17 Rants in 4 Minutes

In which Hank rants about seventeen different things that bug him. To be clear, this is not healthy and I kinda wish I hadn't done it because I was stressed out for the whole day after I filmed it. But, yeah, this stuff seriously annoys me. The rants are as follows:
1. American Cheese is not Cheese
2. 90% Fat Free means 10% Fat
3. Everything is Chemicals
4. All-Natural Does Not Mean "Good For You"
5. Public restroom toilet paper
6. WIPE UP YOUR PEE!
7. Uberfans...stop hating on enthusiastic noobs
8. USE YOUR TURN SIGNAL!
9. GIF can be pronounced either way
10. SLOW KETCHUP
11. KETCHUP PEE
12. Having to sneeze but not sneezing
13. Tangled headphone cables
14. Headphone chord in the chair wheel
15. "Gay" as an insult
16. Complaining about complaining because we have it so good.
17. "Have you scanned your club card."

[@papaya1551]

"You passive aggressive robot sack of ketchup pee! GAH!" Best Hank Green quote ever.

[@papaya1551]

OMG! 40 likes?! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!

[@KarateShotokanKid1]

papaya1551 What's better is that a guy just below you commented the exct same thing and you both have the same number of likes!

[@heyyyy8918]

😂😂😂

[@coena9377]

I agree that “gay” is an extremely lame and immature insult. Instead, I like to use “passive aggressive robot sack of ketchup pee”.

[@TheSquigy]

It's a modern Shakespeare insult

[@FyreHeartStudios]

I'm crying. Like, literally, crying. 😂

[@Mgdr2011]

Ketchup pee!!!

[@yokab]

Man, we need more of Hank ranting on stuff.

[@LucasBenderChannel]

So glad that 7 years later, we have Hank on TikTok.

[@sara-ww8eq]

+

[@Lyw1234567890]

I've watched 3:37 7 times already and the "GAH" at the end just keeps getting funnier

[@orbemsolis]

Lisa Wang XD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

[@nathandaniel5451]

Lisa Wang 3:40

[@orbemsolis]

hills nathan love that

[@LOLzim2good4u]

Lisa Wang Bless you for point that out. I don't even know why it's that funny.

[@truboo4268]

+Lisa Wang I really wanna use that insult.

[@ericwinter2083]

EVERYTHING IS CHEMICALS

[@alexpayne4582]

what about the contents of a vacuum (which is nothing btw if u didn't know)

[@jemimamurphy4061]

alex payne a vacuum isn't a 'thing', the actual definition of a vacuum is 'nothing' ["a space devoid of matter"] which you just stated. In brackets. As a side note. Therefore your point is moot. And stupid.

[@ericwinter2083]

Jemima Murphy he probably watched like 2 physics documentaries and now thinks he has his phd in physics

[@alexpayne4582]

Jemima Murphy but you said everything and if there is something for it to be considered existent like the vacuum of space then yes a vacuum is a thing whether devoid of matter or not it still exists unless you want to leave a space station with no suit on so yes it is a thing in existence and I remind you 'everything thing in existence is a chemical'

[@jemimamurphy4061]

alex payne A vacuum isn't a thing in existence though! That's the point! Hahaha please google this before commenting any more! It's not "the vacuum of space" it's "space is a vacuum" - it is a word used to describe nothing, as words are a human institution you can't expect every descriptive word to be a physical thing, you know? I know you are trying and I don't want to come across as rude I'm honestly attempting to be helpful, it's genuinely interesting though, so do google it.

[@rachelferguson2376]

'You passive aggressive robot sack of ketchup pee! GAH!' *laughs* Get's me every time! :D

[@abigailagan7931]

Hahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa.....hilarious!

[@stormcloudsabound]

dftba's got a shirt of it now. not sure if it's still on sale but dude, it's great :)

[@CrayonOlay]

i'm gonna store this insult for use later...xD

[@moviemadness2009]

I was eating when he said that. I nearly lost myself. :P

[@hello_olivia_here]

Laurie Pavero me too, ohmygosh

[@aireannawachal5326]

number seven is my favorite. just because I don't know every single little tiny thing of that fandom.....doesn't mean I "don't deserve to even know about it" or I" am not really a fan at all. just a wannabe"

[@metallsnubben]

Indeed, would not an interest in deepening ones knowledge of a subject be pretty central to the definition of a "fan", and would that not mean that one had stuff left to learn?

[@saaargummm1868]

I'm so ashamed I used to be that person who believed that not knowing everything means you are not a real fan.

[@geepersweepers3184]

I agree. Besides, at one point off and start off as people who don’t know much about the fandom. I don’t think it makes sense that a person who had been a friend longer is making fun of another person was in the same situation they were before.

[@marthawilkinson3238]

For some reason im fine with other people being new/not knowing a lot about a fandom(even excited about educating them about it) but do I hold myself to the same standard/expectation? Ha! Nono which is why I have to watch every single vlogbrothers video chronologically before I can start watching their current ones and calling myself a proper fan🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

[@heyysimone]

I LOVE the part about not knowing every single detail of something youre a fan of. Everyone starts out not knowing, it doesnt make them less of a fan. And some people also dont have memories as good as others. I can quote the entire film Juno, it doesnt mean that i like it more than my sister does though.

[@HouseMDaddict]

heyysimone I feel like it's boring if you know every detail of something. I personally like discovering new things about something of which I am a fan. It's like a neverending puzzle where pieces connect sometimes!

[@MrZAP17]

+heyysimone It's also that people have different strengths. I'm a Star Wars fan. I've been a Star Wars fan for a long time, and in that time I've both accumulated a ton of trivia knowledge and met a lot of other Star Wars fans. I can tell you all about the extras in the cantina scene, or the history of the Sith, or the galactic geography, but if you ask me to quote the films word for word, or even a full scene at any point in any of the movies? I can't do that. I've never been able to do that, because my memory doesn't work that way (and also I don't see the point in making the effort). But I can introduce you to people who can, or who know more about other things than I do. The idea that to be a fan you need to know EVERYTHING about your chosen fandom is ludicrous, especially when there's so much information to go through and when most people are honestly a fan of more than one thing anyway.

[@Pile_of_carbon]

If I tried to talk as fast as Hank I'd probably faint because I wouldn't have time to breathe. How the hell does he do that? xD

[@user-dt4mi5ye6y]

Jump cuts. It's not like he sits and does this whole video in one take. It's probably the most used editing tool on KZbin.

[@Pile_of_carbon]

WireDxEntitY Even with the jump cuts, he still talks pretty damn fast. =P

[@renoloverxoxo]

It's because of the 4 minute time limit.

[@christianloper9483]

Eh, it's not that hard. You've just got to get your blood flowing. D:

[@JasonVaysberg]

He might speed up the video slightly to get under 4 minutes without it being noticeable too.

[@EiferBrennan]

I die laughing every time Hank calls the "U-Scan" a "Passive Aggressive Robot Sack of Ketchup Pee!".

[@lizs.3130]

GAH!!!!

[@minefilms1122]

XD

[@robertofontiglia4148]

He... says that once. Just the one time... Or do you watch this in a loop ?

[@coglineerro730]

#PassiveAggressiveRobotSackOfKetchupPee

[@DaveGaming99]

Charlie Grant GAH

[@Tailikku1]

#GAH

[@gracehopps2009]

Passive Aggressive Robot Sack Of Ketchup Pee Iconic. If you make this into a t-shirt I will buy 3 of them over the course of my lifetime.

[@issy1386]

thank you for introducing us all to the phrase 'diabolical turd face'. That's amazing.

[@irellyvant]

i have watched this so many times and somehow hank being unbelievably frustrated and angry brings me so much joy

[@LibertyLikes]

EVERYTHING IS CHEMICALS!

[@bentschirhart249]

ARVYTANG AHZ KAMIKLES

[@martysue3704]

Victory Nepeta JHA JHA, CTHULU PHFTHAGN!

[@bentschirhart249]

AZSXDCFVGBHNJ XESCDRFVTBGHUN ED5HUIJ CDRTFVYGBU ®Í≈ΆÇÏ©√ÁıÓ¨˚√ÔÇÏ˚†¨

[@LibertyLikes]

Oh dear God what have I started

[@bentschirhart249]

ARVYTANG AHZ NOT NOT KAMIKLES?

[@pantopia3518]

Is there a way to down load "PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE ROBOT SACK OF KETCHUP PEE ... GAH". ?

[@claired5829]

The GAH killed me

[@jefferygiraffe2668]

There needs to be a shirt made.

[@keokiracerhalsteren]

cant choose name I have the seperate clip here, just go to keepvid or something like that to download it :) kzbin.info/www/bejne/pKvTeZVura5sjc0

[@FuzzballZebrakinz]

cant choose name I made it a gif! kzbin.info?v=xV_4EA-wrPc&g=RURkv4NXY9s

[@claired5829]

Fuzzball Zebrakinz you are the savior, god bless you

[@deathsheir2035]

Actually, it is a good idea to let out your anger every once in a while. Short term, versus long term effects. The short term of letting out your anger, is you get angrier, however, the long term, you feel better. Where not letting out anger, short term, you seem like a nice happier person, but the long term you'll just become an angry person with uncontrollable spouts of rage.

[@jasminewang6690]

"ye passive aggressive robot sack of ketchup pee" Shakespearean insult of the century

[@PaulLaPorteJr]

...Just shake up the squeezable ketchup bottle, man.

[@TheInfamousBertman]

This was my only problem with the video. Shake the bottle = no ketchup pee.

[@jangwoo24]

I love it when Hank goes insane in 3:32

[@ajmorgan3420]

no, in 3:40

[@ajmorgan3420]

GAH!

[@FullElectronOrbital]

Hank, one rage every three months is permitted. Just try not to hurt anyone who doesn't deserve it.

[@eggtart2290]

Best insult: Passive Aggressive Robot Sack of Ketchup Pee

[@playme676]

GAH!

[@WhimsicalBlades]

I have had a very stressful and draining day today. Watching random vlogbrothers videos might be the only thing at this moment that can make me feel good. Thank you both for being awesome and reminding me the world is bigger than myself. Also, "passive aggressive robot sack of ketchup pee... GAH!" always makes me laugh, so thanks, Hank. I know you probably won't see this but I just wanted to express my exhausted and stressed out gratitude for what seems like the only bit of genuine, untainted enjoyment I've had all day.

[@Datalore2371]

1:30 I have had "IT'S YOUR PEE AND SOMEONE IS GONNA HAVE TO CLEAN IT UP" play in my head literally EVERY time I've used the bathroom for the last 6 years So thanks, Hank. The toilet seat is always cleaner after I use it thanks to you.

[@chocolateer8907]

10 years later and I came back here to say this! Hank has made the world a better place in a lot of big ways but also in a lot of little ways

[@mikedavey1996]

Eating a tub of lard while watching a Firefly marathon. That's probably a thing.

[@Awesomeness2728]

Oh my god this is the hardest I've laughed in months. *EVERYTHING IS CHEMICALS!!*

[@meghanhaynes4279]

Water, your body, omega 3 fatty acids, raspberries, EVERYHING

[@tiffanyrosejenks3963]

Me too. Thank you Hank Green

[@AliztheAwesom1]

PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE ROBOT SACK OF KETCHUP PEE is my new go to insult.

[@ascott741]

10 years late and no one is mentioning the dolly zoom at 3:03!!!!!!!!! That was chef's kiss

[@jamessanders6750]

I want "Everything is chemicals" on a t-shirt.

[@jbkjbk1999]

But Hank! if you shake the bottle before you use it, you dont get the pink ketchup piss!

[@randomgirll3123]

I showed my cousion the part about using gay as an insult. She called you gay I yelled "immature and stupid", and I got yelled at... :I I hate social convention...

[@zingeuron5094]

Don't worry. 40 years from now when people use f*g or gay (in an insulting way) people will look at them like they said n-------.

[@randomgirll3123]

It bugs me so bad though...

[@geekgirl5675]

I have watched this video so many times. It was the video that introduced me to vlogbrothers and it has forever been my favorite.

[@thepip3599]

It's funny how when you're writing a comment, it says "share your thoughts" but you can post nothing but a space, and it will work.

[@thepip3599]

[@kynigosthewolf4573]

The Pip

[@ActionLandFilms]

Was that your only thought

[@Bearsca]

Some people's thoughts are nothing more than a single space ...

[@remyratatouille9928]

I LOOVVE THIS!!! My friend and I quote it waay to often!

[@lydiamcroberts9576]

I'm that friend aren't I??

[@remyratatouille9928]

Yes Lydia, you are! You diabolical terdface! (I kid, I kid)

[@Account-go7lv]

This is your primal scream

[@ColorPixie81]

I love this channel. I am new to the channel, and I found it due to the Fault in Our Stars. I'm not ashamed to admit it. Hank, you are hilarious!! Keep being awesome!!

[@ashleycasey2093]

I've never seen a nerd this angry,since that nerd got into a fight about religion with a christian.

[@Roma-kp4qg]

Bill Nye?

[@forsagebone]

Watching Hank freak out has got to be one of the best things in this world XD

[@ajmorgan3420]

If you ask a friend over, DON'T TELL THEM TO WAIT WHILE YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES!

[@darkroselight3835]

Every now and then I come back here for the boost of serotonin.

[@yogurtfluff1]

LOL! The best insult for a self serve checkout ever.

[@maggiemiller3174]

The fact that hank years later would call American his favorite cheese, referencing its wigglyness, is character growth.

[@TerryBadger]

You need your own TV station 24/7 ...

[@mimikechan]

I just bwafflesnorted my way through this :3 I am in total agreement with the device for indicating your intention to turn, seems to be an optional extra on a lot of cars these days. Good rant a* would watch again.

[@monineath8490]

I hate people who can't understand that not everybody comprehends things the same way as they do. Dear delinquent friends: if you see this, please stop punching me. It really freaking hurts and don't you dare expect me to just think that you're joking.

[@thefailurezone4689]

Best moment: *dramatic zoom* So don't!

[@aubriedeming2252]

I yelled at SIX people today for using gay as an insult. SIX FREAKING PEOPLE. THAT'S SIX LIVING BREATHING HUMAN BEINGS. THAT IOS ABSOFREAKINGLUTELY RIDICULOUS.

[@pantsrevolutions]

You have no idea how many times I have played this video just for the "EVERYTHING IS CHEMICALS!" rant.

[@garetr]

I totally agree regarding the bathroom paper rant. Do those companies really save money when I fold the bathroom paper 10 times to make the process somewhat sanitary?

[@jura3899]

Ha. Passive aggressive sack of ketchup pee is the funniest sentence I've ever heard!

[@evelynnwhitebridge2497]

You know, I have to point out that indeed a "turdface" would seem to stand to gain from increased ply in toilet paper, unless their defining feature was crucial to their identity, in which I would have to understand why the propagation of that ply would be ideal.

[@FaelynDexter]

Still one of my favorite videos.

[@lizzychan844]

The earphone and chair thing! I broke my favourite pair of earphones because of that!

[@evanknowles4780]

Lizzy C I would've broken the chair

[@thomaswillard6267]

Why don't you just not leave your "favourite pair of earphones" on the floor where the chair can tool over them.

[@lizzychan844]

Not really now that I'm aware of the problem.

[@OnesTheGoodWereTaken]

"PARSOKP" is now my favorite insult.

[@TheSolitaryGrape]

When you were saying about how you have it good and everything, it reminded me of a conversation my mum and I had recently, and she said one thing that really stuck in my mind- 'Just because other people have problems worse than yours, does not mean your problems are insignificant.' god damn I love my mum

[@chaotic_cassie7915]

Haha nice video, totally agree especailly with the gay as an insult thing. I like what you said about having the right to rant. There's a quote that I love: “I think that if I ever have kids, and they are upset, I won't tell them that people are starving in China or anything like that because it wouldn't change the fact that they were upset. And even if somebody else has it much worse, that doesn't really change the fact that you have what you have.” ―Stephen Chbosky

[@HakuRules1133]

Hank, you are the cutest.

[@softserve2734]

As soon as he starts talking about Buffy the vampire slayer I couldn't help but think he and AmazingPhil need to collaborate xD

[@biblinaaltaji296]

we're in too deep mate

[@elainebelzDetroit]

Whenever I ask someone how they are and they say, "I can't complain!" I encourage them to try harder.

[@skeetersorenson4909]

If your nose whistles, LEAVE THE ROOM AND BLOW YOUR STUPID NOSE!

[@chazzergamer]

I feel envigerated to have my own rants so here I go! 1. If you bring your phone to a cinema, TURN IT OFF!!! Honest to god I saw one kid bring a PSP into the film thAT SHOULD BE ILLEGAL!! 2. People who think that the term "Mary Sue" means a character who is perfect are gonna have a bad time since thats wrong! It means "A character who is so perfect that they are unharmed and not threatend by the works of the narritive." 3. Anyone who says "You don't get it" in a vapid attempt to sound superior please feel free to drench yourself in oil and light yourself on fire! 4. Strong female characters are characters that are written as deep and complex as their male counter parts and NOT just a cheap badass action girl!! Black Widow (In the movies) is not a strong female character since she is no where near developed as the other male heroes (Though I hope this will change with upcoming movies). 5. If you watch a show or movie simply because there are attractive people in it and no other reason you need to reevaulate your priorities. 6. People who argue over sub or dub anime need to go back into 2008 when this debate was still new because the rest of us anime fans are fucking sick of it!! 7. Shipping is fun. Shipping real people is fun. Deluding yourself into saying that 2 people are a thing or that their sexuality is different than what they say because of your ship is creepy and needs to stop (Dan and Phill fans I'm looking at most of you). 8. Fellas! If you are put in the friendzone then maturely accept rejection and continue to support your friend. Go all fedora "nice guy" on her and you deserve to be eaten alive by tiny ants from the inside out!! 9. If you laugh or belittle a straight guy for not wanting to kiss/caress sexually/advanced physical contact for hypothetical amount of money than please leave this planet and tell me what its like to breathe on Mars! Its not that they are homophobic that it makes them uncomfortable but the fact that they are not attracted to men! Just like how a lesbian would be uncomfortable in the same situation! 10. Tumblr....just Tumblr's attitude in general. 11. And finally!! If you throw away more than 3 slices of pizza in one sitting then I will personally rip down your throat and rearrange all your inner organs to the point where your heart in near your crotch and your bladder is in your lung!!

[@izzyGO52]

Sorry this is random but are you a fan of Jake and Amir, If I Were You? :D

[@chazzergamer]

izzyGO52 No I've never heard of those two. What made you ask though?

[@izzyGO52]

Haha Sorry it was the ant imagery which made me think of it but it was probably a bit far fetched XD

[@chazzergamer]

izzyGO52 Oh ok, in any case no I haven't even heard of them.

[@sedrickalcantara9588]

Charlie Brown Teo things: the first is i read this all in Hank's voice. Second, this needs to go viral.

[@morganmurphyloves1D]

Firefly and Buffy....I love you Hank ❤️

[@haleydawson11]

Whenever I'm feeling down, I come to this video. This is my favorite.

[@maroonggirl]

I think I've ranted about at least 15 of these things at some point or another. ESPECIALLY people not wiping up their frigging pee! Oh but I've had worse, Hank. While working at Wendy's, someone's baby's full diaper spilled all over the floor of the bathroom. You know who had to clean up all that baby poop? Yeah. Me. I'm talking like a giant pile of diarrhea. How something so teeny and adorable can produce that much crap, I will never know. To the mom's credit, she tried to clean it up. But the frigging cheap toilet paper just wasn't doing it. It just added to the mess.

[@JaredOttoMusic]

If the toilet paper was perforated, would it be "TEARableness?" :D

[@dracognia]

I agree with EVERYTHING said in this video. These rants are so spot-on that it's... YES!!!

[@rajkumarraghuram7085]

10 years later, and we still have the same problems, and Hank is still saying everything correctly

[@JamesLewis007]

y'know you do have the option to mute the passive aggressive voice on self serve checkouts. It's the volume control at the bottom of the screen. Give it a try some time.

[@cassie3854]

WAIT WHAT

[@JamesLewis007]

Vanelope VonShweets yep :)

[@globypants6057]

THANK YOU YOU HAVE SAVED MY LIFE AND THE LIFE OF ALL THE PEOPLE IN GROCERY STORES.

[@eldarauko]

Seriously people. Please stop saying "That's gay". Even more importantly, PLEASE stop using "retarded" as an insult. You're really just saying "that's stupid" or "messed up" and gay people or people with special needs are neither.

[@thoughtfulusername16]

I laughed so hard at the chemicals rant. One of my biggest pet peeves

[@hughburroughs]

I'm in the middle of a really bad classroom meet. And this really made my day.

[@crocussativus]

2:30 gets me every time

[@PixelHead777]

Get the squeezy kind, and BEFORE YOU USE IT, SHAKE IT. It removes the ketchup pee. Treat it like the classic bottle when it's running low by taking off the cap.

[@truboo4268]

+Joy Baker You sir, are my savior.

[@Prerna2205]

that's what she said..

[@bambilawl27]

I LOVE THIS> THAT IS NOT CHEESE> THANKYOU

[@spacepopeXIV]

Hank is hilarious and so angry at times on his Twitter and TikTok nowadays and I love it! So I literally searched up Hank Green mad on KZbin to find this gem. We need more angry but good people like Hank to counter the angry horrible people in the world.

[@emmaleptich4214]

AHAHAHHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHA! every part, every sentence, every WORD of this video is SO TRUE! i couldn't of said it better. THIS IS HILARIOUS AND AMAZING!

[@snakehands]

Ya it is weird that people use 'gay' as an insult, the other day I saw someone on youtube use 'transgender' as an insult. Like saying it to a pre-adolescent boy who I guess he thought looked girly 'cuz his hair was long and curly and he had really big eyes. Did I just make a poem?

[@metallsnubben]

It really is weird. It's just like using left-handed as an insult. You're not insulting the person you want to insult because IT'S A VERY NEUTRAL TRAIT THAT JUST OCCURS IN PEOPLE, yet you're insulting left handed people by implying that it's negative. HRRRNG

[@joeyverliesharen]

Too bad he didn't say that insulting people using 'gay' is just a super gay thing to do. I was really hoping he would say that.

[@saltyman7888]

except 'transgender' is like a greek/latin fancy word.

[@thoughtsfromahead]

A Hank favorite

[@ronnsama]

That was "John Wayne Toilet Paper"; it's rough and tough and takes no shit

[@user-ne3ze4zz7r]

Wealthiest country? The country that has $17.3 trillion in debt? o_o

[@ashleycasey2093]

Yep but we're still wealthy.

[@trevorsullivan2331]

Debt is not the opposite of wealth.

[@manguy01]

I loved this. But about the "gay" thing. (it's not really a problem for me, because I was brought up to not use the word) I know it's offensive, but i mean, come on. It's not even an etymologically useful word. It's an arbitrary and irrational term. You can't really be surprised when people use it to describe things that are arbitrary and irrational.

[@Snugfly]

u know your comment can be mistaken for u saying u believe that being gay is arbitrary and irrational.

[@Snugfly]

your comment could be misunderstood. others may think u belive being gay is arbitrary and irrational. which it is niether.

[@manguy01]

That's not what I meant although, I'm sure some people would actually agree with that. But, fanatical support of the homosexual movement like we do is a bit arbitrary and irrational. No one makes a big deal when people call things "lame" or "dumb." It's fashionable to fight for gay rights because we want people to think we're modern and moral. But few people actually know anything about what they're talking about.

[@helgakrobo]

MicManGuy Try "retarded" as an insult in a normal conversation: watch everyone flip their shit. "lame/dumb": there is neither a movement to defend nor a history of wide discrimination of people who can't walk well OR people who think slowly. Try again.

[@manguy01]

olegator5 You just made my point for me: There's no movement to defend the dumb and the lame. It's not what's popular. Which do you care about? People hurt by terms turned derogatory or being able to brag about how self-righteous you are? Also, Dumb means "mute" (cannot talk). For the better part of our history, the mute were considered stupid and the cripple were considered parasites. Oh, but defending those minorities isn't what's "in" right now, so who cares?

[@sevencinderblocks]

Calls America the wealthiest country. Lol

[@emmavanlieshout9389]

I remember watching this when it came out and laughing uncontrollably then immediately rewatching it. I wonder what it says about me that this is one of my favorite vlogbrothers videos, but it matters that it makes me laugh.

[@chesseswar]

0:54 I thought he was going to say Your Mom -_- oh how my friends have poisoned me so

[@robertgao565]

YOUR MOM HAS POISONED YOU

[@maggiewang4333]

YOUR POISON HAS MOMMED YOU

[@noahogata8420]

YOUR MOM HAS MOM POISON

[@robertgao565]

YOUR POISON HAS MOM MOM

[@maggiewang4333]

NO

[@LibertyLikes]

BTW: If you hit UP on the ketchup bottle, the ketchup will come out please spread the word this is IMPORTANT

[@gracestewart8168]

Yeah, if you tap the glass 57 on a Heinz bottle, (or the same spot if it's not a Heinz bottle) it will make the ketchup come out much faster.

[@michaelwalker4977]

Grace Stewart I was just about to give this same advice. Hold the bottle at about a 45 degree angle and tap the "shoulder" of the bottle (where the 57 is stamped on a Heinz bottle) with the side of your other hand and within about 10 taps it will start flowing. Or, as the friend who taught me this trick explained it, "You just spank the 57."

[@thesafteycrazycuber]

It's actually been found that gif is pronounced as yiff

[@SayHelloHelli]

oh I love yiffing

[@thesafteycrazycuber]

That's fine and dandy with me.

[@mosspirate]

It makes me happy that the books on the right hand shelves on the bookcase behind you are in colour order!

[@lugal-zage-si4782]

What if you use "that's gay" ironically around all your gay friends who also say "that's gay"

[@mirandabarrett8987]

I get that, but as a lesbian something that really put me off coming out for many years was hearing people use that word as an insult or a negative thing in public, so it still kind of sucks imo

[@lugal-zage-si4782]

I could understand that. My clique is very sexually expressive and open so no one cares if we use it ironically. I wouldn't say it to someone out side of this group though, especially because my school is cracking down on the phrase, which counterintuitively is what led us to start saying it, cause it felt like the school was going too far. Over all context really matters, if a preppy conservative douche says it, it's different than if I or a gay person says it ironically.

[@mirandabarrett8987]

Avery Neese sure it is, but how does I or anyone else know what's ironic and what's not? If you use it in front of other people, and I'm assuming you do if you go places with your friends, people may judge you negatively for saying it thinking you're a homophobic wanker or those in the closet/insecure may be afraid to come out because of it, or others are encouraged to use it including kids because they see it as normal and ok. What I'm saying is assuming you use it in front of others they will not know what's ironic and what's not Fair enough on the school thing, sort of had the same thing with "mindfulness," but better that than the other way.... there are kids in my area that yell abuse at gay kids in the street or at school (or those who might act or look camp/butch whatever) and the schools just don't give a shit cause they see it as a choice to be open

[@lugal-zage-si4782]

I guess it's good to see someone else's perspective. (There are some exemptions but-) Everyone at my school are total libs because I live in a suburb of a capital city in the Northern United States.

[@mirandabarrett8987]

Avery Neese Damn, that must be awesome.... I live in London which means some parts are extremely left wing and other parts are full of pig fucking, poor hating bastards

[@starshipsfly537]

IKR CLEAN UP UR OWN BODY FLUID that sounds weird

[@emilybuesing5157]

Amen Hank. Amen.

[@kolyabean]

This is one of my all time favorite vlogbrothers vids. :)

[@kolyabean]

8 years later this is still true. I can recite basically the entire thing. So that's fun

[@tompov227]

0:52 me @ everyone I know

[@lolygagger5991]

cool fact america is not the most wealthiest country

[@lolygagger5991]

Ky Doyle are you correcting me or acting American

[@lolygagger5991]

Pie Does Games I am not jealous I just feel about America as the feeling of a the countries except America

[@lolygagger5991]

Pie Does Games alright then did you know the income of America is lower then the Canadian income

[@lolygagger5991]

Pie Does Games and here is the proof of Americans being the worst a human can be

[@lolygagger5991]

Pie Does Games what makes you think I live in a cave?!

[@PeachReaver]

Passive aggressive sack of ketchup pee..XDDD

[@manuel8887]

Or PASOKP.

[@bethjacobx]

I do have a question, though: if it's bad to release your anger in this way, what's the healthy (healthier?) alternative? It's inevitable that people will get angry, so how can you express it in any other manner?

[@emullinsstreams]

3:33 Gets me every time. xD

[@SuperZwitterion]

How come saying "that's gay" is offensive (which I agree) but saying "Jesus Christ" when angry is not. I'm not trying to start some religion war or anything but its offensive to me and millions of other christians.

[@instahswap]

Because saying 'that's gay' is directly adding a negative connotation to being gay. 'Jesus Christ' is just exclaiming a name. Saying the name of a gay person in anger like say 'Oh Stephen Fry!' isn't insulting to gay people. Also, * I'm sorry this may seem mean * but the percentage of people that are Christians in the world is decreasing significantly and probably will continue to over the next few decades. I was born into a Atheist household and I don't believe in god, and so are 95% of the people I know. That's not even an exaggeration. It's probably closer to 98% actually. On the contrary to this, it is becoming more socially accepted to be gay and it's only really the right-wing Christians (by the majority) that are against people being gay. I hope I enlightened a bit :)

[@kmorgm6087]

I am not religious like at all, however i do agree with you Matt. Using 'Jesus Christ' is just as offensive as using 'Your so gay' and we really should be more careful what we say around other people.

[@instahswap]

I understand why that' your opinion and I respect that but personally I don't' agree :)

[@SuperZwitterion]

Instahswap I think you missed the point. Jesus Christ is not just another name, this is the name of my Lord and savior. A better comparison would be like if someone insulted your parents or your siblings in a manner that was crude and made you angry, now multiply that by a billion. Jesus is everything to me, He loved me so much to die for my sins. He has become the way to eternal life through His death and He's a friend who is closer than a brother. As far as the number of people who are or are not christian is irrelevant. The homosexual community is only about 1-3% of the population in America, even less worldwide. But like I said, I'm not here to start some debate, I just wanted to voice my opinion. I hope I did not come off as disrespectful, it was not my intention. God bless.

[@kassidyp6412]

It's not insulting to say Jesus Christ because Jesus is a mythical being, it would be much like exclaiming "OH EASTER BUNNY!", Or "OH SANTA CLAUS!!!" when you're angry, and in saying this, I don't want to start an argument because the vast majority of Christians are idiots and I don't want to debate about religion with one. Thank you, enjoy the rest of your delusional life :)

[@karlhiscock92]

NO! not everything is a chemical; light isn't a chemical :P

[@jrobbo123456]

I am far more offended by the excessive amount of packaging on that "cheese"

[@PeteNicholsonAnimation]

haha "EVERYTHING IS CHEMICALS"