When the avoidant ex QUICKLY rebounds

#reboundrelationship #breakup #divorce #heartbroken #discard #discarded #emotionallyunavailable #insecureattachment #attachment #avoidant #avoidantattachment #dating #fearfulavoidant #dismissiveavoidant #relationship #relationshipcoach #situationship

[@spiritwanderer777]

Using people to avoid self-reflexion is very immature and selfish.

[@winniecox1129]

It is.

[@taylorbee4010]

Avoidants just seem like anxious people that are bad at accountability.

[@Raggyraggz]

That's pretty much exactly what it is. Anxious = fixers, obsessing over the problem Avoidant = no problem 😊 Edit for clarity: neither are good, and one is not worse than the other. But the avoidant is more outwardly hurtful. The avoidant won't tell you how horrible the anxious person makes them feel, but that doesn't mean they aren't feeling it

[@Flufero23]

Exactly. My FA ex began the slow fade after expressing deep feelings for me. He eventually monkey branched to another to "see how it goes". Sad, since we had a mostly good four-year relationship. He wanted to remain friends. Nope. I let him go without drama. NC forever for me. I am mostly secure. Moving along with my healing journey and my life without him. So sad.

[@therocknrollcook]

Respect to you

[@Flufero23]

Thanks. Yes, self respect is everything.💕

[@Nyenae]

To "see how it goes" , so relatable, it happened for me and my FA 3 times over 2 years, it's never lasted more than 4 weeks each time though, he always find something 'wrong' with the new person and discard them at record speed.

[@terris7842]

Found out today that my ex DA is in a new relationship and has been for about 5 weeks. We only broke up 10 weeks ago after he told me he didn’t want to be in a relationship as he had too much going on and it was all too overwhelming. I’m devastated, it’s a fresh betrayal because he clearly lied to me. I hadn’t blocked him before, hoping he might come back and apologise, but you can bet he’s blocked now!

[@GodHelpMe369]

to my dear former so-called best friend, I miss you. SO MUCH. it's almost unbearable, to watch you, discreetly, from the sidelines, as you are ALWAYS with her * my replacement * out making all of your wildest dreams come true, together, and I've been left to suffer the loss of you, and the trauma of what you both did to me...

[@Flufero23]

You will recover. Pray, meditate. It happened to me. I am healing and moving on . I am happier now with the peace I found. You can do it. Sending love and prayers to you.🙏💕

[@tommobayliss]

Perfect timing. Exactly what happened with me.

[@seveneskimos3449]

within the first 30 seconds you described almost word for word what she said and that she is in a new relationship

[@GodHelpMe369]

We don’t live in a “simulation”, or at least not in the sense that it’s like a computer game. Although the computer game metaphor does provide a useful tool to understanding the nature of reality. People generally don’t understand the interplay between the phenomenological world and consciousness. They are not separate from each other, they are one and the same, two sides of the same coin. You have to understand that the phenomenological physical world wouldn’t exist without consciousness. Without a conscious perceiver, physical reality, the universe, is just information. It is the existence of consciousness that decodes that information into a perceivable reality. Much like a computer game is nothing but information on a disc, which is then decoded by the computer and presented as a world on a screen to be experienced. Another aspect to this is the issue of free will. We say we have free will, but you can’t transform yourself into a dragon and fly to Jupiter to eat pancakes with Darth Vader. So we only really have free will within certain parameters. Like the parameters of a computer game. Consider that when you play a big open world computer game, all of the millions of different choices you can make are all encoded on the disc and exist all at once. It seems like you have free will, but every decision you make is already programmed within the parameters of the game. The sum total of all existence and all reality, everything that has existed, does exist and ever will exist, exists at all times infinitely. I think the world we perceive, at the conscious level we perceive it, is a projection down to our third dimensional reality from higher dimensions, which begins at a realm of infinite information and possibility, which then projects down through multiple dimensions and becomes more refined and solid until you start getting perceivable worlds like ours. For an easy way to imagine this, you can take a three dimensional cube and use it to project a shadow of a two dimensional square. If you change the orientation of the cube, the shadow can also look like a hexagon. Nothing has changed at the three dimensional level, just the orientation. This is three dimensions projecting down into two dimensions, but now consider it going up the other way... Try and think of what a four dimensional or five dimensional cube would look like. You can’t, because we live in a three dimensional world. Just like how a being that lived in a two dimensional world wouldn’t be able to imagine what a sphere looks like. It’s not a “simulation”, it’s just the nature of the reality we live in. This is just what it does. Nothing was ever created, nothing is ever truly destroyed. Everything is an endlessly churning, recycling sea of energy and information, that produces consciousness at various levels in order to experience itself objectively.

[@hanneloredeutsch-wutschek4641]

Thank you,very important message🎉

[@Dlo661]

These individuals need therapy ! How can they be approach to seeking the help

[@spiritwanderer777]

They have to want it themselves and be open enough to some reflection, which is like finding a gold fish in a desert.

[@johndoe8923-k2d]

By typical psychology, they have to reach a point so low in their lives that they realise that the common denominator for their unhappiness/emptiness is not external in nature. Then they will turn inwards to reflect. However because avoidants literally avoid and instead find distractions to mask the pain, the chances of them ever even realising that 'low' is also extremely low. You cannot 'make' an avoidant reflect, neither can you tell them their problem, it will be met with incoherent resistance and denial. Take it from a person who has tried.

[@spiritwanderer777]

@@johndoe8923-k2d So very true, I tried too... it was like talking to a wall.

[@taylorbee4010]

She did