A Comprehensive (and heinous) History of Pickup Artistry | hint: it only got worse 🤢

[@AdaOnDemand]

hey y'all! So KZbin is OBSESSED with demonetizing my videos 😂 and I'm thinking about making a Patreon so that I don't have to censor myself as much. What would y'all want as bonus content???

[@abookishmess]

Yessssssss

[@Nana-js1gs]

Absolutely

[@nikkydalby7126]

Make that Patreon 🙌🏻🙌🏻

[@LilyAlcee]

Mini videos! I am craaaaving more content from you so just like casual discussions or little rants would be totally cool with me lol

[@annamegenity]

agreed w others, literally anything. vlogging, lookbooks, lil opinion pieces, all good

[@uhu1747]

guys be like "too misogynistic to like women, too homophobic to like men" 💀

[@taureansun1501]

Oh the truth in this

[@AdaOnDemand]

they're not ready for this conversation 👁👁

[@lauralvw8445]

Hahahahha this is to accurate 😂

[@astoldbynickgerr]

☕️

[@ddjsoyenby]

"don't mind me just a pit stop on your way to 1nc3ltown than m@ss sh00t3r city"

[@a.mejia24]

1970: Tell her her lips are beautiful in the library. 2005: Psychological warfare.

[@AdaOnDemand]

The switch up was so SO concerning!! And the fact that they somehow blamed women seeking equality for why the "nice guy" doesn't work anymore was so odd as well

[@scarebear1265]

Jesus

[@melp5424]

all pick-up dating advice: manipulate them

[@ddjsoyenby]

"remember being ab**1ve is the only way to get f3m@l3s" - every pua.

[@mllezhn1612]

"Tell me ur a rapist without telling me ur a rapist" to put it in tiktok terms lol

[@thedon3747]

Exactly

[@ussinussinongawd516]

@@ddjsoyenby bro I read families not females

[@TheBunnyBeatdown]

Real shit I had a guy persistently hit on me at a gay bar. Trying to "neg" me and I was so offended that I kept walking away and HE KEPT TRYING. SIR I AM AT A GAY BAR TO AVOID THIS. I was having fun until that point. The night ended with me having to beat him with my car bat because he grabbed me while I was getting in my vehicle. I had a hand print bruise on my left arm for 2 months. He had a concussion. I am not brave. I for once was lucky. Many people who experience sexual assault and harassment are not. This is the one time I was able to get away. Know that there are times where no matter what weapon you have or what self defense skills you aquire that you may not always be lucky and that is not your fault. It is never your fault.

[@AdaOnDemand]

First of all I'm so sorry this happened to you. I'm glad you made it out of that situation and I'm glad you showed him the business end of your bat! There are so many women who aren't as lucky, and almost every woman I know has been sexually assaulted or harassed at least once. The sense of entitlement that defundsimping and other pick up artists preach has real world consequences like these, and they aren't discussed enough 😭 Thank you so much again for sharing your story ❤️

[@Lill2895]

Woooow I feel you sis! I love hanging in LGBTQ+ bars and clubs with my friends of the community. But I've seen straight cis men enter these spaces specifically to try and pick up women regardless of sexuality. It's so gross and annoying that they feel entitled to spaces and bodies that are not at all meant for them. I'm glad you keep protection with you and that he got those consequences served physically. I hope you never have to use that bat on a night out again! And I hope that creep is somewhere akin to hell rn.

[@jpmackey1607]

Sorry that happened to you, but I’m glad you stood up to that creep.

[@jpmackey1607]

@@Lill2895 Yeah, these men’s actions sound predatory to me.

[@msgirly6827]

I will never, ever understand negging. Like who does it actually work on? Because I can assure you, if you come out of the gate trying to neg a woman who has even the littlest sense of selfrespect and selfesteem, she will stand up and remove herself from that situation. Like how are you going to start of horrible? Thats only going to worsen if you ask me.

[@shaepsycho]

Saying Females is such a red flag.

[@AdaOnDemand]

^^^!!!

[@chxrbb_dxllhouse5403]

Teaching my brother to stop

[@GAZ3ll3]

My sister keeps saying "f e m a l e" but she looks up to a bunch of male rappers so... and whenever i tell her. "Why dont you just say women, saying female is how you refer an animal" and she was like "its not that deep, thats the thing you think about, wow" she is kind of a pick me, so i dont get into it with her about that

[@narcisoanasui246]

I’m saying

[@bunnyrabi]

Ikr, even in Chinese people in China recognize the term female/male is too strange and offensive when talking about people.

[@cosmicsongbird3047]

The men that sexually harassed all those women to the point of even harassing TEENAGERS do NOT deserve to be around people ever again! NEVER record people without their consent no matter what.

[@AdaOnDemand]

It was also so disheartening because some of the pick up artists didn't even bother to blur the faces of the women they would harass 😪 I had to censor one of the woman's faces myself for this video so not only did they record them without their consent, they didn't even have the decency to protect their identities :(

[@tarzanjane9592]

Girls and grown women can't walk down the street without somebody trying to pick them up

[@EldenaDoubleca5t]

God pickup artists would be such good cringe comedy if people didn't take them seriously 😬

[@fruitygarlic3601]

It's you! It's you!

[@AdaOnDemand]

This is so so true like I found myself laughing at some of defundsimping's videos because they are genuinely so ridiculous but then I would see comments like "💯 facts" in the comment section and I was like 💀 wait-

[@paccinocappaccino]

@@AdaOnDemand not them saying facts 🤣🤣🤣

[@bobsburgers8497]

@@AdaOnDemand you’re so pretty, you look a lil bit like loni love 💕

[@asmrcity3147]

Yeah this tiktok guy seemed to be trolling once he realized how many views his silly video got but guys really do think that way.

[@maida.589]

the delusion that has plagued these men is embarrassing 😐

[@AdaOnDemand]

It's really quite shocking sometimes 💀🤚🏾

[@TheShows247]

Yo why are our profile photos almost the same I picked this photo randomly

[@maida.589]

omfg same no way!

[@maida.589]

they are the same lol

[@TheShows247]

@@maida.589 mine is slightly turned clockwise but yeah probably the same original photo or something

[@estrellasjournal]

*i think the fact that it’s called pickup “artistry” we’re already giving them too much credit*

[@fruitygarlic3601]

Someone in the comments of a video by Hbomberguy (one of the first men to make fun of PUA on this site) said something like, "Pickup artists and garbage men should switch titles."

[@AdaOnDemand]

That's a great point honestly, it makes it sound much more high brow than it actually is 💀😂

[@ColdAsDianne]

I used to think pick up artists make art by picking stuff off the ground 🥲

[@DM-nw5lu]

Well, THEY picked that name. For the precise reason of feeling better about what they're doing. They themselves know that their behavior is disgusting.

[@amandap7200]

Artisinal pick ups. Locally sourced, all natural. At the farmers market

[@LysSilvaLendo]

Me as a Brazilian woman being oversexualized my whole life 🤡

[@clarakf]

as another brazilian woman, i feel you 😔

[@amandaford8730]

It's kind of weird how no one addresses this as an actual issue. 😕

[@goldenglowable]

@@amandaford8730 hey actually one of you guys should make a video about it ! It would be really good to get your experience on it to show how real the issue is. ♥

[@skykaneshiro5984]

Me as an Asian woman also being sexualized as “exotic” 🤝

[@NathalieSnip]

Well as a Surinamses I know Brazil has a very sexualized culture, so I wouldn't be surprised. But it is annoying.

[@kport6219]

Pick up artistry has always been a mess. It's just tiring to see all these men view women as a monolith and not as people with diverse tastes

[@AdaOnDemand]

And what always mystifies me is that the women (the people they're supposedly trying to get) literally say again and again that they're way off base but they just don't listen I-

[@kport6219]

@@AdaOnDemand the absolute arrogance of it all is what gets me.

[@rosedalinevaletine6931]

Idk. There are things that work on everyone. Like treating them nicely and decently, listening to them and getting to know them at their own pace, and respecting them and treating them as an individual. I mean, these tips and tricks work on everyone, and it still loses me that people listen to these people and believe that they’re imparting a highly secretive piece of wisdom/knowledge, or even WORSE, pay them!!!!!☠️💀

[@msgirly6827]

@@AdaOnDemand Because apparently women dont know what they want. Like legit. A guy has seriously told me this.

[@annamegenity]

It's easy to call this type of thing "harmless," but this possessiveness and lack of self-responsibility can be so dangerous. Several of my hs classmates were murdered at a party by a dude who was rejected by his ex and was looking to take her and her friends out. This shit is serious. Thank you for making this content despite the demonetization; that's so frustrating.

[@AdaOnDemand]

First of all that is so horrifying about your classmates 😭😭 and honestly I’m even more frustrated by the demonetization because I really wanted to go into the sheer number of murders and r*pes that occur BECAUSE of this entitled “nice guy” mindset but I was afraid KZbin would take the video down. If I’d known they’d demonetize it I would have just gone for it! Because it’s a facet of this discussion that gets ignored all too often 😭

[@astoldbynickgerr]

I think I know what horrific incident you’re talking about. I am so sorry 💙

[@MM-zm9je]

A girl I knew was also murdered by her cousin when he tried raping her and she fought back...

[@catpace3074]

more women are killed by their male s/o's in the US every year than people die in the military :/ it's so sad, especially because most men i've met continue to believe that things like this are "harmless"

[@catpace3074]

also i know exactly which incident you're referring to, i knew one of the people that was killed as well :(

[@friendlyneighborhoodloser2639]

the sad thing is that there are definitely guys at my school who take this stuff seriously and then wonder why they’re single

[@jasper2572]

I see some of this in my friends and it’s very concerning I don’t what to do besides telling them they are wrong and trying to talk to them.

[@BrokeHomieTuan]

@@jasper2572 I am usually anti-bullying but maybe just... this once... 🤔😅

[@jasper2572]

@@BrokeHomieTuan No bullying but I will politely laugh at them

[@ddjsoyenby]

they're immature and probaly going through their pua phase they'll eventually grow and mature hopefully.

[@jasper2572]

@@ddjsoyenby let's hope!

[@peripateticmind8461]

While it's fun to laugh at how stupid these guys are, I'm actually really worried for the women they're harassing. While you mentioned some of the more high profile cases where they sexually assaulted women, I'm worried for the ladies or girls that suffered the mental abuse and might internalize that...

[@AdaOnDemand]

This is a great point! Getting approached on the street like this is so incredibly scary and draining, and people often don't address how the women these men constantly harass feel 😭 I read a great article where this journalist joins a "boot camp" run by a pick up artist, and she follows them as he literally trains his pupils to go up and harass women :( it's a disturbing read but it was interesting to see exactly how the rhetoric is packaged to these men. www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2019/nov/05/pickup-artists-teaching-men-approach-women-industry-street-harassment

[@peripateticmind8461]

@@AdaOnDemand TY for linking the article. It makes me freaking heated to read, but it's good to be aware of this bullshit 😤

[@fiskfraansmoegen]

Calling women "females" needs 👏 to 👏 STOP 👏 like SIR this is not animal planet Edit: did not at all expect my comment to get so much engagement and I thought I'd make a general clarification: I am well aware of the fact that humans are animals. That's not at all why I made this comment in the first place. Please read through the comment thread for specifications

[@TheLamehipster]

Yhea it's how my vet references my dogs, I have two females one male.

[@fiskfraansmoegen]

@@TheLamehipster Right?? It's so de-humanizing, literally!

[@fiskfraansmoegen]

@@gracefire9067 Yeah, I see your point! If males and females were used equally and in the same contexts I'd be much more okay with it, as you said just gotta make "male" just as widespread!

[@LynnTRoman]

My husband used female because they use the word in the military. But one day he was telling me about a "female" and I stopped him and had to ask if he was talking about a dog.

[@fiskfraansmoegen]

@@LynnTRoman I can imagine the confusion, I'd probably have asked the same thing!

[@10062898]

I’m getting BIG incel energy 🤣😭

[@sita1993m]

That's intentional because that's who they mainly target. There are several videos on youtube that talk about it.

[@haarika1605]

literally the defundsimping videos have "redpill" as a tag :(

[@kaisolomon5187]

@@sita1993m incels and pua's hate eachother, I used to be in those spaces in the manosphere before. Typically incels were people who once believed in pua stuff but gave up on it once they realized it doesn't work. Pua's are moreso a product of capitalism and how it negatively impacts dating.

[@istoleyoursugar2015]

“Why do you hate the opposite sex?”: Women: I was assaulted/abused Men: A girl broke up with me when I was a teenager Edit: I’m not saying that men don’t get abused and assaulted or that women can’t be abusers, I am just stating the reasons that I’ve seen the most.

[@just1desi]

This is sadly true

[@mylapie5981]

Facts

[@tacrewgirl]

Truth

[@ddjsoyenby]

we need to create better spaces to keep these guys from falling into pua and 1nc3ldom.

[@MENACE-km6bd]

@@ddjsoyenby I agree. Men don't get enough counseling from other men. Edit: GOOD men.

[@kimberlybrown2664]

Dude said $40 at Cheesecake Factory! Where dude?!! That right there tells me he's never been on a real date. These betas are super sad...

[@AdaOnDemand]

Okay I wasn't sure if my Cheesecake Factory was just expensive or something but there is NO way you're only spending $40 for two people at Cheesecake Factory 💀😂

[@just1desi]

He probably asked to spilt the check 😂 and then wondered why she wasn’t answering his calls or texts after

[@just1desi]

It was the 6$ date that had my eyes Popping. Did he take someone out for an icecream cone?

[@Lill2895]

I spent $50 on myself and that's not even counting the tip I gave lmao! And he said Cheesecake Factory like it was something luxurious.

[@kimberlybrown2664]

@@Lill2895 Right! Lol

[@emerycorner]

That intro made me want to un-bisexual.

[@bimbowithadegree420]

It very much made me want to lesbianify

[@kendrarasberry3078]

It’s why I self-identify as aromantic asexual, or specifically apothiromantic/acoromantic apothisexual/acosexual. (Apothi- An orientation defined by repulsion. Whether or not they feel a type of attraction is irrelevant to them due to their repulsion towards the idea of being in that kind of relationship; Aco- / Acor- Having a strong aversion to engaging in sexual/romantic relationships due to bad experiences, apprehension, or other misgivings about being involved in romantic relationships or sexual activity, etc.)

[@warmhoney5829]

@@kendrarasberry3078 wow its nice to see a fellow asexual here

[@kendrarasberry3078]

@@warmhoney5829 Nice to meet you too.

[@astoldbynickgerr]

@@kendrarasberry3078 woah! i had no idea that was a thing! thank you so much for kind of breaking it down; i’m going to do more research about it. thank you! 💙

[@ApplesThatRead]

A historian, a comedian, a director, an editor, a commentator, an icon.

[@AdaOnDemand]

I want this read out every time I enter a room 😂 thank you so so much!! ❤️❤️

[@AdaOnDemand]

also I'm so sorry for the red eyes 💀 pollen is an enemy of progress

[@miscpersonalities]

ill remember to use that. "my eyes are red because of the pollen"

[@AdaOnDemand]

...it definitely is convenient sometimes 💀😂

[@esme5250]

"pollen"

[@carinecampier]

@@AdaOnDemand hi, just curious, have you tried a whole food plant based diet to combat your allergies? I know several person for whom it worked... 🤗 (Edit) I subscribed and thumbsupped this video to support your work. This message need to be spread. I wish we could do something to help / educate those young men... This world seems to be running havoc.

[@BellesView]

Girl I feel you. As soon as spring starts in Georgia, the pollen count skyrockets 🙄

[@kyliesmith621]

Tell me why they’re like “it’s gross if she has a body count over 3” and then 8 SECONDS LATER they’re like “if she makes you wait for sex, she’s wasting ur time and if she does I’ll just use her and not speak to her again and all you guys should do the same”. Make it make sense to me. Also not all guys are the same but I’ve literally heard guys say these 2 contradicting things in the same sentence before...

[@hellenmuka7207]

I'd tell them that my body count is 2 and I want to keep it there...3 for me is dangerous....so they know sex is off the table ..

[@kyliesmith621]

@@hellenmuka7207 lmfao😂😂

[@aimemaggie]

These videos really make me question my attraction to men

[@astoldbynickgerr]

And that’s okay! Every day my attraction to men dwindles and dwindles. There’s only about a drop of water left in the well now.

[@aimemaggie]

@@astoldbynickgerr same!! wouldn't be sad if the sun came out and evaporated it

[@_ayannaxo]

Right! I really thought I was bisexual but these videos helped me realize that I'm not attracted to them...at all.

[@emilyau8023]

I used to think this way, but we gotta remind ourselves that not all men are like this. There are many men like this and it's sad. We also have to think about that the "good" men suffer from misogynists as well because they tell them they're not manly enough. Women and men have to work together to go against sexism.

[@cloudyheart5148]

Are you bi? I know straight women say this too but it's sounds like alot of you might be bi but maybe was in denial and needed this because I hear from lot of wlw folk about how they just lost all faith in men.

[@senpainoticedyou6182]

Why are some people so adamant on being so needy into being in a relationship or getting laid. Sweeties go to therapy, Those pick up artists are mostly Misogynists and most likely haven’t gotten into a relationship for a verrrrry long time💀

[@ddjsoyenby]

agreed.

[@abirami9481]

A-are you my senpai?

[@kaisolomon5187]

Puas don't want relationships, they are too misogynistic for that, they just want casual sex. As creepy as they are, some of the shit they do must be working for them if they keep on doing it. This isn't me condoning their actions

[@OddBallRen]

@@kaisolomon5187 so why don’t they just go on tinder or a dating app. Those things are notorious for hookups

[@kaisolomon5187]

@@OddBallRen dating apps have a stigma. That and since they are pua's I can kinda understand wanting to meet people irl instead. But alot of pua's do use tinder. A fair bit of them also pay for sex in Colombia and lie about it.

[@honestlynotsponsored]

4:50 "Nah nah nah sister, you ain't getting me to no secondary location." - John Mulaney

[@AdaOnDemand]

STREET SMARTS!!!!

[@ladygrace7585]

J J BITTENBINDER STREET SMARTS

[@mariah6395]

The guy who went in straight for the kiss without even letting the girl know and without even asking? Not even leaning in slightly? He just fully smashed his face in, it made me sick to my stomach. You could tell how nervous and uncomfortable she was.

[@red_velvetcake1759]

Yeah that's sexual assault

[@Rampala]

I did not realize the PUAs had moved to TikTok. RIP Ada's brain cells. Your sacrifice shall not be forgotten.

[@AdaOnDemand]

Thank you 😭 finally closing tiktok after screen recording all of those felt like I was emerging from war 💀🤚🏾

[@drasc1470]

Whats even worse is tiktok flagging and removing rebuttal videos and comments to these types of videos under the guise of "harassment/bullying", while simultaneously keeping PUA videos up. I wouldnt be surprised at all if the content reviewing team was just a group of incels finally getting their way in society

[@KaylaNoelle1]

Men have literally berated me and told me “you need to be more friendly.” because I was in the middle of studying/writing an essay and I didn’t want to drop everything and go out with them... and I’m also not single. I’m turning 26 this summer so now I can just tell them “sorry I’m over 25, I’m ancient, I’m turning to literal dust. But if you know any milfs...”

[@OddBallRen]

“Dust”😂

[@hellenmuka7207]

Or I tell them...I've completely hit the wall ..stop wasting your time ..I'm 34

[@KaylaNoelle1]

@@BigSis-ig8pp I have two! hahaha

[@missfefeloves]

@@BigSis-ig8pp love it!

[@serenitybeats1677]

Lmao

[@picklespeas9623]

Pickup artists are just a pathetic excuse to be misogynistic towards women and its shown to other men as "aspiring". They really make me sick 😒. I love your videos!

[@AdaOnDemand]

Thank you so much! And it truly is such a thin veil for misogyny while still treating women as objects or a "goal" 😭

[@picklespeas9623]

@@AdaOnDemand its so disgusting 😖

[@mpoemp4703]

How sick do they make u?

[@emilyau8023]

They're man babies

[@kamilareeder1493]

🔥 YEET🔥

[@raquellie]

I LITERALLY just covered this in my women's and gender studies course last week! We read about how PUAs transformed into incels and it was both fascinating and disgusting to learn about. Really enjoyed this video!

[@AdaOnDemand]

Wow that's so cool! If you have any articles/further reading on the incel aspect (since I stuck to mostly PUAs) I'd love to read it!

[@raquellie]

@@AdaOnDemand for some reason youtube isn't showing the replies I've tried posting but the title is "From Pickup Artists to Incels" by Jack Bratich and Sarah Banet-Weiser!)

[@tacrewgirl]

@@raquellie thanks

[@TheMorganVEVO]

@@raquellie THANKS! Reading it now.

[@kaisolomon5187]

Sounds strange considering that incels don't believe in self improvement and pickup at all. But it is believable

[@naomirhoja6539]

“mastering the art of seduction” sounds weird to me, it’s like they look at us as animals that they hyper-sexualize. It’s the toxic masculinity for me🤢

[@larynadams1127]

Female dating advice i find is more on the "Unlock your Feminine energy" side of both tiktok and youtube and I feel like they mirror some of the same toxic ideas as pick up artist when if comes to women and how they act. A lot of them tend to be either anti feminist or hold misogynistic ideas too.

[@AdaOnDemand]

This is very VERY true. Though I think the majority focus on more on female empowerment and "unlocking your feminist energy", I have seen several who actively denigrate feminism and seem to have a lot of internalized hatred :(

[@ddjsoyenby]

yeah don't listen to these people.

[@alexvicari3241]

Feminism was originally about choice and autonomy. The problem today is that feminism has gotten to the point where women have developed many traits that don’t necessarily make you more attractive to men such as how much money you make or being to argumentive. All men really are want is a feminine woman who is cooperative and attractive to them.

[@DejH]

@@alexvicari3241 “who is cooperative” 🗿 sir that sounded very much 1950’s to me I’m pretty sure that isn’t what you meant but no.

[@alexvicari3241]

@Kriztin Cruz they are men just they just typically have more feminine energy. When in history have powerful men wanted to be dominated or seen as equal to a woman? Btw I’m not saying men are better than women but their roles are just different. Feminism as it is currently has changed the dynamics of men and women to varying extents.

[@lud3445]

I'm a straight woman and I SWEAR the way men act and talk so entitled makes me question if I should just give up

[@hellenmuka7207]

Oh....I'm open to eating kitty at this point...

[@mewesquirrel6720]

You have to be born gay so ..

[@jebethrubes]

I know we had to watch this defundsimping for Educational purposes, buttttt I lost brain cells in that part lol

[@AdaOnDemand]

I truly had to take breaks during editing because it was getting so annoying 💀 😂

[@ddjsoyenby]

i'm trig3nd3r........all of them were 0ff3nded by that.

[@estrellasjournal]

*the way you mocked them and knocked at the camera i-*

[@maddiepaddy2608]

why do you always comment in bold

[@justcocoatv2336]

These men are all cringe. I can’t imagine any woman wanting to date them. I don’t know who hurt them but they need help.

[@kaisolomon5187]

In the patriarchal society, we all often contribute to this by rewarding the behavior. It's a sad reality but alot of these guys are successful with women.

[@alexvicari3241]

Nice guys finish last because they come across as weak or too accommodating to women, especially if it’s too soon and/or without being earned. Women will often try to get as much attention and time out of them without any intention of taking them serious. With that being said there is a line and most guys have to be careful to tiptoe this line if they don’t look a certain way or have a certain status.

[@kaisolomon5187]

@skylarz I can believe it. Alot of them have receipts. A common thing I see women do to try to dismiss these guys is try to deny that these dudes have any level of success. It's a sad reality but alot of them do have some sort of success, ofc they are grifters and play it up but it's not hard to believe that at least some of them are successful. I don't condone their work because it is pretty harmful on both ends to varying degrees.

[@kaisolomon5187]

@M A I agree

[@Alena-xoxo]

@@alexvicari3241 You realize that it's not nice guys that finish last it's the the pushovers who have no boundary part. This goes for men and women alike. When you dont have any boundaries how can you expect anyone to respect you when you don't respect you? I was once upon a time tht girl with zero boundaries with one man and wound up in situation where I wld feel as tho nice girls don't get shit from it so what's the point lol until I took accountability and established some boundaries that's when things shifted majorly.

[@kimberley3577]

she said "ah". The west African jumped out😂😂😂

[@AdaOnDemand]

LMFAO I actually said nawaoh in another part of the video but I had to cut it out 😂

[@globisdead]

@@AdaOnDemand yo I wish you didn't 😭😭

[@moderndaymedusa82]

This is genuinely terrifying and I'm glad I don't have daughters. Now I just need to raise respectful sons.

[@astoldbynickgerr]

You got this‼️

[@starshine684]

I’m sure you’ll do great at raising them.

[@emilyau8023]

I hope all goes well. Even incels had good mothers...

[@floralthief]

please be aware to some degree of what they’re looking at online; there has been plenty of incels whose mothers were great but were radicalized online

[@graceblossoms130]

@@floralthief exactly

[@JulianSteve]

I was not going to comment on this video, but I must. Defundsimping’s logic on “smashing” women within three dates (or before that) is poor thinking. Not everyone wants to give out their bodies to just anyone. Some people like to take things slow or wait until marriage. Then, some of his viewers are young male teenagers/men and they will think this logic is “okay.” Sure, he thinks most of his viewers are older, but you have to use your word choices wisely online. I know, it’s not his job, but at least give a disclaimer... On top of that, his logic gives me sexual harassment/assault/rape vibes... This is not okay and I hope he changes his approach on TikTok or the account gets deleted... Profiting money while corrupting society, especially the youth is sick... We have enough predators out there, we do not need more.

[@AdaOnDemand]

Exactly, and something I find so concerning about the "three dates" rule is that it empowers his followers to then pressure or push the people they're talking to into doing something they might not actually be comfortable with. :( this type of rhetoric is so harmful for younger men who might not know any better

[@angygremlin4423]

I'm also confused by the "three dates" rule because a lot of these kind of guys (maybe a little less with PUAs when compared to incels/neckbeards, although some PUAs definitely seem to hold incel beliefs) only value women who they feel aren't "sluts/whores". Yet they expect unrestricted sexual access to a woman within a very short period after their first date/social interaction. If this kind of sexual contact occured with any other man, they'd dismiss the woman as immoral and unworthy of their "affections". How does that make sense? It seems like they can't see the blatant hypocrisy.

[@rose-gl4io]

Omg yes, I'm not avoiding sexual encounters because I don't like you. It's because I'm waiting until marriage dimwit.

[@ioanturcu5795]

But as a man, as long as you don't do anything harmfull to the other person, are you not entitled to cease contact if your desires are not met? In this case, a man's desire to have sex in the first 3 dates. Or are men not allowed to desire such a thing?

[@American_negroid_woman]

@@ioanturcu5795 Then be a man about it and say it to her face that is the reason so she know what type of person you are.

[@sarahjoyce267]

What that guy was saying was terrifying! You’re right, basically cult status 😰

[@AdaOnDemand]

Exactly!! And there are always a TON of women in the comment section of each of his tiktoks saying that his advice is trash so he made a video telling his male followers not to believe them because the women were trying to trick them 💀 I was like what in the Jim Jones is going on here 💀💀💀💀

[@TheMorganVEVO]

It explains *everything* though. We talk about the pipeline into racial bigotry pretty often on this platform. But we don’t talk about how their first step into that abyss often starts in the PUA community. There’s an overlap between racial competition and sexual competition. They’re sometimes just as radicalized about sex as they are about race.

[@emilywumbozeko]

This just shows that people need to be taught emotional maturity (especially straight men). Like if people were just straightforward about their feelings and intenions, dating would be so much more simple and all these games wouldn't be needed. Even the girl dating coach was telling girls to be engaged and then ghost. People should just talk to someone if they like them and don't talk to them if they don't. It should be that simple

[@bm-mx5tk]

Yessa striaght men are so lost lol

[@alexvicari3241]

💯💯

[@ussinussinongawd516]

Gay men have this too 😭

[@thekojiwolf]

It will always be strange to me that men listen to other MEN when it comes to what WOMEN want. Wouldn’t it be better to ask a woman???

[@nightfrost1891]

i'm guessing it's the type of men who don't ever respect women's opinions even if it's about how to date them

[@hellenmuka7207]

They don't ask their own mum's for any advice....should tell you something...every romantic comedy has men asking his 'bros' or 'dad' or 'sensei'

[@shadowbanned6358]

Lol the irony is that men like this are dead inside and inevitably meet a woman they fall for, only to be humiliated & rejected by them, which is why they became pick up losers to begin with, therefore completing the self-fulfilling prophecy of self-hatred & self loathing. Karma is a *****

[@CyberStockholmSyndrome]

When men approach me on the street I just walk as quickly as possible and pretend like I don’t hear them. Especially if I have headphones in. Unfortunately I think we, as women, are taught to be polite even if we’re uncomfortable. Plus, there’s the added benefit of possibly being threatened with violence if we ignore/reject some men. It’s really a lose/lose situation.

[@kyliesmith621]

Yeah girl. I am ngl sometimes I just want to be left alone (ESP WHEN I HAVE HEADPHONES IN) and just live in my own world while I am walking, shopping etc... So it’s annoying when they come up to you. It’s not only annoying but my anxiety skyrockets cause I just never know their intentions.

[@citrinestone6884]

Honestly 😩 Sometimes I just wanna go buy some juice w/out being cat called or followed by a car

[@ananaspryde5687]

I do exactly the same. At this point, i do not care if it Comes across as rude. I just wanna go home in peace

[@cynicismIncarnate]

I was trying to eat my damn slice of cake and then the TW section happened. My poor cake had to see that. 😡😡

[@AdaOnDemand]

Justice for Cake 😭😭😭

[@rissa_x]

who he feeding with $40 at cheesecake? what we got appetizers and water? no wonder it went no where tf

[@AdaOnDemand]

LMFAOOO that was the time when I knew he'd never gone on a date because who the hell gets away with spending anything less than $70 at cheesecake 💀

[@Viktoria-yn5yn]

prob the type to do coffee “dates” or walking “dates”, lmaoooo

[@ThatAwkwardGirl7]

I want to know how they treat their mothers.

[@abookishmess]

Never felt so much like a desert those dudes were gross 🤣🤣 like the only thing you gonna get out of me from berating me is a fight 👏🏾 Also the nice guy always wins even if they don't get the girl you still have integrity and respect.

[@AdaOnDemand]

Yeah I've never understood the negging tactic because when a guy disrespects me or my friends we dip 💀 so idk who that works on but it sure as hell isn't me 😂

[@genuinepessimist5185]

These guys have it so wrong too. I was casually dating and not looking for a relationship and I went on a date with my now boyfriend. He was so respectful and didn’t even try to kiss me on the first date. Our second date we kissed in his room and he didn’t even suggest going further. He was so respectful of me and my boundaries and really paid attention to me and getting to know me. I was so impressed I kept going on dates with him and fell in love. These pick up guys are so toxic and they have it SO wrong.

[@990doglover]

As someone who refuses to download tick tock, thank you for making this lol

[@yourfavoritecloud7307]

Lmao same

[@AdaOnDemand]

I've got you!! 🥰🥰

[@thecheshire5762]

Downloaded it once, deleted it a day later. Never again!

[@nnelson4557]

“One day it’s this registry...probably in the near future another” 😂😂😂 I’m weak

[@AdaOnDemand]

I'd pay to see a cross reference of the two registries because 💀 some of those posts were genuinely concerning

[@peace3405]

That trigger warning was very much so appropriate

[@AdaOnDemand]

Yeah the full video of that encounter is somehow even harder to watch, it went on for like 3 minutes and they didn't even bother blurring her face, I had to do it myself to protect her identity 😭😭😭

[@toastedgraymonds2744]

These guys are on a whole new breed of "nice guys" 💀

[@dottyContrarian]

it's just "mean guys" at this point

[@toastedgraymonds2744]

@@dottyContrarian Yeah they are just "mean guys" at this point

[@steppenfuchs5608]

@@toastedgraymonds2744 “nice” guys were always mean.

[@toastedgraymonds2744]

@@steppenfuchs5608 yeah but these are the mean guys of the nice guys. The nice act backfires so hard it makes it easier to know that they're dicks

[@SavageMinnow]

@@toastedgraymonds2744 that's been happening for decades tho

[@Altair718]

These dudes have never had a healthy relationship with anyone, including themselves and it's clear as crystal. Folks need to seek therapy.

[@christopherlucik2395]

The conspiracy comparison is accurate, a LOT of these videos use the “red pill blue pill” reference from the matrix to make guys “wake up” and encourage them to be misogynistic um I mean encourage them to be not nice guys

[@AdaOnDemand]

Yeah he would even use the #redpill in his videos and I was like what are y'all waking up to??? Dying alone? 💀💀💀

[@copperfoil8373]

Contrapoints' video on incels is a good video on what happens when pick-up artistry is taken further and the radicalization aspect she touched on in this video

[@AdaOnDemand]

Oh I'll check it out!! I love Contrapoints, no clue how I missed that one!!

[@copperfoil8373]

@@AdaOnDemand yes!! Love contrapoints!!! When you were like the radicalization thing might seem dramatic I was like no ur totally right it very much is (also you should totally make a patreon your content is so good)

[@saigeferko6035]

Defundsimping: she needs to give you the goods by the third date or she's gone Me, on the ace/demi spectrum: 👁👄👁

[@Lytah84]

They dont believe we exist. 😬

[@purplehood8418]

*sweats in asexual*

[@TK_Danes]

Dating is a no right now for me.. My demi. Ass will just be annoyed

[@artalcoolique3341]

Also men: if she's even THOUGHT of sex, she's for the street.

[@saigie3908]

What’s an ace/Demi?

[@kerfuffle5722]

I started getting creepy comments on my body from men about when I was 15, which is hella creepy. And it wasn't a case of "I looked older than I am", which still isn't an excuse to make comments on ANYONE'S body, but I legitimately looked like a 12 year old when these comments started. It's very gross that they go for people who seem vulnerable and alone.

[@chickennuggets1753]

I been through the same I’m now 14 it’s disgusting I was wearing a big sister shirt Matching with my lil sister and still got cat called and I told a man at the time I was 13 he followed me half way to were I was going

[@anaribeiro975]

7:00 this bit stuck out to me so I googled it and... Y'all. The way these guys on disturbing blogs talk about foreign women is so gross. I'm Brazilian myself and it's not a shock to learn that some American men fetishize us (long story short, it's a national & international media problem) but these dudes specifically talk about Latinas, Asian women, Eastern Europeans etc like they're sexy, guillible playthings. The objectification is unparalleled. Maybe that's why some of the pick up artists have travel bans... Anyways. Great video! Very informative. And thank God those websites seemed niche. edit: I just watched itsjinakim's video "why is this tiktoker cancelled by asian women"... Apparently the blog dudes are on tiktok too.

[@AdaOnDemand]

First of all thank you so much for looking into this further, I'd love some articles and further reading if you wouldn't mind sharing, I'd like to learn more!! The fetishization of "foreign" women is so harmful and has such damaging consequences, and it was brought to the forefront with the horrendous shooting incident in Georgia a few weeks ago 😭 and it's still excused and rationalized away. I'll also check out the TikTok you mentioned!

[@anaribeiro975]

Regarding the fetishization of "foreign" women, I only really feel equipped to talk about Brazil, so... I think it can be largely blamed on media because of its portrayal of Brazilian women. I couldn't find a source in English for this but there's an infamous Infraero (a state owned Brazilian airport management company) ad, from the '70s, that portrays our women as a drawing point for tourism. A similar controversy actually happened recently tinyurl.com/h2zsytyh . Besides our own country having a history of sex tourism tinyurl.com/37w55nfy , as do other developing countries, international media doesn't help. They sell the narrative of Brazilian women being sex pots, and of our culture being promiscuous in general. It is born both out of misunderstanding it, and this whole fetishization thing being something that western hemisphere countries do... No idea why. I'm no expert, I'm just a curious college student. But this article was enlightening tinyurl.com/3jpm3cbs . There's also this opinion piece by a Brazilian woman talking about all this, but it's behind a paywall so I couldn't read it tinyurl.com/4krxyj93 .

[@anaribeiro975]

I have to admit, I feel ambiguous about broaching this topic... I fear I'm making my country look like the backwards sh*it hole some Americans (Trump?) seem to think it is, when to me at least it's pretty clear every nation has its problems, both economic and cultural, and its own "brand" of misoginy, racism, homophobia, transphobia... Besides, there is work being done to stop sex tourism ( tinyurl.com/4us93jna I fear this one's behind a paywall too, but I was able to read it), and it is decreasing. The feminist movement here has picked up a lot of strenght since the early 2010s, but it's existed for a lot longer. Anyways. I can really only speak for myself and what I've seen, and there's no sex tourism on my region. There were some actual academic articles about this stuff on google scholar, and Cheyenne Lin is an American expat living in Brazil and she has a few videos on Brazilian culture (some about objectification and media). Take all of this with a grain of salt, it's a huge country, lots of cultural differences. Anyways. Sorry for the lengthy comment, I'm passionate about this and had some free time. I hope this is helpful, or at least informative. (I had to shorten the links, the original comment was too long)

[@anaribeiro975]

I've been trying to leave another comment (about the weird blogs, with links and all...) but it's not working. Would emailing it work?

[@curiouscomrade8680]

In some blog post they even complain when foreign women know English fluently. This guy who went to Colombia (I think it was Colombia, this was a while ago, I don’t remember) was disappointed that the woman he was trying to get with understood everything he said. He was also complaining that many girls in Latin America were learning English, because according to him, that means “we’ve been Westernized”. I think that bothers them because they know we won’t put up with their bullshit.

[@K.Marie119]

Dude, I'm a medical student and if some guy came up to me while I was studying for my MCAT he wouldn't even get far enough for a handshake... especially if I was on the molecular biology portion. Now let him come up to me while studying for Step One of the USMLE... bring popcorn.

[@snowleopard3532]

Since you’re a mess student I recommend watching Cells at Work! It’s a funny anime about Cells in the body working together

[@candyisreading8813]

'These men are primed to be on the defensive before they even meet the individual woman that they're talking to.' Yes! So true! This is such a great video I love your content. A really interesting book on the 'manosphere' is called Men Who Hate Women by Laura Bates.

[@supersonicbro]

Thanks for this video. Do you think you'll ever touch on how this frame of thinking is extremely close to the religious guys who make videos of this sort about women and how they need to be more "submissive"?

[@AdaOnDemand]

That's a great suggestion!! Gonna add it to my list and do some research! 😊 Thanks so much for watching!!

[@kah023]

That is such a great point

[@alexvicari3241]

I believe that’s true if men are fulfilling their role as sole provider. If he is then I believe submission makes sense but most people today men and women contribute so it’s not as cut and dry.

[@botanicalitus4194]

@@alexvicari3241 no one should be submissive in a relationship unless that is specifically what they want and negotiated for... being the financial provider doesnt give you any extra rights or entitlements in the relationship. Housework and child rearing are extremely tasking jobs that stay at home parents do for free and they are never off the clock. "submission" and "dominance" are kinks, nobody us entitled to their partner being submissive or dominant for any reason whatsoever. If they both enjoy and agree to the kink then sure, but only if thats what they both want.

[@alexvicari3241]

@Flower Plant yes everything you said is true and that’s where choice comes in no one has to do anything. However in most cases when a man is going to work everyday to provide for his family and is the sole provider then naturally he wants a submissive woman because he wants that role to have final say. The woman’s opinion and input is still valued and considered but he will still make the final decision and does not want to be going back and forth with her. This is why it’s important to pick the right partner you can trust to make decisions so that taking care of the home which as you mentioned is hard work in itself it actually takes one less responsibility from from that person to focus on their duties.

[@rootedinland6823]

The fact that these men put significant time and effort into teaching young boys to completely disregard the humanity of women is deeply concerning. Like, this isn't someone being bitter about rejection or not being able to get laid (which is definitely a "them" problem, cause they're just fucking horrible people.) They are actively telling boys and other men that what women think and feel and want doesn't matter. They are teaching emotional and possibly physical abuse as the norm. It's disgusting and dangerous.

[@missfefeloves]

Right!

[@itsmist-er]

The irony is that they go around talking about how they're the dominant partner but also talk about how to trick girls into dating them or sleeping with them, indicating that they truly think women are more powerful.

[@SpurgeonGeneral46]

Why do men That’s it, that’s my question

[@ruthbabirye9776]

Lol Why are men

[@SimplyaLady92]

I have just one issue with your question. I think you meant to say, Why do boys 😆

[@xNaeja]

@@ruthbabirye9776 this!

[@r.b7979]

@@SimplyaLady92 idk i feel like ik what people mean when they say boys but at the same time at the end of the day these are in fact men. They may not act how a man should but they are :(

[@saml.purecats4695]

Excellent video! I think the worst thing we can do in dating is to generalize a whole gender. We end up not listening and interpreting with a very wrong lens.

[@AdaOnDemand]

Exactly!! thanks so much for watching ❤️🥰

[@gloriac.2795]

“It’s giving very much Ted Bundy so that’s more than enough of that” sucked the air from my lungs and slapped me across the face. Idk why that was the line but it killed me😭

[@imjustchilling41]

Dude your hair looks so nice you r gorgeous

[@AdaOnDemand]

Thank you so so much!! 😭❤️

[@XactlyCeSe1]

12:36 was so repulsive. My whole body got the shivers. She must’ve been terrified probably thinking he would hurt her if she didn’t nervously giggle at him. Poor girl 😖

[@minichou]

Those men who are on the more damaging side of this 'pickup' thing are honestly scary. I haven't even entered the dating world yet and I am already wanting to move to a different planet from that.

[@schokococoa575]

The exact reason why I’ve not entered the dating scene yet, it looks like such headache😭

[@cameronjowers7]

Pick up artists give me alt right pipeline vibes

[@AdaOnDemand]

Omg you're a psychic 💀 I'm also working on a script for the alt right pipeline and I was shocked by the parallels between these two topics!

[@tiredandwantsanap]

I swear some of the men I've met must have paid for pick up artist courses. I went on one date with a guy who spent the night negging me, complaining that he's a "nice guy" who gets friendzoned, and then when I refused to see him again, asked me set him up with my friends because we didn't really date. There's no way this man was this awful all on his own.

[@hellenmuka7207]

Ha...like why would you after all that...subject a good friend to him...

[@missfefeloves]

@@hellenmuka7207 lol

[@witchplease9695]

I always say I love good guys. Good guys are genuinely nice. “Nice guys” are manipulative.

[@hellenmuka7207]

Thank you....I hate people who use the word 'nice' as an actual complement to themselves ..it rings of red flags...smells of entitlement narcissistic vibes...

[@missfefeloves]

Yess

[@alicia379]

Watching cringe pickup artists getting owned by strong intelligent women(gaysand theys) is my favorite past time.

[@madijo762]

So this is why creeps always hit on me when I hung out the library! That somehow makes it so much worse!

[@ohshesglamorous]

That knock on the screen was so unexpected, I loved this video 😂

[@AdaOnDemand]

Haha thank you so so much!! 🥰🥰🥰

[@cyannepanda]

If you’re only dating to have sex you need to evaluate your priorities :/ it’s weird that these men don’t get some people date to actually form meaningful relationships 🙁

[@shelbyinmon8654]

I mean there are literally apps for ggao purpose like it's not that hard if your into that be upfront about it

[@robotroadrage]

Nothing wrong with just dating for sex as long as the feeling is mutual. This is why people should be upfront about what they want early on. These guys don’t seem to think that.

[@FabalociousDee]

12:33 I literally felt violent watching that. This has actually been done to me several times, but when it did, I usually just froze. It's only when I see it happen to another woman that I get angry. Blatant sexual assault & harassment. Disgusting.

[@murron1125]

Glad you’re feeling better! Pollen’s been kicking my ass as well 😩😩

[@AdaOnDemand]

Praying for you because it's really a battle out here 😭❤️

[@strudelh]

Idk why men can't just look at a women's point of view on it, since we know how we want to be approached or talked to. 💀

[@romanhill263]

I have never heard of pick up artists before, this is so fascinating. and horrifying at times

[@imjustchilling41]

Ma'am when did u blow up? Last time I checked u.had 13k subs congrats on the growth 👏🏿👏🏿

[@AdaOnDemand]

Yeah it's been a crazy month!! But thank you for continuing to watch 🥰❤️

[@imjustchilling41]

@@AdaOnDemand why I stop I love your content 💙

[@naledipilane4381]

“It’s giving personal trauma!!!!!!” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@SEReina-gk1kx]

To the guy with the “whole 3 strikes and you’re out” when it comes to having sex after a certain number of dates.....ummmm dude, what if she’s not interested in having sex period and just wants to get to know you?🙄 Cause ummmm I’ve been dating my boyfriend for 3 years and we have had no sex at all and we’re completely fine.

[@sailoroverdrive1434]

Amazing video! I loved the juxtaposition of 1970's dating with today's dating -- it's fascinating how these tips changed. I grew up watching a lot of 1960's and 1970's sitcoms like The Dick Van Dyke Show and I Dream of Jeannie, and even the shows back then made fun of guys with misogynistic views on "hooking up" and how it's actually sexual harassment. It's sad that even by 1960s standards, when mainstream society was purportedly closer-minded, modern-day PUAs would be considered absolute scum. Very influential in the forming of modern toxic PU-artistry were Neil Strauss's "The Game", Roosh V, and The Red Pill. "The Game" sold /a lot/, even to men already in a relationship but who wanted to cheat on their spouses or dominate them. It was written by Strauss and "Mystery", two PUAs who have since denounced the PUA sub-culture as toxic and misogynistic. Strauss has openly apologized for his book. Roosh V popularized the "manosphere" and introduced racism into the Game, by publishing books on which cultures to prey on for sex. He has also done a 180 since then: he's a Born-Again Christian who now advocates for chastity and monogamy. Virtually all male PUAs who were neck-deep in "The Game" and the "manosphere" have recanted their ideology as they approached middle age and realized that they had been young, sex-addicted assholes this whole time. A number of them became anti-misogyny and anti-PUA. The only exception to this are the Red-Pillers, who are alt-right and hell-bent on hurting women. There are two female counterparts to male PUAs. One was what you included in your video. The other one is a little more hidden, and it's called "The Female Dating Strategy", or FDS for short. FDS is closer to the toxicity of PUAs, in so far that they teach tactics involving manipulation and exploitation, and rely on a bigoted world view. They are also TERFs. While PUAs use emotional manipulation to coerce sex from women without emotional or financial investment, FDSers use emotional manipulation to coerce money from men without emotional or sexual investment. Both feature tightly-knit, cult-like communities that prey on people who've been scarred by a negative interaction with the opposite sex OR are struggling with sexual frustration. I've seen FDSers a few times trying to discretely recruit women on female-centric subreddits where said women posted about having "man trouble", and I always try to warn these women away from them (FDSers are very persistent, and will call you a lying shill, pick-me or a man in disguise if you foil their recruitment). If PUAs say things like "cut off a woman if she won't kiss you on the first date or wants you to buy her an expensive dinner", FDSers say things like "cut off a man who asks you out for coffee or plays video games or wants to be a stay-at-home dad."

[@loudmouthwife]

And all these guys aren’t married. Where’s the evidence of this working out for real? 😖 Also, love the video as usual!

[@Simmerdownidc]

I noticed that too. It's not about actual dating to be in a real relationship advice but just how to trick a woman to sleep with you.

[@msgirly6827]

Its not about an actual relationship. Its about power and sleeping with women they hate.

[@weepingwillow314]

Idk if this is just because I am a queer woman, but I never understood how being a rude person was ever going to be seen as attractive. We can see this in film, books and music, there's so often this idea that women owe their bodies and relationships to men, who can very often not be right for them. There definitely a rise in just hook-up culture, rather than trying to really get to know someone and like them for who they are, rather than what they can provide for you: sexual favours, etc. I don't know who these tactics are helping, because it doesn't seem to lead to anything healthy actually progressing. There's definitely some fears of a real committed relationship that a lot of young people experience. Honestly, the whole pick up culture seems pretty toxic and I never really understood how you can want to expect a random stranger to be interested in you, without knowing anything about you.

[@Anna-dw1zq]

thank you for speaking up about this 🙏🏼the girls here in our early 20s are already over it 😭

[@ReversibleCheesecake]

This is my new favorite channel! Smart✔️ eloquent✔️ funny✔️ beautiful✔️ top notch high quality videos✔️ ada is so underrated pls give this girl a million subs

[@usernotfound0703]

We share the same taste 😉😂

[@CocoGotSnacks]

The fact that a man literally asked me, “you wouldn’t die for me” at, what i felt was, the peak of the beginning of covid… proves to me that these type of people really exist… it’s not just an internet anomaly. Lmaoo that legitimately scares me 🥴

[@dorkatron8929]

Hell, if these PUAs are so confident in their “research” id love to see how they’d reaction to attempting to picking up each other.

[@alaspoyorick]

15:30 guy is giving me major serial killer

[@AdaOnDemand]

Yeah that TikTok 100% triggered my fight or flight 💀

[@Sto0necO0ld]

I’m so happy I stopped dating and made the decision to be happily single. Now I get to sit back and watch with my popcorn 🍿🥤, y’all be safe out here tho

[@missfefeloves]

I'm on the journey to doing this

[@ohsock.5501]

thank god im aroace, i'll never want to have anything to do with this 🙏

[@emmahardy5422]

40 bucks at Cheesecake Factory had him mad as hell 😂

[@4cme199]

Oh he BROKE broke

[@emmahardy5422]

@@4cme199 lol. I hope he got extra to take home at least

[@juggle_g7579]

Crazy well done, didnt even feel like 26 mins.

[@AdaOnDemand]

Omg yay!! I was so scared 26 minutes would be too long so I'm glad it was entertaining! ❤️❤️❤️

[@juliorosag]

I'm just starting to watch but I KNOW it's gonna be good

[@AdaOnDemand]

Thank you so much for watching!! ❤️❤️❤️

[@skylerpoduska]

When he said you can get it at a time at depression: like actually made me sick

[@fruitnoodle1]

I'm GenX, and the saddest part about this is that not only men were taught that women want aholes. Women were, too. So many of my friends are still single in their 40s trying to figure out why dating aholes and fboys leaves them with no one. And then they say "there are no good men", but they're wrong. My husband is short, bald, a little chubby, and shy. He is also kind, loving, passionate, smart, funny, and sexy. I wasted a lot of time with jerks, but I'm glad I came to my senses!

[@avien9068]

Well that's a point that a lot of these guys make. They see this kind of problematic behaviour works so they copy it. Guys see that some women are immature and pick the wrong guys so they think that they have to act like that too in order to be successful. It's a cycle that will probably continue to perpetuate itself for years to come

[@JennJustLeft]

I was recently exposed to alpha male tiktok. Your video started with dudes telling dudes: if a woman isn't willing to meet up because pandemic, she's not worth your time bc she isn't willing to risk dying for you. I want to focus on this because it sparked something. Those men are making a really good point for women to remember. I think we'll be in a better place if women continue to assume men are going to, at the very least, give them a viral infection (usually it's something sexually transmitted). I read a statistic that "the number 1 cause of death for females ages 15-59 worldwide is men. More specifically, women ages 15-59 die in this world primarily as a result of being f*cked by men". Example: If a couple wants a family, a woman needs to put her life at risk with a man even in a healthy loving relationship. Pregnancy is her risk for the survival of humanity. This biological reason means a woman needs to be absolutely sure that her partner is worth the risk and will do everything in his power to ensure she has a safe supportive environment to survive pregnancy and that the child survives and is also safe and supported. Access to legal abortions is constantly under threat. It is absolutely essential for women (even with access to abortions) to guard who has access to their wombs. Having sex is a life risk on a sliding scale as with everything. But why on earth would we want to f*ck around and find out? "Guys be like: too misogynistic to like women, too homphobic to like men" - youtube commenter uhu. Exactly. These men's access to women should be blocked. This requires coordination by women living with enough privilege to safely guard ourselves to remove that access. By not doing so, we the privileged women, are culpable. Too harsh? What's the alternative? F*ck around and find out. I'm sensing a time of great change for women of privilege. I hope we're all taking the time to connect and help teach each other to avoid these awful men. We need to bring more women into our supportive circles. Expose women to this. Teach women ways to date as safely as possible if they have a desire for a monogamous relationship. (I don't, at this time, believe any relationship that's non-monogamous is a safe one for a woman even if she's desires it. Thanks patriarchy) Women need to come together in business, in school, in organizations, clubs hobbies etc. and work together to de-center men from our lives. The women who are in a position to do so, will need to work to de-program patriarchal conditioning that's helping to keep other less privileged women fall victim to these men. If you are a woman who has the ability to choose to have casual sex with men. Stop. Listen. Your safety depends on it. If you pay for a man's rent, gas, food, etc. Stop. Think. Unless you're in a committed relationship and y'all are a family unit with combined finances, avoid all costs associated with the all too common situationships. If you give free therapy, free labor, free coaching to a man. Stop. Go. Put that energy into lifting up women and children. Women with privilege need to be the slightly less oppressed group lifting up the more oppressed group. Not the oppressed lifting up the oppressors. If you think you won't ever be happy single. Stop. Relax. This is conditioning. Women can help you work on re-conditioning so that you can cultivate a fulfilling life regardless of relationship status. If you think your clock is ticking. Stop. Breathe. Biologically sure it may be. But the risks are far too great to have some random unproven man's offspring if your time is running. Be proactive and protective if you desire children. Is it freezing eggs? Fostering/adopting? A sperm donor? Raising children in a community with other supportive parents so you're not relying on a husband if you haven't been able to find a worthy one in time? Women will find better ways to raise the next generations. If you want to be a homemaker, sahm, trad wife etc. Stop. Choose. Vet, vet, vet the heck out of any man who shows interest. Never stop vetting. Women choose men. Women must only choose a man who chooses her. And he must keep choosing her every day for the rest of his life. Love is a choice. He must make that choice to provide for their family, love and respect her, help and support her, never ever let her question his loyalty to their family unit. She must also be just as committed. Good couples have healthy competition between who can dote on each other the most. Good couples constantly try to outdo each other in showing affection with what ever that means for them as individuals. She makes his favorite food, - he buys her favorite flowers. Sounds basic? It's supposed to be. These things come easy for people when they love each other. If you're a woman often overly explaining and communicating to men. Stop. Understand. If he wanted to, he would. He would put in the effort it takes to get to understand you as you have done for him. If you tell him something bothers you and he doesn't change it, leave. Non-verbal communication is always happening. Don't forget that. Healthy couples know this and work to meet the needs of each other without needing to be verbally told all the time. If you're just having fights with men in the comments section. Stop. just stop. Go and try to convert a fellow woman. Maybe you can help her out of society's conditioning. Or you can f*ck around and find out.