A Romantic Relationship Is NOT All There Is

[@PrimordialAngels]

The problem I've come across is that I'm hyper aware romance isn't all there is-- but it seems the other people in my life are not at all aware of that, and whenever they find romance they instantly are gone from my life, leaving me with a void that they once filled. It has left me feeling like romance is my "last chance" for having a stable relationship with anyone. So yes... What Teal says is very true ;; I just wish others were aware of it and valued this teaching too...!!

[@ashley5899]

I tend to hyperfixate on a romantic relationship and even though I was somewhat aware that it is foolish to expect just one person to meet all my needs, just the thought of looking to other relationships feels daunting and overwhelming T^T

[@Brilindhart]

Yes!! It is so devastating to have close intimate friendships only for them to disappear once they get into a romantic relationship

[@pleun315]

@@ashley5899 u need to love yourself first before you can truly love another

[@pleun315]

@Mj no, more me me me me......that's all

[@bradleyfrank7933]

stop looking outside yourself for love and validation. The lesson is about loving self.

[@kathleendinsmore7588]

This is spot on. The problem with a lot of us is the inability to open up to people who can be real assets in our lives. Too many romantic involvements degenerate into repeat performances of parental neglect.

[@gokeogunremi7575]

Hmm. The same thing we were hurt by which we did not get healing from, and thus live avoiding only to be pulled back in.

[@Protesto2012]

Thank you I believe this to be true!! I would never have chosen my husband, it happened because we both listened to our inner voice and waited for what was right.

[@ikukuagu3458]

Great experience I had with you. dc oguamelu KZbin channel. for bringing my ex back to me with your spell casting after 4 years of separation and stroke cure.

[@jordansmith8547]

One person cannot satisfy all of your needs. When we put this burden on someone it pushes them away. Get your needs met in a variety of ways.

[@tashawilliams8093]

Exactly.

[@rudeegruenberg9184]

is it possible it not a burden if your kindful then its not hard to understand its called compassion

[@vesnakatic4056]

I think the most important relationship is the one we have with ourselves.

[@corinnemuir1542]

Someone was bound to say that. Good job being the one who did.🥳

[@stelliumX5]

That’s really all there is, as we all are one.

[@misselizmae]

And with God/higher powers etc

[@vesnakatic4056]

@@misselizmae Yes, that's it

[@daisy7141]

Yes, be good to yourself by not letting others, even your husband, trample on you.

[@cecilia1099]

I have a very strong longing for a true chosen family/tribe/community like I think you have Teal. This longing is even bigger than my longing for a romantic partner. I understand better why now. Thank you! ❤️

[@anaisaerksen]

I feel exactly the same

[@shameembunsie785]

Same

[@Unique2UGoddess]

Me too!!!

[@soulguidedlife]

me too. Question is, where are those communities ?

[@sofiakou5110]

Me, too 💕 let's create it!

[@Trikeria]

This topic is very thought provoking. Romantic relationships are not the only kind of relationship. Many times people feel a lack due to not prioritizing self and the power of mutual platonic relationships ie family, friends, business etc .

[@Chrome166]

I've been realizing literally in the last couple days that the reason I can't seem to ever fully commit to a romantic relationship (and why I hate dating) is because really I'm just looking for really close friends. I don't think I'm ever going to settle down with someone unless they just naturally happen to be my best friend first and adding a romantic element later seems worth it to us. In childhood my family moved around a lot and I lost all of my closest friendships, and I am and have been so lonely because of that. Trying to patch over that with a significant other just doesn't work for me because it's not what I'm missing.

[@caidviramontes]

Bro I feel the same way. I crave a brotherhood of male friends that I’m hanging out with all the time much more than a romantic relationship.

[@TheShavedleggs]

In childhood, your parents moved around a lot and you lost all your friendships. You are in general afraid of bonding, because you are afraid to loose this bond. It will be no diffrence, if your romantic relationship will start instantly or unfold during a longterm close friendship. Because the possibility of a break up can occur in both types of relations, in romantic ones and in those with friends. We agree on this? You are just afraid to go through emotional pain again. Play this through in your head, loss and the emotions following it. And then start a romantic relation ship with someone you ca come close with without getting uncomfortable. And remenber: All things are built to fall apart over time. Lifecycles. Live hurts. Love makes happy.

[@tamaraesther7765]

i have the exact same story

[@boodoo-doma]

I am looking for the exact same thing. I do not feel sexually or romantically attached to a person, until I find it to be a mentally close relationship

[@noemarie8]

literally my life word for word.... omg

[@srosecardella]

Wow! I had no idea I was running on this subconscious program that my romantic partner is the most important one. Yesterday I was daydreaming of my soulmate, writing lists and wishing it would all come true. Now, I feel a little silly because a part of me wishes my potential soulmate would finally be the one for everything! But, teal is right no one can ever be the one for everything. It really feels right to take a step back and look at who can be the people in my life for other needs and not just that one♥️

[@emilypaussa1124]

Thank you Teal! I need this reminder frequently as I can get so very consumed by a new relationship. Love is BLIND! But my eyes are opening.

[@zingerflippinz2066]

In my experience "romantic" love is a beginning to a much deeper and more meaningful bond that, if it is meant to be, grows on its own without interference from either partner's ego. My spouse came into my life when I was ready for a true relationship based on love and not desire. As time passes our love grows and reaches different depths and heights.

[@danikagraham2314]

I really like this. I do think that friendship is really under valued these days. I'd like to see that change

[@roses6564]

The romantic relationship includes friendship.

[@ghouling1111]

A friend told me after another friendship ended that we often project the needs we had from our parents onto partners and friends.. That we need them to be there for us.. Because we never had it. We never had someone there for us.. And it's our journey to learn to be that for ourselves.

[@amandakongsted1952]

Amen! Once I moved back to normal society after living with a polyamorous tribe for half a year and I was shocked by viewing this relationship hierarchy we got going with my new eyes. It scared me how people were completely comfortable in these frames and roles we made for ourselves, hanging out together but truly only having to prioritize and look out for one’s romantic partner. In the polyamorous community we were struggling a lot with considering everyone’s needs (whether they were romantically connected to us or not), and it was very uncomfortable and a lot of work. But it felt so true to have this human to human relationship where everyone was equally considered and cared for. And ever since then, I have felt a whole new sense of safety within myself in all of my relationships and I have not been obsessing over romantic partners ever again.

[@giselejr100]

That awesome! And you came back to the tribe?

[@TealSwanOfficial]

Incase You'd Rather Read About It Instead: tealswan.com/resources/articles/romantic-partner/

[@plantpoweredpagan]

Thank you Teal 💙💜

[@keerthanavelmurugan8371]

Just a few years ago my close friendships with my girl friends were my family relationships! And it literally felt equally amazing and painful like a romantic relationship! And i got to realise i really value close friendships as strong as a romantic relationships... I just needed to find compatible ones for me to be happy inside it! so now discovering compatible deep connections again! Even though parts of me are scared of this! Thank you for your wonderful insights teal ❤️ really appreciate it 😍❤️✨

[@lilihillis1449]

Putting myself 1st made me a valuable loving person, I now have a retired fireman in my life. A real heroic man that values my wisdom and we both learn from each other. We both have friends we didn't dump after meeting...gee maybe my ptsd is over...thanks to self care/Love.

[@pleun315]

❤️🙏

[@mazklassa9338]

Are you retired too?

[@lisaariottiart]

🙏🏻🤩

[@RickDistance]

Had your post-traumatic-stress-disorder something to do with germans?

[@noemarie8]

so happy for you :)

[@this-abledtheextravertedhe5299]

❤️🥰❤️ My relationship with myself, I’ve learned, is where all my relationships start. People come and go in our lives, but we are always there.

[@miaduana]

I have gaslit myself throughout my life because I experience all my close relationships intensely and intuitively feel the importance of the roles they all play. But my socialization and conditioning is counterintuitive and not conducive for that. I had told myself to just wait for "the One" in order to experience the satisfaction and intimacy I desperately want. This video is the delete code for that defective programing.

[@DeMafiaGirl]

Friendships are extremely difficult to make and maintain. No one has the time anymore. Everyone is constantly working. Trying to sort out a meeting time is like playing a game of chess with all these schedules. So you end up friendless as an adult and the only thing you can hope for is a romantic relationship, but you can't get that either cause you can't make friends in the first place for romance to even take place

[@JamesJohn-og8or]

The most important relationship is with yourself and I have never been of the belief that one person can provide you everything that you need. I don’t believe in one soulmate nonsense! I believe you can have more than one. I’ve had quite a few and they all provided me different things. Our ideas about relationships and romance are screwed up. That’s why the divorce rate is over 50%.! This was a superb video that speaks truth!!

[@evadebruijn]

I've never understood why there are so often correlations made between quality of relationship and longevity of it, what has one to do with the other?

[@tezeu960]

Sounds like you're having a great relationship with yourself 👍🏻

[@JamesJohn-og8or]

@@tezeu960 I learned a long time ago that the only one who can make me truly happy is me. No one knows me better than myself. No one can complete me because I’m already complete. I have had more than one soul mate and when I fall in love I invite someone to love me as I do and love them and to compliment my life by adding to it as I add to theirs. Ying Yang it must be. A giving and taking in various measures.

[@leahflower9924]

It's not girl of your dreams it's several girls of your dreams in your case lol

[@violetselene244]

@@evadebruijn I don’t see how they wouldn’t be correlated. I would think that if the quality of a relationship is good that both parties would be happy and thus want to stay in each other’s lives/paired. Just like if someone finds a job that they enjoy, they stay. Or If people enjoy their family members, they keep in touch for the rest of their lives.It’s about the quality of things and if they’ll meet a persons needs. Just like if you have a quality blanket that keeps you warm and comfortable, why would you throw that away if it meets your needs?

[@cynicalidealist11]

None of those other relationships you mentioned can meet your sexual needs. That is such an important part of the equation that was left unmentioned here.

[@ennyellie2793]

they can :) monogamy is a societal construct too! (watch polyamory video)

[@cynicalidealist11]

@@ennyellie2793 I have and I disagree with it.

[@CHK12319]

@@tanL22 what a shallow view of sex

[@theodora_pilates]

Yeah I have no idea how she managed to not mention it even once

[@colleenacupuncture]

The elephant in the room!

[@cosmicproductionsone7112]

Family is a great support system but its a problem when family isn't supportive....so we look for friends same situation esp in west friends are not quite supportive infact do create loads of problems....thats the reason we think that an intimate relation is important for the support we need as humans...

[@MsDreamofmine]

If we don’t make relating with ourselves a priority then every other relationships will suffer. Until we learn about loving ourselves then we will not understand any other relationships whether it’s romantic, platonic, friendships, and or family; no relationship will ever be healthy and balanced.

[@monilaninetynine3811]

Self love really is key

[@katedagreat8173]

So deep, amen!

[@leahflower9924]

Easier said than done seriously

[@MsDreamofmine]

@@leahflower9924 It really is easy 💜Trust me, before I learned how to love on me then I’d probably agree with you however now that I know that If you believe it to be true; that’s what becomes true for only you. Your perception is your reality.

[@thisisntallowed9560]

It'd be nice to have a video about what we should expect from romantic relationships, what is unique to those relationships and what isn't. Cause I would still assume a romantic relationship can bring things that no other relationship can.

[@cristinaangelene5587]

I find that “romantic” relationships scare the crap out of me. What I mean by that is it somehow seems too “whirlwindy” (if that’s a word) and I find myself not really wanting to be “swept away” in any way. Instead I prefer something much more stable and grounding. Not so chemically-driven. I guess you could call that more of a partner or a best friend. But when I meet a guy who gets too clingy I immediately put my feelers up and run. I don’t want to be a drug to them. Or a distraction.

[@carolbevis38]

I finally realized at 50 that I had a romantic love addiction and began the healing process. I have been alone now for many years and now do not want a romantic relationship. I have had so many world adventures and done so many things since.

[@JemDreamz]

I was just rereading a writing about not all relationships are romantic. Thank you for being so colorful.

[@chelseamarissa382]

I totally prioritize romantic relationships over the other relationships in my life. A person you're dating is more iclined to show up for you and be there for you than your friends. I value my other relationships but it does seem true that a romantic partner seems more like a guarantee your needs will be met, and that someone will show up and be there for you.

[@wadeverweire7810]

🌈☀️ LOVE THIS ! YOU NAILED IT! FACT ⭐

[@plumquake6838]

If this is really true than I find this very sad. Even though I have I husband who I know will always be there for me I also have a few very close friends I equally appreciate and I know will also be there for me no matter what. Its the same level of trust and security as with my husband and I am very grateful for that because my husband cannot meet all my needs - thats simply not his job.

[@wadeverweire7810]

@@plumquake6838 if your husband can't meet at least 99% of your needs then it sounds like you're with the wrong person. There's probably someone else that you would have far more in common with and meet all your needs in every way. However it doesn't replace really awesome friends, everyone needs friends and it's nice to have at least one friend you know you can count on if the chips are down.

[@plumquake6838]

@@wadeverweire7810 one of my basic needs as a social human being is to connect with more than one person - how should anyone accomplish that as a spouse? I do things with other people like team sports and I am in an amateur drama group. I count all that as my needs to go out and connect with people and self-fulfillment. I don’t need my partner to participate in these activities if he doesn’t want to do them. That doesn’t mean that he can’t meet my need for emotional connection, for feeling safe and comfortable and totally myself with him, for being a team as parents, as a family as well as sexual needs etc. I think you are mistaking two things here: it is not about missing something in the relationship with my husband. It is about adding more value to my life through other people.

[@wadeverweire7810]

@@plumquake6838 well said and this does clarify how you feel much more. I totally agree with the fact that we all need a social life. Some people need more of it than others because we are all different. I'm very social myself and enjoy time with friends doing different activities as well. I enjoy visiting with friends and hanging out and having a good time. If my spouse wanted to participate in any of these activities or hang out with these friends with me, I absolutely wouldn't have a problem. I would be happy and encourage it however if my spouse didn't want to that's fine as well I still need to do things in life I enjoy and have friends as well. I think we all should have this right to do so. All couples will have good days and bad days and different boundaries Within each marriage and so on. Sometimes there's a fine line though with some friendships that can make problems within a marriage. For example, if you have a friend of the opposite sex that's fine but it can get tricky and hurtful if your husband can't meet all your needs so you need to spend the entire day with another guy. And have to tell your husband that he can't meet all your needs so this other guy will today. I'm going with him to have lunch then do some shopping together and plan on going to an amusement park and ride roller coasters for the day with him and if we're not too tired will catch a movie and maybe eat dinner at night. Some marriages could be fine with this and some aren't because everyone is different. Everyone has different boundaries and preferences I suppose. I encourage friendships and having fun with people doing different activities but I think the dynamic can change when it's just one friend you're spending time with. Things come into play I suppose such as how much time you're spending with one particular friend of the opposite sex. What activities you do together and so on. Bit of a gray area for each marriage to figure out I suppose. Some marriages are fine with it and some aren't. I guess lines have to be drawn somewhere and it's up to people to figure out where those boundaries feel comfortable. I guess imagine the opposite happening. If your husband straight up said to you that you can't meet all my needs so I need to spend time with Susan We'll be gone all day doing all these things shopping , amusement park a movie and dinner. And then he says that he needs to do this with Susan four or five times a week. Somewhere there needs to be a boundary or someone eventually gets hurt. But that's for each marriage to customize and find out the right fit for them I suppose. LOL, this conversation is a good example. I think it's healthy and nice that we can chat and share opinions. Being able to have conversation and be acquainted with people outside of marriage. This is a healthy thing for sure! I suppose this would be an unhealthy act if either felt they needed to keep conversations secretive and not let spouses know. People need friends and a life of activities if they choose. As long as everyone is honest about everything and there's no secrets and so on. I think boundaries, healthy boundaries are a custom fit for each marriage.

[@diamondunicorn2421]

My best relationship is with myself, my daughter and my divine partner. All in that order. Because if I can’t have a relationship with myself. No one else can have it with me.

[@sugarkittymystic]

aw this is so lovely

[@roses6564]

Divine partner?...

[@diamondunicorn2421]

@@roses6564 I title him that. Because i know for a fact the universe sent him to me. God whichever source is personal to you.

[@Almadelobo9]

I was born into a Mexican/American family and the push for the marriage archetype is annoying. When I was younger they always asked about my love life. I got married and divorced, and now the leave me alone. I have zero intentions of getting married because marriage is overrated. It here is where I agree with the gist of this presentation: fallowing one's curiosity an bliss is much more satisfying than seeking for a partner. Doing what we one loves leaves you satisfied about why you took this plunge in this planet,. Trying to make a relationship workout leaves you wondering why we human's are so fucked up. Singleness is a good option. You can work on your shadow, meditate, spend time with friends and family, and overall work on being your highest expression while you are here. In fact being alone precipitates growing up. So for any one who is alone, see it as blessing and make this incarnation worth while. Find your spiritual path (aka, vocation) and serve others with gusto. Bless you all.

[@Almadelobo9]

@ᴛᴇᴀʟ sᴡᴀɴ▫️ is he a match maker!

[@sunnygirl9691]

RC I agree with you! Being single is a very empowered position- so much can be accomplished without so much compromise and sacrifice.

[@roses6564]

True - until you find someone who turns your life upside down, then all those theories are out the window.

[@Almadelobo9]

@@roses6564Darling, I am almost 57 years old and jaded. What are the odds I find someone who will turn my life upside down? Most women are interested in the life money can buy. I have little of it so they don’t stay around long enough for them to affect me in that manner.

[@roses6564]

@@Almadelobo9 I agree with you - most women are so because they are normative materialist meatsacks, just like most men. I know it is difficult to believe but there are women out there who are interested in more than just maximum money for maximum lifestyle. If you have some basic means to make a decent living (not a bum) and if you have something of substance inside of you to offer - the ability to bond - then there are authentic women out there who would appreciate you for exactly what you are. Are they in the minority? Absolutely. Are your odds low? Yes. I wish you good luck in coming across one of those.

[@CrownedFoxProductions]

being on the aromantic spectrum, i so appreciate this video!

[@TheGreyx3]

This is so needed and an eye-opener, a nice reminder :) Thank you Teal, you look incredibly beautiful, as always

[@aprilhelmer9613]

Thank you Thank you Thank you Teal Swan! 38 unmarried and I needed to be reminded of this

[@7arafa]

I love it when you say "i wanna thank you for the bravery you have to step into awareness"💕

[@hadnotja]

Thank you Teal!!! The importance of your message cannot be overstated. Western culture is obsessed with the idea of romantic love to the point where it is seen as the only path to fulfillment.

[@roses6564]

Then you do you, if romantic binding is not your thing, but don't devalue this sacred experience for others by saying they are "obsessed." There;s a reason for that since it is the most intense experience a human can have.

[@kalpanarawat4475]

She gave me clarity like no one else

[@sawilliams]

I think one of the most important relationships to have is with yourself

[@xfaroutzx3637]

I believe that there is a level of intimacy and physical closeness that you experience with a romantic partner that you will never have with anyone else. That's why most people seek a loyal partner. We want that one person who we share physical, emotional and mental intimacy with that only shares that with us. No other relationship will ever offer that. I think the explanations in this video used the history of why marriage became a tradition to make a point but it doesn't change these facts.

[@donashia6091]

I agree ☝️

[@gunnasintern]

nice video as always. personally, i’ve always been more interested and prioritized friends and family, instead of being overly obsessed with romantic relationships that’s all to common in today’s worldwide culture. having people in your life who accept and enjoy who you are and like your company are more important to me. also my relationship with myself is the most important too, self love always comes first as life starts from within

[@tuesdaykuglin8271]

I think I really needed to hear this, thank you Teal. Since I’ve never had a romantic relationship it has seemed like I’ve been missing out on a lot of things. Now I think I’m going to set an intention to build great friendships, and if a romantic relationship happens after that, then great. But I don’t want that to be my priority. I realized that I need to figure out what my needs and wants are first.

[@daisy7141]

My husband use to say to me, "You are dumb and I can prove it! Look who you married. ME! I thought he was joking until I realized he wasn't. I won't go into the reasons why he was right, but I wasted years of my life not realizing it.

[@kelliemalcolmsensualgoddess]

Yep this is me. I have several men in my life and all of them meet different needs. I also have girl friends but I am talking more about sexual or intimate male partners of all ages. And so far it is working. We have no restrictions on each other and we are free to follow our joy with whoever we please. One man in particular is the one who knows I want him to cuddle with at the end of the day and that makes him happy. He feels at home.

[@MorganHorse]

Really grateful for this. I’m trying to learn that I don’t need a relationship again.

[@janlaag]

Romantic partnership is the center of the social structure of so many cultures because (besides the reproductive and historical reasons) it is the one relationship where symmetrical exchanges can be built more easily, that is way more complicated into other kinds of relationships.

[@beletristabennett6910]

I think this is possible the BEST video that Teal has ever posted and i have also pointed other videos that were off mark. But nope this is truly great thinking. I have old friendships that btw still to this date my family does not even understand "why is that person not your significant other!?" or how come you even have such a long friendship to start with? Awfull people and comments...like having authentic solid old friendships is bad! 😅 Shame of you (them) to place one relationship as a Holly grail in life or as the main goal or end goal.....We need authentic balanced relationships people, wake up! Good call Teal! 😊

[@nobody-n9s]

I love you Teal and I’m grateful for you ♥️

[@tpriestess]

There are so many ways to relate! And we have such diverse needs. It is wonderful to get real about all of this!!!

[@jockbw]

About 2 years ago my already nonstandard perspective shifted and expanded drastically after walking into my bedroom and going welcomed by my reflection in the still to be hung mirror still from a recent move. Though my reflection, it was another person looking back at me. I have not had the sense that I have a soulmate or that I need another person to complete me, so I was fought by surprise when in that moment I realised the person in the mirror is the one I will spend the rest of my life getting to know. Given that I you need a perspective to see these things, the way this is playing out is that I am discovering the various facets of myself reflected by those around me. Adam Westbrook has a video essay “what was Love like before people had to find a soulmate” and it ends pondering what the stories would look like that would form the basis of love 6.0

[@DCrane925]

I've been single a longgg time and I think I'm ok with that as long as I'm happy

[@joncolunga673]

10:36 BOOM. Like that. I'm not sure why that's the cutest thing I've ever seen anyone do. Don't ever change Teal

[@jerrytyfting2952]

From the video perspective love is not the prioritization, needs are. Needs that can be met by more people than just romantic relations. Friends who can meet needs become the more important priority in this case.

[@martinmosna2732]

I like the point about living in a society which prioritises romantic relationships. It’s the same as eating healthy in a society which prioritises junk food. It’s not made easy for us.

[@FreeSpirit47]

The most important relationship i have is my relationship with myself. Choosing to become single & celibate in 2012 is the best decision I have made. I won't have sexual relations with anyone I'm not married to & am content to remain unmarried for the rest of my life. For me, having sexual relations with a man gave him too much power over me. Males will use this to their own benefit no matter how much it hurts everyone else except them, of course. I was 50% of the equation so I removed myself from it. Life began to improve, for me, immediately, it has only become better since then.

[@fireandfleshmusic]

Seems like those males dodged a bullet.

[@FreeSpirit47]

@@fireandfleshmusic Back to the basement, incel.

[@love_dove_]

So true. We are in a relationship with many others all the time. My teacher says our first most important relationship is the one we have with ourselves. Second, with the universe/spirit/God etc. And third, with love partnerships. Most people have it around the other way.

[@GypsyEyes]

damn right after my breakup. teal does it again

[@lovespacemeditationandtarot11]

This is something I have been considering for a long time. Why is one kind of relationship valued so much more than another? As usual, your unique perspective is so practical!!

[@emyoffiong6550]

You are really amazing Teal, the kind of genuinely authentic person I would love to grow into. Kudos for your good works

[@mydivinename]

This is where my consciousness has been tapping into as well recently!! 🔥🔥🔥

[@lbeschrich]

Teal swan is the most amazing spiritual teacher I've ever seen! Wow Thank you soooo much Teal! I hope to meet you one day 🙌🏼🌹💖

[@mmmmmili4534]

Yeees she is the best 💖

[@bexybubbles5580]

That makes a lot of sense how people are prioritizing the romantic relationship. My best friend in high school stopped hanging out with me when she got her first boyfriend. I always wondered why she didn't want to hang amymore & seemed obsessed with him. I think her clingyness ended up driving him away. All I know is she is almost 40 now & still single.

[@daisy7141]

If you have to force love and it's a chore, you probably aren't with the right person. I know there's give and take, but sometimes unconditional love goes too far.

[@lilyevangelus6392]

That’s so true. The need for relationship is shifting in our generation. That’s why our parents don’t understand why we look for a blissful relationship rather than financial stability and security. To their generation marriage is about children, joint assets and inheritance. It’s still is though. The marital law doesn’t change. Marriage is dry and cold, but how my parents and grandparents made it work? Because they hold their duty to God first and their families and the communities second, they probably put themselves last. Something that the Spiritual movement doesn’t encourage. So to my understanding the more “Spiritual” we are, the harder we are to be compatible with the type of relationships our parents had, which is Marriage.

[@Nyuffykah]

Their cold marriages was the reason we had a cold family life. Without family support we rely first on friends, then romantic partners. We put too much pressure on them, because we are starved of love.

[@lilyevangelus6392]

@@Nyuffykah I admit I’m not someone who’s easy to be with. At my younger years Yes I kept searching for something to feel that void, but now I take whatever support I can get. But yes, the standard is still high, because I know what it takes to hold a marriage together, for a lifetime.

[@Nyuffykah]

@@lilyevangelus6392 well I wish you good luck! We are in the same shoes.

[@lilyevangelus6392]

@@Nyuffykah all the best to u too, we can’t rely on anyone too much too, as the needs are on high levels, best to be independent and appreciate and cherish whoever comes into our lives. But I don’t think the goal here is to find someone who can fill that void, but to BE someone who can fill that void for someone else. When we lack, we give to receive.

[@sugarkittymystic]

very thought provoking comment Lilly, i think you're right indeed

[@tijanacresenzi6035]

This hit me hard, and it has a lot of truth. Thank you Teal!

[@santostracey93]

Yep, I somehow believe having a girlfriend would automatically magically fix me. Of course, that’s not how healing works, nor love. *I wish I could’ve learned that sooner.*

[@roses6564]

This is like saying "intelligence is not all that matters." Well, sure. Many people love to say that. They are right but they forget it matters A LOT. Same with the romantic relationship. No other bond is as complex and fulfilling, even if many other kinds of relationships contribute to our well-being.

[@mutzicat]

So many interesting viewpoints, expanding our relationships makes sense. Its true that we put too much emphasis on that one romantic partner.

[@petramartinovic9866]

The most relationship is with yourself that is the biggest problem..✌✌❤

[@pleun315]

You are the first here who understand what love is all about ❤️💋🙏

[@rudeegruenberg9184]

that makes no sense

[@terribishop5313]

Hollywood glamorized it for 75 years

[@anitavarga9123]

This funny, bc for most of my life i valued friendships more then any other relationships, and really disliked when ppl would just disappear into their romantic relationships and not keep in contact anymore etc. But then later in life i had a series of heartbreaks with friends etc so i started valuing romantic partner more etc. Its really about some balance tho that i havent sorted yet...all relationships are important in life...

[@Brandace_Lynn]

a romantic relationship was my only chance to have a real family. everyone else is married has their own families and no time for friends, sisters , daughters etc ... So it's hard not to correlate the two. I was denied even that.

[@julyy7788]

I feel ya 😔

[@englishcoach7772]

That sense of lack seems to be intense. Inward and potentially long term. The world can only be seen through your eyes. My eyes cannot see what you see. But not too long ago I felt that very feeling.

[@jenifernadeau]

I've learned that Real Families get created after we learn to love ourselves... Soul tribe members will show up and can be stronger than any family we chose (in past lives) to be born into.. to teach us our soul lessons... when I realized I deliberately chose to be born into my family in this particular existence, It's empowering, as I can now see parents for who they are... Not a skewed perception of what we're subconsciously programmed to believe, in order to keep us stuck or in patterns ... I've created families wherever I go, workplaces, communities, and connected with strangers so fast, it's like we've known each other since birth. We don't need romance or marriage to have babies, and " taking a village " attitude to raise children is what the world appears to be shifting back into... .people learning to ask for help, etc Exciting times.. Adopting, fostering, actively choosing a sperm donor, etc appear romantic, no? It's self love, as we can't offer unconditional love without offering it to ourselves, 😍

[@dallymoo7816]

Exactly. I am fine being alone right now with my daughter and family.

[@angelaangela7856]

You have helped me to understand my partner so much more.

[@saraepsilon]

easy for you to say, Teal! You've created your own intentional community to pool resources from. The rest of us are out here in increasingly fragmented communities :(

[@renaeturner2591]

Hello to you. As of Yesterday I have been introduced to your guidance and suggestions. I have to say I'm very impressed. I tried one of your meditation techniques and ended up in tears. After owning my emotions I further Dive deeper into some underlying underlining issues that I was unaware of. At any rate thank you for your guidance and keep up the good work.

[@cleodiamond7569]

You blew my mind away with this one

[@casil_the_goat_lord]

Thank you for this!

[@hannadeckert6491]

You just broke my brain in the best way😩🥰 thank you so much for your interesting views on things, so expansive and logical yet intuitive🙏

[@randomelvis3359]

We seek love….. however love is “within”…once found we need/want little else, and the beauty is we get to “RADIATE” our love 💕 Which will attract alike…. Be your best version for YOU first 🙏🏻

[@TenableVegan]

My parents met when they both had nothing & they built a life together & became the best versions of themselves by supporting each other through thick & thin. They are better as a team than individually. 50 years later they are still doing it.

[@queengoblin]

This is not what Teal teaches, she teaches that we need other people.

[@randomelvis3359]

@@TenableVegan This is codependency, but can really work for some folk… not for the one that is awakening to truth, but for sure it’s a life of sorts…. It becomes a problem when one or the other passes… for me personally, I’ve learned love first within…then if a partner passes i can celebrate them rather than grieving 🙏🏻

[@randomelvis3359]

@Pr1v0 Stick with Teal…. She will show you the way 🙏🏻… enjoy 😉

[@randomelvis3359]

@@queengoblin Teal teaches how we act and react together, how the truth of love is found is through dynamics and we do need others on this journey… but love IS within…. Dynamics will show this… relationships are the vehicle to conscious awareness 🙏🏻

[@gypsysundrop]

I am at awe with your words of wisdom 🙏🏼 thank you!!

[@Chimalmita1]

It was so clever to show a scene from the film "Notebook" on the thumbnail. Damn, it's a great love stoey, but it can really mess up in people's heads

[@pameladelgado5938]

I love you Teal Thank you

[@janetfondacci3070]

I love you Teal! Seriously, your wisdom has improved the quality of my life. I'm infinitely grateful 🙏 Thank you for all that you share.

[@lewissherlock6777]

Incredible. Thank you, Teal.

[@Dequa21]

Realistically speaking. I know I've been behaving this way for YEARS. Unintentionally setting pressure on the other person of interest. How is it pressure if they feel the same way about you? If something is truly symbiotic. Nothing else doesn't matter to that extent. However, of course there are going to be other priorities that coinside with each other. Like family, friends and other loved ones. These horse blinders that we maybe wearing is exactly what the spirits wants us to focus on. Whether if it is true love or a life lesson. Which In that case keep in mind. I do not believe in coincidences for the sole fact that things just don't happen.

[@somegirl2537]

Wow. This video was right on time. Thank you.

[@velvetzica]

I understand why Teal feels like that and i usually agree with her perspectives. I used to prioritise other relationships as well as the romantic one (like the relationship with parents, siblings, friends); but in our modern society it doesn’t work. Unfortunately i have found myself in the situation of being the only one of my circle that was not ABSOLUTELY prioritising the romance over anything else, and this has only affected the relationship with my respective partner. But also the relationship with my friends because they will simply discard me whenever something regarding their partner/husband/wife came up and they expected me to understand because as they say “that’s what we all do”. What about that? 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️So i become the a**hole when i failed to show up at important moments and treat people the same way. In my opinion, the fact that Teal lives within an intentional community makes this model she is describing possible and desirable. You have plenty of people whom you share everything, so problems are common but also resources, be it financial or intellectual, emotional, of time management etc are shared. Probably even raising kids it’s a common responsibility and the entire community helps. What i want to say, it is a different model of living, probably a healthier one, a more connected one, but the majority of us who live in the modern world, especially in big cities, are not there yet. Yes, parents and siblings, friends and coworkers are important, but at the end of the day you are in your own house with your husband/wife/partner. That’s why you shouldn’t discard this relationships, but if you put other relationships to the top or even on an equal level, it doesn’t work. I understood that even i’m bothered by this when my husband tried to prioritise some part of his family at the expense of our couple and we were close to breaking up on that occasion. I don’t know, maybe it works for others, but i’ve tried it long before and it doesn’t work for me. Not right now, not in the context we are living.

[@aniokay]

Hey Teal. Hope you are taking care of yourself. Trauma therapy has helped me with my ptsd. Lots of love from Europe.

[@alimay967]

LOVE LOVE LOVE ALL TEAL'S VIDEOS. YOU ARE AMAZING! ❤❤

[@Klowcn]

Was never interested in friends I'm all about the hot and fuzzy feelings. Someone that wants to experience me no matter how ridiculous I am.

[@daniellerodgers6493]

Yep same here.

[@Klowcn]

However I feel so bad I just want someone to kill me, but at the same time I enjoy the lows as much as the highs

[@VSFutureModel]

this is EXACTLY the message i needed to hear 💗

[@francoisehelenepoetry5462]

aahhh great video! It's so important to talk about this! I agree with what you're saying, thank you so much for sharing.

[@heynow2302]

The Title says it. Sometimes you gotta let it all go / be so you can come back clean from conditioning factors 😎👍

[@Lichfeldian--Suttonian]

Thank you, Teal. I have long thought that the Culture that I was born into offers some protection to its inhabitants, especially the women. We then ‘fixate’ our culture’s view on romantic relationships. As your article _The Value Realisation_ suggests, since I feel that I am not overly compatible with the practices of my culture and that I am authentic, finding the right ‘pair bonding’ for me would prove difficult, in spite of the fact that I have much to offer. I am not interested in anyone who only loves what I bring to the table. In the meantime, I have many friends and family that offer my needs to a point. Though it would be nice, I am not in any hurry to find a partner, especially within the cultural sphere.

[@Cybergirl]

I value them all and I definitelly love to be in love! ♥

[@claystahl7002]

You can love more than one person I have it was good and it made me happy why not have the best of both worlds

[@NG480]

The word "Amatonormativity" fits this topic well.

[@gracefulbarbie]

seeing this on my front page… is definitely a sign from God. i needed this!

[@sugarkittymystic]

this is such good advice, however the chemicals in my body are like LOVEEEE RELATIONSHIP NOWWWWWWW

[@p0rtkey]

Thank you for this video! Needed this.

[@BarbaraMerryGeng]

Perfect Timing ! ✨ I was really ready to hear this. 🐇

[@sugarkittymystic]

i love your name miss merry berry haha :)

[@Qabim]

Thank you for this. I needed this