Will my avoidant ex come back?

[@tillarman]

If someone did not choose you once you need to remove your time, attention and affection like they never exist while relentlessly working on yourself. Only then you will recognize they are not special, what makes them special were only your feelings. This will allow you to be objective as possible if they want to return in your life. Then in case you decide to give a second chance you will not make it easy for them, because you will own your life… Test them, see their actions, not their words and if they not invest into you and do not want to communicate properly, dump them right on spot. Otherwise you are setting yourself for emotional abuse, unnecessary anxiety and second disregard. Good luck folks, stand your ground and God bless you all 🍀

[@andziagreen4922]

Very well said👏 I now see him for who he is and not my fantasy about him but it took me over a year. I took him off his pedestal, went 100% no contact but never received sincere apology for sudden discard even tho we met twice during some local events. That's my answer. Never again. This person is immature and emotionally unsafe for me.

[@tillarman]

@@andziagreen4922some people belong to the streets, and we need to accept it 😊 love, commitment has a price, therefore if you are this type of individual you should put high price on yourself and do not allow to be drained by some broken individual. Your time and energy are gifts, and they are limited. The things to which they are given will determine our emotional state and existence. She is constantly stalking me on social media in the last two months so she probably enjoys the show 😂

[@Assdfgresa]

Your so wise, thank you for writing that out

[@Assdfgresa]

It was a little complicated because she was my employee also. She was slacking and not performing good. So I had to get rid of her for that and it was a good exploit to get her out of that makes sence

[@tillarman]

@@Assdfgresa Most men think they can control the situation if they are constantly be masculine, establishing boundaries etc. but if she is not mature, insecure, or even worse broken by past relationships guess what you are doomed. Your masculinity and frame with be seen as a threat to her freedom and will trigger her mental issues. Why I am saying this is because I am Alfa and my last breakup was for the exact same shits.. Leave up control focus on relentless improvement and never ever let a woman to take you out of your energy. She need to invest time and energy into you and deserve it! Otherwise gentlemen sorry to say it but you are in a fake relationship basically alone forcing things to happen which always leads to blindsiding, ignorance and dumping.

[@LorenaBerrenbaum]

Avoidant are scary the fact that they can just switch off their emotions like they are completely different person after the discard. It's makes me sick to stomach to think he was such a gentle soul that needs unconditional love. Not demonize them but never put yourself in such terrible situations and mental gymnastics ever.

[@sf808opalaman]

Avoidants can not self reflect, avoids accountability, and has poor emotional communication skills. So they’re not really “turning off” their emotions. What they ARE good at is ‘mirroring’ their emotions. They mirror OUR emotions and feelings. But when they realize this leads to required deep emotional connection, they are triggered and don’t want that. They don’t know how to emotionally connect and they start backing off… (With out healing, it becomes the beginning of the end)

[@MissSarahGM]

Coming back like the break up didn't happen. I responded to his sporadic calls for a year. I always responded hopeful, but he was only keeping me in his orbit for a year, not trying to see me or repair. I finally received more vulnerable and nostalgic messages, but because there was no real accountability for what he did, nor real apology - it sounded too self-focused and not showing change. I ignored to see if he would try again and say more. He has not. I guess he felt rejected and wanted an easy victory, not to fight for me, not convince me, because he was not even convinced himself of what he wanted with me.

[@Artiahcb]

The exact same thing is happening with me now. I am hoping for a change. It’s been 6 months since our breakup and he keeps coming back (I know because I let him) but I’ve decided to block him. My question is do they even change or should I move on? (He asked me to block him and move on)

[@MissSarahGM]

@@Artiahcb Watch Ryan's video on enabling the avoidant. They change only if they want to, if a major loss occurs and most won't. That's why you need to set higher boundaries, and stop being easy to access. Because that will only enable him and devalue you in his eyes. Remember he doesn't need more than a fill up of connection and reassurance. You need more. If he asked you to block him listen to him and don't answer his reach out, so that he sees consequences to his actions. And try to move on in the meantime. I know it sucks, but even after over a year, I knew my ex had not possibly changed. I had always replied, he had the power, he wanted less I wanted more. It's not possible they change without a big humbling event and therapy. And years.

[@gigibtsurvivor3348]

He came back once. I don’t expect him to come back again because he knows my boundaries and the respect I know I deserve. He is a good person; just not in a place ready to heal for himself. I wish him nothing but clarity, healing, and happiness.

[@LivyWithWhiskey]

Thank you so much for the daily posts. You are keeping me strong on no contact. I was discarded a week after “let’s have a baby and I want to marry you”. I’m the problem, of course. Now I’m iced out and blocked on everything. It hurt like hell

[@jchula]

They're emotional abusers as narcissists/borderliners etc. ! The problem is that even if you try to hold them accountable- they don't really care. It's just a fasade. And most deny therapy. They can play the victim role often times well. What bothers me is that domestic violence abusers get often jail time etc...but emotional abusers walk around and damage good people without be hold accountable.

[@musicbrazilian7065]

They allways do come back no need to pursue them, however dump them and find someone else.

[@jordantewari]

I wonder sometimes. But only time will tell.

[@13sprintuser]

even female?

[@musicbrazilian7065]

@@13sprintuser Find another girl take a photo beside her put it in your social media, she will become possesive and back to you in no time.

[@sj3969]

@@13sprintuserfemale DA, I went back once that was a decade ago. It ended shortly after. Any connection I’ve had since then I’ve never gone back but only because those men weren’t people with similar values or life goals. No reason to go back to that

[@Lostandtobefound]

Haha. Not always

[@fruitypopwhickle6806]

Noppity nope! Took 6 years of going on the crazy merry-go-round to finally realize what was going on! The avoidant I dealt with was also a covert narc... 1 year, 10 months of peace, joy, clarity and healing. ❤❤❤

[@pacifist_SA]

I love your videos! They're so easy to comprehend and informative . can you speak more about anxious attachment style and how to manage the neediness for reassurance and constant communication?

[@vampy7966]

If you’re with an avoidant? Sorry to say but you will keep putting an avoidant off. Best thing to do is learn to love yourself. Give the love you’re dying to give to someone else to yourself. Ask yourself why or where this is need is coming from & work on healing from those wounds…

[@pacifist_SA]

@@vampy7966 I love myself but bc of my anxious attachment style, I feel an urge to communicate daily with the one I have feelings for. unfortunately, it does push them away and it hurts so much but I'm working on myself to get better and heal

[@vampy7966]

@@pacifist_SA I’m sorry you’re hurting like that. I understand because at some point in my life where my anxious side was heavily in swing, I pushed for things in the relationship because that’s what I learnt from seeing other couples etc instead of letting things come together organically.. I reflect so much on past relationships & how I don’t want to be again or what I don’t want to repeat & how I can grow from that. These days I swing heavily on the avoidant side thought my anxious side does get triggered, I look at ways to work on what’s coming up for me. I’m by far not perfect only being new to attachment styles & making sense of things after walking around my whole life thinking something was wrong with me. It’s gonna take a lot of work but I have to keep reminding myself that I have to learn to build myself up to stand on my own & fill my own cup before someone comes along who would like to add to my cup & also have theirs filled from mine. This also helps you recover from future break ups because you still need to be you’re whole self if someone leaves because in essence they should only be taking themselves away not a part of you too.. Maybe make a list of things you need to do around the house that you’ve been putting off & everytime you feel the urge to make that phone call you get stuck into one of the items on the list to deflect from your urge to call? Might not be helpful but could be. It’s a matter of occupying your mind with other things & this way you’re helping yourself..

[@pacifist_SA]

@@vampy7966 yes I'm trying to do this and get busy with something else and fight that urge to send a msg. Sometimes I win others I don't but I'll keep trying. Eventually I'll move on after making sure he's not good for me .

[@chelseajackman7730]

Once you've lost the love of your life, nobody else matters and you can watch them all come and go like ships in the harbor and barely shed a tear.

[@tomtraveltigard]

I think the better question is, why would you have them back after being dumped & discarded in such a callus way & hurtful way??? I've never felt to wounded, and by somebody that was in my view totally incapable of such a thing... I'd have a very hard time trusting them.. .

[@saxonpete5131]

I've come to the same conclusion myself. She showed the real person. The woman I thought was my ideal partner was triggered over nothing, flicked a switch and turned into a cold hearted, ruthless psychopath. Yes the trust would be a deal breaker for me, you would never know when they would be triggered again and flick that cold hearted switch again. The other deal breaker for me was that she confessed 6 months into our relationship (when she knew I was emotionally invested) that she'd had a long term affair with a work colleague in the relationship with the father of her children. Once a cheat always a cheat. She's done me a huge favour, I've dodged a missile.

[@ajibuwamiracle836]

It was through this channel @droman01 I restore my relationship back in 24 hours

[@hallumilimna8655]

I ask myself the same question but it's so hard to ignore the way my heart skips a beat every time I see his text (which is almost non-existent now) He's made me feel so worthless but I can't seem to stop caring about him. Every single memory of him hits me like a train out of nowhere at the most random times and it hurts so much cuz he's like an entirely different person now. I'm literally mourning the person I fell for. I miss him so much

[@ditaz2378]

So well said❤ I am choosing myself...I want love no pain and broken heart😢. Thank you 😊

[@guywithahelmet9597]

Idk if my ex was avoidant or FA/DA. I know that she didn’t like conflict and any difficult conversations were a no go for her. Is she coming back? I don’t think so. She even said that she wasn’t going to text me or anything. Idk at this point to be honest. I hope she’s happy. God bless her.

[@vixter28]

Same definitely an avoidant I’m not sure which one but when he gets mad at somebody, he kicks them off the island and he doesn’t talk to them again so I don’t think he’s ever gonna contact me again

[@jamie-r2034]

Mine was the same way. We were together for 12 years & have a daughter. She knows she has issues but I cant help her fix herself. She also broke it off with me by a text message. Nice huh?? After about 6 weeks, we started to text a little and even had Thanksgiving as a "family" instead of our original plan with separate things. She's been showing me more affection & now gives me hugs when I stop to see my daughter. She will go with her girl friend on Saturday nights to get out of the house so I stay there with my daughter and when she gets home early the next day we hang out together for awhile. Unfortunately, she gives mixed signals so after the holidays are over, I plan on completely moving forward with my life & if she can help herself, Id glad to TRY to work something out slowly. I was great to her & she knows this, however, looking back now all I did was give and got nothing back in return so a lot will have to change

[@KVG822]

The avoidant wanted me to end things with him and move on and he had to tell me that he will reach out when he can and he hasn’t contacted me in 4 /5 months.

[@jordantewari]

It’s a nightmare. I keep thinking this can’t be real. But it is.

[@Kimberlyelayyne]

Are we dating the same man? Mine said the same thing.

[@andziagreen4922]

Never disrespect yourself by waiting for anyone

[@michaella5799]

Easy poontang has no value

[@LamaCreative]

He also said he will reach out when he can and in a “little while”…it’s been almost 2 months…so I guess it’s still not soon enough to hear back. Ugh

[@malaprop4156]

Someone I met online pursued me hard, complimented me like no other, made me feel like an angel, insisted on a relationship, finally, when I developed feelings, he dropped me like a hot potato. When I reached out, he claimed he was busy with work. Very reluctant to communicate. Then it tapered off. I reached out after a while to see how he was doing as he had health issues, insisting it can only be friendship, but he again pursued me hard, showered me with praise & love, said he thought of me every day, demanded a relationship and said we are in for the long haul. I fell for him again, and then it's like a switch flipped & he's cold. No messages, barely any replies, then he left 2 messages unread over a week, when I deleted those and sent a basic text asking how he was doing, he blocked me! I'm still reeling. Wtf happened? Did he mean anything he said? Why did he do this?

[@Bluepearl187]

From what I’ve seen from my ex, he sweet talks women online for validation and attention. Tells them he is single and lives alone when in reality, his pregnant girlfriend lives with him.

[@dennisjasonbago3659]

I had someone like this, that person came back to me 5th time. I may be easy to forgive and my patience is wide enough but there is breaking point. But the time I reached that breaking point. I have to say stop for a while before coming back.

[@KristenCalle]

The avoidant sucker punched me by the break up- supposed to get married next month Took every pic of us off his social like I never existed Glad to learn this mental illness behind it

[@janicealkire4076]

Thank you for a wonderful explanation. Its sad for them. I hope for my avoidant to find his peace.

[@1224polo]

I dont believe that avoidant attachement style can be changed though therapy. Even if, when the therapy will be over they will be back to the same cycle sooner or later.

[@Divinelyprotected-c2w]

I couldn’t take it more he broke my heart he came back once this would be de o d time I truly loved him yes he ran from problems he told me how much he loved me

[@macdavy70]

I've had a FA in my life for 6 years, I can tell you from the 4th or 5th discard, its like clock work, she will last 2 to 3 months before slowly testing the waters again, the last few times I just tried to do a friendship but because she get emotionally connected to me or if i show any, she will run from that, I just let her, she very attractive and finds lovers easy, but as coach Ryan points out that not what missing in their core wound, they miss the emotional love you give them, they desire and fear it at the same time, like a vampire that craves the sun, their wounds are sadly very tragic.

[@alanrodriguez210]

Would be nice to hear your personal experience(s) with avoidants

[@JohnSmith-ie6xq]

I've made a replay on one off your other videos . I gave my all and my time and resources effort and all I got.was nothing . No matter how many excuses are made they are damaged and all off this . Look I come from background that would made u go oh dear my mother and father showed love and brought me to do the same now my father was diffrent an old school man he didn't suffer fools but me I'm diffrent I wear my heart on my arm and all i got off woman was abuse physical and mental and I was expected to take this avoidants are liars and thief's off the heart at the highest order . I broke contact to help it's the last time I will do this I'm gone and staying gone your videos have help alot

[@Flower-v8w]

He's an avoidant, but I dumped him. I won't take him back. And I'm definitely not going to go through looping with him. What's engulfment?

[@chelseajackman7730]

Perceived loss of independence in the relationship that, upon abandonment, will leave them with nothing. The love of my life (no contact going on nine months now... sad girl over here...) was married before. He told me, at different points in the relationship, all of the following: 1. Before getting married again he demanded a prenup to prevent the victim--presumably him--from losing everything, including savings and shelter. Any girl who wouldn't agree to a prenup was out of the running. 2. It got to the point in his marriage where, at his first job which was touring, on his off days he was at home with her or running errands. No friends. No hobbies. No havens outside the house. He was either on the road or with her. When she had the first affair, she said it was because he was never home and so he gave up the touring job he loved. He had a series of shitty jobs and was either at work or at home with her, still no friends, no going out, no nothing. When he and I dated, he said that he had worked very hard to cultivate friendships and things to do out of home and work, and I could either join in or let him have his time away. (That's really not unreasonable if you think about it, so I wasn't offended.) 3. He described multiple ways in which he lost his individual personhood in his first marriage, which by the way culminated in a second string of affairs and a nasty divorce that left him living in his car for about a week until he found someone to take him in temporarily. 4. He was extremely averse to our living two and a half hours apart from each other and cited that as one of the main reasons he dumped me, but later on in that conversation he said he needed to be able to make decisions based on what he wanted and not based on what somebody else wanted. He had been engulfed in his first marriage and so was hypervigilant against letting it happen again. It's potentially very telling that he got spooked by me and the way I loved him (quite well) because he may have found himself willing to make those concessions or similar ones for me without even being asked to, as a healthy masculine man does when he is in love. Because he was never taught the difference between codependency and real love, he may have assumed his willingness to make me a priority in his life meant he was losing his individual self again, which experience taught him was a very harmful and unhealthy thing (and the way it happened the first time, it was). See what I mean?

[@tabarnakopoulos]

About 2 months since she suddenly broke up with me. I have been in no contact ever since. Still no sign of her anywhere. Good thing is I can keep the no contact indefinitely.

[@ajibuwamiracle836]

It was through this channel @droman01 I restore my relationship back in 24 hours

[@Divinelyprotected-c2w]

Thank you if he comes back I will make sure he has done the work I agree with you a world of pain

[@NederlandseGeschiedenis]

I still have the pain still after 39 years

[@christinewright9374]

I think my ex left because we were very close, but also because he built up resentments that I knew nothing about, of course. I think the resentment will prevent him from coming back. That is okay with me. I am still shocked by how mean he was when breaking up - he had never been mean to me before.

[@trickymouse3951]

Exactly my experience. Sorry you had to experience it too, it is so painful and mind f%%%g - for lack of a better word.

[@CosmicQuinoa]

Same happened to me.

[@vixter28]

He’s never gonna heal. He’s an alcoholic. He will just keep doing what he’s doing when he met me

[@Darkempress45]

Idk lmao maybe I’m the avoidant. My DA doesn’t discard, it’s me that’s always like nahhhh we don’t want the same things, we should stop seeing each other. He will be like ok fine, wait about a week and he’s right back on my phone. I try to put up boundaries and he will not respect them. It’s been six whole months and I don’t know anything about him. He holds an invisible 12 foot pole between us to prevent any intimacy. So he’s practically stranger. Now, six months in, he has discarded me. I feel like he has been to therapy before because he basically warned me that he is “different” he’s “toxic” and that “he says things that he doesn’t mean”. He always seems very careful to say the “right” things, things that a therapist would teach you to say for proper communication lol. We’ve broken up and gotten back together 5 or 6 times. Now he has done a discard. Oh he will respond to my text messages but he refuses to see me lol. Time to go into no contact 🥴🤦🏾‍♀️. But I will say from what I’ve seen, he’s a more advanced DA. Atleast he is aware of his avoidant attachment style and warned me. I just thought he was being difficult, I didn’t know he had an issue with intimacy

[@tomasjohnson-pw7cg]

Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to move on, I really loved her so much i can’t stop thinking about her and the memories we shared. I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail. I’m frustrated, and i don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts, but i can’t. I don’t know why I’m saying this here, but i really miss her and i wish i could get her back

[@Johntravolta-ic7mv]

I have been in such a situation. My relationship ended about three years ago, but i could not let her go. So i had to do all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual adviser who helped me bring her back. We are back together, and i must say i am enjoying every moment.

[@tomasjohnson-pw7cg]

@@Johntravolta-ic7mv Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

[@christopherrobinson-eb1in]

@@Johntravolta-ic7mv Really? How do i find one please?

[@Johntravolta-ic7mv]

@@tomasjohnson-pw7cg Her name is Susan Smith, and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.

[@tomasjohnson-pw7cg]

@@Johntravolta-ic7mv Thanks John, i really appreciate.

[@Yapap1234567]

I kind of feel bad for them

[@danielfuery4417]

How do you do no contact with them when you have kids? Or am I wasting my time as I suspect she's dating someone else.

[@tallspicy]

Most dont come back. Even with no contact.

[@Heavenlysky89]

Good

[@rose-of-theoasis]

My ex came back 3 times before

[@donh1572]

Agreed, more KZbinrs need to be honest with their audience. Avoidants just find an escape with someone new

[@MD-gk2un]

He knows I'm angry at being blocked out of the blue so I'm not convinced he's gonna come back and apologize. He's too dismissive.

[@tempsdeloisir938]

thank you 🙏🏻

[@1224polo]

To anybody who was dumped by the avoidant: he or she did you a huge favour removing themselves from your life. Believe me

[@OMGWHATTHEJANK]

When do they come back? I've been no contact for a month and a half

[@Animecat161]

any update?

[@mastanate]

Update?

[@mohsinzawiyar2081]

Avoident is my husband with one child he left me since i was pragnant pls tell me what do i do to get him back i am not chasing him any more not praising him but he is still avoiding

[@andziagreen4922]

Start living your life for yourself, get help, therapy if needed and have strong boundaries. Those people don't respect your heart.

[@bernieoconnell5515]

Run for the sake of yourself and your child. Why would you want a creep that dumped you while pregnant? Are you well in the head?

[@lihanammalsa1120]

Do they come back after 2nd breakup?

[@saraht1108]

After 3 years in the 5D and because of his fears, we haven't met Sometimes ❤+++, i'm yours and sometimes 🤐 one month ago I told him ✋🏼 He lives in fantaisies and daydreams. He dreams his life instead of living it... self sabotage Unbelievable...don't even meet someone!

[@GladiatorBrig]

What if we have little kids?

[@j3ff840]

I want her but she ain’t coming back. I saw her twice in person after and she sat by me twice but said absolutely nothing one time we could say hi and bye and it gave me hope but the second was a complete slap in the face. On top of it she moved near me so it’s tough to grapple with. I did everything for this girl (we didn’t actually date but it was pretty close to it). I sent her a insta dm and now She’s blocked I had to kill her off to save myself. The only way it can work is if she works on herself like I have with therapy. It’s really sad to considering I knew her since we were kids and said we aren’t even friends when we were arguing.

[@melissalavrisa4055]

After 2.5 yrs,out of the blue told me he didnt have to give me an excuse was never his girlfriend and i was only for the sex. Told me to get out of his life. Everything was going well. Totally hurt. 3 weeks NC and im sure hes found other supply,and toxic friends.

[@bernieoconnell5515]

You are well Rid of that foul person. Block him in your head and more on. There is no going back after the way he diminished you.

[@reasonably.responsible]

It really is. It was a waking constant nightmare. Like Dr. Jekyl Mr. Hyde. He refused to have accountability right. By the end I didn't know whether my hands were feet or whether they were hands. He drove me crazy I tried to kill myself because of his actions before I understood their behavior were reflection of their self belief not my value. He would run off for months and try to come back never acknowledge thir toxicity and how painful it was to me. He finally said after 7 years granted i wasn't in a intimate relationship or anything i would remotely identify as such that he wasn't going to put any effort. If you hear what they actually think from the beginning they would never get their needs met by you while neglecting your need- the desire for true intimacy.

[@JMaverick-z4s]

On point

[@ElloMawb]

What should I do if she only texted me telling me to take care of myself? Seems like the she closed the door. I replied to her and told her I was doing fine and she didn’t respond. Does that count as me breaking no contact?

[@andziagreen4922]

Exactly, take care of yourself. You have the answer

[@lwalters6622]

Yes you broke no contact but the good news is you get to start again right now. Think about what messages she could send that might be worth breaking no contact because this one obviously wasn’t. She just wanted to see if you were there waiting and she got the answer she wanted with minimal effort. Take all of your power back by choosing yourself.

[@Moretosh]

I was the one that finally left. They return or not .... they would need to agree to therapy and learn to commit. Otherwise move away for good.

[@photographyenthusiast9941]

Mine never stayed gone for more than a day, So I had to get creative.

[@vampy7966]

I asked my DA very early on why he hates himself so much? He couldn’t answer me, just said he doesn’t know why but just does. @Coach Ryan, can an FA turn DA later in adult life after other traumatic events? My DA shared stories of his youth & earlier days & it seems like he could’ve been FA but now is DA due to broken relationships especially two where the ex partner took his child away? Or is it solely from childhood & his care givers?

[@Mine4ever-p3r]

How long do they take to come back?

[@alanrodriguez210]

Days, weeks, months, years.

[@winnieamar9368]

If you want to speed up his coming back,detach mentally. Move on in your life,not needing him to come back. Be fulfilled in yourself. Do what makes you happy. Work on your shadows.

[@Mine4ever-p3r]

@@alanrodriguez210 thanks That sucks 😢

[@Mine4ever-p3r]

@@winnieamar9368 thank you 🤗 I’m trying but it’s so hard Each day I’m fighting to stop myself from texting him

[@cjthemvp123]

6-12 months

[@1224polo]

They will not come back and they will not miss you because they feel resentment towards you because of flaw finding and absurd, ridicolous reasons created in their sick heads just to justify their decision to break up with you. And no contact will not make them to change their mind and come back

[@austinrandall1273]

I don't want them to come back but I know when she texts me I'll be there to fall for the love bombing once again.

[@chelseajackman7730]

Yeah but will he come back a fifth time after I finally learned my lesson to set up a boundary? The previous three or four times I made the classic rookie anxious-attacher move of taking him back and letting him know I was still in love with him. If I'd done this the first time around I'd say I had a chance of him coming back, but a fifth time after I finally grew a pair? I dunno guys, it's lookin' a lil bit bleak over here in my world.

[@janef4701]

@chelseajackman7730 Update? Did you guys work it out?

[@The_Whimsical_Avoidant]

Oh man...always using the word discard. 🤦‍♀️ Sometimes people are no longer interested and break up. It's not like they're tossing you away. It's an adult saying this doesn't work for me and leaving.

[@chelseyt7091]

I think it's HOW the break up happens.. Discarding someone refers to ghosting, being intentionally hurtful, refusing closure or a proper break up, etc..

[@0Demiyah0]

Why do you always use the word "discarded", it's such a loaded word.

[@karinadelacruz7147]

Because that’s exactly what they do

[@0Demiyah0]

@@karinadelacruz7147 getting broken up with, or dumped, is not the same as discarded. That is a load of bullshit to say every avoidant "discards" a partner. Discard is language that people use when psycho-analyzing narcissistic abuse. Avoidants are not more susceptible than other insecure attachment styles to have pathological narcissism. It is problematic that this coach neither reflects on how TWO people fuel insecure dynamics on both sides. Scapegoating avoidants and using language like discard is pretty narcissistic, you know. This is not the healthiest content to engage with.

[@karinadelacruz7147]

@@0Demiyah0 alrighty then 💀

[@0Demiyah0]

@@karinadelacruz7147 I'm sorry for the pain you must be in to feel "discarded", but honestly I have been studying attachment theory and trauma recovery for 7 years now. You can choose to dismiss it sarcastically, or you can choose to inform yourself better too, and seek out other information than just this bait aimed at your pain.

[@karinadelacruz7147]

@@0Demiyah0 I’ve never experienced this first hand, so don’t “assume” I’ve gone thorough this -but you go ahead and continue studying this interesting subject and going off on the internet with strangers ✌🏼

[@simongatt9044]

Maybe they avoided you because of that hat! If anyone anxious wants too reply too this I won’t reply 👍

[@VidarTemte]

To, not too.

[@Assdfgresa]

What if there wasn't a label on the relationship but strong connections together. If i left them and had no communications... would they ever reach out?. She was being dismissive and I blind sided her and left

[@gudni9060]

I guess it depends upon their interest level in you before you walked away and after.

[@Assdfgresa]

@gudni9060 True, if she is interested, she will come back

[@summerrain3251]

Probably so but the cycle will just repeat