🛒 Why I Keep Buying What I Don’t Need: Decluttering My Home Décor and My Mind

[@Jeannette131]

What cured me from home decor purchasing was last year when I had to sell my mother's home because she was going into assisted living. The overwhelm and tears I cried from 68 years of their "collecting" and not throwing anything out....well I vowed I would not do that to my husband and daughter. I have been on a mission to clear out my home. (my husband has hoarder tendencies so it ain't easy! lol) The good thing about Amazon is all those boxes I saved can now hold all the Hobby Lobby crap I purchased.and will remove. I've stopped watching influencers whose homes look exactly alike. My goal is for my home to look like I just moved in and haven't fully unpacked yet! Thanks for the inspiration - I completely understand the struggle!!! Jeannette

[@The_Curated_Life]

Jeanette, I feel the same. I don’t want to leave a ton of crap for my kids to have to get rid of once I’m gone. That’s such a huge burden to place on someone. Thank you for sharing. ❤️❤️❤️

[@Sara-k6y4h]

@@The_Curated_Life Great, but if you leave them nothing it is not good either. All the poor people for countless millennia all over the world did just that, because they owned so few objects. That is no good feeling for the inheritors either. I remember decades ago, when my maternal grandmother passed away, the family had to come to an agreement, which daughter or granddaughter was going to inherit, the only possession she left - a pair of small golden earrings. They all decided that it was to go to her oldest granddaughter. It was a good decision. But it would have been nice if there was something for the others to remember her by. In our time and place we all are so saturated with material possession that now we are overreacting. Balance is what is called for. I like what you are doing. Yours is a balanced approach. Bravo!

[@annettehorn1696]

“Thinking” about an item to use in decorating brings more joy than actually taking action to do so. Exactly my problem.

[@angeladenmark3164]

Many people don't realized the pychological trauma of "caregiving & grief" have on the family members after the passing of their loved ones. I highly recommend individual counseling to deal with the issues that "decluttering" is a "side effect". Through counseling you can decide what is best for you to use this "extra time" you will have not shopping or buying items. Thank you for sharing!!!! God Bless!!!

[@cvonsutphen]

I've always enjoyed the thrill of the hunt. As I get older and have settled into a design style that suits me and my home, my hunting adventures are fewer and far between unless I am looking for something specific. For seasonal restyling, I keep it simple with a cohesive palette and rely on textiles and textures to alter the feeling. I rarely alter my "styling formula"; vignettes are modified slightly for the seasonal palette. I do love vintage that is timeless and classic. House of Valentina dropped a video today taking about the "Old Money Modern Aesthetic", to me, that fits your vibe so well. Great photo of your Mom. There's no time frame for dealing and healing from grief and trauma. As an an INFJ it takes me longer to feel stronger, and many baby steps to get there. ~ ♥~ C

[@The_Curated_Life]

I am so glad you shared your journey with me, Cindy. I love hearing how your personal style has evolved. And thank you for sharing. ❤️❤️❤️

[@lauramitchell6725]

I enjoyed that video about “Old money modern aesthetic”. I went to Hobby Lobby just once when it first opened in my city, bought some Gorilla Glue and knew that I would never return!😅😂🤣

[@dianemontgomery648]

You have so many beautiful things. When I was younger I was a huge impulse buyer. I also have a love for blue and my home reflects this. At 67 I have curated a home from mostly thrifted pieces that I simply don’t want to exchange. Because of this I have greatly reduced my shopping. I guess I’m a creature of habit. Your editing is absolutely stunning BTW.

[@The_Curated_Life]

Hey, Diane. Thank you for the compliment. And thank you for sharing. It is appreciated. ❤️❤️❤️

[@lauramitchell6725]

Diane,this could have been my post,word for word,(except that I’m 66)🤭 I totally love the sentence about curating thrifted items that you don’t want to exchange! We have downsized from 2500 square feet to 1000 and love it. So I would REALLY HAVE TO LOVE SOMETHING that I newly acquired and exchange something that I already love,because….there is just only so much space!☹️When friends want to go shopping,I think,I don’t need ANYTHING! (Unless a small appliance breaks,but even there,I have worked my way up to thrifting the best quality,so things last for years!) Something that hit me recently was some framed art and empty antique frames that are waiting to get taken care of. Because of our many windows in this home and half “open concept”( which we love in our 75 year old cottage) there is very little available wall space left. Tomorrow,I’m going to switch out frames and art ,only keeping the best because frankly from here,if we had to move, it would be to a smaller apartment for the elderly or a “home”. So what am I waiting for?😳😵‍💫

[@mangisty1007]

I really like that question “will this be a part of my donate pile in the future” ! I am similar, I am tired of doing decluttering, so I have to guard more what I bring into my space!

[@KatieSeasCards]

Bless you. This video hit home for me. I also got into thrifting when my mom's health was declining, and in the months after her death. I can relate exactly to what you said about the "calm" of the thrift store, and using thrifting to zone out of the pain for a while. It got to the point where I was thrifting almost every day after work. I am taking accountability for my actions and those choices, and trying to be more willing to feel the hurt and sadness in the future. Thrifting was the thing that kept me sane during those months. What really broke me open was standing in the garage, surrounded by stuff, and stating aloud to my husband: "I thrift shopped my way through my grief." He held me close and said "I know." Thank you for your candor and for creating this space for me to reflect.

[@briarrose3155]

Good job! I'm always here for a decluttering video. If you can steer clear of the "blue and white" items, I think you'll be fine. Even when you shift and you see similar items, I often think, "How much does she have?"😊 I have the opposite problem as you, I wait and research so long that oftentimes the sale is gone or it is out of stock. 😂

[@dianev6180]

Hurricane Helene took care of my clutter from indulging in my emotions and desires. I am looking forward to a fresh start.

[@lauramitchell6725]

☹️

[@marielucier7982]

@@dianev6180 sorry. I wish you all the best.

[@amiblack8294]

WOW-This resonated with me as one of my 2025 goals is NO SPENDING on decor items. Watching the video, I realize that I do exactly what she does, for the same reasons and wind up in the exact same place as she is now. I'm so grateful Ive come across this video because I feel I can really identify with her journey/struggle. I've already made the promise to "shop" from the items I already have instead of buying something new. Shopping has become entertainment for me and Homegoods is my guilty pleasure. Nope, make that WAS my guilty pleasure. Thank you for the push I needed to follow through on the decluttering-it's going to be a push as I have enough decor to furnish two homes, but it's necessary. It steals too much of my peace and space. Thank you again :)

[@jenniferfitzgerald1796]

This I love. Shop your home. It’s amazing how many pieces you forgot you had. Substitute the thrill of buying to the thrill of selling something you don’t want. It’s just as good of a high. Too much stuff and clutter gives me anxiety. My stepmother bought up mass stuff that was just piled around. The amount of “jewelry making stuff” filled a few trips to the thrift store donation.

[@The_Curated_Life]

Jennifer, you are so right. It’s fun to look at pieces you already own in a new way. And that’s what I need to start doing instead of wanting more. ❤️❤️❤️

[@JanetJohnson-y6z]

I was this way about jewellry. Every year I would find something expensive that I loved and felt I just had to have, and my husband would buy it for me for some special occasion. I'd wear it for a short time then get tired of it, and most of it would end up sitting in my jewellry box unworn. It took me quite a few years to realize that I can love a piece of jewellry but not have to own it. Now I'm finally able to see a beautiful piece of jewellry, admire it, acknowledge how pretty it is, and then walk on.

[@amyweaver7413]

Good luck with this important project. Clearing clutter really does clear the mind.

[@The_Curated_Life]

Amy, you are so right!!!! ❤️❤️❤️

[@crymeariver2395]

Oh, when you’re talking about buying items for a future project and not using them, you are speaking directly to me. This is my downfall!! I have a garage full of thrifted items that could be used or made into this and that but I never followed through.

[@RitaVernoy]

My mom was recently diagnosed with dementia. It’s a new and difficult experience. I appreciate your words of wisdom.

[@The_Curated_Life]

Rita, dementia is the worst! It robs the person of who they are. They call it “the long goodbye”. 😢

[@brittany16950]

Those are definitely beautiful items you are decluttering. Someone will be delighted to find those and treasure them. Think about how you are making that person’s day!

[@OrganizedWithJoy]

Hey friend, thanks so much for sharing with us so candidly. I really love your style! I love that vintage style. I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. I am sure SO many can relate to using shopping as a stress and anxiety reliever in difficult circumstances. Love all of the books! I enjoy using books to style a space! I enjoyed this video!💖

[@debracurry1423]

Hey Sherry. Love the pic of your mom. ❤️

[@The_Curated_Life]

Debra, it’s my favorite. And I love that it’s black and white. ❤️❤️❤️

[@IMOO1896]

This really speaks to me and my recent “decision”. A couple weeks ago I purchased washer and dryer, there was nothing wrong with what I was using, but they were very low grade, no features, except, wet and dry. This week I searched for a leather sofa, because the sofa I have really isnt comfortable, it’s fabric, and I’m sick of vacuuming it, so a new leather sofa I can test for comfort, and will be easy to dust. When getting prices, it hit me, my W&D was charged, the sofa would also be charged. So I had a looong talk with myself and convinced myself, pay off W&D first, then look at sofas. This is odd for me, because it’s been 5-6 years since I’ve made any significant purchases, basically any purchases, and I DONT feel, I deserve it, because of the time span. January is typically a no buy month for me,and this year, something screwery has invaded my mind set. I sure hope I can get this under control, or it’s gonna be a long year.

[@susanvelez6534]

Sweetheart make a gallery wall with all the art. I’ve seen beautifully done ones on Pinterest

[@The_Curated_Life]

I just might do that, Susan. I have so many wonderful pieces in my collection. ❤️❤️❤️

[@beckyschrage668]

I'm making a trip to Goodwill this week. To donate not to purchase. That's what I keep telling myself. It needs to be my Montra, this year. I'm a crafter, so I think I can repurpose this item or that, and there it sits. I've decided before I pick up another thrifted find, I need to use up what I have.

[@The_Curated_Life]

Becky, I am the exact same way!!! I used to do a lot of “thrift flips” so I picked up everything from the thrift store that I envisioned I could makeover and never got around to most of them. ❤️❤️❤️

[@LisaWilson-i3y]

Mine ends up in a corner of my bedroom. It's a pretty tall stack right now. I gave things in my closet, in boxes in my attic and my outside shed. I pick it up at thrift store put it away and then forget what I was going to do with it or if I even had a plan. I have no motivation to do anything with it.

[@kayscheuer9159]

Your home is always beautiful ❤

[@The_Curated_Life]

Thank you, Kay! ❤️❤️❤️

[@lauramitchell6725]

My husband and I took care of my parents for twenty four years. My mom’s last five years were spent bedridden in a hospital bed in the living room and my dad’s last five years were consumed with dementia. (They both died at home) My husband and I each gained one hundred pounds which we have yet to lose eight years later. Now I wish I had spent more time at the thrift shop,instead of emotional eating. 😖 ( although I did engage in the occasional “retail therapy”, except it was a high end consignment shop)

[@gatheringmoss5726]

What I got out of this video, more than any other decluttering video, is your strategy of gathering items in groups - vases, books, framed items, etc. - before deciding what to keep. We put off decluttering, because we know we'll have to make emotional decisions. We're overwhelmed before we even start. Starting with the simple task of grouping like items together, feels much less daunting, because it's a rote task that doesn't involve decision-making. Once the group of items are together, it would be easier to make decisions when you're taking a look at the sheer number of items you've got in each group. Deciding to keep or donate a set of glasses you've had stored away in a closet, would be easier if ALL the sets of glasses you own are in one place, in front of you. For me, staring at a group of 20ish white pottery vases, would conjure phrases such as, "SHEESH, I had no idea I had this many!" That would make it much easier to decide on my 5 favorites and donate the rest. Great strategy!

[@Stacia-ep9vr]

The blue and white mini-lamp you used to have on the coffee bar was so cute! Don't get rid of the 2 lamps--use them somewhere--maybe the sunroom with the b&w ginger jar and the 2 jardinieres you kept. Do you have another silver champagne bucket? The one on the donate pie can be used as a planter or vase, too.

[@karolhenderson8888]

You are doing great ! Keep up the good work ! Love how your sharing all this with us New subscriber

[@CherieMiller]

As I am not immortal, I try to keep my buying “stuff” to a minimum as my kids are not interested in my “stuff” and beg me to keep it to a minimum as they do not want to deal with disposing of it down the line. They are busy people, and I try to respect their wishes!!

[@The_Curated_Life]

Amen, Cherie! I totally agree. ❤️❤️❤️

[@BLANKU2]

Ohhhh Blue and white glass is my downfall other things and collections I have let go throughout my life but the blue and white is my passion. I inherited my Mother's blue onion / blue danube collection and have incorporated different patterns of blue and white like I'm selecting blue and white fabrics for a quilt. I collect blue and white carpet balls in different patterns and sizes. To me blue and white always feels calming like no planter pops more to me then the blue and white with a green.

[@CJenkins-s1o]

My grandmother would say if you still want an item after six weeks, then you must really want it.

[@janetslicer3637]

Oh! I wanted to buy those gords! What happened to them? I have the complete opposite problem with Amazon. I am overwhelmed with the selection and can't make a decision. There is too much stuff. I am not going to give you advice Sherri. You know what you are doing. Ignore those that think they have better advice. ♥️☘️

[@The_Curated_Life]

Janet, Amazon can definitely be overwhelming and since they offer so much, I can easily go down a rabbit hole. ❤️❤️❤️

[@lauramitchell6725]

Me too,I just put things in my “cart”, but in the last five years,I only went back once and bought something.

[@ourlittlegingerbreadhouse6000]

Oh wow wow this literally is a reflection of what I've gone thru and the Lord revealed to me in the end of 2024, I have been decluttering and making big changes ❤❤ all with the good Lords help thankYou Jesus

[@The_Curated_Life]

Me too! I am excited for the changes we can make in 2025. ❤️❤️❤️

[@nathanielpartoza382]

you still have a lot of stuff but one day, you'll realize that you don't need all that decor, furniture, and all of those stuff to be happy💯Because FREEDOM is the most expensive asset that money can't buy👌

[@cynthiahallberg7081]

The blue and white items will sell quickly!!

[@The_Curated_Life]

I hope so, Cynthia. Such a classic style. I just have too many. ❤️❤️❤️

[@marydumois4242]

Where are you selling your art I’m interested in some pieces.

[@The_Curated_Life]

On eBay. If you check out my second channel, I have all of my info in the description box. Thanks, Mary! ❤️❤️❤️

[@jetv1471]

For me it’s ALL ABOUT the HUNT. ,, hunting for the stuff is the high .

[@lindasmith5190]

Good girl!

[@marydumois4242]

I think going from overbuying to buying nothing for a year is unrealistic and destined to fail. Small steps and victories are better for changing behavior.

[@kristenallred2273]

@@marydumois4242 I disagree. Another source of dopamine is needed, but cold turkey can be highly effective. Shopping is an addiction for a dopamine hit, just like drugs and alcohol. And like drug and alcohol consumption, the addictive shopping behavior can either be moderated or terminated, depending on the person’s proclivity toward or success with either.

[@SimplyBeautiful516]

I agree for about 99% of us. It’s the highly unusual person whom that works for.

[@The_Curated_Life]

I don’t think I can handle a year of no-buy. So I’m just choosing certain months this year to see how well I can do. ❤️❤️❤️

[@The_Curated_Life]

Kristen, I’ve never thought of it that way. But, you’re right. I do get a huge dopamine hit when I shop online. And so far, without me doing any online shopping this month. The urge is still there but it isn’t as strong as it was last month. I’m looking forward to doing another no-buy month. ❤️❤️❤️

[@Gena777-r95]

@@The_Curated_Life It does make you feel better, but just imagine you don't have any money and don't do it for a while. When you do finally decide to shop, keep in mind all of the things you pointed out on this video. You'll find that you need less and less ❤️🌹

[@tamsheyclark6531]

I removed all apps to help me focus on a better life. 🤓💛

[@cindydean1840]

❤

[@The_Curated_Life]

❤️❤️❤️

[@lauramitchell6725]

Do you suffer from “paralysis through analysis”? Because with all of your cool stuff,I was really surprised to see only ONE THING on your mantle! I was expecting to see “Densely Packed Fancy” on every surface.🤭

[@smarterthanawaffle]

Maybe you have ADHD. I do and impulse buying is a symptom.

[@sct4040]

Cancel your Amazon membership.

[@The_Curated_Life]

❤️❤️❤️