You Get a Million Dollars BUT... - SimplyPodLogical

On this episode of SimplyPodLogical, Cristine and Ben play ‘Get a Million dollars but...’ and discuss hypothetical scenarios they would entertain in exchange for millions of dollars.
0:00 - Hey what’s up holo everyone
0:46 - Ben has a fever
2:17 - You get a million dollars but a snail is trying to kill you
3:32 - What is a million dollars
13:50 - Five million dollars but you can only eat meat
16:10 - Eat only hummus tangent
18:12 - You get a million dollars but you have to move to another continent
22:51 - You get a million dollars but choose a person to die
28:05 - You get a million dollars but you have spend it
28:39 - Spend a million dollars this weekend on www.holotaco.com
35:44 - You get 5 million dollars but can never paint your nails again
36:51 - You get 5 million dollars but you have to stay in the same room for a year
43:30 - You get a million dollars but so does your least favourite person
45:35 - You get 10 million dollars but all your movements are inverted
47:51 - You get 5 million dollars but you can never get on a moving vehicle
51:17 - You get a million dollars but you can’t access it until you’re 65
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©Simply Nailogical Inc. All opinions are our own.

[@meghannsherman]

I think Cristine would break anyone trying to interrogate her. 😂

[@mrnmnr06]

😂

[@stargzr]

I love how Christine makes every question so unnecessarily complicated

[@gumshake689]

its a little exhausting

[@nailsarelife]

That's kind of the point of a podcast. Sometimes, it's entertaining. Other times, it's boring. It just depends on the subject and how much extra 💩 your brain enjoys. 😂😂

[@SimplyNotLogical]

overthinking holo how are ya

[@kvbmastahchef]

It's the Libra in her

[@borkdogey]

@@gumshake689 tbh it’s more funny than anything 😭😭

[@cateheart7565]

I always thought the snail question was how life is anyways. Death is following you and you don't know when/how long you have! Take the money 😂

[@Ariplaygames]

@@interwaveswatcher1576 I mean maybe not in the version they are discussing but I've always heard it as "the snail is unstopabble and undestructible". Meaning you cant really trap it anywhere cause it will always find a way to go towards you (granted, at a snails pace) and you cant kill it or destroy it at all. I would totally take the money tho lol

[@moof4427]

why not just trap the snail? im assuming its not a ghost so if you like lock it in a safe or something then youre fine?

[@anafitzgeraldariza1041]

It was so cute when Ben just said "I like you" at the end of the episode it always gets to me how affectionate he is with his words.

[@JokesInBase13]

I mean, as little as $50k would allow me to completely fix EVERY problem I have, but nothing less than $10 million is a retirement amount comfortable enough to deal with a killer snail chasing me for the rest of my life.

[@cambriadean]

There’s like a million snails outside my apartment at all times lol the paranoia I would have

[@samanthasutherland8195]

I am amazed at Cristine’s brain and how she’s able to find a loophole in every question😂

[@alenunya]

A true business lady

[@lovely.and.lacquered]

I totally agree about the million dollars thing! My husband and I have talked about it before too. It's still a lot of money, BUT it's not "quit your job and retire" money anymore. Most people can't retire on $1,000,000 which is crazy, but true. If someone gave me a free million dollars, I'd be able to pay off my condo mortgage and student loans, maybe do a few things around the condo, but the rest would probably just end up in investment accounts so that I *can* retire at 65 without worrying! So I completely get what you're saying. Still a lot of money, but it doesn't go nearly as far as it used to.

[@EmmanuelleBeaudoinRoy]

I feel like it used to be an unfathomable amount of money. Now it doesnt even buy a house in the city I live in 🥲

[@lovely.and.lacquered]

@@EmmanuelleBeaudoinRoy Same! I'm totally with you! It's depressing to think that a million used to be plenty to retire on and now for most people that's not the case anymore!

[@cyjayjay]

This whole snail conversation sent me🤣

[@SimplyNotLogical]

simplysnailogical

[@shaadfncjl92]

Guys, chill out. Cristine was very careful with her words. She did not mean that 1 million is not that much, just that it is not as much as it used to be. She acknowledged that 1 million could still get you far. Why must you attack? (edit spelling)

[@jesslikescoffee24]

I’m nowhere close to wealthy and I recognize that 1m is not that much, and that’s partially because I live in a similarly expensive area in Canada as Cristine and Ben. Within certain context, a million doesn’t buy a house in the areas we live in, which makes it feel particularly “not that much.” But in other areas of the world, a million could probably buy ten houses, and therefore it’s worth a whole lot! Context matters a lot.

[@kianna270]

Which is TRUE. Nowadays, normal houses are 1million and is around the the amount you would want to retire comfortably- without having to work or subsidize your costs. So she’s RIGHT. Plus they’re very clearly stating their bias here, i don’t see how that’s so wrong.

[@mecchamouse5535]

Wait, some people are mad about that? 😴 If so, those types of people should be ignored because they have so many "outrages" scheduled throughout the day they have to get to anyway.

[@AllTheArtsy]

If life expectancy is like to 75, and you retire at 60, 1m probably isnt even enough to retire comfortably. It really is not that much

[@lucyparra2119]

Agreed. Hearing the first example I was thinking “1 mili is not enough for that shi lol”

[@zaitesushion]

Beynnn: *flirts* Simply: "... everyone, he's unwell" 😂😂

[@CaityRaindrop]

I love that Cristine goes to creating snail tracking software where I'm just like, k so I'll do a ring of salt around me. It said I can't kill it but if it walks into salt it killed itself, maybe I just love seasoning

[@leahbelieva]

Nah. Find the snail. Do a ring of salt a round the snail. Go on about your life!

[@baileescott401]

Michael from VSauce did a Mind Field episode on Isolation, he was monitored while isolated in a nearly empty room for days. You guys should watch that, his experience is pretty interesting. Ben, you might not know some consequences of isolation. You gradually lose to ability to keep track of what's happening. Eventually memory becomes unreliable to where you don't remember what you've done since you've woken up, or how many hours have passed. I've read a lot about solitary confinement, and it really is inhumane to the core. The practice of solitary confinement comes directly from the Quakers btw. It was believed locking someone alone in a room for long enough fixed their behavior. In reality it's mental torment that makes you beg for mercy.

[@LadyShiver]

If you want to see another interesting video about it "Into the Shadows" made a video about "white torture" here on KZbin. It's about 15 minutes long or so. He talks about how solitary confinement is being used as a form of torture.

[@Le_Cube]

I enjoy these topics where they talk about stuff relatable or not. We as viewers are aware that they are rich, and they see things differently from lowered income people. Let them talk about money, who cares. From what we know para-socially of Cristine, she’s aware and grateful of her success and we know she’s not being malicious. What’s gonna end up happening is that she’s going to stop sharing anything with the viewers. Because we are annoying. 😂

[@lovely.and.lacquered]

100% agree!

[@YandereDay]

Its also not like they've been this wealthy since they were born. Plus they are pretty charitable and also careful with their money. Not all influencers can say the same, so its just really nice that they're so transparent from the audience perspective, and makes them much more relatable

[@YandereDay]

@@elainerose8799 its not bad to be wealthy, its only bad when wealthy people act like they have no privilege. Which isn't even so bad for private people, but influencers can come across tone deaf - for example Shane dawson acting like he's poor while living in a literal mansion (before all the controversies at least)

[@mecchamouse5535]

Yeah, honestly I can't tell if some of the active commenters are just honestly sensitive about these things, or if they actually want to make creators self-conscious as a way of exerting control. Glad comments like this balance things out.

[@mrnmnr06]

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@enenenergp]

Michael from Vsauce did a KZbin red series back in the day and intended to spend I think 3 days in solitary confinement but in a very clean safe environment and like well fed and all that. And it did look pretty concerning, he didn’t seem to know if he was dreaming or awake. It’s not safe or easy. I can’t remember if he finished it or if they cut it short.

[@sarumatsu3698]

He finished it,, but he misjudged how long it had been,, and he was (thankfully) fine..

[@baby404]

this video is all i could think of when Ben was saying how easy he thinks it would be. It would be a waking nightmare.. I definitely hope Ben checks out Vsauces video!!

[@baby404]

The series is called Isolation - Mine Field for anyone interested

[@is_just_diana]

I love how pretty Simply's hair looks :D

[@themustar601]

You could crowdsource tracking the snail for free (you can’t tell me that Chat wouldn’t be all over telling Cristine where the snail is at all times). Or use the $100,000 a year to get the snail captured and transported back to the other side of the world away from you whenever it gets close. Or give a lot of the money to Elon and send the snail into space. Or live in the middle of the salt flats where all it can do is circle around you forever. Either way I’d take the five mil and get two homes, one on either side of the planet. People do that all the time anyway even without a snail.

[@lestranged]

a moat filled with salt

[@wyattwilliams7904]

“If there was only a 5 dollar ticket for speeding I’d be driving 200 fucking miles through a school zone” Beyn no 🥺🤣

[@MrJannieta]

Ben: I couldn't live on a diet of meat for a year. Also Ben: year of solitary confinement? No problemo, sign me up! 😂😂

[@BekaLei]

Plot twist: the people managing the solitary confinement place only feed you meat

[@BekaLei]

Second plot twist: they let the snail into the room

[@master_loli]

because he needs hummus

[@miribmakesitbetter5269]

Here's the thing about the vision/movement switch. They've done experiments with glasses that mess with people's vision and the brain accomodates quite quickly. I bet even if you went back and forth it would learn to handle both and only take a few seconds to figure out which it had at the moment. So I would *totally* take that deal.

[@carinen8119]

Yes! Our brains are fascinating

[@nameifox4510]

I have never been this early, but I just wanted to say that I'm writing my bachelor thesis in sociology right now so I hope the Mother of Holo will send me her wisdom so I make it to the other side.

[@hapsate]

Good luck Namei Fox!

[@SimplyNotLogical]

the sociological discourse of ~nail polish~

[@nameifox4510]

@@SimplyNotLogical Haha, I wish I was writing about that! :D Love you, simply! ❤️

[@jamiegautreaux8147]

It says you can kill the snail but it never says you can't trap it😂. Hire someone to build a cement box with a bullet proof glass to put the snail in and then hire someone to keep it in their home to watch.

[@hologram4118]

Ben is out of his mind. He couldn’t last a month in solitary confinement. VSauce did it for 3 days and started becoming depressed

[@wendydh1212]

Everyone’s need for social interaction are so different though. I’m naturally hermit-like and I’m fine not interacting with anyone for a long period of time. It would be easier for someone like me to do solitary confinement than someone who is extroverted.

[@leahbelieva]

@@wendydh1212but it’s not just lack of human communication. It’s lack of any social/mental engagement at all. Even hermits have plenty of tasks to do and their environment to interact with. While I’m sure many could make it past three days, I would venture to guess the vast majority of people wouldn’t make it a week.

[@wendydh1212]

@@leahbelieva I'm sure most people can't do it, but it doesn't mean there are people out there who can.

[@hologram4118]

@@wendydh1212 were social animals. idc how much of an introvert you are. you need stimulation of some kind, or your mind starts doing it for you. aka you go crazy.

[@wendydh1212]

@@hologram4118 Yes, we generally are, but to think that there aren't people who are mentally capable of doing a month is underestimating what we can do as well.

[@Dgootee]

Finally looked in the background of the podcast to see the new collection box 😂

[@AlearaJL]

Me too! 🎉

[@polianarchy]

🏖️🏖️🏖️

[@mmjoness]

13:07 Ben and Christine forgetting about apple AirTags 😂

[@lilfishboy253]

41:23 Never would I everrrrr confine myself to a room for a month let alone a year. I have personal experience with agoraphobia causing me to lose social interaction and the only way from there is a viscous horrible downward spiral. It is SO hard to get out of, because with only one’s own thoughts reality starts not to exist after a while. It is pretty scary. I also have a close friend who worked on a cruise ship and was not allowed to leave his cabin during a lockdown, and even though the passengers were let off, the crew were forced to stay for two months. They also hardly had any internet access and the rooms were incredibly small. Seeing how hard it was for my friend… this isn’t something to trifle with. Not worth any money in the world. Definitely agree with you Cris!

[@kat_kami]

Ok hear me out, let's get Ben his Greece vacation and let's get Cristine a ancient greece/mythology inspired collection and a lot of interactions with many stray cats💕

[@valap_]

He's coming for you....................................🐌

[@valap_]

Here are my snail body guards 🧂🧂

[@WYIN98]

​@@valap_ omg 💀💀💀

[@BlkBeltMama]

I can see the new Vacation collection box, it looks so cute with the umbrella in the sand and the water...I wanna go on a beach vacation!!!!

[@thenotsotalented1]

Gavin's snail hypothetical has been making its rounds on all my feeds recently lol

[@SilverWolfChaos]

That's who I think of everytime I hear it🤣 gotta love it

[@QParkit]

I've noticed that it goes viral every couple of years for a while now.

[@thenotsotalented1]

@@SilverWolfChaos ikr I had to go watch the rtaa again lol

[@Josie-Rosie]

So happy Ben got his vacation and we get a new beautiful collection ❤ So excited for Saturday 🎉😊

[@imagine_name1256]

I love that on the episode that ben is sick, he is the most energetic ive seen him for a while

[@Daniela-xy3ow]

I love peace and quiet as well, but an entire year in a room with nothing in it? No way 😮

[@megan_pinkerton]

The OGs know that the snail question originated from Gavin Free on the Rooster Teeth podcast. They've even made a whole Million Dollars But (MDB) game.

[@julia8523]

Happy Taco Tuesday Holo fam!! Holo detectives peeping the new box 🫣🤔

[@lexvranick5217]

Entirely unrelated to the episode itself, but Cristine's hair looks so cute with those curls!

[@Sttiili]

Hey Finnish person here! The speeding tickets here do work like that, but for everyone it is a significant price proportional to their income. So for someone with a smaller income it still stings 😄

[@jane_doughnut]

Tetanus is interestingly enough not from rust. But rather is a type of bacteria mostly found in the soil and dust! So it makes sense, most things that rust, rust outside and is exposed to soil or dust! Which is why you get a tetanus shot if your skin is pierced by rusty objects!

[@emacd520]

I have missed you and your guys conversation! Thanks for the upload. Edit: made it the end of the podcast. what makes it so enjoyable when you do post is when you are doing it FOR FUN. Take breaks as much as needed when it stops being fun.

[@LizzieDunlap]

I'm 💀 over the snail conversation 😂😂

[@amynellibabi]

I know a million dollars isn't nearly as much because of inflation but that money would still completely change my life so it still seems like a lot to me.

[@torinkyifh5085]

Literally at this point 1,000 dollars would change my life bro

[@SimplyNotLogical]

I hear you, as I said it doesn't mean people wouldn't be grateful for a million dollars today.

[@decswxaqz]

I imagine that most non-rich people, think of large sums of money in terms of buying a house, and the stability that it provides. But in the major cities of Canada, one million (Canadian) dollars doesn't even buy a whole house. Maybe an apartment, and even then not in the downtown core. So if one million doesn't buy a house, and the stability, it doesn't sound like a lot. (ignoring all other conversations about moving to a cheaper area etc)

[@leggi_bois4eva]

​@decswxaqz agreed. I'm in the "a traffic ticket is nbd" financial bracket, but can't afford a house 😅 1 mil would go very quick for me and I *still* couldn't afford a house

[@TravisKerr1]

@@leggi_bois4eva "1 mil would go very quickly for me" is a level of privilege the vast majority of the entire planet only wishes they could even say.

[@Uncle_Flanos]

Cris stop making every scenario difficult 😂

[@spookydunes]

Depending on how someone responds to their nurturing they fall into one of these natural inclinations - yearning for more social connection or deferring from it. In my experience the most “well adjusted” people as Ben may be alluding to fall into the first category of wanting more connection but I guarantee they have the hardest time being alone. Because they have a tendency to fill themselves with external stimuli, so often when they are alone, the vast empty internal world is faaaar tooo daunting. But the factor that is more painful then loneliness is feeling unloved, which is what really plagues people in solitary confinement or who’ve been abandoned or neglected. Which is so different from the conscious choice of being alone because it makes the person believe there is something fundamentally wrong with them - which is the premise of exile.

[@Unassumingathlete]

Stores always be shutting down in Canada and breaking my heart. I’m devestated about bed bath and beyond 😭.

[@rusicaria2154]

I'm so glad that this podcast exists. I love it so much, thank you :)

[@jampsonn1826]

I laughed so hard at 17:00 with Cristine saying "I think it's an addiction" almost like this was a hummus intervention for Ben. 😂😂

[@ginnyc]

I think the movie was on Hulu - The immaculate Room. Cristine was correct it was Kate Bosworth. I think it would not be as fun or relaxing as Ben thinks it would be to be without any stimuli for a month. One million at Target would be fine. They sell electronics, books, clothing and food! Ben hope you are feeling better. The "I like you" at the end was sweet. 💜

[@jewell4721]

Yall are right imo 1 million is an amount of money, an amount that i would be willing to do quite a lot for, but 1 mil is not set you up for life money its be careful or it'll be gone in 5-10 years money

[@mishafox2957]

Beynn you are absolutely underestimating how hellish solitary confinement is. It’s inhumane. A year is unthinkable. And this coming from someone who’s incredibly introverted

[@lizalove91]

IM NOT EVEN KIDDING I GOT A HUMMUS AD 😂😂😂

[@sillymunchkins4life]

👀 👀 👀 I see something behind the one-coat chrome box....I'm so excited!!!!! 🧐🤩😍🥰

[@beautyunboxed530]

Holiday collection box behind Cristine...❤❤❤❤

[@chronicallyalexis]

Ben: * trying to be smooth with the comment about cris’ cold hands * Cristine: okay, so Ben is feeling unwell! 😂

[@sahityaappala]

I just listened to two adults talking about a hypothetical snail hypothetically trying to kill one of em and them coming up with EVERY POSSIBLE SITUATION for a full half hour And i have no complaints😭😭

[@sahityaappala]

Okay so 15 minutes But still😂

[@yoshishoots22jocyd731]

Love the rainbow 🌈 on Bens screen😂

[@daliahmeadow5257]

I haven’t eaten meat in 10 years. 10 years x $5k a year. I’ll be waiting patiently for my $50,000 😂😂

[@lovely.and.lacquered]

Right? As a 20 year vegetarian, sign me on up! 😂

[@mlwgurl]

Deer Canadian friends, make sure you check out the hurricane situation before moving to any islands! Also, you used to be able to just buy a cheap house in Florida but not anymore! It's way too darn expensive for even the locals...

[@kianna270]

Yeah ahahah I’m from fort Myers beach and the amount of people thinking they could get cheap land after Hurricane Ian was hilarious 😂 y’all beach front will always be in the millions, even if a hurricane just hit 😒

[@roses6225]

Look at that new collection box 😏

[@fueluponpositivity]

The end of this podcast is everything 🤣

[@nataliesue2485]

I can relate to Cristine 😂 in so many ways. ❤

[@larryjester]

Wow. Usually i juat watch the ones frok the week prior. Nice to be early on these for a change.

[@larryjester]

I work at a grocery store, that's the last place I was. Ibwould buy quite a few gift cards. We also have clothes and shoes. So I would buy some of that. And probably just eat healthier expensive foods until the money runs out lol.

[@emma.ellis.]

love this podcast

[@topicecream4930]

57:52 MOM AND DAD ARE FLIRTING 😭🤣

[@jennwolff3776]

This came from Rooster Teeth podcast! They actually had a whole card game of "Million Dollars But..."

[@stephanie28]

Lucky for me, the last store I was in is a Costco! lol😂

[@ATrace-pn6wx]

Im also watching Silo! Its so good so far!!!

[@andrewkirkland8888]

That one about choosing someone to die, it's basically death note. Honestly i think it'd be interesting for them to watch the death note anime and then have a podcast episode about it, what they thought of it, stuff like that.

[@j4_ni]

Ben is right we have that system in Finland where the fine is based on the driver's income

[@gonegarner1373]

That's awesome to know, does it work?❤

[@ALf-tv3ct]

“You’d suffer…on Twitter” bruh😂😂

[@M_Sandstrom]

hypnotized by the reflection of the rainbow light in the laptop and how ben's hand sometimes casts a shadow on it

[@yogurtskittles]

Wow the background is looking extra pretty today

[@DooBeeDooBeeDoBah]

I love that hair style on Cristine

[@CreativeWriter19]

The last store I was in was Walmart, which really isn't the worst place to have to spend a million dollars. They have just about everything, so I'd be basically set! 🤣

[@bd1293]

The next collection box is the first with a design isn't it 🤔 from the teasers I can tell I won't like the box, but I likely will LOVE any glitter formula polishes (except for the sand themed one). Can't wait to see what they look like!

[@kayenjee]

Yes Target has computers, phones, food, seasonal, pet stuff, bikes, all the things 😍

[@BilePirre]

Yes, it is Finland where we do charge speeding tickets based on your income :)

[@lizalove91]

We see you peeking the new collection box there lol

[@kimmmy86]

Last store I was in was Target. I would buy way more than I want and donate the goods for those in need

[@mobuckey]

Ay we lived in the Bahamas for a bit, shoutout to Freeport! It's beautiful and a great place to scuba dive

[@belen-1808]

You should do a STAYcation collection as a sequel

[@macmclernon9603]

Friends of mine biked all the way from London to Rome and had a blast... admittedly they needed to take the ferry to Europe...

[@nailsarelife]

So far, I have two quick answers: Money and never paint by nails again: Hard no. Money to spend a year in a room: Another hard pass. I can't imagine my mental state with no stimulation for a year.

[@sandrapuntoefe]

Aw the end 🥺

[@jillian4473]

I work at old navy and so yall talking about it was hilarious

[@netralexy]

Beyyyn makes me laugh soo much

[@ErinAdore]

I did the math once and it will take me like 33 years to earn $1 million at my current wage so if I won $1 million I would definitely quit my job and just live the same way I do now lol

[@lazy_potato]

Would you live the same way tho? 🤔 Once a person gets a mil it may get difficult to fight the temptation to splurge "just a little". And the little splurges could get outta hand real quick! 😅

[@kianna270]

Interesting. Instead I would invest it, continue working for awhile to pay for expenses and then hopefully retire early with fuck you money and travel the world 🌎

[@hesitantsoulmate9056]

About the inverted vision/movements! Our brains are very much capable of adapting to this and this was tested with glasses that invert what you see. Eventually the participants’ brains learned to adjust and flip the visual signal coming from the eyes. Just a fun fact I learned in med school.

[@krompus8180]

The biggest speeding ticket fine I was able to find from Finland was indeed a hockey player Rasmus Ristolainen who plays (or played at the time) for Buffalo Sabres and he was speeding 81km/h (40 miles) on a 40km/h (24 miles) zone in a middle of city and with his income the price for that was bit over 120 000 euros. This was in 2019.

[@julia8523]

Ben: I like when you...put your hand on my head 👀😅🤣 57:57

[@ItsKaramelloh]

Ben flirting with Cris and her trying to deflect is my favorite thing ever.

[@dopaminedrought395]

I'm pretty sure Vsauce did an isolation chamber experiment and it was much more difficult than expected.

[@gem.s.1991]

The Katie's are coming for Ben 😂😂

[@id3389]

If you find out where the snail is, you can trap it in a cup full of cement 👀 and then happy life with your 5 million! 🎉

[@christinasanderford5849]

I love Simplypodlogical also my last store was Michaels, I could easily spend a mil on art stuff.

[@jenneric03]

Oh god. The snail…. *so this is Christmas….*

[@justsam4321]

"i think it's an addiction" 😂That killed me.

[@squinterbynature]

The last store I was in Costco, I’d go all out!

[@bigfrankoceanfan]

cristines hair is so cute omg

[@artangelfae]

I love her hair down!

[@jacqweee]

when healthy people go into solitary confinement they’re not coming out healthy like it’s incredibly detrimental to us as social beings

[@karinalumen9722]

The “most people who wouldn’t are lying” mentally affirms that some people genuinely dont not understand not everyone is like them. Not everyone has this desire to choose death for money/play god

[@redblacklife]

Agree more with Cristine these dilemmas. We are always being monitored, snail or not we would die eventually. Ben, eating hummus for 2 meals per day is a lot! Totally would move to Canada or in the EU for benefits, though still be taxed for being American. Playing Death has reprecussions (unless it is a bad person with no negative consequences to their death), I had what Simply said in mind with someone already dying. Target is the equivalent of Walmart, but they price discriminate in cities for staple goods. Most department stores are not doing great unless they have online sales. I would paint press on nails. Solitary confinement in the American sense is torture. Nordic prison sense if someone gave you books and activities to do then maybe. We need pensions to supplement. The max social security gives you is 18k-19k/yr which unless will disqualify you from social services. You have to pay premiums for medical costs and for housing at this income level too. Unless you have children/other family support or other income, seen too many cases where people work at old age not because they want to, but have to for basic necessities.