My ex broke up with me in February and we’ve have been up and down a lot since the breakup but sometimes we still act like we never split and on some random encounter we would still be intimate but now recently he stopped the intimacy because he wanted to work on our friendship but I saw a hicky on his neck the other night and he lied saying he scraped it in his pool but I wasn’t stupid and then we got in a huge fight about it him saying he’s single and he can be with whoever but at the same time he was still with me I don’t know if this is part of temporary breakups or I’m just the one not moving on so easily because to me I just thought it was to soon because we were struggling so hard in our relationships both communicating and trust were an issue and unfaithfulness. What do you think doc?

Great commentary. You're so mature for your age.

I bkew it. I finally started building trust and connection with my wx ( who is seeing somwone else ) but i aaked him if he saw a future with me after we hung out. I was pushy. He eaid he didn't see a furure. Also my mom sent him a crasy drunk text telling him to stay away from me. I will never forgive her. He asked for space to really move on. I am unable to accept that this happened. Is there still hope ?

What I can't wrap my head around is how they are able to even attempt to connect romantically with someone else so soon? I only tried a casual fling to make me feel better and I felt physically sick because it wasn't my ex. How do they even force the illusion of happiness around someone else like that unless they're a sociopath? I just cannot understand it. I don't even want to be around someone else. As much as they may have this internal conflict, how do they even make it so convincing that they're happy?

Ummm

It's important to difference the soft block and hard block.

Want to come back because the other person is not better than you, simple as that.

Going no contact is not always a bad thing. It helps you keep your dignity intact.

Can u do a video on why your ex revisits activities or places you took them/showed them

Excellent point of view! Finally the first advice about not applying no contact; thank you!!!

Do you have a video about Ex's withholding affectionate behavior, like holding hands or hugging?

... because you made an huge impact on them such as being the best thing since sliced bread. ❤

Good 😂😂😂

When you are getting on fantastic with your DA ex, and she dumps you out of the blue, a week after her telling you she loves you and sadly her oldest friend passing away... (I didn't know she was DA until she dumped me....by text...and I started to do some homework on relationship attachment styles). Telling me to leave her be and not to contact her, and that she was in a bad place. You don't have any choice but to go no contact.

I would say no don't do it, if he has not been in contact with you treating like you don't matter, and you're not a purity in his life

pretty much the same with my ex all the signs are there.. we seem to talk more now than we ever did

Just found your channel, and have drifted off to sleep for two nights listening to your 8 hour videos. Your voice seems made to soothe me into a deep, restful sleep. Many thanks. 💤

?? How do you do this if they want no contact? And why is this only on the perspective of the dumpee? Even if the dumpee does the work, why should it work the second time if the dumper stays the same? It takes two to ruin a relationship...

Is 4 years waiting to long

Wherever you are, Clay, I hope you're okay...

Would this be achievable by writing a letter ?

I’m separated 6 months the with my wife and her chief complaint for why she isn’t back is she believes I’m going to go back on my old ways. Last month reconciliation was on the table as we were hanging out quite a bit. Her mother went through something life threatening and she pulled away about 30 days ago. We went from her saying if we get back together around the end of June she would go on a trip with me then practically overnight we went from flirting to her talking about divorce again. She still pretty angry with me and has reached out to me and started argument over the last month like she’s testing me non stop. I’ve been non reactive while also respectfully asserting my boundaries. Stepped up in every way so much so her entire family is watching everything I do. I’m just going to keep going because it’s like they are waiting for me to screw up because my wife is so sure that I’m faking all my changes.

She says we aren't getting back together, but neither of us have filed for legal separation. She also keeps trying to talk to me, and saying it has to do with our daughter, but really doesn't.

My ex would always say “he doesn’t want to hold me back” “he can’t be in a relationship right now” he broke up with me a year and a half ago. He didn’t want to talk to me or see me anymore but he didn’t fully want to let me go. He sent breadcrumbs and wouldn’t tell me he definitely didn’t want to be with me. He would make excuses not to see me or talk to me instead and say he was too busy and stressed and sick or tired blah blah blah. He was clearly just avoiding me but he was still paying for a lot for me and would send me gifts for holidays and my birthday. Sometimes his breadcrumb texts were flirty and sexual but he wouldn’t see me in person or talk to me other then superficial texts. I finally had to end it on my end (after a year and 2 months of this) and asked him not to contact me anymore unless its important. He went away for a month then but started sending breadcrumb messages again after a month. After 2 months of breadcrumbs and me not replying he has stopped. I am very sad about it, but I don’t want false hope. I feel like he is obviously messed up mentally right now too and confused but I can’t help him if he doesnt want my help and he doesnt want to talk to me. I am sick of being confused as to what he is doing and how he feels about me. I don’t know if he will ever come back to me and want to be serious with me again. I don’t know how I will feel about him at that point if he ever does come back now too because he has pushed me so far away and hurt me so much

I stopped initiating texts as soon as i realized i was just a dopamine hit to them. I took away their crack addiction of constant validation. As a man, if you can't put in the same effort as im putting into you, then I'll unilaterally change the terms and conditions of the relationship. I've done my best, but now you'll get the same as you give. If you think that's petty, then i hope and pray you find a better man 🙏 but dont complain when you realize the grass isn't always greener.

CLAY'S LOW SELF ESTEEM LIKE BUTTON 👇🏾

It’s been 2 years ago and My ex still slanders me on social media and his friends are believing his lies too and they are saying hateful stuff about me and it’s humiliating… I notice his friends stalk my social media just to gossip about me and that’s why I gave up social media

This is excellent

Listening to this tonight… I miss him so much. I wish we was still together…

I and she have been broken up for two months, the 1st month no contact whatsoever. She texted me out of the blue and asked me to come over which I did. She vented out and told me that she was angry and emotional and couldn’t let it go. We hang out almost every day, we go for walks, we eat dinner together, I help her clean her house and we have been texting back in forth on a daily. She tells me that she wants me to be consistent with her and prove to her that I can make changes in my life. She sends me selflessly of herself out of random and it confuses me. The thing that hurt was her telling me that her parents said you’d be stupid to take him back. And she teared up not knowing what that meant. I don’t understand, why would she call me to come to be with her for days straight. Is she playing mind tricks or getting closure from me ?

LOVE THIS! Thanks Clay!!!

My ex was giving me lot of hot and cold sign. Then she finally reach out to me then she started sending me pictures of her sister.after that she Disappear😅. After 5 days she text me that how are you. Then I replied her I am good.then she said take care off yourself.and said me It's my last text i swear 😅🖐️.then I replied to her text takecare of your self.then she read my text and disappear.again

My wife and I have been separated for almost 7 months she still gives me one word answers on texts when applicable lol but will talk on the phone for a hour or more 🥴🤦🏽‍♂️

Hey, What if you guys were physical but plan to meet up to discuss what happened. He keeps saying it was a lesson learned via text but still keeps contacting me.

Smoking pot bru

I was the perfect wife. I did everything to take care of him, cooked everything from scratch (a lot of Mediterranean food), cleaned everything, chores, errands, caregiving. He has Borderline Personality Disorder and diabetes and I took care of him so much. I never complained, never criticized, always told him I appreciate him and I praised him every day. He strangled me. Police separated us. He rebounded with a woman who is the same age as him but looks like she could be his aunty. She seems to be on crystal meth. She also has Borderline Personality Disorder like me. She is married but lies that her marriage is open (the wife disagrees to an open marriage). She comes onto my ex-fiancé and when he turns her down she calls him fat and says she doesn't like him anyways. Now it seems that they have reunited. If she doesn't get her way, she claims abuse, which is just like him. My ex-fiancé does not have the glow he had when he was with me. He looks ill now. He has a psycho look in his eyes. I have PTSD from being strangled. My light has gone out. But yeah the new supply is an epic downgrade

Omg what. I am literallyyyy watching Sailor moon. Right now. Wtfff🤯🤯🤯 crazy.. I call that a synchronicity!! Bc this yesterday I was manifesting a text from my SP and manifesting for them to think abt me. And I listened to manyyy affirmations and videos on manifestation all day. And I dreamed about my SP last night and would’ve you know,, I get a snap from them.🤯🤯 And we’ve been snapping a bit on and off but throughout the day. And it’s sooo insane you mentioned Sailor moon!! And as for other synchronicities, I see their birth sequence, and their full initials on car license plates, and numbers like 333, 777, 111 a lot lately. I believe there is something happening behind the scenes. And I don’t wanna lose heart. Thank you

1. Reaction stage - a narrative they’re creating for themself 2. Reality Stage - they realize they’re overcommitted w/ someone they don’t have an emotional connection with 3. The Reckoning- they realize the rebound isn’t the person they projected them to be, their narrative is crumbling, this is where trouble begins as they realize they’re not better than the ex, it doesn’t mean the rebound relationship will fail, if 2 people choose to stay together they will whether it’s a bad relationship or not 4. The Resolution - not all rebounds end but if they do it happens at this point in all the conflict, they decide to break up or stay together.

Well, if the man ghosted me for several months you should i junp on him once he gives me a tiny hope. Of course i ghost him back. Nevertheless, mostly who started the no contact thazs the culprit they just need to get their karma back

Incredibly childish not to have self reflection.

This can't happen when they dont reach out. And women dont come back after dumping you. They expect you to chase. And you cant pursue someone from a place of strength. My biggest struggle rn is just accepting that i was alone in the relationship and she saw no real value in the 10 years we spent together. I wasted my life

True. Withholding emotions and communication when you need it the most will lead to tears. Give through that a few too many times.

Fool. Women don’t experience guilt. 🙄🤣

None of it matters everybody talks too much. Just get yourself together for the children and go your separate ways and as far as the children are concerned, just letting you know you’re both failed.

I let my ex see me with someone else, he drop me, he knows I love him but he is acting stupid by not coming back

I'm glad my ex saw me with another guy, he drop me last year and blocked me every where, I didn't move on but acted like I did, he had a mad face seeing me with some other guy and kissing him in front of him, power to me it's a challenge to them 🤣

He left me 6 months ago after losing our second pregnancy, always said we were going to get married gave me a promise ring to promise an engagement ring, he never updated his fb status to in a relationship when we were together 1y7m. Told everyone I was his wife. I didn’t care about fb bc we were never on it. Now he has his status changed to engaged. He hasn’t spoken to me since Jan 2 he told me we were never getting back together. I’m crushed bc how can someone do that someone he said would be the only woman for him, the only mother of his children. I felt like I was getting better then seen that I wasn’t stalking somehow my cousin seen his page and told me.. I’m in shock

Nah! Time to move on and flush that turd down the toilet. Ain't worth it.

My ex girlfriend disrespected me via a text. Broke up with her in person, on good terms, 2 weeks later, out of nowhere, she blew a gasket and sent me several texts telling me to "F" off (I think she may have had a few drinks), and that "she was the woman for me", now she's trying to be my buddy. I'm ignoring her, as I DON'T tolerate disrespect. A week later, she apologized, I forgave her, yet still not wanting anything to do with her. Why? I don't tolerate disrespect. Now, I no longer reply to her texts, as I know who she truly is now. Is this what you would do Clay? I'm 66 years old and taking the high road. Curious if most men, in todays world, would tell her to "F' off, or simply continue to ignore. Let me know my friend. TIA.

I am a new subscriber, really like ur content 🥰🙏