Flying Death Traps | 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 193

[@robk9871]

Tommy’s improved physical appearance and Bert’s deteriorating appearance is causing quite the jarring contrast.

[@classentransporthotshot1496]

Yeah he got that boozeface

[@deansilva8401]

He cant get out of his own head long enough to make meaningful progress and get healthy

[@deansilva8401]

He talks himself out of any help he needs

[@Mae__Day1]

Omg yesssss... crazy part is that Bert would probably look great if he lost 35 pounds and got a hydro facial

[@WalkerRamsey]

honestly kinda sad seeing bert's digression. bro's face is so inflamed. wish he followed tom on his health journey

[@boostry5947]

Hey guys, I just want to say that watching this podcast today definitely helps save my life because I’m going through a very tough time, and I almost decided to end my life watching you guys talk definitely make me laugh and value the things in life so I just want to say thank you so much Bert and Tom for putting a smile on my face and maybe one day in my life I’ll be able to meet you guys

[@RAM1592]

Stay strong brother! You’re not alone out there!

[@dylankpessou2043]

Keep pushing Big Dog you got this. Your life is precious and it does get better just keep getting after it! ❤

[@PEGGLES93]

As someone from the UK the mince pie talk had me scratching my ears out 😆

[@ITNOJ1]

Got to love Bert's version of history .... The Hindenburg was one of many many old air ships that used to travel world wide ....

[@TheKeeperOf-Real]

Sooo Leanne musta told Bert what she really thought of him last night😂

[@brian4571]

"I'm gonna throw up, get me a breakfast burrito." I still can't tell if that was a joke or not.

[@AJ-ut8cz]

Balloons and blimps aren't scary, bert's just a big baby

[@EyemBobbyMom]

Bart looks like he’s getting ready to star in Tim Allen’s replacement for the Santa Claus 4.

[@dunnobagels]

I think this is the first two bears I've enjoyed in a while. It's seemed like they have been phoning it in but this one worked for some reason.

[@newto-da-game6483]

I am one of 7 living in Wyoming, and my family would love to see 2 bears in town (Cheyenne/Chey-Town

[@chaserrs5198]

My mouth waters uncontrollably every single time I’m about to throw up. That can’t just be me 🙃

[@alexandercrane4033]

I came here to say this exact thing. 😂 This happens to me every time

[@johnclaudetaylor5224]

It’s normal. Body lubing everything up for easy passin

[@kelloggscuts1820]

All those gallons of Kool Aid are catching up to Bert 😓

[@FullyTourqed]

Next 2 bears live should be a race event in tommys car

[@brooksdurham8244]

Bert straight up said “LDBTQ” and kept it rolling like everyone knew exactly what he was talking about. #bertspeak 😂

[@FluffyMatzahBalls]

Here to say I'd for sure watch a companion podcast about Answering Bert and Toms Questions!

[@justwin970]

My mouth always starts to water right before I suddenly puke

[@RafaelMartinez-cv3uw]

I can’t wait for the eventual Rogan intervention for bert.

[@paulodmanoel500]

I don't think Rogan cares enough for Bert. He already got involved in the sober October and Bert always come out and return to his habits.

[@matttrue180daniel6]

Sledge hammer 🔨 was awesome!! 👏

[@Zacharyflores713]

On this episode of Bert almost cancels 2 Bears lmao

[@scottthebot3896]

I woke up this morning bc of my indigestion and violently threw up. Breakfast of champions.

[@Tanukieats]

@ymhstudios - If you eat Surströmming then you have to come to Sweden when you eat it ! My treat :D

[@johnmccabe1974]

Mince pie is different from a 'mince meat' pie in England. Down-under, when you say mince-pie you mean mince meat pie. Mince pie in the old country is a Christmas dessert pie made of dried fruits and nuts.

[@aneetarasool8305]

you haven’t lived until you’ve eaten a minced meat pie! 😋 👌🏽

[@baconator9043]

Bernard, that word is called Nausea.

[@nicksilver_music]

Bert and Tom playing VR together, set up the cameras, save it for YMH Live, your welcome, hire me 😊

[@wm1pyro]

I hope they get Mr. Beast to sit in.. not to interview but to talk about how blimps suck and about stores that offer water at the door

[@timgonzales2891]

Bert considers us "civilians". See, we dont eat and drink and "hang" all day. We just dont get it. 1 out of 1000, Thank'em

[@Toddis]

Yo Tom looks like he's having an allergic reaction with those puffy red lips 👄

[@nickdomer8715]

See ya at the Drive Tom, already, I have a garage there if you wanna keep your race car there, met ya at Harris Hill, , you seem like a very nice person

[@viktor821]

Doing surströmming outdoors is no biggie, try doing it inside so the smell is concentrated

[@jbin2424]

Nobody in the last 1000 years has ever referred to it as a 'Mince Meat Pie'... It's Mince Pie, they are a Christmas-Only desert / snack... and they're fucking disgusting. I'm British and in my mid 30's and I can safely say I count all the Mince Pies I have ever consumed on one hand. They are an abomination. My late Father used to say the same thing about Mince Pies as he did about Turkeys at Christmas... "There's a reason we only have it once a year... And its because its fucking dreadful."

[@shoedil812]

Se Gu Raaaaa hayiaaaa. Sounds so Japanese!

[@MegaWilloughby]

Top Dogg and Bart is Goose.

[@klippy2345]

Bert is the man!

[@RandyWatson80]

Maine and Wyoming are near the lowest crime states…Maine is ranked like 50….

[@16047827]

It would be my sincere joy to supply the magnificent bears with the revolting meat that is surstrømming. It is indeed very, very fermented fish, and the swedes are responsible for this monstrocity. Let me know, and i will send you the goods. We can follow it up with the chili experience a la Claus. Da Bomb!.

[@HeathWoodman]

is bert allowed outside on his own

[@kohanrains776]

57:46 that's a terrible daughter wow...

[@Zed6788h]

“My brain” I he amount of times this idiot says this is mind blowing and leads me to believe there’s not much up there

[@ReconVette19D]

Bert theres some lthing called queensnake where she does really crazy shit like airsoft guns and cactuses to their crotch its pretty bad

[@biancablast8153]

Does bert want to date Tom? I must say Tom is looking fine

[@GaryFalcon-rs5uy]

Hurry up cirrhosis, we're all patiently waiting......

[@deadstellarengine]

I think we should petition to have BLARRRRP do Ayahuasca. Tim has already done it, and it's time for Fat Sticks. Talk about someone who need's an ego intervention, a dark night of the soul, a spiritual reset. It could save his life. Actually 100000% it will save his life. Tom can hold his lil toddler hand. Tell Blarp they will monetize it, make "The Reinvention of Bart Crystals" a mini doc about the whole process. The front cover could be Blarp in fetal position weeping in the dirt. Like a 400 lb fat fucking fetus.

[@82saw3]

In my opinion, if your son ends up gay, you failed miserably as a father.😂

[@neighborbruce]

I gotta say watching the physical progression of Tom and Bert from episode 1 has honestly been fascinating.

[@luke3258]

So sad to watch Tom and his struggle with anorexia

[@dustingery2442]

@@luke3258 Progression for Tom, Regression for Bert. Honestly quite alarming the development of the red alcoholic cheeks and nose that have really ramped up on Bert in the last 2 years or so.

[@thecasualfly]

​@@luke3258I dont think that's the case but when you can afford the best dietitians, doctors , trainers etc we could all get in that kind of shape.

[@TaylorJohnHardin]

​@@thecasualflynah plenty of rich fats

[@JessMass86]

Weird. I just went back to an early episode to compare how awful Bart looks now.

[@kristennicole5080]

We’re less than 5 minutes in and Bert is having an existential crisis

[@LAsMostwanted]

Dude!!! This comment 👌🏽👌🏽😂🔥

[@collinmorris]

I’m 4 min in and I’m done. I just can’t.

[@thebrodyyy997]

Yeah I just came to the comment section at this exact point. Can’t sleep can’t fly can’t think about his own thoughts jeezzzzz

[@kmartinquadeuce]

Lol what's new?

[@micknightmare3]

Big surprise 😅

[@pvg10876]

I can confirm that after the first 5 min of this, Bert actually has no clue what most normal people are like 🤣🤣🤣

[@to8860]

Wish he would go back on tour.....

[@MichaelNovoOfficial]

@@to8860forever

[@rollitup419]

​@@to8860nobody cares

[@pirkkala]

Toms newest special is now on netflix and his oldest special is sitting right across from him!

[@delataylor]

Haha!

[@mike-xi2pb]

That’s a real zinger bro 😂

[@totumpoleouthemud]

GG

[@efreshwater5]

Burnt is beyond a bull in a China shop. He's a conversational IED.

[@boagski]

Conversational IED has won best comment/description congratulations on your prize

[@karafitz2333]

Borth control is the worst

[@MrJderoche]

He’s a drunk buffalo in a museum 🙄

[@AndreW-yn7ux]

You tell how much Bert’s never really worked when he says someone in work boots carrying a briefcase 😂

[@tobe1207]

Drug dealer

[@shanebrooks834]

Nah like a contractor I took it.. lol

[@jakewitter2415]

😂 I started picturing it like one of theo vons cartoon/stories.

[@angelgjr1999]

Safety inspector

[@rustyshackleford8149]

On the real... Bert did really great this ep not interrupting constantly. Massive improvement, proud of you.

[@fciz2023]

Get ready for a 180 degree next week

[@scamper67566]

Probably because he barely gave Tom chance to speak in the first place. Can't interrupt when you're always talking

[@Js-hu5cm]

@@fciz2023lol

[@elguapo4268]

On the real he didn't stop talking once and he still would interrupt himself with tangents

[@tylerbrooks6063]

Huh? He didn’t shut the fuck up for 5 seconds, who could he have interrupted?

[@TheShrekage]

watching Bert just blab about whatever pops into his head, is like watching a newborn in a 50yr old's body just discovering the most basic things for the first time hahaha!

[@apatternedhorizon]

Bert is under the impression that repeating something 6 times makes it mean more.

[@KiddKaos999]

It does. It’s called emphasis.

[@cayciyoung5802]

I got sick immediately was said 8 times. I mean come on that's more than just emphasis.

[@papa_pt]

yeah u gotta make it a cold 6 pack

[@shawnmcvey7789]

He knows it makes people more likely to give up on correcting his insanity.

[@stonesoup0550]

@apatternedhorizon - I never expected an old friend to be in the comment section of one of my favorite podcasts

[@ianthain8138]

Bert and Bobby Lee are the two biggest toddlers on the planet

[@wking8]

I say we move them in together and film it, big brother style

[@AustinKampen]

Bert was on Bobby Lee’s podcast Tiger Belly a few weeks ago and it was so good. They need their own podcast to reflect back at each other

[@HadenGregory]

Bobby Lee is more of a degenerate personality (And I do love him, but it's true), while Bert is truly just a child. Bobby isn't nearly as immature as people think, he's just kinda fucked up and bizarre. But Bobby is also sober, and has only had a couple of relapses in his 20+ year journey with sobriety. But Bert hasn't been sober for more than a month (Sober October) since he turned 21 years old.

[@FantsyPants]

Bobby acts like a toddler but has that sneaky nasty streak in him.

[@SatansAvocado]

They are both about as removed from reality as its possible for an "adult" human to be. The whole LA comedy podcast scene is so incestuous its just a bunch of deluded millonaires sucking each other off

[@tonythompson2281]

Bert has been so helpful on my journey of not drinking

[@philmccrakin9782]

Loved Tom on Kill Tony. The way he chewed bubble gum and and whispered to Joe Rogan was peak entertainment.

[@snapees]

💀

[@BDTPBO]

I can’t get through an episode of that show. I’m sure it’s fun live but otherwise it’s torture.

[@philmccrakin9782]

@@BDTPBO To each their own. I love it. What a waste to have two people on for the 10th anniversary that clearly didn't want to be there.

[@graeker4286]

Blue Chew

[@flynnplumlee5293]

​@@graeker4286he was rock solid that entire show

[@dcmband03]

Bart is manic AF in this episode! He is off the hinges and so disassociated in what reality is.

[@justin8619]

The transition at 15:06 from bert screaming to him talking about betterhelp was so damn perfect

[@HubertMungus]

Bart claiming he doesn’t like to be wasteful to justify his alcoholism 😂

[@asdqwe4427]

Exactly 😂 the same guy who orders 3 meals invade 2 of them suck

[@krissykatportal]

I’m gonna have to start using this excuse

[@breadman-oc2lx]

Its great to see another Burnt Crystals therapy session held by Dr Tom "high&tight" Mommypants.

[@bicikyle_5694]

"how many people listening just have depression and just get through it?" I felt that Bert

[@hudsonclarkk]

wow. profound

[@HoveyFarms]

Yes

[@GrantPatN]

Ummm ALL OF US?!? Adapt or be left behind cmon now 🤦🏼‍♂️

[@jordostan]

He should look up survivor bias.

[@adrianbarry2000]

At

[@tontinbagnole]

Bert : I don't understand all the "day off" shit also Bert : drinks and eats everyday till he's sick ...

[@Will-vy9qi]

He thinks texting a couple people about comedy is a full day of work lol

[@rollitup419]

​@@Will-vy9qistill makes more than you'll ever see

[@polybiusv7299]

@@rollitup419 still doesn't make his opinion and perspective a little flawed... try not to get defensive of genuine and fair criticism. I don't think there is much correlation between income and wisdom/intelligence. I feel like i have to compliment bert a lot now otherwise you will double down on defensiveness but I think thats just me projecting general internet interactions. On youtube comments everyone is a bitchy contrarian

[@theglokage987]

​@@rollitup419Jesus what type of man are you to even defend thos guy😂😂😂

[@imorganmarshall]

​@@rollitup419its gonna be ok

[@handlesaretoopersonal]

Bert literally getting more out of touch with reality by the day, he doesn't believe the working class has heart medication😂

[@KashOnAir7]

This felt like a throwback episode. Especially the part reminiscing about middle school/high school hookups. No business talk, no promotional stuff. Just the two dudes. Good stuff.

[@juanjo_sound]

The one thing I admire most about Bert is his capacity to listen and conversational timing

[@juanjo_sound]

@@UnSure420 I'm not your buddy, guy

[@THADTOOBAD]

​@@UnSure420😂😂😂

[@jkid3525]

@@juanjo_soundim not your guy, friend.

[@DwarfDt]

​@@jkid3525I'm not your friend, champ.

[@commaJim]

​@@UnSure420it could be a single skill though.

[@edaponte85]

Sledgehammer special was fucking epic Tom! The Charo story had MY fucking lungs inverted!

[@auroraborealis13579]

It was great. It was so nice as a viewer to see him so comfortable on stage. The timing was 🤌🏼 I’ve seen one of the clips that was edited out and it was great as well! Can’t wait to see everything that comes out.

[@menwithven8114]

It's hilarious that Tom and Bert talk about us "normal" people like zoo animals

[@cavecanem1741]

The poors

[@menwithven8114]

@cavecanem1741 even better is "us poors" is anyone not a millionaire. I own my own company and make close to 300k a year. If I said high to him he would probably scoff and walk away.

[@cavecanem1741]

@@menwithven8114 Do you use a washcloth?

[@menwithven8114]

@@cavecanem1741 no I'm white

[@JayBry1989]

​@@menwithven8114he'd probably wonder why you said 'high' instead of 'hi' 🤦‍♂️

[@taylordowell5669]

What’s up with Bert having sleep apnea mid conversation. But he’s…..”In shape”😂😂

[@grindvilleblackj]

You don’t have to be fat to have sleep apnea jeans

[@lambert13]

It's definitely not from ripping lines of blow all the time

[@flying_nimbus7852]

Rounds a shape, so yes he's in some kind of shape

[@deansilva8401]

When bert talks about how jacked he is or how his shoulders look good i always laugh

[@verakoo6187]

Tbf he's in better shape than 80% of 50yo men.

[@ajwordy1691]

Say what you want about Burnt… he had me dying laughing this episode😂😂😂

[@Chris-vo7og]

I love the new shades of red the alcohol is making Barbs’s skin look. Wonder if they got that at Menards?

[@kmartinquadeuce]

Your Northern Midwest is showing, lol! Fleet Farm and Menards are staples, my dude!

[@LorSTApunk07]

You save big money when you shop Menards!

[@AmandaBurns14]

I'm sure they can color match it!

[@aliengranpa]

I can't walk into Menards without spending at least 50 bucks. I can go there for a single saw blade and suddenly I have 5 things on the checkout belt.

[@davidcashman2691]

The concept of Bert in the back seat of a fighter jet is one of the funniest things I can imagine.

[@Betrollin777]

I love when better help ads are read by a bloated alcoholic lol

[@blvckoutprty]

I unno about ya’ll but i’m ecstatic to see these 2 OGs back on 2B1C. It was beginning to feel like 1 bear 1 guest.

[@KidBaklava504]

Bert acts like eating a cheeseburger and drinking a double Jack & Coke is an alien concept to him.

[@CBABB27]

Can't wait to listen to Bart while Tommy watches.

[@cam3104]

People say this every podcast 🤦‍♂️ be original it’s not even funny anymore

[@deanzirolli7826]

This has to be the most overused un original comment

[@S1X_Bucks]

​@@hypnoticnut953that would be like being jealous of Mencia

[@mattchildress4136]

I like the comment. Made me smile. I don’t care if I’ve seen it before. It still rings true 👍

[@panakoz13]

​@@cam3104maybe because people hate him.

[@pt93music]

The better help plug while Bart is talking about his fear of blimps was perfectly placed 😂

[@mikeyjoestar]

The audio cutoff perfectly at “FUCK!!” 💀😂👌

[@sarahlowell3763]

I just got here as I read the comment it was perfect!! 😂😂😂😂

[@thomasvandiver1689]

I love how he did the ad read in an empty closet!

[@ClintonMad]

I don’t know how it happened, but exactly 193 episodes later it is evident that Tom is a wizard with magical powers. He has been able to lose all this weight and send it directly to Bert.

[@jarnold1789]

Very looks terrible. I just went back to the early episodes for comparison and the change in his face is pretty wild

[@impossiblegems]

Transference

[@belovedkant]

The disappointment when you wake up on Monday to find out it's not a Tom Talk this week.

[@davidjosh5640]

Tom’s knowing grins to the booth are like a fourth wall break, and very necessary when Bert is doing his unhinged stream of consciousness thing

[@Matts_Mind]

Bert: "There should be a bodily thing to let you know you're gonna throw up." So this happens to me. i get that feeling yall described, but its confirmed by my mouth watering a LOT.

[@fernandovazquez9709]

i got to this section and i was like i got to go to the comment section and i found it ! lol me too !! sorry for being weird and 3 months late xD

[@CullyColantino]

2 Bears has become a televised therapy session for Bert.

[@KiddKaos999]

We’re literally getting to watch another human being slowly become aware they are an alcoholic.

[@genemounce8302]

It's a fun ride, you oughta give it a try. lol

[@elijahperfecto9560]

I feel like a lot of people don’t give bert enough credit for the amount of random and weird shit he pulls up that ends up being a good segment

[@timbermun5012]

Lmao I want a show with Bert where he tries to explain history by memory. Listening to him explain the hindenburg was halarious idk why

[@mastergwaha]

drunk history is that, so you want him to guest for an episode? me too! GREAT IDEA !!!

[@Swearengen1980]

Because nearly everything Bert "knows" about history is wrong.

[@stephanielarsen2826]

Bert being afraid of balloons makes a little more sense now 😂😂😂😂

[@krissykatportal]

Lol he sounds like a balloon

[@MikeH7186]

I think the dentist just wanted to break Bret's jaw because he wouldn't shut up.

[@thechosenwon6762]

Bert is so lost 😢 I hope he gets better soon

[@SmilinBastard]

Bert- “I don’t understand days off. Even on my days off I’m texting people stuff” Wow this guy never stops working.

[@anthonyruiz-carvalho31]

To be fair, that’s probably a lot of the job of a comedian lol

[@AbadonBIack]

@@anthonyruiz-carvalho31 Honestly from everything I've heard from all the comedians, their job is to travel. When they do national or international tours, they could spend like 5 hours a day travelling, a couple hours setting up and doing fan interactions after the show, and then about an hour actually on stage doing material, but they do that everyday for a few months a year, plus 2-6 hours on the weekends doing standup locally in LA and New York when they're not touring. It's definitely not the most demanding job, and most comedians only do 1 new hour every 6 to 12 months, if that. There are comedians like Bobby Lee who probably has 2 hours of material his entire career, and coasts off of that and improv. But they also don't make insane amounts of money. Even super famous comedians like Tom and Bert probably only make 300k-500k, which is rich, but not movie star or musician rich. You could make that much money as an engineer if you worked for the right companies.

[@stillgringo]

@@AbadonBIackTom and Bert are two of the most famous comedians. 2,000 tickets at $50 average price is $100k and they’re probably taking around half of that. Then they’re doing 2-3 shows per night for a few nights in a row. They’re making 300-500k every 2 weeks, not year 😂

[@coleslawYSJ]

@@stillgringo as per Tom's appearance on KFC radio, he's making a surgeon's annual salary, each night of his tour.

[@1Deep43VA]

@@AbadonBIackNot the most demanding compared to labor jobs, but it’s definitely demanding. You live your life on the road. That’s where they make their money. I’m sure some comedians only do sets on weekends, but I bet most are doing way more than that. For the first 10 years, your not even that good and you are barely living hand to mouth.

[@slimypuppet]

I have not drank alcohol in 6 months after drinking everyday for 20 years. Something really good happened and I was having trouble thinking of a reason not to have a drink to celebrate. Then I watched this. Thanks Bert for being a walking talking cautionary tale or reasons not to drink.

[@melissabarmen4918]

Off the rails just like I love, Bert’s on one and Tom just trolls him w out Bert knowing

[@Backcountrybear]

I like how Bert says he hates seeing people give up on dreams

[@bishoponeye4223]

I could watch an entire episode of them commentating over hot air balloon fails 😂

[@Vbridge1013]

As a Wyoming resident, this made me laugh so hard. Please come do shows in Casper.

[@richellemcdonald6466]

I live in Green River. My brother lives in Casper.

[@Swearengen1980]

Casper. Appropriate name for an all white town.

[@nxcess9046]

Gillette 👋 We def need some comedy culture up here

[@Auzz2717]

I second that definitely come to Casper!

[@LonnieHutchinson90]

Bro y’all gotta get back on schedule we need at least one episode a week please 🙏 y’all together are amazing and so damn funny

[@IRomero2Oh]

Bert is slowly turning himself into the Last Iron Lung Survivor😂.

[@TorontoFighter]

Bert reliving his blimp trauma into an ad for BetterHelp - perfect product placement! 🤣

[@TheKeeperOf-Real]

Seriously tho its INSANE that it's taken Bert this long to realize & see himself as what LITERALLY EVERYONE ELSE HAS for years...

[@RyanRants000]

I enjoyed Bert today with Tom. Good episode

[@SiZzLePoPPiN]

The joy on toms face when bert starts getting sick😂😂😂. Now he got both loves of his life* gagging his wife and now bertran

[@andrewcampbell9mm]

What were they eating in the video out of that can

[@mastergwaha]

@@andrewcampbell9mm stromms-ingtheinsh something, look it up, i hear its the worst and yeah no one likes it. why is it made? probably check the wiki too lol

[@clintonleonard5187]

Bert's description of convincing yourself you don't have to throw up was so on point.