Why My Wife's Past Wasn't An Issue | Joe Bonifacio

White Knighting: this is a common term among young people nowadays to describe a specific set of transactional behavior. It’s the opposite of unconditional love. And it’s unconditional love that explains why my wife’s past wasn’t an issue to me. First, God’s unconditional love to her that he let me have for her as well.
This is what I talk about on the vlog - why my wife's past wasn't an issue.
Music by Epidemic Sound
Questions? Clarifications? Violent reactions? If you want to talk more, find me here:
Facebook: / josephbonifacio
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Or you can always e-mail me at: [e-mail]

[@IslanderloverBKK]

A good friend of mine fell in love with a prostitute. Most of our friends made fun of him, and the awkwardness when he brings his then gf in our events was irritating. I've always been open-minded, so I welcomed her warmly in our group. I had a lot of heart to heart talks with both my friend and her, which made me believe in their love more. I also trusted she changed her old ways completely. He proposed, she accepted but none of our friends wanted to attend their wedding. His parents weren't sure at first as well, but it took some convincing and bucket of tears from us all, as well as prayers to accept the situation. They had a nice intimate wedding, no friends showed up except myself from his side. Their 15th wedding anniversary is coming this December, and their 3 kulits who call me ninang are growing up fast in front of my eyes. Sometimes, we really need to open our minds and hearts for people like my kumare. I saw her sincerity of changing from the first time we had a heart to heart talk, and I know she needed someone other than my friend to trust her. To judge is easy, but to understand is stronger🙏❤️

[@fredtacang3624]

Your "friends'" loss, not the happy couple's ;)

[@carlfranov7170]

They obviously weren't friends of at all.

[@deahgalvez3996]

When we encounter God. God didn't look us in our Past. He look us Like His own Children 😊💖

[@onehit2364]

I met my wife at a bakery store...she works as a tindera i a 5th dental student and we were vanished from my relatives..after 37 beautiful years of hardwork we are blessed with 5 successful sons and daughters and my prayers were answered.. praise the lord Jesus

[@roseannlandicho4574]

Someday, may I found the number one believer in the work of God in my life. 🥺❤ Thank you for this, Ps. Joe!

[@marlouisemanalac6519]

Thank you for this blog Pastor Joe. I've been in a wrong direction before. But when I accept Jesus and meet my love of my life it's changes everything and give redirection for my life. I'm very grateful that I met my GF that now we both honoring God. And accept me despite of my wrongdoing before. Therefore who is in Christ now, the Old has Gone; the new has come. 2 Corinthians 5:17.

[@glendamacalalad4510]

Thank you so much! I'm out of words, but again thank you so much. My 3rd subscription from thousand KZbinrs.

[@JefLivs]

You have a blessed perspective. Amazing man. 🙏

[@pamclemente]

Quality content. 💖

[@makicow]

I also got to love onigiri recently. It's so simple but it's so delicious.

[@acrecords2481]

I pray every woman who thinks that their past disqualifies them from marrying a godly man would find someone who’d accept her whole being and love her as Jesus does. Like how Ptr. Joe loves Ms. Carla ❤️✨🙏🏻

[@grayzdreamer3369]

Amen po🙏

[@tinkerbelle2271]

Di ba Rica?

[@keijibunbun993]

Thank you... This is my prayer too being a single mom...🙏💝

[@empressatheism5146]

Drama queen

[@acrecords2481]

@@tinkerbelle2271 Her real name po is Regina Carla 😊

[@xairacaparas-ventura5122]

My takeaway: Love is not transactional. You give your all, just like how Jesus gave Himself for us. Thank you, Pastor! ❤️🙏🏻

[@joebonifacio]

Yeah! And that's when we enjoy the relationship the most.

[@sharingoutlovesol1663]

@@joebonifacio it's true

[@deahgalvez3996]

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. 2 Corinthians 5:17 🙂

[@kristalortizluis8706]

I really like how practical and attainable Pastor Joe is.. sad that sometimes, leaders in the church, are the one judging our pasts, or actions - just because you wear a bathing suit on the beach, or openly airing out your dismay in the government..

[@joebonifacio]

As long as you don’t air your dismay while wearing a bathing suit, you’re fine. Jk

[@brixanthonycampo1052]

So much relate pastor but I'm on the other side. I'm the one with a dark past and secret sins. I had the courage to tell her my past, and the words that I heard was "I'm so proud of you of what you are right now. Your life itself is a wonderful testimony of God's amazing grace". I said to God, " Lord what did I do to deserve a woman like her." All i can think, is napakabuti ng ating Panginoon. He's not just the Author and Perfecter of our faith, but He writes the best love story we could ever ask for🙂 Ps. Soon we're gonna marry pala😄❤

[@gillianeazuro5570]

Wow! Congrats po ❤️ Praise God

[@brixanthonycampo1052]

@@gillianeazuro5570 thank you po. God is really good

[@MiriamandArdy]

Wow. So POGI! Congrats 👏

[@brixanthonycampo1052]

@@MiriamandArdy thank you Ma'am Miriam❤

[@bokaltv3848]

i'm sure she knew. anlakas kaya ng amoy 😁🤘

[@celynecoloma2465]

The best thing you can do to your spouse is to be the number one believer in the work of God in their life 😇💙

[@hgt1758]

Full of wisdom insights. Truly you listened to the Lord for you to perfectly articulate this all. It's lifting Jesus, honoring your wife and elevating men who has mindset like you in edifying way. God bless the works of your hands even more Pastor.

[@springf85]

feels like i’m having a deep conversation with a friend, so effortless and straight to the point! keep em coming ptr. joe!

[@joebonifacio]

Thanks! I like this treatment also because I can wear simple clothes. Haha

[@oldlandmarkministry7703]

Sadly most men forget, "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, AND GAVE HIMSELF FOR IT!" (Ephesians 5:25) Total sacrifice!

[@celynecoloma2465]

Wow! All marriages (relationships) need Jesus! And Jesus is enough, regardless of your past and present 💙 😇

[@jaysonmakalintulad4514]

I remember Rica perelejo as a co-student in Ateneo. I’m not sure what year she was in, but i was a freshman or a sophomore that time. I felt bad because she would be in the cafeteria alone, and of course as a celebrity, people would look at you randomly. I wanted to sit with her but obviously as a guy and with her celebrity status, that would be a weird thing to do. I didn’t know much about her beyond the movies she made, but she did seem a lot different that what she was when she was still active in showbiz. Anyway, that was a long time ago. I hope rica peralejo was able to finish her studies there. God bless

[@joebonifacio]

Thanks for your kind thoughts. She graduated in 2012.

[@markdc6286]

What struck me was Christ-sufficiency. Indeed, Jesus is enough!

[@jowilamarca7632]

Your love story Ptr. Joe and Ate Carla gives us a dive on finding real love by living in our singlehood that our full security and complete assurance are found only in Christ. That's the game changer. So much love!

[@mariellaricareyes6593]

Oo nga naman bakit ba kasi big deal sakanila yung PAST ng partner nila 🤦 kaya nga past is past e. Hehe. Dahil sa mga past + Jesus mas matibay yung relationship e. Kasi they know better na. ❤️ I am amazed pa nga sa mga past events ng life namin ng fianceé ko e. Kasi kung hindi dahil don baka walang kami. Walang plot twist story ni Lord. Oh db! Hehehehehe. Parang sa asian lang ata yung ganyan? Big deal ang past. Ps. Pastor Joe, nakakahawa yung tawa mo 🤣🤣🤣

[@janeyyy8703]

Thank you for that. It really helps us to look at the person we love with so much love and grace coming from Jesus. Waking up each morning and lying down at night seeing the person beside you, thinking "Grabe Lord, this person is really a blessing in my life and I cant thank you enough for bringing him into my life'. As I always pray, "Lord, I hope I meet someone that when I look at him, I'm just so blessed to have him in my life regardless of his flaws."

[@lindsayashleydelapaz203]

"one of the best things you can do for your spouse is to be the number one believer in the work of God in their life. To be someone who will say: 'I see it. I see evidence of the Holy Spirit." I used to be like this, having that idea that I did and I was expecting he would do the same towards me, but after all I realized if the thing is about comparing, he did much better than me. However, this mindset was not truly good. In love, you are partners in Christ. We love and we give. We can add that loving the person means also accepting his past, regardless how good or bad it is. After all, each of us has broken past that receives underserved Grace from God! Thank you Pastor Joe! Every Thursday is like a late night Devo + mentoring. 😁💓

[@joebonifacio]

Nice!

[@mr.balawis9948]

Ang problema lang naman e kapag hindi na nga maganda ang nakaraan mo, tapos proud na proud ka pa.

[@stubborn98]

Everyone has a past. Failing in school, being involved in street rumbles, being stubborn as a kid, telling lies, gossiping, and a lot more. If you have a past, that means you've changed.

[@rosaliomulawan1245]

Thank you ptr.joe. 1. I love the format of the video 2. I love the simple topic 3. I love the biblical points 4. Continue to do this pastor. 5. God blesses you and your family.

[@joebonifacio]

Thanks for the encouragement!

[@rjb.6553]

Wow. Very powerful! Your past don't define you once you encounter God. You're a new creation! Praise God!

[@jelaizki1]

Pastor joe can you do a masterclass hahaha but seriously thank you for being an instrument of giving your opinions on stuffs that are not so explained or talk about in public..

[@allenalesna]

Some people are quick to take the 'moral highground' and never look into oneself. Life is a journey, not everyone treads the same path. Some paths are straight forward, while some can be bumpy and even treacherous. But what's really important is the future, and the commitment to make that future together for the better.

[@donrimo]

All marriages need Jesus. And Jesus is more than enough.

[@holgaholic]

paano kung di ka naniniwala kay jesus?

[@suzettemariano7872]

Thanks Pr Joe for the very biblical, very wisdomful and very encouraging respond to many questions. I have nothing against those who questioned you that way. I could guess where their points are coming from too. Many people thought Christians are perfect and should do this and do that to act holy. But many people don't understand that Christians are forgiven sinners. We became holy not because we do the right thing but what Christ has done for us. This vlog is very informative and reflective. I am inspired by you and Ms Rica. It only shows and reveals more the grace of Jesus in your family and the work of the Holy Spirit in each of your life. Thanks sir for proclaiming the Gospel and the main and only point is that everyone needs Jesus regardless of our past and present, and Jesus will make a big difference in our future, the assurance everybody should hope for. Praise God and God bless your family sir!✝️😀🙏

[@joebonifacio]

Thank you! Yeah... okay lang na may mga ganong tanong. O kahit yung ibang mga kumokontra sa comments dito o sa ibang vlogs. Lahat naman tayo may process eh. Hehe

[@dropyvisuals4355]

She is past the CC phase, that's why she chose to settle. Just my guess tho.

[@aldrinmiguel6657]

Thank you, Pastor Joe! This is a really timely video as I've recently just learned about this girl's past that's different than mine. I've been looking forward to making things serious with her and you've taught me all the right things to prepare myself for that. God bless you and your wife Pastor Joe!

[@MrPogiBalut]

Hello! from San Diego,CA USA

[@winkystreegan6244]

this just made me feel sorry for rica kasi pointing out her past is unnecessary and you projected like you were holier than thou and you had to deal and accept her past even reading those stupid questions mentioning her sexually active past🙄

[@mklik8736]

But some woman never change

[@Matt_7896]

9:12 is something those in traditional churches are strongly holding on to. Really messed up. Not just in purity but also most of the time in finances and good works. They're missing a lot big time! Sad but it's their reality within their circles. Can't blame them.

[@oar-N-oasis]

Aha.. again, Im watching a real MAN here! More wisdom and love sir Joe.

[@zi.a]

"Your past isn't even going to be the biggest issue. Your present and your future is." :)

[@tasssaharad.lavilla2731]

Amen! Jesus is enough! 🙌🙏

[@jennybequio7335]

I am really looking forward for everyone to have the same mindset. Stereotyping is really common now a days.

[@meadowdez6302]

2 Corinthians 5:17 - wonderful promise 🙏 & this vlog is on point thanks Ptr.Joe 🙌

[@zieds2247]

Sir can you also do a vlog on how you deal with losing your hair because I can see that your totally confident and comfortable with your looks. Bagay po sa inyo Sir and you rock that look.

[@joebonifacio]

Hahaha!!! Sige, let's think about that one...

[@zieds2247]

@@joebonifacio Thank you Sir. God bless from YOUR brother in Islam.

[@oldlandmarkministry7703]

Another powerful verse. "But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord." (2 Corinthians 3:18)

[@NghtMonster]

What we need to remember to take courage is in the real true fact that Jesus spent his time with absolute sinners and loved them. This love should be forefront in our minds when it comes to accepting others purely as they are. Regardless of past. Loving people as they are, accepting people as they are and Praying for those that might be struggling in their life decisions to do right. 2 Corinthians 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made PERFECT in weakness."

[@sharevlinda2814]

I dont think Rica had bad past. It Was Part of her career. sunod sa handler manager at nang karamihan or influences at naki bagay sa mundong kanyang kinalalagyan noon. And She needed to work for her family. Glad You found Each Other.

[@princessjaimeegaliza]

I love this vlog. Ive been a christian since birth, pero gaya ng sabi mo life happens and now i am married to someone who is not a christian and everyday is a struggle. Thankful for your wisdom, i will try to see God's work in my husband everyday and start from there. Thank you..

[@reghd5038]

I watch your wife’s vlogs because I can get some insightful ideas at lagi incorporate yun situation na May wisdom kaya nakikita ko sya as a mom and wife. Even I’m a bit older than her, she can inspire me as a mom and wife.

[@jellica6662]

God brought me here to hear this. You're a blessing sir. Keep on enlightening people. May our Lord keep on blessing you the wisdom of His truth.

[@mamamaefinds4447]

wow people can be so judgmental! thank you for this video. Gods grace is more than sufficient to cover all our past. Marriage is a committment not about our past but our now. God bless your ministry Pastor Joe!

[@annagual2442]

So much wisdom...I like your vlogs and Rica's also because they of the substance and content..Hindi puro superficial lang..thank u...

[@febeilao]

Thank you for this Ptr. Joe. My views were very different before watching this video. Praise God for using you in correcting me. I will align my views and beliefs with yours because I believe you have aligned them with God's Word. Praise the Lord. Also, I believe godly character, servant leadership and self sacrifice are definitely what we are looking for! @3:35

[@neliacarlos2368]

Thank you for loving her unconditionally

[@defrancasj]

Thanks for sharing this Pastor! 💕🙏🏼 It’s a blessing!

[@imeldapaguila6001]

You’re such a true person. Sana mas madami pang katulad mo sa mundong ito. I am really amazed how understanding you are. Your perspective really had an impact on me. Today’s world is really scary wd all those hurtful judgments. Putting a person down just because of her/his mistakes in d past. Stigma n po un. At nkkaapekto s mental health. Was & am a victim. You’re such an inspiration. Sobrang lucky ni ms rica for having you sir.

[@defrancasj]

OMG! I eat Onigiri here in Japan almost everyday!!! LOL

[@arleneu.almonte5676]

Such a good example of God's servant. Full of God's wisdom. Stay blessed Pastor Joe .

[@arsieespino4634]

I know someone her husband, past, drugs, women, alcoholic & so on. She introduced Christ to her husband & how Christ changed his father too, growing in alcoholic & anger family. To make d long story short, no one will understand the UNCONDITIONAL LOVE of God, unless that person is Truly Born Again Christian. Now their married 27 years, their love & support each other in sickness & health. Focus your eyes on God & his Promises. Eternity is Real. All things are Temporary, what makes you go on & stronger is the Love of Christ.

[@thecrazycreative7809]

Amen to this, ptr. Jo! It's not about his/her past but who she/he now and how God sees he/she now. It's us seeing the person's beauty through God's lense :) God indeed transforms lives :)

[@iamCaptainMikePH]

Glad this video appeared on my recommended feed. Now subscribing.

[@cookyrae5397]

Majority of the questions sound hypocritical and over righteous. One’s past doesn’t define the person or what merit would Christ sacrifice have if our past will condemn us for eternity? I’ve watched your wife’s interview with VP LENI and she showed, not just intelligence, but also humility. That was the first time I watched her vlog and I’m hooked. Your wife is a woman of substance, no wonder she’s got the guts to arrange an interview with my VP, now my PRESIDENT.

[@michaelferrer2823]

Pastor Joe pleased help me i really need your advice and prayers and i want someone to talk to its bothering me for decades and gusto ko ng makalaya about my issue with my wife. I know i am the one who should change pero hirap na hirap na po ako... Please reply po thnks and Godbless

[@cydvargas]

Tama! Her past doesn't define her nor her present or future. Our identity is in Christ and that's what makes it really special. I love how you put it together.

[@M1dKnight1am]

But marriage is not about love right? Its always been transactional. The man provides X and the Woman provides Y. If along the marriage the man / woman could not fulfil his duties then the woman would divorce the man or vice-versa, so where is the love in that? If you are summoned thru the court systems paying for alimony, where is the love in that? Divorce around the world is over 50% specially in the US. Why would you risk being married? Its like sky diving, jumping on a plane with 50% chance that your parachute would open.

[@yanes.pebenito7582]

“One of the best things you can do for your spouse is to be the #1 BELIEVER of the work of God in their life.” Boom!!!

[@jaimeeignacio197]

I agree with everything that you said Sir Joe. Everything is on point. A person's past shouldn't matter at all. You are a great child of God. May God bless you and your family more.

[@prosepraises8519]

The last part deeply touched me (and convicted me). "God, show me how and where You are working in his life.." Indeed, probably the saddest thing that we could do in our marriage is to doubt that God is at work in each other's lives, or to just simply give up hope on that person. Godbless Ptr Joe!

[@pandecocojam]

I see the intention and how this kind of disclosure is informative and even inspirational. There's just a feeling that I can't shake off - that the perspective is a little bit pompous. Everyone has a past, including pastors. Medyo may parts lang nayabangan ako sa premise.

[@elle-ls7ks]

ang nakuha ko sa video na to is Jesus doesnt see you the way you see yourself Jesus sees you not for your past but Jesus sees you the way He sees you and loves you and has already forgiven you no matter what youve done in the past Love doesnt keep record of wrongs and someday, if God will, a man who is in Christ will love you the way Jesus loves you. kaya kahit ano pang nagawa mo or if you feel disqualified because of what has happened to you kahit di mo gusto, or even you have given up into sin but once you repented, Jesus forgives you and gives you new life. salamat ptr joseph, for this video and for loving your wonderful wife. truly the old is gone, the new has come.

[@mariatheresaguzman6410]

It's different when church pastor did the opposite as what pastor Joe to his wife. Church pastor supposed to be the motivator of women to change if she's living in darkness or wrong way. Respect is necessity to motivate a woman. But if church pastor disrespect a woman out of lust to her then the church pastor is a woman wrecker than a motivator. How to demoted a church pastor if the church believed to him so much. At least, the woman victim would feel justice from the church. Unless the church pastor demoted himself voluntarily then I knew right then that Jesus Christ is with him truly.

[@daimlerli]

So to allude your story to an onigiri; it's like a god-centered loving relationship because it has a core of something precious and delicious, wrapped in a layer of rice that nourishes and sustains, and covered by a sheet of nori that protects and binds. The core represents the divine love that fills the hearts of the partners, the rice represents the daily bread that God provides for their needs, and the nori represents the covenant that seals their commitment. Just like an onigiri, a god-centered loving relationship is a simple but satisfying gift that can be enjoyed anywhere and anytime. 🍙 Joke lang pakulo lang yan ni Chatgpt. haha na inggit lang ako sa Onigiri mo!

[@---qu9uf]

Sorry I’m a woman myself but I won’t allow my son for marrying a prn start or prosti. I won’t teach my Son being a simp. There’s still many women out there who has a clean pass.✌🏼🙂

[@alvinbustamante2384]

lodi, ja jaja 🤣🎉🎉 make safe everyone 🙏 more power and godbless 🇵🇭

[@imMC3]

Even during the height of Carla’s sexy star career, she was never bastusin. You can see na trabaho lang talaga. Was it wrong? Maybe. Pero look at her now.

[@rolobonrostro2685]

Ito lang yan.. kahit ilang lalaki pa nakahalik sa labi at dumaan sa kanya. Kung mahal mo, mahal mo. Relihiyoso ka man o hindi. Minsan kabaliktaran pa ng ideal woman ang nakakatuloyan naten diba. Kasi nga, it moves in mysterious ways. Apir!

[@iainhanley5461]

[Action required] point of break off with you and all connected persons.

[@ambassadoroffaith1018]

Yes obey to please God the relationship is between you and God

[@gcupin]

Cast the first stone…Nobody is blameless. Only God is infallible.

[@edzsimpoda7603]

⁷ and you are smart and you can do things places that 7u

[@ambassadoroffaith1018]

I like this my husband and I same like same similarity

[@redeemedbygod620]

Thank you po sa life nyo at ms Rica Peralejo. Inspiration po kayo for young people like us. 🙏❤

[@holylionman2]

Great talk! When people dwell in the past, they will normally have wounds that need to heal. Jesus is the place where God reconciles your past for the sake of your future.

[@MelGph]

I love a man like this who's Godly

[@rosaliedaliling1878]

Godbless bro and ur family.ur family is blessed in christ.

[@Malunesj]

That good sir,if we have God evething was changed

[@bretthoussenloge8744]

for gods sake, i watched the video, it must trouble you whatever it is because you are so vague about what her past was. you seem like a nice fellow, wish u well

[@cmeow1632]

Thank you 🥺

[@imthebest7290]

I hope my past will not be a problem for my future wife.

[@jpl9723]

Who's your wife? Rica Peralejo?

[@gerdinef474]

Wow. The first time to watch your vlog. I only watch Rica's haha. But now I'm subscribed on your channel. I love your marriage advise in simple and practical ways.

[@mykecaadvincula9545]

Grabeh pastor! More more! ❤️❤️❤️

[@allenalesna]

8:00 That's a very strong and important point, what's discussed here. The idea is treading along 'self rightiousness' which is a veeery dangerous, even distructive, path to take. I like your insights. First time to watch your videos. Good content.

[@ausrpedos4288]

Man of principles you are. Shows a lot why you are happy and satisfied with your life. Thanks for sharing.

[@miss.mariette]

Jesus is enough 💙💙💙

[@warriorforchristjesus7804]

Amen to that! All Marriages Need Jesus :)

[@kaycabuyoc4724]

Grabe ang wisdom!😍

[@auronph]

Grabe pastor Joe thank you so much for this.

[@hopefloats3633]

Apart from the fact that this was so enriching & enlightening.. kinikilig ako esp. dun sa huli when you said, "let's go na, my partner needs coffee. What a loving man/partner/husband you are Pastor. 💕 😁

[@joebonifacio]

Uy thanks. Pero hindi lagi. Here’s a story of when I was very judgmental to Carla because of her past. Not for romantic reasons. But for more fundamental ones. Story starts in 5:25 kzbin.info/www/bejne/Z6ivhmWha5yXoKs