"White Van Karl" - XFM Compilation

A compilation of all the best bits from the XFM days highlighting the earlier White Van Karl segments in which Karl goes off on tangents when asked random questions

[@JaxonBurn]

Karl's told the Zoe Harris story in so many different ways I don't even think he himself is sure of how that relationship went.

[@nueee8878]

As many times as I've heard all of these, "ricky just feeds it CHEESE," and "that should be interesting for meatballs" just SLAY me every time!

[@jeremyc9593]

Don't forget "Man Moths?!?"

[@Andyp12]

I love how much more cheerful karl is in the old XFM days, he even chuckles a bit.

[@RT-ks2zi]

Especially in series 1

[@VegetoStevieD]

"I know but I'm using me fables"

[@jakejones9097]

Use your brain instead

[@VegetoStevieD]

Jake Jones pretty sure fables are processed in the brain

[@tylerpatbatemandurden5777]

+Khechari he meant metaphors

[@XAVIERSHIMEX]

+Khechari mindblown

[@ringbearer1420]

Tyler Pat Bateman Durden this was when Ricky was trying to teach Karl what a fable was.

[@emweeriot1081]

'That should be interesting for meatballs' 😂😂

[@Milan_Smidt]

''If the girlfriend's listening now. Go and have a wash or something.''

[@johnisntmyrealname81]

I love how it’s confusing and comes across rude when it’s probably just the first thing that came to his head

[@arfer]

I love Ricky's little moans of anticipation when he reckons Karl is about to go off on one...

[@carlhenryjr]

Love that too 😂

[@AutomaticDuck300]

Karl was thinking of Mogwai.

[@jenanahulu]

Yeah I think when they said mogli from jungle book his mind went to mogwai but they were thinking gremlins and confused him. Then he must have forget and thought gremlins lol. All were confused there.

[@ladedade23Blunticus]

+Jennifer Nahulu thank god for you two Im not the only one who got Karls thought process now I can erase my comment.

[@OzyMandias13]

It's always so annoying to me that they think he was asking about the Gremlins from the movie. It was the Mogwai of course. It sounds like Mowgli. And the fact that Ricky and Steve don't know the answer, they automatically default to the fact that Karl is just an idiot. Overall the course of their conversations, they have shown themselves to be ignorant plenty of times.

[@SamuelBlack84]

Mogwai is also the name of a post-rock band

[@MultiLiam5]

"I think Kylie will be a good looking old woman" He's not wrong

[@maximillian8607]

Botox-ed up the wazoo now

[@Burguois]

"Do you ever think it's justifiable to beat up a director if you're a major hollywood star?" "...Well it depends what he's done" Best answer ever.

[@lukemiles88]

Christopher Janes It depends if he's David O. Russell

[@jeremyc9593]

@@callum1855 What?

[@xandervampire195]

The question about Gremlins was actually fair enough and the answer Ricky and Steve pushed him towards is wrong! The creatures in Gremlins are not actually called gremlins, they're called mogwai.

[@marv5078]

Haha you're right 😂

[@smash461986]

Yeah that was annoying that Karl was right.

[@DowzerWTP72]

Yeah and Steve literally just asked him about "Mowgli" in the jungle book, which obviously sparked that thought process, from the rhyming of the words. But yeah them taking the piss then in a later episode hearing that Jane too belittled him for it. Sad really that he got put down so often

[@owentaylor4797]

You’re right! It always annoyed me how they ripped him to shreds over the virtual reality idea when it is now mainstream

[@mcwhertortk]

"If it weren't for my dad, i wouldn't be here."

[@KyrisTV]

man ... MOTHS??

[@pencert]

I find the funniest thing about these three is that Karl is the most likeable and possibly sharpest. It's as Shakespeare said, "better a witty fool, than a foolish wit."

[@McShaggswell]

Damn Karl! At it again with the white vans!

[@JordyBoothy]

Karl's a very spiritual person, I think. He's no nonsense, enjoys little things and sees past the facade.

[@VegetoStevieD]

Agreed.

[@conorscriv9386]

***** but hes fucking hilarious sometimes some of the stuff he comes out with >_< i love him meeting midgets too pahahah

[@leonfdawson]

***** Karl Pilkington is no nonsense? The guy believes everything he hears/reads.

[@VegetoStevieD]

Leon Dawson Yes, but he keeps his life simple. Don't look at the individual things he says, look at his way of being. No nonsense.

[@prince-solomon]

he's definately not a spiritual person, as he often said himself. he likes simple things...when they don't annoy him for some reason

[@kaelinjoel9328]

7:39 The things in Gremlins were called Mogwais. That’s why Karl confused the name with Mowgli.

[@DanHarrisonKing]

Drinking game: click around on the video timeline and if you hear rickys laugh, have a shot

[@NOOOOOOO0OOOOO]

Well I have alcohol poisoning now.

[@NOOOOOOO0OOOOO]

Well I have alcohol poisoning now.

[@eviola11]

With hot weather.. comes weird spiders, n that..

[@QueeferSutherland1]

Eric Viola Always "n that"

[@SarahScharnweber]

Reading the transcripts to these is like having an acid trip.

[@todddickinson3262]

Try slowing your playback speed to 75% and you’ll really get a new take on the whole show! It’s like listening to a bunch of stoned buddies talking nonsense while high as Cheech and Chong!😏😜

[@SamuelBlack84]

​@todddickinson3262 I did it, and I can practically see the smoke-filled air around them 😂

[@kt47793]

1:12:35 ( MOTH MAN!!) LOL another karl classic oh man i wish he was my friend there would never be a dull moment

[@PlumfacesamaYTP]

26:24 "...while she was off dancing and getting her hole ruined."

[@bobbyhernandez7117]

Plumface-sama and none of them caught it lmao

[@Milan_Smidt]

wait what? What was that supposed to be... Probably 'dress'. Hole in dress, dress, hole.. easy mistake.

[@LyingSecret]

@@Milan_Smidt It's a joke about a girl having her vag pounded until it's ruined, based on the hole in her dress. Double meaning and all that innit'

[@Goochbot]

"I'm using me fables!" "Use your brain instead"

[@jakejones9097]

A ship so big it had rough areas

[@Joethefro456]

Go and have a wash

[@roreo99]

Fuck off Lahey

[@lesterclaypool1]

+Jim Lahey Jesus Lahey! Did you piss yourself?

[@janpec10]

Suzanne is a lucky lucky woman.

[@conradschafman3627]

Karl says that people with the flu should work through the illness. A year later he missed work because Suzanne was out of town and he wore wet trousers.

[@Tofticus]

it always pissed me off that they both belittled karl for getting the name of the gremlins "wrong". he say's "they sounded something like mowgli".they were called "mogwai".he was exactly right but ended up looking like a tit. poor fella.

[@LyingSecret]

+Jack Morgan To be fair Ricky realises what he means later in the show and corrects himself.

[@jeremyc9593]

@@LyingSecret Yet he went on Conan and was still saying that Karl forgot what the things in Gremlins were called

[@LyingSecret]

@@jeremyc9593 Yeah because it's a funny line, though sadly Karl didn't mean it that way (as we well know), and Karl has said way funnier stuff and DID mean it.

[@prince-solomon]

1:12:52 "Manmoths" ... so this is where his odd fascination with moths and insects began

[@finlaymartin8212]

52:16 sainsburys square tins for meatballs

[@Aidxn]

Karl sounds like he's far away from the mic

[@KMEECHY]

26:23 Steve said "while she was off dancing and getting her hole ruined?" about Zoey Harris.

[@adambfmvbarker]

" and a bitta pop " hahaha awesome

[@TheBusterMan]

This is classic.The 'orse in the house,' Meatballs,'Man moths?' Brilliant.

[@Jez0]

so much comedy gold

[@sonofeast11]

I nearly died of laughter when he said Man Moths?

[@Rosvolainen]

Listened to it many times but never heard that before. Good stuff.

[@emcie3]

30:03 One of the best Karl Pilkington tangents

[@Slowshyy]

Literally an amazing hour.

[@oasis4ever92]

Listen to these while playing football manager on my day off....heaven!

[@9EricR]

thansk for putting them all together

[@PrivateAckbar]

Karl's right about just about everything and nearly always asks the right question.

[@jonathonjakobo]

AN HOUR AND 20 MINUTES?!! brb getting snacks for this one!

[@peteowen5860]

54:40 my mam told me one was that big it had rough areas on it - i just spat my drink out all over the screen, too fucking funny

[@caseyjazz7256]

The things in Gremlins were called Mogwai

[@TheMichaelKillen]

+Casey Jaszewski Yes! Thank you

[@br00t4lbreakdownzfuk]

also the name of a great band

[@orth82]

LOVE your compilations!! Keep up the good work :)

[@waqaryounis4375]

After a long ass miserable day this definitely helps

[@PawelWalentynski1]

THANK YOU!!! Thats awesome this!!

[@Chillton]

He got me drift into fantasy world with that Jack Daniel's world :D

[@ozontm]

42:35 is one of the most amazing moments of the three

[@cal1050]

"What were the things in Gremlins called?" 😂 Another classic Karl moment.

[@lukenewton2574]

It wasn't a stupid question he was thinking of mogwai

[@cal1050]

Luke Newton Wasn't that just the name of one of them though?! They as a group were called gremlins I think

[@ourmaninbuenosaires7077]

Callum Bateman No the species were called mogwai, the name of the main one in the film was Gizmo

[@TheKarate10]

Have so much work to do tonight... these three men will help (:

[@TheDarkhounds]

I love this

[@JackPhillips123]

This makes me cry!

[@PiperTMTotalWar]

16:28 Karl - "I hate this" lmao

[@RachelTurnerTurbo]

Creases me every time

[@dclawsfan4321]

Please, please put this back on the radio

[@draculon5]

I just noticed that and Pissed myself laughing! XD

[@rangerwhite7091]

"No, what i'm trying to say is".... Play a record...

[@TheWillvoss]

thank you

[@SMWfederation]

YEAH THANKS THAT WILL HELP THE PEOPLE THAT BROADCAST THIS SHOW IN THE EARLY 2000'S

[@philipbunney9445]

I’ve been waiting for the ‘what are those things in Gremlins called’? moment. ‘Oh no’

[@acx2009]

One of the great moments at 0:52:30 Steve's delivery is perfect.

[@LifeOfRy]

1:02:32 a GENUINE little joke from the Squozen One there!

[@captainredbeard7933]

For someone who's worked in radio for years, Karl doesn't know he has to be close to the mic.

[@tizzler2902]

It is true, it is called isostatic pressure. The weight of the ice forces the continental plates down, less weight from ice and they will rise as the plates are not fixed and in a perpetual flux.

[@Theinvisiblegopher]

I think Karl was thinking of Mogui when they were talking about Gremlins but he just couldn't manage to remember.

[@Navrable]

``- we just found out the people on the toboggan were on crack.''

[@ElvisLivesUpstairs]

I'd love them to do a podcast drunk. haha

[@dcmassiveable]

cutting the queen mother up OMFG i nearly pissed myself laughing

[@Acylumgaming]

Gremlins are called Mogwai in their first stage so =P to ricky and stephen

[@LosiFTW]

New subscriber!

[@lordsnow7100]

'That will be interesting for meatballs!!!' also fell on the floor.

[@SgtHydra]

Frankly, I was dissapointed it wasn't longer.

[@newmanj]

52:42 Ricky just dying

[@nathanrodgersjourno]

Going down to woolworths to pop a quid down...the memories...

[@jd9171]

love all the podcasts. The thing carl says about the iceburg in a glass of jack daniels really bothers me, how can he not get scaling.

[@tommybno3]

when does he say that??

[@jd9171]

thomas browne when they're talking about global warming

[@tommybno3]

+James Dearlove yeah I heard it after I replied, cheers mate

[@stoox006]

These are taken from the XFM radio shows. Even though I love everything these three have done, I find the radio show to be more spontaneous and purer than the podcasts.

[@localhostlimited]

Ricky recalls the Aristotle saying that 'a little knowledge is a dangerous thing' without realising that he frequently included in this group himself.

[@yurialdeadsoon9658]

Kellogs 'Space Dust'. Fucking genius!

[@jenanahulu]

What are the things in Gremlins called? Ha what a sweet laugh when he figured It out "gremlins"

[@QueenofTaterTots]

they're called Mogwai, Gremlins are just the name of the mean and defective ones

[@xdaeq2]

No no no, this was after I was born lol

[@iamtherealrenedescartes]

On the point about 2pac, influencing others to be violent with music and hip hop in general: Karl was absolutely right. It is not that violent music leads the youth culture to become violent - it is we have violent music, as a result of a violent culture and more fundamentally, we are a violent species by our nature. They tried to say the same about Porn and Playboy - Porn and things like Playboy exist because we are a horny species that love sex - not the other way round.

[@hardcorejoey88]

I love everything Karl said about the Beckhams. My view exactly.

[@boxermo26]

must see karl's will young face

[@AndyCross222]

Ricky's laugh at 20:33

[@champ19ngp]

Well happy for it bein tuesday still

[@caspar_gomez]

"the white van man in The Sun this week is Herbie Crossman from Harrow in Middlesex"..............."herbiee!"

[@italodiscorevival]

2002 eh? trip down memory lane

[@xarmy5669]

damn was bang on about kyle and jenny powel

[@TheBusterMan]

I wish they'd remaster this,so Karl is louder and Ricky is quieter.Have to keep turning the volume up and down.

[@rBennich]

use audio hijack and a compressor. i use it all the time for stuff like this.

[@0108ste]

and a trip round Kellogg's.

[@iamtherealrenedescartes]

Your words, sir.

[@Rosvolainen]

I remember one of the first shows these three made together. Ricky said he was afraid of making fun of Karl because he seemed like one of those guys who could just pick up a pen and go mental. Man, have times changed?

[@thomaselgarsmith]

The creature in Gremlins is called a Mogwai by the original seller, not gremlins.

[@HorizontalLifestyle]

Nice one bud...

[@smokinshow]

The creature's that feature in Gremlins' are called Moguai

[@TheBusterMan]

It's great to here Karl laughing!

[@outlawrob316]

But the thing is, he means the "mogwai" in Gremlins. That's why he's getting confused with mowgli. It isn't actually that stupid a mistake to make; why he's bringing it up is another issue altogether...

[@oxygennated1046]

Is there a place where i can download all of these to put on my ipod? Cant beat listeining to this at work all day lol

[@theshootinterviewman]

45:00 KARL LAUGHS!!

[@conorlovesmeful]

Both are in the movie, the Mogwai turn into gremlins later. I was just pointing out that Karl wasn't wrong, because Ifelt bad that he was obviously thinking of Mogwai but couldn't say it