Affair Proof Your Marriage - Dave Carder Part 1

You may think your marriage is safe from adultery, but that’s actually when it’s most vulnerable. Dave Carder helps you affair-proof your marriage by revealing how attractions can lead to affairs and how you can make wise, protective decisions.
You can find Dave's book on our store here: bit.ly/2RCqvLE

[@jeffmiddleton9259]

If you ever get tempted and we all do, run away just like Joseph did in Genesis, away from Potipher’s wife. Cut off all entanglements. It’s not worth the pain, hurt and shame!!!!

[@TheForeverLoveKD]

It's true. Not worth at all. Flee

[@jackjones3657]

This gentleman is inspirational! He is very charismatic and offers decades of wisdom here. What a blessing to have truly God-fearing seasoned citizens willing to impart their experiences.

[@Aaron-mp9sy]

If you think you might have an inappropriate relationship with someone ghosting is an effective method of ending the relationship. As men we tend to seek female validation. We need to seek God's interest and our own interests over what women want.

[@ggrace1133]

How selfish is that...

[@Aaron-mp9sy]

Yes, having an inappropriate relationship is selfish. Following God's interest is not selfish.

[@mom4christ191]

But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. James 1:15-16.

[@nancywidows463]

The car thing really clicked with me ...men DO have feelings! Eureka! But seriously, as a woman, this really gave me insight that I didn't have before. Thanks!

[@racheldaniels8803]

Very Amazing... Counsel... Thank you so much....

[@lizzbethsanchez5160]

My husband was caught in the beginning stages of texting this "Christian family" friend, then met 1 time(that I know of) with her on our 29 yr anniversary, said he was taking his friend Fred to eat for breakfast before church he never took fred instead took her, she claims she didn't know he lied to me, they planned this for 1 week based off of text I saw, he claims nothing happened idk if anything happened all's I know he came to her defense when I called her, eventually we are still together, but struggle every day he is still secretive locks on his computer but this is nit new dont know how to trust him😕

[@sonnyh9774]

May God bless you with encouragement, hope, discernment, and wisdom. There is always hope for the Christian because God can change the heart and mind of anyone. Worship God even when you don't feel like it just as we see David's example in the Psalms. Pray (especially with thankfullness) and get others to pray for you as intercessory prayer is so powerful. Keep seeking wisdom/answers from a multitude of counselors. Usually, both spouses have "grievances" and unresolved conflicts or hurt which can lead to bitterness. When Christians learn to resolve conflicts Biblically and "roots of bitterness" can be cleared up, then it opens the pathway of clear communication again.... which a close relationship needs. The "enemy" wants distance between every marriage couple which is a primary strategy of war (isolate, separate, frustrate or cut off your enemy's communication, supply line, etc...then they are easier to attack) Lou Priolo has a book called "Resolving Conflict" and Ed Wheat has a book called "Love Life for Every Married Couple". These are two excellent books that every married couple should read. We will always have "personal areas" to work on, so as God sanctifies us and draws us closer to Him then we will see ourselves being drawn closer to our spouse ... guaranteed, because as we become more like Christ, we will love more, forgive more, become more merciful, more gracious, more kind, more encouraging, etc... When we love through the Holy Spirit, God moves and works, but He doesn't always work as fast as we would like. We must work on improving ourselves, resolving conflict in a God honoring way, and trust God to work on our spouse in His time and way, so we do our part as best we can and trust God with working the rest out. God knows exactly what you are going through and He loves you, and He cares, and He will help you. Don't give up. Seek counseling from your pastor and "seek ye first the Kingdom of God and all these things will be added unto you". God bless you.

[@rachaelireland9467]

This is not something that's going to go away on its own. I would seek Christian Counseling go to your pastor. He's trying to get his needs met outside of God and his marriage. Even if you didn't do anything physically he's having an emotional affair. Him being secretive and defensive is a big red flag. There is a wound there is a lie that is feeding the Sneed. It needs to come to the light he needs other men to help him through this. I would not trust him unless he gets Gali Christian male accountability. What I had to do with my husband was give an ultimatum it's either the other person or women or whatever or me. That can be scary because you may not know what your spouse will pick but they can't go on thinking that they can have both. I do not Advocate or believe in divorce but sometimes spouse is need a wake up call. If this other woman is married to somebody else her husband needs to know right away. But I would do it through your pastor at church. Texting the opposite sex keeping secrets from you and lying are all huge problems. But God can turn this around and I would encourage you to pray like you've never prayed before. The thing about your husband's behavior is he's in darkness he's believing lies and he needs a miracle the truth in the light of God's appears to this Darkness because he doesn't have faith that what he's doing is wrong or that they won't be consequences or he's just justifying his behavior. And I really think that just going to your pastor and exposing this bringing it to light is very important. Even if he stops his behavior with this one woman something else may come up again. I don't mean to scare you it's just that he needs a deep healing from the Lord. And you need to get somebody a mentor a female Godly Mentor that can encourage you and what's right. Example Faith forgiveness the right kind of boundaries during this process it's going to take time it's going to take help from other Christians it's going to take perseverance. You're not alone so do not try to walk this on your own and do not listen to Ill advice.

[@rachaelireland9467]

Please look up dr. Doug Weiss on helping her heal and intimacy anorexia. You also need to know that you can't just give him your trust he has chosen to break it. There is good reason for you not to trust him. There should not be secrets and locks in marriages. He has to be willing to do the work and have the humility to earn your trust. Also men didn't want to be corrected and it's hard for them and we have emotions involved. So he really needs a champion male Christian who is trained in this kind of area to speak into his life because he may not listen to you right now but he may listen to another male

[@mom4christ191]

Shame on her as well. That is 100% not ok. You should NEVRR go out to eat alone with male if you are married- let alone someone elses husband!

[@anneandersen1797]

Great stuff.

[@abwdymoha5841]

I wish your channel more success and progress

[@manoniemoments]

Great information!🙌🏾

[@DanielHernandez-eb5mr]

Thank you for this very relevant topic.

[@hollyvondross9635]

Many men just never have enough women.

[@dudefromkeene]

Many men are never converted ...

[@dmac9658]

Affairs do not happen because the faithful spouse is deficient, but because the cheater makes sinful choices. YOU cannot affair-proof your marriage because you cannot control your spouse. You can only control half of the equation--yourself.

[@RmBxox2]

Study psychology and get some education in you

[@mom4christ191]

But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. James 1:15-16.

[@DanielHernandez-eb5mr]

Galatians 6:2 "Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."

[@DanielHernandez-eb5mr]

Genesis 2:24 "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave into his wife: and they shall be one flesh."

[@ysabelduran1247]

❤️❤️❤️

[@msclrawslammer]

Yes. Make sure you always have a credible explanation for it in case you get caught.

[@belindacontopulos4153]

I wish I could have heard from Dave, the guest, instead of predominantly the interviwer.

[@mhba9047]

👍🙏

[@stefanydower1350]

This is sin..the sin of adultery and there are serious consequences to sin. Addiciton, friendship, flirtation...whatever..it's sin...and christians need to repent!

[@angelavazquez2012]

How to you avoid reconnection when it comes to an ex spouse/co parent?

[@Aaron-mp9sy]

What makes you attracted to an ex spouse/co parent?

[@millier.206]

Recalling why you divorced always helps me 😂

[@dudefromkeene]

Magnet principle. As long as you keep the Magnets apart they don't slam together. Don't talk about deep topics, especially about your current spouse. Don't spend lots of time together. Pull back. Get your current spouse involved, ask them to help. Ask not to be left alone.

[@elitedrumlessons6174]

To all the wives: stay thin! Yes do your best to not gain a whole bunch of weight. This is a severe problem in all marriages, Christian or not.

[@RosemarieNorton]

I have had plenty of thin friends who’ve had husbands who cheated. And plenty of thick friends whose husbands think they are wonderful. I’ve been both thick and thin and my husband thinks I’m the best

[@kyledawson4535]

Wow that's actually very objectifying and completely missing the point of this talk.

[@jeupshaw]

Waste of time.

[@framboise595]

BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA 26 minutes of useless speech that never ever gets straight to the point ; I bet the other part is going to be as useless and unscriptural as can be ...