An Evolutionary Psychologist's Dating Advice - Geoffrey Miller

[@ChrisWillx]

Hello cult members. Here's the timestamps: 00:00 Intro 00:30 Why Women Aren’t Having Children Anymore 08:20 Evolutionary Psychology After 22 Years 16:23 What All Married Couples Need to Know 28:18 Responding to Critics of Evolutionary Psychology 32:32 The Difference Between Beauty & Hotness 44:08 The Psychology of Social Groups 54:26 Geoffrey’s Thoughts on the Manosphere 1:04:18 How Twitter Shows Human Nature 1:09:04 Is there an Increase of Slut & Simp-shaming? 1:25:24 Should Dating Apps be Banned? 1:32:56 Importance of Existential Risk 1:40:45 Where to Find Geoffrey

[@GuidetteExpert]

Its a natural instinct of a woman if she's attracted to the partner enough and his marriage material to want a child with him. If not then the partner isn't marriage material or fulfilling the females need.

[@ndndndnnduwjqams]

THANKS FOR THIS CONVERSATION CHRIS. Geoffrey is a star.

[@andylewis7360]

@@GuidetteExpert Certainly is. Because it's a point where her natural anxiety has calmed down, she recognises that it's due to his presence and she wants that situation to continue. And at some level she's aware that by having a child with him, she's locking him to her.

[@__-bz7wh]

Chris!! Get Professor Edward Dutton on, please!

[@GuidetteExpert]

Andy Lewis im speaking from a female perspective that there is a natural feeling of wanting a baby that only happens with the right man that fulfils her needs and reasures her that he will stick around. Seeing your spouse following instagram models and liking their pictures can shut down that feeling of wanting a baby with him.

[@CoachCee]

You are slowly becoming my new favorite podcaster on KZbin Chris. Love this interview!!!

[@ThursonJames]

Quickly for me.

[@theblackpianist1905]

Yes, I can’t believe how young he is and still so versatile in his speech and personality. A rare one Chris is.

[@adamhixon]

My biggest takeaway from this is the fact that evolutionary psychology is a new concept to some people. I never considered the possibility that it wasn't clearly obvious to everyone else. Really clears up a lot of confusion I've had over the years.

[@0MoTheG]

Have you discovered self-deception and stupidity? Mind blowing.

[@mrknarf4438]

Geoffrey's way of having an argument with his wife is pure genius! I love it! I wish one day to have that same level of self control and understanding to mock myself, even in anger. It reminds me of the book The Way of the Peaceful Warrior I've just finished, where one of the most important lessons is humor, not taking life too seriously.

[@tatianamangwi]

What Mr Miller said about the women and the feedback to them is absolutely correct! I feel in today's world, we mix up all issues and forget that women have problems they have to fix. I’m a fervent defendant of women but still believe in calling out women's BS. Both can exist!

[@ibizawavey8630]

This dating angle is so lucrative that every KZbinr is hip to it. People are much lonelier than ever before, dating is in turmoil and childless couples rising. But it's ok because you're working for a tech company lol

[@isee7668]

He's not a youtuber, he's a cool professor.

[@_BirdOfGoodOmen]

@Red Robyn lmao 🤣

[@eheheh3263]

Just because people are married doesn’t mean they don’t feel lonely though... there’s a lot of married people who are suffering in silence and think they have to remain married because until death do us part thing... life is too short to stay in an unhappy unfulfilled marriage men and women

[@DarrenRockwell]

Women want to suppress this information and manipulate it in the worst way possible for the sole purpose of skirting accountability in their ho phase. They don't care if it destroys the world. THANKS WOMEN.

[@James_36]

@@eheheh3263 how do you know they are suffering in silence? you are just making a baseless accusation to seemingly support your own bias

[@PabloGamedev]

I cannot understand why this podcast doesn't have millions of views, because every person alived in this world should listen to it. Thank you for your work Chris and Geoffrey, this is amazing.

[@davidmhaggarty]

That it isn't mainstream is an indicator of its quality

[@shasmi93]

I’m sure Chris would be canceled if he got big. So don’t wish for this to get big.

[@RYXPfan]

@14:30 I love what he said about simply understanding the differences between men and women (rather than making any judgement on them) then just moving forward with that in mind.

[@kasparovthegodofwar]

Just having Geoffrey in your show lets me know you are the real deal. Totally just subbed. Let's get David Buss on the show

[@ChrisWillx]

He's already been on!

[@kasparovthegodofwar]

@@ChrisWillx found it! Thx

[@keatonmccarthy8691]

@@ChrisWillx lol

[@GaryMLive]

@20:24 “you’ll almost never see actors in a serious adult drama actually make fun of their own reactions in a kind of wise and insightful way” what a gem of a quote

[@GaryMLive]

@23:28 “your brain isn’t this all seeing and all knowing thing. You can use the same tricks it’s trying to play on you against itself.” Gold!

[@sherlock7898]

My dad is a great role model, he managed to stay married to a woman who while is very smart is very difficult to live with. I am so glad he did, it’s been a blessing to us kids and I am so glad I grew up in a two parent household. As a woman I have a great male role model and an example of how to stay married long term. I can take his advice of what he did right and what he did wrong so I can make the best choice for me.

[@SmarterTebya]

your dad chose to have a life full of stress instead of having a great life with an obedient, submissive woman as it must have been. Congrats

[@christophlindinger2267]

@@SmarterTebya grow up

[@SmarterTebya]

@@christophlindinger2267 man up

[@christophlindinger2267]

@@SmarterTebya am married and have two wonderful daughters. Running my own business. What are you doing?

[@cam129]

@@christophlindinger2267 👏👏👏👏 love your response! People like Mike…they are best ignored as they tend to be complete losers and bitter.

[@langben7736]

1:13:43 - 1:14:12 Spot on! I feel like we as men lack the proper role models in our lives that we actually have a tangible connection with, rather than just some random famous person that we look up to that inspire us, sure we need that as well. But it's like we're forced into a life where we have to imitate behavior instead of being taught.

[@johngalt6838]

By design.....feminism, toxic masculinity rhetoric, abusive family courts. All this is by design to collapse a society.

[@OkTxSheepLady]

“There’s no expiration date on human wisdom.” 1:41:10. There does seem to be a resistance to listening to wise thoughts.

[@latinaalma1947]

Our entire field of psychology is under attack. So yes Jordan Peterson videos, videos like these, Busse etc are the best way to learn what people SHOULD learn as foundations of psychology.

[@0rnery0verwatch]

Really glad that he pointed out the differences between how men and women "fight". With men, it's physical most of the time... physicality is easily visible and understandingly shut down. Women, on the other hand, wage war with words... and that is still completely fair game. Not saying men don't do this as well, but women perfected it... and if you won't put up with it, you're considered weak by many. Don't get me wrong I'm not saying take out your pitchforks and demonize women for this (because again, men do it too), just pointing out that is so rarely talked in terms of "violence"/abuse...there are a lot of emotionally abused partners out there.

[@jaydamalley3398]

Important caveat here, though: Physical fights between men usually ends up with them being friends. Or at least finding some mutual respect, because they defended themselves. Whereas women who fight, physically or with words, they are enemies for life. So maybe we shouldn't be so quick to shut down physical fights involving men..

[@isee7668]

Don't accuse me of being a feminist, but I reckon 3/4's the time when a wife murders a husband, he probably deserved it! ;)

[@karthik197]

@@isee7668 what? Please don't pass down your genetics. Let it end with you.

[@bettermanchannel770]

Physical vs the woman's adaptive ability as the physically weaker sex to harness the power of words

[@isee7668]

@@karthik197 kf we can't make fun of horrible topics, what else to do?

[@kutark]

Man Chris you are killing it getting fantastic guests on!

[@ZeroStateReflex]

G Miller is an absolute badass. Evolutionary psychology is the rosetta stone to human behavior. Tens of thousands of years of strategy and relentless survival. Got smarter listening to this.

[@l.w.paradis2108]

He's a child. He spends time on Twitter, not with great art, literature, etc.

[@willstevenson9634]

A badass? Maybe rewatch his first few words on this podcast

[@talkingforever225]

Chris, I would love to see Lori Gottlieb as one of your guests. She is a psychotherapist who wrote a book called Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough. She delves into the standards that women have for men in dating and why many of them are keeping women from finding a good partner.

[@moonknight4053]

Because tora isn’t it obvious that society places more love and care into women than men. Society simps for women trhey are the little delicate lambs remember? 😂 my arse mate

[@pmberkeley]

My big existential risk is that education has become incredibly top-heavy, especially in engineering. Very few people, including so called experts, understand the entire system any more, compared to like a century ago. And related, our informational exchange is surpassing our organizational capacity.

[@steelwarrior105]

That is an interesting take, would you say that scales with the field size, like is it moreso in big fields like mechanical for example vs a small field like biosystems or metallurgy? Being a metallurgist most good college professors in the field are former industry types, like a 70/30 split

[@pmberkeley]

@@steelwarrior105 it might not be as much of an issue in a field like that, but the issue isn't so much field size as the reach and depth of technology generating products and concepts beyond the common ability to understand them. When I was in undergrad, my thermo professor's exams were all on file in the library going back to the start of his career. Because they didn't have graphing calculators back then (now about 50 years ago), the exams were about demonstrating basic knowledge of the field. In my day in school, we did have graphing calculators, so we could be expected to solve complex problems on the exams. And then when I taught the same subject, students were looking up homework solutions on the internet and often just memorized a basic approach instead of learning how to do the problems. The people who move on in these fields don't necessarily really understand how the field works anymore, the technology involved gives a veneer of understanding that isn't actually necessarily there. The internet does this, computers/programming does this, accumulating scientific research does this. We are a society operating on TMI and too much tech. We need to dig down into how to get people to truly understand core topics, how to organize and synthesize the enormous amounts of information we've generated over the past century or so. I think it's certainly humanly possible to do this, the trick is for us to start doing it. A good first step would be to take the education of students as seriously as the generation of scientific break throughs. This is a huge challenge because the humanities and social sciences hold the keys to that, and the physical sciences rarely comingle with those areas of study.

[@SoloRenegade]

@@pmberkeley Part of the problem is poor education and perception. I teach engineering students how to overcome this often, and I give many real world examples. I use the lessons I teach every day in my job designing the most powerful computers on earth. Yes, some things are very complex, but it depends upon how you approach it as well.

[@pmberkeley]

@@SoloRenegade I've known a lot of electrical engineers and computer scientists, and many of them have no idea what mechanical engineers learn or how it can help their computer or electrical designs. For example, the state of 3D printers is stunted by the fact that they're mostly designed by electrical engineers/CS people, who have poor knowledge of how to heat the bed evenly for proper adhesion and programmers of the printing path don't design for optimal material strength. My point stands. You don't know what you don't know, and neither do your students. Our technology is sufficiently complex that the entire education system needs to be retooled lest we increasingly develop below our actual knowledge base. A major limiting factor in this is how few engineers, for example, understand pedagogy or engage in the philosophy of science.

[@SoloRenegade]

@@pmberkeley WTF are you accusing me of? you have no idea what I do and don't know. Don't blame me for your personal failures, nor the failures of other engineers. Just because you don't get it, doesn't mean Nobody does. It's not your fault you received a poor education on this issue, most engineers and engineering students are being give a poor education on it. But you have No idea what my argument is, no ideas what I do/don't know, and so you have NO basis for coming after me and making accusations against me. You are bitter and you seem to want to blame everyone else rather than take some ownership of your life. If others didn't teach you properly, then seek out those like me who can help (not that I'm keen on helping you now at this point), or self-learn on your own and figure it out. If you're an engineer, then prove it by figuring it out and coming up with a solution, as I did!

[@ThisAutomaton]

3:10 Wow, right out of the gate a mind blower - I had never considered this angle about long term sexual relationship without children.

[@Arturo_Zepe]

No homo, but Geoffrey Miller changed my life, I’m from Mexico and I translate some of his ideas to Spanish and I taught to my friends and family and they are fascinated.

[@MasalaMan]

59:15 When you put yourself in the shoes of a woman it almost feels natural to want a man who is ideally assertive, kind, financially stable, fit, healthy, good looking, tall, big, strong - all these things that generally the manosphere doesn't seem to realize. I also keep thinking about if I were to get a daughter, I would be on her case constantly about getting a man who is pretty much most of these traits. (obviously stressing some more than others)

[@Riprie]

Sounds kind of narcisistic. What if the guy is too assertive and makes your daughter into a submissive gangbang slut for the homeboys who she will eventually get her pregant and dump her on a sidewalk because she didn't take her birthcontrol pills?

[@milkoil]

Lol I know right. Manosphere guys are the left overs who couldn't overcome. Don't listen to them. They're delusional. No freaking way I'd want either of my two daughters to date bums like them. Sucks for them. But thats the game man.

[@our.secret1130]

Which more ?

[@motorbreath22]

That's all great, just don't expect Chad to stick around.. he has all the options, his genetics don't come for free.

[@szotakandrei]

@@torachan23 and also to not want one who is partying all the time, spends every weekend in clubs, has a social media feed filled with half naked pictures, has lip job and fake boobs done and so on

[@flynnmorrow6945]

Ha! My husband is always laughing at me when I'm angry about something stupid. It helps so much.

[@clint4004]

There's a turmoil with knowing the odds of ending up in probate court and losing income is a real turn off .

[@musictheorytree]

To your final points, Chris... I sense a strong likelihood that there are many people attempting to be THE exestential threat podcasters, but they are being sensored and we will likely never hear their cries. This was a great discussion, regardless.

[@agassicarlosdecx3860]

Dr. JOHN GRAY, would be the best guest regarding male and female relationships. He was the OG in this field and was married for 30 years till his wife passed on. And he was totally monogamous and was a Buddhist monk who abstained for years and is a zen master of meditation. And he had several kids with her and now several grandkids.

[@jaydamalley3398]

Is he the same one who wrote _The Boy Crisis_ with Warren Farrell?

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

If he was married for forever and a monk, what would he possibly know about female and male relationships?

[@dahliafiend]

@@wyleecoyotee4252 this type of question is addressed in the video here.

[@ryanb01]

Should have asked him about his poly lifestyle in regards to long term relationships

[@trackerbacker]

Don't hate the player OR the game. Just don't hate. Enjoy the gift that is life.

[@AW-wo2pm]

🚀 another brilliant podcast can’t wait for prt 2 on existential risk

[@cucuraki5913]

2:05 notice how chris is already ready to ask (or agree on the matter) another question, but hesitates and makes a move towards further discussion on the subject that had momentarily aroused an interest in him. that what makes a good interviewer. following the script, but gradually making your way to build up a normal conversation, which requires lots of self explanation to reach a common understanding for the participants and the viewers

[@danielepp3113]

Desmond Morris deserves at least a mention.

[@therearenoshortcuts9868]

talk about this topic: how intelligent species can go extinct because their dating strategies got too ridiculous LOL

[@MomoSimone22]

That's actually quite funny hahah

[@anneb889]

I think of Bill Burr when he says technology will just replace us. Sex dolls will become more and more human like…and people will prefer them to actual humans, and eventually we will go extinct.

[@osmanbey8796]

@@anneb889 If “we” means the West, then yes. The West will be demographically replaced by more marriage/family/population growth cultures and people. This isn’t actually any bit surprising. Just 800 years ago, the whole of North & South America was populated by completely different groups of people, now look? Heck, 1000 years ago the people who are the modern day Turks, were a bunch of Mongolian tribes wandering the Central Asian steppe, with East Asian features.

[@eheheh3263]

Many species have gone extinct and humans are not the exception...

[@therearenoshortcuts9868]

@@MomoSimone22 male bird: check out my wings female bird: i've seen bigger male bird: check out my colorful tail female bird: nah, i've seen better male bird: check out how fast i fly female bird: let me try throwing a rock - my rock is faster than you male bird: stfu female bird: misogynist

[@Toxic_0_]

Thanks Chris for really exploring the topics surrounding modern fertility and dating. Its a really important issue to bring to light. We're well and truly done if the current trend continues without intervention.

[@Sisterlisk]

I can't fathom attraction + not wanting to have babies with that person. People are so broken.

[@johnnyboyvan]

I don't admire anyone but myself. I enjoy listening to various perspectives and I don't limit my possibilities. I am open to evolve and dare I say it devolve.

[@simongotborg3866]

Wow! I'd never thought of the parallel between simp-shaming and slut-shaming before, but it seems quite obvious now that I think about it. Really interesting stuff. Thanks!

[@josephfelderhoff1965]

12:20 "where do undergrads go" mostly podcasts and recorded lectures. Jordan Peterson's 2017 personality course recordings, here, Brett Weinstein, Lex Fridman had a guest who talked about human evolution recently. Unfortunately I don't feel my peers and I have the wisdom to select who to listen to well. At a proper university we would have a team of older, vastly more educated adults to guide us. All I have now are youtubers/podcasters who are doing some mix of educating me out of generosity and harnessing my attention for financial gain. And an algorithm that only wants financial gain.

[@isee7668]

And they're trying to take all that away from you.

[@ndndndnnduwjqams]

I'm in very similar situation. I watch the same lectures and podcasts you mentioned, probably read similar books and I am 20 yo. But all my friends in real life aren't interested in these sort of things. Would you like to talk a bit about these topics? I really would like to have someone to talk about ev psych and those topics

[@Metro4466]

So many book recommendations in this episode, kind of overwhelmed when "You should read this" was mentioned 10 times. I can hardly read 6 books in a year

[@Tom-qo4mz]

did you note them down? been looking for a comment that did cos i didn't myself

[@Metro4466]

@@Tom-qo4mz no I didn't

[@kimberlywrobel]

Excellent conversation guys. Thanks for what you all do. ❤

[@ciaramaderia]

I’m 25 and the thought of having a child in this current state of the world is scary af

[@frol41]

Another great episode! 🙏 A small feedback would be to just quickly explain concepts that might require some prior knowledge very quickly. I listen as a podcast on the move and cannot always pause and Google. Thanks!

[@ovocow9512]

Only real ones know about Eben Pagan aka David DeAngelo. Respect to Mr. Miller.

[@stephennelson4954]

In regards to the dating apps. I disagree with Dr. Miller here as I feel like at one point in time dating apps were helpful, even useful. But that point in time was long ago. While I believe that an outright ban is untenable, a series of regulations around the construction of said apps that facilitate the creation of systems designed to limit the excesses of hypergamy and the Pareto principle should be done. Even if I and many others refuse to use these apps.

[@Macheako]

Nah dude. We shouldn’t HAVE a need for dating apps 😂😂😂 just go talk to a girl loo

[@benp4877]

Agreed.

[@heavenlydenied]

The dating apps are not going anywhere because the gynocentric social order wants them to be around. They benefit women and their need for hypergamy the most. If there are any changes made, it will be either to make the average guys pay more or shame the top 10% of the guys that stick it and quit it.

[@ΧαρηςΠανταζης-μ2φ]

well done brother,amazing podcast!!!we are much alike in the sense that i recently got out of the 'nightlife' and i started reading books and listening to podcasts to educate myself and you provide great content...lots of love and respect and keep doing what you do,and consider inviting neuroscientists and tal ben sahar or someone similar about positive pshychology its life changing material

[@big_red_machine3547]

X risk guy is Canadian Prepper on KZbin. He’s the very best channel on all of it

[@PhilHug1]

Chris, I recommend interviewing Isaac Arthur. He has a space and futurism KZbin channel that's far better than anything you'll find on TV or almost any other KZbin channel

[@LarsAndersenFrihed]

Who puts a plant on their printer? It's unnatural.

[@RyanH2198]

I was staring at that the whole time and it bothered me 😂

[@Angelenergy123]

Fantastic episode, Chris! Please invite Richard Grannon - he has a wealth of knowledge on so many different topics. Absolutely love your dedication

[@covid9299]

Oh yes I was waiting for an Interviem with an Evolutionary Psychologist for so long. Thank you Chris for making it hapen.

[@doh917]

A problem with a lot of these academics is that they are subject to social pressures that may restrict them from drawing some uncomfortable conclusions. If an academic does work but draws a very impolite or dangerous conclusion that may reveal something about the human condition, they will alter their conclusion because the reputation risk and/or career-social risk is too great. They are subject to ideological constraints that other people who do not fall under the rubric of "professional" or "academic" are not restrained by. Now, the question is whether that's a good thing which for many cases it is but those constraints and by virtue incomplete analysis remains nonetheless. It's applying a personal morality to science or observed behavior to guide a certain moralistic/value driven/ideological narrative versus simply presenting the case with the information and having people draw their own conclusions from the facts. That's whats observed by people who denigrate the guys who went out into their own lives and accumulated data on their own through trial and error and compiling data/information and compared notes in forums. People have a problem with this method because it does not take into account the ethical requirements of a "professional" or "academic" study but one could argue that that information actually presents a more raw data set because it is not constrained by institutional social pressures. The information may be uncomfortable but would people rather be happy or right? That is the ethical question which inevitably leads to things like the "noble lie". Unfortunately, intersexual dynamics in the internet exposure age with recorded data over a large sample size and time frame are revealing some pretty uncomfortable trends that are now making it near impossible to ignore and therefore confronting people to make decisions on how to react/respond.

[@ANARKOTEROR]

If the answer is obvious, who the hell has ever made a living by explaining the obvious?

[@Droselover-hu1gt]

Oh okay so I should consider the experiences by some random men over the academic studies by professional academics because there is academic pressure to ignore certain explanations. Got it.

[@Droselover-hu1gt]

You are just claiming that academics are forced to come to a certain conclusion via social pressure because their conclusion disagrees with your conclusion

[@Droselover-hu1gt]

The fact that you think that guys compiling data from their own experiences and comparing them in forums is just as credible as academics studying the particular topic because academics are forced to comply to a certain ideology is delusional.

[@doh917]

@@Droselover-hu1gt There are no difference between men and women because the certificate people tell me so and the screen people confirm it

[@ecstazyrm]

Great that he mentioned David deangelo!!!

[@madbowler6]

That was an awesome conversation. Well done Chris.

[@antfinn5003]

This was awesome. I really would love to see more intelligent people giving takes on the red pill and manosphere and general advice on how to navigate it.. There are a lot of ego investments and just lack of nuance on these topics which are really easy to get emotional about. However, on the other side, there just aren’t enough people talking about it at all for it to get the proper scrutiny it needs for there to be genuine insights from it. A lot of times the conversations will simply stop on step 1 and not go further, rather it will just be repeated over and over again.

[@barkwetmuhvondurton9275]

Your looking for exceptions to rule to hang onto instead of accepting the general truth. You’re trying to operate on possibilities not probabilities. Your argument seems emotional.

[@antfinn5003]

@@barkwetmuhvondurton9275 what do you think my argument is?

[@barkwetmuhvondurton9275]

@@antfinn5003 Usually when people say the RP lacks nuance they are saying because they are unable to accept the hard truths of the RP because if they did it would put their past decisions they’ve made in their love life in a negative light. Plus very little people are actually qualified to debate RP topics because to be able to debate RP you need to have the biological and psychological knowledge of intersexual dynamics and you also need A LOT of dating experience and success with women. Most of the detractors of the RP either only have one of those or none of them, hence why the RP seems crazy to them.

[@antfinn5003]

@@barkwetmuhvondurton9275 I didn’t say the RP was crazy, I said that there is a lack of nuance in the discussions around it. I agree, very few people are qualified to speak on it, and I think that those are the people who are mostly talking about it.

[@barkwetmuhvondurton9275]

@@antfinn5003 Well i could agree to an extent on the point about nuance but I still think the nuance it needs would be minor. Also when you say the people talking about aren’t qualified to talk about it I assume your talking about the most popular content creators like F&F and KS right?

[@nighty85]

Great episode, enjoyed listening to an interesting and level headed discussion. Keep up the good work!

[@kelper205]

The dads and grand dads didnt have a theoretical framework for how to find a mate. Maybe they had some instinct or unnamed skill, but they couldnt put words on why it worked for them. They had no internet for learning such things. Its hard to teach something you cannot express in words.

[@evanoliver68]

The feminist movement has had a big impact in this

[@dannywalker1326]

Why are you swearing so much? Your guest is so softly spoken and polite it's really incongruous.

[@tim3tRav3l3RR60]

Danny this is a year old but he's a grown man on his podcast. I hope you grew a little

[@irisleal263]

I've heard men make comments like "why pay for a whore when you can just buy a woman a drink and get laid."

[@AlecSks]

Based

[@mauinix4563]

You should have asked him about polyamory!

[@grantbartley483]

smoking pot made me start seeing human behaviour in an ev psych way in the eighties, so this current cultural movement is quite nostalgic for me, in a way. I thought, 'Why doesn't everybody see or admit this?' These days, I would supplement the leadings of instincts with the absolute freedom of thought or reason, which is not constrained to evolutionary selection dynamics, as instincts are.

[@flying-eagle-method]

This guy is low-key but a genius. I'm going to check out Mate and read it to my son(s). I learned from Doc Love about this stuff 18 years ago, but he's dead now, so it's great to find more people who really understand (and appreciate) what women want and share it in digestible ways. Also, 100% agree that a smart woman is worth more than gold.

[@cromecarl]

You should try to get Thomas Sowell on. That would be a great.

[@latinaalma1947]

g..yes the best variable to look for.That is what my mate says now. AFTER he has experienced decades of the benefits: interest in many of the same subjects, both avid readers...never feeling that the other person is ignoring you just because their nose is in a book 80% of their waking hours. Prefering each others company than groups of most other people. Never being at a loss for meaningful conversation. KNOWING how to invest for a future. Knowing how to maintain health into retirement age etc etc etc.

[@Thedreamqueentarot]

The hypergamy & bdsm aspect was fascinating. I’m loving this interview. I’m going to buy his book. 😊 evolutionary psychology is so interesting

[@hey_kudisco_podcast]

I can’t keep up with all the great book recommendations! Would really appreciate if you could kindly list the articles and books you cite for reference. Thank you.

[@whywhenwhere4377]

This was extremely eye opening and has encouraged me to read and learn more. Knowledge can be power. Power to understand at least why things are how they are.

[@TheyBenefit]

So as a diabetic 5'5 man that's mentally traumatized enough to be basically useless and fear closeness with others, my odds are good right? I don't mind resigning from the dating world anyway. It's been a huge waste of time, except for when someone is interested in the short term, and that's only when I was big due to hitting the gym everyday for hours, not something I can do anymore.

[@aliomar1975]

Great episode, again! Thanks!

[@itsmorgan10]

Damn Chris. This is a great one.

[@johnthehumanist2333]

00:30 REF yup,that's how CHOICE works.................

[@dedf15]

I feel like Chris' guest had an attack of old-people syndrome when he was talking about dating. Maybe I'm just too cynical, but if you are using dating apps to find a permanent partner, you will either overestimate the value of compatibility ratings, or underestimate the necessity of building a relationship offline. On the other hand, if you use a dating app for one night stands, you can be an amazing match for almost anyone for just a couple weeks before moving on to the next person. Also, again, perhaps too cynical, but I have heard of maybe 2 or 3 times when someone's ex gave a rational, dispassionate, well articulated list of points for the other person to improve upon for future dating prospects. In my experiences, and with many of my friends, breakups are emotional, based on many petty moments adding up over time as opposed to any particular "great sins", and not articulate at all.

[@meilatarzlo4627]

58:40 “ idiot thoughts from Miami “ 😂 can I guess F&F

[@mattanderson6672]

I've given up on Main stream media. All the best interviews are online

[@TR12365]

Why is Chris swearing so much? Geoffrey clearly didn't appreciate it which made it awkward.

[@danielogega]

This podcast is about to explode.

[@coldcreation6676]

What is fundamental in everything Is politics more correct then evolutionary psychology or evolutionary mechanism? First thing where now tell me how the hair should I skip so that my stamina doesn't do also quickly

[@jcb1728]

Here again. Super interesting conversation, and as a former student of anthropology and evolutionary psychology I've had the same questions and curiosity that you have. At roughly 1:23 your conversation heads into mollycoddling and male incel behavior, and I have a suspicion that the divide that's being created between men and women is also helping feed a cultural component of homosexual behavior - i.e. if a person who may already have a biological/chemical/cultural make-up that may place more central on a binary sexual continuum, I wonder if frustration in the dating market makes them more likely to find themselves lean towards their own sex for familiarity, acceptance, and ease. I also suspect it may well be fanning the flames of gender identity/transsexualism. I'm not saying this might be the case for all of these individuals, but again, those on the fence. I'd love to hear your thoughts. Cheers.

[@starstoryteller]

I would check this claim but I believe blue eyes help with seeing in the dark.

[@boredomaster]

Geofrey Miller was great on Alex Kaschuta’s podcast. It seems he’s always an excellent guest

[@MrTickleTrunk]

I wish Geoffrey didn't let his KZbin channel atrophy 2 years ago. I was really enjoying the videos he was putting up.

[@realitynow4342]

Before you started this segment, you should have defined the word: LOVE. People want to have sex with multiple partners. Do they still love the person they're with?

[@Aaarrrrggggghhhh]

Brilliant interview - in answer to the questions in the last section: How do you make ex-risk more passionately important (short of the first wave of massive pollution based natural disaster that is incontrovertible evidence of the beginning of human extinction)? Make it more sexy of course! If you're more likely to attract women because you understand that, and the result is your dating experiences have a higher chance of being successful, then that works, and if you do go on to pair bond, and your descendants might get to leave for another planet before the Sun goes Supernova, you've achieved True Alpha, then, mission accomplished. I think Chris could be the poster boy, or Earth's Got Talent show producer for this.

[@Basrawulf]

Geoffrey Miller, Love ure work. I actually learned somthing here.

[@ixco4732]

Great podcast. Need to read the mor al animal for sure

[@OkTxSheepLady]

Book recommendation: 52:30 “Testosterone supplements too high”, lol. 56:30. What a swiftly delivered punch. 1:28:01. Question: were they matched on Cupid before they met in person? If not, why not? 1:36:40 lol, if you see the risks ahead and say anything loudly, you’re called an alarmist and/or a conspiracy theorist and marked as a nut to be ignored. I’m sure there were a few who lived in Pompeii who might have mentioned that they didn’t think living next to a volcano was wise but who likes a doomsday voice?

[@humbledpi8227]

Brilliant

[@stroodlepup]

This is depressing. Thanks. :)

[@OkTxSheepLady]

Conspicuous consumption is useless for signaling “success and power” if it is not out of excess in your bank account. Something which puts a person in heavy debt or uses almost all their resources just shows they have poor judgment and little regard for their future. On the other hand, being too old to enjoy the resources you’ve saved isn’t good either. Striking the balance is an art and takes wisdom.

[@KnottyCeltic]

Desmond Morris (socio-biologist) is one of my favourite authors. He of course wrote "The Naked Ape" but some of his other books that are fitting with this particular podcast are: Body Talk The Human Sexes Gestures Patterns of Reproductive Behavior Intimate Behavior Manwatching Babywatching The Naked Woman Postures So many more but those are great, quick-read books related to this podcast.

[@au10666]

Damn Geoeferry is really nice to listen to! he knows his stuff

[@gregmoore167]

Eyes are expressive, and we are told pupils and their dilation is expressive, so having lighter iris could feasibly help in trust in societies! Just 1% more ability to see another's agitation in their pupils might have over time selected lighter pupils after just one person has a mutation in iris colour!

[@erikjonasson8585]

Great !

[@narjun1990]

I am so grateful to you for posting these interviews man! Hats off! Here is one person's life that you have changed permanently.

[@justStardust940]

You should have David Benetar on your show. Listen to his point of view. Nobody has been able to refute his views on antinatalism

[@ApolloVR6]

He wrote his book 22 years ago? Is there where Rollo Tomassi got his content?

[@gabrielbaillargeon8630]

Is there a place where you leave the sources of the data that you present. I would very like to read them. Thank you!

[@thejamesinator17]

I've followed evolutionary psychology for some time but when I listen to interviews like these, the field feels oddly similar to the 'god of the gaps' - always a convenient, rationalised explanation for why some behaviour 'makes sense' from an evolutionary perspective. Trouble is, just because something 'makes sense' doesn't make it true.

[@evanragland4930]

I agree. The statement that we all descended from Alpha males is so ominous it sounds ridiculous. Personally I know a lot of guys, that to put it as kindly as possible, contribute very little to the overall gene pool and have had multiple children (7+). Evolutionary psychology to me seems more theoretical than practical.

[@pretorious700]

Sounds like a lot of unsupportable nonsense to me. This type of circular thinking only happens in profoundly sick societies.

[@LordRykard9376]

Yeah I think a lot of the things said were absolutist and reductionist. I think a better approach would have been "evolutionary adapted behaviors are influential, but not the rule."

[@Hans_Peterson]

@@evanragland4930 homo sapians don’t have alpha males the way that other ape species like gorillas and chimps do. Some evolutionary biologist actually think this is because increases in sociability and cooperation enabled beta males to ban together and over throw any male that tried to become the alpha in a local tribe/community.

[@muresandani]

Not at all a "God of the gaps" thing, no one is starting from a conclusion and looking for a gap in our knowledge to say that proves their conclusion. Rather much of what is discussed here is hypothetical because it's impossible to prove the motivations behind an action, we can only speculate on them. Until/unless we can have brain scans precise enough to prove these ideas we're stuck with the most reasonable explanation is probably right.

[@kojsiusoaliu6772]

Empathy towards babies is the key to human success. I let you explain why ?!

[@migah139]

its not JUST short-term "mating" that goes to the top profiles. alot of these women end up having one or more kids with these "top men" and thereby excluding themselves from alot of the other men they might otherwise have formed long-term bonds with. single mothers are absolutely rampant on dating apps. even if you correct for the amount of those relationships ending because of the man, it really says alot about the judgement of those women. im 31. and im wondering about something that might sound familiar to most of the people who read this... "where are all the good women at". all in all its a mess. there's just no way to put the entire blame on either men OR women. but to bring up the long/short term argument in this way just seems outright inaccurate - at least seen from my perspective and those of my friends who are also using dating apps. with that said, loved the episode as always. keep up the good work!

[@CasaBonita1018]

Some good insights, some obvious ones, and some with the stereotypical evopsych problem of having a hammer and seeing everything as a nail. And I like evopsych 🤷‍♂️

[@ReeaInspiredWisdom]

Loved this interview!