I would love to hear your feedback about gossiping. Whether it's in your workplace or in your personal life. Please share with us. Have you ever had to deal with a gossiper before?
@elisaiotero-figueroa96015 жыл бұрын
Do you have an email that I can send you my story.
@dominicthelordkabinga5 жыл бұрын
Gossipers only respect consequenses. Show them there will be repercussions and they will shut their mouths immediately.
@americablessgod12735 жыл бұрын
You described a specific kind of Narcisst. He was a full-blown Sociopath. Look it up. There’s no way to influence their behavior. It’s based on their own delusions about perceived dangers and threats to their ego. Their malice knows no limit and their revenge runs very deep and they never stop obsessing over targets. No Narcissist EVER has ANY conscience compassion empathy guilt or remorse. They have a fake kindness and fake happiness. But they are only able to experience negative emotions like jealousy envy rage revenge. (Reprobates are in the Bible, like Pharaoh).
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
@@americablessgod1273 Hmmm! That's very interesting. That sounds like a blanket statement. I agree with your perspective. However, that cannot be the case for ALL gossipers.
@americablessgod12735 жыл бұрын
Rene Godefroy, That's not what I said, and is off-point. I understand maybe you're new to that idea, but I lived under it so I do know what I'm talking about and I hope you read what I said more carefully. I feel you missed my point completely.
@WashingtonDC200324 жыл бұрын
I learned that when you try to combat the gossip about you by attempting to set the record straight and clarify things; things only get worse. Best to just ignore it altogether and steer clear of those people. The more you stir in shit, the more it stinks.
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
I'm smiling, Eugene. I like the way you put it. Also, consider it depends on how you attempt to set the record straight. Sometimes we are coming from a place of judgement instead of understanding. When that is the case, people will fight and offer more resistance. Hopefully, that makes sense.
@dity94423 жыл бұрын
I found that out too.
@WashingtonDC200323 жыл бұрын
@@renegodefroy yes it does make sense.
@evadiva30853 жыл бұрын
Eugene Murphy I’m lol because that saying comes directly from my mother-with some people confrontation does not work walking away does not work-these are the ones that need a swift kick in the ass but as adults and in a workplace we can’t meet them in the locker room! I refuse to explain because as long as I know what’s happening what others hear think or feel I can say IDGAF and keep on pushing-the light always shines on lies sooner or later!
@norellewildburger14573 жыл бұрын
In my experience, if you confront it, it backfires on you. If you ignore it, the gossip gets to your boss and then you are out.
@lisawadhams12412 жыл бұрын
I once left a job because of a gossiper. The gossiper contacted co workers in my new company and continued to gossip about me. Some people have no life
@Faelivren9 ай бұрын
Seriously none-
@Faelivren9 ай бұрын
Seriously none-
@Faelivren9 ай бұрын
Seriously none-
@Faelivren9 ай бұрын
Seriously none-
@MikeSteele-px6le8 ай бұрын
Sue them for slander
@marcycat2 жыл бұрын
Gossips are jealous people. Their opinions don't define who you are. Focus on yourself not them. It's a birthright to live your best life regardless of the jealous people.
@yvettejones42498 ай бұрын
That is true. My coworker was jealous of me because I received a few compliments about my work even hugs.
@blk_lies5 ай бұрын
that's the trick - it defines what _they_ are
@anonymous-od1gv4 ай бұрын
Don't worry about those who talk about you because it's not about you it about them and knowing that they themselves have issuè
@laurenspivack19035 жыл бұрын
I am really sorry to all who I have gossiped about and hurt in other ways
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Lauren, you are first class! This is a statement that you are self-aware. That's called emotional intelligence. There's no doubt you know how to catch yourself in the act. Awesome! Most people would never openly apologize as you did.
@casimirobuenabista5 жыл бұрын
Are you going to change?
@melinabourne59545 жыл бұрын
For real.
@Kaliachristygnoix4 жыл бұрын
I agree so much with you sometimes I tell them what i said about them and it can be rough too.
@bernitacenteno13262 жыл бұрын
@ Lauren Spivack Please read my reply. Thankyou.
@veronica09025 жыл бұрын
That's the problem with gossipers! They are time wasters who can't be trusted. I abhor it! They gossip about everyone but themselves!
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Veronica Moore absolutely true! Well said!!! Thanks for your feedback. Don’t forget to subscribe.
@pamelabibby86424 жыл бұрын
thats right like druggies they gossip and talk shit and nonsense and lie about peoples mum wanting a abortion thats all lies
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
@@pamelabibby8642 By that, I'm sure you know they are sick people who need help and compassion. It's useless to lose your cool and get to their level.
@robertrutenberg39193 жыл бұрын
I noticed if you don't agree with them. They throw you under the bus. They are really lowlife self centered angry people.
@urstrulii59322 жыл бұрын
That part. It’s comical
@paulatomassi8017 Жыл бұрын
I would absolutely not let a bully gossiper to run me off my job ever.. I’ve been dealing with horrific girls where I work I got vertigo from these women.. They will not break me, nor will I give up my job.. hr does not help either. I keep moving forward they are behind me.. ❤️
@renegodefroy Жыл бұрын
You are a boss! Thank you so much for sharing with us. I love your comment!!
@HidingPlainSight7 ай бұрын
Good for you! Thanks for inspiring others!🧡
@angelsarah794 ай бұрын
It seems like HR won’t do anything unless there’s proof like an email. The gossiping is not via email!!
@daniel007craigwheatcroft4 жыл бұрын
Gossiping people in my eyes have personal issues deep down they are insecure & need to feel dominant all the time by talking about your life when they should be looking at their own faults in life & focusing living their life I've got no time for them. If they talk about me I ignore them it's pathetic immature malicious gossip to pass the time away.
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
I like the fact you ignore them. The gossiper is insecure as well as the person who taking the gossiper too seriously. It takes two to tangle. Kudos to those who can ignore the gossiper!
@Natalia-tq9qx4 жыл бұрын
My former friends are gossips. I used to do it with them. I would hear how gossiping is bad, and felt awful. I recently learned, they gossip with you until they gossip about you. It's awful, and it's how they are. Since then I have noticed how much better I feel as a person and how much, cleaner, I feel. Less disgusting. Less mean and secretive? Gossiping is harmful to the gossips and victims of gossip. No matter the relationship, when you gossip with someone, you need to remember this: they will always gossip with you just fine, act like friends and maybe a few bumps, but one day they just will not talk with you, or it'll slope, talking less and less. It'll be about you when that happens. Better not to get involved.
@shellym17363 жыл бұрын
I changed my friend circle, specifically, cut them down, because I stood up for something that no one stood up for, actually all of them sided with the offender. And they gossiped about me regarding why I might have taken a stand, that was so obvious and rightful on my part. I just hate that some people can never get out of their typical high school mentality, and educate themselves and take stands. I feel gossipers can't stay away from groups and even I have been a part of all of it for long. However, now I stay away and I am happy fr what I did.
@tommyparkerparker Жыл бұрын
Something I learned. You could sit at the table with a group of people rather friends or even family and they will gossip about others. But when you leave the table or not there at all, you become their subject.
@andrewthomson31395 жыл бұрын
I was gossiped about a lot in school and church. I told pastors and I told teachers and principles. It seems my gossipers were never stopped. Gossip is evil. And I seem to be the victim to it. People idle talk me. Gossip has the power of life and death. It's tragic
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Yes, the tongue has the power of life and death. It's so sad when brothers and sisters are gossiping about each other. Don't let others poison with their venom. When they give it to you, refuse it... that is mentally. You silently say to yourself, "I'm not accepting your malicious intent."
@ajc22083 жыл бұрын
@@renegodefroy Great affirmation to divert negative intent away from yourself. Thank you. Have written it down.
@bajodah18473 жыл бұрын
Their actions are pure evil. Gossip truly can harm and break a soul. Even when the rumors are true these people are wronging us. But the way to get over feeling shamed is by cutting ties, find all the reassurance you need and then by our own researches we can find the reassurance that will come from within, and have a firm belief that you’re on the right track. And trust yourself. We will know why people did the things they did and let them go and try if possible to let them go for good. If it’s not necessary I’m never ever going back to any interactions with them
@bmoshareholderappleshareho8552 жыл бұрын
It's human nature to gossip. Telling people to stop gossiping is like telling a newlywed not to have sex.
@nancysmith94872 жыл бұрын
Buddha quotes
@1kingstan7954 жыл бұрын
I love it how he says is like a drug they need to get their fix
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@LR-yu3mx2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for explain ing this valuable info so clearly!
@Cozybelle305 жыл бұрын
The sad thing is when you have a boss who does this about everyone in order to manipulate and maintain power over everyone and HR wont do anything about it.
@KetoZenLifestyle5 жыл бұрын
Corporate is full of these types. I find it so pathetic.
@L1L2L3L4S3 жыл бұрын
Yeah...so so so sad... Bosses too are insecure and fearful.😨
@tobiasisbroken19343 жыл бұрын
I felt this a little too much
@charleeharris29763 жыл бұрын
My current boss is like this. A power over/ control man. I am thinking of leaving.
@Hifirrrr3 жыл бұрын
@@charleeharris2976 u should.
@SOUTHTEXAS2316 Жыл бұрын
Publicly live in such a way that if someone speaks ill of you, no one will believe it.
@kerry-ann31095 жыл бұрын
I really like this video. Rumours get started by jealous people. When someone gossip about u, use it to motivate yourself and show the person they cant stop u. This will break them down.
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
Well said. Thanks for your feedback.
@classicalretroback4 жыл бұрын
You nailed it.
@urstrulii59322 жыл бұрын
Exactly!!!!
@agentjordan6052 жыл бұрын
Ok got it
@nah31864 жыл бұрын
I never thought I would be the target of workplace gossip. I consider myself mentally balanced and take pride in my ability to not let things bother me. This gossip however made me feel a lot of anger and it effected my attitude towards others. I let it get me in a mental funk. Hearing your explanation and personal experiences really helped me snap out of it. When people gossip it stops you from accomplishing your mission or goals...that truly resonates with me. Thank you so much for sharing with us.
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
You are welcome! Thanks for letting me know. Yes, it's like taking an unexpected punch. You fumble for a moment then you recompose. This time, keep telling yourself, "I'm bigger than this nonsense. It will NEVER phase me again. I will only say positive things about these gossipers. I refuse to get to their level. I will be kind wherever there is meanness." Remember this: Gossipers cannot resist love and compassion. They are too weak. They are struggling with low self-esteem. Take the high roads, my friend. Also, keep in mind that people are good by nature. It's how they were programmed by their environment that makes them behave the way they do. Some of them suffer from love deficiency. They will attempt to hurt for love. I remember watching Mike Tyson in an interview. He said, "I was hurting people badly for love." He went on to say every time he would knock down the opponents, the public would give him love, respect, and admiration. "I had to destroy more opponent for more love." He said. You see, every behavior has a good intention. It is seeking some kind of rewards. The thing is, the gossiper is not doing to you specifically. No! A gossiper gossips EVERYWHERE... even at church. Simply put, gossiping is not the root of the problem. It's just a symptom of a much deeper issue.
@binkyfaith3 жыл бұрын
I had this happen to me, people were slandering who I was as a person and spreading lies, which ruins your self esteem… I had to leave jobs due to this. No it doesn’t look good, but imagine staying in a cesspool of b. S it destroys your character
@brockgleftmannin64933 жыл бұрын
Yep, sometimes the damage to your reputation is so bad once they're done, you can't even repair it. Best to leave.
@ladyk73172 жыл бұрын
Never run never hide stand !💋💪🏾
@kidindie6 Жыл бұрын
^ exactly. Those type of coworkers will be waiting for you at the next job too. Stay prayered up.
@tommyparkerparker3 жыл бұрын
What is worst is when family talks behind your back to people that is not family and lies about you in the process.
@renegodefroy Жыл бұрын
That's hard! Family business should stay in the family. Thanks for sharing my friend. 🙏🏼
@PaulHanson-zo5qj Жыл бұрын
Been there
@HidingPlainSight7 ай бұрын
They do it to cover up what they did to you. Don't let it ruin your health
@LaaraOfAllah5 ай бұрын
My story though 😢
@KageumiUmikage5 ай бұрын
Happened to me. I exposed myself to my parents about bipolar disorder 2 and suicide... my father told people at his church about me. I couldn't believe my own parents gave people weapons to use against me.
@victorallencook71074 жыл бұрын
Then we have gossip . Types of people have made careers out of gossip . Gossip is sin .
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
Gossip is sin? That's a good way to think about it.
@infowarzz Жыл бұрын
@@renegodefroy yes it is, it drives a wedge between people and destroys the place
@aleasharowe25512 жыл бұрын
This was so helpful. I literally just saw 2 coworkers gossiping about me on one of the coworkers computers. It made me feel so sick to my stomach because one is always so kind and fake to my face. Literally comes into my office to get her material to gossip about for the day. She must be like the person you’re referencing. All her conversations revolve around gossiping about someone else. I’m a Jesus follower and loud about my faith so I stand out everywhere I go. I’m offensive to worldly people but still always get shocked when witches are two faced. Pray for them is all I can do.
@jessitabonita2 жыл бұрын
Exactly! "Be wise as serpents; harmless as doves!" As a Christian who currently notices a spiritual darkness in my own workplace: I pray for us to continue to pray for our enemies so that they may be saved, repent from their evil ways, and come to Christ! In Jesus' name! I hope to be the salt, the light, and an example of excellence and the Fruit of the Holy Spirit that is set apart from the world- since this world is not our home!
@libgurl01 Жыл бұрын
You just spoke to me my brother. I’m even taking a week off work to focus on my mental health.
@renegodefroy Жыл бұрын
Take the time off to center yourself is a fantastic idea. Your mental is very important. Good for you! 🙏🏽
@karenBarr-e1c4 ай бұрын
so true, toxic people have the most friends but for the wrong reason, they miss out on deeper meaningful relationships. Everything this guys says is so true.
@renegodefroy3 ай бұрын
Yep! Well said. Thanks for your comment.
@Shrimpo73 жыл бұрын
The gossip that you describe is horribly malicious. That goes beyond the common “careless” gossip. This is character assasination. The fact that your bosses tolerated this nonsense is also disturbing. That does sound like a narcissist and a psychopath.
@kaseycort94285 жыл бұрын
I am with you about the gossiping. IT is just another form of being condescending to you because of jealousy, hate, sturring up trouble anything to start trouble. RIse above it.Gossipers have a pathetic attitude because they hate when you have it better.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Well said, Kasey! Thanks for your feedback. Much appreciated.
@Faelivren9 ай бұрын
It’s nice that your coworker came to you! It’s so dumb and annoying that people behave this way 🤦♀️
@jeffreycasera3332 жыл бұрын
That’s true people can make gossips to make you feel uncomfortable.but the end of the day the truth is always prevail.
@laurieberry1623 жыл бұрын
I don’t understand why people don’t understand why people who get gossiped about are angry at the gossiper.
@hopechevalier8709Ай бұрын
Bingo...
@theindy794 жыл бұрын
Been in situations many times and learned one thing whether people are on your team or not just smile and know God is your answer long as you keep Him in your heart know all will be good keep the sun in all never give up as long as it rises
@theindy794 жыл бұрын
Might we never give in shoot if God gave in we wouldnt be thinfa that make ya go hmmmm
@davidclark36033 жыл бұрын
Thanks for that. I was a gossip victim years ago. I got destroyed and lost everything. It went on for years and I haven't got over it today. That was 20 years ago.
@Cpl_rhwo5 жыл бұрын
I have been a target of gossip before. I have a hard time thinking why these people would go so far to bring me down. I even doubt whether I am such a bad person (I am never too good in dealing with people, I more focus doing my work). Thanks for sharing the video. It comforts me. Not all of their opinions are true. Most gossips are craps anyway. And I yes, I can reject their opinions and move on.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Most definitely! Focus on your work. Reject their opinions. Don't let them dump their insecurities on you.
@angelaharrison1034 жыл бұрын
Wow this is amazing advice! I’m going through this at work now and I couldn’t figure out what I did for this person to spread rumors and turn people against me. After watching your video, I’m committed to staying on the right path and not letting it distract me from my greater purpose.
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
That is fantastic, Angela! I'm so glad you found the video helpful. Don't forget subscribe.
@angelaharrison1034 жыл бұрын
Rene Godefroy Just did! ☺️
@justicevibes12522 жыл бұрын
Love this!!
@LoneWolf-pc5mb5 жыл бұрын
I used to have a guy where I work who would love to start gossip sessions about me in the break room. I took care of it. I was at a local bar and he came in. He had a worried look on his face as soon as he saw me. He knew he had it coming to him. I was in the restroom washing my hands. He came in there and was trying to act all friendly and fake with me. He tried to pat me on the shoulder like we were buddies or something. I blocked his hand with my elbow. And I was like let's just get one thing straight here I don't fucking like you or any of your friends and if he tried to put his hands on me he would get his ass handed to him. I'm about 5'11" and of stocky build and powerful. He is taller than me and lanky. He didn't take me seriously and tried to touch me again and I shoved him in the floor real hard he banged the back of his head on the floor. And I got on top of him and just beat his ass like a garage sale couch. And I told him that I caught up to him that time and I could do it again and that the beatings would continue until he learned to keep his mouth shut. And if he went to the law about the issue that I would beat his ass twice as hard. Now when he sees me at work he automatically looks down at the floor in shame. I've seen him walking along smiling and he could see me and just automatically gasp and look down at the floor in fear. All of his friends give him shit about coming back to work all beat up. He even went as far as asking my supervisor to tell me to keep my distance from him because he didn't want any trouble but it is because he was scared shitless. He saw me as an easy target because I am a quiet person who doesn't say much. What he didn't realize about quiet people is we aren't words and empty threats we're action. That's why you don't fuck with quiet people. It was a lesson that he had to learn the hard way.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Wow! You don't play. I guess there are many ways to skin a cat. As for me, I prefer to use psychology to disarm and confuse my opponent.
@LoneWolf-pc5mb5 жыл бұрын
@@renegodefroy Psychology is alright but they remember pain a lot longer. Pound their head into the floor, put the boot heels to them and they get the message and others do to and it is a lasting one. Just make sure you don't do it in front of cameras. If someone walked into the restroom I would've just told them "well this prick tried to swing on me and I was protecting myself". If he tried to deny it later I would've just been like "oh yeah prove it". If there's no cameras and no witnesses then there is no proof.
@sametoyoutoo85093 жыл бұрын
You utter thug. He beat you psychologically and emotionally. You're weak. Seek therapy as you're a bully too.
@shraddhasurkar46623 жыл бұрын
Few colleagues always gossip and spread rumors..it is always better to stay away from such people.
@elisaiotero-figueroa96015 жыл бұрын
Cruelty in the job site. When your boss got that men gossip he should have fired him, that is why hurts so much to hear about people messing with you in the job, because the bosses don't do what they should.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
@Elisai Otero-Figueroa, thank you for your comment! You don't have any control over what men or your bosses do. Jerks will be jerks. You can only control how you respond. Your attitude and mental state is totally up to you. Don't give away that power. So, practice self awareness. Basically, you catch yourself in the emotion. You question yourself, "Why am I feeling the way I'm feeling about this?" The moment you ask that question, you become aware that you are allowing something on the outside of you to dictate how you feel inside. That's a terrible way to live life. Because jerks are jerks. They are EVERYWHERE. You can't avoid them. Use empathy, compassion, and self awareness to deal with them. Many times people behave the way they behave because they are hurting inside. It's their way of masking it. So, if you shift the way you respond, they will move on to their next target.
@AnthonyManzio Жыл бұрын
I'm from Canada. What is your advice? Same here being bullied, mobbed, gaslighting, harassed at the hospital for over 12 years. I've happened to be the top worker for 38 years and have never been suspended. These bullies are jealous and miserable people. Union, manager, HR and the police are all totally useless. Bullies are lazy bums and stupid managers are scared of the bullies. They say about me I'm crazy, I drink, I'm a stalker all bs defamation of character. The biggest mistake since they removed disciplinary measures. They should arrest the bullies and fire the manager. Action speaks louder than nasty words. It destroyed my reputation. I will never quit to make these lazy bums ever win. If I decide to transfer to another hospital and may start mobbing me once again, I don't know all the new managers etc. like in every department like now. So best to not change hospitals. I will never let bullies try to control me from quitting. Never let these low life lazy bums win ever win.h
@FrothLyfeSailingNandji4 жыл бұрын
I feel like people who gossip can say whatever they want about others, from this everyone knows what kind of person they are.
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
True. Thanks for sharing your feedback with us.
@tommyparkerparker Жыл бұрын
If the tables were turned, some more likely to bully back harder to you.
@hannahb38549 ай бұрын
💯 true, I hate gossips they really need to be exposed in my eyes…….. thank you for this story ❤
@renegodefroy9 ай бұрын
You are very welcome! 🙏🏼 Thank you for your feedback. Happy new year!
@marie.theartist9 ай бұрын
I am here in 2024, and I can say this has happened to me in two jobs already. I would never share much but they would find ways ti makeup rumors of manythings just to demoralize me. It was horrible. It was affecting my physical and mental health.
@Bettynice8167 күн бұрын
I'm experiencing this right now.what did you do
@xchorro5 жыл бұрын
I get reallly really realllllly nervous at work as a cashier at a cafe and I can tell it makes some people annoyed and I understand because I stress out the team. Because of this a lot of my coworkers stopped liking me and now I hear a lot of them trash talk me and it made my anxiety really worse and I get so uncomfortable there. My heart beats faster and I get a big pit in my stomach the closer it gets for me to head to work. But honestly working at this place I learned a lot, so many people here talk crap about each other and there’s just so much weird drama. It’s honestly toxic, I’ve learned to bite my tongue and not retaliate in any way because I don’t want to stoop to anyone’s level.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
I'm curious to know what you are saying to yourself at the time you feel so nervous. What's the source of it? If you were my coaching client, I would have to ask you enough questions until we get the root of this behavior. You see, the symptoms is never the problem. That said, I think you need to choose one person at work you might feel a bit comfortable with. Start befriending that person or just invite him or her to lunch. Say something like, "I would love to get your advice on something. Do you have a few minutes for lunch?" Everybody LOVES to give advice. Confess your problem with the person and how it causes others to gossip about you. Then ask for advice on how to go about that. Your boss would be ideal if it's possible. Simply put, pick an influential person if you can. You must talk about it and pray about it. There are so many ways to go about it. But, not knowing much about you and your circumstance, it's hard to do a proper diagnostic. That said, get a life coach or go see a therapist. Get some help. Your issue is easy to resolve.
@twocents74953 ай бұрын
I hope you can find a less toxic environment. I cry for you because I’ve been there.
@tenikaj704 жыл бұрын
Thanks for this video. I am going through the same thing that happened to you at your company. I know it’s jealousy behind it. But unfortunately the gossip and back talk is believed by some people. And I m seeing change in behavior towards me. Thanks for the reassurance.
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
Awesome! You are indeed a very wise person. Let me know if you any specific questions for me.
@L1L2L3L4S3 жыл бұрын
Rene should we at least make effort to make things right?
@AdrianaGirdler5 жыл бұрын
I love how you shared about your own experiences with workplace gossip and how it really got to you emotionally. Unfortunately, we all deal with this on some level and it's important to know how to respond when these things happen. Thanks for sharing. Cheers!
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much Adriana for your valuable feedback. Much appreciated!
@dhanyatashettkankonkar90192 жыл бұрын
It gets worse when after gossiping other people who are not at all related will start playing tricks on you and you don't even know how to respond Or whether to respond or no.
@raymedel96732 жыл бұрын
I stay away from gossips, I don't want to see them, I don't want to hear them, and I don't respond to whatever they say. I want nothing to do with them.
@paulagriffin3385 жыл бұрын
Thank YOU SO VERY MUCH! My husband and I are being gossiped and lied right now. He is a Municipal Judge, and he is a very good man who goes out of his way to help others become better people. He is highly successful, and he has served our community for 22 years. We have only been married for 5 years, and we both have been viciously lied about on several occasions. My precious husband handles this exactly the way you described. I have as well, but I have been attacked SO many times in these years, that I am just so deeply hurt, angry, and I havent been able to think straight. I believe God led me to hear your uplifting words, which also gives even more confirmation of my husband's words. We have dealt with this many times since the day we were married, and we always hold our heads high, keep showing love, kindness, forgiveness, and help those who desperately need it. I just needed to hear something good, something to empower me again. Thank you from the bottom of my heart kind sir, you truly helped calm my soul.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Thanks for your authenticity. Obviously, you and your husband are making a difference in the world. The fact that others are gossiping about you guys is a sign you are living life on purpose. That's a good thing. In fact, we should be nervous when no one is gossiping about us. Why do you think there are so much envy and gossiping about celebrities and business tycoons? Hello! I mentioned in the video that the guy who was gossiping about me was jealous. He saw I was reinventing myself to become a motivational speaker and that was perceived as a threat to his ego. So the way to deal with attacks that hurt you and cause you to be angry is to become a thought zapper. You see, it's not what others are saying that is the problem. It's our interpretations that make the difference. The way to do so is to sit down quietly and observe your thoughts. The moment the first one appears, zap it. Just say, "that's another one." And you keep saying that for every other thought. As soon as you are aware of the thought, it magically disappears to make room for another. I'm sure you have heard someone says, "You are breaking my train of thoughts." Right? That's what I mean. Your mind is railroad for trains of thoughts. The first wagon has the engine that pulls all the wagons. The first thought is the engine that triggers or pulls the other ones. Your job is to derail the train and stop it. This is something you can anywhere. You can zap thoughts even while you are driving. That's essentially the way to zap the gossipers in your mind. Don't go be with them. Zap'm!!! Finally, when you think about them, you can say, "I must be doing great. That's why they are gossipping about me." Tell your husband, "Honey, we are doing awesome in life. That's whey they are after us." When I was a kid in my village in Haiti, we only threw rocks at the ripe mangoes; not the green ones. Got it?
@pooperdupes5 жыл бұрын
The same thing happened for me! I came home from work today after someone said something really rude and judgemental to me, and started crying and praying for God to give me strength and for Him to show the gossipers at work the error of their ways. I just can't understand how everyone always seems to hate me when all I do is try to be nice to everyone. I never say a cross word to anyone, not even when I probably should. But still I have to sit at my desk and listen to these GROWN WOMEN whisper and giggle behind me. So I prayed and said "God help me." I decided to look up advice on gossips in the workplace and this was the first video to come up. It really helped me find my inner peace again. Thank you Rene! For your advice and sage words! Please keep working to spread positivity and harmony in the workplace..and everywhere else!
@paulagriffin3385 жыл бұрын
@@renegodefroy You are truly a beautiful, bright light in this world. Your reply MEANT SO much to us! Thank you for your uplifting words, having comforting, thoughtful, positive reinforcement from you, a man who has a passion, uses your God given talent to help others be in a peaceful, powerful, positive mindset in order to move past the barriers that block our God given talent, and be the very best versions of ourselves, and pursue our dreams!! Thank God for YOU!! You are such an AMAZING MAN!!
@paulagriffin3385 жыл бұрын
I HAVE to ADD... It feels pretty cool, feeling like a celebrity, ya know?!? :))WOOO-WOOO! Would ABSOLUTELY love to find a way for you to come to our town!! My husband and I would be HONORED! Please, share with me what it takes to bring such a gifted motivational speaker/ celebrity*, as yourself to our community. Please contact me if you are interested at my email: pjgriffin11@gmail.com, or call me, 806.316.8886! I have great respect for you, and am so inspired! Hope to hear from you Rene Godefroy!!
@thepeepingsprout29445 жыл бұрын
This was an excellent video. I've been trying to stop all the gossipers at work because 9 times out of 10, the rumors are untrue or the truth greatly stretched. Gossiping can kill moral in the workplace and can be hurtful to people. I can't stand it.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
You are absolutely right! Gossiping is negative energy for the workplace. We should stop it by defusing or redirecting the gossiper. Every parasite needs a host. We should not be the host.
@thepeepingsprout29445 жыл бұрын
@@renegodefroy it was amazing to me that when a gossiper is approached in a direct manner, without any fakeness, they quickly tuck their tail and run LOL I found it difficult to not let emotions get in the way (I recently got promoted so I'm now part of some of the gossip as I joined the higher up management). Do you have an additional video or any suggestions for being able to handle it in a neutral way, without personal emotions when it does or has affected us?
@ParlayParri243 жыл бұрын
"You will find those people EVEN at churchs"
@HidingPlainSight7 ай бұрын
Even?😂 -especially at church
@LouiseP77563 ай бұрын
Wolves In Sheep's Clothing...
@michaeldennis44882 жыл бұрын
I've dealt with this in family. I've learned via a small nephew about people gossiping about me and the wife. Mean behavior, jealousy, and coldness were the "Hallmark" of this. I will not share the relationships or the names, but it hurt me deeply and drove a wedge into family relations.
@frfrongnocap55375 жыл бұрын
Yeah, gossiping is something else, ruined my life much. Especially my romance life, which I was surprised men believed it. And finally was over with my relationship side of my life. But really to shift my focus from that stuff I just started developing myself).
@renegodefroy3 жыл бұрын
Absolutely! The key is to shift your focus.
@kaseycort94285 жыл бұрын
Thank you Mr. Rene for sharing your story, I felt the knots in my chest and anger, could not breathe...I said the same thing Why would someone be so evil? My issue entails, gossip, bullying and I was approached by someone else not the bully to also get information and she went back to the evil person and told her the evil one everything I said. soooo it turns out they were both evil..so the best is to deflect the gossip. We have to move away and not trust that person and overcome the garbage talk. also if it gets really really bad report it as bullying & harrassment
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Wow! That is so terrible, Kasey. Sorry to hear about that. Please make sure you apply some of the strategies in the video.
@AnthonyManzio Жыл бұрын
I'm from Canada. What is your advice? Same here being bullied, mobbed, gaslighting, harassed at the hospital for over 12 years. I've happened to be the top worker for 38 years and have never been suspended. These bullies are jealous and miserable people. Union, manager, HR and the police are all totally useless. Bullies are lazy bums and stupid managers are scared of the bullies. They say about me I'm crazy, I drink, I'm a stalker all bs defamation of character. The biggest mistake since they removed disciplinary measures. They should arrest the bullies and fire the manager. Action speaks louder than nasty words. It destroyed my reputation. I will never quit to make these lazy bums ever win. If I decide to transfer to another hospital and may start mobbing me once again, I don't know all the new managers etc. like in every department like now. So best to not change hospitals. I will never let bullies try to control me from quitting. Never let these low life lazy bums win ever win.h
@nieshpalmore797629 күн бұрын
This is good, I experienced this at work! I been on this job for 7 years, I started out as an open book. Not realizing my coworkers would try to use that against me. I showed up everyday as a team player and found myself in situations that I didn’t start. I also started looking for self improvement by searching for podcasts that highlight how to deal with gossip in the work place and going from there I grew so much to learn that it’s usually when someone is trying to cause division is because they aren’t secure in themselves and that is where the jealousy comes in. Going forward, I learned to keep my conversations short and about work! Still learning this, this video was so helpful!
@renegodefroy24 күн бұрын
For sure. Keep your conversations short with certain people. There are those who disguise themselves as confidants to get information out of you so they can use it against you later. Just because someone is a good friend doesn't mean that person wants good for you.
@Catch222359 ай бұрын
Idaho is the only place I've worked at that has a no tolerance policy for gossip and rumors. Also at least your supervisor called you in and talked with you about it. Most jobs I've worked assume it's true and start automatically making changing.
@renegodefroy9 ай бұрын
Wow! Kudos to Idaho! You are right. He had enough sense to call me to find out the truth for himself.
@inthenebula924 жыл бұрын
Great talk! I like that you speak from experience. Most people throw out advice but it doesn't feel like they're speaking from experience. Right now I can't confirm I'm being gossiped about, but I recently stopped being friends with someone at work because they were a prolific gossip and I felt like they didn't care about me, they just wanted an audience. I have NO doubt in my mind that months from now, they will be telling people how awful I am. He's just like the guy you talked about--seems really friendly and talkative at first, then turns around and judges and nitpicks everything people do. Thank you for giving me the fuel to keep on and not let it get to me.
All this time I have been letting them pay rent in my head, getting mad, losing sleep, being angry with them at work. They are JELOUSE of me. So I am better then them. Nice turn around Rene, Thank You Sir.
@onamiilove7772 жыл бұрын
This is truly on point, I am very successful at what I do and over the years I've had a coworkers gossip behind my back and I ignore them. Lately a fairly new co worker has befriended the old haters and came up to me one day and said, why are you so mad and anti-social, why don't you just leave?(mine you I've been there 10 years and she 1year😂) Im like what are you talking about? She said your vibe isn't friendly. I asked her, hv I ever been negative or hostile to you? She said nope!, and I asked her why are you being so intense with me and she couldn't say. Unfortunately she been listening to another jealous and insecure person and she transfer that demonic spirit to me. It's an ugly monster jealousy I've counter this kind ness, professionalism, discernment, prayer , smile and a great work ethic. My character proceeds me and many of thus kinds of ppl wither away slowey. 🙏🏾
@PaulHanson-zo5qj Жыл бұрын
You called it for exactly what it is ! A Demonic Spirit !!!
@PaulHanson-zo5qj Жыл бұрын
Gossiping is Demonic. Jesus Christ talks about it in the Bible
@PaulHanson-zo5qj Жыл бұрын
Lucifer is the father of all Lie's
@cing9545 Жыл бұрын
Now you are wise and I love how you replied and still were happy and did your thing.
@immahoodlum6157 Жыл бұрын
Hey Rene are you still reading these comments 4 yrs later? Because you just helped me and a coworker both on the subject. He and I have been riled up for hours because of a jealous gossiper at work. And now I have some...not 100%...but some peace. Your positive, wholesome energy is what really cheered me up.Ty.
@renegodefroy Жыл бұрын
OMG! @immahoodlum6157 that is phenomenal! Thank you so much for sharing this with me. You made my day even though I am reading this late. You are awesome my friend! 👍🏼
@fatimaalkaabi30443 жыл бұрын
Honestly u have no idea how much I needed to hear this Rene, it’s like u were my guardian angel in this hard situation I’m in 🥺🥺🥺🥺
@roseystroup3 жыл бұрын
I second
@jannamartens80663 жыл бұрын
It takes a really nice person to tell you that someone is gossiping about you in the workplace . There are few people that will tell you the truth their rare and good people .
@renegodefroy3 жыл бұрын
It does take a nice person to do so.
@Hei8765 ай бұрын
how do you know the one tell you the truth is really the truth? I think it's the worst place of gossip
@plantyourself63123 жыл бұрын
The best way to deal with it is not caring about it
@ilovemybeard33945 жыл бұрын
My previous job i felt so isolated that most co-workers act nice to each other, but are mean to me and said a lot of rude gossip rumors and lies behind my back The day i quit...this co-worker confronted me and said "sayonara" in front of my face I told him to wear some Yoga pants like the real ladies...i just walked outo
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Thank you very much for sharing your story about gossip with us. Keep pressing on!
@WazigeLogica4 жыл бұрын
I had a similar experience, but as a kid. I was bullied for about 6 months and it got worse and worse.. I kept taking it and wondering "why are they doing that, what have I done", blaming myself and looking for reasons to justify their behaviour because I just could not wrap my mind around people being evil for no reason at that point.. Meanwhile, I was just quiet but subconciously the anger started to build. Somewhere within me the rage was building and I wasn't even concious of it because I could not feel anger or rage. Just fear and sadness. One day one of my classmates who wasn't even the worst of the bullies did something to me that was the last drop to unleash my anger and I blacked out. I don't remember anything of what I did but when I came too, he was on the ground looking at me in fear and rushed to the teacher, crying. I must have shoved him or hit him I have no idea it was a real Blackout. It's true I never got bullied in school after that incident. Later in life I became worried that this may happen again and I tought myself to be more aware of when someone is crossing the line with me and speaking out sooner, before I blow up. Because it is scary when you blackout and have no control nor any idea of what you're doing in a fit of rage. It is very weird also to do something and really have no memory of it. It just blew my fuses completely, everything was comming out! So now, as soon as I feel someone is messing with me I make sure I am aware and I guard my boundaries, become angry sooner, so I don't black out one day and do damage that could have been prevented. By the way, that boy who is now a man has appologized to me much later when we were both adults. We ran into eachother in the street and had a little talk and he did appologize from his heart that he did what he did and also said I was right to blow up. I respect him for that!
@VeeFoster3 жыл бұрын
LOL!!!
@hirotanakawa68683 жыл бұрын
Now I kinda understand why the people that I don't even know are gossiping and spreading rumors about me Like you said, they are just like drug addicts who needs their fix, and their fix is of course gossips and rumors Those kind of people are pathetic
@janeporter8182 жыл бұрын
Facts 💯
@cleo14442 жыл бұрын
I really appreciate this message. I like hearing how men handle rumors given we still live in a world where rumors ruin peoples lives.
@renegodefroy Жыл бұрын
Oh yes! Some men are worst than women! They tend to gossip a lot. They are drama kings.
@brittanygarbey23712 жыл бұрын
PHENOMENAL MESSAGE! Thank You! I needed this message 5 years ago. Despite what was done to me I AM STILL THRIVING WITH GREATNESS!💃
@renegodefroy2 жыл бұрын
Thank you @brittany. It's never too late.
@yarazard4 ай бұрын
That is exactly the kind of response that you should be receiving from your boss. Sadly, most of us are not that lucky.
@renegodefroy3 ай бұрын
I understand. Most leaders in the workplace are not fit for the job. They lack self-awareness. That's why sometimes they are the gossiper who is doing the damage. That means they are not fit to take care of the gossiping. Too bad. By the way, I have an awesome training program on self-awareness and positive attitude that is fun, interactive, and transformational. Mention that to your HR manager. I'm on LInkedIn. DM me. www.linkedin.com/in/renegodefroy/
@RoopaDudleyPaintings2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for such an amazing video. I recently dealt with almost identical problems and felt exactly the way you did feeling blindsided and pondering "WHY"? I found solace in Psalm 37 and your video magically popped up. The Lord works in mysterious ways. My faith is even stronger now. God Bless you. Wishing you all the success in your endeavor.
@Natalia-tq9qx4 жыл бұрын
I've heard a kid at school talking about me negatively who I don't even think knows what my voice is like very well. So stupid. And others who I've never bothered. Maybe annoying, but never mean or talking to them enough for the annoyance to be a problem. It's annoying, cause I can't do anything about it. I can only change my personality and a few traits of my appearance.
@DonsHooplifesports4 жыл бұрын
Great video thank you I recently dealt with this issue and I had to learn how to not allow the rumors to effect me rumors that wernt true I had to pray and ask God to help not harbor any anger towards my coworkers
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
Your prayer is answered! It's so comforting to have a place to run to when the world turn its back on you! Keep pressing on!
@charlynehinkle5362 ай бұрын
😢 With tears in my eyes this morning. I'm grateful for you sharing your video. I'm having a hard time at work right now, I am struggling to be the best version of me, but I keep bumping in with my co-workers. They are so offended by every little thing I say. There are some sarcasm or cynical comments. And I know that's where I have to grow and be a little bit more mature. But the gossip is so thick in that place. It's so uncomfortable to be there, but I'm listening to you. Gives me motivation to keep my head up and to do better to be better at work..
@renegodefroy2 ай бұрын
Wow! Thank you so much for your comment. You are awesome! You are a winner! I am happy you are self-aware about what you need to work on to be the best version of yourself. Feel free to reach out for a discovery call with me a.yesrene.com/discovery
@keithheller23365 жыл бұрын
Deal with it every day at work & family. Guy at work trying of pull rank on me always trying to get me into trouble. Got family members lie& try to make me jealous. But I try staying calm try to expose their nonsense.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Awesome! You got it Keith! Your self awareness is your ultimate weapon. Keep staying calm. That means you are in control. You watch it happen outside of you without allowing his venom to poison your mind.
@carlitasway2477 Жыл бұрын
Thank you I have a neighbor who gossips about me and it’s really affected my life. Your video helps. Thanks
@reneea8355 жыл бұрын
Thank goodness that I found your channel, thank you so much that helps me a lot. ❤️
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Awesome! Thanks for your feedback. Much appreciated!
@nancyvelazco7886 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this, at the moment someone is making up rumors that the baby I’m pregnant with is not my boyfriends and it’s his son’s… I am completely devastated specially because I’ve been loyal and faithful to my now boyfriend, I feel in a complete darkness and pain, a pain so big I wish I could take my life away to stop hurting… I didn’t do anything to this person and I just don’t know what to do… I’m completely devastated.
@mqoqoza4 жыл бұрын
Thank you, thank you...it's very true, the minute you focus on the gossip about you, you are distracted from your goals. One must focus on themselves 💪🏾
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
So true!
@sajcooks28282 ай бұрын
Very informative video well done for sharing with us
@renegodefroy2 ай бұрын
Thanks for your comment. I appreciate it.
@smitabehera25384 жыл бұрын
I really got a huge positive vibe from your vdo,i'm thankful that I found your vdo,which gave me a light of hope to deal with those people who always gossip about me even I've done nothing to them.
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
Thanks for letting me know, Smita! I'm really happy you found the video helpful. Let me know if you have any questions.
@isabellaswanepoelbella27693 ай бұрын
Thank you Rene for the video and it helps to know my actions at work it 100% right. I don't speak to my co-workers because of gossipers and fun makers. I just keep my mouth shut and do my job everyday.
@sanly56974 жыл бұрын
I really needed that video my coworker spread the rumor that I'm a thief and I didn't knew how to react. This video really helped me thanks you
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
That warms my heart! I'm so excited you found this video helpful. Let me know if you have any questions for me.
@thomast6202 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much, I really needed to hear this, I was with a narcassist and he has been gossiping about me and turning people against me for the last two years, I pray to God to help me every day to get through this and move forward.
@renegodefroy2 жыл бұрын
You will be just fine. Just decide not let him get to you. That's a person who is hurting inside. As the saying goes, hurt people hurt people.
@Shay4YourMind815 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this!! Gossip was one of the biggest reasons why I left my last job. I realize that there is no workplace out there that is perfect, but this place was truly a cesspool. The main gossips were an evil “mean girl” clique (which included our supervisor) who were slackers, and would target different people (the hardest working employees) within the office and just torment them until they quit. Just a few weeks before I quit, I noticed that I was slowly becoming their next scapegoat, but thankfully, I was able to find a new job relatively quickly, and got myself out of there. Even at my new job, there is gossip, but not at the magnitude of my last job. Gossip will lower morale, and increase turnover. Not surprisingly, gossips are very disloyal-they often gossip about their “gossip partners” too.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Awesome! Yes, gossips will never go away. Some people are addicted to it. They gotta have their fix. So your self awareness is what matters. You know they are coming and you are ready to handle them. Love and compassion. Evils cannot resist love. They MUST bow before it. Keep saying good things about the gossipers. Treat them with genuine kindness. That’s the meaning of turning the other cheek. Love is your silent power!!!! The funny thing is, you will appear to be weak to the outside world. Your ego will tell you that is being a coward. Don’t fall for it. If the gossiper is being controlled by his or her ego, you have to do the opposite. We must transcend the ego to rise about the pettinesses and stupidities we face daily. That said, kudos to you! You’re are first class. Keep taking the high roads.
@mimiwilliams89184 жыл бұрын
Shay4YourMind81 this is EXACTLY what I’m going through right now! The work contract ends in September, but I know I cannot wait that long. Every workplace has gossipers, but this place takes the cake! I guess because the boss is in the middle of it....I don’t bother anyone, but for some reason I am the topic of discussion. I have to keep my head up and keep it moving, because I know a big door will be opened for me soon 😊 thank you for sharing
@NoribyNature2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for this video Rene. The biggest issue I’m having is that my boss gossips about me to everyone in the office. I’m the only woman, only person of color, and his only employee since he fired the last woman who worked directly under him last year. I have now taken on a hefty load with no training or direction, and he refuses to compensate me accordingly. Whenever I make a mistake, he goes and talks about it with everyone. When I approached him for a raise during a performance review, he shared all of this information including my salary with others in the office. It’s so toxic and I have no one to go to because I am the office mgr, HR, marketing coordinator, project manager, part-time accountant, trainer and everything else in between. He is extremely sneaky and no one sees it. His perspective of me has further tainted others’ views of me as well. I would really like to speak with him about it but Ofcourse he’ll just go and tell everyone that I did 😞
@jessitabonita2 жыл бұрын
🥺 I pray you get out of that situation into a better one ASAP. As Dave Ramsey said in a video about office gossip: "Meekness is not weakness; it is power under control." I encourage you to watch some videos of "Life After Layoff" on how to quit your current job with a good exit strategy out of this toxic job of yours. Update your resume with all the ways you are a blessing to your current employer, and watch the recruiters flock to your indeed/linked in profile! Then and only then once you have a confirmed start date on a new job: resign! Don't even bother giving a two week notice. You are more than your race, you are more than your gender, you were fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God! You are the daughter of the King! Chin up, keep up your excellence, and go where you are valued! As Tony Gaskins said, "You teach people how to treat you!" 💛
@toni_wood3 жыл бұрын
It is so hard to turn the other cheek some time when all you want to do is cut it off when people ruin your life with jealousy,slander,libel,defamation and online bullying. I am going through this on a level that's beyond the scope of anything I've ever dealt with.When it get's to the point you are being denied flights,losing housing,work etc something is seriously wrong.I have been dealing with flight discrimination and rejection since 2018 due to these rumors. Even if one was disabled emotionally,It's still illegal and discriminatory to reject one's flight due to that. In my matter false accusations of insanity were thrown around with no due process,due diligence or any evidence by a party abusing their former power in governmental position. The party issued a nationwide alert of sorts releasing photos of myself etc and other false information and hippa breaches leading to physical assault and losses of housing,work,kin,etc.I had to have a legal name change and enter the safe at home program yet it provided no help as my photos and identity etc have been compromised along with my safety.Relocation has not helped either.My ability to want to live is on the line aside from all trauma lived up to this point. My Health is failing and I am quite tired of this.I am treated like a social leper or pariah. I am dehumanized on a daily basis.The abject humiliation takes its toll leaving you melancholic all the time. My human and civil rights has been violated on such an outrageous level it can't be comprehended.I don't have the complexion for the legal protection.Nor do I have anybody in my corner or social support.I have been on my own since babyhood and beyond. The Injustice is unbelievable.I am tired of trying to cope with it yet can't seem to find anyone to help let alone the correctly specialized attorney to deal with this matter probono or via making payments. I don't feel I can continue living like this any further. I feel my Dreams are nearly impossible as who will treat you like a "normal" human being if they think you're nuts or are scared of you due to these unfounded ridiculous rumors?At the very least I thought If I could follow my Dreams,I had a chance. Now it appears my Career is suffering over this and it leaves me beyond hopeless.Losing kin has left me distressed & anguished.I am at an impasse and just tired of it. I am tired of being the bulls-eye butt of jokes reduced to a punch line or anecdote.There is no quality of life left.I have noone to turn to and know of no where else to retreat for safety.
@lamzy37733 жыл бұрын
@TONI WOOD It is well. I hope you're doing great??? Do you need help??? Are you in the US or Canada??
@toni_wood3 жыл бұрын
@@lamzy3773 I am in the U.S.
@lamzy37733 жыл бұрын
@@toni_wood Okay, that's great. Is that you on the videos on your channel? Or a different person?? Also, are you feeling well today? I read your comment on this video and was truly touched by it. Is there anyway I can be of assistance to you?
@toni_wood3 жыл бұрын
@@lamzy3773 Legal Aid/et
@toni_wood3 жыл бұрын
@@lamzy3773 Just want to feel safe. Yes,My creative videos are mine.
@j.r.nvision-imagination773 ай бұрын
Thank you Rene. This has helped me recognize many things, even about self. ❤
@smc19423 жыл бұрын
Gossip is created by Haters, spread by Idiots, and believed by Fools. Just ignore these people. Coworkers are just that. Nothing more. They are NOT your Friends! They are merely the people you work with. Don't define your life by your job; that's only a task you do to pay the bills. It's not who you are! The real you is the person you are at home; whatever you call that. Just because you mow the lawn doesn't make you a lawnmower!😉
@agentjordan6052 жыл бұрын
Exactly
@user-sz3qm8hp9z Жыл бұрын
This is actually so true!
@saltyassassins58162 жыл бұрын
Also a friend of mine has a saying. It is put the blinders on, don't worry about the next person just worry about yourself. I find even if people wanna gossip I'm not out to make friends.
@Narsty_Boy4 жыл бұрын
A very caddy woman at my last job was trying to ruin my relationship with a co-worker. When it didn't work, she started to get very angry and acted out towards me, breaking my things when I wasn't around. She was not as sneaky as she thought and I knew it was her. It disturbed me enough that I finally lost my cool. I am very cunning and I won't go into the details, but eventually I caused her to lose her job. If you follow the advice in this video and head it off early on, you won't have to take drastic action like I did. A gossiper will usually try to endear you by gossiping with you about other people. Even if you don't like the target, pretend that you do. It will dramatically change the direction of the business relationship. If that doesn't work then you might have to do what I did, but only as a last resort if you really like your job and don't want to have to find another one.
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
Excellent feedback. I like the way you explain it. That said, that woman is deprived of love and attention. All her behaviors are nothing but symptoms of a much deeper problem. The funny thing is, every behavior has a positive intention even though the impact may be negative.
@andrewrobertson38943 жыл бұрын
Honestly, I would love to know how you got your revenge.
@francescamiddleton58844 жыл бұрын
Whoever got that award must have been some mighty better man! Because this was fantastic. Very real, very clear and practical. Thanks so much!
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
You are right! Thanks for your kind feedback. Much appreciated.
@sharonrussell66072 жыл бұрын
WOW! I thought things were just happening to me on my job. This is going on everywhere!
@renegodefroy2 жыл бұрын
Yes! It's happening everywhere my friend. Somehow, it's coded in our DNA. Most people know how to keep it under control because of the damage it can cause. Others simply can't help it. Have you noticed how the gossip shows on TV or radio like TMZ or Jerry Springer last for so many years? For some reason, the saying "hurt people hurt people" is true. People who are hurting emotionally tend to consciously or unconsciously hurt other people. Gossiping is one way to do so.
@donkylefernandez46802 жыл бұрын
same
@newhealthinsights40452 жыл бұрын
This has happened to me so many times and I am at my limit. I am ready to turn the tide in my favor!
@rianiimane38814 жыл бұрын
Thanks for the speech. I'm currently a college student. And I had a best friend who turned against me and went to my classmates and gossiped about me. This hit me hard because everyone thinks I'm the bad person. I didn't answer to anyone either. I'm trying to get over it now, but this is emotionally incriminating.... How can I help that feeling to go away?
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
The way to get that feeling to go away is to monitor what you continue to say to yourself after your classmate started the gossiping. What you need to keep in mind is that your classmate is only a trigger. But, what makes you upset is already within you. So, during my coaching session with my clients, I do something that is called chunking down or chunking up. I simply ask the right questions until there's a breakthrough or a shift. Here's what's happening... 1. You have a thought 2. The thought triggers an emotion 3. The emotion triggers a physical discomfort 4. Then a behavior follows Monitor your thoughts. If you catch yourself thinking the unpleasant thought, dismiss it. The reality is, you are adding meanings to what happened. You are interpreting it from your own world; not their world. The story that is going on inside your head is by now fictional. We are meaning making machines. Stop making meaning from what happened. In your world, you have your own deep seated beliefs and values. You also have your insecurities and self doubts. In fact, it's the same for all of us. I go through those same emotions. However, I am more self aware than most.
@glsrawvideos621 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for this sharing..yeah jealousy makes people all of a sudden hate someone
@ronsheikh98615 жыл бұрын
Good video man. One word sum up the story jealous people must be avoided!
@flatinon0073 жыл бұрын
Today i just found out one of my employee ( man 50+)was spreading the rumors that i m dating one of my old employee who's i haven't see him for about 2yr. I was laughing so hard same time i can't believe he did this. I'm happily married for 20 years and have a great career. Finally i realized as u said JEALOUS is final answer. Think of him twice divorce , live alone and not getting along with his own kids. Wow... Amazing to see real evil exist.. Thanks for advice Sir.. I appreciate you..
@CanadianMang5 жыл бұрын
This is beautiful thank you so much for this video.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Awesome! Glad you enjoyed this video on gossiping. It's a problem a lot of people are confronting in life.
@sammartinez25892 жыл бұрын
This is a great topic to discuss with young professionals.
@mdmmalou4 жыл бұрын
Love the way you put this! And know, speaking from experiense, jealouse people are dangerous!!! They dont allow you any pleasure or happiness in your life, and they will deliberately try to destroy you. It is good to hear you, and to see that you love life! 😃You can't choose your enemies, but you can choose your friends. Take good care, always...
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
Yes! It's a form of escapism. Most people will do anything including tearing others down just to avoid facing their inner demons. They don't want to confront their insecurities, fears, low self-esteem, etc. Yet, they are starving for love, compassion, and caring. That's too bad. In spite of their behaviors, they are still awesome and amazing people. But, because they are hurting emotionally, they want to hurt others as well. As the saying goes, hurt people hurt people.
@mdmmalou3 жыл бұрын
@@renegodefroy Thank you for your response. I didn't know this until now. (two month later) My credo: Leave gossipers and their 'friends' alone. These are NOT your friends. And don't degrade yourself even if it hurts. Ignore, bc its their pain that they saddle you with. What hurts isn't even yours! Give it back to them, by leaving them for good in a strategic way.
@DSchae21653 жыл бұрын
I have learned that the best way to deal with gossipers is know who they are to begin with and don't give them fuel. They will always find someone to target at any given time, fill in blanks they don't have information on, etc. When it comes to gossip about me I walk away and stop talking to them. Anything you say at that point will be used against you. If you have to live with or work with them and you can't just end the relationship, give it a week or two until they'll focus on someone else. Then continue on as always, or continue leaving them alone. But never participate in their gossip chatter, because 1) that's fuel they will use against you, and 2) if you don't like it done to you then don't do it to others.
@masterofda452 жыл бұрын
You know I worked at a toxic place for years all they did was gossip and they still do. I just think it's sad that they still talk about people and make up things but the way I play it is if I don't hear it from the horses mouth it doesn't matter what they say or think there weak just trying to get attention
@jiwanjameel96392 жыл бұрын
i've just got a very bad gossiping while I was helping some people they saw me that I know some information they don't know. I feel like they just wanted me feel down.. and I immediately came on KZbin to search about how to deal with such kind of people who are always gossiping you.. and I was lucky to find your video it was helpful you made me understand all the situation very well
@gredofa22623 жыл бұрын
What an incredebly well taught lesson from you. Sharing your story with gossip was really powerful!
@terri-annebless47262 жыл бұрын
I am feeling this on my job too.. But to God be the glory! I am still standing!
@pramodverma93664 жыл бұрын
Thanks for this video. Gossipers are everywhere and they thrive on it. We try to do better ourselves so that gossipers will say better things but they find a way to pull down. Nobody can be perfect. Understanding the situation and dealing with it with a calm mind can help. Thanks!
@renegodefroy4 жыл бұрын
Absolutely! Thanks for your comment.
@zazangoma258211 ай бұрын
Thank you so much @Rene Godefroy, this means a lot to me.
@almasoto76545 жыл бұрын
I was working on a company where they send the workers in pairs. My coworker was like 30 years minus than me. And some women were comment to other that I was having an affair with him. That was aweful, I think he heard that comment too and he only stop to speak with me. Even he was playing some weird music were included a chiring or squiky bed. It was evil people who doesn't care to other's reputation.
@renegodefroy5 жыл бұрын
Wow! People will make up stuff about you, especially when you share your business with them.
@almasoto76545 жыл бұрын
@@renegodefroy but all that was a mith, they made up only to pray.
@andrewrobertson38943 жыл бұрын
A female colleague and I had a good friendship and a lot in common. She was married and I was in a relationship, nothing romantic ever happened between us, it was just a workplace friendship. However, a trio of nasty, filthy minded women started making snide comments and remarks that she and I were having an affair. They targeted her quite aggressively for some reason. If we even spoke briefly in the cafeteria, guaranteed they would be scowling at us and hissing and whispering to each other. Because of their lowlife behaviour, we basically agreed that things should go back to us being colleagues only but it's never really gone away.
@TheoThomas-id4lg2 ай бұрын
Thank you, brother. I needed to hear this talk. I am a Greek Australian with a huge extended network of family extended family, distant family along with as family friends I was a wayward teen up until my early 20'd the usual stuff example if I didn't like what you were saying to 😮 wou have no problem in silencing you. I drank alot with the use of recreational drugs. I have a good sense of right and wrong .. o ce it a started becoming problematic I stopped, it didn't happen over night it actually took years. Now I have been clean a d sober for 24 years. I'm 58 now? What broke my he's completely was my return to Greece it was about one year ago that o went back after being away since 1988. Many of the Australian Greeks go back quite often, some go back every year. These are exactly the ones who almost killed me . Upon my return so many rumours of affairs drug taking ect. It tore me apart intact so much i didn't think I would ever recover my nerves, totally fried . And what you said resonated so much , why why why o couldn't fight our I am a quiet guy and o am of the philosophy of just don't hurt people and lots of others improvements I was at total peace on arrival in gree8 it lasted about 3 weeks then I felt alot of mainly the Australian Greeks that like you I felt a jealousy. That was palpable I am nothing spe and due to my asd adhd I have missed alot of my millstone achievements, I'm not loaded with cas either. But I'm a pretty fit guy and I k how to handle myself physically and to paint the full picture I am a very good-looking guy and anytime in life I could ha e my choice in woman but I have always been very conservative and never could sleep around it never was or will be me I said all that to say this jealousy is a insidious disease I was expecting the Australian Greeks to see me as the changed man I am today I have been happily married for 24 years I stopped gossiping 30 years ago and I am a ver6 stong beliver in forgiveness. I am getting back close to where I was But it totally blindsighted me and almost completely destroyed me To this day no one has had the balls to come up to me and directly accuse me of sleeping around while away from my wife. Again what hurt me more than anything thst my fist cousin perpetrated the rummo6 and I thought we had a good relationship I did laugh it if as being ridiculous and if I had just hung in there for a bit longer a bit of a rant but yes, jealousy I can only imagine what is festering in their souls to actually feel better by making others suffer I have gone back to compassion as it's the most economical emotion and praying for them 🙏 ❤️ bless you and thank your brief talk was the miss link 🙏 in helping me back to a good life .thsns again