Why Many Bisexual Men Don't Disclose

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to these songs!! I just love that Amy Winehouse was such a talented openly bisexual musician! 1st song: In My Bed 2nd song: He Can Only Hold Her
My Wishlist: www.amazon.com...
CashApp: $JRYussuf
Venmo: @JRYussuf
#bisexualmenspeak graphic created by @UppityBi on Twitter
This video discusses some of the reasons many bisexual men don't disclose their bisexual identity.
Why bisexual people don’t owe anyone disclosure of their sexuality by J.R. Yussuf
blackyouthproje...
Why I Don’t Use the Term “Straight Passing Privilege”: / why-i-dont-use-the-ter...
Curious Cat: curiouscat.me/...
My new award wining book, The Other F Word: Forgiveness has been published by Loose Moose Publishing, October 2016 and is available here: www.jryussuf.com
FREE samples of my uplifting writing: JRYussuf
Ask J.R. questions (about forgiveness) anonymously here: www.ask.fm/JRYussuf
Check out the 7 Day Mental Health Workout Plan I created here: goodmenproject...
www.JRYussuf.com
www.Twitter.com/JRYussuf
www.Facebook.com/theotherfwordbook
www.ask.fm/JRYussuf
Sign up to my official mailing list: eepurl.com/-Qacj
J.R. Yussuf is the author of The Other F Word: Forgiveness, a book for anyone who has ever struggled with forgiveness.
The Other F Word: Forgiveness uses affirmation, poetry, prose, letters, journal entries and short stories to transform the reader into someone who practices forgiveness instead of putting it off until later.

[@JustJRR]

This video discusses some of the reasons many feminine bisexual men don't disclose their bisexual identity. I created the hashtag #BisexualMenSpeak on Twitter & put together a playlist on here (+400 vids!) of various bisexual/pansexual men sharing their experiences. Please check it out: 💙💗💜 kzbin.info/aero/PLkMYxg1sLLMW4mn4oLFV-aeL3tVOhxs_w

[@SolitasRuisu]

I've spent most of my time believing I was heterosexual, and when I started to discover my bisexuality it was so confusing. Many times I felt and still feel like a fraud, as if I'm just faking it to be more accepted or something, and afraid that people will try to measure my attraction to other genders to see if I'm really bisexual or if I'm just straight and trying to trick people.

[@JustJRR]

I'm sorry to hear that you've been having a tough time but let me assure you that you're not alone and many of us have been where you are! Please continue to do your research and also be kind to yourself. 🙏🏾💙💗💜

[@brucerankin604]

Can relate entirely

[@tannerVBHC]

Yea I definitely can relate

[@afroarts9327]

Honestly, sitting w straight men as a bi men is hella awkward.

[@JustJRR]

Facts.

[@brian_Austin27]

I fell this way with women more I feel uncomfortable with girls liking me because usually girls are immediately do the most especially with their expressions

[@ggt47]

Why?

[@goonn337]

Not to me

[@GULLAHTV33]

I swear to god . I just don’t know we’re I fit in .

[@tonythegreat4275]

I'm bi, but I only like feminine looking boys, not masculine, that separates the homies from the gay lovers, but I tend to prefer girls when it comes to relationships. (OUTDATED 2022, I can be with both equally now and I am pan, I love tranz girls 😈)

[@Jaeyii-eg7sl]

Could you further explain this? Why so? It’s for personal issues that I’m tryna understand

[@tonythegreat4275]

@@Jaeyii-eg7sl trying to understand what?

[@BradyGalloway]

@@Jaeyii-eg7sl yes what he said

[@jesseelliot4804]

I like women way more than men because they’re just sexier in my opinion no man can have the shape like a woman and wear sexy clothes like them either. I’m not even attracted to guys physically unless I’m in the mood to fuck. I could fuck guys all my life but I would never marry or be intimate with a guy in a relationship. Plus I want kids so yeah girls are better.

[@tonythegreat4275]

@@SoChillExplores he likes men too? Or he likes men only? Is he gay or is he bisexual? If he's gay that's fu**d up to be in a relationship with you.

[@kaykaylove3045]

As a bi woman who loves bi men this makes me really sad. I think for man masculinity and heterosexuality are seen as one and the same(as in being bi or gay makes you feminine). As in you're viewed as " less of a man" if you're not straight. Women and Men are socialized into this very homophobic and patriarchal mindset from a very young age. Bi women's sexuality is fetishized and trivialized for a similar reason. They don't view two women together as "real sex" or "real love".

[@JustJRR]

Exactly. It's heartbreaking and can be suffocating. A lot of us are doing the work to change this but society needs to shift drastically.

[@JustJRR]

@@asdf1991asdf okay.

[@LeroyThompson462]

Very true Kaykay

[@vincentalakija5515]

@Fox Freeman, How does getting married to a woman demasculate you?

[@MixedRogueKhorri]

@Fox Freeman that makes zero sense 😂

[@TENOVISION]

I’m so glad I’m not the only one, but I heard Amy Winehouse in the background and I just had to stan. 💕

[@JustJRR]

You're not alone bro 🙏🏾💙💗💜 Also Amy is the G.O.A.T.!!! RIP

[@LeroyThompson462]

Yes Teno, I'm glad I'm not the only one as well

[@cadas2366]

I’ve only told close friends about my sexuality. I don’t act gay or feminine in any way I’ve just had the attraction to both for a long time. I don’t tell people simply from the perspective of being treated different, not in a homophobic way just like when they look at me it’s something they’d always think of in regards to me. Hence why I only told close friends where that wouldn’t happen, this likely sounds fairly petty but it’s just what I want to do, I mostly don’t care what people think about me I just don’t want to be categorised by my sexuality

[@JustJRR]

I hear you bro. Most people want others to get to know them for who they are, not their sexuality.

[@LeroyThompson462]

True

[@slimc8749]

Ugh I’m newly bisexual well I’m at the part where I’m embracing it. I needed this resource! Thank You for speaking on our narrative!!

[@JustJRR]

No problem!! Thanks for watching and commenting. Please check out my playlist & hashtag called #BisexualMenSpeak 🙏🏾 kzbin.info/aero/PLkMYxg1sLLMW4mn4oLFV-aeL3tVOhxs_w

[@HartHeart]

I know this is an old video at this point but as a bi man who only came out to myself and a few close friends less than 6 months ago I feel so seen in this video, thank you for this

[@atunabarket2237]

I get relief from this video because i would feel a man really loved me if he admitted he chosen me over other women and men. This video answers a lot of unspoken feelings i have.

[@JustJRR]

Thanks for your support 🙏🏾

[@LeroyThompson462]

Yes it does answer a lot of questions questions that I was internalising because I was afraid to inquire

[@mariyatakeuchi9009]

Got more love from my hyper masculine straight friends than any lgbt people I met

[@JustJRR]

:)

[@mariyatakeuchi9009]

Just J.R. You seem cool though I mess with you tho

[@JustJRR]

@@mariyatakeuchi9009 thanks 😊 check out some of my other videos 🙏🏾

[@TigerPrawn_]

So true about bi's feeling homophobia and biphobia not only reduced homophobia. So clearly explained!

[@JustJRR]

Many people don't understand this because they do not see bisexuality as it's own legitimate sexuality with it's own challenges that sometimes overlap with gay and lesbian people but not always.

[@len1045678]

@@JustJRR yes my friend told me theres no such thing as bi in guys only in woman cause they eventually need a man bla bla and they was built to take man 🙄

[@yun-hn5cx]

@@JustJRR but they don’t see homosexuality as its own real sexual orientation. It’s always seen as a symptom or secondary trait from something negative that can be changed like everybody is originally het and then somehow it changed which is bogus in any iteration of the rethoric.

[@davesantorinirey157]

Why do bisexual men mostly end up in a long term relationship with women rather than men?

[@Rebecca.xoxoxo]

Question that needs an answer!!!

[@elicordero4019]

I thought it was the other way around.

[@alinachrist8416]

Simply because there are more straight women than gay/bi men. Very similar to how most bi women will end up with a straight guy. Just a higher probability of finding someone of the opp sex.

[@miruonlive]

I found this video today, but I still wanna comment something: I'm a bi woman, that all the people that I dated were bi mans (3). Out of them, all were closeted, and I tried to encourage them and give them support and help them to feel "free". But, sadly, 2 of the 3 relationships ended because they wanted to date guys to feel "more part of the comunity", and I felt so bad for them, because they started to fake who they were, and that's sad (the other guy is a bestie tho). Also, as a bi woman, all the straight people that I met, accept me for who I am, and don't even ask the uncomfy questions, even my parents were surprisingly supportive. But yet, all the lesbians that I met in my life, and wanted to be my friend/or I was interested romanticly in them, when I told them I was bi, all stopped talking with me, even some blocked me.

[@s.s.ss.4848]

Feels good to know that I'm not the only bi wan that has had better experiences with straight ppl. Comes to show that bi men are not the angels that everyone tries to proclaim them to be.

[@Carlinisalive]

I'm bi and personally I'm attracted to femininity so I've always dated fem guys and women and whenever I tell someone that they look at me like I'm weird even in the LGBT community

[@JustJRR]

Yea I knownwhat you mean. The societal standard for what is acceptable and desirable in men is for men to be masculine so I can see why it might turn heads. Thanks for your comment please subscribe 🙏🏾😀

[@2sidesofthesamecoin]

Hey JR❤❤ Great Content and Great to see you boo

[@JustJRR]

Thanks Danny!!! 💙💗💗

[@PettyLabelle]

Just found out the man I loved is bi . He wasn’t cheating on me but he didn’t tell me either . I’m crushed more so because I just want him Happy

[@markg6976]

This was the reason I went back in the closet bc of the biphobia everyone seems to have. But as I got over it I stopped giving a shit what others thought bc idc I know I'm a bi man. And I felt like I should be out not only for myself but for my fellow bisexuals. Bc we shouldn't let the world define us or shame us for what we can't control. Plus we need more bisexuals talking about these issues.

[@JustJRR]

thanks for your comment Mark!! I know exactly what you mean and I'm glad you've come to a much better place with how you see yourself and bivisibility.

[@JustJRR]

Please subscribe :)

[@LeroyThompson462]

Mark, I understand where you are coming from, but don't be afraid to reach out

[@mr.malveaux3961]

Me and my straight guy best friend had sexual Intercourse does that make him BI?

[@GULLAHTV33]

I most definitely don’t care if people know I’m bi . Afro punk helped me with that a lot .

[@Vann20F]

If you hanging out in a setting and they asking how you get down you in the wrong crowd

[@markrichardsmith88]

Great video. Thank you for speaking about this. You are unique and only you get to decide when and where you’re comfortable disclosing. I hope that we all feel more and more comfortable as strong in educating the world. This video is a great step.

[@JustJRR]

Thanks so much Mark. That means a lot to me 🙏🏾💙💗💜

[@claudiabenigno2796]

I'm a transwoman, and I'm open to dating a Bi man. But my fear is they would want to marry a ciswoman because they wanna have kids, which I can't give. I've had experiences when a guy I dated said he wanted kids. I'm insecure, I know, but I wanna open my mind and educate myself.

[@themadrose4334]

A lot of cis men and women have no interest in kids, it's becoming a lot more prevalent these days so I have hope you will meet a great guy who will love you for you :)

[@claudiabenigno2796]

@@themadrose4334 Thank you. Appreciate those words.

[@AW-zv2to]

@@claudiabenigno2796 www.statnews.com/2019/06/05/creating-eggs-sperm-stem-cells/ This will probably be out within the next 20 years so hopefully we’ll be able to have biological kids in lgbt relationships

[@claudiabenigno2796]

@@AW-zv2to The problem is, I don't want kids. Many bisexuals I know leave their same-sex partners solely on the fact they want kids, and I don't. I've experienced that before as well, and I don't want to be caught in that drama. My other issue is that some of them still want p*ssy, and the biggest slap on the face for is if they leave me for a ciswoman.

[@hy3na739]

@@claudiabenigno2796 polyamory would solve many of these issues... just sayin :)

[@LeroyThompson462]

Thanks so much Just JR for explaining, clarifying and being real, it is so refreshing and enlightening to hear this

[@JustJRR]

You are very welcome. Thanks for all your support!

[@khemanig2]

I just had a really close friend softly ask if I still identify as Bi now that I've been in a relationship with another man for a year saying "well you know people change how they identify." This person is a Bi woman and it was really uncomfortable. I had to track down this video to get some reaffirmation so thank you!

[@JustJRR]

Hey there, I'm so sorry to hear about this, that really sucks coming from another bi person, ya know? I actually plan to make a video very soon about bi women who find bi men disgusting/not "really" bi so please subscribe and look out for it 🙌🏾💙💗💜

[@steviebrewton3386]

But if u say people change how they identify then a lot of straight people will say see that's proof u can change it is a choice I mean some straight people think and say that anyway but that will make them think that's proof so sometimes we have to be careful how we say things because a lot of straight people will use that against us in the LGBTQ + community.

[@sanandreas818]

Why would she even say that. Did she assume that only female bisexuality was the legitimats one and not vice versa?

[@kaykaylove3045]

@@sanandreas818 As a bi woman who loves bi men this makes me really sad. I think for man masculinity and heterosexuality are seen as one and the same(as in being bi or gay makes you feminie) . As in you're viewed as " less of a man" if you're not straight. Women and Men are socialized into this very homophobic and patriarchal mindset from a very young age. Bi women's sexuality is fetishized and trivialized for a similar reason. They don't view two women together as "real sex" or "real love" as long as there's not a man involved in the sex act or relationship.

[@iknowyouwanttofly]

@@JustJRR I used to be a bi girl afraid of bi men. Still I sometimes catch myself thinking stuff like that sometimes. How do I unlearn it? The strange thing is most straight guys I dated have had some sexual experiences with other men and I liked that so it makes it even stranger. Ps for me I think it started when I was younger and listened to dan savage stuff and some kind of bad science stuff. And when I have dated men that was a little bit feminine people keep warning me that they are secretly gay and it really scares me

[@erwanmusic2191]

im a fem gay , quiet aesthetically feminine in a genuine natural way since im natrually that way .. with an artsy touch since im musician .. ive had of course gay bfs they were amazing even when we broke up we remained friends ,, but tbh when i dated bisexual men it was a mess .. no hate but honestly they all tried to talk to me first .. tried so hard to convince me into dating them etc etc so i was like ill be biphobic if i refuse to date these bi men especially that they were quiet hot .. anyway i explained them all too well that i was gay gay and moogamous etc they were like okay with it they but none of them stayed .. the first one cheated 5 times with 5 girls ... the second time 2 years after that relationship another bi guy wanted to date me i met him in a club he was like down to earth hot same told him listen i already had a bi guy before not really for me he said dont be biphobic dont be this dont be that lets try please gave him a chance was like not all bi men are the same since even us gays cheat even straight women and men cheat .. so why not give a chnce to another bi men okay ccool 2 months into the relationship he told me can we add girl once a month three way thingy etc iwas like hell nah told ya im gay and monogamous broke up with him instantly he came back running crying sorry sorry baby please never even looked at his face back i dont care . same with the last bi guy i dated a year after him this one lied told me hes an ex bi now gay etc so i was like green light gay now hes past is his past he lied he was still bi one time he forgot his phone with me thought a co worker called him i was about to say ill reach him now to give him his phone he forgot it and nah i hear a females voice thanks for last night baby me and my gf had fun ... mister was having threesomes with bi girls .. anyway gave him back his phone told him bye with no reasons no explanations .. later on thousands of sorries babies come back sorry i love you nah nah nah i made him suffer he even cried got depressed not a word .. our issie isnt your sexuality you guys are valid your sexuality is valid .. youu guys are not more eager to cheat than gays or straights okay however the issue is the constant inconsistency in feelings and attraction for someone and the strong heternormativity among bisexuals is really even higher than some straight people i swear .. it hurts as a 100 percent gay i see and sense their heteronormativity in everything every step they take at least a good portion of bis .. i mean check grindr its full of guys misleading younger gays .. its full of married bi men treating young gays as sexual peasants and leaving them for women later if not already married with kids . i have many bi friends their my big brothers we can go together to gay prides etc etc we can be real good friends we a re a family of lgbtq people however to date one no ... ever again just gays for me and im much happier with my gays tbh the pain and hurt that happens when a bi dates a gay is beyond compare you guys cant feel it only if youre gay gay like us now do you boo you guys can date bi people like you are pan people straight open minded people you guys have a better and wider dating pool cheer up be happy you are all valid beautiful and yall matter in the community any non straight is welcome in our community lgbtq for life however not dating them or smth is more about preference not phisically speaking more like the lifestyle and diff attractions make us a bit incompatible . xoxo happy pride other than that

[@V_kim1996]

Ohh I feel bad for you...are you living a happy life now...?

[@claudiabenigno2796]

Ugh… I hate it when a guy cheats on me, but the pain is much more intense when he cheats on a ciswoman (I'm Trans), so I may be open to dating Bi men, but it'll take more trust for me to be comfortable.(I had exp of this, so I'm quite insecure)

[@V_kim1996]

@@claudiabenigno2796 share your experience now..I wanna know.. hehe😅

[@claudiabenigno2796]

@@V_kim1996 I dated a guy who was into me before (I wasn't Trans at the time and identified as a man). We were so in love, but didn't work out because he still wanted women more, and he wanted a family (I don't want kids). Another is a Grindr hookup, who met up with me and after we did it, I found out he was a husband and a father. I felt violated after I left his house. It's like I wasn't good enough. The cherry on top was when I chatted with another guy on Grindr back in 2018. I wasn't Trans yet at the time. He was hot, but he mentioned he had a GF. I told him I don't want to be a 3rd party. Two years later, we matched on another dating app. He said he was into me, but then asked if I was femme. I said "Yes, and I plan to transition". He ghosted me. To make long story short, I have reservations with Bi guys more than straight men, as a Transwoman. I feel like I need to compete with a lot, and that's an insecurity I had because of those experience. Hearing other horror stories from other gay men just adds to the horror.

[@V_kim1996]

@@claudiabenigno2796 Thank you for sharing it..😊

[@dontdomeboo81]

as a full-blown straight woman I don't care if a man is bisexual or not as long as he is masculine. I actually enjoy masculine man on man action aswell

[@RockiesCanada]

👀 You could've kept that last part to yourself honey 🤣🤣🤣

[@Robert-vf6ny]

I am a genuinely butch guy, and am now out to the world as a proud bisexual dude. I'm hoping to find a bi gf by advertising on clothing I made! It's quite explicit(non sexual) just explicit that I'm bi, I was born this way, and I'm masculine and proud.

[@johnittawilliams8937]

I love bisexual men. I enjoy being able to share so much together. I'm so much more comfortable we both understand enjoying both sexes. I don't feel judged and we're able to embrace our true sexual selves.

[@notdefining]

I love your account. You were one of the first bi activists I saw when I was struggling to come to terms with my identity. You helped me a lot. Now I have a platform of my own. How can I support you? I’m going to tweet out your videos.

[@JustJRR]

Aw omg I'm glad my videos helped you, man!! If you could use my hashtag #BisexualMenSpeak on tweets, KZbin and IG whenever you talk about bisexuality and share my content, that'd be great 👍🏾😊 my CashApp is $JRYussuf and my Venmo is @JRYussuf 🙏🏾

[@Patricruss]

I'm bi, but I prefer masculine men and feminine women.... Is anyone else like that?

[@JustJRR]

Definitely! Especially when I was first aware of my sexuality. As I've gained experience my preferences change.

[@Patricruss]

@@JustJRR Ah, I see! Thank you!

[@JustJRR]

@@Patricruss no problem! Thanks for watching 😀

[@LeroyThompson462]

Same here

[@kbmacaroni1627]

This is the story of my life but I feel like my gay friends don't see me as being bisexual , it's just so hard like I tried being friends with straight guys but then they get bullied or become possessive or just plan out become distant 😂 .okay maybe at this point I'm just ranting

[@JustJRR]

Nah you're not. I completely relate. Thanks for watching and sharing!!! I appreciate you.

[@LeroyThompson462]

I can relate to what you are saying

[@kbmacaroni1627]

@@LeroyThompson462 I'm happy to know it's more people out there 💙

[@LeroyThompson462]

Be strong KB

[@kbmacaroni1627]

@@LeroyThompson462 💙💙

[@khaliq6731]

Felt so much of this! Pc culture is just catching up to gay acceptance so bi acceptance is gonna take a bit more time. I struggle fully fitting in both straight and gay circles tho but I’ve found good friends in both

[@JustJRR]

Exactly. 💯 I really felt this. Please subscribe and check out the #BisexualMenSpeak playlist on my page if you enjoyed the video.

[@alondralarios9521]

Man I just realized my bf of 2 years almost has been hiding the fact that he’s bisexual. He’s “curious” and I’m ok with it but I’m really torn he doesn’t have to open up to me about it. I feel there should be a safe space. And I’m kinda sad he feels a need to hide this side of him. Which I understand but idk what to do

[@MrSuperkalamies]

I admitted to myself I was a bi man after three years in a straight relationship. I had an easier time discussing this realization with people I just met than my girlfriend. This is most likely because in a straight relationship it is so easy to play the roles of boyfriend and girlfriend dictated by the surrounding society, and never really question whether those are in accordance with your own identity. I suggest that you try to build a safe space to talk about sex and sexuality and just ask about it. Even if you are mistaken, having those conversations will deepen your relationship.

[@dukiroki6891]

am a bisexual boy, my mind is a fucking mess because it is very common to me to feel under pressure. That if I'm too straight... that if I'm too gay... sometimes I can't stand it, I just want to be bisexual in peace. People sometimes are just mean.

[@JustJRR]

i know exactly whaat you mean!! Please subscribe I have more bi vids :)

[@LeroyThompson462]

Had to watch and listen to this again to fully absorb what you are saying, very well presented and you give food for thought

[@JustJRR]

❤

[@keoxat6247]

I personally love being the educator/biProf in my circle, but I can totally see how that can be taxing on someone. Even some genuinely interested people sometimes ask (variants of) the same question over and over. Hopefully that'll change as education on these topics becomes more common online.

[@JustJRR]

Yup yup! Thanks for your comment 💙💗💜

[@LeroyThompson462]

I agree Keoxat

[@theonlyswangeo]

Sweeter words were never spoken. Thank you.

[@JustJRR]

Thanks for watching 🙏🏾

[@ramirtheblackking3403]

I hate when people ask a 101 questions

[@JustJRR]

same. that's what google is for lol

[@LeroyThompson462]

So do I Ramir, people need educating

[@LeroyThompson462]

@@JustJRR Yes it is

[@kierraking1662]

I am a weirdo. I like bi men. I really like bi men that are okay with cross dressing. It’s comfortable for me. I’m weird, right? Oh! The kicker is…I’m in love with Jesus. #thetwist

[@eriswatts8877]

This is the first video I’ve watched of yours, and I want to say that your intro is hilarious.

[@JustJRR]

thanks!!! lol

[@richardcooper9015]

Great video very informative I've been bi for the past 10 years take care keep up the good work.

[@JustJRR]

Thanks a lot Richard 🙏🏾

[@LeroyThompson462]

Just JR, you should run a course on sexuality, this is such an enlightening video, thank you so much ❤

[@JustJRR]

Thanks for the love Tony 💘

[@PinkCakesandTea]

For me, it's jealousy. Most m seem to die over each other but look down upon w. It's severe competition.

[@dustind4694]

I remember coming out to a friend who is a really interesting guy, no shade meant, he and his now-husband have been living openly in NYC for like 30 years and it is awesome, but how surprising it was that he seemed completely ignorant of the existence of bi men, bi people in general really, and asked a lot of questions that were just shy of rude, like 'how do you manage to have a monogamous relationship, is it even possible?' Just... Kinda rough coming from a queer elder, y'know? I kind of spent my twenties just... Not talking about it, because I knew straight friends would be uncomfortable, and I didn't want to do the 'look at me I'm different' among gay ones. Just... Solidarity, man.

[@JustJRR]

I'm sorry to hear that man and can totally relate.

[@michaeld.williamsiii9026]

This is such a good video thank you sharing this content Abdul commentary and you story and being so open...💚✊🏾🏳️‍🌈

[@JustJRR]

Thanks for watching! I appreciate the support.

[@LeroyThompson462]

Yes Michael

[@goonn337]

I consider myself as pansexual

[@JustJRR]

Nice!!!

[@SoggyBeeferoni]

I haven’t come out yet as bi but I feel like everyone already knows so I don’t know if I should bother coming out

[@JustJRR]

I hear ya. It's up to you and it's not something that's even important for everyone to do. Nowadays I normally just let people assume I'm gay or straight. "Coming out" is not something you have to do.

[@LeroyThompson462]

@@JustJRR True

[@LeroyThompson462]

Just be "You" don't pressure yourself to come out

[@len1045678]

Met this guy who show me all the signs.. but when i show him im on that side of the fense he rejected me now im so angry.. becareful of Ppl that afraid to express their self Smfh

[@JustJRR]

I'm sorry to hear that 💔😰 Not being ready to accept or express your sexuality can often mean that you're not willing to accept others.

[@len1045678]

@@JustJRR my thing is.. i know the guy almost a year now when i thought it was time to show him that im bi, he rejected me, im tired of dealing with ppl who are indenial, deceithful and dnt know what the fuck they want. Right now im emtionally wreck

[@jayash2957]

i usually say im bi in the sense can find both attractive but not really want to date or be sexaul with both But ive always been somewhat mixed because i feel like im hiding apart of myself I wanna be open about it but i know there are a large amount of girls who dont like bi guys So im always trying to avoid coming off that way Not sure if you are still replying but do you have tips?

[@JustJRR]

Honestly, the way I navigate this now is I've gotten to a place where the only kind of women I'll allow myself to be open to are bi/pan women. Apps can help a lot with this, also hanging around LGBTQ+ spaces. Hope this helps ❤️🙏🏾

[@directorclarkmonroe]

Im bisexual judged by LGBTQ and straight folks

[@Topher_1986]

I identify as a masculine leaning man. Especially as I age. I am bisexual, and yes I agree with you. I definitely get along with masculine bi men and straight men way more than effeminate men.

[@Robert-vf6ny]

There are masc gay men too, don't forget.

[@Topher_1986]

@Robert-vf6ny yeah. Hard to find though.

[@jeremylincaoco7645]

​@@Topher_1986It's harder to find bi men they usually end up full blown gay like there are a lot of gay male celebs bi gurls and lesbian but bi men seemed extinct.

[@Topher_1986]

@jeremylincaoco7645 Just cuz you're dating a dude full time, don't mean you don't feel very attracted to women anymore. But dudes are easier to relate to is all.

[@jeremylincaoco7645]

@@Topher_1986 All I am saying is that bi men are extremely rare, it's hard to find a real bi man most of the time men who identify as bi just alwayz end up full gay like Ricky Martin, Matt Boomer, Wenthworth Miller etc.

[@miltonchizer]

LOVE IT 😍👏 #healtogetherbuildtogether

[@JustJRR]

Thanks so much for watching!!! Hoping this helped in some way 🙏🏾💙💗💜

[@LeroyThompson462]

Great #

[@hagegesamuel]

Almost all of my friends are straight. I stopped repressing my bisexuality at 27 and came out to most of my family eventhough I've never been with a guy. It just feels righter now. People don't care much usually. Except at my last job where homophobia was real. Apart from that, live your life and be grateful : you like boys and girls, that's awesome.

[@JustJRR]

🎯

[@reneetmp]

Oh Yes, I think by people of other genders also prefer not to disclose. In my experience it's having to deal with the potential negative reaction or comments, best not 😷

[@BIIGE79]

What's the song playing in the background?

[@JustJRR]

In my bed & He can only hold her both by Amy Winehouse

[@drednd5837]

Bisexuality is different for everyone. I see a lot of people explaining their preferences and what attracts them to people. You like who you like. It’s all about finding what works for you.

[@JustJRR]

Exactly. 💯

[@ramirtheblackking3403]

Yes that's understandable because you can relate to another gay man

[@eddiejeffery7015]

ramir The Black king are you saying he’s gay and not bi?

[@JustJRR]

nah i dont think that's what he's saying. in the video i talk about mostly being in community with Black gay men and how i often relate to gay men more than i do str8 men

[@ericvonbeck3618]

On point. 👍👍

[@JustJRR]

Thank you!

[@ericvonbeck3618]

@@JustJRR 😊

[@virgosrus5733]

Great video greater shirt

[@JustJRR]

Thanks a lot 🙏🏾

[@Blaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh]

Nope no muscles yet close though keep going you’re doing a good job

[@JustJRR]

LMFAO.

[@malum9478]

15 year olds really just go on the internet and say whatever in these comments.

[@BrunoRodrigues-fw9ri]

dude I really like the last two words you said. haha. Greedy and disgusted. It exactly what I feel. can you elaborate on that?

[@JustJRR]

Thanks for watching man. The way many people who are not bisexual+ describe our sexuality is as being greedy in that we are trying to be with/sleep with everyone regardless of gender or that we are all polyamorous and even when we are in a relationship we want to still be with other people. They sometimes say that want to be with men and women is disgusting and call it double dipping. I often find with the latter that those people tend to harbor a lot of homophobic views which paint gay men as infected or disgusting in some other way so bisexual+ men being with gay men and then with then women is something they find disgusting. Does this help?

[@liamjc2827]

I love u man

[@JustJRR]

thanks! :)

[@ajibolaukandnigerialiving]

As a married man with same gender loving tendency. I will be classed as bisexual due to my lifestyle choice. I love being in a heterosexual marriage and I love my female partner. Now am I monogamous😉. Am I safe sexually - YES! Most bisexual people start out feeling very confused about their attraction towards people of both sexes, questioning their own reality, identity; and wondering "Is something wrong with me?” Some spend their entire lives in this stage, hiding their sexual orientation, feeling isolated and alone with the inner turmoil over their "dual attractions. Many go through life identifying as straight or gay or lesbian in order to be accepted and make sense of their sexual orientation. Because their own experience does not conform to either gay or heterosexual supposed communities, we feel intense external pressure to choose one and identify with it. Intellectually, as a so called bisexual I feel good about being bisexual, but emotionally, I often experience extreme conflict living in the real world as bisexual. Being openly bisexual I believe as a Nigerian that I will be scorned by family and straight friends; and most likely rejected by my spouse and children, despite being a good husband and father; although not faithful and practising infidelity very sporadically and occasionally! To develop and maintain a bisexual identity requires inner strength, self-reliance, confidence, and independence. But I believe like you, sexuality is a spectrum - some people live their full authentic self, while some of us make informed choices to live alternative lifestyle for our own sanity.

[@JustJRR]

thank you so much for sharing! I do want to caution against saying that bisexuality is a choice and also using the word "lifestyle" to describe a sexual orientation. I go into depth about that here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/ronPaHlphctmmLc I liked a lot of the things you said here and would love to hear what you think about my video Growing Up Nigerian & LG(B)T: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bYWWgmdrgatnisk

[@LeroyThompson462]

You have explained yourself very eloquently Ajibola, I'd love to meet with you sit down and talk to you

[@virgosrus5733]

Hmm I think gay guys get asked the v question ALOT TO THO

[@JustJRR]

True. There's a lot of overlap. I think people who still ask gay men when they first meet them when they first had sex in 2020 know that they're overstepping/being nosey and just don't care. Whereas, I don't think people are conscious that their question is out of pocket when asking a bisexual person about their sexual experience with a particular gender.

[@virgosrus5733]

@@JustJRR I hear u. I just dont see how its possible to not know when u are completely out of order and not minding ur business regardless of a persons sexuality. I would never ask ANYONE about their orientation or anything related to it unless it was understood that this is what we are here to talk about for whatever reason. People not understanding that blows my mind honestly

[@LeroyThompson462]

Virgo R Us 😊

[@spencergilbert5238]

Thank you so much. It is so spot on. I am 43 and I can’t tell you how many relationships I’ve lost just for taking the chance that you have to take if you want a healthy relationship and being honest about your sexuality. Whether they are straight or gay, if I am bi I am other; so much so that the knee jerk response is disgust. Women are disgusted and behave as if you have automatically exposed them to AIDS; and Gay men treat you as if you’re delusional, in denial, and therefore unworthy of the respect that is essential for a healthy relationship. All of this to the best of my knowledge is systemic: meaning that it influenced by family formative years; community adolescent years; society adult life. Acceptance of people for who they are is the problem we all deal with. But bisexual men have it the worst (personal bias based on belief as a result of my personal experience).

[@kcmozart]

Preach!

[@JustJRR]

🙏🏾💙💗💜

[@falopeolaoluwa1073]

Awesome

[@JustJRR]

🙏🏾💙💗💜

[@jasonb7870]

I like trans and girly fem boys took a while to admit it to myself

[@cyruscherry35]

This is interesting...I was gonna point out that you seem fem and trying to deny you're gay but truly I've met fem guys that were completely straight

[@JustJRR]

Why'd you feel the need to point that out?

[@cyruscherry35]

@@JustJRR naw bra...i didn't mean to offend you. But most openly gay guys are fem AND are immediately deemed as just being gay

[@JustJRR]

@@cyruscherry35 insinuating that because I'm feminine that must mean I'm lying about being bi is rude as hell. Keep it to yourself next time.

[@toetoebilly-wz2bk]

Amy

[@brucerankin604]

Hmmm love it

[@JustJRR]

🙏🏾❤

[@goonn337]

Where are you from sir?

[@JustJRR]

Far Rockaway, New York

[@falopeolaoluwa1073]

Interesting

[@JustJRR]

💙💗💜

[@sideeqbakari3002]

I love you 😘

[@JustJRR]

Right back at ya 😘

[@sideeqbakari3002]

Can I get your contact please?

[@kerycktotebag8164]

[@JustJRR]

💙💗💜

[@vamptigerwarrior8676]

[@JustJRR]

❤

[@Amaling]

My dude it sounds like you’re making the barrier yourself. I’m a reasonably androgynous bi guy and have never found such an issue. Yeah people ask questions but at this point eh fuck it people want to learn. It’s not like you have to tell people about bisexual stuff every time you see them

[@JustJRR]

hmm...maybe you're right about some of this but I know from experience that some gay men have said certain things I mention in the video

[@Hannah11235]

"I want to be around those people more that I related to". For obvious reasons. You're more conservative than you might think.

[@JustJRR]

What was the point of this comment?