Why “interested” men disappear and what to do about it (a powerful antidote)

[@farhiyaa4880]

Ghosting = not interested, found a new person. Return after ghosting = booty call, sex only, new relationship didnt work so returning to the faithful one (you). Never chase a Man and dont you dare take back a person that ghosts you.

[@PurpleSneakers72]

Or suffering a undiagnosed mental illness. Not everything is black or white

[@elysiyah3364]

@Farhiya And he did just that! 😒😒 f**king bastard! 😡😡

[@kimtree322]

Right. There was/is a term for this: submarining It’s pretty sickening.

[@kimtree322]

Harveydentface Yes, but very often it is part of an immature person’s game. Mental illness or disappearing due to depression is a possibility. And sometimes it may be a combination. Regardless, it’s still damaging.

[@giulietta-1555]

i was ghosted for the first time and i never felt so shitty

[@yuppers1]

Yup, if you're feeling bad and crying while in a relationship, you're not dating a man- you're dating an onion. Run!

[@breki92]

This comment sounds way too sad to me... I do love onions :'( .. so maybe I'll just pretend I haven't read your comment, 'cause it's not correctly applying to my values :))))

[@memoryrinehart]

What about if it's a roller coaster?? Negative excitement?

[@memoryrinehart]

@@breki92 l...o...l

[@LL-pt6ub]

😂😂😂😂

[@nadinetaylo3610]

WAHAHA

[@JustineMfulama]

I love the advice. Ghosting really messes with people's self-confidence and is something that truly destroys the dating culture.

[@candydcoleensarion559]

And real in love men doesn't ghost the lady they're in love with.

[@yasminazohi6560]

A real man doesnt ghost no matter if he is in love or not ;-) if he just disappears out of nowhere without explanation, then he is just a piece of sh.t :-)

[@Adam-cc9ny]

Kinda dramatic don't you think. Women do the majority of ghosting by the way, where do you think men picked up that habit? Women feel entitled to just cut off the relationship at any time for any reason with no explanation. Men expect this, why are women so surprised with something they set the example for?

[@cn1976]

Adam I don’t know about the majority but I have only been in the true dating world since Jan and I got ghosted by a man that would often tell me how amazing he thought I was and I didn’t really do or say anything! He just changed his mind! So it’s both men and women that do it

[@williewill1237]

Carebear 2006 did you give it up easy. That’s a big turn off

[@sneha1002]

1) never be afraid of losing him 2)Have a really low tolerance level to bad behaviour

[@mritam123]

Sneha Gaikwad thanks

[@zelik654]

Yesss

[@sylviab6594]

3) Be single forever

[@hannaast]

@@sylviab6594 haha true

[@shesprincessair3564]

I love it. Hope you can follow me guys. Love.

[@31Alden]

Once you feel avoided by someone, never disturb them again. (Anonymous)

[@rosabecker2823]

Interested men don't disappear plain and simple

[@duckyh9712]

Rosa Becker I was interested and still decided to disappear

[@eveheart2876]

Fact

[@EBUNNY2012]

Disagree. If a girl become too hard to get that can signal to a man that she does not want him. He leaves. She is mad. But it is her bad.

[@hibaamegrissi8843]

ducky H then u were not interested enough.

[@oteleaionutbogdan5381]

@@hibaamegrissi8843 A girl might play hard to get, the more a man is interested. Just staying in touch for attention, or to keep the man as a back up. That moment men lose interest. Happened to me recently.

[@passatboi]

Whenever this happens to me, I just watch the many videos on KZbin about people dealing with the same thing and I feel so much better.

[@FollowingJesus17]

That is exactly what I'm doing right now I thought I was doing the women that guys hit and quit it with. I thought I was the only one that they disappeared on.

[@WhisperingMeadowss]

YES 😍😍😍this man has truly made me see the light!

[@Mynameisdarkxxo]

@@FollowingJesus17 this never happened to me before, all of my hookups turned into something more except this one, it lowkey hurts ngl

[@tishataray]

Me too. ... hearing others stories make me get over it quicker .. it's sad that this is a norm tho especially with the guys who feed you interest and then ghost

[@ShonellisMusicEntertainment]

Absolutely

[@AshLey-ck4zs]

To sum up why they disappear, someone else has their attention. If that gut feeling is talking, listen to it.

[@hannahlunsford1429]

Ashley Carter yes ma’am. Soon as I confronted him about my feeling about other women he’s gone and guess what? So is that feeling 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@nihilisticbarbie]

@@hannahlunsford1429 intuition is a very powerful thing. I'm glad you listened to yours, most women just brush it off. It's there for a reason!

[@biker5719]

No it is because we didn't like the friend circle, value system or certain attitudes of the girl. We know if we confront she will justify her actions and twist the situations and make us feel guilty. So it is better to walk away from a narrow minded person.

[@annekerotterdam7499]

@JonnyC 289 Ghosting is a very sick trait of a NPD person (or psychopath) It's only about emotional en psychically abuse and manipulation. It's NOT your intuïtion but your personality disorder that's speaking. Normal people communicate instead of playing 'ghost' peek-a-boo games....

[@annekerotterdam7499]

@JonnyC 289 Exactly! To narcs (NPD) a person is just 'supply', an extension of their fake ego. Not a human being but an object.

[@takeachillpill606]

“The more you like him, the more you should be careful”. Thank you, I’ll take that advice ♥️

[@sunnysmiles8211]

So tired of emotionally immature, inconsistent, inconsiderate men. No longer interested in wasting time w these selfish jerks and future fakers. And there are just so many of them. And They are usually still emotionally involved w a previous relationship. They won’t burn the previous bridge til they have a new one, and sometimes never. This has happened to me several times!!!! Worthless, secretive and dysfunctional !!!!

[@preranadholakia1069]

@@annc7739 let the man go, sis!

[@AngJamz]

u r right on!! this might not occur to some people very good advice

[@mcmc8556]

I am sorry but fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me.

[@alexandriarobinson2513]

MC Mc sometimes the girl doesn’t do anything. If he needs space I understand but can’t u not tell me ? , if you lost interest can you not tell me ? , if you like someone else can you not tell me , if you’re going through something wether I’m your family or friends or school or busy or ANYTHING can you not tell me ?

[@alexandriarobinson2513]

MC Mc I don’t understand why guys do this

[@pearljoyrepol3699]

"Never be afraid to be without him" 😍😍 Thank you so much!

[@merlinsvdd]

Good advice, I shall heed it this year because I have done the same thing. Never be afraid to be without him. Thanks!

[@robicelus]

Pearljoy Repol you're right dear, some women prefer cats.

[@ar1079]

I did the same..then my partner became the chaser..😉

[@JustineMfulama]

Yes, never!

[@heather5926]

I needed this advice at 18. I had my son at 19 with a crazy narcissistic because I was afraid to lose him and the thought of him being with somebody else made me jealous. He was with other people behind my back anyways. Once I found out, I was out the door the same day. I just needed a substantial reason to leave for good. Ughhhhhh dear 18yo me

[@jdstep97]

"She shouldn't _threaten_ to leave. She should leave". Absolutely.

[@Missroses-c4s]

He doesn't respect you when you threat to leave, he respects you when you actually leave".

[@rosestudstrup540]

Make sure it’s really him you “love” and not the idea of being loved by him.

[@SunshineSurfsup1]

So true! Great point.

[@sta9706]

Thanks.

[@aaangelll12]

Wow.... truth!!

[@phoenixrising8007]

Good Point👌 Ask yourself is it my Ego that wants him to love me ? Or do I genuinely love him 🤔

[@Chayolis]

That might be my case, I loved the idea of having some one in nterested in me. Thanks.

[@primagiedi3775]

I aways care too much.. I’m not built for the dating scene, I really feel like I’ma be single forever

[@KanikaSharmaOfficial]

same girl same !

[@staceywalker7]

Me too

[@veamaumaka9465]

You won’t be single forever, you are going through a phase

[@mrsr003]

I feel like that too! I am the most devoted, loving, thoughtful and even subservient woman to the man I love! But I always end up somehow in a side chick position, which is never my intention! That’s not what I want! And I still end up going home alone every night! Lonely, depressed and feeling like it’s my lot in life! I want to be a beloved wife! Not his side fling!

[@Holypikemanz]

odds are you try too little and think ppl can read your mind. Maybe you "Care" but you dont show it or express it

[@yr5425]

This dude I was dating for a few weeks ghosted me a few days ago, and he was the one who was acting all in love, even leaving toothbrush,body wash and a sponge in my house, saying that his days were over and was looking for something serious ,so I just unblocked my other guys and now I just scheduled two dates this week. Thank you, next that’s how you do it.

[@mssmith8923]

Now that . Is how you do it 🔥🔥🔥👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@bonezbaaaby]

Make sure to take time to heal and for you also though too. In between guys

[@Niyasutton]

😂as u should

[@anonamous6320]

For us women there’s always another one 😉

[@heathernks8]

I mean, what is that about anyway? I just went through the same sitch! Barely knew him and he's buying groceries with me so he can stock my fridge with his favorites. ALWAYS there, but vanishes on the weekend. I'm sure he was drinking with buddies bc he has more contacts than the White House but after only 4 weeks, am I "sure", lol? Not enough to go through ghosting every weekend, haha! Dropped his stuff off last night and seeing someone else today! Guys just don't get how often we are hit on-there is always a bigger fish.😁

[@complicateddistress]

I am happy to remain single than facing immature guy who keeps ghosting us women. We deserve to be happy and if it means being single, gladly doing so

[@grace4551]

Yup! Thank God for pleasure toys...😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@taywil64A]

How are you or a modern woman going to make a man happy? Why is it his duty to make you happy, if you are not making him happy?

[@natalieboult4726]

William Taylor both should be working st making the other happy .. it must be selfless and respectful .

[@taywil64A]

@@natalieboult4726 I agree but from what I see around me women demand that they are made happy but don't reciprocate the effort as they feel it is solely their entitlement. Mutual respect, as you note, is necessary for each to be happy. otherwise, the relationship will end if each partner is not happy.

[@taywil64A]

@@AulisVaara I am not an abusive person, so whether I remain single or not makes no difference. But it is an not so pleasant insight into your state of mind. Women are the negative in domestic situations from what I see around me, perhaps they need to take accountability for their ill actions.

[@stellachinenye954]

"Never be afraid to be without him", I got that

[@maksymdudyk1718]

"Never be afraid to be without him" is like "Never be afraid to die lonely and without a family and kids"

[@maksymdudyk1718]

... and never be afraid of to be without a family, a child, a true love. Nox is wrong by telling women what they want to hear to feel better. The way out is the opposite: be afraid of being without the man you find decent. Fight for him, learn how to win and then - keep him nearby. And let your pride go to sleep, since it's not about your dignity, it's about your fullfilment as a woman - to give birth to a new life, a new destiny, to something that is bigger than your comfort, pride or security.

[@lizb4156]

@@maksymdudyk1718 Err no, we're not just about giving birth. Some of us aren't interested in that either.

[@lillyonthebeach8051]

I’ve done exactly what you said I should do. It didn’t go anywhere. Truth is the guy isn’t putting in the effort it’s not worth the effort. One thing I disagree is not communicating your wants and feelings. I’ve done that at first and it doesn’t work. I’ve been trying to fix myself after the trauma I’ve been through life in childhood and adult from people. What I’ve found out is if you can’t communicate with someone there’s no hope for a relationship to work long term. In fact everyone I know with a good healthy relationship communication is key. I had to walk away from a guy who said he didn’t know what he wanted but thought I was amazing and had feelings for me too. It was not a good situation for me emotionally. It wasn’t getting better it was getting worse. It’s awful But I learned if you can’t communicate you’ll be miserable. Plus I will never ghost someone. I give a 3 strike rule instead. If it isn’t getting better and if I can’t talk it out with you I’m out. Therapy has helped me with a lot of insight. Never do more than your part. Both parties need to be invested and able to communicate. It’s how friendships work. Look at those people with stable relationships that keep growing. Communication and both parties respect and do their parts. Never put more investment for a man if he’s not willing or expecting you to make up for injustices I’m the past or fix him. It’s not anyone else’s job to fight for you or play games. It’s a sign of immaturity. It’s simple either you can be a decent human being or not. Why complicate simple stuff. Your either interested or your not. Never try to convince someone your worth is. You deserve more respect than that. Life has much more to offer than to convince people your awesome.

[@Amy-gn6zw]

If a dude ghosts you, it’s on him, not you. Bye Felicia! 😘

[@ericaxo768]

So bye ¿ Freddy? I mean it's a guy, we shouldn't always use the feminine name when referring to a dirt bag

[@squarepeg9484]

Bye Felix!

[@intelligent429]

Amy Bye 👋🏾😁😂

[@squarepeg9484]

erica lynn it’s a famous line from a comedy film, that’s how it came to be a well known term

[@kemzi2454]

Mistake 1) 3:05 Some women base their efforts on how much they like a guy, instead of how much he likes them, putting in a 100 when you're getting 10. Antidote: 5:08 ALWAYS EXPECT TO BE RESPECTED. NEVER EVER be "AFRAID", even though unwilling, to be without him or lose him. if he's immature, not knowing what he wants, don't overcompensate to make things easy. A good man will grow to be able to meet your standards. Mistake 2) 6:51 Having a high tolerance level, sitting down dreaming of all that could be instead of all that IS. Antidote: 8:15 Lower your tolerance level for continuous, inconsiderate behavior. If you have to play hard to get or threaten to leave him so he won't disappear, it's time to disappear on him. Forget the feelings no matter how hard. He's continuously making you unhappy so girl get out of there! THEN LISTEN TO THE RECAP! 8:48 Demand your worth and standards. If he doesn't step up, boy bye! Thanks Brian!!!

[@Wikkedfit]

Interested men don’t disappear. He’s either playing games, attached or not interested. Gotta trust your gut and move on love ❤️

[@MeliannaK.]

Interested men can still play games if they are emotionally immature or have an insecure attachment style. Don't forget there are also narcissists out there

[@emlinc229]

It hurts a lot. I hate having to go through this it sucks. I feel like a walking open wound.

[@SC-li6pf]

Not necessarily the guy I was dating told me he left because he was scared of his feelings and rejection. Some people are simply just hurt and afraid

[@doglover5519]

​@@SC-li6pf I wonder if this is why he gosted me?

[@SC-li6pf]

@@doglover5519it’s possible many do not know how to handle their emotions

[@Xeniia]

I think it’s easy to spot a low effort guy, but what’s the most annoying is when they are really putting an effort in the beginning, and start varnishing later on. I would love a video on how to spot the signs of someone like that despite their effort and their hints about long term intentions)

[@kennygoodman4194]

@Ksenia Cheremisina if you aren't putting any effort in return of course he's going to walk away from you. Why would he continue to waste his time if you are just stringing him along?

[@riobrasilsambashowssambist1453]

I know bcz every minute of our time is an investment, and it makes me feel like I have wasted my time on those 3 or 4 dates

[@SaraFJones]

Ksenia Cheremisina relationships should be mutual on a day to day and week to week basis! Evaluate regularly and ensure there is balance and that you aren’t moving too far ahead by him not matching your effort. He backs off so do you. This is not a game, it’s you being kind to you both. Don’t force anyone and don’t dishonor your good stuff, yourself. Let people be, and know what you want and deserve and honor them both.

[@tysonford1613]

Interesting it's what "he did" but it takes two for a relationship. I think he realized the juice wasn't worth the squeeze.

[@tysonford1613]

@Kris 999 and I wouldn't be surprised if you own 10 cats with wanting 20+ dates. Seriously wtf?

[@thisispi1491]

The right man in his right mind will not disappear no matter how loving affectionate or real the woman gets. It is really hard or nearly impossible to screw up the right thing by simply living and being genuinely and sincerely loving. Maybe by loosing yourself - then yes. But that is usually a dating stage problem- both should take it easy in dating ... before mutual LOVE occurs.

[@eddycolon1986]

But if the woman misbehave or treat him badly in a micro level?

[@Aryeh-o]

u just got too greedy and got your greed handed back to you now u pretend to be all chivalrous

[@ashlesha21]

I blocked my ex after watching this video..

[@Holypikemanz]

so brave, you coward lol

[@ashlesha21]

@@Holypikemanz keep your assumptions to yourself..

[@amarfakhredine591]

I blocked him yesterday, high five

[@ashlesha21]

@@amarfakhredine591 great🖐️

[@dawnbriscoe7874]

Good and KEEP him blocked!

[@purechaos454]

‘Never be afraid to be without him’ Best advice I’ve heard about relationships

[@LoveLaughLin]

I was blinded by the potential and how much I was into him. Finally woke up and realised I deserve someone who appreciates me and doesn't take me for granted! Thanks for the video❤️

[@karinamorr9533]

This situation happens in my life right now. A guy was interested in me, I was in him, we chat for about 1.5 months, we went on a date, it was all good, and then red flags started showing up in his behaviour - signs of arrogance (always pointing certain things to himself like: "You are so lucky to have ME" , then lack of empathy, he would always try to shut me up when I say something emotional or touchy towards him ,he would be like " Oh, stop being so dramatic", and also making "stubborness" as his personality trait as an excuse to disrespect me in certain ways. One day when I noticed that I literally almost always start our convos, I stopped texting him 4 days ago to seeif he will text first. He didnt reach back to me. I deleted his number so I wouldnt be tempted to text him because I know thats all he waits for. Im not gonna chase anyone, I have my own dignity inside. Boy bye.

[@karinamorr9533]

(and also I love that these kind of dating advice channels exist, so you could come and just vent a bit in the comments instead of holding everything inside haha lol. Great video btw, opened my eyes even more xxx)

[@Amysbiblereads]

Sounds like my boyfriend! Urgh!

[@papoullah2087]

Karina Morr you know what my fiancé treated me like trash coz I wanted him to be responsible and focus on his future. He wouldn’t call or text me for days while he would still be in contact with his so called friends. I would be the one to message or call him always, I used to cry like crazy, had sleepless nights and whenever I would say why didn’t you call or message he would be like oh I haven’t talked to other people too, in the end it was too much for me to handle, I m glad he’s not a part of my life anymore 🙏🏻

[@tulipsbloom9532]

@@papoullah2087 it also happened to me,too😣

[@milachyc88]

He sounds like a narcissist. Stay away from those

[@Amysbiblereads]

Yes they do act strange! My boyfriend just completely ghosted me. No idea why. Now he's talking to me like we're just friends??? Urgh. I backed off. I knew my worth . Haven't got times for games! Thank you for teaching me!

[@peterchou5161]

@Empress Star ASMR How come you didn't ask him? The problem is you had a boyfriend. You need a manfriend.

[@Amysbiblereads]

@@peterchou5161 I did ask hun. He lied and lied and lied. Could never give me a straight answer.

[@peterchou5161]

@Empress Star ASMR you choose wisely. Guys like that will not respect their women. You deserve better.

[@paigehodges]

Empress Star ASMR - I’m sorry that happened to you. You’re right - you are worth more than that! Disappear off the planet to that guy! Best to you.

[@missrose5172]

Had the same childish bf ... he wouldn’t even answer why his behavior has changed, so I told him that it’s over but I’m feeling better now. And he never replied ... what a trash 🗑

[@branessakunitz]

"Immature guys scare easily."

[@heather5926]

Umm I don’t think we can even judge the 80% of divorces without knowing each individual circumstance. I don’t agree with divorce unless the person is unfaithful. Yep, I’ll be gone real quick if you step out on me as your wife. Seeyaaa 👋🏻

[@heather5926]

@Faster Master Blaster And out of the 70%, how many were cheated on? Obviously college educated would leave over a woman who depends on their husband for everything. They’re STUCK because they can’t aupoort themselves, even in horrible situations. I don’t view men as disposable, I view humanity as gravely perverted and in need of Jesus Christ. I’m single because I don’t want to be in an unhappy marriage and I catch everyone I’ve dated lying to me before it gets to marriage.

[@msb778]

@Faster Master Blaster funny women want men should give her freedom he should not interfere in her social life but they not allow men to have social life. Woman can have 2 to 3 boyfriend same time but men should not have single girl friend I m talking girl who is best friend not sex relation.

[@Evettecord]

Redfather many men will act a fool in the marriage, cheat and never file for divorce. He leaves it to the wife to do. Of course, she will as he keeps cheating or being lazy in the marriage

[@cedriccousin2766]

@@Evettecord Come on, women cheat as often as men, you just don't get caught.

[@ricebunnyproduction]

This happened to me today. I thought I was doing everything right. Didn't seem clingy, didn't give him too much signal that I'm invested in him, didn't give too much of myself away too fast. We're supposed to hangout in a couple hours but I haven't gotten a single text within these last 3 days. It's so hard dating nowadays...

[@Niyasutton]

Literally same thing jus happened to me lol

[@catchcourtcourt]

This happened to me. My friends say it’s the holidays and to give it time. I don’t want to give him time. He had this energy the first two weeks and now he’s disappeared

[@eveheart2876]

Don’t make him important too fast. 😂 let his efforts come through first.

[@ratherbenapping10]

*too

[@evab.6240]

True :(

[@uwuwestan2524]

needed this

[@kikijerrycat4378]

Can’t agree more

[@aparna907]

𝚈𝚊𝚑😝

[@stephanielit9433]

When men vanish its time for the woman to vanish too its such a waste of time. Dont come back into my life on a serious note and that's a nice way of putting it!!!!

[@tinamclendon4325]

L . No .

[@2legit2Kwit]

When a dating scenario doesn’t work out, I never sweat it. It’s better then dividing assets and selling property later on down the road. Not every one in a match. The core message is to be prepared to walk away.

[@justbehappy77777]

Forget about their existence and date someone new

[@fredpierce9610]

I dare you😂

[@preranadholakia1069]

@@fredpierce9610 a dare accepted

[@sehrishkhalid126]

Like new wouldn’t do this to you

[@teanney9836]

"when you follow they flee, when you flee they follow" simple as that.. Never chase!

[@FollowingJesus17]

But I flead and he still disappeared have not heard anything from him.

[@moxxeon]

From all these videos, I get the feeling that the only way to make it work is to just date a guy you don't really like. Think I'm just going to stay single if men can't even handle women being interested in them.

[@nutribodymilk]

my thoughts exactly

[@sweetcapricorn]

Ikr... I tried dating a man that liked me more than I , so I thought I think he was co dependent he was too clingy

[@user-182hsj]

Exactly. And I’m genuinely ok with being single now cuz I’m tired of going on dates with ppl I’m not interested in and tryna convince myself and them that I am or actually liking the guy but can’t show my genuine feelings or he’ll run

[@Eirusrevenge]

It's nothing but games and I'm too tired to play

[@Niyasutton]

@@user-182hsj girll u and me both over it

[@TheUnknownAlly]

I've actually "disappeared" on a girl because she was just not putting in any effort. She liked me on some level since she agreed to a couple dates with me, and admitted she was interested in me when I brought up her distancing issues, but she seemed to have an avoidant style and admitted to me that she had social anxiety. I'm pretty open-minded and was understanding to that, so I really worked on my end to be the more social one that tended to reach out more. She just put up too many walls though. Super difficult to schedule dates with, took literally DAYS to give me just one response to a message trying to make plans. Then to clarify an aspect of the plans, wait another 2-3 days. Then to set the day of the date, another 2-3 days of waiting. After a while, my interest fizzled out, because this is just the start of things, this was supposed to be her "best foot forward". The other thing I would say is, if you are making it too hard for the guy, he will just get tired of it and walk away. However, that is if you are actually not putting in that much effort to begin with, which is probably the minority of women on this video. Chances are, a lot of these guys who disappear are just fuck boys you are dealing with.

[@nihilisticbarbie]

Sorry to hear that. To me, it's rude what that girl was doing to you. Especially since you knew she had social anxiety and were understanding. She took advantage of that. I think women find it difficult to look within ourselves and see if it's patterns in our behavior that affects any progress of a relationship as well. No one wants to admit we have flaws that might interfere, but it's best you identify and work on those issues when you're single, so you're not projecting them onto another person. There's women out there that call themselves 'queens' but if you strip away the outer exterior, they're just as insecure and self- doubting as anyone else. It's normal, but it's better to address those underlying issues, rather than put on a mask and appear overconfident.

[@ericabelcher8760]

Sorry you went thru that. I know this is an old comment, but this video just popped up in my news feed for some strange reason! But I can definitely relate because the very last 2 guys I was talking to did this exact same thing! Such a headache! Smh 🤦‍♀️

[@domeatown]

I did that to a guy bc my gut instinct was acting up. He gave up. Found out he had a drug problem. Gut said "I'm so proud you actually listened this time." I was proud, too! So I would say there's a time and place for it. Do what feels useful!

[@stellawil]

I met someone at work. He seemed into me. He asked for my number. He texted me regularly. We went out once. He’s now pulling away. He’s still hung up on his ex. It hurts but I’m gonna move on.

[@dianaverano7878]

Thanks for the advice. Yes the guy was the one who kept on putting the effort. Then now pulled away. I actually sent a greeting message. Just short and sweet. Not " asking questions why you are pulling away" I follow this advice and make him feel that " im still here" But if doesnt message me again (ghosting), I understand. I have to let go who does not want to hold my hand and stay with me in the first place.

[@suir1828]

I think many of this men do it on purpose. They first lovebomb, then do that intermittent treatment and then you are hooked ! And then they start the on and off ghosting, which is cruel. Even a rich guy can do it. You have to see the red flags and then go into the distance. It took me a long to realize that all that was manipulation. If you are hooked, it is almost impossible to just leave. That is the problem. And even if you can do it with all your strenght, they will do the mobbing over social media with their new supply. It is awful.

[@mariabrennan72]

Man did that hit hard

[@suir1828]

@@mariabrennan72 I am very sorry you experienced this. These men are a waste of space !

[@jujai.akainu]

Women play hard to get to, that’s absolutely Manipulation. To bad, you lose at your own Game, haha. 😂🤣

[@sassyempress7916]

I don't take anything guys say seriously I only take action seriously.

[@anushkas.1168]

To any woman who feels sad that she missed out on her first love because of these mistakes -Everyone has to lose one person to learn and relate to all of this and it's okay. The new you will be worth it :) 👍

[@jaydenb8505]

Ghosting really hurt my self-confidence and gave me trust issues.. I don’t understand why people do that. Just tell the person straight up, I’m not interested or have somebody else. Like how hard is that? I’ve been hurt so much..Ive been ghosted, lied to and hurt by several (military) guys 😞 I was new in the “dating world” and didn’t know what I was getting into, just wanted the attention because I never got it before🤷‍♀️I realized they weren’t men they were boys.

[@FollowingJesus17]

Yes I know it's very painful when they use us for sex and disappear. I'm feeling it right now.

[@ericabelcher8760]

Sorry you experienced that, I know exactly what you mean!! Smh

[@MissCraig]

The ones that ghost lack emotional intelligence.

[@artsyhyd]

"Giving negative attention by complaining is still giving attention and inconsiderate men doesn't deserve any attention! Less attention will make them feel less important, immature men would leave bc they would only willing to put minimal effort to get what they want which is usually sex bc they're affraid of commited relationship." Love these words! So true!

[@memebladen3192]

If he disappeared, sadly he wasn't interested in the first place

[@cn1976]

Meme Bladen maybe but I just described my situation above! He put forth a huge effort and made his feelings for me known early. I didn’t. I did let my guard down but didn’t push or anything. He acted like he was head over heels for me and then out of nowhere, he was done! I was angry at first because I didn’t deserve it but I didn’t realize that I fell for him until he did that! It still hurts because I don’t understand it! Maybe he had a fear of me rejecting him coming out of a divorce! Who knows! I know he had a personal issue come up with finances around that time but that seems dumb to end it. Maybe his goal was to get me to fall for him. Maybe he is a narcissist and when he realized I’m a strong woman he didn’t want that because he can’t manipulate me? Who knows! I do know that 3 months later, if I see him again I will be icy as hell! I don’t need that! I met someone new and this guy is an actual grown up (even though they’re the same age!). This is more what I need! Someone stable mentally! We will see where things go with the new guy.

[@paulcooper5748]

You might of nagged him so he ran.

[@cn1976]

paul cooper nope negative! I was not in that place with him where I would do that. I’m not a needy person! I like my space so I give guys theirs! I’ve never had that happen before. He clearly has issues. The guy I dated for 3 years before him has even said to many people that I was the easiest (and not in a sexual way) woman he ever dated. I’m low pressure. I am not having any problems with men wanting to date me right now! Like I said above, I never once asked where it was going or asked for a commitment. He was the one that said he thought it was headed somewhere serious so I was following his lead! I was completely blindsided because of how he was so into it!

[@songoffools4319]

Carebear 2006 some people say what they think you want to hear. Maybe that was the case.

[@heather5926]

All the negative comments on here are from men. Hahaha I get a kick out of it.

[@susannelejonstjarna5634]

they also disappear when they aren't done with the privius often dysfunctional relationship.

[@wildreamuh1]

Susanne Lejonstjärna I know about this.. I asked him, make sure you’re done with her, apologize, start from the beginning, sift through where things went wrong... you obviously care about her.. have a good go at it again.. he said no.. but then still talked to me, and me Vice versa... then he retreated.. said he’ll get back to me when he has less doubts.. well, there is no line between us again... we are .. at least I am .. ridiculously attracted to him, he has been sensual with me via the net but I haven’t been .. because it will kill me slowly having an intimate online relationship..friendship. He said he can’t commit... I guess that’s understandable.. since we don’t even live in the same city.. but there is far too much flesh out there. My dream has to happen without my calculations .. if I have to calculate .. forget it!

[@atthecrosshealing]

Susanne Lejonstjärna literally happened to me just now. His ex showed up. And he is choosing her while ghosting me. Block button comes in handy.

[@tifawt3736]

There seem to be narcissism among males. The guy in the video never addressed that and is not calling a space a spade, he calls it immature! 😂

[@cafemisto]

this happened to me twice

[@ayorkii]

God yes

[@brianacoates7996]

Thank you. I’m mostly interested in self love--keys to staying solid no matter who comes and goes.

[@medinadjipa7661]

I found out: Women musn't be in love at all. Thank you.

[@amy-leescott6061]

Medina Djipa that’s true

[@iris916]

Only with other women

[@thefilipinojoe]

Great advice. I think it is easy to get going down the wrong track with a guy because he's onboard at first making the whole experience wonderful. When he pulls away, we go from feeling wonderful to wondering what's going on. While we may want answers and even feel we need answers, it is best to do to him as he is doing to us. We should not expect more of him, not expect him to equal us. His actions show he probably doesn't equal us.

[@malgkur]

You are great. I am 31 and finally I have "no bullshit" attitude. Weak guys run away fast when they see I won't be playing their games.

[@Herrera_70]

Same here sis!

[@tifawt3736]

When a male play games, I automatically lose interests, which is effortless for me. Lol

[@skarbuskreska]

@@redfather5342 how about you are too immature? Keep chasing after that young blood buddy, that way you are doing the ladies a favour and making space for the real men.

[@exnihilonihilfit6316]

They run away because most don't really care much for the bitchy attitude of 31 year old women. Maybe they'll tolerate it if it was a hot skinny 21 year old, but 31 yo infertile woman? Ffffffuuuck that! Forget it.

[@vault-boydan4984]

@@exnihilonihilfit6316 LMAO🤣

[@pretinhapretaopretassa948]

'Never be afraid of being without him' , thank you 😘

[@katherinemarallo3150]

Very relatable and helpful! Being ghosted isn't cool, especially in your late twenties . It' s like be a man and tell me how you really feel. plain and simple....

[@starcatcher3691]

Thatvwint happen in the early stages of dating!

[@jessicamessica2271]

also and god forbid you show that you actually like your partner. its your fault, you scared the immature sociopath with your affection and emotional needs!

[@tishavee7001]

😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@Ljounieh]

Absolutely

[@stephenridley1153]

Gay guy here! So glad I watched this vid. This is EXACTLY what is happening to me at the moment lol. I've made all of the effort. He makes all of the excuses. I am actually due to fly 2000Km to spend some time with him tomorrow (arranged a month ago), but he is "ghosting" me after an "it's not you, it's me" conversation on Skype. So THANKS A MILLION. This is about ANY relationship, not just male/female. I found it incredibly helpful. Happily, I can now spend 2 weeks having a holiday on my own in the sunshine, and go "no contact" with him ROFLMAO!

[@ItaintmeCCC]

Forget about him! It's all to easy to get caught up in the feeling of liking someone and love etc and walking around with rose tinted glasses. But if making all these excuses and it isn't you it's him crap then run a mile! He's clearly emotionally immature and you will always never know wether he's coming or going.

[@viniciusbembea]

You may not have identified what he wants. Maybe he doesn't want a relationship or he's a player.

[@leslieenoch]

I hope you had an amazing vacay!!😘

[@GlowGloomyOrchid]

Same situation here. I was willing to cross the Atlantic and spend a time together and he called it off just because and a month after he just ghosted me. The problem is that we are very good persons. And these selfish men see that and take us for granted. We deserve better! Hope you have a wonderful holiday and find someone who really cares for you x

[@jasminaloulova9202]

Good for you! Enjoy your holiday and from now on lower your tolerance level to any future BS. I would recommend at the first excuse, show your boundary, that you will not tolerate any of that and if that happens again, delete him from your life.

[@tamarasunshine386]

I did this with a last guy I dated before I met my husband. And it happened in a relationship before that. I realised that it was really me attracting that kind of guys and getting the worst out of them because of my fear to be alone. After the last BF I snapped and decided I had enough. I decided to dedicate to myself and said fuck you to everything. Funny enough, soon after I made that internal shift I met my husband.

[@carlaazuakolam1401]

“It’s time to disappear on him” I love this!

[@allanwatts8361]

u probably still single and will die alone..get a dog please

[@avaling41]

“Never be afraid to lost him.” “Make him live to your standards!”

[@valeriyaknight9103]

Very lovely. I am in situation when guy put an effort, coming, texting every day, was very affectionate and loving. And disappeared suddenly ( he is alive and everything ok with him). I can’t wait to text him to say goodbye tonight. I don’t deserve ghosting or ignoring. And thanks to all those videos I don’t even feel hurt, just getting rid of the flake :)

[@full-throttleprincess5120]

This is the best and clearest advice I have heard from the hundreds of videos I have seen. Very profound the message about the level of investing and not trying to please.

[@lystraalexander9783]

Weak guys are afraid of serious committed relationship, but as women we are to keep our head together don't let the love we have for the other blind us...if they won't go distance with you what's the point off taking a "short lift".. Some guys need growing up, an not letting there own insecurities control them...

[@RedArrow2007]

No, it's a compatibility issue! Not every relationship that starts off good will end that way! As the relationship progresses he might find a dealbreaker with her, and cannot bare the awkwardness of telling her that he feels it's over. Much like if a girl who is talking to this guy, the guy is interested but she is not so she will generally tell him she has a b/f to avoid awkwardness. Both sexes do this when they feel there is a compatibility issue. There is no easy solution to this problem. I think it can be improved and handled better.

[@priscylamello7149]

Thanks Brian. You don’t know how good its to listen to your advices. Like a best friend that says: don’t be stupid. Remember the way he treated you. Are you gonna message him ( or something like that :) ) but it is exactly like this. I enhance my self steem and make me remember that I’m a valuable woman and deserve to be a priority not an option in someone’s life

[@anaguerrerosholisticwellbe2788]

They were not interested in the 1st place! Just playing games

[@trianglebook3616]

I just feel that this internet era has also opened a pandora box....

[@membering]

Damn. I need to lower my tolerance level.

[@paigehodges]

membering - you can do it! It works!

[@YoutubeSun1]

membering durrrrr, me too and I teach sixth grade school children. 😂😂. I’m soooooo screwed. 🙃

[@stephenn77]

So many man boys out there. It’s scary! They have mommy and daddy issues clearly. So tragic!

[@angiedorman9244]

They're not even traumatized. Just scared! Lol.

[@yourname9883]

pls, way more women with daddy issues out there

[@deedontcare584]

Maybe you’re just boring

[@angier6118]

This was a painful watch for me. I have literally had my heart wrung by a man who has talked marriage, and then disappeared. Then reappeared. Then disappeared. I'm out.

[@spazchie87]

angie r that’s horrible. I can relate to a certain extent. Hope you find the love of your life very soon!

[@angier6118]

@@spazchie87 thank you for your kind words. Actually I've just decided to get on with life and let go of this trouble and drama. I don't want to waste my life with it anymore!

[@macareuxmoine]

I feel for you. Believe me, you are not alone. Let’s grow stronger together! We can do it!

[@oviya7biggboss323]

I had gone through the same thing .. 1 months back .. propose and say move on ,propose again and move on and last proposal when I said yes he came back giving excuses saying I deserve better and can’t give me happiness .. because he only will marry for the sake of marriage not having 100 % feelings with me

[@sugar_venom]

angie r this is literally my situation right now.

[@DIVIPI9]

I am done with men! Seriously done! 😂👍

[@FollowingJesus17]

Exactly I've had my heartbroken too many times and I've had a few guys sleep with me and then just disappear after sleeping with me twice.

[@DIVIPI9]

@@FollowingJesus17 the problem with some men is their ego. The don't want to admit they have done wrong and they think they are entitled to stupid and disastrous behaviours. I have one message for such creatures - walk away and keep on walking. I don't have time and energy to waste on somebody like this. A woman is worth a man who is committed and willing to look himself in the mirror realizing he isn't perfect and has to work on himself every single day. For women counts the same thing. I rather stay single my entire life than let anybody treat me like shit because I am scared to be alone. Before I ever meet someone I am alone and can handle life wonderfully. A man is a blessing not someone I would die without. Sad person is the one who treats you with no respect. How unhappy someone must be to break other people's hearts and trample their souls. Honestly? I pitty them.

[@adituirewa5862]

Me too

[@embracedchimera5886]

@@DIVIPI9 worst is when they are also religious and worship their mothers and treat women like crap. makes no sense. they are all about God and mom and seem to hate women.

[@DIVIPI9]

@@embracedchimera5886 exactly. In public they are wonderful but behind closed doors treat you like crap.

[@jaykyu1132]

Thanks for making this video. I've seen it twice now. The first time, I was in a lot of denial and I didn't want to accept the truth. I think it makes a whole world of difference when you come from a place of humility and actually want to heal.

[@GennyBroderick]

Tired of the head games. Turning 59 this year. How much more mature than that? 😂 I am usually attracted to younger men because many of them have more energy, take care of themselves, and enjoy doing things. I have had men my age or older attracted to me, but these men are looking for a care giver i.e. nurse. I don’t mind giving and be caring, but they want to be taken care of. It works both ways. Not sure where to meet men who are serious about being in a relationship. I am not desperate for love, just cautious to receive it from the right person.

[@mandyg5747]

That's me Genevieve too. ...I am 54 but our age group have in general expected their girlfriend or wife to be their unpaid maid at the same time as holding down a job and looking after all our own things such as our car and own home. They think that they are God's gift simply for working full time. I think that we were brainwashed by our mothers and grandmothers generation into thinking that this is ok...theu had less options than we do today. I am fed up of this attitude.

[@vanaphill2454]

Men our age want a nurse with a purse. I am not taking care of anyone but myself.

[@mandyg5747]

@@vanaphill2454 so true!

[@maggiefry7304]

I will turn 60 in a couple of weeks, and you ladies are describing my life.

[@ameraagao4423]

I am still 27 why do i feel like an old soul i guess i have seen this in my mother and my grandmother and I promise myself since i was young that i dont want to be like them

[@beatricet5682]

One of the better speakers. Sensible straight forward advice.

[@firenzeong317]

Spot on. Do not fall for a person based on how much you like him, it’s based on how much he wants to be with you.

[@stephlm79]

Your advice is so clear and concise.. much appreciated 🙂

[@macareuxmoine]

Great info! But what I like best is seeing you authentically engaged in raising our spirits and convinced that we deserve best - and that hits some of us at times when we ourselves don’t believe in that. Reminds me of that quote that goes somehow like „To love someone is to know the song in their hearts and sing it back to them when they have forgotten...“ Thank you so very much 🥰🥰🥰

[@ellengrace4609]

Excellent advice! I love the way you explain things. I’ve made both of these mistakes - with the same guy - but never again. Thank you!

[@domt4588]

Really needed this! Things for the last month have been amazing and he just changed overnight. I told him that I can’t play hot and cold games but I hope things are okay...he knows where to find me. I refuse to wait on him to grow up emotionally.

[@FollowingJesus17]

Did he ever contact you or come back?

[@Thejohnson2s]

Currently going through this... this triggered me. So much 😕 thank you for this tho! I appreciate you and this comment section!

[@suzea7090]

Me too

[@FollowingJesus17]

The comment section is really amazing it's almost like a group it makes us women realise that we are not the only ones that this happens to

[@chandnisethia]

If an interested man disappears then he was never intrested in the first place 🙅

[@Vanillaaxo]

Moony 87 maybe he was interested but not that much ..mens are wierd.

[@lynnmorgan1810]

Thank you Brian Knox! I have been trying to decipher exactly why guys act this way in relationships. As you discussed, there are many immature men out there that run when they are faced with being in a relationship. We cannot change these men, nor should we try to. If he truly loves you, he will come back to you no matter what. Also, NO CONTACT is my motto, because they always realize what they are missing. Thanks again!!

[@Karen-hb8ur]

This is sage advice. It’s hard to have clarity sometimes when our emotions are high. These are good navigational tools he offers. How we are in the early stages of a relationship with each other totally sets the stage for everything to follow. Better to do it right with some clarity and self-discipline than to fail yet again. Or to get out sooner rather than later if it’s just not right. It’s about caring enough about ourselves and setting boundaries for self-respect and respect of the other, despite their behavior. That way they can hopefully learn and do a little better with the next person.

[@TheConverse2]

You just described my life in last 4 months literally word for word. I made both mistakes. But starting today, I’m single and ain’t got no time for boys. 👊🏻

[@angellinegirl]

I wish there were more mature and amazing single and available men out there. Great advice in this video, thank you for posting Brian :)

[@rudy1999]

Agree. Because all the available single women are total angels from heaven.

[@lashellanderson7773]

I'm absolutely done period 😂😂😂

[@kirsten1007]

I feel the same. I feel sad. Dating a nice man 3 months now he is not making plans

[@emmanuelchukwunonso7788]

I ghosted a girl I really liked because she was controlling. When I call her she complains my background is loud so I turn everything off completely but she never considers her own background when I call. I can deal with the drama but when a woman gives me a sign that she's controlling am gone. So, I think women should at least put their ego down a bit and ask themselves what did they do wrong, if you did nothing let him go

[@EyeSpyBlackAmor]

Point blank

[@QUARTERMASTEREMI6]

Yeah, I always try every couple of months, but now… I’m so done… 😓

[@in4moon]

matching socks ? .... are the standards this low these days ?

[@mamamagere]

Standards??? There are none.

[@chrissyhove6185]

It was meant to be a figure of speech and a joke..

[@schappiness]

I thought my lack of tolerance was something I have to work on improving, but it is reassuring to know that it has worked out for me. :) Thanks.

[@mirlana3254]

Never be afraid to be without him.. Never be afraid to ever lose him..

[@justwannabehappy6735]

Especially since we don't need you

[@nono86753]

@@justwannabehappy6735 not even you mom needs nor loves you

[@marciacristinavieira3889]

Brian, we need more videos! You're the best!

[@dianemizrachi4007]

I really like the way Brian breaks down the issues and explains the solutions

[@aebglenda27]

Never be afraid without him, nice advice. Thanks!

[@LindaBell-ube]

I just bought a copy of your book "F*ck Him - Nice Girls Finish Single", after reading the first chapter I am hooked! I love your inspiring videos. The one I watched before this one made me tear up, you are amazing! Thank you.

[@ChocolateMelanin]

Excellent advice 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 I know my worth, I was not afraid when he left me, I am in a better place 👈🏾

[@VENENOSA2007]

Love makes one blind. The trick is: the more you like that person, the more carefull you should be . Always expect to be respected, regardles of how much you like that person. And never be afraid to be without that person, or lose that person. Stop having a high level of tolerance.

[@identitydesign]

Wow, great advice. Thank you. About to become a subscribers

[@katec9893]

I have a very low tolerance level for poor behaviour and I think that's why I'm single! I'm regularly horrified when I hear what other women put up with to have a man such a lying, cheating, gambling and drug use. I recently tried a dating app again and encountered a man who basically said he thought all women were cheating gold digging wh*res, another obnoxious patronising man who tried to pressure me into an immediate phonecall, a lot of men who didn't fill in their profiles properly yet acted funny if I asked them basic questions such as 'do you have any children,' and a lot of ghosters. It's depressing. I'm focusing on starting a business instead and will join sport and hobby groups to meet new people rather than use dating apps which feel like a huge waste of time.

[@yanniyangq]

Thank you for the video. I made all the mistakes you mentioned. It hurts so much. But I have had enough disappointments and resentment. I need to go back to be the same self respected, cheerful, and confident girl I used to be. Thank you for the advise.

[@andromedalynn4236]

I’m writing this to put out there that ghosting people is NOT the right way to end any relationship. It takes 2 minutes to politely say things aren’t working out can we be friends. I was talking to a guy for about 2 months & everything was fine the first month. He seemed like a god sent. I hadn’t had anything serious in years because I was very scared to let my guard down out of fear. t. I met him at a local afterhours club. I’m very outgoing & I talked to him but I was so drunk I didn’t remember much. I started getting texts the next afternoon. We hit it off texting. He asked me out & I said yes. he told me he had a disability that he didn’t think I would judge him on . I asked him if he would tell me but he wanted to Tell me in person. When I first got in his car he wasn’t talking. I got nervous. When he did talk it sounded like he had a learning disability. I became really nervous but then I realized he was deaf . I wouldn’t never judge a good man on something like that.he said he had a hard time talking to women because of it. He was ok looking. Not what you would call attractive but I found that his personality made him look amazing. He was so accepting of me & my past. ( I had a struggle with addiction & have been clean for a long long time ). We really hit it off. Talked for hours. The guards I had up fell quick as I found myself liking him to much . I hadn’t slept with anyone in 2 1/2 years because I wanted to wait for the correct man because I got tired of feeling lousy after sleeping with someone & nothing be behind it. He knew this about me & I gave myself to him. Things changed afterwards. I found myself longing to be by his side & he was always busy. ( he works very very hard ). But I knew it was also because I began to like him & I think the chase to get me was over. I don’t have a problem attracting men . I am very outgoing & am told I’m very attractive .( I don’t believe this I have low self esteem). Well we continued to talk & I tried holding his attention the best I could. I used sex. Don’t get me wrong I wanted to be with him . We sexted for hours but he never wanted to see me. I bought beautiful lingerie to try to impress him . I wanted him bad & he got further away. He asked me if I would ever go on a mountain trip with fireplace,hot tub champagne, snow on the ground ,clear skies & no clothes allowed cause he liked making memories that last. My heart melted. I’ve never experienced anything like that & I was truly in heaven at the thought. Then a few days past no text. I was officially confused. I am a talker & a deep texter & I wrote out a long text asking him if he was actually interested in me. I was super confused as to what was happening. It was an up & down roller coaster of emotions on figuring out what he felt. It took 3 days to get a response & he claimed to be very sick . We still continued to talk & sext . I tried so hard to get him liking me again . I was loosing. He still sexted with me. I wanted him bad so I messaged him demanding he see me soon & then a long confusing text apologizing for acting that way. We really had developed a connection or so I believed. During these 2 months I bore my soul to him . I fell into a deep like with him & I didn’t know how to handle it . Well that Friday I sent that apology he told me we are cool & to enjoy my night out & he would talk to me tomorrow. Well he didn’t text at all & I was waiting on him to text. Nothing. A week past & I texted him asking if he was mad & please get back. Nothing. Saturday I do it again. Nothing. Sunday I ask him please as a friend let me know what I did . Nothing, Sunday the same & nothing. Monday the same nothing & tues I left a final text saying “I hope your ok & nothing is wrong . take care”. Still nothing. I can tell they were delivered & I wasn’t blocked ( it didn’t say read but it said delivered. He doesn’t have read receipts on). Today is Wednesday & it’s been 12 days since we last spoke & I’ve been beside myself wondering what I did. I didn’t expect this. I’ve been crying non stop. I really let my guard down & now I’m emotionally naked & my heart is broken. Why ghost me? I wish he could of just said it’s not working.this isn’t something I think he would ever do . Now I don’t know what happened & I’m emotionally drained. I cannot believe the first guy I allowed in to my soul in years would ghost me like I never existed. I sit here with a broken heart . I would of been happy to keep him as a regular friend because he seemed so genuine & now he’s just up & gone without a word to say. I’m just so sad . I know i won’t hear back. I don’t want to pass him on the street & look the other way. I gave this man a piece of myself by telling him who I was for real & honest. I gave him myself after not being with a man for years. He threw me away with both hands & with nothing to say. Anyone out there considering ghosting someone please rethink it. The person your ghosting may really care for you & you could really really hurt their feelings. It takes only a few minutes to explain you don’t think things are working. Saying that would feel a lot better than saying nothing at all. Now I sit here confused, hurt , worried , sad , mad & lonely. I wish he would get back but it’s not going to happen so I gotta let go . I would of treated him so well. I accepted & embraced everything about him . He did like me at first. I could tell... the sensual things that happened were the key. Moving my hair out of my face to look at me.. the way he was made me so happy then I lost him. If I can stop one person from ghosting someone by writing this then I’ll be so happy. You never know how much you can hurt someone & you never know the friend or lover that your throwing away without a word to say. Now I gotta pick myself up & move on . I’ll always wonder why this happened but I wish him no ill will. I believe he is still that amazing man I fell in like with . He had low self confidence that I wanted to boost because I thought he was just amazing. Maybe this is his way of handling it but it’s wrong. He will always hold a piece of my heart because I gave it freely. Hopefully he dosent throw that away too. Thank you for allowing me to share my story. Stay blessed .

[@HemantKumar-id3jg]

I have no idea if you even use this account now but I just wanted to ask how you are doing? I genuinely you're doing better.

[@Acoffeewithlotta]

I'm so sorry for your pain

[@graciedg5723]

It happen to me. Omg! Everything you said is happened to me. I am so hurt right now. 😭😭😭 I just realised that he is not worth it. Not my loss. 👍🏽👍🏽

[@katiyaah6847]

Really good video Brian!!

[@authenticsophia]

This is the first video I've seen with proper self loving advice. When your used to trauma & drama is easy to stay and chase confusion. GOD bless you Brian

[@vanaphill2454]

I am without him and I feel no fear

[@michellerimba]

I have God with me.

[@healandgrow6131]

Keep it up dont go back to toxic people

[@Sugarskulls_forever]

I appreciate your sincerity and your way of explaining things so thoroughly, clearly and kindly. Thank you!

[@rowanwindsong]

Thank you Hirt! This is the best advice. Unfortunately I fell deeply deeply in love with a man who treated me like a goddess when we went out. I felt seen, I felt heard, I felt like he knew me as a person ...we laughed ...we had great conversations, but in bed he always disconnected from me and seemed to absolutely not care about my pleasure, which was completely the opposite of how he would treat me outside of the bedroom. It was very confusing. I would only get to see him on the weekends, Saturday about 4 o'clock until Sunday about the same time. He never expressed a desire to commit to me and when he said he wanted to be in a relationship, he told me years later that he never had the intention to committ to me then either. I realized after seven years of this that he was a sociopath. He figured out exactly what I wanted to get from him and then he tried to give it to me but in the bedroom he couldn't hide the lack of emotion. Sociopaths are good at playing a role, and he was very good at acting and playing the character of the perfect gentleman, but in truth, he was in it only for himself. But I made so many excuses for him over the years because of my level of attraction to him, completely denying all of the red flags that he was with me only for his convenience and his pleasure. Never again.

[@samco63]

Yes. And unfortunately narcissists and sociopaths are far more common than we realise.

[@margotmaven1052]

Needed this. Thanks, Brian.

[@avril.227]

Stop putting this all on yourself ladies. Many guys are not ready for anything real, they just want someone for instant attention or to stroke their ego. Keep being fabulous, and don’t invest so much emotionally. Even if you are married, he’s just a guy. Keep setting your standards high. I’m guilty! I give 110% into anything I like. But Brain is right. Let HIM show the effort. If you feel you are becoming too attached, pull back and open yourself up to other men or your own hobbies and goals. Keep the focus on what you love. If he doesn’t chase you he doesn’t deserve you. Who needs that drama? You are a Queen ❤️