Triforce! #22 - Prepping for Disaster

[@DamienFatePlays]

I love that Sip's reaction in emergencies is basically do play dead

[@pepiphany]

Better than mine, which is to just die.

[@SuperExodian]

mine is always shank a bitch... granted that wouldn't save me in a plane crash, but it'd make me feel better

[@benbullis7165]

Dying is a valid strategy. works for me 10 out of 10 times

[@pepiphany]

please don't stab me

[@benbullis7165]

I would... but i'm to kind and generous.... Not! *kindly stabs*

[@joebroughton4472]

i nearly spat out my dinner when sips said 8 year old Lebanese boy.

[@oliverpolo1]

I actually spat out my dinner when he told the screwdriver story.

[@KingMumble]

I spat out all the cum I was supposed to swallow

[@eric97909]

SPITTERS ARE QUITTERS!

[@alexwelsh6033]

2:34 And that's how the 8-year-old Lebanese child memes began

[@dustbuster1787]

Alex Welsh I was trying to find that part of the video

[@rileykierath4676]

the canadian in sips leaks through sometimes and you hear him go "yeah its pretty good eh?"

[@jonnydude69]

Probably the best one yet lads. Started out a bit slow but by 18 minutes in you were all fully geared and on track to hilarity. This podcast is really starting to take shape, I hope it stays around for a long time :)

[@pepiphany]

I'm not holding it hope, I fear this may go the way of the YogPod

[@jonnydude69]

Reen P I'm not so worried. The YogPod was something they put a lot of concious effort into. Back then there was a high market for podcasts as a relatively new form of media and they were keen to jump on it. It died basically when they ran out of production effort. I was wondering if this would last once we started getting reposts of audio but now at episode 22 I am confident we'll have at least a good chunk before these three lose their enthusiasm for each other. In fact my only real worry with this series is that lewis might try too hard to structure it, but so far he seems to have actually relaxed more as the episodes go on.

[@iprice77]

Awesome show, really hit a nice spot with these, look forward to enjoying them for as long as you choose to continue them :) And for the bitter people; everything ends eventually. Better to outlive things :P

[@theeutecticpoint]

+

[@pepiphany]

-

[@howardrobertson283]

That pyrion joke about the nuts under the tree didn't get enough recognition

[@joshyboy82]

that's because it was predictable. Lewis already used the metaphor with "It'll go for your nuts."

[@hiseval4281]

Breaking news: Pyrion Flax has been assassinated by squirels.

[@Cdgaming4U]

Update: Investigators suspect murder weapon to be screwdriver.

[@twanbijpost9050]

Update : Investigators found Pyrion's nuts in a tree.

[@oliverfritsch8323]

Investigators also found jizz and Laz gun burns around the scene.

[@indyjacob4597]

Investigators suspect that the prison gang Juggers were somehow involved.

[@Snxcc_]

lol the new R&M episode xD don't fuck with squirrels

[@frankaloons]

Lewis: "What if the bus was held up by hostages? Pyrion: "Held up by hostages?!? Lewis: "Yeah."

[@dustbuster1787]

Frankaloons lewis in a nutshell

[@MrGomlo]

MY BODY IS SO READY

[@skeets3384]

TAKE ME SIPS ;)

[@DanVR001]

N1994 U G4Y

[@desertrose5613]

22:50 "Remember, kids: if you're out in the wilderness, shoot the beh-ah with the fleh-ah; don't shoot it in the eh-ah. Be safe out theh-ah." I was laughing my fuckin' ass off at that.

[@DJ-bz9xx]

I was dying from laughter after hearing about Sips's response to all emergencies.

[@mistersparkrle]

I hate when my bus is hijacked by hostages.

[@anononomous]

The real question is where do you bury the survivors?

[@frdstrr]

These podcasts are getting better and this is so far the best!

[@conninator2000]

You lost me at "I'M THE CREAM OF THE CROP" Laughing has killed me one again, great podcast guys

[@Texicus_Reddicus]

I don't know much about philosophy or psychology, But I'm pretty sure, when bored, all men spend their time imaging what they'd do in emergency scenarios

[@chris15782]

This is the funniest shit I have listened to in a while. You guys are really on point with this podcast. I think the regular schedule over the last few episodes has done you well. Keep up the great work guys!

[@Gunbudder]

"The JERK store called... and they're all out of YOU" (said while holding a MASSIVE bucket of shrimp)

[@squirrel6475]

Watch your back, Flax.

[@SquaresToOvals]

A squirrel breaks into Sips' house in the night. Sips reaches for his emergency plan under his bed. He grabs his trusty screwdriver, looks at it, and induces fainting. Sips' kids chase the squirrel out of the house.

[@FriendlyKat]

"The garbage store called and they're all out of you!" xD

[@modussceleris8040]

Seinfeld is such a fucking amazing show

[@elkano]

I'm picturing the grabby grabber as the teeth on a spring that Data has in The Goonies.

[@datboi7990]

elkano Hahahaha me to and i tgen pictured bodega having a boxing glove launcher too

[@flimpeenflarmpoon1353]

41:42 If you're here for BODEGA lol

[@johnmacdonald812]

41:07 The continuation of Bodega.

[@braindeadcast7476]

One of the best ones yet. Bodega is so perfect for this podcast!

[@meiji4785]

I would like that "Shoot the bear with the flare, don't shoot it at the air. Be safe out there." on a TShirt.

[@cyan_god]

Man, Sips is always great, but he was fucking on point throughout this entire episode. Good stuff

[@sweatilaa5325]

Sips is my cocaine

[@executive1946]

Wrap sips in paper and put him inside your mouth?

[@deanofcool]

Pyrion couldn't bee more wrong. A squirrel bit my mums finger once, it moved like lightning, you'd have never got hold of it.

[@zanderrose]

This is truly a classic of the Triforce Podcast. The Lebanese boy joke, Pyrion cuts a promo on squirrels, Sips wants to black out at the first sight of danger, holy fuck my abs hurt from laughing.

[@illumaQ]

22:42 Shoot the bear with the flare!

[@jakeypakey2]

I love this podcast. Where else do a couple English chaps and a Canuck chat about strip clubs, cigarettes, and OC Sci fi?

[@transorm987]

I'll tel you where yogscast

[@lewiskentmedia6173]

One English, a Canadian and a Lebanese 9 year old

[@davo9407]

+Lewis Kent two dads and an 8 year old Lebanese child

[@jackasw3921]

its 2 am and i was just about to go to bed then i see. #22 - 16 minutes ago. >.> im only here for bodega

[@withlovefromtom5]

I've taken to listening to these whilst doing Uni Art work. Suddenly (43:49) "Bodega..." Cracked up ruining 7 hours of Line work. Stay beautiful guys.

[@ashenone1996]

From that screwdriver story to an innocent dad joke about garfield, The Best Guy

[@BaconBot360games]

"I don't give a sh*t about justice! I'm not looking after two kids from 9 to 5!" -sips 2016

[@bardicben]

being someone who stuck his hand in a wood-chipper, I was praying to blackout immediately after.

[@MrGazlc81]

Best podcast anywhere. Love the chemistry between them.

[@1mikerider]

Love these triforce podcasts! Hilarious.. So glad it's now coming out regularly..

[@ArcaneCookie]

this is a fucking good one boys

[@inger2327]

ON THE ROAD AGAIN

[@inger2327]

hehe

[@harrisonblachford5426]

Callum Woolse

[@ashenone1996]

Think he just tried to tag someone on youtube

[@DyllonSlaboda]

Not even 3 minutes in and I'm already dying with laughter.

[@DarthMalnu]

As a fellow stay at home dad, I salute you gents!

[@Mattokai]

Darth Malnu And I you, fellow pro dad!

[@ryan252525252525]

I love the tri-force podcasts. The waffling is great.

[@DamienFatePlays]

Best thing to listen to while at work :D

[@skeets3384]

I listen to this in class man

[@SmellyBigFoot]

I save these beauties whether I'm watching the sunset... by myself :`I Forever Alone chin starts growing

[@WhitieWu]

Lewis' reason for why he stopped playing WoW is the exact same as my own. Really love these podcasts, and appreciate them. They make my Friday nights at work more bearable.

[@bobthedj6992]

Sips is describing the rim world version of a squirrel attack

[@majorphysics3669]

I'd like to point out, living in black bear country, we're told 1. Carry bear spray and learn how to use it properly. 2. If you just come across a bear and it doesnt notice you, back up slowly, dont turn around or run until you're well away. If the bear sees you and starts coming towards you, open a jacket or something to make you look bigger, make lots of noise, all while backing up slowly. 3. If you notice a black bear following you, and heres the real deal, we're told that thats a predatory hunting bear, and that you're gonna have to fight it. Literally. Playing dead wont help because it wants to eat you, running away doesnt work because its faster than you, "maybe" you could scare it, but honestly its bear spray or boxing.

[@Impulse_9]

My favorite podcast until now. Full of funny stuff. I like how it's got recurring sections and themes. Awesome job. Bodega is so fucking great, it'd be a perfect Todd McFarlane comic, I can't wait for part cuatro

[@sam23696]

Damn, the ending Lewis suggested where it turned out the celebration was his Birthday would have been perfect for this episode. I like the epic storyline to have the under current of him making horrific mistakes.

[@joinphil3418]

god i laughed so hard at this one, the constant references to previous mentions was great

[@GuyIncognito233]

Pyrion's story sounds like something out of rick and morty

[@xBonesTV]

the blackout part, i was laughing so hard i almost blackedout. he he he

[@ieyke]

Bodega is an entire universe constructed of Flaxisms.

[@DeadBeat1azy]

BODEGA FANFIC Borneo Sasmat sat in his big leather chair, cruising at a constant of 3 quarks per nanomode. He puffed on a smagslug cigar and wondered what all the planet-ers did, grounded in their measly pathetic lives. Caught in speculating he didn't notice the large Spuloopian cruiser on his 6. In fact he was so lost in thought he didn't notice the Spuloopians until 6 months later, when he was sick into his porridge one morning and he saw a small blue object, roughly the shape of a d20, nestled amongst the barf. "Dang it", he thought, looking at the other prisoners, things weren't as the seemed to be. He wasn't in a memro pod, nostalgicly reliving the nursery years on Androt IV, but instead in some Meteor gulag in the ass end of nowhere. All he knew was that it wasn't going to stay like this for long. Reaching into his 4th armpit he pulled out a small folded playing card. He chuckled, looking at the Siturian chick in the cowgirl outfit and slowly scratched at the bottom of the card. He pressed the intercoms and heard the rough, but comforting voice down on the other end of the line, he knew he would be out of here in no time. "Hey, Bodega speaking."

[@DeadBeat1azy]

Feedback appreciated

[@justshidded2749]

Fooking love it

[@DeadBeat1azy]

Mr. Business Haha thanks a lot man, should I tweet it to Pyrion?

[@justshidded2749]

Solomon French Of course

[@F_I_J_I_W_A_T_E_R]

WTF is up with the canon in this, Do you even know a scrap of info about the Bodega canon?! Borneo Sasmat prefers ShmarkleGlab cigars!

[@ashenone1996]

I honestly thought when p-flax was saying "The'yre not just kids, they're YOUR two kids" that he was going to berate sips for not looking after his own kids, but nah the following words from the flax were "That makes it WORSE" lmfao thank you triforce

[@marioornot]

keep em coming! this is my favourite podcast by far!

[@TheWalrusKing_]

What a great birthday present for me, this episode is so good.

[@tomburgess8485]

You'd black out, wake up in s bamboo forest, and then a golden Labrador would come up to you.

[@chibiauthor]

28:30 Sips is right, this is like every basement I went to here in canada

[@OfficialMorda]

Sips' example of crazy is also known as 'Insane'

[@tecnicstudios]

28:47... that sounds a lot like my house.... i thought every home had differences

[@saragalea9134]

The numbers thing is the opposite of censoring yourself. People use it to stop chat filters from removing the words

[@emilandersen8804]

Good point.

[@elliottarnold3104]

After all these years, I feel like this podcast may just be filling a very skyrim-shaped hole in my heart.

[@269tron]

The government should start developing Squirrel Weaponry for military usage. We would never be defeated.

[@indyjacob4597]

"Sir! The Americans are Squirrel Raiding again!" "Repeat that?" "They are attacking us with Squirrels!" "What are you on son? There isn't a Squirrel for miles around!" Last words of Sgt. [REDACTED] and Gen. [REDACTED], at the Massacre of Squirrel Hill.

[@aidanscovers]

in airborne school in the army they used to say don't worry if both your chutes don't open you might die before you hit the ground most people have a heart attack and die before they hit

[@indio6139]

This is the best one yet

[@chetcutj]

I remember people at my school use to say "pen 15" instead of "Penis"

[@trident1125]

And people some how found it funny :P

[@LucianoThePig]

Have you ever been to PenIsland?

[@ThisAMJ]

LucianoThePig no. Smosh sucks.

[@meanderriver347]

we had it as a sort of "club" where you would have to have it written on the back of your hand. This usually happened to people who didn't know what it was and we would write it on them before they figured it out.

[@fluffinn]

These podcasts are the highlight of my week

[@LucianoThePig]

The Scramboots make me think of scrambled eggs

[@CequalD]

Can somebody please turn all the Bodega chapters into an animated short? I'm dying for this.

[@Oberonjames]

There was this story in the news were a woman and her dog had gone into the woods without a gun in Northern Canada and gotten lost. They were being stalked by a hungry wolf. They couldn't run, because then the wolf would charge, so they trying to speed walk away from her when they ran into a bear cub. The woman saw the bear's mother off to the side standing up and glaring at her. She then decided to charge the cub. Both the hungry wolf and mother bear charged after her, but the bear thought the wolf was a bigger threat, so she attacked it instead and the woman and her dog ran off into the forest while the bear and the wolf fought to the death.

[@thatguy6919]

To answer Pyrions question the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s^2 so 10 meters per second of speed and the best idea is to back away from bears but appear big to mountain lions but some bears are different and wolves aren't aggressive to people often at all.

[@SuperMonty1]

NEEEEEEEEEEERD

[@yoavd4334]

LMFAO the bear and flare part should be animated

[@cooperkeating2814]

Man, shooting a bear with a flare gun reminds me of the hunted challenge from The Long Dark and the hours that bear stalked me...

[@kismetsno.musicuk6295]

bring back some of the longer episodes, maybe about 90 mins. Despite, i always love the show

[@kingkuma4112]

22:46 - epic bear rap

[@fortunatetalisman]

Have you seen videos of squirrels? They are fast as hell! Thinking about it ... *BLACKS OUT*

[@Will-ik9wl]

Sips is so legendary for creating this meme

[@renzenriquez8672]

This podcast makes my day every time :')

[@rgrimmes8760]

HAHAHA Oh man I'm trying to catch up on this series and this is by far my favorite video!! The squirrel talk..Oh man. It's great!!!

[@mayhem296]

Love Bodega! Keep up the great work guys!

[@ashenone1996]

Fair enough sips, but i'd say there is a fine line between swearing and casual racism xD

[@jacobdemuth7803]

My friend was bitten in the neck by a squirrel. You couldn't just punch it because the jaws LOCK. As a professional hunter he just snapped its neck, and went to A&E with this dead squirrel neck tie clamped to his neck...

[@vrostar]

What a nice way to spend my evening ;)

[@TeamVanityVideos]

fuck this is a good episode, so many good moments.

[@MiotaLee]

Fucken love Bodega. I somehow keep imagining it as some sort of maashup between rick and morty, axe cop and eaon flux.

[@pixie_leaf]

Honestly, I would 100% buy a printed copy of all the Bodega fics compiled together if pflax writes more 😂 like a set of short stories set in the same universe.

[@Bennetherway]

I had a fight with a squirrel.. little bugger climbed under my shirt.

[@misgiggidy]

Terminal velocity of a human being is about 120 MPH, nowhere near splat speed. Squirrels are vicious.

[@feyn5869]

Best podcast on youtube.

[@DoctorFaceMelt]

Pyrion Flax is Simon Skinner from Hot Fuzz. "Splat The Rat!"

[@SoundsOfTheWildYT]

High five to Lewis for the IT crowd reference

[@buzzthebuzzard5267]

Best one yet!!

[@3DRiley_]

I would try the falling off the roof of a 12 story building but it might be hard to share my experience...

[@flimpeenflarmpoon1353]

That Squirrel Promo was Macho Man esque

[@LucianoThePig]

25:54 for the squirrels

[@jafro8]

Tom Hanks blacked out in castaway after he extracted his tooth lol

[@Samedayservice1]

I'm watching this in Daytona beach Florida. Title fits

[@silvernug]

The N Word conversation reminded me of my favorite voice line from Morrowind. Since there wasn't much voice acting in it, you'd hear some one call you an N Wah almost constantly.

[@MrJakobMovies]

i imagine bodega being animated like the Heavy metal movie