Why Women Are Starting To Normalise Giving Kids To Their Fathers

Why women are starting to normalise giving kids to their fathers.

[@2stayweird]

Good. These men wanted the "legacy" so let them parent the "legacy" 🤷‍♀

[@tashawilliams8093]

💯

[@LosAngelesLaura]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽

[@spicyheather9001]

Women shouldn't want to because our grandma and great grandma ancestors got completely washed away and we don't even know their name, favorite color, what they do, act, ect. The remembrance of only our fathers last name smh. Black women in slavery definitely shouldn't of and surprising they didn't think twice of giving their last name to their children while being forced r@9ed and being pregnant from our own black men and the white man. Some of black women children got adopted while the women died from slavery, r@9e or giving birth, so at least if it's out of black women control then yes it's not their fault. Surprisly black women still wanna praise Jesus and being holy in a religion after your ancestors literally slaved and probably died on the fields after giving birth to our other ancestors being forced to believe in a God or religion. We don't know our ancestors anyway and the only legacy we black women has from them is history, culture, where we came from which at least we know that from our ancestors which will continue to go down in history. Taking a DNA test will definitely tell you who are you related to also genealogy online, and what you're mixed with, what in you blood.

[@fayepatrice1672]

And the thing is, single fathers get soooooo much more support than single mothers. They will have mothers, aunties, cousins, girlfriend, wife, sil, and everybody pitching in. A lot of times they don’t even have to do anything. So let them raise their babies if you’re struggling on your own.

[@Lilzki]

And they get praised and admired, while single mothers get shamed and vilified

[@LisaSoulLevelHealing]

​@@Lilzkiit stops now 🤷🏾‍♀️❤

[@babyg7796]

Girl yes! All of this!! It’s like a badge of honor to be a single dad. Whole time the single dads are the ones who ACTUALLY get the community support so it makes sense for them to go to them honestly. Dads get the true support of a “village” while mothers never do.

[@AG-iu9lv]

I already have been saying to give the kids to the fathers for ages, but this is another great reason to do so that I had not considered, and I will be citing it going forward. Thank you!

[@shaolinqueen3684]

Add, the men will show off their kids on social media pretending to be the best daddies, only to take the credit of all the WOMEN taking care of his kids. As usual, women either single mothers, or the dads women are taking care of these babies. They do this to lure more women into their harem.

[@k1a9l9i2]

Aren't males always complaining about how the court system favors mothers? They should be happy that they're getting custody of their kids. That's what they wanted, right?

[@user-br3ty9rt1m]

XYs don’t know what they want, they just know how to yap online. 🥱

[@MeltingOnYourMind]

They even try to say single fathers raise better children, so now they should be able to prove this opinion is fact😌

[@AndreiFantastic]

lol the XYs just get mad that women leave them and they can’t control them anymore. But let them have to be single dads without support and no bangmaid/dummy to play step mom and they’ll be crying

[@esmeralda6111]

in US. U have much work to do.

[@lashwithlex]

Meanwhile, men actually get custody 60% of the time when they file…….

[@ladybug3380]

They say men raise better children so yes give them those kids.

[@SamanthasUniverse]

That Part.

[@BeautyInYOU583]

😅😅😅 I’m Not sure about this. My dad raised my brother and over spoiled him. He turned out to be a pitiful adult.

[@redgoddess]

Give them those babies! They are the dad. I don't see the problem with it 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@fatfig1]

I just saw an article about how men that actually do their job parenting, want less children. Funny that. I'm just thinking about how many men would not have babies in every corner if they actually had to be a father because the world doesn't coddle them

[@jayogee913]

I know men who whine and cry about pay a PITTANCE of child support! They pay anywhere from $100-300/month, which doesn't even cover three DAYS of daycare for the kids, to say nothing of the rest of the month's daycare bills, food, medical insurance, larger housing spaces, supplies, missed work opportunities because of lack of child care, etc etc etc. Yes, let the men deal with all that while you cut them a little check each month to support your own kids. I have no problem with that. Custody should at LEAST be 50/50, anyway.

[@susiebear3316]

​@@jayogee913No, no 5050. It needs to be just the way that you first said it a lot of these dusty's. Drop their poverty serum into women in order to trap them. BW needs to be either Child-free, full custody to father,or divest. No more of living anything less than that of happy fulfilling lives for black women.

[@kmross73]

Me neither. He's their parent too.

[@cureaurora7591]

They say they want a lEgAcY but don't actually want to raise and take care of that lEgAcY😪

[@l3zfrancais]

These men will cry about the mother not “allowing” them to see their kids. Now it’s a problem when the mom let them have their kids. These women can’t win!!!

[@WalkingUprighteously]

Period!! 🙅🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️

[@Alice15210]

The minute a man says the mother is not allowing him to see his kids, i ask if he went to children's court?? The police?? Did you file fo custody?? Are you even supporting your children financially?? And trust me they dont answer. They are so pressed in proving that they are not in their children's lives bcs the mother is "toxic", "horrible" and anything negative they can say. And if you fall for it, all of that will be said about you once you're in the same position

[@goodsewlinc]

@@Alice15210unfortunately i learned this the hard way and now i am everything he said about his first child’s mother, and he is actively continuing the pattern. It’s so sad and sickening.

[@SamanthasUniverse]

But at least we can live in some peace when we give them to Dad and make ourselves Weekend Mom.😊

[@Nithinithinith]

This is why you should be childfree and avoid playing the game.

[@alfredacoats7742]

Didn't these males cry for YEARS about "Give the children to the father" but watch how collectively they will start complaining and down on this

[@AmberColeman-gq1wn]

Of course this will happen. This will especially be upsetting for those men who got women that “ they didn’t want “ pregnant. This will also be potentially very dangerous for a large portion of kids. Because most of the time, single mothers are simply lied on. They’re not keeping these kids away, then men just that excuse to redeem Themselves .

[@uzougwu1511]

That's a tactics because 9 times out 10 the women won't agree to it so they say it and now they are being bewildered as to women listening to them on this situatio.

[@Azaryah_thenoob]

Emmmmmm.....not if they get what women get....child support, food stamps, housing vouchers, claiming them on taxes etc. They will be happy.

[@alwaysannoyedforever518]

@@Azaryah_thenoobthey do silly. They still don’t want them because children are hard to raise. The only thing that makes it better is having a village. You think government assistance magically makes raising a whole human easy? Get out of here.

[@MissJ619]

These males are just mad bc they can't tell Kayla that she chose wrong, or that she should've chosen better. It burns them up, that they can't shame her, and that she will get to live her best life and still be a mother😂😂

[@Priscilla_Boye]

Exactly

[@fatfig1]

History as old as time, they are always afraid that we will do the same to them that they do to us when we have the same rights and privileges they do 😂😂😂

[@childfreechick2980]

They try to call her a deadbeat but they can't do that either. She spends time with her kids and pays for them too. I love that for her.

[@MissJ619]

@@childfreechick2980 Exactly!!

[@thebyrdspot4719]

Dat part 💯

[@maenad1231]

Go for it. Child support is cheaper than custody. Men want to have kids but don’t want to be fathers force them to be accountable and make sure they realize fatherhood comes with having kids

[@linapesz313]

What if he doesn't want to take them...and the mother doesn't want to keep them?

[@txspacemom765]

It's about darn time. I am tired of everything with children being put on mothers shoulders. If you hold men accountable, in a public way, they will need to step it up. People need to call them out and often and loudly. I had a neighbor who was struggling with 2 kids. Dad was sporadic at best. She had an amazing work opportunity come along, after 12 years of financial struggling. She sent her 2 kids to live with Dad for their high school years and went after her dream job, achieved it and came back a better human and mom. She was raked over the coals for it but we let men do it EVERY DAY all day. And she paid child support and was able to establish college funds for her kids, something her ex never did in all the years he didn't have them.

[@DeeDee-uj7nd]

As she should. Very happy for her.

[@dantayhylton9938]

Exactly, they have too much time on their hands cheating!!!!! Why not take care of your children.

[@frozenheart7133]

"In all the years he didn't have them" That's the part man! If my kids are with their dad for a week, I'm able to make quality improvements in our life. The the kids are with me he just makes more kids.

[@keishab7505]

@@dantayhylton9938 This!!!!

[@yamomma8560]

and that still wasn’t good enough smh people truly hate women i’m starting to really see it now like wtf no matter what we do… what we want doesn’t matter at all

[@xiamariansupreme72]

Makes sense to me. Men, especially Black men, say single moms are SO horrible & raise bad men, so let's give the kids over to the dads then!

[@redrock740]

This is a new era where men can take over parenthood. Good luck!

[@annt.7785]

Uh oh, now it's gonna Armageddon if these males raise them 😂😂😂.

[@Ambrosia__]

This has always bothered me how men will use "single mom" as an insult. Um, excuse me? They should be shaming these worthless men who leave their kids. Embarrassing.

[@chantellemodisane]

I FULLY SUPPORT WOMEN WHO DO THAT. Men are comfortable asking women for kids but won’t take care of them. Nah, give that man his baby and sign out of your parental rights😂🥂🤝🏽

[@pettypossum724]

The media has whined about mothers for decades, so let the fathers have them. We'll see if the whinging continues. Plus, when a man is the full time carer he can't set up a "franchise" with another woman so easily and the mother can work and do her own thing.

[@meganakinsanya4702]

I had one guy I dated in Canada attempt to threaten me he would get me pregnant, I told him I would have the baby and drop him/her and cross that border back to the US. Good luck to him finding me for child support. He was petrified 😂

[@SwanTheQueen]

😂 epic lol 😅

[@hourexodus5204]

😂😂😂

[@mogulmade]

Same. I told my ex "I know where your mother lives"... it took him some time to get what I was saying 😂but was terrified when he did. "You would leave the baby?" "Yes, and be on a plane the next minute" 😂😂😂

[@meganakinsanya4702]

@@mogulmade😂😂

[@annstewart8506]

Let these males realise anyone can be a father it takes a special man to be a "dad."

[@augustG.I.F]

👑💜💯 Yaaasssssss 🎉 representation matters. Caring for your children matters!!

[@WalkingUprighteously]

No! I think you got it backwards. Anyone can be a dad, but it takes a special man to be a FATHER!!

[@annt.7785]

It was the other way around 20 years ago. Dad's are the spurm donors, a father is the one that helps raise the kids, now in modern times, you guys have switched it around. Make up your damn minds, all these "quotes" are just recycled nonsense.

[@annt.7785]

​@@WalkingUprighteously​Yes they did get it backwards because I remember 20 years ago, it was the other way around. Black folks always gotta get it wrong, just like our people constantly get that money is the root of all evil scripture in the bible wrong, wrong and more wrong (instead of saying the love of money), no matter how much we show the verse and correct them, they STILL constantly get it wrong 😂😂😂.

[@beaniesonna3052]

I am so happy for this! My mom did this. She gave her sons to the father and she took us girls. Guess what… now the boys hardly ever speak to their dad because they realize he is the problem.

[@LisaSoulLevelHealing]

I would do this....I can raise a girl. I am not here to raise a boy, that's a man's job. It's how I was raised, and I think it works.

[@amberinthemist7912]

Excellent idea because I could never leave a girl behind.

[@beaniesonna3052]

@@LisaSoulLevelHealing if I ever get married and have kids, I would do the same if we divorce. Don’t women understand that men only paying child support and not having to take care of the kids is the easy way out? Give them the kids and let them have to spends hours being actual fathers!

[@T.C556]

Wise woman.

[@NamasteInYourLane]

Yes! This is how it should be done. Let the man raise the boys.

[@shaolinqueen3684]

LEAVE THESE MEN SINGLE FATHERS.

[@saffylllama5609]

🤣🤣🤣

[@shaolinqueen3684]

​@saffylllama5609 listen I yell this at every post I see them talking about mothers and single mothers.

[@Freverprincess]

😂😂😂😂real shit

[@autumnskai6383]

@@shaolinqueen3684 yup, just weekend visitation and pay child support. That's the easy life lol

[@BigNoe-u7u]

There's legit more and more of them 🥰

[@rubysbaby822]

I worked with a girl that had 3 kids 3 baby daddies and made all 3 single fathers. She only had the youngest every other weekend and the older 2 girls only came when they wanted to. I kind of loved that for her. She said she wanted to marry and but things didn’t work out so when these guys left she told them to take their kids.

[@shopece8807]

"when these guys left she told them to take their kids" .... this made me actually howl-laugh. Loves it.

[@rubysbaby822]

@@shopece8807 I might have paraphrased but essentially that’s what happened all 3 times. 🤣🤣

[@NamasteInYourLane]

I'm not leaving my daughter's with no man. If marriage is your goal, having a baby first is a bad move.

[@shopece8807]

@@rubysbaby822 "hey, while you're leaving take him/her with you" lol.

[@rubysbaby822]

@@NamasteInYourLane girl no one asked you and like the video said you shouldn’t have a kid with ANYONE you can’t leave them with boy or girl. Death happens you may leave without it being a choice. They should’ve chose better. They’re the single dads. 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@MissJ619]

They say they want them so badly, an can raise them better, so have them, gone with ya pappy.

[@attitudeproblem6462]

They bank on a mother’s instinct to keep her enslaved. Glad We’re refusing to fall for it anymore!!❤

[@FoAl-h2b]

What about their " fathering instinct" ?

[@tsarinastevens9447]

@@FoAl-h2bthey aren’t taught to have empathy unless it’s for other grown men.

[@LisaSoulLevelHealing]

I never understood women letting a man get kids every other weekend. I think TF NOT! Take this child, i need my own time thank you very much.

[@Decadence13666]

One woman that my mom worked with gave the kid to the dad every weekend. Father would pick the kid up from school on Friday. They would spend the weekend together while mom was living her best life. Then he would drop the kid off the school on Monday and the mom would pick the kid up from school on Monday. If she wanted to do something with the kid on the weekend then dad would get the weekdays too. And mom would pick the kid up on Friday and spend time on the weekends. She was vary insistent on the fact that he was a parent and would spend as much time with his son as possible

[@ihanakaunotar2741]

@@Decadence13666sounds like both parents were doing parenting properly

[@Childfree334]

Every day when I log into social media, no matter what platform it is, I am SO THANKFUL to be childfree. Y'all make motherhood look like the most miserable endeavor on Earth, and I'm not even talking about the kids. I'm talking about dealing with these men. I just can't be bothered to bring that kind of misery into my life.

[@theladynextdoor313]

Agreed. They all seem very miserable. I want no parts of it. SMDH.

[@imajinallthepurple]

Preach! I'm a proud fur baby momma and that's enough for me.

[@SoFetch0]

Being a mother is wonderful and hard. It’s not miserable. It shows you how strong you are .

[@Bodytheliz]

Child free asf sis

[@saramatthews7159]

I agree...I'm 40 and have never desired to be a mother...just looks horrible/exhausting. These "fathers" get off with doing the bare minimum.

[@ninaj.4885]

So a deadbeat mother is one that shares custody, lets the child live with the father, and pays him child support?...........mmmm wow, I wish I had a deadbeat baby mama instead of a deadbeat baby daddy if that's what they consider deadbeat.

[@roccafille]

🤣🤣

[@hourexodus5204]

Right. 😂😂😂 even the deadbeat bar is higher for women. If that was a man he would be considered a great father. 😅

[@ceenichole6866]

They can’t think of a reason why women can’t leave kids with their dad. Society expects women to completely immerse themselves in being a mother and it’s not a personality

[@l-pv5793]

Those man calling her deadbeat are the same ones saying they would love to be a house husband 😂😂😂 funny

[@AmberColeman-gq1wn]

Exactly talking about some “Drizzle, drizzle”.. LOL just stupid smh

[@llechatton]

When they say that their mothers did this or grandma did that… remind them that their mothers were property of their fathers and husbands but you are not. That’s the difference. Not a man’s property and you own your own life.

[@flutatious_music4]

It does take TWO. If he doesn’t wanna hold up the end of the deal, he can have those kids. Women always play a huge part in raising kids. It’s the men’s turn to step up. Good luck, gentlemen!💅🏾

[@neema1]

I've always said this, he is an equal parent. Give him HIS children

[@lemoncholyme]

All these men swear they're the best father so they should keep their kids.

[@shontaer96]

My daughter is 23 & she told me that if she ever have a baby & the the daddy leaves her, then he's going to be a single father cuz she's giving him the baby

[@jayogee913]

The "single step-girlfriend/momma" is ON POINT! That's why I wouldn't date a dude who has kids. I'm not an unpaid babysitter/nanny/mommy. My best friend in high school started dating a dude ten years older than her who had two kids, and SHE BABYSAT HIS KIDS WHILE HE WENT OUT AND PARTIED!! Even at 18 I knew how d*mb she was for doing that. I just shook my head at her, but she was infatuated and love bombed by him.

[@pgdarling301]

I know that's right, not me girl!

[@ihanakaunotar2741]

Wow she was naive as hell

[@jayogee913]

@@ihanakaunotar2741 She wanted a boyfriend and to get married more than anything else in her life. Fine, to each her own. But it made her so desperate!! If any dude spent five seconds of attention on her, she followed him around like a lost puppy!

[@shauntikayvette]

I have seen this backfire a couple times. My cousin has gone no contact with his mother who was very supportive, attentive and set him up for success and allowed her son to live with his father during high school and he was poisoned against her despite the fact that he spent the last 2 years of high school back with her after the dad broke up with the girlfriend they were living with. He was able to go to school on a full academic scholarship on top of sport scholarship offers due to all the attention and resources she poured into him. A bitter man can turn your child bitter as well.

[@LisaSoulLevelHealing]

Probably still worth it. That's his problem and his healing. Maybe she should have let him stay with the dad and let him do it all.

[@hardcandy71287]

so did the dad send the kid back only because he broke up with his girlfriend? sounds like the dad no longer had help, he didn't want to take care of him alone.

[@grendels_mother]

Tbh that’s the son’s problem not the mother. She tried her best 🤷🏾‍♀️

[@bournegod_kiy]

It’s going to take a sec, but he will realize it. Reality is, a lot of children resent their mothers that raise them and blame them for everything. It’s really, damned if you do, damned if you don’t. I mean, chose the lesser of the 2 evils.

[@mikochild2]

Sounds like her son's problem. They can end up hating you even if you have them. He's grown now and her responsibility is over.

[@anonymoususer4866]

It’s legit easier and cheaper to be the noncustodial 😂

[@shopece8807]

Men's rights groups should love this....right?! :---)

[@PrettyDope]

Good! They always hollering single mother homes have the worst outcomes so there should be ZERO smoke when giving them to the daddy.

[@hayaq9991]

Kayla Nicole was always ahead of her time

[@djbee8888]

Mmm what a day to post this video. I go to court in about 45 mins and it's about this lol

[@Priscilla_Boye]

I wish you all the best I hope it works out in your favour ❤️❤️❤️

[@flutatious_music4]

I hope it goes well!❤️

[@MsFadir]

Fingers crossed dj bee 🙏🏾

[@chanmit4930]

I hope it all goes well.x

[@arialindsey1811]

Any updates?

[@comkver]

The best part of this is that it teaches the men the hard truth right away: the women do everything! The infamous unseen work that women do, BAM seen. My father learned that lesson when his first wife left him with two girls under four. He had to drag them to work everywhere. Eventually, he had to bribe his sister and mom with a house to help raise the kids. Guess what he did after that? He got with another woman and had another kid. They broke up and he left to the US. He got with my mom so when he'd tell her that they were breaking up and could keep us he already knew what it meant to have full time custody of the kids. Think about it he'd have custody of children around eight and seven, older than the first two kids when he got them.

[@MsFadir]

(This is your father and I mean absolutely no disrespect 🙏🏾) I had to laugh when I read he left the US. Like, no way he was going through that again. He knew how much work it was first hand 🤭

[@LaShawnDenise]

Love to see it! I sent my boys with their dad last year. 13 & 8. I’ve done all the nurturing. Dad got to spend his 20’s focusing on progressing in his career/working overseas & now it’s my turn to focus on me. They are with me for the summer and then back to dads for the school year. & I get them every other weekend during the year/all school breaks. They have really been thriving. I can go on and on lol. It was hard at first but now, Tuh! No one can shame me 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@blaackberry]

I'm so glad this is catching on because I believe in this 100% LEAVE THEM KIDS WITH THEY DADDY AND DIP!!

[@ILOVESOFE]

I absolutely gave my ex-husband custody of our son.Because he was a great father in a terrible husband! I spent that time going to school and starting my own business so that now my son has something to be inspired by.

[@ILOVESOFE]

Pardon typos I'm voice texting😂

[@kiatequila424]

I don't have kids, I am a professional nanny. I've always said "oh he'll be taking this kid too"! Men need to be responsible too! I'm not finna give up my life while he in the club! You doing this too!

[@shanellem6310]

My ex-husband convinced our son hat he should live with him in 8th grade. So, I sent our son to him in 9th grade. Now, my ex is forced to get a job and work. Teenage boys eat- A LOT. So, he doesn't have a choice. Our son's grades plummeted. I get on our son and he visots me 2 weeks out of the month; but, his Dad offers no consequences. So, it is what it is. My son will be a Senior in HS and 18yrs old at graduation. I let him know that he needs to make some decisions about his life. After graduation, he needs to either work, go to school, or both. He decided to join the Marines. I will support him 100%.

[@ihanakaunotar2741]

He’ll realize when he’s older

[@Sarah-gm9tq]

You’re a bad parent. Just leaving him to the wolves is not it. You made a bad decision making a child w your dusty man. I feel so bad for your kid. You two set him up to fail. Shame on you

[@lunarrobot9714]

​@@Sarah-gm9tq Did you just ignore that the son wanted to live with the dad? Yet you're still finding a way to blame her for everything and calling her bad parent for not FORCING her teenage son to stay with her.

[@ellanina801]

The marines sounds like a good move for him after that. He will need a lot of emotional support after that tho (my bro is retired marines).

[@anjeliom.m8685]

It’s easier to pay child support. Being a parent is work!

[@esmeralda6111]

Any time I hear American women speaking about their marriages, child Custody and so on I thank to the God I live in Europe. A share custody is a default.

[@frozenheart7133]

It's technically the default here too, it's just that often it's decided out of court by whatever the kids are used to, or it's decided that way because the mom has concerns about the kids being alone with dad for too long, so they ask for more custody and the dad doesn't fight it. Recently a study in MA discovered that 94% of the time father's ask for custody, they get it.

[@DrKrysRacquel]

@@frozenheart7133likely when they ask I assume it’s for a serious situation…where they can’t sit back…or perhaps those men asking have great finances. I’d love to know more about the study

[@canesugar911]

​@@DrKrysRacquel most times, I don't think they want the kids

[@DrKrysRacquel]

@@canesugar911 Yes for sure! I agree.

[@esmeralda6111]

@@frozenheart7133 so it`ws not by default. I know americans are very much patriarchal so u need so much time to educate your men and law system.

[@angelawilliams5153]

When I was about 23 (30 years ago) I thought I was pregnant. I told the gentleman that I was not ready to be a mother and that I was going to give the baby up for adoption. He did not want me to do that. He wanted me to keep the baby. I told him I was definitely not ready to be a mother, but if he wanted the baby, I would not fight. He did not want that. He wanted me to keep the baby. I told him if you want to keep the baby that’s great, but I am not gonna Be a full-time mom just so you can be a weekend dad. Faithfully it ended up being a false alarm and about three days later on my cycle started….

[@tinkerbellrochester7021]

My daughter shares custody with her sons father. It works well for them.

[@ihanakaunotar2741]

Some men are good partners and fathers. That is if you’re lucky

[@Caram3l_Bombsh3ll]

I don’t blame these women. For the longest, mothers have been unappreciated while being blamed for every negative outcome. My mom literally said, “when you leave, take your kids with you”.

[@fivemargaritasonly]

Ive been saying this forever and got called cruel and heartless. Lol its not abandonment, its shifting responsibility to the father. If i was a single mom, id just pay my child support and do visitation with NO shame!

[@abbagailmarie9874]

I am also in this situation. I am an American who had a child with a European man. she was born in Europe and raised her first four years in Europe. Toward the end of the relationship he started using very manipulative tactics, saying for me to "leave back to the states" and to "leave my daughter with him" and said things like "I hate Americans" (which is hilarious because our daughter is legally an American as well and has a passport, etc) so I used my nifty nifty masters degree and went and got a job in another country within Europe. I left him and he had the AUDACITY to act surprised. I pay child support on time and I see my daughter for 1 month every summer and on Christmas and some odd weekends when I fly back and forth. He has his mother, his grandma, his friends, his staff - he has a PHD and is a geneticist - meanwhile I was a foreigner and had no one. It was THE BEST decision I ever made. It was difficult, because I love my daughter to DEATH and I was a stay at home mom with her for four years, day in day out, but it was worth it to save myself. NEVER let a man sand you down, tear you down to the studs... You are important too!!!

[@shauntikayvette]

There is nuance in every relationship. For some being with the father is better and for some it is deadly

[@sbinti1152]

So true. It sounds ideal to leave kids with the father. I couldn't ' do that as I know for a fact my ex would not have been able to deal with the stress and would have treated them horribly!

[@Bubileaf]

It’s still a woman’s issue even if custody goes to the father. It will fall on his Grandmothers, Mothers, Sisters, Aunts lap. The only thing Men are good at is shirking responsibility and accountability. Womenfolk family of single fathers need to create strong boundaries and stay in their lane or they’ll be exploited. Don’t be saving anyone from their Karma.

[@00samira00]

It might be but the fathers will still have to do more than they would have done. And seeing more and more single fathers in society might make people realise that men taking care of their children regardless if they are together with the mother should be expected. And even might make them be raised to actually expect having to take care of others.

[@Gabster1990]

She's lucky she has a supportive ex. Most fathers do not ask for custody.

[@solaris5922]

@@redgoddess why would you hand your child over to a man that doesn’t want them?

[@biblethumper8088]

​@@solaris5922because it's his child

[@mimi42428]

​@@solaris5922 this is what people aren't understanding.

[@wilson8979]

They don’t want the kids. Trust me. Men are the most selfish people

[@jewelrybeekay8637]

@@mimi42428 Oh they can 😂 just like the majority of us have no choice but to PARENT when we’re left to do it ALONE… Throw them kids on him just like they do us, easy 🤷🏾‍♀️. Ya’ll better start moving like them, unless he’s a serial killer them kids gone be IGHT even if he said “No 🥺”… yeah me too niqqa NO 👹 I’m leaving them at his mother’s doorstep, Child support me plzzz tuh!

[@roshellegouldbourne787]

I mean the idea is good, BUT let's be real. His Sister, Mother Aunt is the one taking care of the children.

[@TKOin2life]

They need to say no.

[@LisaSoulLevelHealing]

That works too 🤷🏾‍♀️ they are well taken care of because of women are socialized to provide for the men. Let them, that's more for your child when she is with him.

[@Shannon-gr7rm]

I agree. That's why single parenthood is easier for men. It's also easier for men to find a new reliable partner.

[@shopece8807]

@@TKOin2life period.

[@amberinthemist7912]

Maybe the women in his life will stop being doormats then and tell him to man up.

[@FreckledOne-d2e]

I did that 25 years ago. I couldn't bring myself to have an abortion, so I gave full custody to the father. I maintained contact, sent child support, and he was on my health/dental insurance until he aged out. We don't have the closest relationship, but we respect each other and talk at least once a month.

[@kendraluce5777]

Ladies normalize giving these kids to the father!! Im recently divorced (he divorced me because he couldnt handle it.. whatever that means) and we have 50/50 custody. I have her 7 days then he has her 7 days and it is the best thing ever! He thought he was gonna just divorce me and leave me with a child while he does whatever. I said absolutely not. I told him I dont need child support you can just take care of your child 50% of the time. He is pissed but its bliss for me because i actually get more help and support now that im divorced and its in writing with the courts that he actually has to help take care of his kid half of the time.

[@LisaSoulLevelHealing]

Weekend mom here! What are you waiting for? Unless he is absusive 🤷🏾‍♀️ he's better at getting her to school on time anyways, im always late. I find it gives him structure and purpose as a man, and he stays in one place unlike me.

[@uspeak7]

NOT EVERY WOMAN HAVE THE OPTION OF LEAVING THEIR CHILDREN WITH THE DAD THANK GOD FOR THE FEW THAT DO 🙌🙌🙌 CHOOSE WISELY LADIES

[@jwalka534]

I wouldn't put myself on child support but we would definitely be sharing custody....

[@millionairemoney9922]

If he wants the kids just to avoid child support, I'd be careful. My sons father was horrible to him

[@Magestik8]

Wow 🤯 how did you handle that

[@ihanakaunotar2741]

Did the kid learn what their dad was like?

[@lashwithlex]

The lady in my pink is speaking facts !!! When my parents divorced, my dad instantly married a woman in her 20s who was a doctor with no kids. She tried to win us over and take us away from our mom so we will like her. Eventually, my dad did her the same way he did my mom. Gave her 2 kids and became not shit

[@HyacinthCleveland]

Older brother didn't raise his first two kids, their mom did , they are both successful, for his third kid and second divorce, he was forced to raise this one, she is a disaster with guidance from my brother, some father's are not good at being a parent.

[@kittenkat5244]

That's why males need to be held accountable and fathers getting custody needs to be normalized so they start learning to do better.

[@youllbemytourniquet]

I’m so glad more women have this mentality. It’s okay to focus on yourself!

[@NamasteInYourLane]

If you want to focus on yourself, why have children in the first place? This is so backwards. Women act like they HAVE to have children. You don't.

[@NG-th8ny]

@@NamasteInYourLane Unfortunately, things (men) change unexpectedly, therefore, women need to be able to change their plans too.

[@knowledgeisablessing8767]

Single step girlfriend mother is WILD 😂

[@212Brittany]

Very

[@fancybeingawesome]

@@knowledgeisablessing8767 Coz what 😂😂😂

[@astridsass1910]

Crazy work.

[@cindybaker8361]

My ex gets a new one every year 😂

[@shopece8807]

I was saying before even that Kayla Nicole girl's situation GIVE THESE KIDS TO THEIR FATHERS! ✌🏽💅🏽

[@AG-iu9lv]

Same! I'm so happy to see it being talked about in public! ❤

[@shopece8807]

@@AG-iu9lv :---)

[@beowulf4201]

I have put together a contract even for my dating life and all my friends called me crazy when I said if my man leaves me after been together and created a family, I am giving him the kids. He can take them all and I will pay the child support because I ain’t gone waste my life. GIVE THEM TO THE FATHERS

[@napturallydd83]

Chile!!! … I have definitely thought about giving my son to his father for a while so I can reset! But his daddy has anger issues and I dnt want my baby subjected to that behavior…

[@MusicLoverJenny]

I had said this on Reddit and people came for me like I am a monster like damn if I chose the man he is financially responsible and a good man to raise children. They are better if with him because I would not want my kids to struggle like I did growing up. This though is the reason I don’t have kids. Unless the day come they a good responsible man comes around it’s not happening, i rather stay single. Worse case we split he takes the kids as he is responsible and can manage it. The struggle is real out here for woman with kids alone.

[@nak1707]

It is not so easy. Women instinctively know where their kids are the safest. Sometimes it is better to struggle to avoid child abuse. Yes, women should pick safer men, but many men hide their true personalities until after they are married.

[@stephkais5613]

Men say fathers are meeting parental responsibilities by paying child support and maintaining visitation. Time for the uno reverse. Give men those babies! Mothers you can pat yourself on the back for meeting parental responsibilities by giving $200 a month and being the fun visitation mom.

[@bubblesactivated]

I wouldn’t mind my sons father to take him half the time. The problem is he’s lazy and has so many women around and I’m not feeling that at all.

[@NurseKayP]

I think one of the takeaways is if you gave him his son he wouldn’t have time for all the ladies and he would be forced to actually step up. Kind of like us mothers just step up and do what we have to do whether we have help or not because it is what is needed. But believe me I know where you are coming from. My daughter’s father is too self centered to be a full time or half time dad. He is barely a dad. One time he had an extended visit over the summer for a few weeks and people were worried about what if he don’t give her back, but I was never worried cause I know he is incapable and would be ready to give her back by the end of the visit 😂

[@Magestik8]

@@NurseKayPum no he most likely would have the baby with another woman

[@angelawilkins1740]

I don't understand what the problem is. Don't they want their equal rights? Well now they have it.

[@shebasamused]

They should look at the rate of abuse between fathers and mothers and maybe don’t have kids

[@ianimal36]

The men will keep taking you to court, making changes to the custody agreement, the kids will be like ping pong balls, back and forth, so giving them custody allows the children to have a stable lifestyle, stay in one primary home without having a parent use them as a pawn in the court system. Women aren't trying to "bury" the father's of their children, women are trying to survive and help their children to thrive while men actively make everything more difficult and worse than they need to be. Men have lost the plot completely.

[@newstart1847]

Woman will never win if you hold the child back you’re bad , but if you give custody you’re also bad ?! Live your life people fuck what others think

[@shadamyrulezz13]

Yeah like we are indoctrinated here in US to be independent. My siblings have all had to move to afford buying houses and they all had to move away from their village. So its harder for my parents and I to help them when there is an emergency

[@NurseKayP]

Women need to start normalizing this instead of us feeling like we have to be the one to struggle on our own. We have been conditioned to think it is just a given that if the relationship ends we will automatically have the children. Even when the dad just switches up and walks out they know we will keep the kids so it makes it much easier for them to walk out without any worries. They can just do whatever they want and know their kids are taken care of. These men would be more careful about where they spread their seed and the decisions they make once the children are here or on the way if they knew their was a good possibility they would end up with the children.

[@melissabrooks8555]

I remember a few years ago I met a woman in her late 30s whose children lived on the east coast with their dad. I was taken aback at first, not cuz I judged her but I had literally just never thought of this as a possibility. It must have planted a seed as now I’m in my 30s and going to law school in another country next year and I am leaving my son with his dad 😂

[@professorh7024]

I love that younger women are having this discussion! Keep going ladies! 💃🏽💃🏽

[@arcticprowl971]

This reminds me of that reddit post where the father fought and manipulated the kids so he and his new wife could get full custody. And she had to downsize to a one bedroom apartment to pay for child support. Summer ends and the kids are like oh shit dad's useless I wanna go back home with mom. And mom's like no I don't have room sorry. And everyone said she was wrong because she was living her best life.

[@fancybeingawesome]

@@arcticprowl971 wanna read it so bad😂😂

[@LoveAndSnapple]

Don’t they tell us that men are better single parents, anyway? I see the answer to a very solvable problem. If they want to be regarded as father of the year or #1 dad then they have to earn it.

[@noonereally4798]

Some people are just mad that they have the option to take a break from being the default parent, because they don’t have that option because their ex is trash.

[@Morgan24_7]

In all honesty. I'm here for it. ALL my life I've always seen it be the mother for the most part. Interesting change.

[@jillmac2000]

One big thing people seem to be forgetting is just because someone is a poor relationship partner does not automatically make them a poor parent.

[@lbolen4304]

I remember my moms partner got upset once at her leaving him with my lil brother to “babysit him” and just that kind of language told me a lot about how he thinks. My man your not babysitting that is your child!!! You SHOULD be watching him!! He’s a lot better about it now

[@roxannemorrow6859]

My sons went to live with their dad at age 8 and 6 and I paid child support. This was a mutual decision based on their well being, not because I'm a bad mom quite the opposite but because he wanted them and he could teach them to be men. Everything worked out wonderfully for all of us. Our sons are now 21 and 23 and are thriving, well adjusted young men living their best lives. I was always involved and they spent the entire summer with me as well as spring break. Our situation may be different because their dad and I were amicable and mature and no courts were involved. There was no maliciousness and everything was done out of love for the two little lives we brought into this world. Having my sons live with their dad allowed me to excel in my career and better my financial situation which in turn has benefitted our sons. My ex husband had a great support system and he was also able to excel in his career. We married at 20 had our first son at 21. I hear so much bitterness in some of these women and I understand why because their children's fathers sound like they are not taking an active role and that really sucks.

[@bootscooty]

I love success stories like this. Maturity all around

[@astrohitter1791]

I love the 2024 chapter of Being Female!

[@wanjirunjoroge5942]

I support 100% they keep saying children need their fathers and single mothers are 'bad' parents. I raised my daughter for 10yrs and then her dad asked if she can live with him since she has a younger half sister and i agreed. 6yrs now.

[@stilljocelyn_]

I’d rather pay child support, get the kids on weekends and be considered the fun parent. Especially if I had sons!

[@imajinallthepurple]

Mommy or daddy, it shouldn't make any difference. Anything else is sexist imo. But why don't people just mind their business and leave the parenting solution up to - oh, I don't know - the parents?! 🙄

[@mikochild2]

Um...we can't discuss problems and potential solutions so women who think they have to keep the kid because they are women will know they have options? Maybe I misread your comment

[@the_gifted_thrifter3217]

Kevin Samuels use to always tell women to give the kids the to the dad. Told single moms they were used up and unwanted. Y’all thought he spoke the truth and nothing else. Women are damned if they do and damned if they don’t. Make up y’all’s mind. 🙄

[@vapx0075]

So long as he's a normal person who could care for them responsibly. If he's an idiot or a toxic rage machine, nfw.

[@crescentmoon2374]

I do think women should just start giving their kids to their fathers. So that atleast than people can stop arguing about how bad single mothers are. Just be a fun weekend parent. And let the dad do all the hard stuff. I use to have a teacher who has full custody of his daughters and gets stressed with dealing with his daughters and have issues with them. But their mom is living her own life. If these red pill men constantly complain about women and minimize all the things women do and what they experience let the man deal with the kids. Since they complain about custody of the kids.

[@Esme26433]

I’m the weekend parent. It’s glorious!!

[@Priscilla_Boye]

❤️❤️❤️

[@Coco-nq3vg]

My dad was on speed dial everytime i wanted to leave my mother's house. She wouldn't even fight for me to stay 😂😂 i grew up in two homes

[@LoveAndSnapple]

Mom’s aren’t “the ones that stayed“ they’re the ones that got left holding the bag. Give a woman a chance to abandon ship or at least set up a co-parenting situation that favors her and she’ll do that. You’re literally holding the bag from inception while his two legs are the getaway car.

[@ebonysearcy4626]

I was raised by a single dad and I love him for it.

[@themacandcheese2240]

Did this and have been out casted and shamed by women. Didn’t know he would get extremely bitter and not let me see my daughter and strain our relationship. So now I’m the lady who abandoned her kid. Wow

[@kittenkat5244]

He cant interfere with court mandated visitation. Keep taking him to court and ignore those people cause they aint paying ur bills.

[@grendels_mother]

Tbh f those women think, they rather be the struggling ones who take all the childbearing responsibilities and let the man be lazy

[@itsmainelyyou5541]

This is called shared responsibility. This is what being a parent is. These men fathered these children. They can share the same amount of responsibility. I don't understand the response to the one woman whose support system is back in Alabama. She should be congratulated. She put her children and their stability first. No one would bat an eye at that where I'm from. In fact if she _hadn't_ they'd have things to say about it. It doesn't make sense.

[@juniorlsdmusic]

Lol duh! It was about time, they complain that moms keep them away from their kids so let them raise them, take them to school, cook, clean after them, go to doctor's appointments, etc.