ALONE IN THE DARK (Zero Punctuation)

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Yahtzee reviews Alone in the Dark while surprisingly neither alone nor in the dark.
Fast-talking Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw reviews a new game each week in this animated series that combines informed critique with cutting humor. Watch the next episode of Zero Punctuation a week early, only on The Escapist.
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[@Montesama314]

You know, "Together in Flames" doesn't sound like a bad game title.

[@Lyubimov89]

+Montesama314 alternatively a good name for HIM or Evanescence album.

[@LOLquendoTV]

4 year old comment but still, sounds pretentious AF

[@PokerPlayerJames]

Together in a Dangerous Space-Time, isn't far off.

[@Electric0eye]

Together: In Flames

[@jetmaniacs6329]

sounds more like a MICKAEL BAAAAAAAAAY movie

[@soundofmusing8747]

I need a series called "The Misadventures of Terry and Gonad"

[@PsyrenXY]

Gonad cloned himself to make Neverdead

[@domonicsdaniel4497]

Actually, I completely agree on you in terms of the fire. One of the best, if not THE best handling of fire in gaming history, indeed. When I shot a lock on a dorr with my gun to open it, and realized that the bullet was burning, it only took seconds for the whole door to burn down. That's some clever usage of fire physics that should be used in some modern games as well.

[@lowhp_comic]

So...the *actual* name of the game is called _'Together in the Fire'?_

[@Soitisisit]

Princess Lucina No, because that's a name that actually would've made me buy it. :) ( Seriously, it just sounds awesome enough that I'd buy it just to put it on my shelf. )

[@Soitisisit]

Princess Lucina Also, how was Smash?

[@Egalitariat-likesecretariat]

Soitisisit No kidding, it sounds like a depressed metal album - a good one.

[@jmanlogh9696]

Princess Lucina nah together outside of the fire

[@Egalitariat-likesecretariat]

Hotfoot Hopscotch. Fire Demons 2: Electric Boogaloo (Except the Electricity is More Fire). Big Scary Things 2: Wooooooo.

[@WordedDrake]

And he didn't even mention the ending!! They put you infront of the gates of hell making you mentally prepare yourself for the biggest boss battle of your life but instead of that you get a cutscene which tells you nothing and credits.... It was like they were in such a hurry to wrap up a sandwich that they just said ''fuck it'' and threw it away.....

[@kbPhionex]

he didn't finish the game though how could he have mentioned it

[@PorkpieJohnny]

I'M THE FUCKING UNIVERSE

[@MrPiccoloku]

At least we got the best worst line in anything ever

[@BFedie518]

so we can slot this alongside Neverdead in games that could have been awesome but only disappoint

[@unmessable12]

I AM THE LIGHTBRINGER! I'M THE FUCKING UNIVERSE!

[@donavenhollow5709]

The good ending yea? I'm probably wrong since the game doesn't give you a good fucking ending :P

[@unmessable12]

Donaven Hollow no, I think it's from the "bad" ending where Edward becomes Satan or whatever

[@donavenhollow5709]

That'd be the worst ending because no matter what, Satan possesses someone.

[@unmessable12]

Donaven Hollow ahh whatever, they're all bad endings because it's a bad game :)

[@donavenhollow5709]

Haha yea. It had a good thing going for it but it was too ambitious for the game developers making it lack polish in any of the mechanics and being rushed out the door caused the bad endings.

[@neferacronia6798]

I guess "Together in the Firey Brightness" wasn't a title they thought would sell.

[@quirda77]

It might have worked in a poetic sorta way

[@tomdonovan30]

Honestly that sounds like Wes Anderson's next movie.

[@Monroe-is1sz]

***** "In the tiny US State of Transylvania, Jerry Burns, the elderly Sheriff, must deal with his daughter and sons pyromania and his Danish roommates Giant Isopod collection whilst coping with his recent diagnosis of lung cancer. Meeting Jefferson, a young southern journalist, Burns slowly opens up to the world, hoping to gain a greater understanding before he passes. Stars Bill Murray as Burns, Own Wilson as Jefferson, Mads Mikkelsen as the roommate, Danial Radcliffe and Emma Watson as the siblings Burns."

[@eyjay1508]

"Together in Flames" sounds like a pretty good title.

[@quirda77]

On the flip side you could purposely develop the worst game possible for Yahtzee to review. im thinking the setting would be in the middle of a war between ethnic zombies vs a small band of white, burly silent males with at least one female character that you have to escort who's ai system is programed to run face first into the nearest group of zombies you see. This action horror puzzle platformer will have you trying to quick time event every boss to submission. It will include reworks of the same 3 levels, constant slow mo during unskipable cut-scenes, a zombie themed minigame of go fish to open certain locks, an unforgive able checkpoint policy and jump scares every corner. Ill call it Zombie storm 3: revelations, forever in the the dark (it will be the first game and not one part will be at night)

[@zyad48]

***** ugh the kinect will make him blow his top

[@ultimateninjaboi]

So Puzzle/JRPG remake of Resident Evil 5?

[@Kuuenbu]

+Adam Moorehead don't forget the regenerating health!

[@unmessable12]

needs to have real time RTS elements

[@Gammera2000]

Homebound Turnaround And Constantly sunny. and the zombies are mutants!

[@thomasstewart9752]

Either pause when looking at the inventory, or slow mo. Bonus points if you can re-organise the inventory to make things easier to get to.

[@angeldeb82]

LOL at the funny parts, especially with the Terry and Gonad part, the awards part, and the one that birthed the "Press X to Not Die" trope in TV Tropes! :D

[@nomadwhy1166]

Anyone watch past the music ? Something 'strange' happens

[@madeliner1682]

I believe it's the same footage from after the lego indiana jones review when he reviews the fourth movie

[@L1ONFIRE]

I played this game a good year ago, and honestly it is still on my mind... Due to the hilarity of all that happened when I played. Outside of the initial car sequence with driving away from an earthquake and getting slingshotted by the physics, driving was interesting to me. Funny enough though I recall a time where I was hunkering in a car to get loot out of it, and when I looked up one of the regular enemies smacked the hood once and every part of the car popped off like a toy. Felt awkward before he tugged me out of the car to try clawing me.

[@adrianshephard6321]

Man, finding Port Good Game must be like stumbling upon the fabled city of Atlantis in gaming these days...

[@zyad48]

unfortunately yes ;P

[@lukebengal1352]

Adrian Shephard Witcher 3. That's all

[@92Roar]

What would happen if a game development company watched every Zero Punctuation and took everything he liked from every review and turned it into a game? You may just get Silent Hill 2 with a portal gun and jetpacks or something really awesome

[@TheRelevantusername]

oh god. i can just imagine it. "YOU HAVE TO SAVE THE WORLD FROM ZOMBIES WITH THIS PORTAL GUN (which needs ammo, which i sell *cough cough pay up*) and a time rewinding tool." yay. actually that doesn't sound half bad.

[@RobitskiStudios]

He doesn't like zombies :P

[@TheRelevantusername]

RobitskiStudios silent hill?

[@RobitskiStudios]

Well, he didn't like The Last of Us because he said the zombie thing was a cliche, and generally he shuns games for having the ye olde 'HERE BE ZOMBIES! HERE BE SMALL GROUP OF SURVIVORS!'. I guess Silent Hill was of such high quality he could accept the zombies

[@TheRelevantusername]

yeah, but we're talking about a perfect game made with these things, so it'd be like silent hill 2 if it was done well (the theoretical game, i mean) and yahtzee would hopefully love it.

[@JioVega]

They should've just called it "lightbringer"

[@Chocl8215]

+BikouTenma or "The fucking universe"

[@ultimateninjaboi]

+Chocl8215 or "Fuck You, Anyway"

[@GalanDun]

+BikouTenma They couldn't. Linkara already had a comic of that title.

[@glav2948]

Lightbringer: The Fucking Universe

[@Penningtontj]

"Lightbringer" or possibly just "Lucifer" because they mean the exact same thing.

[@dumpstercast-refuseradio8429]

Dammit, Gonad!

[@PwnageMode]

3:08 GTA Online Down The Drain races in a nutshell.

[@guardingdark2860]

2:07 the History of the British Empire summed up neatly in one image. Well done, Yahtzee.

[@ToastyMozart]

"Gonad and Pillock's awesome game" This must be made

[@MilesTailsProwerfan9]

Thank you! Finally someone can see the potential Alone in the Dark had. Even though I still enjoyed it, the issues that he mentioned were VERY frustrating and required a large majority of my will power in order to continue, probably my due to my high tolerance to shitty gameplay after spending years with people who can't make up their fucking mind on ANYTHING! But back to the point, he's absolutely right.

[@zyad48]

"requesting that I verbally assassinate it" XDDDDD

[@timebomb4562]

glimpses of brilliance buried in clipping issues and spunk now that's the type of game that makes me saddest of all

[@shankybiscuit8109]

I actually quite liked the inventory system. The idea that each item actually takes up a physical space in your jacket/holster/back pocket appeals to me more than games usual 'TARDIS-pocket equipped jeans™' system. But yeah, that and the fire were about all it had. I did like the crafting at the time but mostly because I hadn't really encountered anything like it before. I have since learnt better.

[@blanktester]

I bought the game for 99 cents, and when I opened it I found that I had been given a collector's edition, which had the decent soundtrack to the game AND (for no clear reason) a copy of gears of war tucked behind that.

[@turkeysamwich00]

Oh Terry and Gonad. Could someone please make that a sitcom?

[@q306005]

I like the idea that going into the inventory screen and crafting items doesn't pause the game because that makes it more realistic. If you were in a fight in real life, the dude doesn't just freeze in the middle of spear-tackling you so you can pull a bottle out of your backpack to hit him with.

[@coolfunkDJ]

I think it worked PERFECTLY in The last of us, but I dont think it works in this game

[@drjackblack818]

How realistic is it to press a button to navigate ones fuckin jacket. They're some realistic mechanics that shouldn't be implemented in games, at least not with crud controllers.

[@Petman1325]

CoolfunkDJ (NotFromAtlantis) Another game it worked great in was ZombiU, but then again, you had a pretty big inventory screen, and it was on the Gamepad where you could just quickly tap and move things with your finger without using a stick.

[@jeremyr4964]

if we want to bridge the gap between casual and hardcore gamers we need to ALLOW PEOPLE TO PAUSE/SAVE AT ANY TIME. There's no fucking excuse for not allowing people with lives to pause and save. It isn't realistic and it's a cheap-ass way to make the game harder. These are vital game mechanics and should ALWAYS be present

[@chessmeister596]

A real life fight, no magical pausing. I agree totally. A game, that is by definition, not real, yes there should be magical pauses. There is a point to realism in games, the point beyond which the game becomes less fun, and more like real life. Making an ingame fight more like a real one, ie not fun, seems kind of dumb.

[@Gledster]

*waves from 2024* I'd forgotten about Terry and Gonad. Genius.

[@TheFluffyWendigo]

I stupidly rented the movie and had blood pouring from my eyes and ears afterward

[@adrunkwarhog5672]

Dont forget the mechanic where you have to close your eyes to see enemy weaknesses, because you know, the random tears in peoples skin isnt obvious enough to warrant shooting fire bullets that dont explode in the gun into someone arm tear with dead on precision.

[@xXAliceOfTheRoseXx]

I've heard that there's a huge difference in the Xbox360 and Ps2 versions, and I've only played the latter. I thought that it had a ton of innovative ideas, like using the medicinal spray as either a healing thing or a flamethrower. The story was terrible, and the characters were strange and boring, but this game has a place in my heart for "bad games that were enjoyable."

[@alechachman9599]

I got the 360 version for three bucks because I wanted to see if it was really that bad. It was.

[@HotaruKara]

This video makes me smile, so entertaining.

[@jaylex666]

Actually I got this on the ps3 and I have to admit it i freakin loved it. They really did a good job with itm the combat and inventory was restricted but made it more like survival, you were limited to what you could carry as you would in real life. The combat was more complex and the fire mechanic was superb. Love this game atleast a 7/10.

[@hawkeye611]

A friend of mine bought this game for me. It had a price sticker on the front for $1.76.

[@explodingtomahawks7589]

Still overpriced for this tripe.

[@Greatnik]

Has the music grown on my yet? Well, every time I start a movie, I hear the intro, so yes, yes it has.

[@finnishperson6401]

there are SO many different references to this game on other videos that i finally got myself to watch.

[@Blackacre438]

But the president we had in '08 was the same one we had since 2000. The inauguration was in early 2009 xP

[@13Hyrule]

you see escapist never really uploaded anything on youtube until 2011, aside from a handful of videos, then everyone requested all the ZP to be on here so they uploaded it in one chunk, it was on the escapist website well before it was on youtube, check the upload date of a heap of his other old reviews and they're practically the same day

[@RemUchiha]

Sad thing is, "Together we Burn" actually sounds like the title of a somewhat interesting game, though with a title like that I'd probably expect something more sophisticated than this.

[@overzealouseuthanasiast9731]

As the Terry here, yeah, that twat gonad ruined everything. The glue's at least nice though, 80% pure.

[@timebomb4562]

well that's a plus

[@storestian]

That pic fits so perfectly with that comment

[@MusicMushi]

that makes so much sense that I'm a bit worried

[@Spudacus]

I wish you made Let's plays of all the games you have played, this would be an awesome idea because you voice and personalty would be amazing when you find a bug with a game that you can spend 20 minutes complaining and I would still be interested ahah :D Just an idea :D

[@Spudacus]

Omg, My bad I just found the channel haha

[@MyDaywid1]

IAmNova and it is 1hr not 20 minutes better this way xD he's the best :p

[@lucariobro18]

wait what is the channel's name?

[@Spudacus]

Its on the main page, not sure but its one of them

[@MyDaywid1]

yahtzee19

[@pixlman]

"Royally buttfucked" hahahahahaha :D LOL

[@LeeLemon008]

There's just something I love about that image at 1:28 :D And 4:12, but that's more about the lead into it.

[@SnakeMan448]

"The game developers think that not having to play the game was a point in its favour" That line has gotten a lot worse in hindsight - at least here skipping scenes and gameplay didn't cost money.

[@TheSupergamer300Show]

I'M THE LIGHTBRINGER! I'M THE FOCKING YOOONIVERSH!

[@MrLukeimurdad6]

You just made my day. i saw your comment and died as a was reading it. thank you.

[@WHATISUTUBE]

now I wanna see those fire effects

[@ssbj144]

They are quite fantastic but obviously this game gets annoying after awhile because you just feel how it's so unfinished. This game truly had potential to be something really great. But kicking it out the door before it was ready, was a huge mistake which drops it from a potential 9/10 to a good 5/10 if not even lower.

[@henryjohnson9148]

I used to live in Azerbaijan

[@VoreTechz1985]

LOL! If someone serves you dog for lunch you don't stay for pudding! XD

[@spellcasterluke7387]

The Adventures of Edward Carnby, Serial Arsonist.

[@JUSTINYTS]

Its ironic because there where 2 developers working on this named Terry Smith and Nick Gonad

[@MiradoSamurai]

isnt the part about the shadows on the floor and the flashlight/light from doctor who when the were in the libary the size of earth?

[@Number-6]

"Let me tell you about the man I met when I was young..." I know that feel, bro...

[@CBBtheLakota]

a boy and his blob i win. thanks for playing.

[@Hakudohshi]

Puzzles, plus prince of Persia platforming perplexingly.

[@sirhalyavshik]

and possible jokes here also -split second -call of duty -resistance -crysis -far cry -cold fear -counter strike -most wanted and skyrim

[@serban031]

it's something a friend of yahtzee's composed for him

[@shotgunshells2]

i want to see you tear up knights of the old republic! please Yahtzee, do it for the internet!

[@noyvad]

haha, did anyone else notice the brain slug from futurama in the beginning?

[@mrct592]

Thank you!

[@TheRedpuff]

I never said it wouldn't. I just corrected him, saying he was FROM Australia.

[@BrenTenkage]

You know, I tried to play this game, I tried to enjoy it, tried my best to see the good in it....and it shat on my face when I gave it a chance to shine....

[@jumpercables]

Shadow of the colossus. Wild Woody. Spanky's quest. Sticky Balls. Nuts & Milk. Irritating stick. Those are all actual video games.

[@aperturesciencegames]

i wish gonad was a recurring character like the imps showing up to mock consumer bases like cod or bad design choices and staff like fable 3

[@sdettdewsf]

time is not really something reduces the quality of the game unless if we are talking about the games which showed off their graphics. Look at Vampire the masquerade, the game was released almost a decade ago and it is still a classic. Same thing with Grim Fandango.

[@danielevans545]

There was absolutely no way the telly needed a kick, it's just the display after all. That's like getting pissed off with the shower head because your boiler is shagged.

[@kevinsullivan309]

Gonad is president NOW!

[@sdmitch16]

thank you

[@COYADD]

You forgot the funny ass quotes. "I don't have you stone, and FUCK YOU anyway" And my favorite: "I AM THE LIGHTBRINGER, I'M THE FUCKING UNIVERSE"

[@ripleyandweeds1288]

Alternate Title: Through The Fire and Flames

[@COYADD]

I was completely confused by the bit after the credits.

[@turtlebeach960]

Bad camera angles seem to be a must for games these days.

[@lukefrancis8200]

Happy 9 years of your brain working properly

[@nicosxray007]

01:31.I start to think that Silent Hill 2 is Yahtzees' favourite game....

[@TheZickoPuppets]

Never heard that one before...

[@necogreendragon]

"sweary ninja for hire." I want that to be a game, or movie or anime or...... something. That would be awesome. >_> Believe it. >_<

[@XoxeroThePoet]

One of my friends told me that this game was amazing on the Wii. I said the following in response. "If it's so amazing on the Wii, and so lousy on the Xbox, then why did they release it for the xbox?" That shut him up pretty quickly. Of course, it is possible I imagined the whole conversation just to have a story that may (or may not) get up votes.

[@ClanChattan14]

anyone else notice the Futurama reference?

[@sqi8000]

@TheBen854 I retract my previous statement as dyslexia seems to be the cause here. appologies.

[@ptronic]

Look around you, he already is!

[@134Waffle]

Every time I hear Yahtzee say the word "inventory" my eye twitches a little.

[@SigSkyline]

Whew! And to think, I almost spent 99 cents on this at EB Games yesterday.

[@Tralfazz74]

Is it just a coincidence that I had a MacGyver marathon before I watched this?

[@tag4650]

Clive Barker's Alone in the Together in the Darkfire

[@cgunugc]

-Age of Conan -Portal -Stellar Impact -Bioshock -Crackdown -Mass Effect -The Force Unleashed -Halo

[@thecourierNCR]

DUDE! YOUR OBI WAN KENOBI!!!!

[@horiahunter]

Gonad is caboose's game maker cousin

[@ApexBovine]

I'm now 50 episode in and its still fucking hilarious ^-^

[@blade3337]

Don't forget Worms...

[@Kristidex]

comes in a box!

[@EpidemicPain]

just wondering,did anyone else see the ending of the video?

[@sdmitch16]

1:12 Can someone tell me what I missed at 1:12? "taking most obviously .. love interest"

[@timebomb4562]

Crowbarred in meaning forced in unnecessarily

[@TheNorseCrow]

-Haze -Condemned -Army of Two -The Darkness -Amnesia: The Dark Decent

[@Wolvinof]

The soundtrack's badass, though. =P

[@Mrredredgreengreen]

You should make a list of your top games(5, 10, 20, etc) Best or worst.

[@firefang225]

0:44 Jarate :D

[@ABronyNamedBurnie]

Little Inferno has probably overtaken the claim of 'best fire physics,' so the game can't even claim that anymore.