Your Mom's House Podcast - Ep. 526

All the Mommies are under one roof once again! When's the last time you played Tic Tac Toe? Bet you haven't played like this. A new celebrity has joined Instagram and he is putting out some serious Garth vibes. Plus, are you single or self-involved? And, Tom gets a new idea for the future from Cars singer Ric Ocasek.
Since Tom has returned from the road with Josh Potter in tow, we have the Cockroach on the couch to recap all of the gallivanting across Europe. Tom and Josh tell Christina their experiences in each country and we find out the conclusion to Josh's escapade we were previously teased about. Plus, MJC contest winner Jackie and Josh Potter have since gotten together, we get her whole review of the occasion and we hear about Tom's NETFLIX special taping in Austin, TX.
yourmomshousepodcast.com/
www.merchmethod.com/tomsegura/
/ yourmomshousepodcast
/ yourmomshousepodcast

[@DanteZzZ]

Hard to look at Tom now without seeing knife-stabbing move-busting super thin Saegal.

[@auraglasswerks4900]

DanteZzZ Toms a punk bitch. Divorce is in his future😜

[@Devin-zn8ic]

Do they talk about the video in this episode? If so anyone got a time stamp?

[@666goats]

@@auraglasswerks4900 oh, go to bed

[@666goats]

@@Devin-zn8ic time stamp MY FISt

[@JamesBuggemo]

I mean of course he's thin, Tom Segura has been dancing his *whole life*

[@theoffspring1232]

2 hours with just the mommies. This is a good Wednesday.

[@xXjeffXx38]

Deadass tho

[@HENSONnOZ]

Fucking love solo mommy episodes

[@thismothafuckasaid7304]

@@xXjeffXx38 Is it "Dead ass"??!!..Whole time I thought Tony from Utah was always saying "Dat ass".

[@beautosaka7493]

Only guests I’ll love every time is Brandon Urie, Danny Brown and Hairy Potter 🤙

[@austinarnold3011]

J Sakes wensdeee

[@thomasmills6634]

Potters low eye got Jackie in the high eye😜

[@_GnarDab_]

😂😂😂 god tier comment

[@extremeanalogmusic6296]

omg

[@sirsmokeefortwence25]

Lmao You win.

[@jaeubanks]

Sue Woo is an actual real estate agent where I live, I always saw her ad on bus stops and would send them to my friends. It's about time she gets national recognition.

[@chimbertocaviglia6919]

It's so obvious RPC has his dead mother somewhere in his apartment

[@takingbacktoxic7898]

I kinda want drew to find the corpse

[@matthewbaugher5064]

She's in the room he wouldn't let Josh see.

[@AH-yu2pi]

🤣🤣🤣

[@groomedtodie]

Explains the roaches.

[@genuinedelusionsmusic]

I gonna cum

[@robertmyers3684]

Josh’s intro sound bite should definitely be: “Hey... this is Josh!” cuz he was jumped in! SOOWOO

[@everyvillainislemons7583]

I was fUckeD in

[@JohnDoe-zq1ho]

After this episode, he was DEFINITELY fucked in.

[@JohnDoe-zq1ho]

@@everyvillainislemons7583 Oh he absolutely was fucked in, no jumped in bullshit.

[@MegaFlorest]

Any of you mommies know where I can find the autotuned Josh Potter theme?

[@Kbwintyy]

Why do I always choose to watch ymh when I’m eating? Why haven’t I learned?

[@gerard1784]

I've made the same mistake a couple of times

[@KevinTSanchez]

That's some real shit !!

[@stevethomas74]

Ditto!

[@samcatsam]

DUDE! TOTALLY!

[@JessicaSmith-yg9cn]

I won’t do that, ever!

[@FoolsLuxury]

I've had pretty bad depression lately and every single time I can hear the sound booth boys laugh I cant stop myself from smiling. Missed you, Jeans!

[@everyvillainislemons7583]

Mistyfrompokemon same :)

[@igobydubri]

silliness will almost always be a major weapon against the low eye. i like that!

[@stevethomas74]

Keep 'em high and tight Misty and my fellow Depressives in the comments :-) x

[@liam2x4]

Depressed people SOOWOO

[@andrewmcdonald5275]

Get offf!

[@Stonecold831]

Dont know why people are suprised he was good at dancing. Hes been doing it for like 87 years.

[@christopherminelli7593]

Nice reference

[@honestinsincerity2270]

Hey Tom Segura... You been dancing your entire life. I know.

[@xrmighty]

Great comment I forgot about that

[@Wowreally42]

He invented it and taught Michael Jackson

[@xrmighty]

@Penguini Linguini you missed the joke he used to say this about Steven Segal in his act

[@isaacmartinez7557]

I’m not saying Tom segura is John travolta, but they both just so happen to be out of the country at the same time.....

[@TheNutellarulz]

I've never seen them in the same room

[@LRBeforeTheInternet]

@Isaac Martinez They can both dance too, which is even more suspicious.

[@isaacmartinez7557]

ƁᴇғᴏʀᴇƮʜᴇļɴᴛᴇʀɴᴇᴛ Nice call. The plot thickens..

[@Xplora213]

I’m not saying that John Travolta is a homosexual Scientologist but he happens to be out of the country at the same time as Tom Segura....

[@isaacmartinez7557]

Xplora213 soooooo tommy buns is a Scientologist you’re saying? Gotcha

[@glassboxfish]

Finally, an episode that’s high and tight throughout again

[@hat3d111]

Josh turned damn near purple when whatserface was on the phone.

[@johnnyboy4845]

"This episode is brought to you by Saatva" Me: *cries out of happiness*

[@BrandonGiordano]

Never thought hearing an ad would bring me such happiness every week

[@oyeahthatguy]

Still, bummed they cut the first hour of proper long intro

[@robertgowdey]

I have a Saatva Queen luxury firm. I love it!

[@itshavoc7284]

something clever you dumb lol stfu

[@hackzein4138]

@something clever your jeans were loose, but you pulled them up now they tight

[@makkrowmazztikk7003]

Thumbnail = the last thing the starbucks barista sees

[@ZB_US]

"Jesus Christ, you fucking killed her, dude." -Push to Tom

[@Xplora213]

Joe needs to help out mommy with an alibi

[@justinmullins604]

I just laughed so hard

[@LockSteady]

Tom is the Psycho-Champ

[@hackzein4138]

Or Cristina

[@benj461]

When is topdog going to be on the podcast?

[@chaseblackledge9778]

That's what I've been saying!!

[@juztenable]

There's no greater feeling than killing the enemy buddy.

[@benj461]

@@chaseblackledge9778 does this guy qualify as a cool guy kzbin.info/www/bejne/nnynm5qihNOVnLs

[@trelambert3158]

Ben J bruh...

[@spudruckus7297]

@@trelambert3158 it's a toughy.. Legit curiosity vs possibility of visual trauma stamped in my brain forever 🤷🏻‍♀️

[@assaultmarine1464]

Honestly the best episodes are the ones without guests

[@dt9255]

It's cool they had Bert on at 16:30 Keep em high and tight mommiez

[@KN-wl4vv]

He looks like he might be at 205 now.

[@mattbob1995]

@Anton Shurik no, but his racism has been flaring up

[@jumbledump]

I haven't watched the past like 25 episodes, but a no guest episode was too tempting to miss.

[@Wowreally42]

No guest!? No Nikki Glaser telling us stories about her exes and sex life? YES!!!!!!!!!

[@dannass5]

Thank the Lord

[@boxie13]

She likes butt stuff also. But hates herself.

[@liamjones9115]

God she is annoying Her shtick is talking openly about taking it in the ass Wow! so edgy and hilarious😒

[@phaedrus1267]

When they ask her how she got into the comedy scene, she is going to say "I was fucked-in!"

[@shoejoe3518]

i aint mad at it

[@jasc1893]

Tommy's Manscaped ads are the only ones of all the podcasts I listen to that I don't skip through

[@MissAlyssamarie123]

Omg Tom Segura the pro hip hop dancer?! So glad he’s branching out.

[@jtbryan8580]

Manscape: There's no way they can make our ad any more filthier Tom: Hold my sack

[@getrickygervaisstuff]

You mean fondle

[@JohnRundle09]

^ this guy doesn't get it... it's a hold my beer meme. And may I say the funniest comment I've read this month.

[@treyparrish4444]

Holld my pocket mang

[@mattc9364]

Tom: *Adds picture of Asian women to t-shirt Cops: We'll take 200

[@jomomma7616]

Sue wu!

[@darrenXparker]

Pretty sure Matthew McConaughey knows where G hides the bodies.

[@ljjuan6627]

They share the same lots

[@jonm7361]

I'm pretty sure matthew was just baked. I don't smoke weed often but I was watching it high and thinking " this dude is just high what's wrong with that?"

[@darrenXparker]

Jon Mattingly Honestly he’s been baked for so long he is just going to sound weird.

[@mgtowanonymous3120]

*MUSIC VIDEO REACTION WITH BERT NOW WE DEMAND IT !!!!!!!*

[@theoffspring1232]

Check Bert's instagram, they posted a short video about it. Not a full reaction, but a little taste.

[@kylegaruhn4805]

instagram.com/p/B5EAVgyHnDv/?

[@mgtowanonymous3120]

@@kylegaruhn4805 looool! I was wondering if the fatty was bert in a extra fat suite or a look alike 🤣🤣

[@kylegaruhn4805]

@@mgtowanonymous3120 I thought maybe it was deepfake :o

[@mgtowanonymous3120]

@@kylegaruhn4805 loooool yea I was thinkin that to I couldn't tell hahahhahahasha

[@Madzblr]

Really needed this alone time w Tommy, push, and the roach 💗

[@honestinsincerity2270]

16:30 It's nice of Bert's neighbors to help him with his groceries.

[@MorbidDeath666]

We need more of these old school eps. The interviews have been creeping into becoming the whole show lately.

[@humpinglifedry]

scott alder I like it but just wish they weren’t 3 hours.

[@MorbidDeath666]

@@humpinglifedry I prefer long form podcasts but thats just my preference.

[@humpinglifedry]

scott alder I do when I’m listening when I’m in bed but most time it’s me and my wife watching it. Either way 3 hours is commitment unless listening at work or falling asleep to it. I miss the old shows to tho. Way more “I don’t give a f energy” a few years ago. Still love it tho

[@AnAngryVoice]

I strongly, strongly, so strongly identify with this comment.

[@hombretropical3028]

I think this is mostly because of Tom's touring honestly. Now that he's back hopefully it goes back to normal

[@Xxxsorrow]

The guy that's always violently laughing in the back is my favorite part of the podcast.

[@stevebob240]

Piss on me, beat me (at tic-tac-toe).

[@rusemode]

Cross a man out

[@marcusvalle47]

TikTok toe?

[@PowerhouseMiniatures]

@@rusemodeI'm smiling like an idiot in a doctor's office. Thanks bro.

[@oskarnilssonbaurne3317]

So happy mommy Jeans has accepted the long intros, was a stressful time a while back

[@getrickygervaisstuff]

I hate podcast music. It's just a reason to fast forward.

[@hackzein4138]

like when they almost fired Blueban?

[@idab6864]

Ugh no I agreed with her

[@shitisbigtime]

I’m still pissed that they stopped doing the intro on repeat for like 10 minutes 🤣🤣 that shit had me dying every time Especially the one time when Tom would keep bringing it back throughout the episode, that was my favorite lol I gotta find which episode that was

[@Knight3434]

This was an iconic episode which fully encompasses YMH and why I tune in every week. Keep em high n’ tight mommies!

[@stefbruins7411]

Tom you are the DANCE CHAMP

[@AmericanArgonaut]

Tommy Bunz is literally leveling up right before our eyes. Killing it! Bert must be soo jealous.

[@travishasfun]

I thought they were gonna change the theme song a while back, josh’s rendition would be nice every once in awhile at least.

[@403.FORBIDDEN]

Yea the wavy arms part hits me kinda wrong

[@jbod506]

travis adams exactly what I was thinking now that they are back in the states

[@annabelledacuycuy990]

Missed you Tom! Christina and Josh kept it high and tight while you were away.

[@VideoNozoki]

Jackie sounds like the coolest person. (considering the situation, I was expecting someone weird in some way. She sounded totally nice and normal.) Yeah Jackie! way to represent Canada.

[@Bf2142Samuel7777]

Christina P guilt tripping tom with texts while he's there with potter. I'm rolling in tears, that's so savage. what a story

[@nicoleeliz]

Ok. I need my “Sue Wu” Shirt 😂😂😂 Holy fck I’m dead

[@samwasserman1837]

Just lost my job, bout to invest all my savings into multivitamins.

[@slicedbread5692]

Onnit.com

[@Corkoth55]

Try it out

[@christiancapitalist501]

Did it help you in the long run?

[@HollieForrest]

Just the mommies!!! Yes!!!

[@anaiva8299]

I follow You and the Mommies!

[@djschultz61]

Wow, you are *everywhere*. May all of your enemies be plauged with low and loose jeans.

[@deltablaze77]

Jackie seems like a lovely and genuine person. Bravo to her.

[@swampwitch5]

"I love people that don't want to talk to me."

[@AndersonThomasA0101]

Awe Jeans, an HIV "cocktail" is a combination of anti-virals... it's not a shake or drink.

[@Hevvvyyy]

HIV cocktail reminds me of a bloodborne item haha

[@kjcorder]

fuck,she's stupid. poor tom. hope he finds his dalmatian

[@brianna094]

@@kjcorder Jeez

[@grantstonex]

Timothy, your dance video was somehow much more amazing than I ever could have imagined. That shit was comedic genius.

[@MrHighSchoolVlogs]

Grant Stonex *Tomothy

[@KN-wl4vv]

Don't skip the manscaping ad at the beginning. It's great.

[@kevinyeager9023]

For real tho... Prolly the best ad I've ever sat through 😂

[@bryanstiener1535]

thanks manscaping rep. we'll watch your ad.

[@current04]

Your rotund man looks like the "bad guy"from the south park episode that tore wow to shreds lol

[@Mgraham771]

Anyone else think Christina was dressed as captain Marvel?

[@jesseknox9322]

Now that you mentioned it... to be honest Christina might've played the role better

[@hombretropical3028]

@@jesseknox9322 *Marcel

[@JeEnYuS504]

Christina probably hates the idea of female superheroes.

[@rychehitman]

100%

[@gonufc]

Sounds like Jackie was quite literally both high and tight! Also, Mcconaughey reminds me of the speech rhythm of Hedberg on that first one. But without a punch line.

[@everyvillainislemons7583]

Matthew just made a movie with Snoop Dogg and Harmony Korine, you know he’s on something in that video lmao

[@JeEnYuS504]

Christina: "So clearly Josh didn't wear a condom, so Jackie did you wear a special 'outfit'?"

[@evandowns9661]

I love at first people were saying the intro was too long, then Tom made all of us want a longer intro, and they never changed the original length.

[@shitisbigtime]

RIGHT WHERE IS THE LONG ONE

[@grantstonex]

Just the Mommies together? Oh..... I really like that

[@melissamellati9668]

Wait what the heck why didn’t they ask if Jackie came?? That was all I wanted to know

[@codykendall2846]

You had to pay for that

[@slicedbread5692]

@Matthew Rasero are you kidding? Cockroach is swingin that hammer like a deck builder being paid per nail.

[@UToobSteak]

Hey mommies! This is just what I needed after dealing with the FGTRTDs at work all day. You guys are doing good!

[@hichaelmartline]

"it's international roadass" - Josh Potter

[@silly982]

MY MOMMIES ARE BACK AND MY JEANS ARE SO HIGH AND TIGHT

[@chitownstrangler1]

Want to watch me get off in 4 strokes?

[@ClimptonDiddlehopper]

My jeans get tight thinking about RPC

[@love31musik]

The whole time they were on the phone with Jackie, Tom looked SO irritated. Hahaha.

[@Sabbathguy]

I think thats him trying to deal with the awkwardness of christina step by step asking how jackie and josh fucked xD just overall a pretty hard thing to keep a straight face while talking about it

[@VideoNozoki]

--irritated-- jealous (and embarrassed but glad Christina P is asking the questions we all actually want to know)

[@ghoulsarefree]

he's embarrassed. tbh i had to skip the whole convo, even tho i had been waiting for closure on this subplot haha

[@BloodyCaesar22]

That song at the end is a song I would actually listen to lol

[@igobydubri]

Camdon Inks thanks Jeans!! I just released it on SoundCloud , you’ll also find “That’s My Jean” on there . That’s My Jean is available everywhere , and this one , “Where’s Your Water” will be on Apple Music , iTunes , Spotify , etc in just a couple days. soundcloud.com/dubri/wheres-your-water

[@fomurillo1024]

Im looking for the soo woo song, yall remember what episode that was in?

[@jrbird1983]

the dog mask behind Tom is made from a John Travolta mask. Once you see it you can't unsee it.

[@cireyenned]

Can't believe he stabbed Bert that was so savage.

[@jomomma7616]

Two words: no mercy

[@drgonzo1971]

End the Tim Dillon ban!

[@kevinyeager9023]

He'd be great as a guest on here

[@spudruckus7297]

Yes!!!

[@emdw14]

Being from Buffalo, the story about Josh is honestly awesome to hear. Lotta good memories with Canadian neighbors haha

[@zacharyjohnston58]

That was wholesome. Definitely needed an update from my main mommies

[@PatGturdgangofficial]

You guys should have more episodes without guests. Don’t get me wrong I love the guests but you guys are great together

[@kus88]

Also Jackie and Josh are actually going to end up getting married

[@seanforehand755]

100%

[@jomomma7616]

I hope so

[@techloto]

The Magic Johnson bit killed me. I haven't laughed that hard in a while! "Oh it kills poor people, I thought so... The shakes had uranium in them" 😭😭😭

[@Guttermouth-tf3yn]

The M and the E = Mother Earth LMFAO

[@platapus112]

The black guy that wears the turban is Justin Trudeau

[@spudruckus7297]

I fucking died reading this! Thank you 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😅

[@maplesyrup76]

That was amaze.

[@traptime9505]

😂😂😂

[@goombajenkins4317]

haa

[@gabrielbelmonte8521]

Josh is an great guest didn’t even know he was being interviewed

[@hay7501]

You write dumb

[@nickolasroig7360]

Nothing better then a mommies only episode

[@cj372fk59]

I love these solo episodes so much. Keep it up mommies.

[@lebebop9931]

15:29 Man, Bart Crumples really let himself go after Sober October.

[@FrostyJokerr]

lebebop it’s the aftermath of the deep depression from losing in hip-hop dance to Tom. :/

[@jakrispy3418]

Tom Segura dance video is the best thing I've seen in a while🤣

[@MeticulousTechTV]

Whenever I look at Josh and remember that he's only in his early 30s, I realize how great I'm holding up at 31.

[@bmak24]

i lol'd so hard at "Sue Wu", i bought one 🤪🤪🤪

[@evanm1364]

It's red too lmao

[@zacharyjune7510]

This is my favorite guest you've had on.

[@TheMrbrowniie]

Gotta check out with the M and the E, keep the high eye, not the low eye

[@spudruckus7297]

Was kind of hoping the mommy's would sick the jeans army on that! 😂

[@SuplexThisBear]

John Travolta looks like he’s cosplaying as Joe Rogan

[@Sabbathguy]

We all need a Jackie in our lives

[@nottravissmith]

thtory time!

[@RossHomsonTube]

Finally, an episode without a guest

[@fleepsman1234]

Just watched instant family. Loved it man! Good work Tom! Anyone that is a fan and hasn't watched it should. It's on Hulu. Home here now. Thanks Mommy

[@IvorKC3]

I've before and I'll say it again: Blueban cackling in the background is one of the best parts of the show. Fuckin kills me everytime

[@TendoTheDude]

If Emma Watson is self-partnered then I'm trying to get in on a three-way with that couple, ya know what I'm sayin. Can I get a amen

[@NotKimiRaikkonen]

I never thought she was hot? Maybe cause I'm not into Harry Potter?

[@goombajenkins4317]

@@NotKimiRaikkonen nah its just that ur gae

[@tbmb9531]

Josh has to give Jackie another go. She’s the one

[@andersonash9059]

It’s so dope to get a YMH Notification for a new episode while watching an old episode.

[@MrSpeedyAce]

I’m so happy listening to Josh’s girl. She sounds awesome 😊🙌

[@BrandonGiordano]

Sounds like Jackie might be wifey material for the ol' cucaracha

[@jaydubs9803]

Is it weird that they didnt ask Jackie if she came? I wonder and I'm a dude ferchrissakes

[@Fryed_Bryce]

Gaaaaaaay

[@Cierbhal]

Also, a dude and I was disappointed they didn't ask. At least CP should've asked.

[@Cierbhal]

@@Fryed_Bryce Sounds like you would have been in to the hooker from Milan. JS.

[@seanforehand755]

She said she loved him almost immediately, she came buckets.

[@underthetrees4780]

@@seanforehand755 exactly, if she's down for round two, she got something out of it. He obviously has stanima, so I don't think Josh's ability to please a woman was ever in question.

[@Matt-gs2mf]

god i love these solo episodes so much

[@contentcop]

i love that the cops were like "hey dont do this" so tom just fucking doubled down and still did it lmao

[@ryancline54]

It's kind of like a cop telling you to put on your seatbelt so you just put it over your shoulder

[@Docoloco123]

Christina acting like weed gets in the way of intimacy lmao

[@Fryed_Bryce]

Normies don't get it....it's not totally her fault

[@bryanstiener1535]

what if it does for her? lmao

[@Kyronite]

It can. Weed effects everyone differently

[@rodriguezro9999]

I TURN INTO A TELESCOPE

[@CujoLonkey]

Prolly my favorite episode of 2019

[@Evac0721]

32:14 Weird that i noticed the DVD behind Christina as she said "tippy toe"

[@darkyolks]

Tom and Tina should make tinder profiles and see who can rake in more matches

[@jonanderson5137]

This is B.S. Push would easily get 10x the matches.

[@TrickyyRicky]

Girls on dating apps can thousands without even trying lol

[@adriangambino7457]

“Guess who’s back? Jeans are back !”

[@nataliem.2651]

All the giggling on the phone call was hilarious and adorable

[@donpepeho4534]

Lmao used thats guys joke for your shirt. Genius!!!!