AITA Not Sitting Down With A Boy With ADHD (r/aita)

[@JDubs0623]

I can’t believe that mother in the story with the kid with adhd, I have it and that game sounds so much better than paper working, that’s one of the best way for me to learn and the mother clearly isn’t concerned with her child getting an education because he’s not gonna learn pen and paper clearly

[@thedestroyasystem]

ikr! One of my alters has ADHD, or at least lots of symptoms of it, and it's very difficult for them to sit still without something else to do. What the mom in this story did would be similar to asking them to put down the fidget toy, or whatever they're playing with, because "they aren't paying attention." Just because it's a toy, or in this story a game, doesn't mean it's silly or isn't helpful to the person doing it. People have different needs. Mom should understand that her kid's needs don't match what she thinks he "should" be doing.

[@magemastermlg6210]

Story 1: NTA, he is either the densest man ever or cheating, once you get married it’s the wife/husband you prioritize them not spend time with them till co worker comes a calling, the fact he’s gaslighting op and prioritizes co workers needs so easily makes me think it’s the latter

[@zerobolt9506]

Yea, but I'm hoping for the first one, so when OP leaves his stupid ass and the coworker moves in to claim the husband going with now that OP isn't in our way any more we can finally be together. He'll see OP was right all along and realized it's to late for him to fix things with her.

[@RRW359]

Why is everyone automatically assuming the husband is AH? She's his boss. He's clearly afraid for his job and doesn't want to get fired. I don't know if it completely gets him off the hook but people are still victim blaming.

[@DuckTapeWarrior1]

I’m doing calculus homework and that “What is up waffle gang” just made my day!

[@scarletassassin523]

Waffle gang let’s go

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

🧇💜🤗

[@pennyclark4844]

What's up waffle gang,hope you all had a great day.x

[@bubbles9287]

Waffles for all!!!! 🧇🧇🧇🧇

[@liviwaslost]

@@bubbles9287 pancakes 🥞 🥞🥞🥞🥞

[@indiashante1560]

The tutor actually taught the boy the right way for him. I have ADHD myself and so does my son. I teach my son the best way he can learn and it's shown since he's been home schooled this year. If that mother really cares about her child and wants him to learn she she tried different things too.

[@ella9310]

Story 2: I have sever adhd, I’m an adult and I can barely sit down for 45 minutes on a good day. That parent is going to ruin that child

[@mizv4043]

I have a kid on the spectrum and when he does not understand a concept the first way I teach I find other ways to get it to click. The mom is failing her child because she is letting her ableism get in his way.

[@Kristina-dl2jv]

As someone with ADHD, the OP from story two was super clever finding a way to gamify the learning and his mom should have learned from her.

[@amazinglynn]

ARE YOU ASHAMED OF US MARK? ARE YOU ASHAMED OF THE WAFFLE GANG??? YOU MADE US!

[@MarkNarrations]

😁😁❤

[@BiteSizedCrafter]

😂 You’re silly. I love it.

[@missm.e9914]

Daughter-in law "here are my rules" OP "here are *my* rules" Daughter-in law gasp!

[@raymondjohnson2744]

Story 3 : Turnabout's fair play. The parents aren't obligated to support two adults baby or no.

[@lvincent7493]

Story 4: I hope Luke becomes successful and cuts them all off.

[@averyguilbert6314]

As someone with adhd, I wish someone had done this sort of thing with me when I was his age, that mother is a monster.

[@chewiejew3788]

Story 3: don't bite the hand that feeds you. It would be one thing if OP and her husband were irresponsible, but that doesn't seem to be the case. NTA Story 4: OP is NTA for asking. OP is TA for staying married. Drop the mama's boy and try to soak as much money as possible in the divorce.

[@TheRockinDonkey]

The only rule that OP called ridiculous that I disagree with is the “no baby talk”. Children learn speech patterns from what they hear. The baby talk has an impact on that. That said, these are things that can be addressed if/when they arise, rather than insulting them with a list of “rules”. It smacks of pretentiousness and entitlement

[@crayolaclouds2696]

I have severe ADHD and if someone taught me that way, I'd be a math whiz. Instant gratification is how to get us to pay attention to something, especially that young. Candy, erasers, etc are genius

[@Athlynne]

Totally on board with OP3. They're essentially bankrolling the couple's life and ability to have a child, and those conditions were INSANE. Good for OP for clapping back.

[@marijkecuffe5488]

Story 2 is definitely NTA! She was amazing to be able to recognize the ADHD kid's needs at such a young age. It's a shame the mother dismissed her like that, that poor kid is going to have a rough go with school if mom refuses accommodations. I have 2 ADHD boys myself and we get creative with homework all the time.

[@magicalsheepie]

I get that she wants to take care of her baby, but the woman sounds nuts. No tickling or no cartoons rule. She sounds like one of those crazy helicopter parents. The no sweets rule is also pretty weird, because usually cutting these out completely might cause the child to just binge them once they have unlimited access to them.

[@shinxgirl2947]

Thats what happened to me I barely had any sweets other than holidays once I got my own money all I ate was junk now ive gained 25 pounds already.

[@Dragonprincess21]

Yeah I’ve heard so many young adults binge waving sweets and fast food once they have freedom. It’s best to teach them moderation

[@cheerella1277]

My mom didn’t let me have sweet during my developmental years so I wasn’t addicted at a young age. Over time, she taught to me about moderation. I didn’t have soda or sweet much till I was about 10 and now I’m not even interested in it now. Most kids nowadays have a serve sweet/sugar addiction, it’s hard to break

[@bellasmom2597]

Shouldn't be giving them money if they were in school sure but they dropped out they need to go to work.

[@muppetsrule1143]

I remember being tickled all the time by family and they wouldn't stop even if I asked. I was forced to give hugs and kisses. My family now mocks my bodily autonomy rules.

[@15oClock]

1. "Unprofessional infatuation" is an extremely generous description. How stupid is this man that he doesn't get this isn't right? 2. Education is inefficient when uniform. Everyone learns at different rates in different ways and to deny a method that works is to the detriment of the child. 3. Don't bite the hand that feeds you. OP probably should've been the adult in this situation, but the fact the couple were acting like this is telling. 4. You reckon granny did this on purpose to screw with Luke? I'd buy it. More sensible than OP staying in a marriage where the in-laws are extremely toxic and her spouse does nothing to stop it.

[@Original_Tenshi_Chan]

1. Considering OP said this has been going on for almost a year, yeah, her husband knows back-stabby tabby is infatuated with him, and he's likely been cheating with her. And unfortunately, it doesn't look like OP replied to any comments and it's too new for an update. =( 3. I agree completely. That one Redditor that called OP the AH is out of their mind. How does someone have nothing BUT the audacity to say "meet all these requirements or else you'll never see your grandchild! Oh, and make sure you keep those monthly checks coming!"? Even if they want to claim OP's list is petty and that the gf and son are "just worried the people supporting them and their kid, may not be responsible", I still disagree. The young couple have already shown they are unable to support themselves and unable to support the child they chose to have, they clearly have responsibility and judgment shortfalls, so I think it is only reasonable that the OP - the person literally paying all their bills - helps them learn to manage their money effectively and learn to save. It's a life skill they definitely should have learned prior to replicating, but if they think being taught to be responsible and self-sufficient is "petty and cruel", then I think that says more about them than OP. and 4. I get the feeling that there is a LOT more going on than OP is telling us. I don't care how vain someone is, who holds such a lifelong hatred for something done at age 8? Are they saying that NO other friend or family member has aggrieved anyone else in that family, except for Luke towards his aunt? Or that putting gum in her hair was worse than anything done to anyone in that family? It just doesn't make sense. I mean, if I asked you to name something someone did to upset you at age 8, would you be able to recall anything of any substance, let alone something that reaches the level of "you're dead to me!"? I feel like OP is leaving something out., especially since she let it go (let them exclude Luke all these years) without any push back until now that Grace was given money.

[@RRW359]

1. Or the boss is using their power to prevent them from getting openly angry.

[@suzieseabee]

The list of demands to see the grandkid story, they are teaching them a good lesson. What is good for the goose is good for the gander or what comes around goes around. It's learning the hard way but, some people only learn that way.

[@nerdygeekgamer5528]

The son and his girlfriend are basically blackmailing OP and her husband for money by telling her she can't let the kid watch Rugrats or let the kid help grandma bake chocolate chip cookies

[@suzieseabee]

@@nerdygeekgamer5528 can't let people get away with that. That's the lesson.

[@nerdygeekgamer5528]

@@suzieseabee the son and girlfriend do know blackmail is a crime but in the Us were I live it's not I don't know were OP and her son live

[@TressaDeFox]

don't bite the hand that feeds you - those kids needed this lesson

[@rainorld2493]

I wonder did OP son had sweet and cartoon? If he did. He is being a huge asshole taking this away from his child

[@lulutrinae5781]

Who TF Calls someone else partner at 2 AM IN THE MORNING IF IT"S NOT A LIFE OR DEATH SITUATION???? I feel so bad for OP, she either being cheated on or her husband is so dense and a flat out himbo Either way I'd draw the line at getting phone calls at 2 am in the morning for things that can wait in the morning. The "friends" behavior is clearly obsessed and creepy. The reality is I think the husband is fully aware of what's going on, or at the very least is having an emotional affair while the "friend" is trying to push it into physical. I'd honestly get friends and family together, let them know what's up and have an intervention with the husband instead of an ultimatum. OP obviously knows her husband better than all of us and if she thinks he's just dense and being polite that might be case, but I honestly doubt it.

[@angela-in5dx]

She’s being cheated on

[@lulutrinae5781]

@@angela-in5dx No duh. But I hate always assuming cheating too because sometimes it's just not the case and way off the mark. Expect the worst, hope for the best.

[@lisamanning2340]

As a parent to a child with ADHD, one of the techniques they teach us is multitasking. For example holding something in their hand and let the play with it. It does help them focus better.

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Mark please take care of yourself. Take a break, eat, sleep, take a nap. If you need to take a break from yt then do it. You need to take care of yourself. I really hope that your dad gets better soon. Hugs💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗

[@nonbinarybannana]

Knew you would be here lol

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

@@nonbinarybannana lol

[@Carla_Valjeta]

Second story: NTA because modern teaching courses tell you how to teach students with a wide range of things, the way OP went through the lesson was spot on, they noticed the student couldn't focus while sitting down and changed the lesson to be better for someone with ADHD, they did nothing wrong. Grade A teacher imo too.

[@dootznbootz]

As someone with ADHD, that type of teaching is a absolute godsend. I WISH my teachers growing up had done something like this for me. I know I wouldn't have had as many problems with learning (math specifically, funny enough) if I had a way of moving around and associating my movements with what I am learning.

[@ShappyMusic]

Story 2: Holly shit NTA, she just learned that the child has adhd, picked his difficulties, and made a game to make him learn past that, she is awesome :o

[@dominiquevanerven7464]

Thanks haha

[@pennyclark4844]

I always told my kids that there's no such thing as normal, we are all different,no-one is exactly the same.

[@Purple_Dragonfly2002]

As someone with ADHD that didn't properly learn their multiplication becuse of teaching methods that didn't work for me; the tutor is amazing they we're willing to find something that worked and they did so in a way that would help the child in the future. Honestly a tutor like that would have been a gods send for younger me.

[@smileylemon566]

Waffle gang! Story 1: NTA. Man, you set boundaries and he blatantly ignored you. I'm sorry OP but he's thick as a brick or cheating. Story 2: NTA. You accommodated it and the mother didn't like it because it showed her up. Keep doing what your doing OP because it really helps people. Story 3: Ah, uh. I don't know if I want to go with NTA, ESH or no one is. I think the rules are stupid, really. But I think it should have been dealt with better. However, OP was clearly offended and I think people have a right to clap back when they are. And that reply was truly, truly amazing. Story 4: this is such a hard story. I OP is NTA for asking Grace to share but I do agree with that commentor. Let Grace have her money and focus in helping Luke with yours and if Grace does complain then you have a perfectly good reason to tell her to not. OP and ex are TA for letting that blatant favoritism and toxicity to continue. Ex more so than OP because holy moly he seems like a doormat. Luke and Grace are both NTA here because they really can't control what's happening to them at the moment. MIL and FIL are massive aholes for doing that and they can sit on cactuses.

[@zerobolt9506]

Yea the last story was hard to decide, so I'm at a stand still on it. I think someone of the reddit posters where in the wrong thought, it didn't sound like OP was trying to guilt trip the daughter or force her, but just asked, I think the real AH's is the grandma and the soon to be ex, I can't really say OP is cause we don't know her personality or if the husband condition OP in some way, give how he acts I wouldn't put it pass him. People forget just how easy it is to condition others to do, say or act how you want, it may not seem like it, but it's not really hard if the person is easily susceptible to it. Idk maybe I'm over thinking things a bit

[@Boingoelf1]

Story 2. As someone who struggled with math in school the way op taught the boy makes him NTA. If it helped him learn then he did right. I have ways I learned math that helped.

[@brigzbeebroadcasting2870]

I really like story 2 OP's methods, but wow the mom.... totally stealing OP's method regardless of if the kid has adhd or not.

[@dominiquevanerven7464]

Hi, OP here. Let me know if it worked!

[@dominiquevanerven7464]

OP from story 2 here! I wasn't even aware of this channel untill someone in the comments on my post mentioned it. I didn't expect my post to blow up the way it did, let alone have it end up in a video. Thanks though :) Btw, you have a very pleasant voice that's very nice to listen to

[@alley271]

For story 2: As someone with adhd growing up I wish I was taught with a game like that. My dad would get furious at me for not being able to sit down and pay attention.

[@danpeters6874]

I have adhd, I struggled badly in school. Having to sit for 7 hours in a classroom, then go home and do homework was a nightmare. I would have loved to have a teacher who made learning more interesting. One problem with today’s education system is that everyone is expected to learn the same way and if one kid learns differently, they’re treated like something is wrong with them

[@camdanebbett-urquhart9443]

Story 2 I have adhd and they are 100% nta and good medical professionals will tell you that you need to work with kids with adhd so that they can learn if siring down to study isn't working then try something else you make ot clear that at school they have to sit down etc but at home you should be trying to work with your child idk how many time I was told to sit down and pay attention but that just didn't work and I got left behind in school because of it op made more progress with one game then all my middle school teachers combined congrats op

[@Lynx-og5fd]

I NEARLY DIED WITH THAT ASMR WAFFLE hold up the mum had a problem that OP used the little guy's ADHD to her advantage. clearly mum's gonna cause him to have struggles.

[@dougmartin2007]

As someone with ADHD I can say NTA, you got the kid to learn and focus, but I also see what the mom was thinking. No matter how good a technique the OP used schools won't care. You have to learn to sit still even if your mind wanders. Likewise when you get a job. You can learn to work with ADHD rather than against it, but there are still some things you need to learn. When doing homework I would lot, say, three hours for homework. Then I would decide the work into three parts. Get part one done, and spend the rest of the hour playing video games or something, so that my mind gets the chance to wander and do different things. Then hour two repeat. Same for hour three. Mom needs to learn some of these things for her son to succeed.

[@CensorshipVictim]

Story 2: I'm a special education teacher and what OP did was brilliant. Kids with ADD, need different approaches to learning and I think the mother was jealous because OP found a better way to teach her son that was effective.

[@SherriLyle80s]

2nd story: NTA definitely. I have an ADHDer and she does not absorb any information unless she wants to be interested. Sitting will not help. Medication and teaching in a different way helps tremendously. Sitting for hours after school does NOT help at all. That mom is sitting her son up for failure.

[@TheZombifiedFairy]

Story 4: NTA for asking. It was a question, not a demand. The girl is selfish, the ex is an enabler, his parents are horrid. That said: you are an AH for allowing your son to be isolated and emotionally neglected by your ex and his family. The whole family is monstrous and poor Luke needs to run for the hills.

[@Nyanx4]

Waghh! Surprise ASMR jumpscare! You gotta warn me before you start whispering in my ears, Mark!

[@beckaworcester8313]

I started listening to you while I was pregnant, and now my son (1 month) falls asleep when I play your videos. ❤ Thank you for the work you do!

[@CL-lx2pm]

I wish my husband would say "stop worrying she's harmless" after I got shoved. Tsk.

[@CocoCece08]

I'd have kicked his ass... and hers.

[@yourneighborhooddeadpool488]

2nd Story: I’m probably someone who has ADHD (getting tested soon) and I work best with puzzles and matching games. It’s very difficult for me to just sit down and learn from a computer or with my parents when doing homework. Children work best in different ways sometimes and that’s what you got to do. That mom is a MAJOR AH. Not only was he learning from the tutor, he was enjoying the game they were playing. She also wanted the tutor to learn her way which doesn’t work for him. Ridiculous. I’m actually kinda pissed at the mom and feel sorry for the son.

[@katherineburton1766]

Omg! That whisper had me laughing my ass off! I haven't even heard the actual stories yet. Thanks for adding some levity to what started out as an irritating day! :)

[@MarkNarrations]

Hah a pleasure Katherine :)

[@friend1235]

Being a person with ADHD, I wish I had someone like OP in Story 2 when I was that age

[@gou0630]

I would call the HR department letting them know about her behavior since calling at 2 am is not OK

[@sedna3228]

No cartoons or sweets for a kid?? The lady in story 3 is going to be a terrible mother

[@rainorld2493]

She's going to lie to the kid he have allergies to make the baby eat qhat she wants. She will not let the lid evene watch cartoon or have friends

[@canadalovesanime3137]

Story 2: NTA OMG that OP I wish I had teachers like that when I was in school. I had a teacher who would make me sit on my hands. I had to learn to "act normal". The teachers called my mother and TOLD her to "get her on medication" and "she is out of control". My mother was told I wouldn't be allowed to go back until I was medicated. My mother listened, I was put on Ritalin. I don't remember 6 months of my life. My mother told me she would have to trick me by putting the pills in my food (also to hide it from my father) He didn't want me "doped up". The first few weeks I would scream and cry hysterically right after taking the pills. So mum just decided to give me half the amount, without talking to the doctor. She says it was the best time of my childhood. I don't remember any of it. Then our family doctor moved and the new doctor refused to prescribe that "poison to a child". (thank you to that doctor). As an adult I have taken Adderall which is a way better medication, (but I can't afford it $2.50/ capsule 3 times per day) If only teachers were more understanding when I was in school things would have been a little better. (Since I love learning) Story 3: NTA What is she going to do when the kid starts daycare/school. "Sorry you can't teach/see my kid until you ban all treats/cartoons from the the class." Sorry that's not happening; plus this kid will grow up resenting the mother. Also great way to foster addictions/eating disorders. Or is mummy dearest going to lye to family/friends and claim the child is allergic to whatever mummy doesn't like? That mother is in for a rude awakening. She is a control freak. Story4: NTA My aunt labeled me evil for something I did at 8 yrs old. She treats me like garbage. I tried to apologise but she refused to accept it. "What are you apologising for?" When I responded that I wasn't sure but I didn't want any bad blood for the family. (My mother told me I needed to make up by saying sorry for what I did. When I asked; she says she doesn't even know why aunt is mad) I told her I don't know why she hates me, she called me a liar, "You know exactly what you did. I won't accept it until you admit what you did, don't try to play innocent." That was it; I walked away and washed my hands of the situation. My aunt uses that as an excuse to bad mouth me, my mother calls me a "sh*t disturber" and a "troubled drama seeker". That poor kid, his dad should give him $200000 to make up for grandma's very sick behaviour.

[@DarkAngel65989]

Story 1:OP is not the Ah, OP have express her family about this many time and the husband isn't taking it seriously and making her feel like she crazy. The other woman is clearly showing that she love the husband, I hope the husband isn't cheating but OP need to talk to him or reconsider the relationship. Story 2: OP is not the Ah, it's clear that the mom isn't getting the help for her son and what OP did was smart and good for the boy, that is something you suppose to do to help the kid like that. Story 3:ESH, for one being petty and stoop to their level instead of talking to them about, also the gf's rule a few of them are dumb and her suspect that you weren't good people is bad. Story 4: ESH, OP instead of cutting contact and doivicing the husband and his family emotionally abuse the son, and OP expecting her daughter to share the money, OP knew the Mil wasn't going to give anything to son, she should of started a college fun for him.

[@abdullahalali3962]

What kind of monster skips the waffle

[@sourpatchkid6092]

People who like pancakes

[@lyndellrobinson3611]

A member of the Monster Squad.

[@abdullahalali3962]

@@sourpatchkid6092 lol

[@olly2027]

Me.

[@Nihlus16]

Okay story 4 is very sus, I really feel like OP is hiding something about their son, Luke. Maybe it was a pattern Luke was doing and the bubblegum in the SIL's hair was the tipping point, or maybe SIL was a child with an illness that caused hair loss and so the bubblegum incident made MIL lose it. Either way, I conclude-- ESH, EXCEPT Luke and Grace. The parents for enabling the favoritism (and possibly not getting Luke help IF he was a troubled child), the in-laws for treating Luke like garbage and ofc OP for trying to guilt-trip Grace to sharing her money: knowing too well that MIL will snatch that money right back the moment she caught wind of Grace sharing. Love watching/listening to your videos Mark! I was enjoying some lunch and doodling when I was listening to this, keep up the amazing work!

[@nerdygeekgamer5528]

In the first story if I was OP I would pack all my things everything I own and while he was at work and leave and serve him divorce papers and place a note with it saying enjoy your new wife and new life

[@KittyKittyPeowPeow]

The mother in the 3rd story is NTA, she's basically getting blackmailed by 2 high school drop outs that financially depend on her. If she were to cut them off financially, would they be homeless parents without her help? It's very common for people to use their children as emotional blackmail against family and this applies for every generation, not just parents.

[@ixhde]

In the intro when the cat meow'd i started looking around cause i thought it was my cat-i dont have a cat🤦‍♂️

[@MarkNarrations]

🤣🤣

[@Jessidafennecfox]

@@MarkNarrations what is your cat's name they sound like a cinnamon roll

[@TheNormExperience]

20:34 it always cracks me up when Mark cracks himself up 😂

[@shizanketsuga8696]

Story 1: I can't know that from hearing the story, but I understand how commenters get the idea that the husband is cheating. When the co-worker behaves _that_ inappropriately towards OP that's the exact time when the husband _has_ to put the kibosh on that and not dismiss OP's complaint because he didn't have feelings for the co-worker. OP is completely justified here and NTA. Story 2: The people saying that OP should just have done what the mother told her to do would have to argue likewise for a doctor prescribing a treatment for the child to just prescribe what the mother tells them to prescribe. OP did _excellent_ work for the kid there and the mother is TA of the story. OP is clearly NTA. Story 3: I can't quite agree with OP's emotional reaction, but feelings are not subject to ethical evaluation, actions are. And I can't object to those as it is both appropriate as well as quite funny to react to a stupid and condescending list with a stupid and condescending list. Why the son, who has to know his parents well enough to know that they don't need such a list to behave appropriately, didn't stop his wife is beyond me. OP is NTA. Story 4: This is an ESH with degrees of suckitude for almost everyone involved. OP sucks a bit for realising that her in-laws are acting insanely unfairly towards her son but apparently only going after her daughter, probably the softer target compared to the in-laws and her husband who she should _actually_ confront. The daughter sucks a little bit, because it would clearly be _good_ to show empathy and stand with her brother, but on the other hand I can't fault her too much for trying to stand clear of a conflict that is not really about her. MIL and FIL obviously suck as they seem to genuinely _hate_ a guy for something he did as an 8-year-old and still act on that hate, and OP's husband sucks just as much if not more for blatantly enabling their abusing _his fucking son._

[@Cryptid_in_the_Cellar]

As someone with adhd... SITTING DOWN AND TRYING TO LEARN FROM PAPERS NEVER WORKED FOR ME, it was so frustrating for so many reasons! Like I constantly had to re read everything and still picked up NOTHING, I'd read 1 page like 20 times over and nothing, now when I was engaged with and it became fun I usually got it done so much faster! I would legit cry when being forced to sit and "learn" that way (I just learned I hated trying to function that way) it made me feel wrong/stupid.

[@bioshockbrat9171]

story 2 is misleading, it should be titled, "am I the asshole for tutoring my way instead of the way the parent wanted?" - plus he learned a lot more from the game than the sitting down method. I would rather see the kid make progress than be stalled out. I was left behind in maths because I didn't have other methods to learn and was really just pity passed

[@arronbenton-fife4123]

WAFFLE GANG EEEEEEP -Ellie

[@agroteraaaa]

i concur

[@ThePinkBinks]

I think the parent was angry that her kid has ADHD and thinks the best way to cure it is to act like they don't have it. "Normal" training methods or none are all. She's sabotaging her child, sadly. Refusing him his best chances will set him up to fail. Poor kid.

[@des1279]

That whisper scared tf out of me 😂😂 I’m wearing headphones lol

[@TheZombifiedFairy]

Story 2: NTA. I tutor and specialize in learning disabilities and accommodations. "Tough cases" are given to me. Rule number 1 is meet children where they are. ADHD won't allow your child to stay still? Lets find something that makes them focus! 3x3? I always had a bag of skittles/small candies or a healthy treat if the parent requests. Change the 'x' as "groups of". "Billy, if I have 3 groups of 3 skittles, how many skittles do I have?" Kids LOVE snack math. Toy math works to. I've brought all sorts of props to sessions and the kids go NUTS. Parents, you are PAYING us to help your child. Sit back and let us give you your money's worth (and a good show).

[@autumngarcia7562]

I bet the girlfriend will forget about all those rules when she realizes that it's just easier to let the kid watch cartoons with a baggie of snacks although I agree on the no tickling thing

[@jackcheuvront6674]

The adhd story is NTA, medicate your kids, I have sever adhd, and I never would have made it through k-12 without my medication, if she doesn’t want to medicate her child then she’s got to deal with how they learn naturally, if you want an adhd effected child to sit and learn then medicating them is one of the better ways to go

[@Helmaron1538]

If the Girlfriend's parents are not to be trusted I wonder if that's why she said 'no tickling'. Did her parents physically abuse her. I hope not but that might be part of the reason.

[@ShiftingFixations]

10/10 management of ADHD in that story, oh goodness. I have ADD but my symptoms align mode wire with what you see when you look up “female ADHD” or “female ADD” (the two were combined under the ADD label in recent years, I was told) because as it turns out, it can manifest differently across the sexes. Interesting, right? Well, I got lots of flak in elementary and middle school for drawing in class, talking a lot, taking a long time to complete tasks, getting distracted all the time, losing things, being bad with time management, etc. despite me being a student who would get good grades if restrictions were lifted. Given extra time on a test by a charitable teacher? I’d end up with an A or B. Given a 1-minute-quiz (yikes), I’d have less than half the problems done in the allotted 60 seconds, even though the ones I did, I did right. It wasn’t an issue of me being dumb, but an issue of time and often a distraction-filled environment as other kids finished their work and started whispering or moving around. That was pre-diagnosis. I got diagnosed in sophomore year of high school. So let’s see, what can we learn from this? When teachers allowed me to have the environment I needed, I had better information recall. I could do better on short answers, better on math, everything. If they didn’t give me that, I’d APPEAR stupid or like I was half-assing things. Doodling in class kept my body still and my mind focused. When I’d be told off and forced to stop, I was distracted and picked up less of the lesson. The fish cannot climb the tree. That boy has movement-related hyperactivity (mine is almost wholly in my mind) so you let him move and suddenly he becomes a good and focused math student. He’s not dumb, not at all. He’s just better when he isn’t forced to be still. So! I hope OP takes these neat methods of handling ADHD/ADD onto future students! I hope the boy’s mom can get past the whole “stillness is the key” thinking because that’s foolish.

[@fhuber7507]

3... NTA Daughter-in-law made her list and said "obey or don't come over. " OP gets to say: "Here's how you get money."

[@perlamedrano3637]

Story 1 Wife: Come get your Dog!! Husband: oh she don't bite Wife getting shoved around: YES SHE DO

[@tianarose3085]

i have adhd and only recently got diagnosed as an adult. my whole childhood i could not focus on anything like homework and my studies really dropped as a result. i wish i had someone like this to help me out. he will likely grow up thinking he is dumb because he cannot sit and do homework when really, he just learns differently. this is so sad.

[@reasonpeason847]

In story 2 with the son with ADHD, I hope that kid thinks back to that game and understanding the questions and grows up knowing something works and he’s not broken or something. I have ADHD and I think of it as a victim of my generation I didn’t get medicated until I was 27. I remember being placed in advanced math when I was in the 3rd grade but failed miserably at understanding it. I remember having failing tests which meant I needed to take it home for my parents to sign. I remember having a breakdown crying and begging my dad to sign the test and not tell my mom and he said he had to tell her while I was locked in my aunt’s bathroom. And 8 year old panicking that hard is not normal. It was the time when ADD was over diagnosed and children were being over prescribed ritalin, it was when the stigma against mental health was worse and ADHD wasn’t a known acronym yet. I don’t have any resentment towards my parents whatsoever because even the internet wasn’t a readily available tool at the time. They really couldn’t have known or just looked up “why is my child like this?” for hundreds of people to give their input. The mom of that boy has no excuse. She knows what his condition is. She has resources upon resources for how to work with it and instead she decides to treat it like a parent would when I was a kid. OP is a great tutor for having ways to engage with neurodivergent children. Like I said, I hope this kid remembers this one time it worked, this one time he was able to grasp the material and knows he is t broken, just that people aren’t willing to let him succeed.

[@JEDIPrincess12]

I am personally pissed off for OP in the first story. I would not be okay with my husband talking to his coworker out of work and even more so going to see her outside of work. I am so mad right now.

[@allisonavery7273]

Even if it was just a male friend when they want to grab lunch or hang out on the occasional weekend??

[@JEDIPrincess12]

@@allisonavery7273 If it was someone clearly attracted to him. If it was a straight male that would be different. Or hanging out in groups. But hanging out one on one with a girl clearly attracted to him is not okay.

[@allisonavery7273]

@@JEDIPrincess12 that's fair

[@Mspryce4]

Story 3. Definitely NTA. As far as I’m concerned if the parents were good enough to raise a good son and for the both of them to not only have a good relationship with the parents before this and rely on them financially and there old enough to have a child then they had no business writing and giving that list in the first place. I wonder if anyone else got given a list like that from a love one (especially a child you have a good relationship with ) if they would feel calm about it.

[@brigzbeebroadcasting2870]

Would you rather 1) your husband be cheating on you Or 2) him be oblivious to something extremely obvious

[@CL-lx2pm]

Not only oblivious, but actively downplaying and demeaning OP's worries and frustration.

[@brigzbeebroadcasting2870]

@@CL-lx2pm true, it's loose loose either way. OP should either get marriage counseling or leave.

[@schokigirl1989]

Story 2: I don't have ADHD and even I would like to learn like that over sitting down & stare at a paper. Fun is a great learning method for everybody.

[@fhuber7507]

1... NTA. 100% report that stuff. He's going to her house too much... he's already cheating.

[@jeandobkowski8571]

I worked as a Teachers Aide in spec. ed. and what you did was wonderful. It proved to the child that he could do it! and you did not fight the ADHD. every child learns differently. NTA...

[@jacksparrowismydaddy]

as an adult that grew up with a learning disability I applaud anyone willing to try and understand a struggling kid. it seemed my entire schooling was " you have to work and study harder than everyone else now." like being disabled was my fault or something so getting punished for it just made me give the fuck up. that mother is just as bad as what I grew up with and I feel really bad for that kid.

[@ajb7530]

Last story, OP your in MIL, and husband are the AH for mistreating the son luke and fir your husband to allow it to happe. Since Luke was 8 years old, I would tell them to get over it. Because it a 1000% clear favoritism.

[@littleolmee]

Story 1: NTA. What her husband is doing is enabling this co-worker's actions. That giving his personal number is looking to cheat. Story 2: NTA. OP was doing the right thing. The issue was the boy to study, if he has ADHD he's going to hav issues with sitting down and might not learn. If his mom can't deal with him what did she expect a teen to do? Story 3: ESH. The kid's making a list was stupid especially when they are being financially helped. I think I'd have tried to correct them in a different way like find out where this was coming from. Story 4: ESH. All these actions were abusive to the son. Still, the money was given to the daughter & it's not right to take from one and give to another.

[@randomn4me205]

@vergorance I disagree, I would say ESH too. I was given a list for dealing with my nephews which only had two items on it both of which were very reasonable. Being asked to not be racist or sexist when in the presence of a child implies that you think that person is generally racist and sexist normally and needs to curtail that behavior when dealing with the child. I would have been angry too but going back with a list of their own is very much two wrongs.

[@cheerella1277]

For story three I think YTA. She girl is 21, pregnant, low income, about to raise a baby in the worst social, financial, & mental climate plus everything is loaded with sugar, trans fats, sodium, and high fructose corn syrup. She’s trying to do her best. OP is upset because she doesn’t have free range and is financially abusive. “If you cut off access, I will ruin ur life” in simple terms.

[@insertrandom5712]

@@cheerella1277 the women who was pregnant also tried blackmail, ops the cutting off finances to their family is fair they shouldn't be expected to support them if they can't see the child, its not like their expecting free range, but that if their not gonna be able to be apart of their life then they won't financally support it,

[@cheerella1277]

@@insertrandom5712 that’s fair it’s op money and she can do whatever but it’s still sil child and if that how they want their child to be raise then so be it. Most likely sil lived with abusive parents so she’s needs to make boundaries to be comfortable. And I’m 99% sure sil parents are horrible ppl and the special rules is become of them.

[@insertrandom5712]

@@cheerella1277 that still doesn't excuse Sil trying to blackmail them with their child, i mean get rid of these rules or you'll never see them is pretty bad, Op did a if i'm not able to be apart of your life i won't support it, vs if you don't support my life you won't be apart of it,

[@darkshadow5581]

Story 3 NTA. Petty? Oh absolutely, but if someone doing you a huge favor, mabye be more careful when doing something that could be seen easily as disrespectful

[@fhuber7507]

2... NTA. OP figured out an effective way to work with the kid with ADHD. Kudos to OP.

[@sianchild]

I used to tutor before working in a school, and I've come across parents who have set ideas of how kids should learn (usually a Victorian style of sitting and rote learning). It's incredibly frustrating.

[@Sir_Gerald_Nosehairs.]

And the Luke story..we can only go by what we've got, but grandparents don't usually turn against a grandchild SO vehemently, never mind over something like that. At 8 years old there's a limit to how long a line of things it could have been the last straw of. It just seems odd all round, tbh.

[@Chiller-pc1dv]

Story 3...NTA. They are lucky enough to be receiving financial support from OP and her husband, but for some weird reason...they have the balls to be like "oh, here's a list of rules of basic human decency that you must follow in order to see your grandchild, since we aren't sure that you won't be complete pieces of shit!" Just...this is not normal.... What reason would they have to treat them like this, what reason would they have to not automatically assume that they will be decent people? There is no excuse to this insult of their character, I don't care if the girlfriend had some horrible past with her parents...that is no excuse to treat other people like they can't be trusted, especially when they are nice enough to be helping them financially. Like unless they have actually done something to deserve this....there is no reason to be acting like this. 21 is too young to be having a child, and this shows clearly with the girlfriend's behavior, and lists of rules for the grandparents.... No sweets? No cartoons? Seriously? She sounds like those crazy overbearing, radical Christian moms, who think cartoons are teaching their kids witchcraft. It seems to me like she's trying to prevent the grandparents from doing much of anything with the child..which is also potentially denying the child of a strong bond with their grandparents. Childhood is SUPPOSED to contain sweets, and cartoons and fun.... I helped my great grandmother bake cookies when I was little and I always had loads of fun with that, and I wish I could now, just so I could see her happy face when she saw how much I've improved with my baking...but she passed away this past year. Not to mention, without the parents of the boyfriend's funds...they more than likely wouldn't be able to afford to care for a child...they should feel lucky and grateful, rather than the girlfriend's spoiled, bratty, passive aggressive attitude. OP wasn't even being extreme, all she wanted was a relationship with her grandchild, and just so happened to be nice enough to be giving these people her hard earned money to help with finances....but apparently, she and her husband may be denied that, if they don't follow a bunch of ridiculous rules....so, why should OP continue to give them the luxury of financial aid? Apparently they're "grown up" enough to be having a child....so why don't they have full responsibility of everything....like adults, earn their own money, and use only their own money to financially support themselves. Most people their age aren't financially stable, or mature enough to raise a child...which is fine..but god it pisses me off to see people diluting themselves into believing that "oh, everything will sort itself out! This won't be THAT hard! It'll be worth it, because babies are sooooo cute, and will love me, and make me a better person!" If they need the financial aid from their parents....then they probably can't support themselves well enough with their own funds...and if they can't do that...then they damn well are not ready to have a child. In the first year of childhood alone, costs, for the child at least $10,000 and not including medical expenses if in the US. But even still babies are expensive! A thing of diapers is $20-$30+ carseats cost over $100, cribs cost even more than that, formula ain't cheap either, breast pumps are $100+ and breastfeeding isn't easy, it can be painful, nipples dry and bleeding and sore. Also, thanks for the idea one guy in the reddit comments section! But what exactly makes you think that these people will listen to the advice of OP and her husband? It's pretty clear they don't exactly trust them to act like decent human beings...so why, praytell, the fuck would they suddenly welcome parental advice that they give? Like that's a nice sentiment, but....unrealistic. If the girlfriend has the BALLS to deny a relationship with OP's grandchild over something stupid and petty like this....then why wouldn't she take insult to the parents of her bf, trying to give her advice. Imma say this one more time.....OP....you are 100% NOT the asshole. (This is assuming that OP hadn't done anything to deserve this treatment, such as being abusive in the past, but I dunno.)

[@Keiji555]

story 2: NTA. You should report her to the school in question, and explain what is going on. ADHD have a hard time with focus, and often can't sit still. The mother is trying to force something the boy can possibly not physically do at all. He showed he does understand the source material, but it drives him crazy, and he can't think straight that way. Hell, if you want to report him to child services, because she is blocking his learning and education, and can be a form of child neglect.

[@MadameMushroom]

I have ADHD and would've loved a game like that, I couldn't focus in school and my teachers would just force the 'right' way onto me, as a result I still struggle a lot with math. NTA.

[@WBFNBS8809]

Mark your giggle after saying "Waffle Gang" so cute! Thank you for your time and effort and hard work for putting these videos together and loving us 💜🧇

[@michaelalpert8328]

I have adhd and autism so learning can be quite hard for me. With some subjects like Spanish and history my brother will help me. We’ll throw a ball back and forth while he asks me questions and it’s really helps me.

[@warrior2112]

I got ADHD and I'm the same as that kid same level and issues but I wish my teacher understood that I cant learn by listening to them talk for hours.

[@justine8387]

I have to admit it took me a while to listen to this one. Because I thought it would be awful and it triggered all those memories of having undiagnosed ADHD at school.

[@LadyLeomon]

1) OP is not TA but her dolt of a husband certainly is! Seriously, tolerating her rude, unprofessional behaviour in work then giving her his personal number *after* she’d been so rude to his wife and now he’s her fecking handyman too?! Seriously at this point this guy deserved to get the Bunny Boiler treatment (I find this a perfectly acceptable action on Crazy’s Part so long as a) Wife isn’t home but more importantly b) *no actual bunnies are harmed during her crazy-ass declaration of love!) 2) Not gonna life I thought this was gonna be a case of “I didn’t wanna sit with the annoying ADHD kid at lunch now everyone’s mad at me for upsetting him”, but no, OP did a good thing for both kids and the mom is being a Grade-A Bench, NTA! 3) ... Also torn between NTA and ESH, cos yeah “their baby, their rules” but they should give the *grandparents* the benefit of the doubt that they will do their best to be good influences for kiddo but at the same time they did borrow money so should be a wee bit more respectful of the ones who borrowed it to them ... just sounds like one big headache all round! 4) I agree, you are NTA *for asking* (assuming you did only ask and not guilt-trip) but YTA for staying and letting your son be ill-treated for so long ... seriously what mother does that? And what father lets it happen without immediately telling his family to cut that crap out? Thanks for the new vid Mark 💙🐱💙

[@leighnisbett9691]

To op in the second story,everybody learns in different ways ,if you make learning fun ,the teaching ,but if someone has a problem focusing by being made to sit down and work from paper ,it's not going to be fun ,if you make it a game children with learning disabilities ,they can pick up what they have learn .You put a different slant to learning by making it a game that focused his attention on the maths work ,it works with every subject matter that is taught ,this is how specialised education professionals encourage there students to learn ,by making it fun (a game).NTA

[@str4yk1dsw0rldd0minati0n]

Story 2: Definitely NTA, I struggle with math and stuff and have undiagnosed ADHD and my grandparents got a tutor that teaches the ‘proper’ way and I just started failing more but I had a teacher in year 7 that did heaps of different stuff to help me out and that actually helped

[@queencars802]

Omg that list is bonkers, I feel so bad for that child

[@samminicksm]

As someone who has tutored ADHD kids, for teaching reading comprehension, make them act out each page/paragraph/couple sentences depending on their reading level. My kiddos love it. Also, robot and Dino stickers. Edit: You can get gum out of hair by freezing it with an Ice pack.

[@teetimedolls807]

WAFFLE GANG!! I sweat ever time you say that at the beginning I always gear Waffle xDD

[@zerobolt9506]

Story 1: I really REALLY hope OP leaves her AH husband and let him see what he's lost.

[@t1995roger10]

This has got to be the most wholesome intro you've done, keep up the great work Mark!

[@JasperCatProductions]

No no no, if the son and girlfriend want free money, then they are going to get that attitude right back. If they are so in charge then that’s it I won’t pay for you. How ridiculous they are 20 gonna have a baby but still want mommy and daddy’s money. Get some jobs kiddos. Don’t get pregnant if you cannot pay for it,.

[@CL-lx2pm]

For real. The fact that they're apparently struggling and need financial support BEFORE having a kid? And they have the nerve to still be smug about it? They shouldn't be having that kid at all, let alone making unprovoked threats about keeping the child away from the people who are funding their life. Un-fucking-believable. Nobody that naive should be parents.

[@UnlimitedProduction1]

That's such an extreme punishment for what a kid did at 8 and downright hating the kid.

[@rahkemfleming6672]

Mark: I don't say thank you enough Also Mark: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

[@Plectrudefy]

Real waffle gang doesn't skip the initial waffle! Nice episode, as always!