Willingness as an Antidote to Anxiety: A Weird Exercise That Helps You Get Better at Feeling

[@teresablubaugh321]

Through this exercise I realized that I have been harshly judging my emotions which just takes me farther down the negative spiral. Wow, thanks, I now have a tool to help. Curiosity not judging!

[@NaturallyGraysful]

Teresa Blubaugh you’re not alone that is also something I do. Love how you said curiosity over judging🦋

[@gracekennelly8534]

This is SO helpful!

[@videoettaceo8900]

Same here! This has been a huge and disappointing battle for me. But THIS makes sense.

[@nonanonaea9358]

🥰😘😍🥰😘😍🥰😘😍🥰😘😍🥰😘😍

[@yevgeniyaleshchenko849]

Stop lying, this crap is NOT therapy and it does NOT help anyone! Otherwise it was not real anxiety to begin with!

[@marknowak]

My version of this approach is to think: "The best way out is often through." (In other words: Don't seek to avoid. Resolve to go straight through. Time after time this has shown itself to be the best way.

[@GospelOfTimothy]

Don't avoid that Minefield run right through it.

[@marknowak]

What we mentally build up to be deadly mines ... aren't. We learn to manage the scary and difficult to get wherever we want ... faster. It gets easier with practice. You can avoid many arenas or you can learn to exist within them.

[@SC-gp7kt]

Yep. Rambo it!!!

[@barbarastepien-foad4519]

Facing your challenges makes them less significant...

[@ericray7173]

Walk into the fire is the way I put it, we all know what it is though, and how good it is to give yourself that choice.

[@hananas9384]

Update: after two weeks of using your tips my anxiety has drastically improved. I had almost become unable to work because of it and now I can take on more jobs than I did and work on personal projects. For the first time in 10 years I am happy to be me and I'm grateful for my life and what I can make with it.

[@brendaoro2951]

Thank you for your comment I'm about to quit my job because I keep fainting during office hours all because of anxiety and horrible thoughts, just reading your comment is making me feel better

[@gracekennelly8534]

WOW! This is good! Thankyou!

[@hananas9384]

You're welcome, I hope you're all doing better now! Follow up: I struggled to keep up with myself even with my newly learnt tools. Found out I have ADHD and leaving it untreated for all my life led to depression and anxiety. Now that I know it I am aware that these tools work as long as I keep my condition in mind, and I can cope with it a lot better. Always strive to get to the head of the problem, you never know where it'll lead you.

[@cerealis_5432]

@@hananas9384 what tips helped you the most? I’ve acquired so many new helpful techniques from this channel and many others, but I really struggle with consistency and knowing when and how to implement these techniques in my daily life. I’ll do them one day then forget, then beat myself up for it. or I’ll have them jumbled in my head all at once and just end up giving up and going back to my old negative thought patterns.

[@hananas9384]

@@cerealis_5432 I'm really sorry you're experiencing this, unfortunately the fact I have ADHD means I struggle with consistency as well. I know it's frustrating when you don't end up doing what you planned on a day, but when that happens I try to give myself the understanding I need: I ask myself, did anything happen that made me feel like not doing x, or was I too depressed/anxious/hyperfocused on something else etc? Honestly the answer is mostly yes (when it's no it just means I'm too tired and I need a break, and that's okay too), then I proceed to elaborate on that emotion/event to process it, and try to do better the next day. I tend to avoid my feelings a lot, writing them down on a diary helps in making me experience them. I make a conscious effort of staying with those feelings until I understand them, no matter how strong they are (I may take a break when it's too much but I'll know I have to get back on it later). Doing a weekly written checkup on emotions is a good idea, if you're used to avoid them like me. Also I found that drawing myself (example: I learnt a sad thing about a friend's past, made me feel really down. I drew myself crying about it on the bed) while experiencing strong emotions, helps coping with them. This is just a personal method I discovered lately! Depending on what you like doing it could be anything, really (: But I'd totally say that the key thing in this self-improvement journey is acceptance for myself, giving myself the understanding I was never given by parents/teachers etc., trying to treat myself like I would treat a friend. I'm sorry, I'm not a professional but I hope this can be of help ; w ;

[@miragegaming984]

The last ten years of my life I’ve been holding on for dear life just making it one day to the next always living in the future and avoiding the now. The last 4 years being the worst of it. A week ago nearly I finally cracked and was barely able to function. Crying over minor things. Last night after that week I finally fought back and then this morning I saw this in my feed. And I’m not afraid of that ache at the back of my head that I have when I’m under stress. I let myself feel it, I told myself that it can’t hurt me, it is part of me and I don’t have to be afraid of it anymore. PTSD is awful. I was married to a very abusive woman but now that I am free of her I am healing and becoming better than I’ve ever been.

[@KikiMeowKitty]

I can relate, Screenshotted this cause I feel it can help me if I’m in a tough spot. Thanks for sharing, and I’m happy you’re getting better and out of the toxic relationship❤️

[@Jonito_xcx]

Same here, courage we'll go through it !

[@MERKMOBB710]

Good your doing better Hope your ex is doing worse lol

[@ogPersonA]

Something clicked for me tonight, as I went from holding my breath for 1:40, to 3:06. When pain started creeping into my chest, I would “look at it” and it would vanish. It would creep back in but again, vanish like darkness to a light and this dance continued for a time until eventually the pain grew tired and didn’t return, and it was peaceful - intense - but somehow calming. It would seem that pain can only survive without its host’s awareness and ‘willingness’ to face it. What a beautiful lesson. Thanks for sharing, Emma.

[@rosalinkrieger3352]

I really needed this! I'm a life-long avoider and I've missed out so much in life!

[@starburst9053]

Saaaaammmeee 😧😣

[@rosem7469]

Dont be hard on yourself......we all avoid and so many dont recognize their avoidance

[@angry-white-men]

That's a plus in my opinion now that the unvaccinated will be forced to avoid everything.

[@starburst9053]

@@angry-white-men that sounds kind of like your okay with taking away people's medical freedom and throwing them to the side

[@awakenotwoke7949]

@@angry-white-men How ironic, This video is about handling unreasonable fear and you're embodying it and condemning those who don't join you.

[@amber3574]

I have aspergers and as an adult there’s not much support but this channel has been such a huge blessing because you teach self regulation through understanding the body. I feel like I don’t always understand my body like having a car but not knowing how to drive. Emma thanks for teaching me to drive!

[@incubus3069]

I noticed that the longer I held my breath, the urge to breathe was much higher. The feeling was that of panic, desperation, and the need to just get it done and over with. I realized that in this stage in my life I am still anxious in trying to get things done quickly and rush things. I hope my sharing helps someone.❤✌

[@Yashtcm]

same

[@aliveandwell3958]

Same

[@hannahuahh]

It is also a natural biological urge so you don’t die. You can’t hold your breath for too long or you’ll pass out or die

[@georgehugo561]

@Justin Kovach I’ve found the Wim Hof method of breathing and breath holding has made this MUCH easier for me and is helping significantly with anxiety. Was also stressful at first, have now done 3min holds quite easily and very calmly. I cannot recommend this highly enough. He has some very good guided breathing exercises on KZbin. Here are good instructions: kzbin.info/www/bejne/pKumko2Hpqamb6s Here's the easiest one to begin with: kzbin.info/www/bejne/ZnOxlp2PZspsn80 Here is one to try after that: kzbin.info/www/bejne/qqrFgJxqnc-NfLM Again, this has helped me so much with this kind of exercise and made it breath holding something I kind of enjoy. My only challenge is finding the patience to do the exercises. It takes some time and it’s hard when you want to rush through it. Feels amazing after you’ve done it though.

[@littlegirl3263]

@@georgehugo561 thank you for these recommendations. I used to do WHB but stopped. I’m at a point in life where anxiety is through the roof.

[@jayneeojeda5677]

This is exactly what I need. It’s crazy how much I LOVE to learn and yet how much I let my mind trick me into avoiding school tasks like going to class or finishing an assignment or asking for help. I believe practicing willingness will help me face the trenches of my education. Please continue making videos like this!!

[@gavinbrown1159]

For one I’m glad your improving that’s great! However going to class is a must especially for me since I’m a mechENG major lol

[@pablocasas6306]

That's awesome Jaynee! You go! I'm not is school right now, but it resonates, and I am applying the same idea to my work.

[@stagename2]

I do a variation of this. Works great to calm my racing mind. I’ll hold my breath till I feel the urge to breathe ( which isn’t long). At that point I’ll wait an extra beat then finally exhale. I’ll remain exhaled until the urge to inhale is noticed. Again I’ll wait a beat before inhaling. Repeat, repeat. I think the magic is in sensing the transition from discomfort to comfort willingly.

[@Liberty_Tree]

It made me present. Holding my breath was in itself, an escape from my thoughts.

[@davidm4566]

My psychology professor said about anxiety, etc.: you need to be able to say, "Bring it on." Anxiety is the fear of something happening. Without that fear, it loses all power.

[@noellemorel7280]

🙏

[@kireidoll]

This is so simple and so useful. It usually is the simple things that end up helping a lot after all..

[@Rose0004]

Beautifully said. I'm going to keep your words in the back of my mind.

[@kissssik6969]

Actually anxiety is the fear of something not happening

[@noellemorel7280]

@@kissssik6969 nope

[@Lukas5473MVSD]

That's why i do my breathings every morning and hold my breath for 2,30 minutes.Then jump into the cold shower and sit there for 5 minutes.Till i start to like it.After that something happens and suddenly i have this huge flow of endorphines,serotonin,oxytocin i feel the most happy human being.That is Wim Hof's Breathing Methode.The guy is a genius!

[@redroseforyou4209]

I want to understand what you wrote. You hold your breath for 2min 30 sec to do the above exercise every day?

[@TehR2D2]

@@redroseforyou4209 Google Wim Hof method and see what is it all about.

[@perrin6]

@@redroseforyou4209 the Wim Hof method uses hyperventilation to achieve long breath holds.

[@stringsnare]

Are you still doing it

[@RomanianButterfly18]

I was searching for this comment😃✌🏽

[@holeymcsockpuppet]

Avoidance vs. willingness reminds me of reactive vs. responsive. The challenge of non-reactivity in the discomfort of not breathing is a a phenomenal training method for responding to emotions.

[@jimmysullivan605]

I haven't let myself cry in over a decade and I just started uncontrollably balling right as this video ended. Thank you

[@shawnbennet432]

Really? 10 years...and you have crippling anxiety? Bro...I cried at least once every 3 months from the overwhelming frustration of the illness tearing aaway at my life.

[@catmando4448]

The first thought that went through my head was "There's no way I can do this." Second thought was " I'm going to quit." Definitely learned something from this video. Thank you!

[@BasedBidoof]

Wow... This just made me realize I no longer need to bite my inner cheek when I'm anxious. It's like I just unlocked new neural pathways. +1 Intelligence. I'm actually kinda mind blow.

[@electrongvn5399]

did it work out?

[@artisticagi]

1:32 first exercise - hold your breath as long as you possibly can 2:54 avoidance vs willingness (chart) 3:53 second exercise - instructions - hold and notice where the urge is 5:57 - shift discomfort from something unwelcome to something that you want 6:09 story - example of shifting discomfort 8:08 willingness isn’t about ‘like’. It’s not about liking a sensation, that’s a judgment. It’s about being with a sensation whether it’s comfortable or uncomfortable 9:00 - second exercise tip - notice discomfort. Try to describe it without trying to change it. 9:37 Second exercise starts 11:48 second exercise ends 11:47 - exercise purpose - to sit in the discomfort without the need to escape it and make it go away.

[@bananasgrowing]

these help me to navigate this video when rewatching, thanks for the time stamps

[@mcmag888]

It’s like the universe synchronized this video into my algorithm at the perfect moment. Thank you for your wisdom sharing!

[@voila89]

I've been trying to manage my claustrophobia and this exercise is a great way to induce the trigger of feeling trapped and unable to do something about it and instantly learning to be in control of my emotions & feelings. I'm going to practise this more so the next time i feel panic I know exactly what to do - make myself believe that i want to feel what I'm feeling and that I am in charge, I am not out of control. Thank you Emma!

[@botousai]

It brings me to tears when I think about how such simple information, if propagated on a large scale, can ease so much human suffering. Thank you so much.

[@dominicbutler4435]

For those interested in further breathwork, look into Pranayama. It’s a rung or aspect of Yoga that is something else. We typically breath around 15 breaths-per-minute. The lower that number goes, the deeper our state of being settles within. If it’s ever uncomfortable or stressing, you’re going too fast, it should have a sense of ease. I’ve subtled my breath to 2BPM (15 second, subtle inhale, 15 second subtle exhale), and it was an extremely freeing and tranquil experience!

[@TheJilayne]

"This lady told me to hlde my breath, that it's not dangerous, I have COPD, how dare she". My mind went to blame, judgment and feeling misunderstood. Himmm....this is an amazing exercise. I'm a 12 step drop out, so I balk at this willingness but for the first time I think I have a grasp on what it truly means. This is a gold nugget video that I'm saving. Thanks so much.

[@TheJilayne]

@R K A bit confused about what your asking me? Are you asking me if I feel anxious when I can't breathe. Sorry, I struggle with alexithymia so bit of a tough question for me.

[@bak6194]

Me too! 12-step dropout and was thinking the same thing about willingness

[@lisacurtis8162]

YOU obviously don't have to.

[@dattagrace]

I wonder what other professional therapists thing about this channel! I am sure many therapists will lose clients because of how much value she is offering here. So grateful for all your work!

[@lexayyubhfdshvfjwndg]

I have attempted to meditate many times in my life and prior to this CD the only success I've experienced is with live guided meditation. kzbin.infoUgkxzpa8CIfZcihW4Z0F_ja0QF3W9KIatrsq This is the first CD I've used that cuts through my unmedicated ADHD and enables me to truly relax and experience a quiet and energizing interval. The instructors voice is very soothing and pleasant to listen to. I am easily able to sit successfully through the entire CD, and for quite some time after. I cannot adequately express how tremendously helpful this CD has been on my spiritual journey!! Two thumbs up and 10 stars!

[@dattallaudiophile236]

WOW! First time 30 seconds. Second time with the instructions 54 seconds!!! That was amazing! This has to be one of your best videos!

[@donnajk4423]

Me too exactly the same both time. 😃

[@capricecraigmill9926]

I wanted to escape that feeling nit wanting to breath....but I changed it up

[@feelthejoy]

My first time was 60 sec and my second time was 95 sec!

[@aroyals339]

@@feelthejoy almost exactly the same here. Only much more importantly (to me at least) the first time I was stressed and anxious about it and even more stressed about having to do it again. the 2nd time I was just curious / it was fun

[@Reinfather2005]

You have restored my faith in human beings Emma. Thanks for all your videos. You are the best counsellor I have ever connected with even just through your videos. You have kept me sober ever since I met you and your videos a few days ago. My anxiety panic and depression have gone down 10 fold since watching your videos. I feel hope again, so thank you very much Emma.

[@Chiroman527]

Dr. Emma, I'm so appreciative of the info you share with sufferers of chronic anxiety. BREATHE !!! A fantastically simple exercise to supply the parasympathetic nervous system toward achieving some calmness. Love YOUR WILLINGNESS approach. I have a number of chronic pain issues stemming from spinal issues including stenosis, spondyliothesis, facet joint arthritis, and spondylitis, and dextroscoliosis. Those physical issues have affected so much in my body.even the diaphragm haspetiodic spasms, allowing me to swallow to much air. IBS, Sinusitis, TMJ, Neuropathy into my arms, legs , and feet are regular feelings. My neurologist says I have Peripheral nerve damage , and no reflexes. But, I try these exercises and others you purport, and sometimes, they work , other times not so much. Deep breathing and holding my breath cause me to burp , sometimes pretty aggressively. Sorry for rambling. Chronic pain and chronic anxiety is Hell!

[@describer99]

Yep. I’m 100% in the avoidance column.

[@BarbaraJanee]

Wow at first I could not get past 40 seconds 😮 but after I doing the exercise with willingness, I held it for 1 minute. Even the feeling came and went the second time. Wow!

[@ideasmatter4737]

Just reading the title of this video has already helped me! Seriously! Just thinking of this possibility made me realize there is nothing to lose by jumping into my stressful work situation willingly! I don’t really have a choice, and it has empowered me to be more assertive about the actual help I need to ask for!

[@evahometx100]

This makes sense. Going to try it. I struggle with anxiety and nervous tics. When I do my facial tics, I forget to breathe.

[@TLH442]

I started doing this as a kid laying in bed. It just felt natural to me like I needed it. A lot of people don't understand that the human body has two separate ganglia two separate nervous systems. There's the fight or flight and then feed and breed nervous systems. As the youngest of four boys I had my challenges maybe this helped me, no it did. I even told my doctor that I had a dream one time where I could control my heart rate and I slowed it down and the slower it got the better it felt and I know it was real I almost stopped my heart but I woke up at that moment. He said nah no you didn't. Acceptance is good and I think that unwillingness but I think you also if you can control the sympathetic nervous system and calm it down it helps because I think I have what is known as high sympathetic tone. It can lead to all sorts of bad things like atrial fibrillation. So the nervous system has a frequency It's like static if you were to listen to it it would just sound like white noise but there is a tone. I think holding your breath really calms it down They say that the lungs are the only organ in the body that is controlled by both systems so it's autonomic but also voluntary. Have you ever noticed when you're in a tent situation you hold your breath That's the sympathetic nervous system taking control. When you voluntarily hold your breath perhaps yes you're taking control and that's the parasympathetic nervous system that you really want to be a more active. I don't know if I'm making any sense here.

[@jeffreykaufmann2867]

One can have two reactions to Severe Anxiety 1). Heart rate races and blood pressure rises. 2) Heart rate and blood pressure decreases causing one to faint or feel very light headed.

[@TLH442]

@@jeffreykaufmann2867 I guess it depends on which nervous system is in control. That's a very good point you got there Jeffrey. You're getting this don't you I think you're trying to test me see if I understand what you're saying. I do. Further to this I had 160 breaths in 1 hour last night. Seems a little strange doesn't it? So what I was doing instead of doing it the way the post was describing this good doctor here I used a different method. I'm not trying to hold my breath like I'm an Olympic diver or something I just managed about say 30 to 45 seconds and then I had one small breath so it's a cycle a complete cycle. Each cycle lasts about a minute and then I keep repeating that and every 10th cycle I might have an extra two breaths instead cuz I want to keep blood proof fusion high and not feel uncomfortable I don't want to feel uncomfortable. After about an hour that I mean I fell asleep I was just so relaxed and I actually internalized my breathing I was in way more control it's like pranayama.

[@jeffreykaufmann2867]

@@TLH442 I am getting what? I have no interest in testing you. Why are you holding your breath?

[@TLH442]

@@jeffreykaufmann2867 I'll refer you to Dr Andrew Weil. He teaches combined medicine at the University of Arizona. He has a website and it's about breathing and it's effect on the human body. You can take it from him. I think he'll explain it better to you his; website has free audiobooks and you can download and listen to him. It's a little bit of a segue, I mean this woman here she's got a psychological approach, his is combined. They started it in India a long time ago It's called pranayama. That's a type of yoga and it concentrates on breathing to bring well-being.

[@jeffreykaufmann2867]

@@TLH442 Did you know that Dr.Weil suffers or used to suffer from Mild Depression?

[@sarahengland1843]

Thank you so much! I have used this while freaked out driving on the left side of the road on a visit to the UK. Works well! The way you structured the video is excellent. Best I have seen.

[@brandonlee5487]

wow i very rarely comment on youtube videos but this is an exception. I have sensorimotor ocd and one of my obsessions is controlling my breathing, naturally i feel out of breath or like i cant breathe all the time. the first time i tried this exercise i was so anxious for those 20 seconds that i held my breath. the second time i tried it, i was less anxious and just sat with it even though my eyeballs felt like they were going to explode. still only managed 20 seconds but i was much calmer the second time around. if anyone would;ve told me to hold my breath before i would've called them crazy but this was fantastic

[@gardenlover9663]

I was able to hold my breath twice as long as the first time. I felt relaxed and curious the second time. Thanks!

[@XantheOwl]

willingness as described is basically how I get through dentist appointments and other situations that stress me out - let my mind tell me how awful it is but hold with my determination to be there and also let my mind wander to non- threatening or pleasant environment details

[@alexleventis3021]

A great example of how for some, "sitting on the tip of a spike is the realest place in the world". I find it quite interesting that at one time mindfulness breathing was a way to increase awareness of the self and one day someone decided to do the opposite. That is not to say the opposite won't work in the same manner, they are two side of the same coin when it comes to bringing your focus to the present via breath, whether it be lack of it or full of it. But I think I prefer following what I am naturally inclined to do, which is breath.

[@tessjones5987]

I have emotional regulation- and I have had hardship for 12 years. It has changed my character for the worse. This is really what I need to reset my view point and anxiety level. So kind and creative and intelligent Emma.

[@TheSleepSteward]

It's strange but also amazing. Like I did it the first time just to get my baseline. 1m 46s. But then I did all these steps, and the second time around, didn't take more air in (if anything the opposite), and I didn't do anything else physically; it was all just mental work. And I got to 2m 18s. That's a 40 second increase from just using my mind. That's just so cool and awesome but weird too. Thank you for the awesome video. Gives me a lot to think about.

[@anthonypesola3294]

In affect neuroscience, there are two base emotions: seeking and avoiding. Seeking is similar to play or imagination gaming/ mapping.

[@josephmartin1540]

I had been thinking, again, about this subject recently - desiring to experience and overcome emotions, rather than trying to escape them. Useful experiment. I did increase my time almost double; but, as a heart patient, feeling my heart to beat harder and begin to hurt... I went ahead and breathed.

[@killawofe]

There is a lot of ancient wisdom embedded here, in a very practical exercise. Thank you, this is incredibly useful.

[@ringerheringa3052]

First time 40 sec. Second time 55 sec. My stomach started to jump up and down both times. Just reading the text on the screen and knowing about the purpose of this exercise, made me want to hold on for longer. So: I was willing to endure this discomfort for a while longer.

[@unhealingwithsandy]

Wow! You have helped so much in just two videos. Thanks for being you and sharing your wisdom. I struggled with depression after I had 5 people in my family pass away in one year. I went to therapy and all seemed better until 5years later in 2020 during quarantine, I began struggling again. I keep thinking it will eventually go away but I am realizing by now it is a sign I need to brush up on my mental health how-to again.

[@knogertpiano1119]

Hello. So here is my experience for you here: The first time without the knowledge of the willingness I hold my breath for 56,5 sec and after the knowledge I got to 1 min 59 sec. So that is really different. Thanks for the help to be able to experience discomfort more with a sense of acceptance. Kind regards, Knogert Piano

[@leigholding1397]

The comfort of feeling a teardrop as it rolls down my face. Water water everywhere.

[@banjomoltar8675]

I held my breath for the 2 minutes, then you started talking again and that startled me to take in a deep breath again. It was good to see the body's reaction, stress shot up and I started jolting a bit. Could have gone longer, because i convinced myself the longer the breath hold the more there is no gain. This works with all tough things in life. I had the same mindset running a marathon, the tougher it got the harder i pushed.

[@sarahbreisch4750]

I feel like this idea manifests itself organically for some people, I'm thinking of myself when I gave birth. I did it 8 times, and while at no time was it ever easy, I became comfortable with it because I did not feel out of control, I was willing to do it and willing to let it happen and I think that's really key, that those who struggle with anxiety often do so because of the sense of having no control over oneself because of external circumstances. That is a fact of life, we cannot always control external circumstances but we can control our response to it. I wish I was able to practice the relatives serenity I had during childbirth in other aspects of my life that make me feel anxious. Working on it.

[@azlizzie]

This is a great connection. Thank you.

[@hananas9384]

First of all I want to say THANK YOU for being so thorough. I applied your tips for rewiring the anxious brain and I already saw benefits. Unfortunately I'm not the kind of patient that can go through therapy and simply be told "do this because it works". I suffer from anxiety and depression and I was also diagnosed with bpd, so I have done therapy with a very good doctor who in the end figured out that the best way to get through me was explaining the functioning of stuff. Without a knowledge of what's behind I just feel like I'm fighting against something abstract and obscure, and I'm left wondering "why is this method supposed to work?". Once she started pulling in medical and biological explainations I could manage myself a lot better. With the further help of your tips I think I can do a lot more to get well. If I have a logic pattern to follow then I can do everything I want. I think many more people need this, so I hope your channel will become mainstream soon!

[@LaGataSolar]

Hananas woah I’m the same way

[@ZiggyWhiskerz]

Same friend!!! It helps knowing there's a physical/physiological thing going on that you can fix. It gives you back power over yourself instead of feeling helpless. Thank you therapy in a nutshell

[@susanhale5232]

Whenever I start with a new therapist or care provider, I always tell them right away that it works best if I can know why and how something works, that way I can picture it happening in my body.

[@jennymisteqq695]

@@susanhale5232 Do you tell your therapist that you do these breathing exercises? What is their response?

[@susanhale5232]

@@jennymisteqq695 Oh yes. They always seem relieved that I'm using a skill to help myself. I think it helps them to know what I've been doing to make my situation better.

[@fana7181]

First time 40sec second time 1min. I didnt notice any thought bc of panic but then i noticed i was afraid of being able to to Such a huge thing and then i stopped. I learned a huge thing. I m stopping myself of being GREAT

[@BecomingSC]

I have never seen anyone else with a Samurai Leonardo of the TNMT 90's Era. High quality content and character. Please keep up the work! It's appreciated.

[@hiteshts]

This worked like magic. First time I could hold only for about 25 sec and then struggled to avoid breathing. Second time I clocked 1:09 on stopwatch. My earlier record was about 50sec. Thanks for this technique. 🙏

[@noellemorel7280]

From 40s to 55s. My brain tried to trick me by making me believe I would pass out. I also heard a :"You won't manage to do it, you'll crack." The culminating point of me wanting to breathe vs me wanting to experience more of this was very interesting to live. I felt proud to have not succumbed to the breathing call. Thank you for sharing!

[@consistenc51]

I’ve had the experience of “what if it lasts forever” and it was dreadful. Thank you so much for your advice. I’m trying everyday to practice these tips.

[@krishnakanukollu7695]

I remain thankful to you all my life Ma'am. God bless you.

[@Dustyonelife]

This is great, I appreciate your videos. I am on the Autism spectrum and as it turns out the way we often feel anxiety is different and needs different approaches to the usual ones that work with neurotypical people. However, this seems to work well for me and makes absolute sense. I appreciate your making and sharing it. Cheers.

[@nryane]

After my grandchild’s autism diagnosis and FaceTiming with them, I suspect that I, too, am autistic. This exercise helped me to find a different way to “control” my life - by being willing to EXPERIENCE my emotions. With the pandemic and living alone, my life seems chaotic, messy. By looking at it all and not judging the “chaos”, I might just find a way toward BEING, instead of DOING! Blessings!

[@firestarblue]

Great exercise in allowing the logical brain to dominate the scared brain. Thanks! Similarly, when uncomfortable feelings arise you can imagine what you would say to comfort a small child in your care who is having those feelings...like speaking to your inner child or whatever. The strength to comfort someone else is usually in there... now just direct it to yourself in the moment. Comforting thoughts which validate the feeling and where it came from and also acknowledge the strengths or skills you have to cope with them; It’s temporary: this feeling is a visitor which will come and will go; I can do hard things and become stronger from them; I love your brain trick of imagining a hot relaxing bath instead of focusing on how you don’t want to feel hot; telling yourself you wanted this feeling, like when we choose to ride a roller coaster for a thrill, would reframe your mindset to one of purpose and growth from a mindset of feeling victimized. Great work here, thanks!

[@sammykablammy]

My brain immediately panicked as soon as I started doing this and kept telling me I was about to pass out. While I’ve been practicing a lot of mindfulness recently, this exercise really helped to remind me that my GAD is essentially just my brain panicking and I don’t have to believe the panic I can slow down things instead of speed up, evaluate, and then act

[@D.A.DreamArt]

This is actually a very spiritual practice, being in the moment and going deeper and deeper into it. First time was 95 sek just now, before work. Thanx for this video!! 🥰🥰😇

[@bigbluerips2914]

Emma, her name is Emma.She is Awesome! The only rule about Therapy in a nut shell is that everybody shares videos made by Therapy in a nut shell.

[@TherapyinaNutshell]

Nice!

[@Kate98755]

i took an almost hour walk to move through my anxiety. i'm in a self imposed seclusion right now, can't handle toxic family...as an asthmatic, lack of breath is what i avoid because it can cause panic, which only makes the asthma worse. Anxiety always creates my asthma to kick in, so i walk and deep breathe, so i guess i'm already using breath for calming.

[@joanndurbin3303]

Kate, I am also an asthmatic, though not stress related as much as airborne and animal related. At the start of the pandemic, I followed breathing videos designed to strengthen your lungs in anticipation of possible infection. I will give this system a try as well. Every time we can gain more control of our breathing, we are stronger mentally and physically.

[@tony8118clifton]

Your content is awesome and I would consider you in the upper echelon of mental health help videos on youtube. I have expanded my knowledge significantly on these topics since discovering my genetic background had lots of issues with mental health and like heart disease, I like to stay well versed in case I come to that bridge one day myself. I have recommended your stuff to many of my family and friends and will continue to do so. Keep up the good work!!

[@thistree9028]

I love your deep voice, I have same. Very comforting.. I get angry, then meditate and I cry. I think the core of anger and fear is sadness-and this is the center of the circle. Then I have a better next day. (after I cry)..maybe then, I’m more willing, not defensive. Yeah, discomfort/ time for self acceptance. Thanks, so much for kindly sharing your experience..wow, kids today!

[@grapeypear4558]

I think that was honestly life changing. Thank you for putting the second hold into the video, and allowing the two minutes. I did the first one with a timer and everything but I was really trying to get out of that second one. I wish I’d had this knowledge this a long time ago... but I’m glad I’ve started learning these things now. Thank you so much 🌱

[@allendavenport2164]

Yes that tool is good, but was it is hard, and creating uncomfortable things in our already uncomfortable life sounds crazy.

[@shyneray250]

Thank you for giving amazing practically applicable techniques! And I am super glad that you have used an easy-to-follow speaking pace :)

[@ThomasDoubting5]

The antidote to anxiety is definitely like this. Stop trying to control yourself let go just be. You will never be anxiety free that would be impossible. Also you can't be in a state of euphoria for ever so as this woman is experience the full range of emotions.

[@nyclear]

How about this?: Settle into the one who experiences a full range of emotions and dont try to change anything

[@Mcpwnt]

I'm pretty sure the antidote to anxiety is not lying about your emotions. what video did you watch?

[@CheezLoord]

I was lucky enough to formulate this technique intuitively through my experience in meditation, but seeing it put into words brought a new depth of understanding. On my second breath, every second was spent feeling the transcendence of previous limits. Like my physical and mental pain became new strength. My first breath lasted 2 minutes and 15 seconds. My second breath lasted 2 minutes and 46 seconds. Good video!

[@melaniehare5652]

I already hold my breath for pain and anxiety management. However I don't feel feelings that I can identify. I heard the fan and my heartbeat. I think you're awesome, thank you for your videos.

[@TherapyinaNutshell]

Improve your mental health with the free course, courses.therapyinanutshell.com/grounding-skills-for-anxiety-stress-and-ptsd

[@danielberlien3680]

Great excercise! Absolutely fundamental skill for life, since uncomfortable emotions are part of it. Thanks for sharing!

[@Kn0wM1ndFlowAndMusic]

Invaluable lesson. As an avoidant personality type with substance abuse issues and a constant giant question of “why can’t I generate willingness” treating the things with objectivity and not emotional memory attachment stuff. It’s definitely gonna be a lot of work but seeing a clear thinking structure alternative to my avoidant thinking patterns is amazing.

[@jodieaubry4534]

personally i experienced it with sport, going further and further even if i think i can’t go further and just observing my body and my thoughts and pushing my muscles and my breath as much as possible and see that i can and feel pretty good and calm at the same time (it’s all in the head lol sounds basic but sooo true)

[@DivyanshuChowdharyJi]

Thank you for sharing this simple but brilliant exercise. I was able to hold my breath for 26 more seconds the second time. That too because I looked at the timer and willingly decided to stop the exercise. I could only experience agitation the first time. But during the second try, I could feel agitation, suffocation, relaxation (in feet and legs), curiosity, something being pulled out of hands and a few other bodily sensations which were either absent or I failed to take a note of during the first try. Thank you.

[@allenadayswork2216]

This video is very much like a meditation I just started! I put the stop watch down for the second time so I could really sit with my feelings and forget about the stopwatch. I was astonished I held my breath for 30 seconds longer and it was actually kind of fun instead of uncomfortable.

[@alicenoyes7448]

I am on the edge of getting help for Anxiety and fear, your videos help.

[@Mzd455]

This is way better that deep breathing that I never accepted. I got this huge sensation of where all the oxygen goes, my chest started lifting and all I could feel for awhile was just my body functioning. I didn't feel like listening to anything else. Felt actually pretty cool. I had the whole little sensation for about a min, and after I started breathing again, felt like such relief. And you don't actually faint at all. I did this super tired and irritated after work and traffic. I felt like fainting before that with all the accumulated stress during the day. Kind of makes you energized and relaxed at the same time. Thank you for posting

[@rachelturner998]

Fabulous! Thank you Emma. I find you have an easy to follow voice and your instruction and warmth add to the listening/watching experience. This has been extremely helpful. All good wishes from the UK.

[@andrewbell8458]

This exercise is brilliant. This lady has helped me so much. God bless her and her loved ones

[@doglady9334]

This Parallels what Pema Chodron teaches. Excellent. Its a form of mindfulness.

[@TrinityTalks]

Day 1. (Feelings of extreme anxiety, depression and being emotionally unstable) 1st time: 1 min 11 seconds 2nd time: 1 min 26 seconds. During this time I realized that I was able to control the feeling of urgency without reacting on it. Will update my experience tomorrow.

[@oanamat9888]

I am so grateful for all the materials you offer to us. You helped me a lot in my improvement and healing path. It is so obvious that you are not only a very well prepared specialist, but also an amazing person ❤

[@paulatesterman9913]

Thank you Emma for your videos. I have just started watching them, and found the ones on anxiety and trauma to be very helpful. I did have trouble with this one, though, because I chronically hold my breath, and I’m just now learning to overcome this. It was diagnosed as asthma, but I think it may be trauma-based breath holding. What has helped me stop chronically holding my breath when anxious is the book, The Oxygen Advantage, by Patrick McKeown. He also has a KZbin video on anxiety and breathing which is very technical, but which explains the loop we can get into between unhealthy breathing patterns that cause more feelings of anxiety that cause more unhealthy breathing. He doesn’t get into breath holding per se, but I think there is a strong connection there. So this exercise was not one that I could do for long, because I did not want to revert back to my own unhealthy breathing habit (breath-holding). Just thought you might want to consider this, for those of us who have this problem. Thanks for your good work, and I look forward to seeing more of your videos on anxiety and trauma.

[@SRJones-ss5sh]

THANK YOU. My pastor talks about people needing THERAPY. I now agree with him.

[@adr3000]

Thanks!

[@shisharupu]

Hi Emma! Just wanted to share my unusual experience with this exercise. As an aspiring freediver, I'm already really comfortable with the urge to breathe (my current breathhold record is 4 minutes!). But I still wanted to do this exercise to help practice facing my fears and not avoid perceived threats as part of going through your anxiety course. One thing I do struggle with a lot is cold water. So instead of holding my breath for this exercise, I've been taking cold showers for as long as I can. And I'd say it has the same results! Overcoming my fear of intense cold using the techniques you outlined in this video really helped me be comfortable. Even with goosebumps all over, I was perfectly fine, even after a few minutes, and I basically had the faucet on C! I used to shiver uncontrollably at temperatures way warmer than that. So this really helped! And I'm sure this mentality will help with facing my other fears as well! Thank you so much for all you do!

[@alexandercook8996]

Wow I went from 30 seconds to a minute without the extra resistance from my mind! Thank you so much for this exercise!

[@lizjoy6828]

This is really good advice. This week I learned that I often let my anxiety push me to make rash decisions and respond too quickly rather than taking the time to consider the best approach. This often creates more anxiety and mental anguish since I usually regret the way I handled something. I'm grateful to have figured that out. I'm going to practice giving myself time to recognize how I'm feeling, so I can be in a more controlled mindset to respond rightly. Also, for the past year or so, I've been working really hard to practice the habit of analyzing my emotions when I'm feeling anxious or frustrated. I do this to figure out where my emotions are stemming from so I can have a conversation with myself to resolve the conflict. It has helped me overcome a lot of difficult situations in my job, within my relationships, and regarding my self confidence. *started out holding my breath for 46 seconds. When I went to do it the 2nd time, I closed my eyes and tried to follow the advice. I felt discouraged when I finally took a breath because I felt like I'd only held my breath for ~ 30 seconds. But when I looked at the timer it was 1min. 6seconds! That surprised me...

[@khairulamri4196]

1 minute 30 seconds,, I think steps no 3 and 5 helped me a lot to be willing to hold my breath longer while my emotion urged me to continue breathing.. 😃👍

[@maocharlisme]

Round one: 1 minute, 1 second Round with purpose: 1 minute, 25 seconds I think this was a really cool and useful excercise! Thank you!

[@maocharlisme]

Towards the very end the second time my mind with words tried to trick me into believing that I already had to let my breath escape but then because of the exercize my awareness kicked in and clarified to me that I would be able to hold it a bit longer at least.

[@grindkingsd9609]

I tend to push myself so hard until I master something and I use how well others do at it to judge just when I have done enough. Skateboarding is a good example. I knew I wasn't finished learning until every time I showed up at the skatepark, everyone was coming to me with exclamations, and asking advice and I just knew I had overcome what I set out to do. Watching your video for the first time now gave me such a desire to want to know you and be with you its very curious. I needed to hear what you are saying, thank you, I will someday watch more of your videos and secretly hope to meet you one day soon!

[@fgigjd]

Wow, I could hold my breath an entire minute more after this exercise. And I’m feeling less anxious too

[@Crymble]

To be honest I held my breath for fewer seconds. I actually started thinking about the discomfort and was asking myself why I'm really doing this. I'm doing this because I feel like I don't have control over myself and that I'm in discomfort when I'm not doing what I know to be right. I quickly remembered, that this doesn't really help me. I know what I have to do. But I do see the reasoning behind the exercise and I will try to engage discomfort in challenges I'm avoiding.

[@praetentious2925]

I feel the same way

[@danielcunningham5940]

This was very good exercise for me. The concept of going through something unpleasant and making it something I will to do, making it a positive thing is amazing. During the second breath-holding I was thinking how I used to envy rich people for their freedom to do as they choose and to believe that they accomplish things because of their talent and will to succeed. I envied them their priviledge and self-confidence. Exercises like this allow me to claim this kind of freedom for myself - that I can take a positive attitude about life experiences and turn the around as if I did will myself to be in them, and be in the moment with them and not try to escape. This freedom is more important to me than wealth. I see in the Comments that other people had other positive experiences with the session too. My thumbs up to all of us.

[@Chawncey777]

To me it’s called a, MELT DOWN. Yesterday I thought I lost my cell phone. These were the thoughts racing through my head; OMG all the messages and phone numbers gone. I have to by another phone, but what about my apps. What is another cell phone cost? My life is OVER What an Idiot!!! How could I have lost it. What about my music and pictures. ? I then start the swearing and then the guilt. Don’t take the Lord’s name in vain tapes start running and on and on and on like a run away train this lasted about 15 minutes anxiety stress it never ends I wish there really was a CHILL PILL tHANKS FOR YOUR SOOTHING WORDS

[@raynatha4450]

43.1 secs. and I was afraid that I might faint. 😀 but I'll practice this regularly from now on. Thanks for sharing the technique.

[@tearoma4887]

Wow, my thought to get me to avoid those uncomfortable feelings is " This uncomfortable feeling is bad for your health" ....I can't debate on that ...

[@LaGataSolar]

I just want to say how much I appreciate you putting the list up on the screen for this exercise. Helps a lot and motives me to do it more.

[@rabmall]

I have been binge watching Netflix latley, and you hit the nail. I just havent found what i am most passionate about and am discovering myself again.

[@CommanderWaddles]

My head started pounding & hurting 47 seconds in so I stopped. I'm glad it's great for all of you in the comments but this truly seems silly and dangerous to me. But I wil 100% apply these techniques in doing tough workouts & not giving up!