Celebrating Trans Joy (w/ Ash Perez) | You Can Sit With Us Ep. 216

[@monlovebug]

I saw a comment about how the try guys first became popular as cis men embracing their femininity and now ash is doing a series about being a trans man exploring his masculinity 🥹 full circle moment

[@karenesq419]

dang that comment is so spot on

[@hank_430]

I love this so much!

[@gabecaruso6273]

Trans guy here, ten years into my medical transition and this is so refreshing to see. Transitioning is such a unique experience and it’s so cool to hear people talk about it and its intricacy

[@blake_ilan]

Same here! Literally 10 years too😂 So thankful for you both.

[@agwarddd]

I just watched the episode and I cried at the end with Ash’s mom. The joy of this pogi boy really receiving that affirmation and the shared sentiment of missing his father was so beautiful to see.

[@sierravalentinee]

I EMOTEDDDDDDDD ❤

[@navideology]

❤

[@masabreuer]

Where can I watch it? 😢

[@agwarddd]

@@masabreuer its currently on Second Try TV, their streaming service. It will be viewable on KZbin too in time, and they usually announce weekly what videos will be coming to KZbin next.

[@mitchb9882]

new guy tries is my favorite thing to come from the new streamer - I'm a man who has always struggled with my relationship with masculinity and gender, especially as a child, and this show was so so so comforting and funny and joyous. Thank you ❤

[@jacquelynchin5513]

i watched the first episode of Ash's new series on 2nd Try and CRIED. I'm a cis woman but as an Asian American, I LOVED seeing Ash's mom and her joy and pride when she saw Ash in his suit! Yeah she sometimes mixes up pronouns, but she LOVES her kids' queerness and is so proud of them. I always loved when Ash was in videos at BF for repping Asians who didn't quite fit in and I can't wait to see more Ash on 2nd Try !!!

[@navideology]

❤

[@09shorya]

Where?? I cant find it

[@jacquelynchin5513]

@@09shorya on 2nd Try! I'm not sure but it might be an exclusive to the streaming platform

[@mousestripedgrass2123]

it's out now on yt

[@remomarkable5120]

Middle-aged Asian trans man here. There's so much I want to say but I'm going to keep it short. Representation matters. I'm so glad Ash is part of the team now Eugene has left the Try Guys nest. Relatable and wholesome - take your time exploring masculinity and how femininity fits in there, too. Thank you for sharing!

[@imthehomestarrunner]

This interview got me to finally sign up to the streaming service. The way Ash talks about transness is so beautiful and insightful.

[@ItsAllyVega]

SAME ❤

[@jackie8357]

Ditto!!

[@camdenhall478]

Same!

[@victreebel170]

Ash isn't just interesting, he's so smart and funny and charming too. Can't wait to watch this.

[@MissGhostface]

Ash saying he felt safe in the world as soon as he was male 😭 That's all I want in the world, is to feel safe existing.

[@navideology]

❤

[@thebartlettbaker]

I came out as non-binary 6 months before my dad passed away from cancer. He loved me unconditionally and called me by my chosen name, Fern, until he took his last breath. I understand how it feels to grieve the moments that we won’t be able to experience because of death. I cried so many times during this episode! Ash is the representation that I and so many other folks need. I am so excited to see more queer-focused projects. From the bottom of my heart, thank you!!

[@fernshepherd3416]

Hi!! From another nonbinary Fern

[@gabbyrivera5618]

New Guy Tries was a brilliant title! Absolutely can't wait to see where this series goes. As a cisfemale filipino I absolutely loved the "filipiniality" brought into the first episode. You could feel the sense of relief/self-realization when Ash's mom finally called him "pogi" - had me in TEARS.

[@sebastianxavier9068]

Hearing Ash talk about his dad is really healing for me to hear. I've been transitioning for about 4 years now, and my dad and I haven't spoken in over 12 years. The more I become myself, the more I look like him. And we used to be really close when I was little. I was his first child, and we share a birthday. I may not want to be connected to the person he is now, but I can still connect to and love the person I knew as my dad because I see him every day in the mirror. Also, the discussion about bathrooms is so relatable! I also plan out whether there are gender neutral bathrooms at the places I'm going to in public. I don't even use the changerooms at my gym because I am so deeply uncomfortable with heavily gendered changerooms, when all I want is a gender neutral option.

[@travelswithblindcane]

Thank you so much for this, Ash. I'm hormonally intersex, although I didn't find out until I was an adult since I was raised as a girl. This along with finally being diagnosed as autistic at 40 have left me scrambling to figure out who I am and how I fit into the world for the past couple years. I don't think I'll ever know, but hearing your story just helped to reaffirm that we're all people. You're wonderful and I'm really looking forward to your show!

[@tgilbs]

I wish I could give a more eloquent comment but this was such a great conversation with Ash. I was planning to watch the series already but hearing the teasers here, I know I will really enjoy it. The exploration of self, of gender, of identity -- so important. And I have so much respect for all the people, Ash and many many more, who put themselves out there, on social media, in public, and boldly decides to be themselves and hope that their actions make a safe space for others to feel seen and heard and represented. Thank you!

[@transplantman2287]

Ash talking about how he'd loved the social experience of being a woman around other women was really validating because I've felt the same. I also really loved his insight about how resisting sexism and patriarchy means that women have done a lot more exploration of their sexuality and gender than cisgender men.

[@orthenight]

I just want to say as a hairstylist, you are allowed to say you don't want to talk during your appointment if you don't want to. I actually work faster when my clients aren't talking. It's not rude to say "I just want to relax and not have a conversation during my appointment" and a good hairstylist will respect that!!!

[@katie18976]

I love having Ash on the podcast, he has such an incredible soul ❤

[@strawberrynumberone]

I'm so excited for Ash. I'm not following his life closely, but I'm always happy to see him and see how he has developed sooo much. It's crazy how some people from buzzfeed are just in my heart forever.

[@lindamoulton1560]

Ash has such a delightful personality and I'm so excited he's part of the 2nd Try family. Also as soon as he mentioned just ADR ing an episode, I immediately thought "Hmmm ADR- could be a cool podcast name!"

[@duncansonoryan]

All of this! I love this era of the try guys SO MUCH!

[@kassiesconcepts3276]

You know, I’ve been watching the legacy season, and I really find myself missing the other guys. This was the perfect time to bring in more talent. Can’t wait to see what the other try guys try.

[@ariaaspromised]

truly the only try guy i'm considering getting 2nd try for. love you ash

[@jaymiedivinagracia1977]

I learned so much from listening to this. Ash is so brave for being so open and fantastic that there is a safe space for men to talk about these things. Also confirmed what great guys the Try Guys are.

[@sarahcz202]

Ash is so well spoken and interesting! Also he's been getting his tan on, looks great!

[@olivethompson9008]

“With everything that makes you different, you go through shame first” I love hearing about this transition from shame to pride!❤

[@skylab9]

thank you Ash, for sharing your stories and the awesome first episode of your show. It was awesome, emotional, and eye-opening for all who will watch it.

[@stoplimitingme]

New Guy Tries is what got me to subscribe and I can't wait for the next episode

[@DiyosaLifeTV]

Same for me.

[@allieevans4101]

Ash is just such an amazing speaker. I’ve never been so fully invested and listening to a guest the same way

[@a_valentine]

I would actually love to see a series on Ash trying like. Traditional rituals and rites of passage into "manhood" from different cultures and like. Examine and experience what defines men and manliness in different cultures.

[@he.said.teenjiejer]

i literally just finished watching the first episode of new guy tries like, ten minutes ago, so this is perfect timing!

[@abbykrzyzanowicz4202]

My favorite episode of YCSWU so far 🥰 I love hearing Ash’s perspective and was so glad that they could join the chat!

[@amyunderwood2113]

So glad they had Ash for this and I was so excited to listen to it. New Guy Tries is my favorite show on 2nd Try thus far, and I agree that it's nice to have a conversation about the trans experience that's not miserable. As Becky said, I do not doubt that the trans experience sucks especially with how it's politicized to death but I do think it's nice to have different perspective because it's great when someone can feel more like themselves in their body. Hoping for more talks like this in the future! Thank you so much Ash for telling your story.

[@whereyoubean]

Other episodes i wanna see for new try cast, the immigrant stories.. like for YB, Marissa, Ash perspectives.

[@navideology]

Yesssssssss

[@aaronwalker2125]

This is a fantastic talk, and hearing about this show really is the thing that is pushing me to try out 2nd Try. Like… this is the thing that NEEDS a platform like 2nd Try to exist, and this show NEEDS to exist. Looking forward to seeing New Guy Tries. Thank you all

[@kabean09]

This whole episode made me warm and fuzzy inside, and a bit emotional (in a happy way!). I love Ash and love hearing about his experiences in such a welcoming setting. Keep bringing him back!

[@jzrth]

I’m a trans masc and am very masculine on the outside but find that I connect to my feminine side (on the inside) a lot. I also have more girl friends vs guy friends. It’s always so relieving to hear other trans folks relating to this

[@kathysanchez501]

This single handedly got me to subscribe to the Try Guys because I HAD to watch this video!! It's so vulnerable and raw- wow hits in the feels 😭❤️ love love love❤️

[@lo9659]

Such a beautiful ep yall, something abt a cis guy connecting with a trans guy abt masculinity is so beautiful and healing esp with ashe’s story with his dad, really beautiful stuff yall ❤️❤️

[@AshtonGarland]

I’m a gay trans man and it wasn’t until I went to a trans men’s summer camp that I felt comfortable and safe around other men. I came out as trans at 8 and came out to myself as gay at 9, I always had this feeling of safety and belonging around girls and women. I’m 23 now and it’s been super healing connecting with my community within the lgbt+ community.

[@geraldine645]

I love and appreciate this conversation! Cant wait to see the rest of Ash's series!

[@Kat_IsAPotato]

I haven't really been convinced about subscribing to the streaming service before, but this is seriously making me consider it

[@QuixoticAdventure]

Ash’s new show is my absolute favorite ever. I laughed, I cried, I learned, I felt a sense of safety. Thank you Ash. Ps- been a fan since the beginning, yes I’m old 😂

[@lmv888]

watching this convinced me to finally get a 2nd try subscription! i'm so excited for the new series

[@alex5716]

Thank you so much this episode and continuing to share your story, Ash. It is truly inspiring!

[@gwynterry]

I can’t wait to see the rest of the series!

[@francisnot_]

as an Asian trans-man I LOVE the Asian trans representation !

[@karinasalinas2931]

This is the first time in a wile that I watch a full you can sit with us episode. I learned so much, thank you Ash for being vulnerable and sharing. 🫶🏻

[@sydneyraechin9064]

I literally subscribed bc of this interview!! Loved the first episode of the new series. As an Asian American genderfluid enby, it was really affirming to see the conversations and go on your gender journey with you

[@KateMeadley]

This is such an insightful conversation. Thank you!!

[@erinhall1025]

I've loved Ash for a long time, but watching the transition has been great. My kid is exploring where they fit on the gender spectrum, and having videos of Ash to send on over to them has been great to create conversation in non-threatening ways.

[@irenedevisser5816]

Loved every minute of new guy tries ❤ 🏳️‍⚧️ the trans joy was so beautiful. Thanks 2nd try for showing that joy and what allyship looks like. I can't wait to see the other episodes!

[@byanitavirag]

Omg paused the podcast, went to watch New Guy Tries, I am back with tears in my eyes. Can’t wait for more!

[@megi_mcdink12]

I absolutely cried watched the first episode and loved how vulnerable Ash was while injecting great humor, I can't wait for more! 🩵🩷🤍

[@colinneagle4495]

I hadn’t yet signed up for 2nd Try, mostly because I already have too many streaming services, but this interview was so moving and poignant and funny and honest and emotional that I had to sign up so I could see this show myself. It didn't disappoint! If this is the caliber of storytelling on 2nd Try going forward I will continue subscribing for a long time.

[@nuloo]

I subscribed to Second Try just to watch Ash's series. The first episode was the trans content we need and DESERVE! Excited for more.

[@awsome8118]

13 mins in and i'm already crying, i will not survive the actual new guy tries eps

[@blake_ilan]

I made it about 5 minutes 😂

[@TheWorldAccordingToV]

i really loved this episode, super enlightening!!!

[@lauradevinsky2517]

I was SO excited to watch Ash's show when I saw it teased. Can't wait for more episodes!!

[@renataselby]

What an incredible episode!!! More episodes with Ash please!

[@mayarosales09]

I was JUST rewatching the old YCSWU ep with Ash, hoping that they'd do another one 🥹 yay Ash!

[@irenechaves4820]

just subscribed to the streamer to see Ash's series early!

[@ameliarose47]

I think Ash's experience is so cool to see, because he went through girlhood and understands that culture and what its like, and now entering manhood and learning that culture, most people dont do both. And seeing the perspective of someone comparing the two is a really enlightening conversation.

[@sharks.with.knives]

is the show eventually gonna come out on youtube too? because i feel like its such an important show for young trans people who might not be able to get second try to see

[@FlagCutie]

I saw the title and I don't know why, but my brain started singing "the new guy at try" to the tune of "the new girl in town." Love me some Ash! ❤

[@dianepettigrew9211]

Ahh more Ash!! Yay 🥰

[@marley6531]

As an anthropology student doing research on gender, these conversations are SO interesting. Congrats on finding and embracing yourself Ash!!

[@andrineslife]

I laughed, I cried, I love the show!

[@melissaw3020]

Such a great conversation!!

[@emisomm90201]

ASH HAS ALWAYS BEEN A FAVORITE OF MINE HES SO SKRONG ❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@hank_430]

I've been in the male sphere for 5 years and yes, totally agree with Ash that it was TERRIFYING coming into the male space now being seen as a man myself because previously I had been the tomboy of the group and understood how to perform that role successfully in a male only space. But once I became "one of the guys" I found it so difficult talking to them because there was suddenly this layer of potential threat/competition that went up every time I got near one, like opposing magnets that meet that brief moment of resistance before connecting, and it threw me (still does!). But I would also agree that in this last year especially, I've found that with fears/anxieties about just living life right now super high - most humans, but guys ESPECIALLY, are great to chat with ONE on ONE (truly a game changer) and I've also started having tremendously deep and meaningful conversations with close men in my life and perfect strangers. I'm also closer to 40 than 30 now and I'm finding that being open, honest, vulnerable is a strength bc it's HARD to do, especially the first few times but I have found it so rewarding as it opens the door to others feeling safe to do likewise and we all a searching for safe spaces but don't know how to ask for them. I was talking with my brother and he mentioned that what we traditionally think is the height of masculinity is the image of a soldier dying in battle. i.e. self-sacrifice; and we both found that to be a tremendous reframing. I wish more of us viewed masculinity in those terms. Not in how godlike our abs are, or how much we make, or any other empty measurement. I think we would be gentler to ourselves. I think that's why I see parenthood, regardless of gender, as masculine in a way. It's how a mama-bear can be absolutely an apex predator lmao. Masculinity is about protection and sacrifice and it breaks my heart when I hear good dads saying they wish they were more masculine. Like, boo, you IS doing it!

[@redheadfaerie]

I loved the first episode so much! Though you made the reference to man v bear and earlier today I was talking to a friend saying obviously bear but man v snake I choose man. The amount of times I've been hiking and thought I heard a snake and then it turned out to be a man on a bike and I was so relieved is more than you'd expect.

[@kblive1414]

These are important perspectives to share, how exciting!

[@saggguy7]

Re: the question about what cis women can learn about men from trans men Girls. The most important thing I have learned. Your boyfriends are not washing their hands in public bathrooms. Based on my experience, 80% of men do not wash their hands. Do with that info what you will.

[@heatherashlee3858]

"It's just as 'stupid' as it is 'profound' " 👏👏👏👏 That's a life quote!!!!

[@Namite0001]

Hi fellow queers!!!!!!

[@jessonderwater3040]

I love the new series!! And I just know so much ugly crying is going to happen. 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

[@adilenequintessence]

I wonder if he will talk about his relationship with Chantel. Would love to hear about it but only if they’re both comfortable with that

[@carlapray4009]

Will the series be on you tube eventually I really want to share it with my trans son my husband and I have really learned from the first episode and think he could benefit from it

[@bradjocelynleenstra7010]

(You can share your 2nd Try log in with your son) Zach or Keith talked about they’re happy for you to share log in information at some point, it was probably a try pod?? 😂❤️

[@robinflanders3752]

I was on the fence about subbing to the try guys channel thing, but as a fellow trans I 100% need to watch Ash's show!

[@ladymelendez9471]

I love the talk about being there true SELF it reminds me of IFS therapy 😌

[@lillycrew4170]

i needed this one today!

[@cmtran94]

HI QUEER FRIENDS

[@is-yn6jf]

There's a tiny segment in the prestongoes video where he takes a train across Canada where he chats to 3 older men who happened to be assigned to sit near him about being a man and being a father that I honestly think about so often. Ash's show sounds like a deeper exploration of that. Our society needs to build back up what masculinity means to us, because I don't think we collectively have a good grasp of it, and there's so much beauty and joy in men and masculinity.

[@fajarsetiawan8665]

Ash Perez and Gabe Dunn are probably the most shocking coming out as trans men so far in my internet universe. These two guys used to be famous as Buzzfeed's love girls. They were casted in a lot of love-themed videos. There's even some situationship happening, Gabe with Garrett (the tallest guy in Buzzfeed) and Ash with Andrew (the white guy from Worth It). Man, how times do change, huh? lol

[@JW-lf6wr]

kid you not, this episode made me want to subscribe to 2nd Try so bad...! One day, I'll graduate and find work and do that, maybe!

[@natmccallion]

Rainey (sp) blew my mind when she said that gender is just a bunch of stereotypes which I think is by far the easiest way to explain it to people who don’t understand 🖤

[@ashleydabbs221]

Try guys try a girls sleepover would be INCREDIBLE!

[@lillycrew4170]

when will we get another episode?

[@maotsuka]

Is YCSWU going to be available on 2nd try? It would be great!

[@navideology]

Yesss

[@AvoryFaucette]

As a nonbinary trans person who's done speaking and 101 stuff for a while, it's really interesting to hear the BTS on some of the references and what inspired you here-for example, I had no idea about the Masterclass thing, I just assumed those clips were from a college speaking gig Ash had booked 😂I was also really curious about the third parties like the hairdresser, because I sort of assumed you must have found trans-friendly people on purpose and prepped them, so it's kind of nice to realize oh they were just people and you brought it up off the cuff (which is incredibly brave, from my perspective, but maybe that's just the millennial in me expecting violence 😭)

[@anabellaj]

9:03 BECKY THE WOMAN YOU ARE 🙏🙏 THIS IS WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING FOR *YEARS*

[@hank_430]

ASH!!! You're gay horse costume was AMAZING!!!!! Do you do any drag performing because I could tell you were holding back lol LOVE LOVE LOVE

[@hannahpickford6889]

Loved this ❤

[@honoluluw]

58:08 _women are constantly- everything- sorry, sorry! sorry for existing_

[@haileydamian]

This may be what finally convinces me to subscribe to the streamer

[@caticorn6128]

This podcast may just refine masculinity and i think might be so incredibly ground breaking

[@tin5640]

Ash was my buzzfeed crush

[@withouterspace]

why am i only 4min in and already crying 😭😭😭

[@hp6964]

I really wish we could just get rid of the all the gender barriers and expectations placed on each of them. Straight guys always act irritated at how much women talk but I think it’s because they’re jealous of not feeling like they can talk as much as us about anything and everything. But if they’re drunk, they’ll talk more than anyone. It’s crazy and exhausting what society has done to people

[@whereyoubean]

While I love the episode. Hope you can update the thumbnail of who's the hosts. Include maggie too.