoons. But i have a severe anxiety disorder this last year and i feel that my spoons are not enough to get me through the day. And i feel so bad about that, there are people with serious problems and i can't even find what causes me this reaction, i don't know why i feel so exhausted doing the smallest task. Your videos really make me stand up and start living! Seeing someone with a very challenging life, smilling ,is the wake up call we all need.

[@james1616]

This helped make everything so clear! I struggle with this weird, loopy combination of terrible insomnia, chronic fatigue, adhd, and anxiety and its always been really hard for me to describe how hard it can be for me to find the energy to do simple things without compromising the rest of my day. Im going to try to show this to some of my family- thank you!

[@kat1984]

I have severe chronic pain as well as clinical depression and this theory made sense. I sent this to my partner because it directly relates to a conversation we had the other day. There are days when just getting out of bed is a major accomplishment. Pain makes me dizzy and nauseous if I'm on my feet for more than 5-10 minutes.

[@ohleander02]

Wanted to mention....spoon theory and spoonie don't just apply to physical disability. Major Depressive Disorder here, so......yeah. Yep. I wouldn't say I'm disabled, though. I would say that the combination of MDD and PTSD affects every aspect of my life and it makes my life fucking complicated and some days it's just difficult getting out of bed. And that doesn't even include or account for the Vertigo and slight hearing loss. Sighs.

[@treefrog1018]

Oh yeah. I use the spoon theory for my PSTD. I could totally handle my trigger for a few hours but if I do, that will put me out for an entire week so...if my friends wanna do something that involves a trigger...I'll just stay home and play sims... :)

[@ZoeDaveyAAP]

As soon as I saw Spoon Theory mixed with Sims I leapt to this video. You are a wizard Jessica. Always wonderful. I love the videos of the sims hahahahaha xxx

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Aw, thank you! Glad you liked the video, it was definitely a great excuse to play The Sims 😅

[@avidreader2316]

I have only recently heard of the spoon theory and your video really helped me understand it. I have never thought of it like that but I can relate. I'm 23 and my energy levels are nowhere near that of my peers. I am diabetic and also anemic and I can never get a good night's sleep. I never understand people who say that they wake up in the morning feeling refreshed because I don't know what that feels like. For me going to taking a shower, getting dressed and going to classes is a productive day. Discovering your channel really has made me feel understood. You are a gem! Everything that comes out of your mouth sounds poetic :) Also, you are gay so that's a plus! I am bisexual and it always makes me very excited to see wlw KZbinrs.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Thank you so much! Really glad to know my channel helps you, that's the whole reason I started it 💕

[@kitprojects]

I'm T1D too (and LGBT and a redhead) and apparently insomnia/ poor sleep can be a side effect, linked to hormone levels and also what level of sleep we enter and in what frequency. Unfortunately there isn't very much research on hormonal impacts on things like the disturbed nervous system, hormones and immune system balance and the way it effects beta-aminobutyric acid (GABA) in diabetics it's alll "control your BSLs BLAAHHHH". My Dad is also T1D and my brother read that Gaba supplements should help with diabetes related inability-to-switch off, unlike non-diabetic healthy people which apparently the supplements wouldn't work for since it wouldn't breach the blood/brain barrier. You could give something like that a shot?

[@Hanklerfishies]

I heard about this theory a while ago and I love it. I don't actually count spoons but it helps me figure out what priorities to spend energy on.

[@kathleenmaryparker8662]

Wow ! I am actually watching this on the 25th of January ! Happy Birthday ! Your videos are great - very helpful, and I really relate to them as I have several types of chronic migraine, and other undiagnosed chronic pain & fatigue - and your sense of humor really cheers me up !

[@ollie8500]

Jessica! I just found this three years later as I just got diagnosed with autism and suddenly the term spoonie and this video popped up in my head! So I’m back and YES this explains so much. Thank you 😊

[@APersonWithAName1819]

It's funny because as I'm watching this, I'm laying in bed after eating breakfast, trying to get enough energy to shower

[@PowerToolsnPearls]

Thank you SO much for your time and videos! We have many of the same illnesses and you're more pleasant (by far) than I am. Whenever I need to explain something to people I grab the appropriate video from you and share with them. Some days attempts at explaining to others takes 5 spoons.

[@kaliehamilton7641]

I’m not disabled but, this really resonated with me. I’ve experienced depression my entire life along with many problems sleeping and things such as going into public and being in social situations do seem to “take my spoons” in a way that I’m absolutely exhausted. And this is an excellent metaphor, thank you!

[@racheltaylor8831]

As a fellow spoonie, I cannot love this video enough. Thank you! (Also I'm new to your channel. Loving it here. 💙)

[@tracigresham7164]

Love, love, love the way you explained the spoon theory! Was so fun to watch!

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

+Traci Gresham glad you enjoyed the video xxx

[@miaraavalin4795]

I love this theory explains so much. I’ve tried using it a few times. Sometimes you have to remind people but it really helps.

[@mikelee158]

The spoonies community has helped me so much to learn how to better use my time and prove to me that my illnesses are not my fault. I have chronic insomnia and depression with lots of fatigue and aches and pains. I have sinus issues that make it hard for me to hear people clearly. The spoonie community is a blessing on those hard days.

[@popemse2839]

Youre gay, vintage, a disabled KZbinr, AND you play the Sims 2? AH you're the perfect youtuber

[@LeonardThynn]

I don't think I'd use the term ever, but I do relate to this. I've been struggling with burnout and anxiety for the past two years and it has slightly similar limitations, though I think it's more to do with motivation than energy, really. I've been having to build up daily tasks from scratch again, and though I've finally managed to make "brush my teeth" consistent and manage to only skip one class a week (trying to get this down to zero!), showers, meals, sleeping, cleaning, exercise, and any sort of social or outside activity is still a struggle. Also, I would like to say that I discovered your channel a week ago, and it's brought me much needed information, some joy, and entertainment. Especially your videos about deafness - I have a whole friend group in the deaf community, and it's helped me understand some things and how I can change myself.

[@mulliganstew72]

I just found your channel. You’re the best KZbinr on chronic conditions!! …You burst with charisma and your humor’s on point. i’m a raging perfectionist also, doing my hair & make up is sometimes so tiring I never actually get out The door. It also takes me 5x longer than an average person cause I lose everything I touch!!! I often tell myself, “its okay...everyone else can enjoy the sun.I’m busy having a sleeping contest with Cocobutta” ( my Mainecoon cat -she always gets her 8 hours LOL ). Thank you so much woman!

[@babybooiluvyou]

Ive never heard the spoon theory before, and i love it. Thank you for making this video. I have dealt with chronic pain and chronic fatigue since the birth of my son. And it is so hard to explain that im not "just tired" or i don't "just ache"... its so much more than that. And yes, using all my spoons in one day means that the next day i will have less. This is so relatable. Thank you again. Im loving your videos.

[@lemonnguy]

This is several years late, but one thing I've taken to describing my energy level is through the D&D 5e spell slots system? Basically, spellcasters have a certain amount of "spell slots" they have in a day. And if they want to cast a spell, they need to use up a slot. They have 9 levels of spells, and will generally have more low level slots than higher level slots. You can use a higher level slot to cast a low level spell, but you can't do the opposire (ie; use a low level slot to cast a high level spell), which I've found is also more applicable to my day to day life? Like, I can use up my "5th level slot" to cast the "Take A Shower" spell, which is a 2nd level spell. But I can't use a 1st level slot to cast "Go To The Movies With Friends" because it is a 7th level spell. I dunno, but i thought this might help?

[@felikso]

yes yes yes yes yes!!! this is what I use too for describing things sometimes!! the existence of "cantrips" is also really useful, because most days, getting dressed in the morning or brushing my teeth will be a cantrip, but if I'm going through a rough patch, everything moves Up a couple of spell-levels, and suddenly those 'cantrips' are 1st or 2nd level spells, and I don't have the energy for them first thing in the morning. I also have sensitive triggers, and I often describe them like- psychic attacks- where I'll very rarely "roll a crit 20" and be oKay. that also helps me rationalise varying responses, and not extrapolate from One Good Response meaning I'm "suddenly way better" (working on my toxic optimism, haha). it also helps with describing trends over time, like- the DC for a panic attack has become lower as time goes on: it doesn't mean I can't get them, and it doesn't mean that if I do get one it's a sign things are worse, it's just that it's less likely for me to roll badly enough to experience one. and- I also experience "overload" from eg. Producing Too Much Formal Writing, or Socialising Too Much, or Large Sensory input. and a d&d podcast I listen to (D&R) has a werewolf character, with a mechanism where- if the character experiences a stressor, they have to roll a certain number of d4 (the worse the stressor, the more d4s). the result is taken away from a set of 'mental health points', and if they hit zero, they transform. and for me, that same kind of 'rolling stress die' metaphor is Good for describing the various Actions and Inputs which wear me down until I might get some kind of overload shutdown, or other Bad Mental Health Response.

[@donw183]

I use Spoon Theory to explain my Depression/Anxiety/Autism/Gastro issues not letting me do things that I would like to. On a normal day I tend to have about 20 spoons, but since I got my gallbladder out I am down to about 10 spoons until I heal more. I had friends visit to check on my yesterday. They were wonderful and did what they could to not steal all my spoons, though I still had to take time out at the end to regain spoons. Your analogy to a Sims life is very accurate for me. Also, thank you for choosing to share your lives with us. Your voice is soothing for me and helps me gain spoons. Please remember that you are worthy of praise and happiness, and I wish you and Claudia the best. -Dawn

[@mrslauramay]

My husband and I have used the Sims energy bars for shorthand to explain where we are for years, even long after we stopped playing! I kind of expected to see their bars in relation to the spoons, but I imagine it would be hard or even perhaps not currently possible to set Sims up to have such varied needs for the point of this video. But wouldn't it be a lovely exercise in empathy if we could!?! And for all I know they have made them more inclusive recently. That would be delightful. Thank you for sharing this. And I'm glad you at least gave her beautiful hair! I had wondered how you managed to keep yours so very impressive even before seeing how hard something some may assume as "simple" as a shower is for you. And what's fascinating to me is I know those with such similar struggles for entirely different reasons. Thanks for making our world more empathetic. I adore you and your videos.

[@quieshehope1352]

Jessica, You did a marvelous job explaining spoonie theory and how it works. I didn't do so well trying to explain the theory when I used the word "spoonie" with my family. You also surprised me with explaining that using too many spoons in a day means tomorrow you will have less . Oh and showers the temp if too warm can zap every spoon right there and then. Thky!!! Your positive attitude and sense of humor about being a spoonie is beautiful!!!

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Thank you! You're very right about the temperature. I hope the video helped you to explain to your family 💗

[@quieshehope1352]

I will do well this time....... your going to do it for me, when I share your video with them : ) : )

[@sarahwolf4429]

I use this concept with my clients (OT) all the time but more in terms of a bucket or glass of water (ex. Sleep fills the bucket, making the bed empties it). OT talks about saving energy as “energy conservation” if you want to look up details. It’s helpful for everything from MS to introverts managing “social energy” cost/benefits. My focus is always helping people find what “fills their bucket” or in your term “gets more spoons”. Also, thank you as always for being you

[@tonibauer8051]

I was involved in a motorcycle accident in 2005 and sustained a very serious spinal cord injury, I also have fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue and chronic migraines along with arthritis and blood clots in my lungs and a heart condition.... Did I mention I am only 39 years old?!?!? You and your story resonates very loudly with me on so many levels... I use a walker, wheelchair and walking stick. I live in Ohio, U.S.A. and I really love how with all of your "catalogs" as we call them in our family,you stay so positive and upbeat. I look forward to seeing your videos and have been watching them all the time. Thank you for making me feel "normal". I can relate to so much of your afflictions and understand them completely. You are an inspiration and again I thank you... I also love your tutorials and your knowledge of a bygone era that I wish more people would have learned from

[@smilerkp]

I have bad back pain but have never really had a named "disability" however I stick to the spoon theory and often find that I have to plan days and weeks in advance as I can wipe myself out of energy. I often get comments that I look exhausted and like I burn myself out whereas it just that my spoons are low and that I need to go home and rest. I have never found a way to recover spoons but I work as a camera operator and I know that if I have a days shoot I will need to give my self a full day without spoons after to recover. Great video on the spoon theory and well explained! Thank you. Was trying to explain to a friend and they found this video really easy to understand.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

So welcome, really glad the video helped your friend understand! x

[@lolaball6325]

I have an autoimmune disease, and a cocktail of mental health disorders (MD, Generalised Anxiety Disorder, Depression) so almost everything takes spoons. Showering hurts, going into public is terrifying, being around people is terrifying, being alone is terrifying, MD makes people annoyed at me. I try to be more positive, and seeing a disabled person with such a lovely attitude really helps me have a good outlook on life. Your videos have really made an impact on me. You have much worse disability than me, and doing things i take for granted are difficult for you so to see you in a good mood is incredibly inspiring! Thank you.

[@katieodonnellyoutube]

I DIDN'T KNOW OTHER PEOPLE USED SPOONS I'M AUTISTIC I FEEL REPRESENTED AND VALIDATED BY THIS VIDEO THANK YOU SO MUCH

[@ItsHardBeingJade]

yup, its a sign lol I made sims looking like you and your wife the night before I discovered this channel and now I'm seeing this vid... thank god I subscribed. thank you for explaining this theory.

[@Microrapttor]

Jessica! Thanks for posting this. I feel like more people need to be aware of this theory, as it can help them understand what it's like to have a disability. It's hard sometimes because people think you're trying to get out of something by blaming your disability. I've been living with CRPS for a few years and heard about this theory a little while ago. It's taken years to accept the fact that rest is needed and OK. It's been extremely difficult to let go of the life I led before and carry on with new goals. Thanks for being an inspiration to me and for reminding me of this theory. Being a spoonie myself, it's easy to forget that it's completely OK to rest when you need it without feeling bad about not finishing the massive list of tasks you made for yourself the day before.

[@keepadriansinging8062]

This is the perfect way to describe most of my days. I have stage 4 cancer plus other invisible issues and since I still have my hair and seem to look "healthy" people give me the dirtiest looks using the door opener button or takin the elevator for one floor. They seem to think being "sick" or having certain things that are hard or energy consuming must leave a person looking a certain way. I just discovered your channel today and I want to say how much I admire you for making videos like this and opening up your personal life to educate people and make the world a better, more understanding place. I admire you because I've tried to do this but my anxieties and other issues to make something like this more difficult for me. I try to justify why I can't film and edit a video and post once a week or so until I see you making this. Sorry chemo brain. Hope this novel - tapped out with one finger made sense.

[@Kekko1]

I just recently identified as disabled for the first time at work, and got immediately told that 'you're so young', as though that matters. I have fibro and CFS, and I empathize with Alice so much. Your videos are always lovely to watch, and so validating.

[@HAlC-up4hm]

This is wonderful :) I'd never heard the term "spoonie" before, but I definitely see it applying to my life. I'm on the autism spectrum and a meltdown is what happens when we have 0 spoons left. Thankfully, as I've gotten older I've learned to recognize the signs of low spoons and take a break. lol There are a lot of things that steal our spoons NT's would never think of, so sometimes it looks like a meltdown is random or happens for no good reason. The fewer spoons I have left, the more stressed I get, because I know I need an escape, and the harder it is to act "normal". Camouflaging yourself and acting like you're a NT steals SO. MANY. SPOONS.

[@nunpho]

HAlC11235 yes, I'm just the same! Things are constantly overwhelming and it's just exhausting

[@theGhostSteward]

Love your channel, I come back for some sad reasons, basically being recently diagnostic with bipolar, getting covid, getting ill, possible IBD, possible Crohn's disease (waiting for a conclusive diagnosis), which means I have to slow adapt to chronicle fatigue together with the extreme changes in energy my moods bring (yes, even with medication). I love your channel and you open my eyes to so much, thank you.

[@VizzyInks]

I really admire you for speaking about this and not crying, because I definitely did just from listening. Great video! I did have 20 years of my body fully working and now grief is eating me alive but I am slowly adjusting. Veeery slowly.

[@strawsofftheneurodivergent4221]

Wow definitely this makes sense, such a good metaphor. Wow having so much energy like Mary. It is amazing how much energy some people have.

[@Chaggit]

I have fibromyalgia and that is the most relatable description of a shower I've ever heard in my life. I don't often use spoon theory to explain to people how I live with chronic illness, but I've definitely 'borrowed' spoons from tomorrow to do things today. It's kind of like if you know that having fewer than 5 spoons left at the end of the day means you're going to have to rest way more tomorrow, but you get yourself down to 1 or 2 spoons anyway. I tend to do that a lot during the holiday season since I live in a rural area and going to a WalMart is a 30 minute drive, and the closest city with a mall is an hour's drive. I just have to plan for rest days.

[@kirstenv1279]

This is so creative!! Love how you used the Sims to explain. Subscribed xx

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Hi new subscriber! Glad you liked the video x

[@ghost__char7972]

This video really encompasses the struggles of spoonies compared to ables. We need to be here for each other xx

[@letstrytobekind]

I was so excited to find this video! I'd never heard the term "spoonie" before, but I've often heard people in casual conversation refer to "not having enough spoons" to do such-and-such. (Maybe because I have many friends in the disabled community?) I hadn't realized it was from an actual article-I'd just had the concept casually explained to me & it made so much sense to my own experience that I've often talked about having/using spoons and find it useful to think about my energy levels this way. I do have some physical health issues (chronic kidney disease, arthritis, pinched nerves, etc.), but my spoon issues primarily come from my mental health problems (especially bipolar disorder and anxiety), which are severe enough that the government identifies me as disabled and gives me benefits because I'm unable to work. If I'm severely depressed, I have almost no spoons at all, but if I'm manic, I have so many spoons I could tango on the moon! And if my anxiety is severe enough, then something that might normally not take many spoons at all (like having lunch with a friend or even just walking down a crowded street) might take so many spoons that it just feels impossible. Managing spoons is especially difficult for me when it comes to my anxiety, because I feel ashamed of it, like I "should" be able to do such-and-such because everyone else can, and so I push myself, and I don't realize that I've used too many spoons until I'm completely unable to function and have broken down crying on the bus or something. It's like I ignore my spoon stash because I don't want to admit that it's limited in this embarrassing way. Nope! Not looking at the spoons! Because if I don't look at them, then they don't exist! Then ... suddenly ... uh oh! I suddenly have no spoons, with no warning! I guess, for me, I think of having physical health spoons *and* mental health spoons. So if I have bronchitis (which happens a lot), then I don't have many physical health spoons and have to rest a lot. But if I'm really anxious then I don't have many mental health spoons and need to cut myself slack about things that are emotionally difficult. There's overlap for me, because, for example, depression depletes both my mental and physical spoons. Severe depression can make just getting out of bed a significant challenge, let alone showering. Depression can be just exhausting, both physically and emotionally. I hope none of this seems belittling to people with "real" disabilities like CFS, PoTS, and MS, but I think this concept can be useful to many of us with different kinds of problems that affect our energy and how it may differ from other people's. I think it can help us to feel less judgmental of ourselves, and just be matter-of-fact, just "Well, I've got this many spoons, and I need to save some up for this thing later in the day, so taking a nap right now is actually the best thing to do so I can build myself back up a bit," instead of bombarding ourselves with "shoulds." Like we all "should" have the same number of spoons and use them at the same rate for the same things. This idea of spoons helps concretize a concept that otherwise may seem nebulous and therefore easily dismissed. This has been very long-winded, but I just wanted to tell you how much your videos mean to me, not only for myself but also for all the people I know in the disabled community (and the people I don't know but still support). I can't imagine how you find the spoons to make all these videos and to be so positive, but you make a real difference in people's lives, including mine. Thank you!

[@alanagee6043]

Man this is very much a hit of self realization. You’re very good at explaining things and I’ve never heard of spoonie but I can for sure benefit from it. I’ve really pushed myself being a single mum of a beautiful precious little girl who just turned one ! Yay ! So I’m trying to find the best ways to improve my energy levels. I’ve passed out from warm showers. A lot. In order to be sure I give the best love and care possible for my little one, I’ve really put myself on the back burner. I do all I can to conserve all my energy for her and stay well as I can for any emergency that could pop up. I am such a huge fan of pin up style you’re going to keep me as a loyal fan. You’re hitting on everything I deal with and much more. Showing you never let it keep you down and when you are down, you never put yourself down. If that makes sense lol. Love !

[@LocalHarryLover]

Wow, I saw you on BBC and I'm so glad I found your channel! I LOVE SIMS 2!! I think you do a good job demonstrating the spoon theory here with the Sims. My sister and I don't talk about spoons as "spoons" with each other but we actually sometimes use the Sims as a metaphor instead like - "Oh, it's like coming home and all your bars are in the red!" And all the Simmers among us know how crazy it is managing a Sim who comes home with their bars all low, so that really works as a metaphor. :) (Spoonie Simmers for the WIN!) I think I do borrow spoons from the next day - my adrenaline can sometimes take me further than my body should go that day, and I pay for it the next day. It's often worth it when I borrow those spoons to do something fun, like on Friday I went to a Harry Potter orchestra concert which was amazing, but I couldn't do anything for the next two days except go to the pharmacy to refill my prescription. To me it works to conceptualize that as borrowing spoons. (I did a rough calculation later and I'd used over 3 days' worth of spoons on that one Friday, and it's taken me at least three days to recover from it since I also had a big presentation that day.) Anyway, I don't usually leave such long comments, but your video really resonated with me. Thanks for making it and have a nice day. :)

[@pnhnut]

I understand and accept the spoon theory and it is a good talking point with folks for sure. You can give them a visual and explain just as you did how it works and tailor it to your specific situation. Like for me, I often explain it like there is an inner battle going on that causes my outer self to be beaten up. So my cells over react to things, and so I have to limit its ability to do that. I live my life in perpetual caution and I hate it. Sigh... it has been a long hard road and there is no end in sight. This is the depression side of the "invisible disability". Thanks for all you do!

[@terrilouise5767]

I can't believe I've only just found this video. It helped me so much. I get called lazy because I need to rest a lot. I've not been diagnosed with any autoimmune issues but I do have clinical depression, anxiety and emotional intensity disorder. All high functioning (which means I'm good at pretending I'm okay) All of these can be really debilitating some days but this is an excellent way to explain it to those that don't understand what I have to go through on a daily basis. Thank you ❤️

[@LAGoddesss2006]

Hi! Just found your channel and this video for the first time - someone shared it in a chronic illness group I'm in and it's great, you're lovely! Forgive me for not knowing your story/struggles but the shower is such a huge relatable thing for me. It. Is. Draining! Before I was diagnosed I knew I hated showers but didn't know why, they made me feel better being warm and clean yet also way worse bc it took all of my energy. I decided to grow my hair to donate and as it got longer I struggled more and more with showers and washing and I wasn't doing a good job... so I "trained" it (aka went through a gross oily stage) to not need to be washed as often AND started getting it washed at Great Clips (and other quick salons) for about $5-8 every 2 weeks. Best thing I ever did. Granted, I'm lazy about my hair and it lives in a high bun all the time so it's not nearly as fabulous as yours, but it stays clean and presentable that way with the very least effort. It still takes energy to go out and get it washed but I try to do it on a day when I have to go out anyway so that I'm already dressed and ready. Something to consider and my own personal "pro-tip". Best wishes ❤

[@luckieonline7845]

AHH OMG!! I just found your channel today and came across this video. This BLOW MY MIND because I have Ulcerative Colitis (an IBD) and I have been making a similar comparison to the spoon theory without ever knowing what it was. I describe it as having 'energy tokens'. The average person has 10 tokens, and while I'm in a flare up, I have about 4 or 5. So I have to choose my daily activities wisely on these days or I will be sicker for longer. SO COOL!!

[@scatterbrained1912]

I was so happy when I found out about the spoonie theory, it makes it much more harmless and easy to tell my close ones why I'm saying no to things sometimes and why I just flat out pass out and sleep for 16 hours sometimes. Especially my boyfriend finds it very helpful to be able to have a guestimated number off spoons in the particular day or to calculate plans and idea when he knows if I'm in a "just bought a big box of cutlery from ikea" or "using that leftover plastic yoghurt spoon and a salad scooper" period. It's so much easier to say "I used up some of todays spoons yesterday" rather than "I grossly miscalculated how much I can take on and now all I wanna do is sleep and cry because I feel like I can't do all the things I want"

[@franreynolds2133]

I've always really liked the spoon theory as I find it's a really great way of explaining to non-spoonies why I am the way I am. I really loved your description of the theory though Jessica - it's really bang on. It did make me sad though - Mary just gets to live life and not even think about spoons. What a luxury. I've definitely found that since being more well (haha that's terrible English...) I am able to borrow spoons - but I definitely think that concept is only possible if you have a lot more spoons to start with. Although the feeling I get when I've done it is hideous - naps and sleep don't touch it, it feels like you can't breath or are thirsty or hungry or something but you can't even begin to try and make it go away. It's not exhaustion but something I can't quite explain!

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

I am so with you on that description! Being in extreme exhaustion is a deep need within your body that cannot be quenched by anything except time- and only then if you do absolutely nothing! It's a pain that we have to think about it whilst other people don't but at least we're not alone 💗

[@simsun2]

I love your videos! I have hypermobile joint syndrome, IBS and anxiety. I kind of consider myself a spoonie because there are some things (like standing up for longs periods of time or doing finicky things with my hands) that take up a lot of energy because my joints don't work like they are supposed to and so unlike normal people, standing upright takes up more energy. Some days are better than others, but if for example I have a day at work and I am on the shop floor all day then I get very tired and foggy by the time I'm home and I don't have the energy to do other things like self-care ect. It's worse during winter cause that's when my joints are worse. I love this video!! So helpful!!

[@deimo3763]

I just found your videos and I love them (and you)!! I'm 16 and I've only now been diagnosed with a bunch of things (ADD and Irlen Syndrome + mental health issues. We're also trying to find a doctor for an Aspergers diagnosis that won't cost my first born). I don't know if I would qualify as a 'Spoonie'. The day can be really exhausting even when I haven't done much. And although I enjoy going to things like music festivals (..1 yearly) I need to nap in the afternoon so I can keep going til late and spend a lot of time just sitting. On a normal day as much as I love going on walks I'm usually very 'tired' in the sense that things like lifting my arms up takes up a fair amount of effort, just little things like that really. I hope this is a health thing I can cure with exercise although I'm much too weak for push-ups or anything at the moment. Also we have the same birthday which made my really happy!

[@andreaprice3630]

I'd call myself a spoonie. I have a mental disability. I have asperger's and allllllll of the anxiety, crippling depression, etc. that goes along with it. Also, I dont metabolize medication right, so no anxiety meds for me! A dose you would give a child will knock me out for hours. (so sleep only) I also dont sleep well without it.. so.. you sorta get where I"m going with this. I use spoonies like a life bar you'd see in Legend of Zelda. I have a service dog that's really opened doors for me! I love watching you and you inspire me every day. Thank you for all that you do. Thank you for dragging yourself out of bed, being fabulous and strong.

[@jennifergraham8204]

Thank you! That was explained really well and I really related to it. I've always had a hard time getting seemingly "easy" tasks completed like showering, getting groceries, laundry or changing the sheets on my bed and I didn't understand why it was so easy for others to go go go and get everything I struggled to accomplish done so effortlessly and still have lots of energy to spare.

[@sugarlemonandspice]

I recently just started having issues with my legs. I have days where I can walk for miles and days where even just standing is nearly impossible. The muscles and nerves in my leg like to give up on me mid way shopping, or running errands. They feel like they have been stretched out by trucks and my feet tend to get cold because blood isn't distributed as needed. I have never heard of this theory before but now it all makes sense. I love your positive and bubbly personality, thank you for cheering me up :)

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

You're so welcome, Lovely. Sorry you've been having such a hard time of it recently! I hope your doctors can give you some answers and extra help soon 💕

[@Tbehartoo]

My friend likes to use the example of a phone battery instead of spoons. I think both are excellent ways to try to get people who aren't experiencing the constant drain on one's energy resources to understand a little what's going on. I love that you used SIMS to demonstrate this. Thanks for sharing it!

[@rachoule69]

I really find this theory interesting and helping ! And even as a non-chronic-illness-sufferer, I recently had mononucleosis ( which I know is nothing in comparison, ofc, it was just an eye-opener for me) and pushed myself way over my limits because I thought my body couldn't stop me from passing exams, going to school, showering, sleeping, etc, I ended up in hospital dehydrated and incapable of the simplest things and learned that it is okay to ask for help and to cut yourself some slack, and this theory helped me a looooot not to feel guilty and get better.

[@pinkmagicali]

I’m a massive fan of this description. I first came across is in a fanfic in regards to mental health. It’s so perfect.

[@nancyjohnson7147]

I don't have a disability (as in i don't have a diagnosis) but I do have a lower then average social battery, random unexplaimed joint pain, and chronic migraines, some days I 'll offhandedly comment that im out of spoons. Other days I feel bad, that i ever thought I qualified as a spoonie. But thats okay, i explained the theory to my mum (who does have several chronic conditions and a disability,) and now she uses it alot. Also long time subscriber just going back and looking at old videos and felt the need to comment.

[@tibicenlinnei4014]

Sometimes just getting the will to take a shower takes me an hour or two... Also you made me realize how hard of hearing I am. Most youtubers have me hitting that rewind button up to 20 times. My dad was mostly deaf and I'm hard of hearing in one ear (at last check....but I don't have insurance 😢) my dad had me learn some ASL but he passed and I slacked off....BUT YOU MOUTH YOUR WORDS BRILLIANTLY!!!! I'm floored. People need to open their mouths more.

[@meganluck9132]

Jessica, You have gorgeous red hair!

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

+Megan Luck thank you! Xxx

[@liv9598]

This video has helped me soo much. I’ve used it to help soo many other people and explain this theory to many of my friend and family because it’s easy to understand. So thank you for that because as a fellow spoonie and EDS human sometimes I don’t have the energy to explain it. Thank you!!

[@melissaknive3494]

I'm really late to the party on this post - Welcome to 2020, the year that refuses to be helpful for most people - Thank you for this introduction to the #Spoonie life... I've been watching your videos the last couple of weeks and it seems that (although completely different) we have struggled with the same healthcare coverage issues, although my medical mysteries have been in mental health, not physical, as much. I'm in an endless loop that I feel I have very few spoons as I'm physically struggling with lung problems as well as my regular mental issues. I appreciate your incredible work.

[@ibuprofem9901]

I have ADHD, autism, long-covid and chronic pain that may be related to something yet to be diagnosed (possibly fibromyalgia or arthritis). I use the spoon theory a lot to describe energy levels. I also do find that I am quite extraverted, and social contact can also restore some spoons for me. I think a helpful addition to the spoon theory is categorising them in social, mental, emotional, physical, academic, etc. spoons. I may have energy for socialising with housemates one day, but not for grocery shopping. I may have energy for D&D planning, but not for essay writing. I may have energy for a lecture, but not for a seminar. And all of these can go the other way round as well. So for anyone describing themselves as a spoonie I would recommend considering the different 'types' of spoons you have as well as how many you have.

[@miriam8376]

That’s a great metaphor. My doctor introduced mine as a bank account. Some activities cost a lot of energy while others are cheaper. You make deposits into your account with self-care activities, which also have different values. It’s easier to explain to people who don’t have disabilities but it’s not nearly as fun ;)

[@TheSnickers329]

I was diagnosed with Generlized Anxiety Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, Panic Attack Disorder, and Sevear Depression when I was 17. I am 21 now and coping has gotten better but I really tires you out to just smile for the day when inside you feel like your body if fighting you. I also happen to have an iron deficiency, and genetic problems with my knees that causes quite a bit of pain daily. This theory made sense to me and I love that you shared It!

[@shadedsky040692]

I love coming to this channel to learn. I used to work at the Wetherspoons pub chain and everyone who worked there would affectionately call each other "Spoonies". Had no idea the word spoonie could mean so much more to people. I'll use the word correctly from now on!

[@emilyjohnson6225]

i had spinal fusion because of severe scoliosis that spans almost my entire spine (t4-l4) and i suffer with chronic nerve pain and muscle tension. chronic pain makes EVERYTHING require more energy. just being awake takes up energy. i recently discovered spoon theory and it’s super helpful for me in explaining chronic pain to people who haven’t experienced any kind of disability. shout out to you and all my other people fighting invisible battles 🖤🖤

[@jessyl9525]

I think the Spoon Theory is a great way to explain to others about daily life with chronic illnesses, autoimmune diseases, and disabilities. For myself, with 2 (possibly 3 - that's in the works right now) chronic illnesses that are autoimmune disorders, I like Building a Ladder as I find I sometimes overestimate or underestimate my energy levels. Building a ladder keeps me going and appropriately pushing myself while still caring for myself, which as someone who has invisible illnesses is important. It shouldn't be - people shouldn't care how much I do or don't in a day - but it is. With spoons sometimes I give myself too many and end up in situations where I should really just be in bed, asleep, but instead I'm with a group of energetic people st a party and now they're bummed I'm so exhausted. But I'm just me and everyone is different.

[@amylabrom2217]

Thank you so much for making this video! I have Asperger Syndrome, Dyspraxia, Anxiety, Depression, and Uneven Leg Length that causes me a lot of problems with my hips. I’ve always followed the spoonie movement since I first found out about a few years ago, and I’ve always felt that I wasn’t ill enough to take part in the movement. However after reading the lovely comments here I think I’ll start using this term to help others understand my issues a bit better. I don’t have the best energy in the world and have to sleep for around 10 hours at least each night so that I can begin to cope with the day ahead. If I have a panic attack or a depressive episode it takes several spoons out of the equation, as well as if I have to do a lot of walking or if I’ve hurt my legs or hips. My autistic tendencies also affect my abilities to cope and deal with things that take place, as any changes that haven’t been preplanned catch me off guard and cause me a lot of anxiety. With all that being said though I wouldn’t change who I am for the world and I’m so proud of where I am today 😊🥄

[@AmandaCornell]

Fellow spoonie here. I have Ménière's Disease...I progressed over the yrs and lost my career and can rarely drive. I'm really glad I found your channel. I'm in America, thankful to have a good husband to pick up all that I can't do anymore. I love your use of the sims explaining it! The fatigue is real among all other things!

[@drwhowhatwhenwhy1165]

This explanation just caused me to have a moment. There's a poem I read a while ago, called "no spoons left" I understood the actual poem which was about the spoon theory, but I never got the title. Finding out about this, now, just adds another layer for me, and helps me understand what that means in that future, so, thank you!

[@deideisgirl59]

i think my favorite is that im a spoonie and I'm pansexual. i want to collect an entire kitchen!! anyway, on actual spoon theory, i think sometimes my spoons do carry over, but often they really don't, and same with spoon recovery, sometimes it happens, sometimes it doesnt. i suppose for me its more like playing a very glitchy game of sims. and sleeping is really hard for me rn. either i sleep 19 hours, 3 hours, or not at all. it sucks hardcore. like rn its 2:20am and i should be asleep, but im not. aahh but anyway, i love your channel so much and you look lovely in this video, as per usual.

[@nitac7174]

As someone who suffers from seizures and fainting, as well as some chronic pain, I really loved this video. I didn't know about this before. Showering is so so hard! I used to take it for granted as a kid. Thank you ♡

[@yeet632]

Apparently I'm in the minority when I say that showers make me gain spoons. I do sit down in the shower so that I'm not standing. The water really hurts at first but then it makes my nerves decide that they're not going to hurt anymore and also helps greatly with headaches. I guess it's kind of like using one spoon to gain 3 in return, I guess. Sometimes I'll use my very last spoon to get in just because I know it'll let me do one more thing before I go to bed :)

[@justinedwards5047]

I was introduced to this theory by several friends who use it in relation to mental disorders, I find it's really good short hand for explaining when you don't want to do something because you don't think you'd be able to get through it without issues, even though you don't currently feel unwell, you can just say "sorry I don't have the spoons to handle that right now" and everyone understands what you mean

[@StrawberryLil]

Wow, I have never heard of that theory before! That's so interesting. I will definitely read up the post about spoonies :) I love that you used the Sims in this video! Maybe it's time for me to play again ☺️

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Definitely time to play again! The Sims is the best ever * obsessed * 🖥

[@StrawberryLil]

ME TOOOO! The only reason I haven't played it in so long is that I misplaced my external device. 😅

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

+StrawberryLil the pain is real! 😄