I would probably do one of two things. I would rewatch kid movies, or I would go driving and hiking.

I just found you. I am the Shattered Glass System and am poly fragmented. I was diagnosed with DID in 2020 after being lost in the mental health system for 40 plus years. You are so brave to get in front of a camera and tell your story.

How often do you see your counselor at this point. How frequently have you seen a counselor at the beginning versus now?

Very encouraging since I am healing from DID and my husband is also healing. We are learning to care for ourselves. Some days I wonder if our marriage will survive this.

Ty .. I'm terrified.

Im new on this journey...ive used the exact analogy of Charlie Browns teacher....this gives me chills. Thank you.

Thank you. That was very informative.

4 Years late but thank you so much for this. Trying to navigate cptsd and severe dissociative symptoms and this really helped me.

in my late teens and early 20s, i/"i" matter of factly and disconnectedly would talk about all my traumas and... my therapists all thought i was fine and that id moved past it because i could be so frank about it. and im only 27. i get passed over for learning to cope with flashbacks even though i have them, and have said i have them, because im so disconnected that it doesnt feel like its really "me" who went through those things. and its been _every_ therapist ive seen who thinks im past it.

Oh my geez, this is so true. Functional is like... a bare minimum, not an end of the journey goal. Just because the surface of the surface of the pond is calm doesn't mean there isn't something happening beneath the surface.

This aligns with our experience as well; we could talk about our experiences with no emotions to find that later, our system was actually deeply wounded and carrying emotional scars I did not have an awareness of. We were also missed because we showed a lack of distress and were not the most, but "getting by" functional. People assumed we were okay. I believed I was okay. I love you spreading awareness about something like this <3 I strongly believe that if it was more recognised in therapy/mental health services it could help many people that have been missed.

May I ask your opinion on the opposite? When a dissociative client believes they’re fine but the therapist believes that there’s a lot more going on? How do we reconcile that? Love your content- so helpful!

This!!! I can only speak from my experience with the Danish psychiatry, but they don't screen for dissociation here. When I look back at my medical papers and my own journaling, it is so obvious that I was experiencing complex dissociation, but I think only one of my many psychiatrists/psychologists/therapists ever clocked it as that. I was misdiagnosed bipolar, BPD/EUPD, schizotypal or with panic disorder instead depending on the doctor. It's wild they were quicker at giving me antipsychotics instead of screening me for dissociative disorders or PTSD. I even switched to child alters during therapy and my then therapists just asked me to "do the child voice again", which was super humiliating especially because I was scared and didn't even know I had DID yet. Same therapist also told me I couldn't have PTSD, because my flashbacks I reported weren't "real flashbacks", so I thought I must just be overreacting. I left the psychiatry because even after acknowledging they had misdiagnosed me as bipolar when it was trauma, they didn't want to move me to their trauma specific team and wanted me to still get treated by their mood disorder team and take meds that didn't work. I'm so mad how so many doctors could miss my very obvious trauma disorder - especially when they all acknowledged that I had trauma and dissociation, they just thought it wasn't "true PTSD" for some unknown reason. I've heard other trauma survivors in Denmark having similar experiences as me. I really hope people working with psychiatric patients will get more trauma informed, because honestly I think most of the people they see have some degree of trauma and I've read that almost 50% of psychiatric patients struggle with dissociation

Thanks for this video. I am 50, from the UK and late diagnosed autistic/CPTSD and waiting for DID assessment. I am only realizing how I have normalized having a system of parts which influence my mood and behaviours my entire life. I have been educating myself a lot on DID and how it can be very covert. I also feel a huge sense of unreality about my life and the outside world as well as my sensory issues. My functioning in life has been greatly impacted and I am on disability benefits. I can see how I have masked a lot in my life. I also see how I have intellectual memory or bits of memory but no full memory of what happened to me and parts experience the flashbacks.

Glad therapists are coming into a better understanding of this generally, cause it can be real easy to fall through the cracks - Other Jayson

Yup, so learned to cut off emotions

So relate

You might only switch with co consciousness half of a dozen times over a lifetime, and only have half a dozen distinct episodes of prolonged dissociative amnesia (lasting several hours to over a week) that you might think are switches. That happens. But at the other extent you might have past/future periods (as a current) of not even being around most of the time.

You might only switch with co consciousness half of a dozen times over a lifetime, and only have half a dozen distinct episodes of prolonged dissociative amnesia (lasting several hours to over a week) that you might think are switches. That happens. But at the other extent you might have past/future periods (as a current) of not even being around most of the time.

Yes, it’s terrible. It happens daily.

Yes they overreact when their emotions could be checked better to have a Grinch Face than to overreact

Crying…. This broke my heart. So glad you are safe.

You are truly a beautiful soul ❤ these vids help so much. Couldn’t agree more. You need a guide through this . Our T has been a life saver, mean that literally

This was super helpful. We have DID. The way you described needing to pour kindness in the world because you were not able to give it to. Yourself …. I deeply felt this , those are my feelings, it was very empowering hearing you say how we feel. Love your videos. Please know what a kind and beautiful and selfless act it is to share your journey in such an authentic way. ❤

Omgi love u ❤

I don’t know, I’ve been questioning for only a couple months (technically more but that was over two years ago and I forgot) and I don’t know what I would do if I knew I wouldn’t remember- maybe write something down, but that doesn’t always guarantee memory. I guess I’d just go with it. I tend to at least trust myself a decent a amount.

we know were late but youre big help :D

Thanks for sharing with us!

Fusion can be complex because multiplicity and our minds are complex! We hope these confusions with your identity and your life eventually resolve 🥰🤟❤‍🩹

This is so out of touch with actual issues that ppl who are diagnosed struggle with. Dog licking, minor anxiety while shopping....pronouns!?! and you're framing it like 'it's a hard process to fuse maybe ppl don't want it' so alternative is : be in constant pain, dissociated and out of touch, s* ideation and so many more symptoms that are absolute hell because....dog lickings.....and minor anxiety. This isn't a damn joke, what are you even talking about at this point. You miss dissociation cuz of checking out?? Where the nausea and the diziness and amnesia hell that comes with it what are you on about Gianu? I'm sick of this anti-healing rethroic all these 'online DiD systems' promote. Stop it.

Thank you so much for sharing ❤

I just realized it's another way of the perpetrator getting away with absolute ZERO accountability again. It's the "passive voice". There are exceptions like natural disasters, but a lot of the time people seem to be excusing another human being's actions. Like yeah, it did happen for a reason... because a person chose to do those harmful behaviours. F* the passive voice. Appreciate this video.

Good to hear some perspectives.

Oh my geez, this is such a complicated topic. I'm polyfragmented so I end up splitting and fusing quite frequently in my functional multiplicity and you're not always the same as before. You can't always get back to where you were because something changed that caused that split. You just have play it by ear. Regarding fusions, when you try to rapid process and fuse to get back to where you used to be, sometimes it doesn't hold and you can feel it coming apart and you just try again later after you rapid process again. Sometimes you need to process memories in a certain order and also repeat Our biggest frustration with being polyfragmented is that if a split happens, it takes like a month or two to readjust to any new dynamics that have changed after re-integrating.

Wishing you all the best for the process. Fusion is so complicated. ❤❤❤

So relieved it was a good change. Subscribed ❤

I truly respect you for helping to inform people on this disorder.

Make a cool build on minecraft, apparently

Wasn't able to finish the video, but have you looked into dermatillomania? We have it and it's an obsessive Compulsive skin picking condition that can be set off by negative emotions or triggers. It isn't self harm even tho it appears that way sometimes

I relate to the high trigger season bit! 😭❤️❤️ I have a calm place thing I do that helps, and so does the compartmentalizing box acticity 😅

Im gonna have to look into this, cause I already have what feels like dissasociative non epileptic seizures....and it mimics this a bit? It makes me think there is DEFINITELY hope here, cause sometimes I feel like even then as scary as those are I get the sense something can be utilized there? I am now filled with mych more hope, cause EMDR is so hard, but its on the right track. Tai chi for example feels very helpful....so I think my body is storing the stuff physically, which is the worst parts for me. Thanks!

This is very Cate in our system 😂 I swear, people assume that middle alters are automatically more immature or incapable of speaking for themselves. Its not always the case. Cate is very blunt and direct, and doesn't cut corners. She will say what others will not, and it helps us tremendously.

"the inescapability of it" OH. OH OKAY. WOW. THAT MAKES A LOT MORE SENSE NOW. WOW.

Im pretty sure that we have osdd 1b, but its the thoughts that we didnt go through enough trauma, or that it wasnt often enough, or other people had it worse, etc, which have been making us feel so invalid

My answer is idk, chores, survive? Lay low. If there are consequences, then even "good" things like socilizing comes at a cost... because then there's an established bond on their part that I'm expected to uphold and develop on my end and I don’t know how. I don’t know them but they know me, and expect me to continue a conversation that I never had. I suspect I've destroyed a lot of potential connections this way. So that's what we end up doing most of the time. Hiding out.

No idea if I'm onto anything here, but idea for reading numbers out on the phone - if the number's on a computer (rather than paper), you could copy it, then paste it into a google doc, then set the font size to be so big that only one number can fit on each page. And then you could just read one number/page at a time?

Thank youu. My therapist said "it's rare and controversial, so that right there is a reason to think you don't have it." I would like to find someone informed enough to give me a better answer.

I remember when my scab picking started, i was about 6. We have also struggled with hair pulling and nail picking, along with (if i can be real, excessive) intentional SH that was aided by multiple alters who had stuff to work through including myself. Im some 8 months clean from that now because we agreed its time to start finding other ways to be angry, yet we still pick and pull all the time so clearly there is more to address

Thank you for making this video, it's very validating for me. Your voice is very calming.

"I'm not the me who was here a minute ago - I'm still ME" Holy shit... I recently became aware of my DID/OSDD in therapy [also because of a screaming teenage part, but she was mad at the quiet zoned-out part in the driver's seat]. But this quote of yours is... Really breaking through my denial. I thought I was faking because everyone still feels like _me_ - regardless of who's around, I've still lived my life & share most of the same events/experiences. But people online seem like they're so distinct that I didn't count. But, wow... Thank you so much for your content! 💕