Your Mom's House - Ep. 592

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WHAT IS UP YOU CHOMOS?? This week Tom Segura and Christina P discuss CP's bangs and potential nose ring, questionable goblins in Harry Potter, Tom's hotel sushi ordeal, and Charo getting high over the weekend. They review listener submissions for the "animal" challenge, read emails from a self-proclaimed straight gay guy as well as a woman who received worn panties in the mail by mistake. They watch videos of a guy who got caught stealing a package, a cool guy's dying wish, the problems with white veganism, and an Albanian Christina P lookalike. The Main Mommies also play a round of "Horrible or Hilarious?" and watch this week's batch of TikToks.
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[@Cyxz666]

If only Goth Christine could see midwest mom Christine's hair

[@SweetPotato513]

Chrissy used to be goth? I had no idea because she never talks about it.

[@Cyxz666]

@@SweetPotato513 Then let me tell you about her Eastern Block heritage and her 10 years of therapy

[@anthonymiller934]

@@Cyxz666 lmaooo y’all are too fucking funny 😄

[@jasonwinterton9369]

Christina is in embarrassing her eastern blocker golth super cool mom look

[@codyskates8]

I had the exact same thought 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@danielcruz636]

Christina is slowly transforming into her final mom form.

[@romaliwhispers]

that convo sounded like tom was making a deal with his mom

[@biguprochester]

There’s a few more layers of that onion to be pealed

[@KAPANGAAAMASTER]

@@romaliwhispers It sounded like she was becoming her mom

[@Christopher-md7tf]

She's slowly but surely transforming into the ultimate Karen. Exclusively talking about 4 topics, most of which are of no interest to other people whatsoever (like her taking a shit)? ✅ Being insanely judgemental of other people, preferrably younger generations? ✅ Being preoccupied with stuff that doesn't have to concern her one bit, like which gender a stranger on TikTok identifies as? ✅ And now the haircut is starting to morph and follow suit as well. It won't be long until she angrily requests to speak to the manager everywhere she goes.

[@Mike-zq3qc]

@@Christopher-md7tf nailed it, cool guy

[@jakemilkbassist]

"I just smoke joints non-stop" is the best and only answer to 'how do you consume weed to get high?' Well done nadav

[@evanprior4131]

Right? 😂 And it’s really strange how they talk about 50 mg of edibles being a lot to start - it’s LITERALLY NOT. Like Nadav said - 10mg is nothing. Like seriously. I never start with less than 500 mg. That’s usually the dose in one whole pack of gummies. I ate three packs (1500 mg) the other week, WHILE smoking joints nonstop 😂 - and I felt like a LITTLE BIT more sleepy/warm n’ fuzzy than normal, but like nothing crazy. 1-200 mg is like a standard starting dose. Not quite sure what’s going on with them lol. Oh well - keep ‘em high and tight! 🤙👌

[@nicholaswhitehead3437]

@@evanprior4131 I grew up in Maine and alcohol was never really my thing so naturally I dove head first into weed. When they were gawking at 50mg edibles I was like uhh do I have a problem?? lol

[@codysimi2002]

@@evanprior4131 I mean.. I've got a stupid high tolerance, but even to me that sounds kinda high haha

[@pineapplethief4418]

@@evanprior4131 weed addiction is a thing

[@TyrannyOfBenevolance]

The mommies have baby lungs

[@analogsignal]

I’m starting to doubt tinas “goth past” if she is hating on nose rings..sus af

[@vaguyna69]

she's a 40 y/o mum now homie... people change.. i used to wear ear n nose rings, now, i CANNOT stand that shit... i understand the basis of yr scepticism but... rock awn my dude.. Brisbane Australia

[@cognitivedisruption5375]

As a fellow Montgomery, I agree 🤣

[@trendylosercat]

dye that hair black and you’ve got yourself a main emo mommy!!

[@BEERBOMB113]

She honestly should

[@ballisticmonkey999]

aka a midnight snacc

[@austincagan3258]

Chicks 🐥 with black hair are da best 😎🃏

[@FloorGorilla]

She reminded me of Zahina Maltana with those bangs

[@ohjacesimpson]

@@ballisticmonkey999 this guy gets it.

[@Spawn303]

Chrissy P with that 2005 hairdo. You bet your ass I’m coming up in may

[@jjay__]

Crackle crackle

[@thehandliesthandle]

(in the distance) HAHAHAHHAHAHAHhahH

[@jasonwinterton9369]

Here's the deal man

[@freddie_mvp]

Help me out, which American singer rocked this look the hardest? I can picture it but no name comes to mind.

[@Spawn303]

@@freddie_mvp lol let’s see. You got evanescence, fly leaf, Avril Lavigne, than there’s escape the fate, falling in reverse, hawthorn heights, cute is what we aim fo, the red jumpsuit apparatus....etc lmao if she did heavy eye liner and dyed her hair black, we’d be in the midst of my high school years where emos rocked the scene 😂

[@seanprasad8687]

I love Tom really embracing the “I’m guna talk like there’s no consequences” thing

[@mattheagerty4864]

Christine’s “Why did that bum me out? I feel sad.” really got me.

[@jonnyh5858]

Christina stole valor and then she stole Justin Bieber’s childhood bangs

[@BDGMed]

Just left a comment comparing her bangs to Bieber, deleted after reading this one😂 so much better than what I came up with hahahaha

[@magisterrleth3129]

This comments section has been an absolute treat to read, thanks.

[@alexbuckley606]

Stolen childlor

[@jackmaclennan2394]

Well chic's are supposed to have bangs and mostly looks good bieber looked like a douche

[@chadday4399]

Anytime anyone gets hurt: Tom - "Hilarious!" When a bald white guy with a beard gets hurt: Tom - "That one made me sad"

[@rileyreno3884]

I’ve never noticed that but that’s 100% facts. 😂😂😂

[@anduin1]

That dude on the highway might actually be dead though

[@jurj97]

@@anduin1 still hilarious

[@danielescobar7618]

I think the “this is my alpha” “mess with my pack” people have GOT to be a group home or something. I don’t know if I’ve said it before, it’s what I think a lot of these are. Like assisted living group homes for semi independent.... toks

[@Scloopinan]

Nah this dude is on tik tok on a private account. Its demon_wolf8895 hes just a really weird dude with a really weird family

[@danielescobar7618]

@@Scloopinan if its private, im gonna bet its some kind of alter reality or live role-play thing, like broke furries or something

[@ParkerReidTims]

Christine needs to be careful, she’s one flannel around the hips away from this being a Wayne’s World parody.

[@R2D6_10]

Lmao!

[@nickkirk3391]

Spot on

[@christinasailorluna7323]

I'm dead lmao.

[@tambob82]

I love it.

[@ItsJoKeZ]

Karentina is looking more and more like she might call the cops on enny-one

[@peterspenard8175]

Was thinking she was bring back Emo. Maybe it's a character for Buns.

[@19Burgandy]

Racist..

[@zachfarnitano3496]

Underrated comment🤣

[@henrymonroe4300]

I know what you mean - native will go missing and she will report enny-body around

[@HayleyPhoebe]

That’s how you know she’s making bank now we just back and wait for her to say but my husband is Hispanic 😹😹😹

[@dralithi]

"It's really coming down" in a thunderstorm is such a dad thing to say 🤣

[@alexderoche1861]

Christine: nose rings are so trashy! Also Christine: literally pissed in an adult diaper on camera.

[@googleuser859]

And has bleached blonde hairs.

[@MrStrangeSensation]

And burps as hard as she can straight into the mic. In every fucking episode

[@Jack-is9sm]

@@googleuser859 Does she bleach her minge hair? Does the carpet match the drapes?

[@HAL-9000.]

When the fuck did she piss herself on camera?

[@ashleysartattack5600]

@@HAL-9000. a couple weeks ago on Dr. Drew after dark.

[@jayzee4545]

I'm just waiting for the "Piss Spots: Tom Segura Edition" segment.

[@Tempust97]

God i miss piss spots, we need a new episode

[@GRock5k]

"Can't believe I'm sat here at 9am listening to this waffle." Lyle

[@HayleyPhoebe]

Lyle The internet’s new spirit animal

[@H2THEP33]

Drink more u need it

[@lamppostinnarnia]

Seen as that video is from the UK, it's likely the the person in the comment ment , the man in the video is waffleing ,ie speaking at length in a vague or trivial manner, as apposed to "waffle" being used as an Adjective to describe him. ,,its funny either way though 🤣

[@slothgoingfast]

@@lamppostinnarnia am bri'ish, can confirm it means babble

[@dralithi]

So it's not an abbreviated tw-- waffle? 🤣

[@grampageoff]

Tommy's dadboner during the storm is the cutest thing I've seen in years

[@wetcrumb2191]

He's glowing with homicidal energy, he looks truly happy

[@stormmekikuo4497]

best opener ever. Tim crying laughing over the intro looking at Chrissy. good times.

[@slapxshot96]

Tom’s actual disdain for rats stems from the Rat King himself

[@CranyumHipHop]

TheoGate is alive again!

[@treyjetson5320]

Well then why does he keep going to that dank hole where rats have been?

[@ryanbaker7920]

I'm all stiff from staring at Crystal's haircut

[@alceedus]

I turn into a telescope when I see Christina’s new haircut

[@reesecunningham5206]

She melt me everyday

[@jjay__]

Crackle crackle

[@19Burgandy]

Weirdest ppl

[@smelly1444]

@@19Burgandy you're not one of us

[@smelly1444]

@@19Burgandy but you can be jeans

[@ryancarnahan9558]

" How come we're not finding fingerprints at the scene? " fucking hilarious. Footprint.

[@huntermccoolach6994]

Tom has a fetish for early 2000’s women in their twenties.

[@ParkerReidTims]

Don’t we all

[@anduin1]

22 year olds never go out of style

[@Fyrecide]

Dude I was in my late teens during in the early 2000's, and I absolutely don't blame them. Dude 20 year olds were so much more "edgy" and exciting lol.

[@hawt_fiya]

@@ParkerReidTims this

[@lv9259]

Christina looking like Garth from Wayne’s world

[@macktrainor5223]

Yup

[@marklachney420]

More like chris gaines

[@marklachney420]

More like chris gaines

[@magisterrleth3129]

I got so excited when I read that, I did a whole-ass Ryan Sickler laugh-squeal.

[@ptfarm1704]

OMG

[@JeepNReef]

I was waiting for Top Dog to pat Tim on the back when Tim was watching the thunderstorm and say ("isn't that nice there buddy")

[@alfaro999]

Tim's new web series: "Comedian in Car Pissing in Bottles"

[@owenlangford9074]

i’m glad that Tim got some relief that doesn’t involve murdering Nadav. He seems very happy

[@nicholascecil6733]

Sees YMH upload - *ERECTION ACHIEVED*

[@jzam469]

I turn into a telescope

[@Pinstripe105]

In 4 strokes

[@inwardpod]

The hendawg mix is bomb

[@zakkholguin3942]

Erection Fucking Achieved

[@Mannydamon]

If your homeless or straight from jail...

[@kurtisbarker501]

I was laughing so hard at tommy being a typical dad showing his followers the lightning as if they have never seen it 😂😂 love you mommies keep em high n tight

[@tomkern6982]

The joy Tommy feels at the end of the opening clip is astounding

[@roaddogg567]

Christina looking like Johnny Knoxville

[@totallycullen133]

i love how tom lets "Christine" onto his show every week, what a great guy

[@daleoriane6974]

give her a break guys 😂

[@totallycullen133]

she just got a big break with this feature @@daleoriane6974

[@lexilowe4928]

Christina P., a professional comedian who loves fart jokes: "I'm worried no one will take me seriously with a nose ring." Girl, please... 😏

[@wjmcd703]

It would certainly make her more attractive

[@champchamptv8413]

😂😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

[@Dean5768]

Forgetting she was the biggest advocate and user of the fart mic

[@brandontaylor9061]

Christa- "its my money too" everyone else- "is it?"

[@Black26Baby]

Tom pronounces “Valentines” like “Valentimes”. There’s no m in there Tom.

[@drock5288]

Christine looks like she just audtioned for the role of Garth in Wayne's world 3

[@lathamsimpson6115]

excellent

[@jackburgin9067]

Shaaaawing

[@robdubent]

If you’re gonna spew- spew into thisss

[@joeyhancock2530]

He’s not calling him a waffle, In England, somebody who’s waffling on or “ having a waffle” is somebody who’s saying a load of shit and isn’t making sense, “what a load of waffle” is basically what a load of nonsense

[@awake9749]

So waffles are loads SO I love loads Well guess I'm gay

[@freddie_mvp]

American muppets eehh

[@WinginitIguess]

But waffles are, quite frankly, the opposite of a load of nonsense and the best “load of shit” I’ve ever had. Wtf mate!? 😆

[@joemade7071]

Hang on waffles are good tho

[@azzyclark3860]

@@WinginitIguess stop waffling on

[@wateronfeathers]

The hidden valley ranch on that coffee table adds a layer of charm to that woman that makes me absolutely ADORE HER! Tell him sis ❤️

[@josephlittlefield2313]

Did Ennie get black history month off

[@treyjetson5320]

Nah he just on black people time.

[@christinasailorluna7323]

@@treyjetson5320 LMAO!!!!

[@youngotterking5450]

T Bunz smiling like he got milked before this

[@garlicbreadbill661]

I watch Tim and Tina as soon as they upload because I live life 365

[@deepthought1987]

keep featherin it brother

[@Dianasviews]

Wooooooo!!! 🤣

[@a.n_9364]

I like that

[@jjay__]

Give it a year

[@andrewmcdonald5275]

When I saw this comment I turned into a telescope

[@yourgameisstupid]

Christina: "Guys are sweet" Christina less than five minutes later: "Why are guys such assholes?"

[@lerp5555]

12 year olds watch this... who knew?

[@lerp5555]

@@joematthews6063 There’s a cool guy 😎 🎸

[@2Tibrok1]

52:50 I don't remember the last time Tom reacted with such a genuine disdain when he learned about a topic. Lol. I love them both so much.

[@zakkholguin3942]

The guy who wrote in about his sexuality deserves all the silver and gold for that high and tight ending.

[@marcoramos4873]

“If you won’t eat my scrum at least cut some bangs and get a nose ring.”

[@AntoninoParino]

‘Waffle’ refers to the chatter itself, the ‘waffler’ is the insult. Basically someone who never stops talking but never says anything of meaning. I know this because I am one... defo not this guy at all, he’s speaking truth. love you all chomos

[@mikolpharley6138]

Love the clip w your mom Thom. She reminds me of my GMA. She used to smoke an oz a month! Which doesn't seem like that much today, but back then... My mom's name was Kristy. So yeah this episode hit home. Thanks Guys

[@BobaTShinobi]

"Whatever nerd shit Chris is into". I felt personally attacked.

[@Kryozzzzz57]

she's gonna eat her words when her sons are old enough to play video games.

[@HarryManback0]

Nerd shit is the worst.

[@a.k.4o]

Who is Chris

[@Ethan2Tone]

@@a.k.4o he is Chris.

[@YANILLIONAIRE]

@@Kryozzzzz57 would be willing to bet she doesn't allow it

[@staynielherbayn657]

When people from the UK say “listen to this waffle” we’re not calling the person a waffle. It basically means “listening to all of this nonsense”

[@discgolfinrude]

I've never heard this saying and I'm intrigued

[@kene4151]

can confirm

[@staynielherbayn657]

@Hun Bun well basically you sniff it and it makes ur hole loose hahahaha

[@staynielherbayn657]

@@discgolfinrude haha yeah if your mate is talking rubbish just say “load of waffle that mate”

[@biguprochester]

I don’t get it. Waffles are awesome

[@GambolMusic]

the techs laughing in the back gets me everytime!!!!

[@CG-yg7dt]

I want Chrissytina to wear her goth get up one day. I’d literally die. She’s forever my top mommy.

[@benjaminadams5701]

Who would have thought that having liquid browns at 9am would lead me to this.

[@connerskates]

Beautiful

[@andrewstephens5885]

they need to read this comment, tom needs this information

[@jasonsarah2737]

Chrissy, just get a magnetic nose ring. All of the fun for Timmy, none of the commitment for you.

[@alexanderjeromewhite2380]

Great idea

[@zackjoseph9127]

Its not the asthetic. Its the intent. Fake piercing? My pp sad.

[@champchamptv8413]

Good ☝🏽 jeans You bet I’m coming up in May

[@NekoRockstar1]

People keep roasting Christina's hair, but she honestly looks so much younger now

[@R2D6_10]

Im a fan!

[@Greenhelix5]

It's odd. I'm conflicted.

[@Liax316]

I think my fav is when Tom plays a tok and after it he’s like “that was it?” Lmao

[@themaypole]

UK Slang helpline: waffle isn’t a name for a person, it refers to talking, like when someone is talking shit, it’s waffle, like I’m waffling on rn

[@richyyyyyy97]

ya swap waffle

[@HayleyPhoebe]

Can’t believe I’m reading this waffling on 😹😹😹

[@blainebrown8824]

And then there is the blue waffle

[@gowkie3940]

You absolute waffle lord

[@rambamcalcam3658]

@@blainebrown8824 LUL

[@bahahalejandra]

can’t believe it’s 7:30 am and I’m sat here driving to work listening to this absolute waffle

[@ryanchadwick4432]

Tom wanting Christiana to look 24 year old Christiana. I dig it.

[@chewy4641]

Imagining dad mode Tom investigating the house for possible rat holes makes me laugh.

[@tjnucnuc]

I’m so happy someone finally talked about the jewblins from Harry Potter.

[@pillowigloo3671]

"Waffle" is not the guy. "Waffle" is what he's talking.

[@pennydrop6817]

To “waffle on” is what he’s doing too :)

[@zombiejock]

Tom is just glassing it in the thunder storm is great

[@dasdabeatjunkie]

Listening to the audio only i find myself always waiting for christine to come up for air when laughing lol

[@erinr650]

Me: "private citizens don't need AR-15s" Me watching the package thief "weeeeellllll, maybe I was wrong."

[@clintonleonard5187]

"Private citizens don't need AR-15s" is a fine opinion to have. It doesn't mean people shouldn't be able to own them, though.

[@erinr650]

@@clintonleonard5187 I'm sorry that it's not obvious that I'm not interested in debating gun control in the comment section of a KZbin video.

[@clintonleonard5187]

@@erinr650 I'm sorry you thought I was debating.

[@erinr650]

@@clintonleonard5187 maybe do a better job expressing yourself next time

[@jeremyphillips3087]

You guys are both r worded

[@TheAlternatist]

as an Englishman: they're not calling him a waffle! Waffling is speaking nonsense! His awesome speech was the waffle in question.

[@russelldooley5705]

Indeed.

[@Jmanmusician]

*thunder strikes* Tom:"Whoooo!" 😂😂😂😂

[@RayHaglandMusic]

“Waffle” means someone’s chatting away with not much substance. You don’t call someone a waffle, what they say is waffle, they are waffling. 😇🧐

[@brandondeanmead]

“Im not a cow” while laying on the couch next to a giant bottle of ranch.

[@kiltzanm]

While dressed in cow colors

[@eddieeeeeee69]

I like how she went directly to cow hahahah

[@jeremysilva7699]

Also, no one's eating. Why tf is there ranch still on the table

[@Blueswailer]

@@jeremysilva7699 Sillygoose, every one knows ranch tastes extra "ranchy" if you leave it around in room temp for it to start going rotten.

[@BurntToast422]

Ranch is good for your blood.

[@bracejuice7955]

Christines transition into Garth from Wayne’s World is almost complete! Party on mommies!

[@Taskburg]

Found myself chuckling so hard when the poor lady fell off the thrown lol

[@nathanmiller6661]

Shouts to Christine for the subtle throwback "seal you shut" at 14:55

[@edoge5425]

Texas mommy here. The mommies helped so much watching them through the cold. Was able to find laughter though it. We love y’all!

[@AD-Dom]

Tommy boy needs Christina's hair. Karen transformation kit.

[@TASmith10]

Love the show, wish you guys had links in the description for some of the crazy videos and toks you find. Keepin' it high and tight. Thanks.

[@ryanolozn5718]

I liked how tom acknowledged he's the breadwinner

[@tobytoby8495]

If "Footprints" isn't in theaters by next summer I will be pissed the f off.

[@neutralMusic-gb8ld]

James Corden looks a bit different in the opening clip

[@BXBZ88]

But sounds the same...

[@neutralMusic-gb8ld]

@@BXBZ88 TRUE LOL

[@igfnjwrionfoiurnfoiuenr]

Christina "It's not me, it's the algorithm" Pazsitsky

[@ether725]

tha scream wit tha women faceplanting out of tha royalty sedan chair also made me laugh hysterically...

[@sinisterCsix]

Oh my fucking god I made it on the podcast!!! My life is complete

[@EddieDantes69]

"She was a BOWSER" made me cackle out loud

[@Matt-bq9ve]

This is one of the best episodes I've watch. Consistently funny

[@kaftie]

It’s refreshing to hear a little more of Native’s laugh over the hot mic... Also, they should send him to fellow comedian’s special recordings to spice up the audience reactions!

[@X3MAntics]

I feel like Tom will really like the movie "The House that Jack Built." I can see him laughing like it's a comedy. I'd pay for him to react to but I know it'll never happen.

[@alexamick6644]

Ehhhhh with what happens to the kids, I think he'd sit that one out.

[@comree11]

@@alexamick6644 lol

[@tdawg9796]

Jack was just living life 365, Tom understands that more than anyone.

[@peanutgallery7753]

I was laughing in it haha

[@Nunnnnyahsha]

Just a warning, don’t drink any water when you hear the words “big titted animal”

[@AveryPauls]

I spat my toothpaste all over my bathmat this morning because of that bit. I had to tell my wife that it wasn't cum, just Tim making me laugh.

[@davidcarroll7055]

“Waffle” is another word for speaking. Not that he is a waffle...

[@dexraikkonen7]

please excuse this dumb toks

[@tom111869]

Kristine says "specifically" as "pacifically".

[@bobbyrobinette5772]

Duh

[@Facerip]

Christina slowly turning into Karen

[@trevorallison633]

Garth from Wayne's World + Jess from New Girl = Christina from Tik Tok

[@zhamirdiaz3196]

I know he was back last week, but im glad nadav is back, missed your laugh.

[@shelbisagecreate296]

I was totally waiting for the “he has to pay his medical bills” bit to come out of the footprint/robbing scenario.

[@buffalothebison4850]

Can't believe I'm sitting here at 730 am listening to this waffle.

[@colin8570]

Kierstyn looking like a chemo patient that they wouldn’t give a better wig too.

[@Dobry69]

This made me laugh

[@jeremyphillips3087]

This made me fart

[@emilykatsman7838]

Omg yes

[@MickieSixx]

As a lifelong Florida native I can confirm that my dad also gets excited about thunderstorms and lightning and rain and just whoops at it too. Lmao.

[@GrahamPablo]

They seem so happy. I pray I have a relationship like that in my life at sometime.

[@FrostyJokerr]

Fuck, this is the earliest I’ve seen the mommies in a hot minute!

[@joelhahn1020]

Come on over for Moose Soup!

[@jjay__]

Give it a year

[@Hunter_Hult]

“He probably works at gringotts” might be my new favorite saying!

[@billyjones811]

King Ian Moore has officially gone global. All hail the King 👑

[@oliviat.4672]

Christine thinking my nose ring is trashy is right on brand