10 Deathworld Plagues | Best of r/HFY | 1947 | Humans are Space Orcs | Deathworlders are OP

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00:00 Intro
00:06 Plagues
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Podcast is Called : ASN Humans Are Space Orcs , HFY and other stories
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This Story is Classified as HFY or Humanity Feck, Yea , but what does the Mean?
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HFY is a story/series that takes a “human element” in either humanity or an “other” (race/species or object) that exists in a “setting” (future or other world/universe) with varying levels of culture, technology, society and history that help show in some shape or form the potential good or bad for humanity’s race/culture. In These stories Humans are often referred to as Human, Humanity, Deathworlder, Hellwolder in reference to the human planet of origin , Earth. This planet is seen by most of the universe as a place where only death and chaos can survive.
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Taken from the FAQ of the r/HFY subreddit.
Humans Are Space Orcs (HASO) or Humans Are (Fantasy Race) Are used as a guide when writing.
In these Stories we normally View humans like the other races view orcs in a Fantasy Novel. We (Humans) share the same characteristics and personalities as orcs. Humans are normally treated as the outsiders and barbarians. Humans tend to be underestimated as well in these stories. Unlike Humanity Feck Yea , these don't always put a positive spin on humans\humanity sometimes looking at the darker side of human and humanity from the perspective of aliens.
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Lord Azrekahl

[@calvingreene90]

Never start an atrocity contest with somebody who's afraid of what they are capable of doing.

[@vexxen8232]

this is hella understated

[@doctorbright1065]

Xenos: *use list of war crimes as a to-do list.* Humans: "COWABNGA IT IS THEN!"

[@UsernotFound2018]

Xenos: To do list Humans: ITS A FUCKING WHOELD WIDE GAME SHOW!

[@chrisdufresne9359]

When you force us to break out the old Testament for viable strategies, you messed up. Using the Rules of War as a checklist is one great way to drive us to vengeance. The calling upon of biblical punishments was likely the nicest option we had.

[@josephaskins1996]

Yes, take glee in committing the acts we have banned, with reckless abandon, without thought for why we would hate these acts and ban them if we had never inflicted them on ourselves. Honestly, they got off lightly, only 7 worlds, out of dozens we could have done this to, if they'd truly checked off much of the Geneva convention, total war protocol gets enacted, and there are no holds barred. We are a merciful bunch for not doing all we could have done, for good men/women enact total war, and still then hold themselves back, so that they maintain some of their soul.

[@mcarrowtime7095]

Ironically, the trend for humanity is that there will be few to no Christians by the time we reach space. Meeting other creatures would most definitely kill the feeling of being special that makes most Christians believe

[@chrisdufresne9359]

@MC arrowtime I think that the religion itself would be changed upon first contact. The religions of the world tend to change when paradigm shifts occur and first contact would definitely be one such shift.

[@alithanar8]

There is never an atheist in a foxhole - Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams

[@kyriss12]

@NoChill To be fair half the suggestions one the Geneva checklist only exist because nobody even thought that shit was possible before ww1. To quote a certain fat electrician, “it’s never a war crime the first time”

[@condorboss3339]

Gives a different meaning to 'going biblical.'

[@riverraven7359]

The aliens are lucky they didn't see the pillar of fire too. Walking a capital-ship grade lance battery over a continental bombardment would stick in the memory.

[@barelyasurvivor1257]

True that.

[@GeorgeOrwell-yz6zx]

@@riverraven7359 Another option is the Rods of God. They are 20 ft long and 1 foot in diameter made of tungsten. It hits with the force of a small nuke but leaves no residual radiation

[@alicorn3924]

@@GeorgeOrwell-yz6zx then put a nuke on it for radiation, if we're gonna break some rules, why not break the orbital weapons rule as well

[@CT-1035]

Would have loved to see humans make a Halo ring with eyes built onto the side while it screams “BE NOT AFRAID”

[@ixisnyx6860]

I like how this story opens with "We heard about your war crimes and decided to do some of them for the lols." and ends with "Why are you hurting us like this you monsters?!" My dude, you started this shit. You don't get the luxury of playing the victim now.

[@Lumberjack_king]

Exactly they Said rules of war were stupid so we acted accordingly

[@derekbroestler7687]

Reminds me of a Terran regional saying popular where I'm from, "My door was locked for YOUR protection, not mine."

[@AlexSDU]

'MURICA!

[@flamestardragon7962]

​@@AlexSDU google translated that into the word kill just for the record

[@smaragdwolf1]

@@flamestardragon7962 not far from the truth ;D

[@rolandosada8077]

Nice… yes I have to have a sign made.

[@itsmootdamnitnotmute905]

The closing paragraph. Frickin' perfect.

[@redraptorx1066]

aliens: LET'S BREAK EVERY RULE THE HUMANS HAVE FOR WAR! human: i alredy know i'm going to hell, i just want god to hesitate when i get to him.

[@ufoe20011]

Naw. If i am going to hell. The devil better pray i am in a good mood when i get there.

[@njennett8005]

That's what I want. I want God to do a double take. When he sees me. And I want to have some words with the big man.

[@Speed001]

​@njennett8005 namely a 4 and then 3 letter word, then maybe "I'm sorry, treat them well."

[@generalx13]

"When I meet God will he damn me for my crimes or congratulate me for following his example." Damn that is a heavy line.

[@radioactiveassassin5218]

I think god is supporter of "Do as I say, not as I do." rule.

[@smaragdwolf1]

"I am become Death, Destroyer of Worlds" is another fitting line out of History.

[@duanesamuelson2256]

​@@smaragdwolf1that's actually a misquote

[@duanesamuelson2256]

Old or new testament?

[@Angl0sax0nknight]

That one was rather deep. Humanity as a whole can be very charitable, but there is a darkness that if not controlled could turn us into demons that nature would abhor.

[@timothyswanson8773]

There are three things a wise man fears. 1. The ocean in a storm. 2. A moonless night. 3. The anger of a gentle man.

[@ThomasTee]

Deamons run when good man go to war.

[@gamervox1707]

we are only human in both positive and negative. demon bah we are the one who chose out of the some mental people.

[@kmrose4741]

"When I meet God, will he damn me for my crimes, or congratulate me for following his example" DAMN. AUDIBLY GASPED AT THAT. HOLY SHIT!!!!

[@Chokah]

Every time I hear a story like this I think of "Good men don't need rules "

[@DepressedCrow]

Now is not a good time to learn why we have so many rules

[@danijelandroid]

"I'm a good man but not that good"

[@TheStarMachine2000]

It reminds me of the quotes "if we were ruled by angels, we would have no need for laws" and "a nation gets the government it deserves"

[@TheStarMachine2000]

@@DepressedCrow love your profile picture by the way. Still haven't beaten it myself, but I do love the game

[@DepressedCrow]

@@TheStarMachine2000 :) I'm still trying to get through the shaded citadel

[@ZoruaZorroark]

terrans are monsters, they know it too, thus why the terrans have "rules of war", basically why it's a bad idea to have them to start disregarding those rules

[@nathanielhill8156]

There's an amazing quote from Dr. Who, you've probably heard it by now. *villain monologue about the extremes the doctor went to and how he's supposed to be a 'good man'* The doctor responds "Good men don't need rules. Today is not the day to find out why I have so many."

[@jnorth3341]

To be historically accurate, there was actually little fire at Hiroshima and Nagasaki, now, Tokyo and Dresden, those were some fires for the history books.

[@geoshark12]

Idk the sun is pretty firey

[@superzomb2123]

Jhon?

[@duanesamuelson2256]

Dresden had an affect named for it: the Dresden effect for when ghe air is so hot it burns

[@kirkjones9639]

Look at it this way. In the Marines, when the Geneva suggestions were brought up, it was noted, That It is Never A War Crime the First Time.

[@UsernotFound2018]

Que?

[@kirkjones9639]

@@UsernotFound2018 Celar, Celans, Mortalis.

[@kanecabral4499]

The fat electrician speaks the truth

[@Deadxman616]

There isn't a Convention if there isn't a Geneva.... ~Human proverb

[@batreopr8dman]

The Most terrible plague... Grape Kool-aide.

[@WiredTurkey316]

Space diabetes

[@Maddog3060]

Reminds me of something I read once: "The bars in a zoo aren't there to protect the tiger." The xenos just realized that they are not the tiger.

[@ThW5]

Actually, the bars are, at least the ones keeping the HUMANS away from the cage are...

[@TheLazyComet]

When i remembered that these were the plagues we recite on Passover, i was just waiting to see how they handled the frogs. bit of a shame that part didnt work

[@Deconstruction_Administrator]

I was thinking a Dyson Swarm could be viable for blacking out the sun.

[@stevenswenson7041]

@@Deconstruction_Administrator I would think Nano particulate soot spread in outer atmosphere would do it .

[@jakeand9020]

You would think one xeno would stop and think to themselves "WHY do they require rules for war?" Rather than just thinking it a silly concept, which it is, if you don't think about it.

[@Evileex]

How about some Pulp Fiction? "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee."

[@garyk1480]

Aliens - break every Geneva Convention to bring them down Humans - Officers - DON'T hold your troops back or stop them from doing anything.........

[@Mydumbselfsays]

The phrase "When I meet God, will he damn me for my crimes, or congratulate for following his example?" really hits deep. God is seen as the ultimate good but most of the atrocities ever seen by mankind was made by him.

[@taitano12]

Well... Sometimes you have to do something awful to accomplish something good. It's a debatable concept that is perfectly illustrated by things like this story; especially how the loudest debate over whether it is right or wrong comes from within. From The Ten Plagues to the A-Bomb, when someone good goes to war, they get desperate to end it as soon as possible for as long as possible. I imagine that last line implies that she's feeling suicidal for what she's done to achieve peace.

[@radioactiveassassin5218]

I think god is supporter of "Do as I say, not as I do." rule.

[@sirfenixxumbra6626]

just like hittler? are you sane?@@taitano12

[@epsome13]

The xenos never get it. The rules are in place for their protection and to limit the suffering.if we truly embrace total war we are the truest form of demon in the galaxy.their nightmares are our day time sitcom.

[@calvingreene90]

The question is how long will it take for the reduced suffering from the rules of War being enforced galactically to balance out the suffering and death in teaching the lesson.

[@UsernotFound2018]

That is gonna take a LOOONG time when People forget how to make muster gas

[@geoshark12]

@@UsernotFound2018 thats not going to happen because its the same process that allows us the grow our food in the quantities we do

[@marionette8739]

@soldumproductions8174 wow, you clearly neither researched toxic gas, nor listen to Sabaton! Literally listen to Father. Like the other commentor said, Fritz and Haber came up with the method to mass produce ammonia, which was used both to make fertilizer for mass production of crops, as well as chlorine gas, which was used in the Great War. We as humans research something, make a discovery, and then ask ourselves how to kill another motherfucker with it... or even a *lot* of motherfuckers. That's just the way we are, and it isn't changing anytime soon, as long as science continues the way it has. Hell, the rocket started off as a weapon platform before a method of transportation, and same thing with computers. I seriously don't understand why anyone thinks humanity is going to lose that edge anytime ever.

[@samboyd1828]

if it's a good, lasting lesson? never

[@theimperial5368]

damn this guys don't fuck around lol, the ambassador remind me of makima.

[@normiesalvador1854]

She was truly made in the Old Testament God's image.

[@wrathshorts2894]

They are brutal. With out mercy. But you. You will be worse. Rip, and tear. Until it is DONE.

[@wildwikedwanderer1208]

God will congratulate the children he created. The almighty will welcome her into his angels so that she may help bring his wrath down upon other who are found wanting.

[@superspicy8740]

Just what I was thinking since Christians follow (or at the very least claim to follow) Jesus’ example so why would it be wrong to follow the example of Jesus’ Father

[@TeamPomme]

She will get a job as the horsewoman of Pestilence

[@Sorain1]

Someone needs to do the dirty jobs after all.

[@GR3YD3ATH]

kind of describes us when we want a future we make rules to stop ourselves... god help us when we don't care anymore.

[@wilfredrainey2186]

I really felt something hearing this story and I am not sure what or how or how I feel about it. Thank you for the amazing reading.

[@Renegadebane]

Let me get a nanobots and zombie virus and make it a double.

[@KroMagnum4]

Beware the fire haired woman with a glass vial.

[@NovaGirl8]

They made a zombie plague a la Resident Evil?

[@changeling6450]

I think that was a space rabies or something like that, just imagine the level of madness that a space rabies could do

[@zotaninoron3548]

No. They bluffed a zombie plague. Then drank it as a cocktail.

[@ClockworkCrow7]

It sounds more like the plagues of Egypt a la the Story of Moses. Water to blood, boils, itching to bleeding, livestock dying en masse, burning hail (napalm) and the failed frogs & blackening of the sun. The only thing missing is the angel of death. But it looks like they had a zombie plague in stock.

[@superspicy8740]

@@ClockworkCrow7he line of “Thus saith the Lord” is could also be a reference to the song from the film Prince of Egypt & not just the Bible

[@donaldscholand4617]

Yeah, vodka can do that, or so I've heard. (Or was it Tequila?)

[@GuukanKitsune]

We got BIBLICAL on their asses.

[@julesmasseffectmusic]

Aliens started a who can hit softer competition and found out if you win you actually lose, badly.

[@UsernotFound2018]

I count it as a win

[@lulu111_the_cool]

@@UsernotFound2018 losing multiple worlds and also really high reputation?

[@jnachtig2]

You know 100% they have projects working on the blackened sun and frog issues. I mean if don’t have all 7 it’s not really perfect.

[@ThomasTee]

Ah, Objecitve Campaign. One of my favorite wordsmiths.

[@cgrw1]

"When I meet God, will he damn me for my crimes, or congratulate me for following his example?" outstanding.

[@vladchrono8347]

Man it would nice to have a continuation on the Viken side.

[@Amoth_oth_ras_shash]

hmm... honestly.... the blood ocean feels more fitting for sekhmet .....once war incarnate is enraged nothing can slake its rage... only what appear to be a lake of blood . that in reality is beer can trick it to sleep and ...calm... yet still smoldering in the heart all ...... ''lesser monster not caring for all the suffering outside the window'' ...well , sweet little alien , good good indeed leet thy mind strike the thought.. what pray tell doth thee think those rules thy called ..silly.. where there to guard agenst hmm ? you mocked the wardens holding the chains to the beast of war... now bathe in its shadow as it relishes to pour all the blood thirst , ferocity , cruelty its wards minds can handle into ther hearts to ..inspire.. them but also... yes thats a nice twist end , as blood thirsty as a pack beast can be to defend its kin... or keep breeding grounds out of monsters grip... its empathy runs just as deeply

[@fissshy7]

people forget that the rules of war isn't for fairness it's for self preservation if you break these rules, then they can break these rules. And believe me. Someone can break them harder.

[@skelepunner745sans5]

To force a human to play God is terrible thing indeed

[@graeme2418]

Aw yes. The very epitome of HYY.

[@seanrobert9661]

[documented contact]

[@seanrobert9661]

bad move, REDACTED counter play.

[@dragonlord498]

one idea i had recently would be a "horror" story based around humans terraforming planets to be suitable for their habitation which basically results in each world they colonize into some form of death world with relatively high gravity and various other such things as well as how the groups that are in charge of making and creating the flora and fauna for such worlds to be somewhat creative with what they populate them with from normal earth plants and animals to extinct species like dinos to things inspired by our myths and stories

[@jnachtig2]

Her aide probably turned to the Xeno aid and said “Redheads, am I right?”

[@queen-lilyorjiako268]

When I heard "Thus saith the lord" all I could think of was the 10 plagues song from Prince of Egypt

[@Phyrior]

That was the idea.

[@lloydkeith3061]

The enemy sets the edges of depravity for a conflict. Only the foolish will push a game of one upmanship in war crimes

[@lord1todd]

FTA! Another perfectly narrated amazing short story.

[@macpurdy]

For the algorithm and the narrator.

[@allenmorgan1007]

For the Algorithm, for the Author(s), for the Disembodied Voice!

[@Vulture-1066]

OOOH, this was a good one!!!

[@C.f.b._entertainment-thepeps]

Bruh she freaking lied to the aliens 🤣🤣🤣

[@barelyasurvivor1257]

Fantastic Narration

[@geoshark12]

The thing that seems extremely cruel but was definitely a safety measure was killing the survivors m and burning the planet, making sure that the plagues never got off the planets and that they were all destroyed with fire

[@ceu160193]

That's probably main downside of bioweapons - they can be very hard to control.

[@Lumberjack_king]

12:11 she finally gets it those rules were for your safety not ours they were to hold us back

[@xavierzaxavier5873]

now i need to know to what crime did these xeno do for human "Ok, that its i have enough" i just too curious is the crime Xeno do on low level, mid level or high level crime? Clearly no on exterminate level.....😂😂😂😂😂as human still try talk and reason with these xeno....

[@sovietpowersupereme6231]

They thought warcrimes as a 'check list' So i assume they went from the least despicable to the most despicable.

[@theraptorstalon7589]

🎶🎵(Thus saith the Lord x4) since you refuse to free my people; (Thus Saith the Lord x2) All through the land of Egypt; I send a pestilence and plague into your house, into your bed, into your streams, into your streets into your drink, into your bread; upon your cattle, upon your sheep and oxen in your fields, into your sleep, into your dreams; UNTIL YOU BREAK, UNTIL YOU YIELD!; I send the swarm, I send the hoard, Thus saith the Looooooord!🎵🎶

[@Sorain1]

Absolutely the most chilling thing ever put in animation. Love that song and the work they did.

[@bigjay875]

Excellent story! The speaker of this story also did an excellent job bring it to life👍

[@willgallatin2802]

As long as the other xeno's don't call the bluff, it's all good.

[@wayneargo5904]

Are we sure it was a bluff, seems to me that if they went this far already they might as well go the full mile.

[@jakeand9020]

Bluff? Depends on how you look at it I suppose, but how many worlds need to burn before it's not a "bluff?" Sure, they went above and beyond for the demonstration, unleashing all the plagues at once, however that would hardly be necessary if forced to continue. And don't think for a moment we wouldn't obliterate Earth before seeing it seized by aliens.

[@Gloop_Anderson]

That end thought.

[@kyleduell2577]

Awesome

[@artandstuff9026]

When aliens cosplay Canadians in WWII lol

[@jacksonforgo]

You're bluffing! *drinks from the skulls of her enemies*

[@lumberluc]

Ever heard of the 10 Plagues of Egypt? Congrats! We gave it to you!

[@WiredTurkey316]

A good man doesn't need rules. Don't ask me why I have so many.

[@erushi5503]

You really wonder what the Xenos were thinking when they did their atrocities and imagine how bad they are for a person to sacrifice their grace(soul) just to teach the idiots their mistakes.... for the algorithm

[@KouuToriProductions]

Geneva Suggestions.

[@Bikerbob59]

Good story.

[@angrydragonslayer]

quite neat

[@mikeharris6429]

This is how you deal with people trying to fuck around. If you commit such extreme violence upon anyone who tests you then no one will want to. Edit: annnd the author fucks it all up by making the woman a bleeding heart instead of someone completely justified in their actions.

[@TheCoffeehound]

YEeeaaah, you're wrong on that. It was all humanity could do in order to hit those worlds, so they did a terror campaign on them. It was calculated and cold blooded. The human ambassador wasn't weak. She did what was necessary, even though it turned her stomach. You can feel justified, but still disgusted by what you HAD to do. People who don't feel that way are usually in jail or a mental institution.

[@SH-qs7ee]

​@@TheCoffeehound Yeah, I'm pretty certain we do not want a leader who can order such things and have a clear conscience about it after.

[@thegingergent1337]

My only complaint, why does it always have to be gingers that are the crazy ones?

[@gregmchurch]

@@Deadxman616 I almost married one one.....

[@RealArcalian]

Greetings Mentlegent! For the Rhyhtm that is Algo Humans GET BIBLICAL!

[@Hellsong89]

6:59 Its shame i was not in that strategic meeting, i have few wonderful ideas for that, like setting few drill bombs if there was any volcanic action to volcanos to set them up and maybe have capsule of fine particles inside to increase amount of light ash particles in upper atmosphere causing sun be blocked and temperature to plummet. Though better (for planets later use) would been just bring in dyson sphere and block the sun, to harness it and then output all that energy to single point like volcano to super heat it and cause eruption, or slap flies out of the sky, in form of fleeing enemy ships. 10:09 Dear ambassador why do you think human lexicon has its own dedicated term of "scorched earth" and "genocide"? This would not been first or last time we apply such tactics against our enemies and that is just prelude.. if this was bit much for you, imagine methods of war that are rare even to us that do not have YET their own dedicated term...but i'm getting bored of these peace talks, maybe war is really more interesting alternative and we get to stretch our creativity and imagination once again witch would be fun, since we havent done that in ages. So are you agreeing our generous peace terms or shall i go tell my kind that you still dont get it and to let loose the dogs of war?

[@pheonexking1218]

I am pretty sure than we would rather do a scorched earth policy against letting aliens have our world

[@peterhacke6317]

scorched earth? we would incite our sun to go nova prematurely, if those xenos dare to siege terra!

[@YeOldeTraveller]

The term of art is Unrestricted Warfare. The comments about the rules and bars below are apt. They are NOT for our protection.

[@genericuser984]

cool

[@michaelyoung7261]

Yikes. Reminds me of the acts of domestic terrorism that I thought up during a high school shooter lockdown drill. Three different methods that would cause more chaos and pain, actual terror, if I actually put them to practice. It’s a good thing that I would refuse to actually do anything like it.

[@LikeZoinksGangWay]

Amen

[@oskargiza7251]

WOW!!!

[@merlinwizard1000]

5th, 7 January 2023

[@syahdanzahari5681]

👍

[@Zminator1986]

Of course send the red head to show off how soulless humanity can be 🤣

[@FakeDelTaco]

This human woman is fecking insane.

[@klappstock943]

For the Algorithm the story and the voice

[@nachoakajrod]

👌mama Mia thatsa good👌

[@flashink6437]

KZbin gave me the option to translate this

[@nachoakajrod]

@@flashink6437 🤣🤣🤣

[@michelelyons9410]

The parade of atrocity are a bit much.

[@asandrewsilvaw]

For the algorithm

[@elfeater1760]

For the Algorithm11!

[@tonyneal910]

🔥👏👏👏👏👏👍🐿

[@Speed001]

Poor woman

[@user-sf1wr2zb8v]

W woman

[@potatoplaza6967]

The Waffle house has found it's new host

[@smc912]

WTF did I just read? this is why I don't read/listen to hfy stories anymore. they've become the most self aggrandizing and zenophobic stories ever. they used to be fun and entertaining stories but not they are just made by and for a bunch of edge lords who think that wiping out whole planets worth of populations is the good and just thing to do. An eye for an eye does not apply to all circumstances. The point of this story seems to be that humanity is super barbaric and needs to be held back from commiting war crimes. which is a super bleak way of looking at our species by the way. So what do the humans do in this story? They break there own rules! Like wtf

[@pummipeikko6641]

👍