7 Years As A Widow: How My Grief Has Changed

7 Years As A Widow: How My Grief Has Changed | One Happy Widow

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One Happy Widow

Күн бұрын

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@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Has your grief changed over time?

@susanmereau8939 6 ай бұрын

As I again sit here again with tears rolling down my face after losing my husband of 53 years, I am feeling everything you are sharing, but it is getting harder not easier! Thank you for being you and letting us know what we are going through is normal! God bless you.

@almacristinaroman507 5 ай бұрын

My life and priorities are different but I feel 90% of what you described. It’s been 6 months without my husband and it gets worse and worse, not only in the way I feel but how the life around me is changing.

@almacristinaroman507 5 ай бұрын

@@susanmereau8939I feel the same, harder for me and I feel people around me start pulling out

@encouragingword1172 2 ай бұрын

@@OneHappyWidow When you are younger and have the desire to remarry, l understand how you can regain happiness but women my age more often settle for a functional life with interspersed episodes of pleasant experiences or just peace while listening to the birds or music or enjoying a good church service, a fun TV series or good food. But l am still always thinking of how much better it would be if he was still in the house. I have no desire to remarry because men my age have as many or more health issues than l do and l don’t want to take care of an old man l have no history with. Most elderly men marry for that reason, someone to wait on them, take them to the doctor, etc. Elderly widowhood for males or females is terrible but l think women fare better than men most of the time. My husband was thankful for everything and never expected anything from me but was grateful for the love and care, and l was grateful to give it. But at this point, no more of that. I am glad that you have found a new soul mate though. Many blessings!

@bevjohnson5280 2 ай бұрын

If you don't mind me saying, it sounds like you are engaging in a lot of erratic and chaotic behaviour. Must have been extremely difficult for the children, if not devastating, to see you remarry, so soon after their father's passing.

@liaalbo9108 4 ай бұрын

I lost my husband 2 years ago. I stopped crying every day, but the pain doesn't leave. I function, but the pain doesn't leave. ❤

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

I understand how that goes

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

im so sorry about your husband loss, trust me i completly understand how it feels to lose our love one, my wife passed away 3yrs ago and the pain was unbearable but it get better with time, itd be nice to hear from you, where are you from .?.,

@reneemartin9041 5 ай бұрын

I lost my husband 25 days ago… every morning realizing he is gone is so hard.

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry, you are certainly in the fresh grief stage!

@123azadeh Ай бұрын

I lost my husband on Nov 5th. The pain of loosing him is constant. I don't know what to do!

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@@123azadeh im so sorry about your husband loss, trust me i completly understand how it feels to lose our love one, my wife passed away 3yrs ago and the pain was unbearable but it get better with time, itd be nice to hear from you, where are you from .?.

@dorothybeveridge3133 5 күн бұрын

Hi . I lost my husband last June . I’m finding it difficult to cope with his loss. Nearly 7 months but it’s still hurting so much . I cry everyday 😢. How do people cope ? I’m struggling 😢. Please help me . June was our 55 years married , he died 5 days after our anniversary . I can’t cope anymore . 💔🌹😭

@patricec7675 5 ай бұрын

I found your channel, and I appreciate you doing this for others. I lost my husband 2 months ago today. He was murdered in a completely senseless killing at his office space while he returned home for a few days to work before rejoining us on vacation. We have an adult daughter (29) and an 11 and 13 year old at home. I was informed of his murder while at vacation, 4 hours away. This is the most difficult time I can imagine for all of us. Seeing that I am not alone in this pain has helped. I am unable to sleep. I cannot think properly. I have to deal with police and court. I said goodbye to him on Monday afternoon and on Tuesday morning was told he was gone. I miss him immensely. He is my best friend. I don't know how to be without him. It has been a struggle. I appreciate your videos. I feel validated in my feelings. Thank you.

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

I am so sorry you are in this traumatic grief right now! It’s so tough to grieve our spouse and still maintain a life for our children, who are also grieving in a much different way. I have several videos about solo parenting that might be a good resource for you.

@mom4peace919 6 ай бұрын

My month is November and it will be 8 years this November. My husband was 47, I was 54. I'm 62 now. and retired from the school system. I've followed you for awhile and appreciate your honesty. Thank you for sharing and being real. I feel like I've watched every video, listened to every podcast and read every book on being a widow over the last 7 years and what I've noticed is that almost all people speaking out are remarried. While I can appreciate that the loss and grief never go away, I also think there is a significant difference in widowed when we've made the choice to not seek out another partner. There is a real finality in checking the "widow" box forever. A whole different set of challenges are creaated on top of the loss and grief...like no support, not feeling understood, loneliness., having to do EVERYTHING on your own, growing old alone, being a single parent (albiet to grown children) and the list goes on. There is feeling lonely and actually being alone most of the time, and they are completely different. I've wondered why more people who have "chosen " the widow life don't speak out and I think it's because society is way less patient and unwilling to hear about the loneliness, whereas stories of remarriage are more hopeful and filled with people being resilient and these stories are just easier to hear and more socially acceptable. Remarried widows are considered strong and resilient and provide stories of hope, whereas widows who don't remarry are considered weak and pathetic. And of course this just adds to the isolation. Just another perspective. Thank you for sharing your story and allowing others to do the same.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your perspective from someone who has chosen a different path in this journey. I can certainly appreciate that there are other aspects of the long-term grief for someone who does not find (or choose to find) love again. It’s always a double-edged sword, as there are many people who don’t think I have the right to speak about widowhood since I have remarried. I do enjoy hearing the different ways that people handle their life after loss, so thank you for taking the time to shed some light on some different ways that people grieve!

@gracehillgranny5445 6 ай бұрын

I understand exactly what you're saying. I've not remarried either. It's been almost 10 years. Married friends are now more like acquaintances. Living lonely is different than living alone. We don't fit the expectations of what others think we should do/be. But, keep being you. It takes a strong minded and determined person to embrace life without a partner. Yes, we have our struggles, but we aren't weak.

@terrilynch5435 6 ай бұрын

I don’t believe ANY widow is EVER weak or pathetic. Remarriage is statistically difficult for widows AND divorced women purely considering that there are so many more widows than widowers. (Numerically men die earlier ). Let’s just embrace that life is hard. Being a successful woman while widowed or divorced or single or MARRIED is challenging. Life/God may or may not give you another opportunity to marry. One is not more hopeful or sad. I’m inspired by many widows I see and know who are transparent about learning and growing & living.

@terrilynch5435 6 ай бұрын

@user-ei8rb7sj6c 6 ай бұрын

My month is March and it was 9 years for me this year. From what you’ve said in your comment, all I know is that you’ve decided you don’t want to remarry. There could be many reasons for that, but none make me think you are weak and/or pathetic. As widows, we may have some feelings and experiences in common, but our histories and circumstances are all different. I hope you will be as kind and loving with yourself as you would be with your best friend. While being a widow has its problems and challenges, such as those you mentioned, remarrying would have problems and challenges, too. At 71, I don’t know if I’ll remarry or not. If I were to meet and fall in love with a fine gentleman who knows what might happen? None of us knows what the future holds. All we can do is live one day at a time, and look forward to what surprises tomorrow may bring! Wishing you all the best!

@JudiKerestan 6 ай бұрын

The worst thing about losing my husband 2 weeks ago was someone saying that now you are single , you fulfilled your vows.,No way I am still married ,, only my husband is up there and Im down here but he will always be my husband...

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Sometimes people say the dumbest things! Of course you still feel married, and in some way you might always. And that’s ok!

@encouragingword1172 4 ай бұрын

I understand. Wore my wedding ring for 3 yrs after my husband died, then the diamond fell out and l never found it. I was devastated! Now l wear a silver ring of costume jewelry on that finger and my wedding ring is in the jewelry box. I never look at it. Pictures that used to bring me such joy only make me cry now, so l don’t look at those either. I still feel married also, over 4 yrs after Jim’s death. He’s just not in the house.

@SuzanneRobinette 2 ай бұрын

@@OneHappyWidowthat’s not dumb, that’s cruel. I’m a recent widow, and I’ve heard, and overlooked, even understood, some “ dumb” things. Why can’t you just say so?

@teresapaliwoda 6 ай бұрын

It's so tough especially when menopause hits. I've been a widow twice. Once when I was 40 my husband died of leukemia. Then I remarried 4 years later. Then 16 years later my husband died of a massive heart attack in his chair during the night. I understand about the hair. I did the same. My mother died last year and my weight has blossomed. I try to be as loving to myself as I am to others who are struggling. Be kind to yourself. Thanks for putting yourself out there for us.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback #widfam

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@dianemadir5710 Ай бұрын

It's been 6.years since I lost my husband and everything you're saying resonates with me. And glad to see you posting again. Thank you.

@OneHappyWidow Ай бұрын

Thanks for your support!

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@gracehillgranny5445 6 ай бұрын

Your video just popped up in my feed. I almost didn't tune in. I was widowed at age 51. Our 3 youngest were in college, our oldest were married with babies and small children. Two weeks before he passed, our 3rd son became a 1st time Daddy. She was born 2 weeks early. He passed on her due date. Even then, the Lord blessed us with her arrival. It will be 10 yrs this December. Almost everything you've shared, I can identify with. (Except) I've not dated nor remarried, so blending a family hasn't been my journey. The journey has been tough on my heart and our children, but we're all doing well, most of the time. My beloved was also a military career Soldier. Retired SFC/E7, he never got that option to experience retirement, though. Being a widowed grandmother has many aches and growing pains. I can't afford the things we used to offer our oldest grandblessings. But, if not for our grandblessings, I'm not sure I'd have come this far. 10yrs ... seems like yesterday and a thousand years at the same time. Christ Jesus has been faithful through it all. I'll be tuning in as you share. I'm glad I clicked play.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

I’m glad you clicked too! Thanks for watching, and sharing your feedback.

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@lauramiller6294 6 ай бұрын

I just passed the 2 year mark. My life has definitely changed. Over the last 2 years I have made my house mine. There is no one to share it with other than grandkids and now great grands. I do what I want when I want and I don't care what anyone thinks. Yes I do miss my husband every day. I suspect I always will. I meet with a group of friends twice a month. I don't mind doing things by myself. I have had to learn how to keep up with repairs on house. The most difficult part of that is finding right person for job. Overall I figured out I had to take care of myself. Nobody is going to do it for me.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

You sound like you have embraced your independence, I’m proud of you!

@annamaegrout8159 4 ай бұрын

Well I lost my husband 6 years ago and I miss him so so much. I also do most everything alone. I use to say I won't go out to eat alone well that changed. I go alone or don't go. Your life changes so much.

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@@annamaegrout8159 im so sorry about your husband loss, trust me i completly understand how it feels to lose our love one, my wife passed away 3yrs ago and the pain was unbearable but it get better with time, itd be nice to hear from you, where are you from .?.

@beatricefrask5230 6 ай бұрын

Being a young widow with a kid to raise on my own cost me my health. She was 2. Now that she is 19, I am starting to catch my breath.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Raising grieving children is probably the hardest part of being a widow, in my opinion!

@serenitybee9665 6 ай бұрын

So thankful for this channel 🙏 I lost my husband 2 months ago😭💔 Our son in an accident in 2020😭Miss them both so much . 🙏

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

I'm so sorry for your compounded loss and grief. Prayers for you #widfam

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@elaineplowman9621 6 ай бұрын

I lost my husband 11 months ago but I am older than most of you. It is hard but gets easier. However your life is changed forever and will never be the same again! The World refers to you as single which to me hurts because I didn’t choose this life. I am still adjusting but I do attend a Grief Share group which helps some.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

I’m glad you found a group that helps you. Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback #widfam

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@AnneGorman-td2xf Күн бұрын

31:46 I’m really enjoying your talks. You are the only other person besides me that said they have a love hate relationship with their hair😅. My husband died 9 months ago and I’m grateful to have found this.

@antonellatotino2794 6 ай бұрын

Thankyou for bringing up this topic. I'm at the 6 1/2 year mark of living my husband. Noone talks about it anymore. Grief changes, but what a journey!!!! Still heartbroken, picking up my pieces and for my children. Yes, sooo hard trying to help your children. Thankyou. God's strength!

@antonellatotino2794 6 ай бұрын

Spelling error. Losing my husband

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your support #widfam

@annegiarratana7744 6 ай бұрын

Our loved ones are always around as spirits they see everything especially they never miss big occasions

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

We don’t actually believe this, but there’s no way to know who is right…thanks for watching!

@maryd8393 6 ай бұрын

My hubby has passed three yrs three months ago 4/30/24. All I did was cry during this whole video. My hubby was in the military for twenty yrs. So I feel all the feels like you do.

@irenemojocoa 6 ай бұрын

Sorry for your loss. My husband was in the military for 20 years too! He passed too young only 50, on November 2022. Miss him every second 😭

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry you are feeling n this journey, my friend

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Those patriotic holidays are triggering, aren’t they?

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@@irenemojocoa im so sorry about your husband loss, trust me i completly understand how it feels to lose our love one, my wife passed away 3yrs ago and the pain was unbearable but it get better with time, itd be nice to hear from you, where are you from .?.,.

@marshagaspard6239 6 ай бұрын

This video is so relatable. Thanks for sharing it. I became a widow 2.5 years ago. As you said, grief is a different journey for everyone, but the whole time that I was watching, I noticed that I was constantly shaking my head, "yes". I explained it to another recent widow like this: It is the most unique, strangest, unpredictable, difficult journey that you will ever go on, but you will make it with faith.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Yes, all of this! It is so hard to explain it to someone who hasn't lost a spouse, and almost no need to explain it to someone who has. We just "get it" in some sort of way. Thanks for watching, and sharing your feedback #widfam

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@lynhead52 6 ай бұрын

I am glad you are back- I am 1 1/2 yrs out - it is still very hard. It helps to understand what all others go through. We were married almost 48 yrs, I haven't found that 'new normal'.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

It take a while to rescue true your whole life, and we do it reluctantly, so that takes even more time. Go at your own pace, and be kind to yourself!

@lindaallen7283 6 ай бұрын

Thank you so very much for sharing your experience. You are a great example of navigating life after losing a spouse. We are 2 months shy of 5 years after losing my husband of 45 years, and the pain has become tolerable but will never be gone. I miss him daily. I am grateful for the way you describe finding a new routine through life. Two years ago the older of our 2 children decided to become estranged from all family; I’m finding that very difficult, but I will continue finding the comfort and peace through faith.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback. Our oldest daughter who lives in CA has also gone no-contact with us also. She left her son with his dad and she moved across the country as far away from us as she could get. I pray daily that she will return to her family one day, but her brain will have to be in a different place before that can happen.

@andybrown9503 3 ай бұрын

I appreciate your content so very much, my hubs of 23 years passed 6 weeks ago, metastatic bladder cancer. It true that much of my grieving was done throughout his illness but it still sneaks up on me at weird moments! I’m 53 and now pretty much done with menopause now but it affected my hair and skin texture and one day I found hair dust or powder and it makes my hair amazing!!! Thank you for helping me process the big feelings

@OneHappyWidow 3 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching- I’m 51 now and in the middle of menopause and the hot flashes and thin hair are terrible. I do use hair powder and it helps make it look thicker at least b

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@iccee571 6 ай бұрын

I am so glad I watched this. It has been 8 years since I lost my husband. I still grief to a certain extent. This grief is one you dont get over but it gets easier. I glad these are normal feelings....

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Yes, totally normal!

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@cherihermans9118 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for your video. My husband of 50 years passed away this February. He was very ill for 8 years. Now I am navigating and finding a new path. I miss him terribly. ❤ The first year is hard we lost our oldest son in a motor vehicle accident over 20 years ago so I know all the “firsts “ are hard.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for watching and sharing some of your story with us. Prayers to you #widfam

@BicyclesConfusion 3 ай бұрын

They always are.

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@elainekomara8555 2 ай бұрын

My husband died on Father’s Day in 2023.. we were only married 9 years.. my life will never be the same.. it’s tough.. and heartbreaking.. We are all on our own journey in life even when our spouse is alive. We just don’t realize it at that time. I realized that I was on my own journey after my husband died…Gods my all in all..

@OneHappyWidow 2 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching, and sharing your perspective. Amen!

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@terrilynch5435 6 ай бұрын

I’ve missed you Leo! Please know how much you are loved. I’m approaching 6 years as a widow. You’ve helped me so much. I say “me too” to everything you share. I still cry too. Every day we keep growing stronger. ❤

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks so much for your feedback! I appreciate you #widfam

@robincivitello4473 6 ай бұрын

Hello, I just watched your video for the first time, the video when you talked about your late husband's diagnosis. My struggle is with my son.... He was diagnosed with glioblastoma and given 1to 2 yrs. to live. This was 15 mos. ago. I grieve everyday. He had a clinical trial last September, he was sick most of the winter from this trial but it gave him more time . Right now he has bad days and good days. He had been excepted for phase 2 of the trial. This week he had a scan and the tumor has grown from the last scan. The phase 2 is not until January.😢 This type of cancer is very aggressive and incurable..... January is 61/2 mos. Away. Now I find myself pacing the floor because I'm terrified he won't make it to the trial date! So I understand what it's like to grieve before any passing. I can't believe I'm loosing a child....he is 43 and 1 of 5....thank you for your videos. Robin

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

5 ай бұрын

I lost my husband 6 days ago. The grief is overwhelming. I have a great support system but I can't let them in right now. For now, I hibernate in our house, surrounded by my husband's things, listening to videos like this. Does it help to know others are suffering as I am? I don't know. Sorry, I'm rambling.

@edgrossman8929 5 ай бұрын

Don’t be sorry. Talk is like therapy. I am moving through my own grief after losing my spouse in January 2024

@OneHappyWidow 5 ай бұрын

You are in fresh grief right now, and it’s normal to not want company for a while. Take one day at a time, and be kind to yourself.

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@TheJillyrabbit 6 ай бұрын

I was just thinking about you the other day and wondering if you were MIA...nice to have you back

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for thinking of me, yes I'm officially BACK! I had to take a mental health break- just needed to rest my brain, body, heart...all the things!

@MrSscutch 6 ай бұрын

Almost 3 years out...remarried for 6 months... I still get the wind knocked out of me when i see his items and have to make a decision about what to do with his belongings and then I need a day to cry....my new husband had lost his wife as well so he understands...

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

You are both lucky to have each other.

@mariselaramirez1087 5 ай бұрын

I just joined and you look beautiful! ❤❤ My husband committed suicide almost 4 months ago, he was 44. It’s been really hard but God has been my strength!!

@OneHappyWidow 5 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing her feedback!

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@neoncoyote2008 6 ай бұрын

Leo, your videos have been a touchstone for me in the six months since my husband died. I appreciate you, your intent to help, and your no-nonsense and forthcoming delivery more than I can say. I hear you on the frustration of menopause - please find a health care provider well-versed in HRT to see if you might be a candidate...it can be life-changing, including addressing the seemingly endless weight gain. I also understand your thoughts on not feeling your best on camera; but I want to assure you that I'm seeing the same generous, helpful spirit and person I saw in all the other videos, and I have nothing but positive thoughts towards your appearance. We're all in the same struggle with that, same as this widows' club. I so appreciate everything you do. Looking forward to your future content.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for all your kind words! I did mention to my doctor at my last appt about HRT, and she sort of blew me off, saying that the side effects can sometimes be worse than the original symptoms, so unless I'm truly suffering, it's not time yet. Since I started eating better, the hot flashes have gotten better, but this weight and low-energy is for the birds!!!

@lauriearcher7939 6 ай бұрын

Leo! I have missed you! I am so glad you’re back and I think you look fabulous! I am looking forward to your live session. I’m going on 3 years and am finally realizing this is my life now and it is nothing like I thought it would be at this age. Being a widow sucks!

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Yes, it totally does!

@TheReneepruitt 4 ай бұрын

Well, I feel like shit. My husband died August 26. The only saving grace that I can say is it at least he was here to hold my hand when I lost my son because if I had lost my son after my husband, I don’t think I could’ve done it without My husband.. My husband has been my rock for 33 yrs. I was worried about him anyways but he kept saying nothing is wrong but he had a heart attack right in front of me. I tried CPR and nothing.. I was afraid this would happen. But I am still in shock and I am lost. He has been the one who gave me a life that was worth living. And now I don’t even have him to tell about my day. I hate waking up.. I hate coming home and not seeing him sitting in his garage waiting on me to get home. I hate feeling like I am in constant verge of vomiting. So I have been grieving my son who was only 23 to now, my husband. How can I go on? Why do I want to? No I am not contemplating on unloving myself but I ask what is the point now? I feel despair and I keep praying and I am praying God will talk to me

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry widfam. I can tell you that it does get easier over time, but you’ll have to be the one to find what brings you joy again when you are ready. Or maybe eye you’re just tired of being sad all the time. I pray you reach that phase soon, with Gods help.

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@abmelvic5066 Ай бұрын

How wonderful you remarried. It looks like things are looking up for you. Thats very good. My husband died three Saturdays ago and I am grieving like theres no tomorrow. So many things trigger my emotions. Ill be vacuming ad i'll be crying. I'll be driving and I'll be crying.

@OneHappyWidow Ай бұрын

Yes, I understand the fresh grief stage, it is so difficult! Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback.

@edmundpotrzeba6094 19 күн бұрын

Loved your video i just wish id come across it 15 years agoas it would have been of great help to me. I use to be super fit now i put on 20lbs if i just walk past a cake shop, ok i sometimes go in. You know in 30 years time you would give everything you own to look as good as you do now. I just wanted you to know that theres a man on the otherside of the world whos greatful for your lovely videos 👍❤️

@OneHappyWidow 14 күн бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your support

@susanlira6331 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for your brutal honesty. I understand most of what you are saying. Your testimony is helpful.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching

@dennismccowan5375 6 ай бұрын

Glad you are back! Your videos helped me after my wife passed...now its been just over 2 years.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching #widfam

@kathrynjones4610 2 ай бұрын

YOur posts are more helpful than you can imagine. Thank you.

@OneHappyWidow 2 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your support. I’m here every Monday at noon EST for live sessions too if you’d like to come here for that and chat as well!

@tammymarsden4852 6 ай бұрын

Welcome back what a treat , your videos are amazing they help so much in 1 month my husband will be gone 3 yrs time flies but stands still if that makes sense. Same here anything patriotic gets my heart he was in the Navy and qhen u say some gave all oh yeah I know what u mean. Nice to see u Leo and so happy ur back take care and give yourself grace ur amazing ❤

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback #widfam

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@irenemojocoa 6 ай бұрын

I’ve followed you a few months after the passing of my husband on Nov 2022. Thank you for sharing all of your grief journey. I can definitely relate to many of your experiences.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your support #widfam

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@irenemojocoa 14 күн бұрын

@@chrisjohnson-l4n thanks and my condolences to you as well.

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@@irenemojocoa it’s nice hearing from you, where are you from .?

@jeannekrenk3949 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for continuing to share your journey; I have missed you … I came upon your Channel when I lost my Mark last Fall … thank you for saying that patriotic holidays are especially hard; he was retired Air Force and these holidays have hit me hard; I thought that was kind of crazy on my part but you have helped me to put some perspective on those feelings … I really appreciated how you talked about honoring the memory of your loved one by living your best life … I am a retired Special Education teacher; my advice to you is to take care of yourself; it’s a very tough job and I totally understand your stress … ❤ Grateful to have “visited” you today!

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Sounds like we have a lot in common! I have yet another new job this fall, and I'll talk about it in my net video, but I can say that it's part-time, and it's not in SPED...hopefully those 2 changes will help a little! Thanks for watching, and sharing your feedback #widfam

@scrapstress 5 ай бұрын

I have missed you , thank you for coming back ❤

@orthodudeness 3 ай бұрын

One and a half years for me now. The grief is changing. Now it is sometimes very sharp. Seems to not be waves anymore, more like a circle. Linda was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2019. Looking back over the past 5 years, I can see the changes in her from about 2014. Didn't know what it was all about, what was happening. Lewy Body is that way. The sharp pian is back from time to time. I see it, I won't push it away, but I know to not let it take over. That is tough. Main point of that is, she would not want me to just give up. She would want me to live. 2020, tough year, as you point out, for everyone. Linda was regressed to the point of not knowing what was happening at all. Covid, and then there was a fire here. 173,000 acres of forest. 400 homes lost. We were lucky, it just burned all the forest around us. We were evacuated for 2 weeks. Highway was closed for 47 miles. We live at mile 24. Anyhow, thing I remember the most right now is my thoughts from 2020 to 2023 when she died, 3/19.2023. I remember giving up our horses and donkeys to a great rescue place, all in great homes now. That happened in 2020 as caring for Linda and all of them became too much. Weird thing I remember the most is helping her up from her recliner every night, walking her to bed, tucking her in, I love you dear. I would do this walk with her, thinking "How long am I going to have to do this?". Maybe because she always healed from all her ills so well. Strange thing is looking back at that and realizing I never thought that those walks would end because she was going to die. It took 2 and a half years of those walks till she died at home. I am still amazed that thought of her death never crossed my mind during those walks. Although I did know she was terminal as are all with dementia. Anticipatory grief was very real for me then. Maybe it was just that it lasted for 5 years till she died. We have no children. I still live in the same house. 24 miles from town. I have a few friends up here, mostly alone now. I am getting out, forcing myself sometimes to stay mobile and not just sit and waste away. Acceptance and grief got better at the beginning of this year, easier to handle. At this moment it is tough again. Tough times are getting further apart. I can see that, but I wish the tough would end. Trying not to make grief the focus of my life and not push it away either. It is smoothing out. My job is helpful. I have my own business for 44 years now. Started working in the field in 1969, 55 years ago. Seems like it might just pan out ok. The guilt for having a happy time or day is tough but I am finding it less difficult as time goes on. I just keep telling myself, reminding myself, Linda would want me to go on. As I would want her to go on if it went that way. We did discuss this point years ago. Everyone, be sure to cover this point now, not later, with your family. Thanks for the opportunity to ramble on here. Be well.💖

@OneHappyWidow 3 ай бұрын

Thanks for sharing your feelings and part of your story. You are right, she would want you to move forward on her behalf, but I understand how guilt comes along with growth.

@tinahauser8864 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for all the videos you have made. My husband has terminal colon cancer. I’ll be referring back to these videos in the future for sure.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Praying for you, and thanks for watching.

@elenamanley5509 3 ай бұрын

Your video gives me hope and a little less fatalistic. Thank you.

@OneHappyWidow 3 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your support.

@terrigodfrey8260 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for your words. You are so lovely and a very good communicator. Even though I am much older and my kids are adults with kids, much of what you say pertains to any widow, at any age. Very helpful and wise words to me as I listen. I am coming up on the 3rd anniversary of losing my prince. Having been thru menopause some years ago, I notice that your thyroid is swollen which may be indicative of hypothyroid (underactive) and two major symptoms of that are hair loss and weight gain and it almost always shows up at this age for the first time. I was put on thyroid medication for about 10 years which helped a great deal. Also research what nutrients support thyroid production....zinc, selenium, iodine, etc., and eating higher protein and lower carb. That info helped me back then tremendously. I'm not a doctor and if this doesn't pertain to you, please disregard.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for your suggestions and your kind words as well! I do have Hashimoto's, diagnosed about 8-10 years ago and take medication, but it doesn't seem to make me feel much different if I'm off it or on it. THe dr. said nutrition will make more difference in how I feel than anything. I have been carnviroe eating for hte past year and a half or so, probably about 85% of the time...but those other 15% days when I have a setback, my body goes full-blown craving mode and I can easily gain 5-10 pounds in about 3 days of eating "junk" so it's been difficult to be consistent. It's just a constant job to see what makes me feel the best, what I can stomach, and of course the will power to stick to it!

@DonWright-w9e 4 ай бұрын

I so understand, when we hard time with weight, then my hair not right, it is a hard day! Enjoy your content! You are a beautiful soul! Keep on keeping on. North Carolina! The best of 3

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching

@suefanning2067 6 ай бұрын

Leo I was thinking you look great!! Good to see you.☺️

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Aww thanks, #widfam

@dawnleonard3000 4 ай бұрын

I can't tell you how much your videos have helped me!! Thank you so much❤

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your support

@piligarcia4771 6 ай бұрын

Refering to menopause , I spent like 10 yrs with this problem and hot flushes ,especially if I was stressed ..and being a wifow didn,t help..and someone told me to try leaving all dairy and anything made with wheat flour..like normal bread and cakes biscuits ect..and within a week I started to feel much better and the hot flushes stopped..unless I have a fright..or I eat wheat..then in 15 mins I have a hot flush...I have been controling these two ingredients for about 6 months and my blood work came out perfect and I feel totaly different...I also have hot ginger drink for brealfast and a couple of rounds of pineapple first..and my weight has stabilized .

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Than you for the advice! I have cut out all gluten and flour for several months, and my hot flashes also went away. Of course my cycle returned also lol. I do believe that nutrition is the key to so much healing, without all the nasty side effects of medication. I have been on keto/carnivore mix for about a year. I haven't lost any weight, but my health is actually better (bloodwork, etc) than it has been in a long time.

@toniwaugh1823 6 ай бұрын

Hi Leo, so happy that you're back on KZbin. You look great! 👍 Thank you for sharing with us your grief journey over the past 7 years . I am almost 2.5 years into my grief journey after losing my wonderful husband. I find it hard realizing that he will never come home to me. 😢 Looking forward to your future videos. 😊

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback #widfam

@Redmemory1 6 ай бұрын

Glad to see you on KZbin again! Teaching is so, so hard. I left my teaching career many, many years ago and never looked back. Have you considered a different career path?

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Yes, it just keeps getting worse every year! I’m transitioning out, hopefully this next year is my last, as it’s only part-time!

@prettyeyescovington5430 5 ай бұрын

Thank you, I needed to hear story because for me it's so hard and it seems like the pain will never get easier go away.

@OneHappyWidow 5 ай бұрын

I understand; sometimes it seems that way. I suggest keeping a journal to track your progress.

@marycobb-blumer7826 18 күн бұрын

I was wondering about you. Dec 15 2020 my husband passed away He was a veteran. This holiday I didn't do so well.

@OneHappyWidow 16 күн бұрын

Thanks for watching #widfam

@marycobb-blumer7826 16 күн бұрын

I'm trying to connect with people going through similar situations. It's been very difficult and lonely for sure

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@@marycobb-blumer7826 im so sorry about your husband loss, trust me i completly understand how it feels to lose our love one, my wife passed away 3yrs ago and the pain was unbearable but it get better with time, itd be nice to hear from you, where are you from .?.,.

@janwilson6765 6 ай бұрын

Welcome back, we have a couple of things in common, not liking the month of June. I lost my husband June 2nd 2017 so I am also a widow 7 years and my husband's birthday is also in June. We were married 49 years . I have not remarried . It's great you're back ,looking forward to future videos. Have a great day.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your story #widfam

@johandrihougaard437 6 ай бұрын

My husband died 2 June 2023, so I am in my 1 year. It is hard, but God is good!!!

@janwilson6765 6 ай бұрын

One moment at a time

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@@johandrihougaard437 im so sorry about your husband loss, trust me i completly understand how it feels to lose our love one, my wife passed away 3yrs ago and the pain was unbearable but it get better with time, itd be nice to hear from you, where are you from .?..

@encouragingword1172 4 ай бұрын

Thank you for your channel and sharing your story.

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching

@psrwhite 6 ай бұрын

So good to hear you. I started listening to you in 2021, right after my husband died. You feel like an old friend I haven't seen in awhile but we haven't missed a beat. So glad you are here again!

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

What a nice thing to say! 2021 is when I started the channel, and it is so nice to get back to it!

@AnhTran-ek6cx 6 ай бұрын

you look good Leo! sending you hugs

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks #widfam

@songbird5030 3 ай бұрын

Thank you!!

@OneHappyWidow 3 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching

@lindaness7002 6 ай бұрын

Lonely vs loneliness...complex. coming up on the 3rd anniversary of my husband's death..August 19th.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching #widfam

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@jamesvowels2972 2 ай бұрын

Thank you I totally agree❤

@OneHappyWidow 2 ай бұрын

Thanks for sharing your feedback

@jamesvowels2972 2 ай бұрын

I lost my wife 7 years ago it's been rough but listening to you brings me peace Thank You So Much Love Your Inspiration to keep going ❤️❤️

@jessicavaia2122 6 ай бұрын

Hi Leo welcome back great video!

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching #widfam

@melindabarefoot4612 6 ай бұрын

I can relate to the menopause. Hot Flashes have been bad, and being so tired felt like it came out of nowhere. Oh, and the hair thinning is no joke either. I'm glad to hear you're doing better. Missed you!! I can explain the way I felt with the initial shock of my husband taking his life, on our 22nd anniversary. Shell Shock. It was like someone had shot a gun close by, and there was a ringing in my ears, I was going through the motions, but mentally I couldn't wrap my mind around it. December 4th will be nine years, and our family is torn apart. My children blame me, and I haven't seen or talked to them in two years. I became a grandma on Christmas Eve last year, and my son won't let me see the baby. I just wish their daddy could see just how much our lives are Not Better, since he's gone. Our boys were 11 and 15 at the time he passed away.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

I'm so sorry you have had to go through all this, Im sure your grief is a mix of so many different emotions. One of my children has also gone no-contact, and will not allow me to see my only grandson either. It is so tough!

@lalaaa6019 6 ай бұрын

Widowed for 9 years with 9 yr old twins😢 widowed at 27

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry #widfam

@encouragingword1172 4 ай бұрын

Oh my goodness! The roller coaster of emotions and events you must have endured! May God Bless you so much! Hope you and your twins are doing ok.

@CarolynDick-r4f 6 ай бұрын

My Husband Phil died 7 years ago Good Friday April 14th 2017 Love and Miss him so much

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry #widfam

@BicyclesConfusion 3 ай бұрын

So sorry for your loss.

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@jaelinn2876 6 ай бұрын

My husband passed 7/7/24, 5 days ago in an auto accident . We were married 32 years. We were separated so his death has been devastating.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry that you are going through this complicated grief journey.

@sylviaAguenther-zc9lg 6 ай бұрын

Hi there, sorry to hear of this terrible incident in your life, many of us who have gonna through the same shock R holding a lot candle of strength to help U through. Turn to a friend here if the day& night seems unbearable, here 4 u if I need to text/talk😢😢💖💖stay in peace

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@almacristinaroman507 5 ай бұрын

Thank you for this video and for all the work you do around this topic. Although I don’t resonate with everything you talk about here as my life is different and I am a different type of person, I feel 90% of what you described and I retained 2 things. First is that our husbands would give anything to live smaller or bigger things that for us don’t bring any joy or meaning and we should find those. Second is that it gets easier in time, because although the situation and the pain are there it’s us who change and find ways to cope with all that. How do you find reasons and purpose and strength to continue living that kind of life? Where half of you crushed and in constant pain? I find it very hard to go on like that for the rest of my life

@OneHappyWidow 5 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback. As for how we go on, I try to take it one day at a time. There are good days and bad days, and I have to remember that neither will stay the same for long. I make lists, and set new goals so that I have a purpose and things I’m working towards.

@edmundpotrzeba6094 19 күн бұрын

In total honesty what i noticed about you was your smile .

@OneHappyWidow 14 күн бұрын

Thank you for your kind words.

@melb2258 5 ай бұрын

Mine was 4 yrs 7/31/2020. He passed away due to Covid, while in a VA facility. I thought I would move on without a hitch. Wrong. It’s been a journey that I wasn’t prepared for. So I got very close to God. Instead of getting into a relationship I got into a relationship God. It’s been 4 yrs, but I think I still have more to be on my own. To raise my 14 yr old son. God helps you in ways you never thought. God helps through grief, darkness, alone. Ive accepted and am comfortable with the thought of staying alone for the rest of my life, if need be. We can make it! Single moms have God.

@OneHappyWidow 5 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback

@chrisjohnson-l4n 14 күн бұрын

@irenemojocoa 6 ай бұрын

You look great!! Welcome back Leo!

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for your kind words!

@edmundpotrzeba6094 19 күн бұрын

I never knew my father but i still carry my polish grandfathers unconditional love with me into my old age.

@OneHappyWidow 14 күн бұрын

Thanks for watching

@kathyw4102 6 ай бұрын

Missed you, but I understand and take care of yourself.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for your kind message!

@NoodlesEaton 4 ай бұрын

October is my June. I hate October due to deaths and accidents.I gained 35 pounds. I am using intermittent fasing 16:8. I am so happy you are doing videos again. You were born to be a speaker and teacher! I love your channel! Your property is like heaven! p.s. I do not see the weight change in you.

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback. I’ve tried fasting and carnivore too, but it hasn’t worked. I’m actually taking medicine now to help with my insulin levels, and that’s helping a bit. Thank you so much for your kind words, it means a lot!

@IamGemini254 2 ай бұрын

Am a widow too. 10yrs now n it's not easy😢

@OneHappyWidow 2 ай бұрын

My pivot course might be helpful if you are still struggling with this: www.griefpivotcourse.com

@muma6559 6 ай бұрын

Good girl that you stepped up to positive changes to avoid things such as diabetes, so good that you didn't make things more complicated

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Yes, I'm trying my best to stay healthy. Dewey had diabetes in addition to so many other issues, so I saw how that affected him too. Thanks for watching.

@JesseUnderwood-m8b 6 ай бұрын

HEY just want to say YOUVE got this!I believe that what ever is thrown our way,GOD has it in control.I can tell your a beautiful person inside ,I only take one day at a time ,because you not promised tomorrow .I believe GOD put you and your new husband together for purpose?I wish you and yours the most happiness that can be,for the rest of your time on this earth.GOD bless and enjoy life for it is LOVE.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback. I do believe God sent my current husband to me, and me to him- we have certainly helped each other through some tough times!

@janethendrickson6705 6 ай бұрын

Welcone Back#!!❤

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks, it’s good to be back!

@laurieschwarzrock7724 4 ай бұрын

It’s hard I feel so broken miss my husband

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

I totally understand!

@therealjplavoie 8 күн бұрын

Met this Lady, She lost her long time boyfriend in a car accident not to long ago. She`s a great lady. I was looking for advice on how to deal with all of this..

@OneHappyWidow 5 күн бұрын

I’m sure many of my videos can be helpful to you. Thanks for watching!

@tinahauser8864 6 ай бұрын

I have a question - do you still quilt?

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

I actually don’t enjoy quilting (I have tried it), but I do love to sew, and I still love it.

@mounijani1154 5 ай бұрын

I lost my husband 20 days back a small misunderstanding between us he hung himself and left me we have been married together for 8 years ...i dont know how to live without him i just want to go to him all i want to say is sorry and i love him very much we have been allmost fighting because of his alcohol addiction and my anger issues but we do have lot of sweet memories we dont have kids ...i cant imagine my future without him i am totally lost...hope he will be at peace in heaven ...waiting for my death to meet him

@OneHappyWidow 5 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry for your journey. Praying for you #widfam

@irenebent7351 5 ай бұрын

Please be strong, you can get over this but it will take time. Don’t blame yourself, your husband was an alcoholic and not of sound mind. That is what led him to do it not what you said. God bless

@kgb2905 6 ай бұрын

Go out and get IT.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Every day!

@kgb2905 6 ай бұрын

@@OneHappyWidow yes every day.stop being satisfied with poor performing partners. They must be GOOD and thats it.

@kgb2905 6 ай бұрын

@@OneHappyWidow IF EVERY DAY ,YOU ARE MY TYPE.

@MM-yi9zn 6 ай бұрын

The loss is permanent especially in a very long marriage. You just have to plod on day by day.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Yes, this is true!

@edmundpotrzeba6094 19 күн бұрын

Id like to get back to that hairstyle that i had when i was first married but as iv lost most of my hair theres nothing the hairdresser said he could do about it , on the bright side i dont have to pay him £30 to make a mess of my previous wavey locks .

@OneHappyWidow 14 күн бұрын

Same here, it’s just too much money to pay for all that upkeep!

@autobotdiva9268 4 ай бұрын

i cut off all his friends after one of them made a nasty comment to me. havent seen them in over a year.

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

I wish this wasn’t as common as it is..but so many widows have said this!

@19snoopy64 6 ай бұрын

Congratulations on getting married again.

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thank you it has almost been 5 years now.

@19snoopy64 6 ай бұрын

@@OneHappyWidow Sweet.❤

@sharilynnpalmer7435 3 ай бұрын

I have a hard time having sympathy for you. I remember you saying your husband wanted to go to the ER he was so sick. You told him to call his mother for a ride who was several hours away. He waited for his mom and you went to bed. Then married in no time.

@OneHappyWidow 3 ай бұрын

I understand that not everyone can empathize. We all make our choices and then must live with them. I try to learn from my choices each day. Thank you for sharing your feedback!

@marshamagic8551 2 ай бұрын

Wondering about your former in laws..

@OneHappyWidow 2 ай бұрын

Just my late husband’s mother. She doesn’t contact us much, and typically stirs up drama when she does.

@annegiarratana7744 6 ай бұрын

Are you drinking coke? No,no,no

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

No, its Diet Coke

@anneturner2759 6 ай бұрын

I just heard a little more about your husband always wanting to be a dad . Please allow me to say that this sucks and it is NOT fair ! ❤️‍🔥 How is your husband doing with his grief are you further along ? Is he ?im curious..

@OneHappyWidow 6 ай бұрын

Thanks for your feedback. My current husband is now 5 years out and I’m 7 years out. We are helping each other cope.

@marshamagic8551 2 ай бұрын

You look sad.

@OneHappyWidow 2 ай бұрын

It’s definitely a process. Some days are better than others!

@orthodudeness 4 ай бұрын

This helped me along..... I have something here to share. I have tried to copy and paste the original, youtube doesn't allow that in a reply post. So, I have written out a copy here. Use this and do something like this. I found it tucked away in my wife's jewelry box after she passed from dementia on 3/19/2023. Took me to my knees when I found it. It's from 7/25/2007. She kept it all those years. I wondered did she know how much I loved her??/= Did I love here enough? Got my answer when I found this. We were together for 37 years. Here it is.... I work at home, way to many hours as my boss is the toughest around. My week starts on Sunday, sometimes goes till Sunday. My hours are long, my choice as well. I'm sitting working my tail off last Sunday. in comes Linda. She had been out in the pasture fooling with the horses. Huge smile, glowing eyes, COMES INTO MY WORK, to tell me about all the butterflies in the pasture. So numerous at one point she said she could feel the wind from their wings on her face some got so close. Put a complete stop to my progress. Butterfly jabber went on for a few minutes, complete shutdown of progress for me. Then she goes back out to finish her busy day. There I sit thinking, I hope that if I were created, or here by chance, whatever, cosmic muffin, hairy thunderer, whatever.... Please whatever it is or isn't...let me live and breathe just one more day...one more breath..so that my wife can come and completely WASTE MY TIME like that again. I must say I enjoy numerous occasions like that working at home. Helped largely by living where we do, surrounded by wildlife and forest. You guys like stuff like that? Someone sharing simple totally wonderful moments with you?? I get those feelings in my roll off observatory, but not as intense as with Linda and her butterflies. Health, Love, and Wealth to you all, and time to enjoy them.

@OneHappyWidow 4 ай бұрын

Thanks for sharing that beautiful moment and incredible lesson for us all!