Why doesn't Keir Starmer work on Fridays?

[@TheRealJoseramirez]

"....either of my families. And, there are also massive downsides" Superb.

[@jonbob2]

Just a reminder: Parliament doesn’t sit on most Fridays.

[@oliverraven]

And when it does it's usually backbench business day so senior ministers are seldom there anyway.

[@neilmachon9828]

I'm not sure that they really work any day: I remember the Peter Cook and Dudley Moore... .... sketch i would rather be a judge than a miner or the judge might say minor

[@polliebain7450]

And never on Sundays because....it's a Christian day of rest

[@billysastard8779]

Johnson didnt work any day and it wasnt a problem. What a strange change of stances from tory party isnt it?

[@andrewcharlton6080]

To be fair it was a serious problem. Arguably it might have been even worse had he bothered to turn up to work at all though

[@nattytom7777]

Your blonde Doreen did nothing for months, still got paid.

[@beammeup8458]

Chldiish reaction : no wonder productivity in this cuntry is appallingly low ...

[@Billy_Rizzle]

Reporter: This has gone a bit meta Tory dribbler: No, I asked Nick Clegg. There are no jobs there. 😂😂😂😂😂 brilliant writing there Matt

[@jeaniebottle6758]

Tories work hard filling out forms for expenses & at their second jobs.

[@jenniferhind6855]

What's the problem with someone who hopes they can make the time to have an evening meal with their family on the Weekend? the Tories just spent 14 years doing f*ck all.

[@frankshailes3205]

Boris was shagging someone else's family.

[@billlynn8256]

14 years of "weekends" I guess one could say?

[@roderickmain9697]

"Finished?" - Hopefully. "You're not even a real newsreader. Your just here to make me look bad". No they did that themselves. Good Job Matt

[@nickwalters5380]

Bless that man. The voice of sanity in this mad mad world.

[@cholten99]

The "Meta" joke made me LOL so loudly people came to see what was going on - love it!

[@ellicel]

For some reason this reminded me of Minister Jim Hacker lugging all those red boxes home each night, especially when Humphrey wanted to bury something he was doing. So in addition to kudos for the brilliant comedy of this skit, there's additional 👏👏👏👏 for bringing such pleasant comedic references to mind.

[@civiliseddisobedience3096]

Sunset on Friday is the beginning of Shabbat theJewish day of rest and family time.

[@GrahamFearnley]

Knob

[@zetectic7968]

The joke's still on us, we have to pay a year's salary to all the Tories losing their seat.

[@Phlebas192]

They get a generous double the statutory redundancy payment but it averages out at a lot less than a year's salary - eg those elected for the first time in 2019 will only get a maximum of 12 weeks pay.

[@TheRealJoseramirez]

@@Phlebas192 Boo Hoo! I feel for them. 😭😭😭😭

[@Phlebas192]

​@@TheRealJoseramirez if you want good MPs then you need to pay them at least close to what they could get outside of Parliament. OTOH if you are happy with monkeys determining the laws you have to live by then just pay them peanuts

[@HamnaTabuu]

​@@Phlebas192 indeed. The. MP's salary needs to attract all candidates, not just the wealthy. It would be interesting to make it means tested though...

[@TheRealJoseramirez]

@@Phlebas192 In my experience and I've had a great deal of it, the quality of representation we get has less to do with remuneration and more to do with the character, integrity and work ethic of the individual. Sadly, a those qualities have been in short supply for a very long time.

[@natashasawhney236]

😂😂😂 Brilliant as always.

[@maryclynch9356]

You are so clever. Much cleverer than politicians.

[@maureenharris3845]

He does work on Fridays... up till 6 pm when he goes home to observe the Jewish tradition... but as he said "if possible" not never!

[@somecontrol268]

I can’t remember a Tory minister spending much time with the family (except Gummer feeding his kids beef burgers). Can remember quite a few finding time for an affair. Or for earning a few million in their spare time.

[@davidpaterson2309]

Often the first time you saw their families was in the wake of an affair scandal when they’d wheel out the county-gel-in-pearls wife (plus little Hugo and Pippa) to stand next to the errant husband with forced smiles as he grovelled about “the continued support of my loving family at this difficult time” while she looked daggers and was clearly plotting to take him to the cleaners as soon as he was off the front page of the Express.

[@hopeforbetter382]

Boris supposedly worked every day and I wished he didn’t!!

[@speleokeir]

Apart from when he was on holiday. - which was most of the year.

[@somecontrol268]

Think he may have found time for a party or two

[@weswheel4834]

@@somecontrol268 I'm sure he found time for the ladies as well.

[@HamnaTabuu]

"worked" - definition please.

[@rosemarystewart7405]

What a life a PM leads... so many functions, so many drinks parties!

[@HamnaTabuu]

Especially for the Partying Party.

[@johnpritchard8946]

"There are so many lunches and so much admin. How do I claim the lunches back? Do I have to declare all of the lunches?" Superb and so true; this really is their top priority!

[@raithrover1976]

Does it have a bunker? It will have a few if you're heading on a golfing holiday.

[@nickthenoodle9206]

All the best Matt.

[@polliebain7450]

Brilliant as always!!! Thank you Matt 🙏

[@CityOfTinyLines]

"AND there are massive downsides" .... sniggling at that one.

[@BobGolob]

Holidays: Come to France to see the riots after far right election... as well as the Olymic Games !

[@SimonFrack]

I’ve seen so many people claim he’ll be a “part-time prime minister”. Even assuming I swallow their nonsense about him clocking off 6PM on Friday until Monday morning.l. that’s still literally full-time.

[@zora_noamflannery2548]

- I'm in the states. I get my brit news from Matt. Better than the Beeb.

[@JaneAustenAteMyCat]

The BBC is biased. I was at a march of 100,000 people in London just over a week ago and they didn't even mention it. But they ran a story about the 30,000 who turned up for Pride (which is great, yay Pride). They are determined to paint Extinction Rebellion in a negative light.

[@ncammann]

Funnier, but also more honest.

[@davidhoyle6626]

Excellent.

[@sarkybugger5009]

Albania and Finland both have a lot of bunkers, but the weather's better in Albania. Decisions.

[@t.p.mckenna]

I remember Diane Abbot observing of Nicholas Soames that on Fridays when the Commons would rise early, he'd always be in his country tweeds because he'd heading off to some aristrocratic's weekend house party.

[@Calzaki]

Can't wait to see Matt Green the opposition MP. Unless the conservatives come 3rd (I can dream!) in which case this character will have a lot of free time

[@crazydaze27]

"This has gone a bit meta" 😅😂🤣

[@Tulkash01]

Sir, lord, king, emperor… geometric progression in titles right there

[@adewhite731]

Nicely done sir, nicely done. 👏😊 👏

[@carolynwestlake7670]

Brilliant as always😊😊😊

[@djtomoy]

I don’t really work on Friday at my accountancy office, we just coast into the weekend on chill vibes.

[@JaneAustenAteMyCat]

How about one on how US politics is unironically mirroring 1930s Germany and, simultaneously, Margaret Atwood's The Handmaid's Tale?

[@debb6393]

Too scary😮

[@debb6393]

Too scary😮

[@gohumberto]

Starmer said he would like to finish at 6pm on Fridays .... not that he wouldn't work on Fridays.

[@justsayen2024]

Brilliant 👏👌👏👌

[@apsaraarts7462]

Another gem from Matt.

[@sandrafrancis3631]

Great stuff!😂 last bit made me laugh out loud again!😅 👏👍

[@moorecomedy]

Brilliant!

[@unclvinny]

The minister somehow didn't slip up and mention his mistress.

[@verttikoo2052]

So Sabbath is now woke? 😮

[@Noel-ji8nm]

No such thing as a Jewish Sabbath.

[@verttikoo2052]

@@Noel-ji8nm I didn’t say that if you read my comment.

[@Noel-ji8nm]

@@verttikoo2052 We know which country Starmer serves.

[@verttikoo2052]

You mean Fartage and Skunk works for Pootin 🥳 Like BoZo and Cameron 🥳 Oh and Lizzy and May too? 😱🥳

[@weswheel4834]

@@Noel-ji8nm When Corbyn helped usher in a huge Tory majority, was that serving this country?

[@jamesgrover2005]

Come to Hoek Van Holland🌧️ We've got bunkers!

[@Ternalin]

We really need media reform in the UK, this campaign period has shown how unprofessional and petty our media is. Anyone who calls printing things out of context or telling blatant lies in service to a political agenda "Freedom of the Press" does not know the definition of the word. This is the same media that hounds victims of horrific crimes under the guise of pretending to care.

[@matthewjohnson6886]

Nailed it 👏👍

[@Jan-lb2sf]

Brilliant as usual 👍

[@beammeup8458]

Setting an example on how to address appalling productivity levels in this country..... AN EXAMPLE OF HOW TO MAKE THEM WORSE

[@31Blaize]

Reminds me of that awful old lady they interviewed during the nursing strikes who claimed that when she was a nurse she "used to work 6, 7, 8 days a week".

[@neilmachon9828]

I love your sketches ❤

[@alexissandren1884]

"I thought we had a family friendly policy..." "The keyword is "friendly". You act like you love your family." -Scott Adams

[@nickimags1335]

Superb! 😂

[@hylen26]

Such a sad bunch of liars, the Tories.

[@wildman2012]

I used to tell my boss that if I could work a lot faster I'd have less time to make mistakes...

[@davidfoster2006]

No national emergency after 6 pm on Friday allowed then lol.

[@tamara3984]

We might be still here on Friday... Too many people can't be asked to vote

[@Agent_Pumpkin]

Where are you going on holiday this year, and does it have a bunker? 😆

[@richardtodd6559]

I wonder if that means he’ll be taking a pay cut…or is it a zero hour contract

[@MarkSmith-pr7js]

Just about sums it all up !

[@verttikoo2052]

Go to Helsinki 🎉 There are bunkers for all of the visitors too 🎉 550000 people city has nuke shelters for 900000 people 👍

[@verttikoo2052]

450000 are the visitors and those who work in Helsinki.

[@sarkybugger5009]

@@verttikoo2052 Albania has many bunkers, and it's warmer there. 😜

[@verttikoo2052]

@@sarkybugger5009 They are not nuke proof 😱

[@red.aries1444]

@@sarkybugger5009 How about a visit to Switzerland? If you're rich you also can count your money there...

[@icosiel]

Meta joke was beautiful, first laugh of the week!. Hopefully Friday will add more as long as "they who will not be named" get into opposition.

[@Anmeteor9663]

Coincidentally, I was wondering where I might go if we ended up with another right wing government? France is not looking so welcoming, nor is Holland, Italy or Germany. What hopes for a leftie political refugee from the UK?😢

[@feargal2433]

Cuba or Venezuela would be my thinking. Weather's great. 😁

[@chrysalis4126]

Spain, although it is full of English.

[@sarkybugger5009]

Portugal. And they like the English, for some reason...

[@red.aries1444]

Switzerland? They have a lot of bunkers and it's no EU member...

[@carolynwestwood6258]

Brilliant!!

[@Secretgeek2012]

I hope you do take the opportunity to have time off, you've earned it! 👍👍

[@MattGreenComedy]

I hope so too!

[@MrsMelrom]

very good

[@lawrence-k7v]

Does it have a bunker? Ha ha.

[@georgeatkinson759]

Liz Truss...work ethic😅😅😅

[@jamesbyrne9312]

Brilliant

[@petersmith9470]

Starmer, I don't like Fridays... The Doomtown rat.

[@latheofheaven1017]

Starmer wants to take that time (Friday evenings) to be with his wife at the start of Shabbat. Can you imagine anyone batting an eyelid if an MP or even a PM wanted to take Sunday mornings to go to church?

[@Welgeldiguniekalias]

If you like bunkers, visit Albania.

[@alanmansell4297]

He will be preparing Shabbat meal for his wife and kids.

[@GrahamFearnley]

Reform voter the right arm of the BNP

[@weswheel4834]

Erm, what if he was? You don't believe in freedom of religion? I forgot, Reform want to get rid of that.

[@alanmansell4297]

@@GrahamFearnley Far from it!

[@alanmansell4297]

@@weswheel4834 I wasn't, never have been, like my father did I too would man the barricades!

[@simonbamford8441]

Nice!

[@gordonmackenzie4512]

But everybody I know is holidaying in Turkey these days, at least they use the Euro 💶 ffs.

[@clarencegreen6341]

Rishi Sunak an anti smite? Surely not

[@nosuchthingasshould4175]

Let’s all holiday in Albania!

[@simonburley2692]

Seriously…… what WILL you be doing on Friday? I presume you’ll have to start studying the new lot and the media reaction to them to find ways to satirise the new set-up. How many weeks is that going to take I wonder?

[@kebabsaurusrex1601]

You forgot to add 'after 6pm'

[@MattGreenComedy]

I didn’t - it’s almost like the title is a joke

[@kebabsaurusrex1601]

@@MattGreenComedy apologies, understood

[@taranullius9221]

The debate, US SCOTUS ruling and Le Pen have really done me in this week. "Up next as the far-right is on the march etc....we ask, where are you going on holiday this year and does it have a bunker?" made me chuckle. Lifted the gloom for a moment.

[@taranullius9221]

The US part was superfluous but that's about indicative of my mental state.

[@Alfadrottning86]

good question - holiday in a non far-right country .. hmm .. Finnland maybe... but i dont speak the language. So rather Norway. I mean, i would go to Scotland, but i dont care for travelling to a complicated country.

[@jeffdingle9677]

We were lucky to get Boris Johnson to work one day week let alone a full week, when he was P.M.... LUCKY US...

[@keith2366]

Maybe things over the last 14 years would have been better if the Tories had only been on the job for 3 or 4 days a week.

[@ThoughtandMemory]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@PEdulis]

Great as always. I just don't get the constant "as the far right is on the march in France and Germany, ..." on various podcasts, news outlets, ... Is British exceptionalism so common now that everyone ignores the fact that the UK has the most far right government anywhere in Europe at the moment? No other European country banned peaceful protests, allowed ministers to use language that was condemned by holocaust survivors but then doubled down on, ...

[@PhoenixProdLLC]

🤣😂😂

[@yamadakenji4143]

That's his business when he wants interact with his family. What was shocking was when he (as a former human rights lawyer who should know better) said that Israel has the right to cut Gaza off from water and electricity

[@brew272]

To. Words Boris Johnson

[@SaveEarthPlsBeKind]

Isn't prayer day Saturday?

[@somecontrol268]

May I refer you to Friday Night Dinner channel 4 series for many years.

[@GrahamFearnley]

If you Don t like a Labour government leave the country don't think a racist like you ll be missed

[@NEALMOHANSADSANXIETY]

🙈

[@stuartmcguinness5789]

We hope Starmer gets his job in a bookshop...

[@Bop7324]

I often wondered what happened to the kids from Tots TV and then this video appeared……

[@red.aries1444]

As long as the Tories are around comedians have a lot less to work... Next week it will be much harder, you'll need to invent all your jokes by yourself. 😞

[@soylentgreen326]

Matt you’ll be banged up if you criticise Keir Stamer after Friday 🎉

[@MattGreenComedy]

I’ll take the risk. But I’ll also give him a little bit of time!

[@GrahamFearnley]

People are so thick if somebody said the world was made of cheese they d believe them

[@richardjakobek7477]

No no no. You’ve got it all wrong. It is the moon that’s made of cheese. I saw a documentary where Wallace and Grommit flew to the moon to prove it.

[@davidwuhrer6704]

​@richardjakobek7477 And the moon is the same material as the Earth, therefore …

[@mallamal5578]

What a load of bollocjs.

[@MattGreenComedy]

I'm assuming bollocjs is some sort of delicacy, in which case, thank you!

[@carolramsey6287]

He has to get to the mosque before it shuts then he has to spend the Sabbath with his wife and children, then Sunday he has Mass first thing followed by the Anglican service at the cathedral. Then he has the Hindus and Buddhists to please. It's hard work trying to curry favour votes from everyone and pretending to be someone you're not and have no true moral principles of your own.

[@MattGreenComedy]

Well done you’ve got furious about something you’ve made up in your head

[@Rob-ik3fd]

No-one likes the tories but why is this boring sneer being pushed in the algo?

[@MattGreenComedy]

Maybe because people like it and think it’s funny? Or possibly just to annoy you personally? Who knows?

[@bentilbury2002]

@@MattGreenComedy Good either way.

[@Rob-ik3fd]

@@MattGreenComedyMaybe the relentless observational snark gives dopamine hits to the dysgenic

[@iant7964]

Because he is a total waste of oxygen, lazy and a liar, part time politician that needs sacking.

[@bentilbury2002]

Is there a tinfoil shortage?

[@tinagibbs618]

😄xx

[@EeanWooo-to9kd]

He actually said he wanted to be home by 6pm on Friday to honour his wife's religious beliefs and spend time with his children. P.s. you're not funny.

[@MattGreenComedy]

It's always interesting to me when someone comments but hasn't watched the video. Or has watched it and completely missed the point. It explains a lot.