What to Look For in a Woman And How to Foster it in Her if You Already Have One

Men, knowing what to look for and foster in a woman will impact the rest of your life. Hit me up on Instagram at @ryanmichler and share with me what’s working in your life.
What to Look For in a Woman
- Independence
- Low Maintenance
- Drama-Free
- Femininity
- Ambition
How to Foster It in a Woman
- Don’t fix her problems
- Don’t be so available
- Don’t be her girlfriend
- Be the man
- Foster her interests
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[@matthewshull591]

"When you act like a man you free up the space for her to act like a woman" - Couldn't be more true. Well said sir.

[@edusam666]

My adoptive sister told me once: i love it when we go out with the kids and you take over the logistics. Then i can be nore carefree... I was like what an idiot... Until i realized how important this is for them.

[@BeautifullyBlessedMoxie]

Amen

[@kathleenbaker2065]

In a world where the discipline and wisdom of genuine masculinity are getting harder and harder to find, your podcast is a real encouragement. Thank you, from the women who still want the "real deal" and are trying to raise boys to be real men!

[@Wilhelm4131]

It's women that killed those traits. in men but now many of them want it back. It's too late most of us just don't care enough to jump through the hoops and raise another mans children.

[@robarkesteijn3394]

@@Wilhelm4131 No it is not woman who killed those traits. It were man, who were not standing up to woman that were trying to kill those traits.

[@MuzikkJunkiee]

Well said Kathleen!!

[@ez-g3090]

You can thank modern feminism and women's equal rights for screwing up relationships for both men and women.

[@davidguidry657]

Thank you for stepping out of your comfort zone to ensure that your boys learn authentic masculinity. And thank you for acknowledging the difference that Ryan and his team are making.

[@frontdeskstaff9359]

One massive thing missing from this list. Some form of moral and spiritual foundation and accountability. Whether it be religion, culture, community, or family. Every single long lasting relationship I've ever witnessed, regardless of nationality and ethnicity, women have had a moral and spiritual foundation of some sort to hold them accountable. Men as well, but most cultures the world over have held men accountable to some standard of what a man is, Honor, Chivalry, etc. Where the equivalent for modern women is not nearly as prevalent.

[@B.I.-EIO_macdonald9786]

True

[@jonm57]

I agree. Religion (religious systems) are often viewed negatively. But they offer are wonderful framework for individual living, family, and healthy expectations.

[@raularmas317]

"let her struggle a bit". The "struggle" is what we were all put here for. It's otherwise known as "growing pains". The struggle is where real growth as a person of character takes place. Without the struggle/challenge we atrophy and become less capable.

[@777gallen]

Found a real good one four years ago. Smart, attractive, and loving, a real women. Only 2 fights in those 4 years that lasted all of an hour tops. I have 2 children from a previous marriage that failed from an EXTREMELY toxic women. Just found out my girl is pregnant and we’re having our first baby. Proposal would’ve happened sooner but her mom just passed and covid screwed up timing but now it’s crunch time. She also comes from a ranching family and her job with cattle is to castrate😳🤷‍♂️. I’ll watch my mouth gents.

[@stewiegriffin289]

Hello, Good luck with that as I do wish ya the best. She done what she is programmed to do. That’s real ya in real close make ya feel like a king and all is good so with that speaking from exp give it some more years and you will wake up one morning and she will put you through absolute hell rip everything from ya including your house and kids and have her new boyfriend try to take your place.. Then after she figures out she made a huge mistake and after you have healed then you actually have some sort of control at that point. Good luck man.

[@iammaximus614]

🐕‍🦺…..✂️✂️

[@zackscott8636]

i castrated piglets and dogon it’s really not an easy job if you’re empathetic

[@jp5419]

Awesome ❤

[@marylandgal5286]

This is amazing! How do you avoid fights like that ?

[@emmacarpenter9859]

I'm so thankful for my husband, he already did these things when we met and overtime I let go of trying to be the masculine one and it's such a relief and blessing to have a strong man lead you and your family. Its easy for women (and in my case a single parent before we met) to feel like we need to fill a man's role. It's also easy to be controlling about taking that from the man. My husband has been very patient with me and never forced me to change but instead let me realize I don't need to fill that role.

[@josephegnor9791]

Hit the jackpot 15 years ago with my wife. 13 years married and she still tics all 5 boxes positively.

[@soulbasskenny]

Great stuff Ryan. I went through my 62 years of life without this knowledge and paying for it now. To you younger guys, listen up! This is the truth. Thanks man!

[@eddiecarrasco878]

I'd add a sense of humor. Life is hard and humor is good way to lighten a day.

[@Greentunic84]

My son is 7 years old. I look forward to the day he starts dating and I can share this kind of advice with him. Cheers.

[@edwardbarraza4848]

@Bruce Gilder no it need to be explained, I suggest you start now, if not the world will

[@ez-g3090]

He won't find a compatible partner in today's feminist society. It's better for him to stay single.

[@MACKLife107]

I’m a 19 year old guy and I watch and learn a lot from your videos man love them 👍🏽💯super informative 💪🏽

[@brockstarg2296]

Same

[@jmpm-tz1so]

same

[@truenorthaffirmations7049]

Always improving and learning🤘🔥

[@LionheartSJZ]

Keep on this right path and you're set up for life!

[@blaykerietman6965]

Same

[@wandarimmer2128]

I am a woman. Mr. Ryan Michlen is correct. Thinking about the times I've interacted with men. It doesn't have to mean in an intimate way either. There have been times where I had to be more masculine and definitely not wanted to be it, but the man/men I was around wasn't holding his masculine energy/frame. That's exhausting for me. I understand the burnt out concept he was talking about. Than there's times, I've been around men who held their masculine energy and it's just so nice & lovely to just relax into my femininity. I love my femininity. It feels good too. I even cringed when I am around masculine females. On a more intimate level: it's a turn on to be able to just enjoy the masculine energy. It frees up my energy to enable me to be playful. That is so very much enjoyable.

[@kd7334]

Oh my freaking gosh, you absolutely nailed it! People need to find their equal yoked partner. Narcissism, Disney movies, the Hallmark channel and "reality" shows is part of today's dating and marriage problems. They create fantasies that is not sustainable in the real world.

[@VondaInWonderland]

Auuggh I started watching this channel for preparedness. I haven't found anyone that I would bother dating for over 7 years, so I do as much as I can on my own. I do really need to connect with my neighbors ♥

[@freedommeow2111]

Thank you so much for this talk, every couple needs to hear this. Seriously people pay tons of money for counseling just to come to these conclusions! I'm a 30 year old, married, mother, and you hit every nail right on the head. Granted every relationship is different, but this is a wonderful underlying guideline to follow for a truly healthy and dynamic relationship! Thank you again! 👍👍👍

[@day_dreamer_]

As a woman myself, according to the qualities in your description ;) I can confirm the segment starting at 28:25 about the feminine / masculine energy dynamic is SO TRUE!!!!!

[@themonkeyinorange9168]

This is the first time ive listened to your podcast. Always good to have reflection about where were right and where were wrong. Im gonna watch this one with my wife and discuss. Thank you

[@TeacherMom80]

Well, thank the Lord for YOU. Holy moly, this was a validating video! Number 4 has been a big problem for me -- having to wear too many hats, burning out, feeling like I'm dying from having to do so much, need relief/support so I can be the wife & mother I was raised to be. Your fraction of women listeners has increased by one -- me! I can't wait to share your channel with my four sons. Your advice/mentorship/guidance is very much needed & appreciated. Sincerely, Thank You! God be with you & yours, always. Enjoy this beautiful life! 💞🙏🏻🙋🏼‍♀️

[@BusyDadCoaching]

Oh yes man! Just needed that one 💪🥂

[@Yezarck]

Yes I'm a woman and me and my sister love your podcast and I share it with my husband. Thank you so much.

[@DavidGutierrez-nt7ov]

Great relationship advice Ryan. I completely agree with you 100%. Independence, low maintenance, no drama, femininity, ambition. Very key in finding a good woman. I appreciate it. Love the Podcast!👍

[@roseslink2000]

This is so good! You are right, I have seen and dealt with all these pitfalls!

[@angelbeast8863]

Yep. Think with your mind and your heart.

[@topdeadcenter9396]

Commenting on every video because more people need to have this information. Thank you Ryan and all of you guys out there getting better everyday. God Bless.

[@danbaumgardner1192]

Great stuff Ryan and spot on!

[@theyinprinciple6407]

I really loved this. Thank you. I found myself smiling at most of it and I love how you point out the dangers of drama and attention-seeking. I think the point about meeting a woman's parents to get an idea of her future depends on whether she has done her own healing work and can acknowledge her conditioning. Also, I felt slightly tense when you mentioned independence and her need to solve her own problems. When I am in my femininity and something has knocked me, I NEED others sometimes to bring a clearer perspective. Whether it's my mum or brother, a neighbour, a colleague, or a partner. And the act of asking for help is enormously bonding for me. I love what you say, though, about not becoming 'girlfriends' to each other. Thanks for your contribution 🙏

[@DylanCEdh]

I’m so glad I found this channel at the age of 18. My only regret is it took me so long to find it.

[@lolfirepoisonftl]

Another solid FFN episode Ryan! Got a lot of good value out of this one.

[@sweetmammabyrd3404]

I Listen to your content almost everyday! Thank you for all you put out! I was so excited to hear this!

[@lionelmajor]

Two different kinds of need. I need because I love you as apposed to I need a ride to the store, My wife got a job shortly after we got married and told me I would have to drive her to work. I said not today or ever, You need a car and a drivers license. Long story short we are together now 38 years,

[@robertviering6785]

Great advice keep up the great work your doing.

[@drazicmilosovic1065]

“Don’t be so available” ... truth!!

[@AlisaG23]

I love all these points and agree completely. Really appreciate what you do. Lots of wisdom by experience, thanks for always sharing it! I guess I am part of the 5-10% who watch your show 🙂. God bless you and your family! -Texas

[@brianberrios8755]

It’s very true brother everything your saying That’s why I love my wife so much thanks for the video 🙏👍💪

[@jarvesejoschandanaparamban2274]

Thanks 🔥. Like the information 👍🏼.

[@assiamomouctarloveitdiallo1857]

Thanks for sharing your wisdom

[@nate_shaw]

Needed this💯

[@JeremiahCRiley]

I’m preparing for marriage and this has been valuable confirmation. Thank you 🙏🏿

[@jayb9568]

Thankyou for the great advice:)

[@ryanknight6398]

Awesome, great stuff.

[@loraroyer9643]

This was a conviction/encouragement to me, thank you!!

[@Kris-mj3xr]

First video I've watched. Killer stuff. Feel like I'm doing most things right, but definitely some changes are needed as well. Thanks.

[@WorkHorse.Fabrication]

Very true , thank you

[@patrickryan5221]

What a breathe of fresh air in a world that we are told the polar opposites of what you are telling us. I'm definitely going to work on my own masculinity

[@BlueStarre_Pirates]

I subscribed to your channel awhile back, but I had forgotten why. Tonight I watched this video and your video about keeping frame. 2 great videos. But now I can tell you why I like your channel...your content aligns with me spiritually...which is an often overlooked aspect of self development as well as a spiritual dynamic in relationships. I'm grateful.

[@silent_soliliquy]

Thank you for this video.

[@angelmoreno5058]

You’re the man I support your movement I’ve thought about a lot of topics you and your guests speak about but it’s really cool that you made it into a movement and address such topics…

[@jefferytahl]

thank you!

[@rochellerolen6691]

You're right on point.

[@SavageKingz]

Great video. Thanks

[@willychay710]

Thank you for taking your time to get all these info appreciate that.

[@paulisaaksohn9179]

Great content, Ryan. You are absolutely crushing it. Just discovered your channel and I am loving it. Jocko&EC+SRS by Shawn Ryan, a bit of David Goggins thrown into the mix and then your awesome guidance is what I need to make my day. Respect and love from over here:)

[@whitesquareproject]

AHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! A GREAT VIDEO MAN!!!!!! GREAT ONE!!! THANK YOU!!! AKAAAAAL

[@CarlosSilva-jz8xm]

Thank you.

[@roostercotten988]

Wow! This is crucial information. I didn’t realize that I was looking for a girl that needs me but now that I know I want a woman, I’m looking for the right thing now!

[@DreGodwin]

So awesome 👏🏾 That masculine energy in relationship to the feminine energy. You’re great brother thank you iron sharpens iron. A lot of this reminded me of the book The Way Of The Superior Man by David Deida. Blessings keep going!

[@paullbarnett9243]

Not entirely sure how to rate and/or review these KZbin clips but this is life changing information thank you ryan for creating this podcast your website, battle plan and your book sovereignty. It's all very useful and every man and boy should pay attention

[@carlcandiano1517]

Great video

[@erinh1118]

Hi Ryan! I know this is an older video but I hope my comment can still be of some use to you (or anybody else reading this). Well, beyond just contributing to algorithmic magic So, as a woman myself, I gotta say there’s a lot of great stuff here. I especially liked the part about a man being the masculine strength in the relationship and letting the woman relax and be feminine. Plenty here we’d agree on. Where I pulled up short is the parts where you talked about things like needy women or your wife coming to you to vent-not because I think you’re entirely wrong but because I think you’re missing an important part of the picture You’re right that a woman who can’t make decisions on her own needs to address serious issues, but your advice on how to respond could prove counterproductive. When you tell a woman in one of your hypothetical scenarios to in essence “figure it out,” she likely doesn’t hear “I trust you to figure it out or learn how to,” which is what I’d hope you’re trying to show her. She very likely hears “I don’t have time for you and I don’t care about you” and feels rejected by you. Is this gonna be every woman? No, but I’d bet many of the men watching you have women in their lives who would be I think you’re right that this must be addressed so the man doesn’t get exhausted by her neediness, but you might want to look a little deeper to find what’s driving it first. Respectfully, I’d suggest looking into Attachment Theory; an anxious attachment style could be the deeper issue at play here. Adam Lane Smith and Connor Beaton have excellent content on the subject here on YT Thanks for a thought-provoking video! I’ve recently discovered your content and have enjoyed much of it so far. I appreciate what you’re trying to do to revive vital manliness in a broken world

[@lhughes6656]

Thank you for this! I'm a lady and I couldn't agree more. We exist guys, he's 100% correct 😉 might be a rare sight but we're out there. I like that both the male and female perspective is shown through these examples. I knew what I was looking for in a man but hadn't heard it put to words like this. Thanks for the clarity.

[@maverick451]

This just made me love my girlfriend even more 🤣

[@errmack3004]

Amazing video. 💹

[@markpaolino4264]

Really good podcast.

[@Socal-1776]

Wow hit the nail on the head with all but 2 .

[@datgirlsaintsational831]

you are amazing!

[@xxshamixx]

It really hit hard when you said the wife has been doing both roles and is now burnt out, therefore loves her husband but the attraction is gone. That is exactly how I feel. This helps me to know what I can ask of my husband so that we can both be more fulfilled. I appreciate his dedication to providing for our family of 6. He never complains in that regard. However I know he can have a life where he is more fulfilled as well when he takes on his role. I’m thankful he has a willingness to learn (he’s the one who shared your content). Your channel can also help me to raise my children (especially sons) since I did not grow up with a healthy example for a father.

[@MrCargill89]

As a single man, I’ve had both “maintenances”. No doubt low maintenance no drama etc is the choice to go long term. Typically leads to more reliability and more energy focused on your purpose and support w your purpose

[@dyrwtkhiehomie7887]

Brother you are a master at constructive criticism, great content!

[@Yezarck]

Now I've listened I can say I 100% agree with everything you said. I wish more men would realise this so they don't fall into these traps, and for women also its very important. Thanks again.

[@sage_n_cedar]

Great advice Ryan. Would not detract or add anything in what you said

[@graham4099]

I didn't heed this advice, but I got incredibly lucky. The advice rings true though, my woman has all these qualities.

[@Chris-nq3ri]

Totally speak truth 👏

[@raularmas317]

The one sure way I know how to foster masculinity (testosterone production) is by focusing on those hobbies, interests, or talents that I can focus on to the exclusion of everything else including an awareness of time. It's called being in "the zone".

[@ITAdmin-sh1hf]

This is great! All of your suggestions have been blacklisted by the feminist movement as being toxically masculine and emotionally unavailable. It is so natural to men and a lot of us have been made to feel inadequate and insecure for demonstrating these attributes. I can’t thank you enough for speaking up about these issues.

[@jp5419]

2" of layered frosting your face" had me rolling. Mom of 13 yrs old boy and teachhing him about these females. Love this channel.

[@ianmurphy9955]

This channel has become partly of my nightly routine now, it's damn good advice, I feel masculinity has been quelled over time it's sad

[@erwinbrubacker7488]

You are a brillant young man, my hats off to ya.

[@giljanus8262]

Many boys growing up never get this info. You've taken the burden but I feel your wielding it well.

[@austinholman16]

Good information brother. Divorced and dating again. Good time to hear this.

[@Leo86tran]

“ stay away from it…” ^^ yeah I like the way you looking at the camera and say so hahahah. Cannot agree more with what you are sharing.

[@samiammons2024]

Thank you for a good video about a good woman. From a woman. I agree.

[@ChristopherMH]

Yes

[@curlyq7382]

I have two sons who are almost adults. I am sending your videos to them.

[@TrishCanyon9]

I'm listening 🎶 😌

[@enlightenedshadow]

👏👏 Speaking as a women you are 100% correct!! I am so thankful I got incredibly lucky/blessed to marry a REAL man that has also encouraged me to be a REAL women. Keep speaking truth, men need to hear it now more then ever!

[@s0nofg0d2]

Agree! 👌

[@jfilm7466]

Dan Bacon has some really good advice too.

[@sinyamadudumundia]

@RyanMichler My girlfriend is asking if you have a channel like this for women. Or if you know of a channel similar to this for women.

[@AzazelsWings]

This is a channel for women, also. Learning what makes men, men is an important thing for ladies to know. Listening to what this man says about what guys should look for in a woman can make us become better women. Have a better relationship. Sometimes it may not be what we wanna hear, but it's what we NEED to hear.

[@Prettite.]

A similar channel for women is: RC Blakes Jr and his “Queenology” series.

[@callsignsheepdog]

Ya know Im always asking God why at 30 am I still not married and he just answered me through you and its simply "your not ready" I have said once before and Ill say it again, your work is super important for men like me who grew up fatherless and thus had to define what a man is on our own threw finding role models and men who understand at least at a higher level what masculinity is, so thank you for giving f*** ups like me a chance and never quit doing what you do and hopefully this job comes through so I can join the iron council and up my man game lol! Shalom Brother!

[@stevevos93232]

Excellent video Ryan. I just met a woman and she checks off all 5 of these traits. Thanks for the advice. I’m going to practice these ideas moving forward. How else can I make myself more attractive? At the moment we are in a long distance situation. How often should I be in contact with her? Texting? Calling?

[@Wilhelm4131]

IF you are in a long distance she is probably just seeing other men while keeping you on the back burner. If you haven't met her face to face you don't know her at all. Texting and calling is not reality. Be more attractive by improving yourself .

[@iammaximus614]

Proverbs 31….👰🏻‍♀️

[@liebherrl2599]

A great resource for females is the book “Fascinating Womanhood” My marriage has improved exponentially since I’ve applied it. I wish I’d have read it at the beginning of my marriage. Men need feminine women who have good characters.

[@spmoran4703]

That is the truth sister. I was feminist . But , it is too much hard work . And I dont hate men.

[@susannalouise6303]

I'll have to check that book out haven't heard if it before! A good one I've read is Captivating by John Eldredge, very good read

[@erwinbrubacker7488]

Bee keeping, wow. Where you find her, you blessed man.

[@inspirationforge4578]

I read to my kids, cooked for everyone, do the grocery shopping, built our deck, repaired the car, wrote devotions for our kids, stayed home 2yrs with my kids until they were in school, worked every construction trade, worked as a teacher 10yrs jr high and elementary, played pickup hockey, winter camped - walked in by snow shoe and lantern at night pulling a toboggan of supplies, went to Romania on a mission trip, supported my wife's career in computers - she is now a computer admin - hotly recruited for her current job and I bake a mean apple pie - I love my wife - she is beautiful, practical and amazing

[@stumbling]

Off topic but have you seen Gary Lamb blowing up? Would be cool to get him on for a chat.

[@jamesshelton2326]

Loved the podcast. Maybe the #1 thing should be having atleast a good start on yourself as a good man. #4 - women have to work now days so being very feminine is great only now it needs to be a partnership on feminine and masculine aspects. Both have to do more of each now days to serve the family/home. Just a thought.

[@techiindian9011]

Great talk man. I really appreciate and admire you, everything you speak is so practical and real. If someone thinks this isn't reality then go and listen to the butter talks on other podcasts! Be a man!

[@cindymorrison5]

I truly enjoy your perspective. I found it interesting that you said to look for an independent woman. It was one thing my ex-husband told me did not appreciate about me..... that I didn't need him. I told him I wanted him wasn't that more important? For him no.... :( He ended up with women who couldn't support themselves and needed his paycheck. Thank you for confirming I am ok being self sufficient. I still don't mind being called a girl. 😀

[@waynechan1670]

There is a difference between being independent and being unable to be interdependent. Ultimately, relationships have to be able cresting interdependence, not because we lack something individually, but because we can be more together. I wonder if you ex was pointing out that there was not enough interdependence in your relationship.

[@B.I.-EIO_macdonald9786]

I am this woman. Born on the 4th of July even. 😊True; But i have always questioned the “no drama” qualifier. Because life is a drama. We all get overwhelmed. We all are flawed in our own personalized ways. Who’s perfect. Hek i do not know. But i guess im almost perfect. So i thank you very much.

[@TheHuskey2222]

Not too much drama. Maybe a little bit to get the emotion you desire but not going overboard. Or if there is drama then make sure it’s to actually resolve a serious issue and actually does solve the serious issue

[@B.I.-EIO_macdonald9786]

@@TheHuskey2222 Thanks i missed the notification if your reply. I Appreciate your response.

[@blackicemeiluta4835]

Best woman I ever found was the one that was independent and how I found out she started to take care of me and my clothes I wore. Buying me new outfits. When I met her I only wore Hanes T-shirts and jeans. She showed me style. And she hustled her ass off.