Absolution (2015) - Steven Seagal - Comedic Movie Review

[@papapetebreen]

Can't get enough of these Seagal reviews

[@RedEyeReviews]

Thank you so much!

[@brothathyne5017]

The Neil Breen pic is amazing 😂 and agreed, Steven Seagal is so entertaining.

[@papapetebreen]

@@brothathyne5017 Lol glad somebody noticed the Breen reference

[@RM-306]

Me too. Good work.

[@munstrumridcully]

I'm really enjoying seeing your style changing and your confidence grow from the first video to now:-) You start off so quiet and reserved in the early reviews, and now you put so much energy into your delivery, snd really draw us in as viewers. Well done!

[@RedEyeReviews]

Aww thank you so much! I've learned alot through this channel. It's been a great way to work on my editing and writing. But also just connecting with movie lovers makes it worth it.

[@docsnake]

I actually like both ways, both informative and well done.

[@WanArk86]

Aside from "The Superstar" there's one more person that I always saw in his movies... The dude that was an evil doctor in 'Against The Dark'. I always see him in every Steven Seagal film project

[@RedEyeReviews]

Oh yeah, great spot! I have also seen him in at least 3 or 4 of his movies.

[@CalaVdarivdavd]

He's a romanian theatre actor. Claudiu Bleonț. I watch Seagal reviews and I am amazed of how many movies he did in my country.

[@WanArk86]

@@CalaVdarivdavd I definitely gonna check his imdb later.

[@soorej91]

the guy who seagal mocks for being fat ( the guys whom seagal talks to where he goes like back when you were young dumb and full of c*m with a head full of hair and 50 pounds lighter) is also there in a few flicks

[@scevvin7788]

The consistent uses of It's Always Sunny earned a sub for sure. Well done.

[@RedEyeReviews]

Haha thank you!

[@BatCaveOz]

I am binging this wonderful Seagal content. Thanks Redeye! Also - circa 14:10 I don't think Seagal was ordering cigars, I'm pretty sure he mumbled his order for "Some scotch, Johnny Walker"

[@RedEyeReviews]

Glad you are liking it! And that makes way more sense lol

[@McBlah1976]

This is what happened between the end of original CSI and the beginning of the new episodes for Nick Stokes and you cannot convince me otherwise

[@robertparks7233]

He actually did 4 seasons of Mcgver,which wasn't very good,except for the babes

[@spiritualanarchist8162]

this is getting a addiction ! I don't get any work done, because i keep watching these Seagal comedies 😅

[@RedEyeReviews]

That is so great! I'm so glad you are enjoying the videos :)

[@spiritualanarchist8162]

@@RedEyeReviews Thanks mate. I'm quit my job and am now searching for a European based Seagal fanclub to spend the rest of my life ..All because of you ;)

[@austindurham5736]

Fucking for real, me too lol

[@Shaki123]

This "Asian Superstar" is actually a great actor. He plays a very significant role in the highly acclaimed series "The Expanse", which is maybe the best show in recent memory. I'm sure he did this for the money.

[@RedEyeReviews]

Ooooo OK gotchya. Yeah he is always my favorite part of the movie he is in. I knew he was talented just never saw him outside of Seagal movies

[@EAScotti]

And he's Ryu from the street fighter movie

[@Shaki123]

@@RedEyeReviews thanks for the video by the way 🔥 keep it up, you're doing great!

[@RedEyeReviews]

@@Shaki123 thank you so much!

[@michaelmyers3709]

Thought he was called Bryon until I looked close at his name and it’s actually Byron.

[@cargo_vroom9729]

14:10 "Did you just order SOME cigars, Like, like plural. How long are you planning on being here?" No, he said "Give me uhh some scotch, Johnny Walker."

[@andyeverett93]

Why does everything about this movie seem so familiar?😂 Bro, I seriously cannot get enough of your channel. The last few days I’ve been binge watching.

[@bigbob10118]

It’s crazy that Seagal was actually the best part of Gutshot straight. Absolution actually wasn’t that bad for a Seagal movie. The Asian guy was great in it and Vinnie Jones is always fun to watch when he pops up in these movies

[@RedEyeReviews]

Completely agree! He actually did really good in Gutshot. I genuinely liked it.

[@Dashdak.]

Love how the bad guys fingers jiggle when Segal breaks his arm at 12:18

[@richcastle]

thanks for that, didnt notice the 1st time hahahahaha

[@kitbradley2689]

The guy that Chi beats at the end is Josh Barnett. *sighs* The legendary mixed martial artist, submission grappling machine, and for-realsies tough guy Josh Barnett. I don't even have any funny Barnett-Seagal stories, either. I know Josh was just pickin' up a paycheck and good for him but it's hard to see him in this movie. Curse you, Redeye! *shakes fist*

[@sreekrishnanmuralitharan520]

Clicked as fast as this popped up. Thanks as usual redeye 👍

[@RedEyeReviews]

So glad you liked it! Thank you!

[@TheKosmikid]

“I work for the Boss.” “Bruce Springsteen?” Would have been the perfect response.

[@alexgrenlie862]

I have to be at work in half an hour and I've been watching these videos for 3 hours now. Also Steven Seagal's hair plugs are looking Super Fresh at 1:44

[@RedEyeReviews]

I'm so glad I can provide you the entertainment :)

[@johnnycombs6570]

I just discovered your channel this morning... I love it!!! I'm on my 8th video in a row... Big Up from the UK ✌️

[@RedEyeReviews]

Aww thank you so much!

[@mike1967sam]

Did you hear about the time Seagal cried hysterically while held by an FBI agent because he got mixed up with the Gambino crime family and they were extorting money from him and sent a couple of guys to threaten him, it's a true story ... Sammy the Bull Gravano tells it on his show and laughs his ass off.

[@tellytime1427]

story link: kzbin.info/www/bejne/pKaWiZiNq750qq8

[@andreiaromanesei9270]

Man,of someone feels down,they should watch your Steven Seagal reviews. You and other guys who review the fattie's new films are better than most comedic actors. YOU ARE GOLD DUDE.GOLD

[@RedEyeReviews]

Aww thank you! I just want people to be happy and laugh. Life's too short to not poke the meatball wearing a bulletproof vest and yellow tinted glasses

[@OrinNekomata]

5:31 and 10:35 - I knew you'll manage to say it correctly at some point. Good job!

[@djcease1996]

Another great review. *Absolution* is the sequel/prequel to 2013's *Force Of Execution" & 2014's *A Good Man*. He plays Alexander again.

[@RedEyeReviews]

Thank you! Oooo that makes sense why it seems like a sequel. Good to know. Thank you for the added info :)

[@theradiobox5965]

@@RedEyeReviews I read up on that, apparently none of them are actually related and the only "connection" is the fact that Seagal plays a guy named John in each one. Not even the same last name. Just John. afudusghshsdjgshgjlsj i hate himmmmm

[@RedEyeReviews]

@@theradiobox5965 hahaha. Hey John's an easy name to remember

[@theradiobox5965]

@@RedEyeReviews Petitioning to rename every Seagal character "John" rn

[@RedEyeReviews]

@@theradiobox5965 make it so!

[@mattashton4521]

I like to imagine Segal painted that picture himself.

[@talesfromthehoodtv503]

Jesus Christ the amount of straight to DVD movies steven made is astronomical,i love it lol

[@Robytsu]

You will get those 100k subs that you deserve. Keep up the good stuff!! And don't forget to review Jiu Jitsu with Nicholas Cage!! It must be one of the greatest worst movies ever!

[@RedEyeReviews]

Thank you friend! We are on our way :) Of course. I'll bump it up the list. :)

[@parisgreen4600]

Good morning RedEye! There's something weird about the scene at :40 where George Eads is talking with the two bald dudes - it looks like it's CGI'ed (really badly, like a cheap video game) but why? I kinda dig Seagal's black and white Hawaiian shirt at 1:20 - it's a change from tactical gear. The Asian guy is cool - he reminds me of Tom Cruise 30 years ago, with a little Josh Hartnett. 13:00 maybe it's part of a stripper pole?

[@RedEyeReviews]

Good morning! I think that fight gym looks weird because of the lighting and "steady" camera. I don't know if you watch football but after touchdowns they do a similar thing with the camera and it feels JUST like a video game but I know it's not. It messes with my mind. Right!? He can pull of that look Oh he definitely has some Tom Cruise swagger to him. Maaaybe...like a mobile stripper pole? And the stripper takes it home with them from work? Lol. At first I thought it was an outside umbrella stand but that made me even more confused

[@jasonblakes]

Love your reviews pal Hilarious 😂

[@RedEyeReviews]

Thank you so much!

[@Cwibacca]

"Let me turn my speakers up, I can hardly hear this guy." 😆 🤣

[@CaptainCanuck1975]

12:00 Everyone knows martial arts. There's a really cheesy low-budget '80s action movie that does the same thing: everywhere the heroes go the guys they're fighting know martial arts, so there are karate cowboys, karate construction workers, etc. Wish I could remember the name of the movie, because it was pretty amusing.

[@nauseous3925]

7:39 I was laughing so hard at this 🤣

[@awesomedork8294]

When Seagal does his "patented arm break" watch the guys fingers! Hilarious, the rubber hand is awesome!

[@ammagnolia]

Did you seriously just ask for RVD is????????????????? Every wrestling fan and pothot just shook their heads in disappointment

[@challism]

This marks the first time I heard you say "escapes" correctly! Yay! You figured it out... no X!

[@RedEyeReviews]

Haha it's hard!

[@challism]

@@RedEyeReviews Some might say it's ineXcapable!

[@RedEyeReviews]

@@challism I would totally say it that way too

[@devinrice1865]

What happened to steven seagal donut hair on the face on gutshot straight?

[@RedEyeReviews]

Dude his movie covers are amazing. If you look at Sniper (the next movie) his head is Massive lol

[@devinrice1865]

@@RedEyeReviews yeah but all Steven Seagal does nothing expected walking to pick up something on the ground and shots some people in the beginning and end and is it on Sniper Ops. All Steven Seagal does is sit on his fat ass and waits for Rob vam dam and some other guy to come get Steven Seagal and some injury guy on Sniper Ops.

[@RedEyeReviews]

@@devinrice1865 OH no lol. I haven't seen Sniper Ops yet haha. So what your saying is he barely moves..... got it haha

[@devinrice1865]

@@RedEyeReviews you just going to watch the movie to find out lol

[@RedEyeReviews]

@@devinrice1865 exactly. Wish me luck

[@YakAttack915]

@4:43 Quick! Administer a shot! Had me rolling

[@RedEyeReviews]

Lol. Hey at least he listened

[@tomgraham8031]

Seagal reviews love it.

[@RedEyeReviews]

Thank you Tom!

[@michaelmyers3709]

Have actually seen Gutshot and don’t remember a single thing about it except the guy in the hat and Seagal dropping in for a moment. Absolution is usually called Mercenary Absolution which doesn’t make much sense. Didn’t mind the last couple of fights in spite of the onslaught of doubles. Do all the number plates in Europe look like blue stickers printed out from Photoshop?

[@RedEyeReviews]

Mercenary? Maybe he was trying to make a series and failed before it started lol. I honestly start to forget the doubles. They are everywhere and sometimes I don't even notice because it's so common place. Lol I'm curious if European license plates are like 555 numbers in American movies.

[@michaelmyers3709]

Maybe. I do remember a shot in Goodfellas where you can see a fake license plate blow off in the wind!

[@TCFan30]

Maybe he was intending to ripoff Hitman: Absolution title because it sounded trendy

[@keeranimal8]

At 14:13…did he say “some cigars” or “some scotch?” (I’m guessing cause he says Johnny Walker right after…)

[@Richualistik]

@ 14:13 he's says, "Give me some scotch. Johnnie Walker". No cigars.😁

[@applied.precision]

He totally bangs. Love it.

[@skullyskaric7779]

the boss? from metal gear solid? or saints row? (which is mike -_ - hate that name tho)

[@hectorayala7709]

What's up with that Bizzaro World pointed hairline? Weird! "Redeye Reviews" is King.

[@andevil777]

When you run out of movies, and your feeling extra masochistic, can u mbe listen to/review Segal's legendary music? I mean the way he holds a guitar alone is worth an episode.😂🤣😭🙃

[@roberthayes7737]

And with this one, I've finally watched all the reviews for the Seagal movies I've seen. (Will eventually pick back up with Asian Connection). On a side note, that painting of Seagal is identical to the photo used on the cover of his 'Mojo Priest' album.

[@keeranimal8]

“We work for the Boss!!” Holy shit Bruce Springsteen! They found you out!! Run!!

[@umayanan]

how the hell did you manage to say escape, been waiting to hear ecscape

[@RedEyeReviews]

Hahaha. Sometimes... we get it right

[@AztecUnshaven]

Lol, the "big dude in a tie" and the "short investment lawyer" are both legit world class martial artists in real life. The big dude in tie is the baby faced assassin "Josh Barnett", former UFC heavyweight champion, and the short lawyer is stuntman Ron Balicki (bladed weapon expert and student of Dan Inosanto).

[@RedEyeReviews]

Oh damn. Thank you for the added details. I seriously had no idea, but I appreciate the bonus info.

[@AztecUnshaven]

@@RedEyeReviews No problem man! Keep up the hilarious videos!

[@claytonbearden7793]

I know I have commented way too much, but Seagal movies are the gifts that keep on giving. I noticed Seagal is doing the old out of shape guy, but still tries to be relevant Flex by wearing tennis shoes with his suit. I see the old football players doing it on ESPN. Sorry I should probably wait to comment after I finish the video, but hey I can pretend it's fully interactive this way👍..that was really sad. Also when he breaks "The investment bankers" arm you can see how fake the arm they use is the rubber finers dangle very unnaturally lol classic shit right here. I applaud the investment and dedication my good sir.. keep it up!!

[@claytonbearden7793]

Also you mention Seagal's terrible handling of weapons, fun fact on his Cop Reality Show there is an episode where they talk about how he is the best marksman on the entire force and even is "helping" one of the other officers with practicing for an upcoming yearly review evaluation where they I assume requalify and it's absolutely hilarious. He is telling the guy to use his Chi and push the bullet through the center of the target, not going to lie I was addicted to that train wreck.

[@RedEyeReviews]

Haha hey I love the interactive commenting. Its like I can see your train of thought as it processes. Lol oh that fake arm looks like Harry Potters when they cast that spell to remove his bones lol.

[@RedEyeReviews]

I cant WAIT to watch that show. We will be doing it episode by episode and I am beyond excited from everything I have been told about it

[@JackieMartin1974]

These are fun! Man, that hairline?!

[@ajktigie]

Dialog Enhance feature is a must if you are watching a Seagal movie.

[@dnickx]

Dude...I thought recognized that famous actor that is always in Seagal movies, it is Byron Mann, the guy who played Ryu on Street Fighter the Movie, oh...how the mighty have fallen haha

[@markiangooley]

Seagal really loves those tinted glasses…

[@jackwells8107]

Rob Van Damme is SO excellent - Mr. Monday Night himself.... You keep making fun of 'that superstar guy, but not really', so I had to look him up. He was in freaking Man with the Iron Fists which is such an epic movie, and definitely one you should cover.

[@andreiaromanesei9270]

Lmao, that Afghani national is a Romanian actor.He played a thug in the Romanian HBO series Shadows/Umbre. Really great role

[@aranerem3767]

What movie is after this Absolution?

[@RedEyeReviews]

Sniper Special Ops!

[@StuPV]

14:14 - He says 'bring me some scotch, johnny walker'. Not cigars lol

[@omario2069]

I wonder if the end credits in Absolution is canon to Marvel phase 4 :)

[@jonsnipe5484]

Seagal been playing music for 30 years😂😂

[@St4rTr3v1Ut10n]

14:12 He orders "some scotch, Johnny Walker." He's still probably gonna be there for 3 hours, but still.

[@morbionicle]

I need you to dub an entire seagal movie!

[@9094nancyj]

The funniesr part is when Seagal's assistant gets shot, then he bounces back to full strength

[@mallninja9805]

I love the way Seagal always swaps his gun from hand to hand. I'm sure he's trying to look cool somehow, but he always just looks like he can't figure out how to work it.

[@jpwickl]

I've never understood that for someone supposedly so studly with guns, he keeps putting his finger in the trigger well like in the scene where he has his gun out walking up the stairs.

[@ImaginaryTerrie3]

I saw that guy and all I thought was Jet Van Damn Li.

[@willygonutz9687]

Did he order SOME cigars? How long is he planning on being there? "Once I sit down its a three hour commitment" 😆😆😆😆😆

[@AztecUnshaven]

Lol, he didn't say "cigars", he said "some Scotch, Johnnie Walker" (Johnnie Walker is a popular Scotch Whiskey).

[@willygonutz9687]

@@AztecUnshaven Popular and goooood!😄

[@coolbreeze2.0-mortemadfasc13]

He ordered, "Scotch, Johnny Walker." Not cigars.

[@thedtvdigest4142]

Is this the one where Byron Mann's character is obsessed with a massage parlour, and ends with him remaining behind to head back to that particular establishment?

[@tomcruise1544]

The big guy name is Josh Barnett. Former ufc heavyweight champ

[@justinlynch3]

"We work for The Boss." Ah so after leaving WWE I see Sasha Banks became a crime boss.

[@blueorange9067]

Woah man, he almost didn't bang the hot girl, luckily you saved the day with that last scene.

[@stevemoore1219]

During the last fight when segal breaks the guys arm you can see his rubbery hand wabblling as he breaks it

[@pawnpure123]

The obligatory post credit sex scenes always get me!

[@RedEyeReviews]

Hahah it's his version of the Marvel end credits.

[@pawnpure123]

@@RedEyeReviews the SCU is real!

[@RedEyeReviews]

@@pawnpure123 #BringBackTheSeagalCut

[@grit1065]

Damn!!! You are obsessed with Seagal.

[@RedEyeReviews]

Haha. I made a promise to do every single one of his movies and shows....and that's what I am gonna do lol.

[@TBfilms657]

Haha this is great stuff, I don't have to sit through this shit and just watch the highlights!

[@RedEyeReviews]

Exactly! lol thank you

[@dongargon763]

Sitting Stevie the master of accents

[@judsongaiden9878]

What's with Seagal's "elbows bent" shooting stance?! Who besides him actually does that?! 11:02 It always insults the audience when characters don't make use of available resources. That's why everyone loves Ellen Ripley. 11:50 Choke him with his own tie! Show him why ties ought not be worn in combat! 13:37 He's old enough to be her fa...her GRANDfather!

[@Etherman7]

It's okay, even Slavs have trouble telling each other apart. That's why the bright tracksuits are so popular.

[@doktahv8837]

So George Eads' name is Jack in GSS. And his name is Jack in the new MacGuyver.... So we can say Segal is canon in the new MacGuyver universe...as a Mafia boss. Wonder if he {Spoiler} visited Jack's grave...

[@yogafire646]

Man with the iron fist 2, trust me you'll love it.

[@RedEyeReviews]

Done and done my friend

[@yogafire646]

@@RedEyeReviews thx for the street fighter review, reminded me of all the friends I tossed aside for the glory of JCVD!

[@RedEyeReviews]

@@yogafire646 of course! The path to JCVD is difficult but worth it haha.

[@connortf]

I think Segal says he wants a "scotch, Johnnie Walker", not that he wants some cigars and a Johnnie Walker

[@RedEyeReviews]

Lol I just need constant subtitles for this man.

[@connortf]

@@RedEyeReviews I had to put my phone's speaker up to my ear with max volume just to be able to barely discern what he said hahahahaha

[@RedEyeReviews]

@@connortf imagine having to mix his audio. Lol. These videos will be the death of me haha

[@fatthumbs2020]

So painful.. yet I can't stop!

[@7woundsfist]

good ole Byron Mann, collecting a pay check.

[@andychow5509]

I think the writing in this one is pretty good. It's like the ghost writer decided to not fill in any of the placeholder text.

[@ajktigie]

God we really have a club called ONE in Shanghai.

[@RedEyeReviews]

Lol that is a great name though

[@munstrumridcully]

Superstar guy must be like Wolverine/the Crow style immune to bullets. As he obviously has a bullet wound, but that exit wound should be the size of a fist! Instead it's more the circumference of a finger-- he's obviously regenerating like the Crow when Funboy shoots his hand and the Crow looks through the hole as it closes going "woohoo!" (Great scene, that, Funboy is being straight up murdered by Eric Draven sticking him with a bunch of heroin needles and doesnt say "help" or "please no" but "you're wasting it!"-- priorities, amIrite?!) :-)

[@markiangooley]

Painting a barn black doesn’t make it look smaller…

[@RedEyeReviews]

Lol amazing

[@hansjuker8296]

His movie titles originally needed at least one article or a preposition. The algorithm I created predicted his next Feature would be called "Above the Below" or "In A The"

[@aranerem3767]

Are you getting closer to Tarzan The Fearless?

[@RedEyeReviews]

Every day. Another step my friend

[@aranerem3767]

@@RedEyeReviews hopefully it'll be better than the garbage Steven Seagal movies. These Seagal movies are really bad

[@majinbooch3787]

Seagal a real actor he can play any ethnicity

[@Robytsu]

4:46 aim to the neck. Hit the forehead. Aim bot: on.

[@RedEyeReviews]

Hahah

[@nightshade7240]

Thug: okay, there is this one club Chi: the One club? Thug: no, this one club. This one club... Chi: the One club, got it! Thug: okay, sure, why the fuck not? The one club that totally isn't named the One club Chi: right, the One club, why do you keep repeating yourself?

[@hurricanekicka]

Rob Van Dam is now currently a retired pro wrestler lol

[@Oldschool1943]

please tell me that was a joke and that u wasn't serious about that rob van dam comment that u made? "who the hell is rob van dam?"

[@RedEyeReviews]

Lol yes I am aware of some of those wrestler people. But this one makes you think its gonna have Jean Claude and hits us with a Rob lol

[@Oldschool1943]

@@RedEyeReviews hahahaha LOL true LMAO!

[@face76]

RVD was a decent wrestler back in the day. I’m not sure if he wrestles anymore. But McMahon and Triple H said he changed the game. He was a skilled wrestler. He could do the moves off the robes, his finishers, and much more. Rob Van Dam is even spelt differently. But he was named most likely because of his martial arts and his similar looks to Van Damme. The painting of Seagal and the guitar reminds of years ago he was doing a tour. He came to place where I lived. I knew it would be awful music. But I just wanted to see the train wreck of a show. But ended up getting canceled or I forgot. Lol.

[@mollyanderson657]

This private company has the worst Payment system I've ever seen. If you're struggling to pay your mercenaries, maybe reconsider your company decisions.

[@RedEyeReviews]

Lol I have more faith in your ability than theirs

[@austindurham5736]

Anyone else catch that rubbery ass hand when he was breaking dudes arm lmoa

[@leoa4c]

What is Vinnie Jones doing in Seagal movies?! Did he have a fall out with Guy Ritchie?

[@P-C-Principle]

Making a movie with Steven Segal reminds me of that episode of It’s Always Sunny Philadelphia where the gang is try to get a bank loan for their movie so they don’t have to include Frank’s sex scene. Steve is the real life Frank Reynolds

[@BlackTearsYT]

He actually ordered scotch at the end, not cigars. The speech is super slurred but he said, "Give me uh, some scotch. Johnnie Walker."

[@sprouts5535]

Why are all these movies made in Romania

[@JorgeMoreno-bm2oz]

In some scenes Segal sounds just like Alec Baldwin

[@ajktigie]

HoHo the fighting Monk Made his return again!