You Are Giving DANGEROUS Advice To Women! - This Debate CHANGED Her Mind

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Destiny

Destiny

Күн бұрын

DEBATE: Destiny tries to give normie relationship advice but blows up on twitter and escalates into wild and a lot of bad faith interpretations...
Date: Jun 14, 2021
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@destiny
@destiny 3 жыл бұрын
Do you ask Reddit for dating advice? Timestamps Click 0:00 - Teaser/Intro 0:11 - The tweet and context 4:10 - Debate start 7:22 - "I feel that's a fair point..." 16:03 - Consequences of giving advice that doesn't map onto reality 25:25 - Shit Reddit Says and "what about the mens?"
@WarIsOver25
@WarIsOver25 3 жыл бұрын
I ask your.... I ask your mom
@milamberyt
@milamberyt 3 жыл бұрын
reddit
@brandon-toddhutchinson3798
@brandon-toddhutchinson3798 3 жыл бұрын
Just don't date Just don't sex Just don't even Accept the new natural order ...Don't actually give up but -me? Unless I'm going with a friend or get an itinerary, I will not be in your house 😂 EZ fold Edit [added the following] _Dating advice from any source, I take with various amounts of salt. I check Reddit to hear stories about how common or uncommon phenomenon are. I "get advice" (that i don't really use) from KZbin_
@Un4tunate_
@Un4tunate_ 3 жыл бұрын
Reddit always provides the best answers. I default to reddit for legal advice, relationship advice, life advice, and advice on where to get advice.
@chegorilla1468
@chegorilla1468 3 жыл бұрын
C'mon, we all know you invite Hassan over to play games because of the... implication.
@trulytrue8008
@trulytrue8008 3 жыл бұрын
Had a dinner date with a girl. It was good. She invited me back to her place, and before my brain could begin formulating expectations, possibilities, or hypotheticals, she immediately contextualized it by saying "But I don't want to be physical tonight." And I said "okay." Easy. Using words works wonders.
@ActuallyJozu
@ActuallyJozu 3 жыл бұрын
Using words with actual other human beings is super hard for these depersonalized Twitter and video game addicts that are terminally online.
@tento3555
@tento3555 3 жыл бұрын
Wait what???? Lmao did you guys play fortnite or something?
@knes167
@knes167 3 жыл бұрын
@@ActuallyJozu Using your wer-erds? How does one learn this power oh wise one :O
@notlogix4413
@notlogix4413 3 жыл бұрын
Right after she said that, I’d have a ghost call from my “aunt” that her dog is sick. Buh-Bye!!!
@BKDBut
@BKDBut 3 жыл бұрын
A large problem with this take is it assumes girls/women vocalize that. Women often don't vocalize and instead assume you can read their mind. Also, if I were in that situation as the guy, I'd just say, "OK, that's cool, let's go find something else to do."
@shvinehoond
@shvinehoond 3 жыл бұрын
Imagine losing a debate to Destiny and he invites you back to his house afterwards. You watch him play factorio for two hours, then he blows you. Fucking weird. Guarantee that scenario has happened more than once.
@AnAngryMarauder
@AnAngryMarauder 3 жыл бұрын
Kinda hot honestly
@totom.8095
@totom.8095 3 жыл бұрын
he said he's never invited a dude over
@emilfilipov169
@emilfilipov169 3 жыл бұрын
@@wisemage0 denims is a lot of fun. Well at least her debates with destiny are as entertaining as listening to Indians blabber on in Indian on a meeting with the english CTO AND CEO because half of them can't speak English and need translation.
@grey-pilled5253
@grey-pilled5253 3 жыл бұрын
@Godded Modded that's about as biphobia as it gets man lmao, don't go around denying people's sexuality just because you disagree with them politically.
@thatindiandude4602
@thatindiandude4602 3 жыл бұрын
@@emilfilipov169 Indians don't speak Indian. Just as the Canadians don't speak Canadian. Hell, India is essentially collection of two dozen nation states with their own ethnic identity cobbled together.
@LeftEyeless
@LeftEyeless 3 жыл бұрын
Only Twitter/Reddit could turn advice such as telling women "don't invite strange men over to your place" into a Pro-rape stance 😂
@pikemand1410
@pikemand1410 3 жыл бұрын
"Actions can have social significance and certain actions, like inviting someone to your home after a date, have clear implicit meanings" "Uuuuuuh, so basically you're saying that silence is consent?!?" Every single time, these people are literally incapable of having an honest conversation.
@sachinvenkatram950
@sachinvenkatram950 3 жыл бұрын
To be fair this person just seemed to have become so confused and deranged by all the dogshit takes out there, she didn't come off as bad faith to me.
@findlayrankin9769
@findlayrankin9769 3 жыл бұрын
That’s what he’s saying it’s these talking point warriors on Twitter and Reddit muddying the water that is the discussion, they hear sex and dating and they latch on to things like consent, rape and toxic masculinity, the literal worst case scenario possible.
@Lynn-iw2ds
@Lynn-iw2ds 3 жыл бұрын
@@uhhhfrick9767 well um acshually... 🤓☝
@bk1507
@bk1507 3 жыл бұрын
clear, implicit. choose one.
@pikemand1410
@pikemand1410 3 жыл бұрын
@@bk1507 these are not opposed concepts, at all. Like, the idea that inviting someone over after a date is an implicit invitation to sex is so established that even if you have a fucking spectrum disorder that makes you completely unable to read people you should still know about it simply from cultural osmosis.
@lucasgoncalvesdefaria7121
@lucasgoncalvesdefaria7121 3 жыл бұрын
Dating Subs should REALLY have a disclaimer that you are getting advice from teenagers who have never dated.
@CorwinTheOneAndOnly
@CorwinTheOneAndOnly 3 жыл бұрын
As well as the countless articles and hearsay where women will get advice about men... from other women. And men getting advice about women from other men. How bout we all just ask the other ourselves, instead.
@findlayrankin9769
@findlayrankin9769 3 жыл бұрын
Plenty of people online lie as some coping strategy. Advice threads and dating are the worst cause they can lie about sexual experiences without bragging, they are in fact bragging but it’s hidden under the disguise of “giving advice” When I see a post of a guy claiming he dated a girl for 5 years who just left him one day, I’m already sceptical cause there are so many details he’s not mentioning with the purpose of making himself look better. He might not be lying in this case but he’s leaving out key information on purpose.
@StoneEdwards
@StoneEdwards 3 жыл бұрын
The sad thing is subreddit he linked is specifically for people dating over 30. Having spent a bit of time on there after turning single again over 30 I can confirm most people there are in fact adults over 30, just a lot of them are totally clueless
@xDDufiosy
@xDDufiosy 3 жыл бұрын
@@StoneEdwards the pool of incel-like 30 year olds is rapidly expanding.
@StoneEdwards
@StoneEdwards 3 жыл бұрын
@@xDDufiosy yeah that's fair. For the most part this sub has good advice though, just some takes like that one can be a little off.
@poifish7442
@poifish7442 3 жыл бұрын
the girl destiny's talking with has the demeanor of a therapist that doesnt know exactly know what to do with what the client's saying, but is trying her best
@blinkanddie3397
@blinkanddie3397 3 жыл бұрын
hahaha, yeah
@hunterthompson6737
@hunterthompson6737 3 жыл бұрын
she doesn't even sound like she knows what she is talking about.
@ROMANSv1212
@ROMANSv1212 3 жыл бұрын
To me, early on in the conversation, it sounded like she knew Destiny was completely 100 percent correct but she couldn't bring herself to say as much and then finish the conversation much sooner than the entire length of this video. She had to save face and it was excruciating to listen to.
@handsomebear.
@handsomebear. 3 жыл бұрын
She's just completely stuck in her own ideological frame and can't think outside it, her minds just goes back to "mhm, mhm...you need to tell all men not to r 4p3 or they will do it. Mhm, mhm...women have no agency and men are r 4p1sts. Mhm." Jesus Christ.
@DT-bp2om
@DT-bp2om 3 жыл бұрын
That is so spot on. Dishonesty is at the heart of it.
@RealFreedomMG
@RealFreedomMG 3 жыл бұрын
1:43 "We're talking about inviting someone over after a deba... date" lol
@toomuchmidi
@toomuchmidi 3 жыл бұрын
Vaush was right, debates DO make Destiny horny. 😳
@joeandrew8752
@joeandrew8752 3 жыл бұрын
@@toomuchmidi destiny: "talk dirty to me" Vaush: " I've surpassed you intellectually"
@andersmeisner1642
@andersmeisner1642 3 жыл бұрын
@@joeandrew8752 Destiny is so horny that he keeps it on repeat, even while he streams.
@redfogwhitefrost2583
@redfogwhitefrost2583 3 жыл бұрын
I had to go back to listen again. God damnit lol
@wxedsanddokx
@wxedsanddokx 3 жыл бұрын
Erotic fan fic in the making
@TheDraco175
@TheDraco175 3 жыл бұрын
This reminds me of a thing way back in the day where Thunderf00t was being called a rape apologist because he said women should be wary of drugged drinks at a party.
@andrepylon12
@andrepylon12 3 жыл бұрын
Good old thunderf00t I miss his old incarnation.
@raz0rcarich99
@raz0rcarich99 3 жыл бұрын
@@andrepylon12 What do you mean??? Everybody loooves his constant screeching about new tech 😂
@subzoronltd7779
@subzoronltd7779 3 жыл бұрын
@@andrepylon12 I quite like he's gone away from all the anti sjw stuff these days and focuses more on debunking stuff. Low key enjoy his content these days even though I'm more left politically.
@JohnDoe-zh6cp
@JohnDoe-zh6cp 3 жыл бұрын
@@subzoronltd7779 He’s actually not right wing except for the anti-feminism stuff. He posted an anti-trump video and half of his base was in an uproar.
@ExeErdna
@ExeErdna 3 жыл бұрын
What happens now, women are now wary of drugged drinks at parties since it isn't just men but women drugging drinks.
@mario167100
@mario167100 3 жыл бұрын
This is how we know the internet has destroyed a generation. Like, I would have never thought that assuming intercourse could or would take place if you invite a date to your place would be controversial.
@alexd4566
@alexd4566 3 жыл бұрын
That’s true, the assumption or expectation is there, but that doesn’t mean intercourse MUST take place. It might be that the woman changes her mind while at her place. I know Destiny acknowledges this, but I think that’s what most people that don’t know him attack him on
@dt9773
@dt9773 3 жыл бұрын
I believe his words on this were a bit more stringent than that. I believe he tweeted out that you shouldn’t invite someone to your house unless you’re comfortable sleeping with them.
@kyre4189
@kyre4189 3 жыл бұрын
it's controversial on the internet but IRL no one thinks like this
@d-extra5814
@d-extra5814 3 жыл бұрын
So controversial that they label you a RP LMAO like gtfo with that garbage. Twitter breeds Brain rot
@yeahokaycoolcool
@yeahokaycoolcool 3 жыл бұрын
It's never been controversial to me or anyone I know around my age. Pretty wild.
@kdawson020279
@kdawson020279 3 жыл бұрын
I'm a survivor of sexual assault when I was at college. I let a friend of a friend come hang out after a party, and I woke up to the most terrifying moments of my life. I was intoxicated, and in no position to give consent for what happened if that was what I wanted which it was not. I've also been married for 19 years. The major point is to be clear about boundaries when things go from social to intimate when and if they do to make sure that people don't make false assumptions. No still means no, but once you're alone in your own home with someone, you're not in great shape to deal with it if things go wrong. Be safe, and don't rush things.
@Fillegubben
@Fillegubben 3 жыл бұрын
A major thing here except that people are mixing up hanging out with a friend vs being on a date, is the common theme of leftists/left leaning people fantasizing about the ideal scenario where everyone understands consent in the same way, has the same amount of social competence etc, whereas how Destiny talks about it is how most "regular" people will see it, it's generally understood
@sweaspurdoddd5466
@sweaspurdoddd5466 3 жыл бұрын
Leftists are generally living in their own reality. That's why they write entire paragraphs in their memes. They need to explain their punchline in the context of their own reality because otherwise normal people will not understand.
@aaendi6661
@aaendi6661 3 жыл бұрын
Didn't watch the video yet, but judging from the comment, is she one of those women who think it's sexual harassment to ask a woman out on a date?
@michaelschupska2047
@michaelschupska2047 3 жыл бұрын
Destiny's perspective is also just the actual perspective of sex havers or anyone who has actually dated in the real world. I don't know, in my 31 years, I have NEVER given nor gotten the invite over to the house after a date to just play video games and chill... seriously never.
@tarfielarchelone2674
@tarfielarchelone2674 3 жыл бұрын
@@michaelschupska2047 I did but that was the literal point of the after date plan (we still had sex the morning after though)
@amrcnngrmny
@amrcnngrmny 3 жыл бұрын
100%
@WildSeven19
@WildSeven19 3 жыл бұрын
It's a mistake in general to take dating advice from a Yu Gi Oh villain.
@hazzardalsohazzard2624
@hazzardalsohazzard2624 3 жыл бұрын
Are you about to tell me Yubel isn't a villain?
@WildSeven19
@WildSeven19 3 жыл бұрын
@@hazzardalsohazzard2624 Yubel is definitely a villain, but being a mommy gf supercedes that.
@hazzardalsohazzard2624
@hazzardalsohazzard2624 3 жыл бұрын
@@WildSeven19 Oh Mommy gf villain, please give me dating advice.
@knes167
@knes167 3 жыл бұрын
"Oh JAAAAAA-dennnnnn. Wanna come back to my dimension?"
@nskeow
@nskeow 3 жыл бұрын
Its so funny how anything Destiny tweets becomes discourse for at least a week lol Edit: also squadW my Maaan 😎
@nskeow
@nskeow 3 жыл бұрын
*Destiny's friend 👀
@evolution__snow6784
@evolution__snow6784 3 жыл бұрын
Destiny lives rent free in the heads of rose Twitter, they all hate him but all follow him
@everybodywantsitall9827
@everybodywantsitall9827 3 жыл бұрын
Wait until vaush picks it up
@karimshebeika8010
@karimshebeika8010 3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodywantsitall9827 nah he has outpaced him intellectually...
@Zeffpenguin
@Zeffpenguin 3 жыл бұрын
He tweets with that specific intent, like his tweets are obviously bait
@ObesetoBeast
@ObesetoBeast 3 жыл бұрын
Celibacy is the only solution here 😌
@Tocinos
@Tocinos 3 жыл бұрын
blue hair
@DieNibelungenliad
@DieNibelungenliad 3 жыл бұрын
When ancient Rome had too much "degeneracy" (sensual overload or oversensitization or hedonism), some men had enough of the wild parties and moved to a cave nearby to live calmly and quietly with nature and with less by themselves.
@DianaCHewitt
@DianaCHewitt 3 жыл бұрын
@@DieNibelungenliad sounds made up
@gaussminigun7095
@gaussminigun7095 3 жыл бұрын
sounds gay
@hugonamenlos7218
@hugonamenlos7218 3 жыл бұрын
Not long until i will become a wizard
@keggerous
@keggerous 3 жыл бұрын
I actually fell victim to this kind of advice years ago. A girl wanted to come over and I asked a friend of mine what I should do. She basically gave me the sexless feminist take Destiny is talking about. When she got to my place she was dressed up REAL sexy like. My dumbass offered to play video games with her. I asked her if she wanted to go to the park and smoke weed. Some cringe shit like that. Looking back I realize that the advice I got was basically the worst thing I could have done. She WANTED to have sex. She came over TO HAVE SEX and what did I do? Completely went against my gut instincts. All because I wanted to be a "nice guy" and not pressure her or make her feel uncomfortable. To add insult to injury, I met her at a party some months later and she literally clowned on me for not making "a move". Now I'll just push the issue verbally or in a text before we hang out. Make it 100% clear that sex is expected.
@extremepostyo5242
@extremepostyo5242 3 жыл бұрын
This is a good video. As a hopeless guy I will be honest that there are so many conflicting pieces of advice. It's either don't be yourself or just be yourself. But if being shy or socially inept is a part of what you consider to be yourself then the advice is dog shit. The advice should be to be a confident version of yourself that doesn't harm other ppl. I think the issue is that there are a bunch of non verbal queues that seem so obvious to many ppl that they never think to even mention to ppl struggling with these problems. Kind of like a job or skill that you have a bunch of subtle interactions between point A and point B. Trying to go from point A to point B without these subtle interactions leads ppl to failure. Failure leads to frustration. Also leading to a bunch of other negative outcomes. I remember not understanding the signs of a woman wanting for me to dance with her on the dance floor of a club. My friend said that the signs were obvious but never explained what the signs were. Then failed attempts in the future reinforced poor self esteem and self doubt. So even when I was almost sure of those signs I wouldn't act on them because I didn't want to make a mistake and annoy ppl. Essentially I'm a fuck up but I forgive myself.
@Fillegubben
@Fillegubben 3 жыл бұрын
You bring up a good point and it’s gonna need to be discussed more, this is turning into a huge problem in developed countries with men that end up alone. These set “rules” people talk about in these scenarios only matter if you’re somewhat socially competent
@alexd4566
@alexd4566 3 жыл бұрын
The rule I live by is to be happy with who I am and be confident in my own abilities, but to take every opportunity to improve myself. I always strive to become a better person than I am right now. I just tell myself “I can’t improve myself right now, at this very moment, and I have to accept that, but I can improve myself over time and as long as I’m taking steps to become a better person, I should be proud of myself”. That’s the mentality that seems to make me the most fulfilled
@DieNibelungenliad
@DieNibelungenliad 3 жыл бұрын
Hopeless guy? Goodness me. If your life revolves around dating and you aren't attractive according to the cultural norm, you're setting yourself up for failure.
@signallos
@signallos 3 жыл бұрын
Watch Maccabre Storytelling’s video on Dating. He talks about that in a pretty good segment and gives some pretty solid advice.
@Fillegubben
@Fillegubben 3 жыл бұрын
@@DieNibelungenliad it’s not like you need to be attractive as a man, it’s just a plus. Also most people’s lives are centered around wanting some sort of partner
@TheGIGACapitalist
@TheGIGACapitalist 3 жыл бұрын
I think a lot of people are arguing how things ought to be not how things are. I wish I lived in a world like those people are describing it. It would probably make it a lot easier to get women to come over to the social room in my condo building with a poker table and pool table, it would make it way easier to have cheap fun dates. But women are often hesitant because they know what the implication is of going to someone's place is and how are they even supposed to know if this room actually exists?
@lordoflobsters7254
@lordoflobsters7254 3 жыл бұрын
I dont know how people disagree with this take, holy shit online discourse is so out of hand
@roymarshall_
@roymarshall_ 3 жыл бұрын
Just imagine going on a date with a terminally online person
@avarice4556
@avarice4556 3 жыл бұрын
@@roymarshall_ Ever met someone you've talked shit with online? I hated this chick actual Trump kool-aid drinker, She was a literal psycho. Met her in real life she still was as much of a crazy B as she was online, she even was racist talking about how "Obama is from Kenya". But the sex was great, loved the situation so much. Don't love her at all, but the entire thing was mad entertaining.
@TheRiviaWitcher
@TheRiviaWitcher 3 жыл бұрын
@@avarice4556 and then you woke up?
@Crissybooable
@Crissybooable 3 жыл бұрын
His tweet wasn’t super clear but when he explained it it made more sense to me . I think in an ideal world you could talk about your expectations about going back to someone’s house but it’s not always like that .
@RueRyuzaki6
@RueRyuzaki6 3 жыл бұрын
These are people that have probably never went on a date/been invited to someones house after a date.
@FifaTaco
@FifaTaco 3 жыл бұрын
I cant be the only one who heard him almost say "you're inviting a girl over after a debate" lmaooooo
@Lightningkuriboh
@Lightningkuriboh 3 жыл бұрын
I THOUGHT I HEARD THAT TOO
@masterblaster6703
@masterblaster6703 2 жыл бұрын
Things you randomly brought up ended up helping me, even though I don't think it was your intention. 19:50, I've never dated before and a girl was giving me weird signals, being very touchy, even cuddling me, and generally being very sweet to me, wasn't interested in me at all. I was strung along like this for a while and it really messed with my head. Thanks for helping me realize how this is even weirder than I thought it was.
@Knighthawkbro
@Knighthawkbro 3 жыл бұрын
The Tumblr porn implosion and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race.
@josephb456
@josephb456 3 жыл бұрын
When he was talking about looking back 9 years and wondering if the girl was making a move - there were actual flashbacks occurring in my brain. Shame. Pain.
@hugonamenlos7218
@hugonamenlos7218 3 жыл бұрын
Same man, something to keep me awake tonight
@RoseEyed
@RoseEyed 3 жыл бұрын
I'm a woman and I've had the same experience with guys looking back. Didn't realize they were flirting with me until years later. It happens to the best of us!
@josephb456
@josephb456 3 жыл бұрын
@@RoseEyed one time this girl wouldn't let me leave the bar by myself, put me in her car, and then in her bed with her- in my head the entire time I was like- "wow this girl really cares that I make it home safe." WHAT
@RoseEyed
@RoseEyed 3 жыл бұрын
@@josephb456 ha yeah that one was pretty obvious. I know one college classmate and I both liked this one show, so we agreed to watch it live in the dorm lounge every week. One week he said he needed to go to his room to get something and I agreed to go with him since the show hadn’t started yet. Honestly didn’t think anything of it-I really did see this dude as a friend and I really was just there to watch the show. So in his room I’m sitting on his couch and he takes off his shirt cause it “had a stain on it.” I had no reaction. We go back to the lounge and watch the show. Years later I realize he may have thought I wanted to sleep with him and did the whole “dorm room shirt thing” as a way to see if I was interested. Clearly I wasn’t. But that’s ALSO why double checking to see if the person really is interested before making a move is so important. Would’ve been really awkward otherwise. XD
@Nightknight1992
@Nightknight1992 3 жыл бұрын
@@RoseEyed i think its worse for men cuz they would generally be down if theyd understand what the girls were hinting at :D
@MacabreStorytelling
@MacabreStorytelling 3 жыл бұрын
This is so true. I understand it is difficult for people to want to talk openly about the complexities of consent, but the alternative, of NOT talking about it or giving idealistic information, is just as damaging if not more so and even potentially dangerous.
@GeneralMGuy
@GeneralMGuy 3 жыл бұрын
The best point made in this discussion is actually how twitter is not a good place for discourse. The site, and just about everyone on it, thrives on controversy. You have people saying that this person or that person has been mind fucked by online discourse but don't seem to see how it has infected them. I can't count how many times Destiny kept saying 'lefties online this' or 'lefties online that' and a plurality of his videos and just about everyone of his conversations are infected with the phantom of online twitter warriors. Seems like 95% of it is Twitter bullshit. All this dumb shit makes everyone crazy. Meanwhile IRL when I tell my niece 'don't invite guys home' I don't have to warrior about twitter mobs or have to worry about twitter hate. Probably best to tell people not to shop online for real world dating advice.
@ShimonYaqulu
@ShimonYaqulu 3 жыл бұрын
wtf.
@shrisiva4016
@shrisiva4016 3 жыл бұрын
It's because Twitter's algorithm deliberately shows the most controversial tweets more to gain traction
@arabiannights5301
@arabiannights5301 3 жыл бұрын
That's sorta just human nature though isn't it? If it wasn't Twitter, it would be another site. We love bickering, arguing, getting one-ups on each other and even better if it can be done with some anonymity from behind a screen? Of course people are going to engage in sensationalist nonsense just for the hell of it
@GeneralMGuy
@GeneralMGuy 3 жыл бұрын
@@arabiannights5301 I do not believe Twitter or the internet is part of human nature. No more than I think obesity and racism is.
@GeneralMGuy
@GeneralMGuy 3 жыл бұрын
@@electron6825 tribalism? Who brought that up?
@dudebussylmao3062
@dudebussylmao3062 3 жыл бұрын
The most stupid part of this whole thing is the idea that setting up the expectation of sex is somehow entitling someone to sex. Yes, inviting someone to your place after a date is setting up the expectation for sex. No, inviting someone over after a date does not entitle them to sex (nor does anything else).
@xNinjamodx
@xNinjamodx 3 жыл бұрын
Destiny should do a call in segment where viewers or subs talk about their relationship concerns and things of that nature.
@EdgarFriendlysCivicsTeacher
@EdgarFriendlysCivicsTeacher 3 жыл бұрын
That would be great, politics may be more pressing on a large scale, but I speak to so many people that just want to talk about how to navigate the world as it seems to them. Maybe it's me being overly optimistic but I think people with congruent personal lives will make sounder decisions overall.
@xNinjamodx
@xNinjamodx 3 жыл бұрын
@@EdgarFriendlysCivicsTeacher Well put!
@staindk
@staindk 3 жыл бұрын
This is akin to being 8 and inviting an acquaintance over to your house - then when you get there you open your books and start with homework/studying and assume they will just fall in line to do the same. At that age (8) the norm for inviting a new friend over is to play! Get some snacks and fire up some video games etc. If you wanted to invite your new smart friend over to help with math homework, you would of course clarify that ahead of time as it is not the 'expected' generic 'hey wanna come over to my house (implied: to play)?' at 30+ trying to date, the implication has long moved away from 'do you wanna come over (to play boardgames/etc)' to what Destiny is suggesting - of course people should know this. If you wanted to invite someone over for some other reason, explain that to them at the point of inviting them, so that you don't send wrong signals.
@DeadMarine1980
@DeadMarine1980 3 жыл бұрын
It's amazing to me that people take sex advice from people online who never has sex.
@fabfabrice3434
@fabfabrice3434 3 жыл бұрын
"if you don't feel him, Dont invite him." His advice sounds a lot to "enthousiastic consent" to me
@andrelima4125
@andrelima4125 3 жыл бұрын
I love how it goes to "silence is consent" frame immedeatly. Destiny was just saying you should only invite someone over after a date if you believe theres a possibilty and you would be comfortable with it, he didn't say "oooh boy you gon get some" neither did he say to "expect to get it, guaranteed", people interact its not "hey we're here let's have sex" and at any time if the other person doesn't want it or is not comfortable or had the wrong idea it stops
@wishi6616
@wishi6616 3 жыл бұрын
I don't know if this is cringe or what but my favorite types of videos from Destiny are these ones where he just discusses a topic in the social world outside of politics and mostly just focuses on explain his experiences and how he thinks through them. I've always been a anxious dude so most of my time is spent alone where I'm comfortable but recently I've been trying to interact with more people and build new habits and such. So watching these social focused videos helps me feel like I'm "catching up" on a lot of social experiences I never had due to my insecurities and just general fears of going outside and meeting new people. So thanks dude.
@AimingAtYou
@AimingAtYou 3 жыл бұрын
Look Autismo, other people can't read your mind. Some will choose to see the tweet as bad, but some people will genuinly see it like that. Me as a long term fan of D-dog knew what you meant, but that's ONLY because I've watch well over 1000 hours of your shit!
@Twistedhippy
@Twistedhippy 3 жыл бұрын
Lol kinda truuuu
@uHasioorr
@uHasioorr 3 жыл бұрын
You don't have to be fan of Destiny or watch 1000 hours of his content, english doesn't have to be your native language to understand this tweet. People are just trying to make it into something that it is not.
@Astares9
@Astares9 3 жыл бұрын
@@uHasioorr never watched this dude before except when he debated a couple people a few years ago, forgot about him completely. don't know his positions on stuff really. that tweet is trifling shit, this is nonsense. anybody who thinks this is controversial is an idiot.
@dhammer5842
@dhammer5842 3 жыл бұрын
Have totally had the experience of being actively picked up at my place of work, i took her out to a late night, we went back to her hotel room, and once there she started playing hard to get, to a point where I felt like there was not consent. Then she (while wearing a t-shirt only in the bed with me wearing boxers only) said, "I think you should take what you want." OH, she has a dominance kink. Now she has affirmatively made it clear and a great time was had by all. These situations are difficult to navigate.
@christophergreen6595
@christophergreen6595 3 жыл бұрын
I find it funny-sad how some women don't 'get' when we're looking for consent. I've definitely been written off before as 'not into bdsm' because I wasn't socially aggressive, lol.
@darkmoon2744
@darkmoon2744 3 жыл бұрын
I don't use reddit for learning. I typically use sources like Books,KZbin, wikihow. Reddit does not appeal to me because it is pretty much limited in what it offers that pales in comparison to ideal sources.
@sydneemikumuren9812
@sydneemikumuren9812 3 жыл бұрын
wikihow, is this a meme?
@smithblack5945
@smithblack5945 3 жыл бұрын
You're on the wrong subreddits if you dont think that reddit is good for learning
@TheHeartlessHeroes
@TheHeartlessHeroes 3 жыл бұрын
Reddit is good for finding resources, but the actual people and content on Reddit can be extremely hit or miss.
@55Noco
@55Noco 3 жыл бұрын
I've had these arguments with the exact same people man. I was using the phrase ya gotta learn to play the game, a normal phrase. I got attacked for saying IT ISNT A GAME! I was like, do you know what I mean lol?
@chasingepiphanies7993
@chasingepiphanies7993 3 жыл бұрын
If your intention was to talk about how to stay safe then yeah, I don't think they understood what you meant. 'Game' was a term in the pick-up artist community, and most people nowadays understand 'having game' to mean you manipulate people in order to sleep with them.
@55Noco
@55Noco 3 жыл бұрын
@@chasingepiphanies7993 Ya no, I meant it more in terms of the older way. Kind of like the ebb and flow of interactions and reading each other, basically courting.
@crushinnihilism
@crushinnihilism 3 жыл бұрын
Thats also been my experience. We're thet young leftists? Theyre so highly focused on rhetoric that they completely miss meaning. Its like at some point people got so autistic about rhetoric they cant communicate in the real world, and god forbid if you like romantic language and metaphors.
@bibsp3556
@bibsp3556 3 жыл бұрын
god forbid people have fun
@55Noco
@55Noco 3 жыл бұрын
@@crushinnihilism Basically ya, they were younger, idk about leftist in particular. They just got butt hurt about it and assumed I was gamifying women or something stupid
@osamabindiesel3389
@osamabindiesel3389 3 жыл бұрын
Good to see destiny taking points from train and utilizing it to debate women squadW my maaan 😎🤙🤙
@DrevorReal
@DrevorReal 3 жыл бұрын
I get what Destiny is saying. However, I would rather like to live in a world where you can invite people of the opposite sex over without their being an expectation of sex.
@fraggberth
@fraggberth 3 жыл бұрын
You can, just do it outside the context of a date.
@DrevorReal
@DrevorReal 3 жыл бұрын
@@fraggberth kinda missing the point there.
@meatisomalley
@meatisomalley 3 жыл бұрын
@@fraggberth false. You can do it within the context of a date, just make it clear you don't want to have sex when you invite them over.
@GhostMan407
@GhostMan407 3 жыл бұрын
@@fraggberth if i invite someone over for a date i would wanna game and watch movies and shows and talk, I dont need sex unless she wants to. obviously id want to but i wouldnt expect anything with touch
@dougmattis9293
@dougmattis9293 3 жыл бұрын
Destiny used the word, "comfortable." This actually covers any and all scenarios about things privacy, disclosure, etc. Trusting someone to bring them into your home...you should be fully comfortable with all scenarios that could transpire. Otherwise, you put yourself in danger. If you know what the Line is for your own protection, draw it, communicate it, and do not compromise. This should be easy.
@tracertongsdong2267
@tracertongsdong2267 2 жыл бұрын
You cannot negotiate genuine desire.
@chasingepiphanies7993
@chasingepiphanies7993 3 жыл бұрын
Seems like miscommuncation on all sides. Destiny puts emphasis on the importance of reading situations and understanding assumptions we make when dating. The guest puts emphasis on communication so people can go beyond relying on such assumptions. Then they misinterpret each other as saying 'We should never make assumptions", or "We should always assume rather than communicate." But in reality they pretty much agree that we should both learn to communicate better and to accurately read social cues.
@MarceloAbans
@MarceloAbans 3 жыл бұрын
Fucking bingo!
@demolazer
@demolazer Жыл бұрын
How in the name of god is 'if you invite someone back to your place they will assume sex is happening' a controversial take? That's important for young people starting out dating to be clear about. They will read this insane discourse and put themselves at more risk.
@michaeldromes3948
@michaeldromes3948 3 жыл бұрын
There should be a speedrun timer for these twitter reactionaries debates, cuz they always end up the same lmao. Reading the "controversial" tweet in its entirety, walking them through it sentence by sentece, reactionary taking back their heated replies, pushing back on some of Destiny's rhetoric and ultimately agreeing with the take they've malded over the last 24-48 hours.
@RoseEyed
@RoseEyed 3 жыл бұрын
As a woman with high functioning social anxiety I prefer explicit verbal over non-verbal cues. We're in a transitionary period. We didn't talk much about consent or assault before outside of VERY obvious situations. Now that that conversation is broadening, it will take time to establish best practices. (One reason I prefer direct communication.) Because of how sensitive the topic is I see the disconnect. It's similar to ones about the friendzone, dating someone much older, or if you should be expected to have sex if someone paid for dinner. How people interpret what you say is influenced by their personal experiences--especially when gender is involved. The original statement "don't invite someone over your house unless you're comfortable having sex with them" can imply "since you invited them over now you're EXPECTED to have sex with them and if you don't you're a tease." That's obviously not the intent, but if someone's had a negative experience like that, they may jump to that uncharitable interpretation. I also think both had valid points. We should be striving to avoid miscommunications by lessening our assumptions while ALSO acknowledging the current world. So, yes these are nonverbal cues someone may interpret as a sexual advance. Look out for them if you're on the receiving end and be careful not to do them if you don't mean to. AND. If you think you're getting these cues, ask to make sure you're not misinterpreting them.
@toomuchmidi
@toomuchmidi 3 жыл бұрын
Do you love black people?
@fitnessfunk1710
@fitnessfunk1710 3 жыл бұрын
Just answer the question
@traumatisedcommentary9177
@traumatisedcommentary9177 3 жыл бұрын
Never
@toomuchmidi
@toomuchmidi 3 жыл бұрын
DO you LOVE black people??
@hoominbeeing
@hoominbeeing 3 жыл бұрын
Doo u luh bla peepo?
@CODELIRIOUS-sy8xz
@CODELIRIOUS-sy8xz 3 жыл бұрын
@@toomuchmidi Do you like all black people?...!!!
@illhaveanother8173
@illhaveanother8173 9 ай бұрын
It's odd to find out not inviting strangers to your house isn't the norm everywhere. Certainly not how it goes in New England. No reason for us to be in each other's business that deep right away.
@hermithouse
@hermithouse 3 жыл бұрын
While I am openly critical of Destiny’s takes on lefties, he is absolutely correct about this one. Since it is impossible to fully know someone’s intent, then the assumption should be based on reality and not hopes and dreams. If you are on a date and they invite you home afterwords, the implication is sex. Otherwise you have just made a possibly awkward goodbye that much more awkward by making it goodbye and please leave my house. Destiny is absolutely correct that unless they have had a clear and open conversation of expectations and what may happen, it is setting people up for lots of problems. Where I do disagree with Destiny is the attacks he’s faced are because of lefty wokeness. Maybe In that one specific instance that was the case, but I think it is just the fact the internet is a toxic dump full of idiots that is the bigger problem. Comment about literally anything at any time and you are likely to have people jump in to argue and fight and call you stupid for thinking X. The other day I commented on a boardgame I liked and people were responding about how wrong I was and the game is garbage, etc. People have this idea that if they can shit on something or someone it means they are better or smarter. It’s an ego-driven bully tactic the internet has normalized and standardized and it fucking sucks and helps nobody and contributes nothing. But it seems to be 90% of internet “engagement” these days.
@RueRyuzaki6
@RueRyuzaki6 3 жыл бұрын
BASED
@feliz2564
@feliz2564 3 жыл бұрын
And it makes sense to because where does sex most often take place? In someone's house in the bedroom. So of course if you invite someone into their house after a date it makes sense as to why they would think sex is going to happen because it normally happens their. If you wanted to just hang out more you could've gone to any other place and done it, or if you are going to your house, then make it clear sex isn't going to happen because you're not into doing that.🤷🏼‍♂️ That's how I see it.
@KurokamiNajimi
@KurokamiNajimi 3 жыл бұрын
To be fair smarter people do tend to have more credible takes :3
@keithfilibeck2390
@keithfilibeck2390 3 жыл бұрын
Destiny is playing The Last Spell wrong, needs to re-evaluate what he's doing here, these hero's should ALL have a second weapon.
@LiteralGibberish
@LiteralGibberish 3 жыл бұрын
Sounds like he needs you in dgg chat
@Green-tf8uw
@Green-tf8uw 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah you are the only one who cares about the game
@keithfilibeck2390
@keithfilibeck2390 3 жыл бұрын
@@Green-tf8uw I bet Destiny cared more about the game than this pointless conversation.
@Green-tf8uw
@Green-tf8uw 3 жыл бұрын
@@keithfilibeck2390 I don't blame him, this woman was every dishonest tweeter user in a nutshell.
@justlooking1087
@justlooking1087 3 жыл бұрын
It depends on the guy, I've invited girls I've liked over just to chill before. Some women just like to come over and drink a cup of wine and watch some movies when you're first getting to know each other. Then again, I'm the type of guy that looks for girlfriends as opposed to girls to just smash. I know that most guys think how Destiny described it though. Women should make it clear that that's not what they're planning to do if they agree to go over a guy's house. Otherwise, most men will assume that they're dtf.
@Gearsturfs
@Gearsturfs 3 жыл бұрын
We could try and be clear but that can be incredibly uncomfortable Hey bb inviting you over to bone that’s chill right
@ubaidbutt9709
@ubaidbutt9709 Жыл бұрын
OK but just because a guy assumed that she wanted to have sex, he shouldn't force her to have sex with him. We should always get an explicit and implicit yes before getting laid with someone
@KitLecleir
@KitLecleir 3 жыл бұрын
I don't get why everyone is misquoting the post like destiny does at 1:42 It wasn't "Invited over after the date" It was "invited over for the second date" It changes the implications. Inviting someone in after a date is a pretty clear sign. Inviting someone over *for* a date is not so clear a sign. There are ways to clear that up over the course of the date but c'mon. Let's not act like it's an all-access pass to the bone zone.
@davidcampos8032
@davidcampos8032 3 жыл бұрын
No one said it’s it’s an all access pass to bone zone, arguing against no one at all. It’s about safety and not putting yourself in a sketchy situation where expectations can be misaligned between the two people
@mechanomics2649
@mechanomics2649 3 жыл бұрын
I'm not sure how this really changes the implication. It's not an "all-access pass to the bone zone". That isn't the argument being put forward. It's that inviting someone over after a date generally implies sex. This isn't a new concept by any means.
@modal9th234
@modal9th234 3 жыл бұрын
Wait, who acts like an invite for a date equals consent to anything? It's just a sign and the people inviting should be aware of that expectation. Doesn't mean they have to have sex with every person they invite for a date. You understand you're derailing the conversation to rape exactly how Destiny was saying, right?
@takeshii
@takeshii 3 жыл бұрын
why the fuck would a woman invite a man to her house unless she was comfortable enough with him to have sex with him? for a date or after a date, it changes nothing about what destiny says. Both end up with a practical stranger being in your house now he knows where you live.
@Desdress
@Desdress 3 жыл бұрын
The advice is the same: "Dont invite someone u do not want to have sex with to ur home as a date." U are trying to muddy the water. To complicate the situation and add some more conditions and make it look like someone is trying to bypass consent. But its very simple: "Dont invite someone u do not want to have sex with to ur home as a date." It goes for first dates, second dates, after-dates, every type of date there is... And nobody said that once u get invited to someones home its a bone-time. Its just poeple like u again tryin to frame it as some rape culture.
@bigmac.3561
@bigmac.3561 3 жыл бұрын
This was not a debate- it was a lecture by destiny on reality
@basedcentrist3056
@basedcentrist3056 3 жыл бұрын
I instantly understood the tweet. Who are these people that need this so painstakingly spelled out for them? Are they just so fucking inept at life that they need their hand held at every single point in life? Holy shit
@lach10211
@lach10211 3 жыл бұрын
Saying you shouldn't leave a wallet in your car vs you deserve to have younwallet stolen of you do so.
@Exystence
@Exystence 3 жыл бұрын
3:30 "It's impossible to tell, best bet is to keep your wits about you and continue looking for signs"
@bobxbaker
@bobxbaker 2 жыл бұрын
well there is the uncertain relationships where it haven't been established if he or she is just a friend and by inviting them over it is an implied sexual invitation. and it is that unless there are words establishing that there's nothing that's gonna happen which can't be misconstrued to be flirtatious or playing hard to get. where it actually is more troublesome is when you're already established to be just friends, or you have friends that are friends with them and you're just hanging around each other just being friendly then it's implied you're just friendly until one or the other reaches to try and be more than that. for example if a friend of a friend asks you to come over and hang, it's a tricky situation because they might want to spring a sexual invitation on you, but you can't assume it's gonna be that. it could just be that they wanted to be closer as a friend with you. or if you're already friends then coming to hangout is just gonna be the assumption that you're going there to hangout and nothing else. so how do you try to cross the border between just being a friendly face to "i want to fuck you" when you're in that position without coming on too strong and or not getting it across at all and ending up doing something really fucking stupid like inviting someone over and flirt but the signal wasn't received and you couldn't tell so you try to lean in for the kiss and you get rejected and now both are feeling fucking awkward as fuck about it, and this is just a mild case of stupidity. now i think there are 2 ways you can reach across and try to convey that shit, either you are being very blunt and say what you want. or you lead them in and try to feel it out to see how they react to several small instances of distance closing things you do.
@TheRexTera
@TheRexTera 3 жыл бұрын
The thing that screws up consent so much is that the whole "maybe game" is so exiting. The uncertainty is the thing that turns us on. It also suppose to be hard to rout out those of us with neuro-diversity or lack of social intelligence from the gene-pool. It sucks, but that's the way it is.
@SamuelRyanLilly
@SamuelRyanLilly 3 жыл бұрын
Generally speaking, I think it's best to bring up both things together rather than just promoting one or the other. Having someone come to your place or going to someone's place, in terms of dating, you personally shouldn't expect that to mean sex is going to be involved. However, you should also realize that most people will think that expectation is implied. Both of these are good advice that won't detract from the conversation while also helping to move us closer to the way we'd like the dating culture to be in the future. Anyone just getting one half of that advice isn't working with optimal advice.
@Skinnymarks
@Skinnymarks 3 жыл бұрын
I think its better to say that inviting someone over in a date context shouldn't mean that sex will be followed through- but that it should be assumed that sex is a considered potential for both parties.
@feliz2564
@feliz2564 3 жыл бұрын
@@Skinnymarks I think that stance is a better one
@SamuelRyanLilly
@SamuelRyanLilly 3 жыл бұрын
@@Skinnymarks Yeah, that's basically what I'm saying without the extra details and explanations as to why... and probably worded better in terms of giving advice. As long as both parts are being addressed.
@riordanbrown9557
@riordanbrown9557 3 жыл бұрын
@@SamuelRyanLilly Knowing the implication (going over means the possibility of sex exists) while both parties feeling comfortable using communicating how far they're willing to go with the other respecting that boundary is how I assume things work at this point
@Holobrine
@Holobrine 3 жыл бұрын
That initial tweet only makes sense if you’re inviting them home from a certain kind of date. But I should still say, Women: it’s understandable if a guy expects sex after you invite him home on a date and is disappointed when you actually don’t. Men: It’s okay if she invites you home and it turns out she doesn’t want sex. If she says no when push comes to shove, she says no.
@Sprite_525
@Sprite_525 3 жыл бұрын
Destiny definitely found ‘sea-lioning”on urban dictionary that day lol 😆
@bajsmongo2000
@bajsmongo2000 3 жыл бұрын
i once met a girl at a bar whom i danced with and had some drinks with, she then invited me home to her place after the bar closed and i thought "hell yea" and we ended up just watching dubbed anime (red flag right there, subbed or nothing) and her rejecting any hint or advance i made for anything sexual.. i then found out she have aspergers so.. i'm pretty sure ppl on the spectrum dont understand the underlying expectations of invting someone into your bedroom at night after drinks lol.
@legin777
@legin777 3 жыл бұрын
1:20 "What does your house have that no where else you can get?" *me: Tacos "Exactly right! First try, it's privacy." *me:.... Man, I am terminally dumb sometimes.....
@Caminacels
@Caminacels 3 жыл бұрын
I'd say Destiny underestimates cultural differences even between Western countries. The central role dates and all of the related rituals play in the US just doesn't exist in any of the European countries I've lived in. Like, at all.
@Caminacels
@Caminacels 3 жыл бұрын
@@godscroissant1539 Germany and Spain.
@emmanueliannacci9426
@emmanueliannacci9426 3 жыл бұрын
All of this is good and all... What game is he playing. Looks awesome!
@SpaceOddity174
@SpaceOddity174 3 жыл бұрын
Was also curious and found out its called "The Last Spell" on steam
@eturnity
@eturnity 3 жыл бұрын
@@SpaceOddity174 thank you
@flamingo3478
@flamingo3478 3 жыл бұрын
What’s his twitter ?
@mathewburr2126
@mathewburr2126 3 жыл бұрын
But wouldn’t that just be morally neutral 🤔
@derpmansderpyskin
@derpmansderpyskin 3 жыл бұрын
Well if they didn't do it, someone else would've, so of course it would be morally neutral.
@danielschetrompf1861
@danielschetrompf1861 3 жыл бұрын
16:57 this is an amazing speech
@lockelamora4184
@lockelamora4184 3 жыл бұрын
Dating is pretty easy from my perspective. The hard part is overcoming all the insecurities you have while being mentally stable enough to deal with your partners. Eye contact, make them laugh, ask them to go on a walk, become more comfortable, etc.. works for me. But I never try anymore. Just another emotional nuke waiting to happen LOL. Also... body language and actually knowing when a girl is into you is huge.. maybe that's where people have issues..? I mean if you're obese or give off a tone of "I'm a rude asshole", probably need to fix that first, or lower your standards and do the best you can and be happy with yourself, then it'll be easier, no one wants a negative asshat, so if you have some sort of disability, knowing how to navigate that and use it to your advantage is also huge, like im a stuttery stupid mess irl, but I can play with that to make people laugh, overcoming something for someone else is a nice gesture. I feel like people are focusing on how people react to their behaviour because that's easier then fixing their own, which is kinda scary. Also dating strangers without any sort of precontext of a shared interest or at least talking to each other to feel each other out is sus.. the only use I see of tinder is like... location based matching so if you're talking to a girl at work that's an easy way in. Buuut, fuck those random stranger matches, imo.
@andersmeisner1642
@andersmeisner1642 3 жыл бұрын
I agree. I’ve never had much trouble neither, and I’m a 5’7 lad of average build and looks. Mentality is quite a part of the whole thing.
@PuertoRicanGrinderX
@PuertoRicanGrinderX Жыл бұрын
Some behavior is unfixable like being autistic.
@permets2apollox453
@permets2apollox453 Жыл бұрын
@@PuertoRicanGrinderX not really. I know lots of autists that do just time. Hell, that's me
@PuertoRicanGrinderX
@PuertoRicanGrinderX Жыл бұрын
@@permets2apollox453 That's anecdotal, statistically autists are heavily disadvantaged, my anecdote being my friend who is autistic is very unstable and incapable of maintaining friendships which is sad to say
@soleo2783
@soleo2783 Жыл бұрын
​@@PuertoRicanGrinderXSpeaking as an autist, you can fix your behavior even if you are autistic, social skills are still a skill, and therefore you can get better at it.
@Gir101Evil
@Gir101Evil 3 жыл бұрын
"well i never even wanted to argue with that point so there" the ultimate pivot out of the entire debate lmao
@masternoob9673
@masternoob9673 3 жыл бұрын
I agree with most of this. The problem is that people only give advice based on biased opinions about certain topics, not actual facts. Because in the end it’s easier to blame someone who isn’t part of the game rather than the player who fucked up at their job
@mastakilla7317
@mastakilla7317 3 жыл бұрын
this "hypothetical" is extremly common lol
@sathrielsatanson666
@sathrielsatanson666 3 жыл бұрын
Destiny on Twitter again? Let's see how long it will last this time :D
@TNTspaz
@TNTspaz 3 жыл бұрын
I think Destiny sometimes forget the types of people he associates with. These aren't normal peoples. These are people whose entire identity revolves around getting upset over basic stuff.
@SoldierGeneral64
@SoldierGeneral64 3 жыл бұрын
I agree with Destiny, but at the same time let's be real. Even within the context of dating in Reddit are you going to tell me the "backlash", however much it actually equates too, is unexpected? Just as there are assumptions/expectations when going home with a guy after a date there are assumptions/expectations of how parts of the online community will react when a comment doesn't add certain disclaimers or caveats. Given your audience, you ain't a dedicated MRA channel lol, so no additional assurances should be needed as audience knows your stance. Obviously the fear is certain toxic individuals will use it as reinforcement of their beliefs. The thing is such people probably aren't going to be "encouraged" by such a neutral tweet and if they do perhaps they will look at Destiny's content that is against incels. Additionally it is ironic people against the tweet are outraged at the idea of assuming a guy will have some form of sexual interaction when going home with date, but at the same time are assuming Destiny was making a stance on whether the assumption is fine or about silence somehow automatically means consent. People like to strawman. and
@thesummaryguy3911
@thesummaryguy3911 3 жыл бұрын
avoid the internet for dating advice. Be kind, but dont be a simp. Ok i said that on the internet but still I'm trying to make the world a better place
@OmegaMajic
@OmegaMajic 3 жыл бұрын
To be fair they are not only creating incels AND subjecting people into eternal celebicy
@umangmalik
@umangmalik 3 жыл бұрын
i love the destiny self help advice arc
@123612100
@123612100 3 жыл бұрын
Simple fix, women should always make the first move or if you're on a gay date the bottom makes the first move or if your both switch either one can make the first move.
@robertterrell7057
@robertterrell7057 3 жыл бұрын
I pretty sure he meant just post a date or someone your emotionally invested in. and not that u cant invite anyone who u could be romantically interested in. I wish his initial tweet was so easily to quote and roast
@keggerous
@keggerous 3 жыл бұрын
Why do some women feel like the burden of correcting any misunderstanding about whether sex is happening or not, is always on the man? Why is it ALWAYS on us to ensure that there are no incongruences between expectation and reality?
@sadboipotato3382
@sadboipotato3382 3 жыл бұрын
Especially since they expect us to be the ones to make the first move. Or keep her interested, or make plans for dates and whatnot. All while making sure shes OK with it telepathically because she won't open her mouth and say something. This shit is why I started focusing on myself and my goals first above all else. If I find someone, cool. If not, oh well.
@kennybowens4983
@kennybowens4983 3 жыл бұрын
This is his wheel house he needs more of these conversations
@Lewa500
@Lewa500 3 жыл бұрын
01:34 -- I also expect (angry) sex whenever I invite someone after a debate.
@the-renegade
@the-renegade 3 жыл бұрын
Early in the morning, let's go.
@Inressa
@Inressa 3 жыл бұрын
Didn't sleep last night so now I have some content :)
@kyriedacrybaby1938
@kyriedacrybaby1938 3 жыл бұрын
I think it was crazy that Iron Mike Tyson was not only charged with rape but was given a 5 yr prison sentence (paroled after 3.5 years) for having sex with beauty queen/model. What did she think they were going to do when she came to his hotel room at 3am & greeted Mike with passionate kiss she admitted to being the one that initiated the Kiss & after Mike asked do you want to come in & she responded by saying “I’ve been waiting for this all week.” How was Mike supposed to interpret her actions in addition she never withdrew consent. It was one of the worst cases of pre-judging a person based on false accusations by his opportunist 1st wife Robin Givens who ambushed him in interviews with Barbara Walters saying Mike had beat, choked, & was verbally/physically abusive despite him never doing anything to the miner (aka gold digger), with #metoo being everywhere I think all available evidence shows he has never abused any of his wife’s or GF’s. If I’m wrong I really want someone to explain how so & provide evidence. To be clear I’m not a rape apologist but I am against throwing black men in jail for something they didn’t do but bc he’s a “big scary black man” so he must be guilty which was worse in the 90’s then today. Iron Mike is a role model for MH, philanthropy, & self improvement. #expungeMikesRecord
@mazdaroadster-mx5
@mazdaroadster-mx5 3 жыл бұрын
1:47 after a debate lol
@alphariusomegon4442
@alphariusomegon4442 2 жыл бұрын
Name something your house has that not many other people do, a bidet
@Saethiaal666
@Saethiaal666 3 жыл бұрын
That girl was nice however that Xavier guy he was talking about on twitter might be the literal definition of cringe lmao
@drwalka10
@drwalka10 3 жыл бұрын
She was coming in bad faith tho.
@que08
@que08 3 жыл бұрын
It's easy to get expectations wrong if not discussed beforehand. Sometimes women/men think that they are just getting to know each other better in a more comfortable setting without the idea of sex. I'm assuming that most people understand that you are not inviting total strangers to your house, but rather people that you may have known for awhile, however this it is still a risk for both people if you don't know them well enough. Inviting people to your house is a huge level of trust and should be treated with caution. I think, people need to make it VERY clear what they are being invited for.
@ubaidbutt9709
@ubaidbutt9709 Жыл бұрын
OK, I don't get this stranger vs known person argument. Rape statistics show that women are mostly raped by men they already knew. It's like you can't really trust anyone. Even your husband can coerce you into having sex with him.
@commentersrule
@commentersrule 3 жыл бұрын
Thank for the video, hope the tiktok gets unbanned
@Shlippies
@Shlippies 3 жыл бұрын
His tik tok got banned already?
@commentersrule
@commentersrule 3 жыл бұрын
@@Shlippies Yep, probably from mass reporting
@Skinnymarks
@Skinnymarks 3 жыл бұрын
My Responce to the first tweet is that yes expect sex- but always always always give an out. That makes it so much easier to want to have sex while in that situation.
@officialmistel
@officialmistel 3 жыл бұрын
I wish I had known all of this before being physically hurt twice by two different men, who invited me over to their place on first or second “casual just hanging out” date. It’s reprehensible, that men don’t realize that the line between “being in control of situation” and “forcing someone and punishing for not complying” is so thin :(
@wyleecoyotee4252
@wyleecoyotee4252 2 жыл бұрын
@lloyd99984 'Potential intentions ' is just that. Masking is so common place like movie, hanging out etc is just another word when truth doesn't want to be told
@ViolentSmoker
@ViolentSmoker 3 жыл бұрын
When you've learned human interaction from Seinfeld.
@mikecurry6847
@mikecurry6847 3 жыл бұрын
I wonder if this could have been avoided if he just made it clear from the beginning that he wasn't making a prescriptive claim. That does seem to be where a lot of the criticisms seem rooted. If someone thinks that destiny is saying things _should_ be this way then they can argue that point I guess. But it seems like destiny is actually just saying that this is the way things are right now so be safe and don't invite strangers into your house. This is why Twitter is really bad for serious topics imo. Social media in general tends to bring out the worst in people when discussing hot button issues. But Twitter is a special kind of fucked up.
@KayefX
@KayefX 3 жыл бұрын
This is so easy. Regardless of whether or not they invite you over for innocent reasons, just flirt with them and see where it goes. If they consent, it really doesn't matter why you showed up.
@IvanTheLeiwand
@IvanTheLeiwand 3 жыл бұрын
I completely disagree with Steven here. Taking someone back to your place can be nice for just relaxing, maybe talking about personal topics that you're uncomfortable discussing in public, maybe showing them your place, showing them your epic pokemon card collection - I feel like there are a million really really nice things you can do with a date at your place that dont have to be sex. I mean, ofc, if its a tinder date you're probably just waiting to get laid. But otherwise I disagree.
@gleba080
@gleba080 3 жыл бұрын
The original discussion was strictly after the (2nd) date. How could this be in any other context? Of course you can invite someone and not have sex with them. But you should be aware that every guy would see that as a invitation for sex and pretending they wouldn't is just dumb.
@ogolthorp
@ogolthorp 3 жыл бұрын
It doesn’t mean you HAVE to have sex. But a huge majority of the dating world will see an invite to your place as there being a good potential for sex happening that night. And when it doesn’t happen, they’ll likely feel like they did/said something that made you change your mind about it. And if you want to continue to disagree with this, it just means you’ll be sending mixed signals to every date you invite back to your place. It’s just how a majority of people view dating.
@IvanTheLeiwand
@IvanTheLeiwand 3 жыл бұрын
@@gleba080 ​ @ogolthorp How can I invite somebody over without implying that I wanna fuck them? Only by explicitly stating that?
@ANunes06
@ANunes06 3 жыл бұрын
That statement being true doesn't contradict the following advice: If you invite somebody over to your house after a date and end up showing them your pokemon cards, don't be shocked if there isn't a next date, and if somebody invites you over to *their* house after a date, don't assume they're planning on showing you their pokemon cards. You CAN also take somebody back to your place to murder them. It's not about what CAN happen, but what are reasonable things to assume about certain behaviors and signals, especially when dating.
@harold926
@harold926 3 жыл бұрын
@@IvanTheLeiwand yeah it can be really that simple, what is the reason you want someone over to your house specifically instead of going to another bar or club or whatever? Lets take the playing videogame meme example that was shown in at the start or lets say you really want to watch a specific movie together, just say hey do you want to come to my place and play some mario party or hey i really like x movie do you want to watch it together at my place and even then if you then think the other person is expecting more just say its JUST playing video games or i ONLY want to watch this movie for this evening.
@justintyler4814
@justintyler4814 3 жыл бұрын
People like this seem to want the world to perfectly confirm to them personally. And then when they find out that they are not only wrong in their initial sentiment they are also aligned more ideally with their opponent instead of letting it go and just taking an L and growing they usually try to Pivot like yes I agree I still think we can make this a productive conversation. Which translates to I agree but i need to save face and have a point where I'm going to look favorable.
@amirjammal1157
@amirjammal1157 3 жыл бұрын
Yo what game is he playing here it looks sick as hell
@Absolukely
@Absolukely 3 жыл бұрын
I believe it is called the last spell
@HomemadeCoconuts
@HomemadeCoconuts 3 жыл бұрын
The last spell, its a tactics roguelite
@henrikfallman590
@henrikfallman590 3 жыл бұрын
store.steampowered.com/app/1105670/The_Last_Spell/ Early acces so the content meh its just the 1 map atm but its fun.
@Slevencolevra
@Slevencolevra Жыл бұрын
I don't agree with a lot of destiny takes. He is on the money here though. Big Facts
@travisalexphoto
@travisalexphoto 3 жыл бұрын
I'm in an ENM relationship and was Poly for years. In these dynamics, you're actively seeking play partners, or secondaries to engage in sexual activities with through dating apps. In the 13 years I've been engaging in this in my life, it is well known and established that if you are inviting somebody into your private home, where they know your address, after meeting them for a date or a couple of dates, that is an indication that they trust you, and sexy shit is about to happen. I can literally only think of two scenarios in those 13 years where that wasn't the case, and they were very extreme cases, where that was talked about way beforehand.
@travisalexphoto
@travisalexphoto 3 жыл бұрын
Oh, and just as an added note, anybody who actually lives the polyamorous and ethical non-monogamy route, fucking hates Merrick and SDL, because they have absolutely no fucking idea what they're talking about when it comes to dating and sex. Everybody in that circle continues to talk shit about them from an online social perspective. They are a laughing stock.
@zayzaber5905
@zayzaber5905 3 жыл бұрын
Yooo whats the game he's playing it looks familiar but I don't remember the name lmao
@Xaedroth
@Xaedroth 3 жыл бұрын
This discussion is, more than anything, proof of Destiny's issue with the discussion around consent going too far. People on the internet are so fucking obsessed with having the next 'hot take' on a given topic that no discussion is ever allowed to settle, we must push and push to progress for the sake of progress. Can't see that having any issues at all.
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