An Exercise to Decrease Negative Self-Talk

[@spennny1000]

Brilliant, thanks from england 🇬🇧

[@nadjavale9230]

Yu presented me with a key point to understand why I am here in the world! This is not a smal feat. Thank you!!!!

[@tommymerelte4399]

"Mom how do you feel about my math score?" "I'm disappointed in you" "I can't permit you to feel that way"

[@tradslnd9872]

Wow I love your videos and haven’t even watched all of them. 4 minutes of pure therapeutic truth

[@denisegranberg4191]

This is hilarious and so incredibly effective! Thank you. I finally understand.

[@annettemckelvey4212]

I appreciate you Dr. Yapko. I wonder if you would ever consider doing some actual hypnosis videos on general topics here on KZbin. Twenty minute ones on general topics. I admire your work greatly.

[@DeepMindfulness]

This seems like an interesting thought experiment but a really weird exercise in reality. I can imagine having them say it in their mind but, it seems like a recipe for a really crummy interpersonal interaction. Especially for someone who has a lot of negative self talk. I agree with the other comment that in a FS the negative south talk would be seen as a protector and validated four protecting the vulnerability. This seems like a formula to help someone thoroughly judge and feel very negative about the negative self talk part. It’s like creating social pressure to creat external AND internal judgment of the protective, judging part. That kind of disavowal comes at a high price! If anyone is reading this, I totally get that self judging part of you. It sounds like it has a really smart strategy to keep you safe! Of course, it’s causing some real harm, but, I still appreciate how hard it’s worked for so long!! And, I want that part of you to know that there is a possibility it can be free of all that work, and you’ll still be safe! Really possible!

[@kat93]

Thank you for writing this. I needed to read that. Thank you.

[@PrettyFinessa]

This is sad, your own negative self disposition has an impact on your pov here. I pray that your thoughts eventually align with the positivity ❤ seems awfully stressful that you’d have such pessimistic & negative thoughts towards an exercise literally meant for you to UNLEARN the results of depression.

[@SugarBunny207]

Thanks so much for this tip. This has been my exact situation for the past whole year! Then my next question is, what should I say when someone praises me? If I say thank you it feels as if I’m agreeing with it. But I don’t so can I make peace with that while maintaining politeness to others?

[@lunkerjunkie]

rejection internalized

[@vaiciciaku]

This is genious

[@620annika]

Does this also apply to when people criticise you. Eg “my parents think x about me.” Does that mean I can tell myself to accept what they think and not let other people’s opinions define me. If yes, why do I still get triggered by my parent’s thoughts and opinions about me?

[@farihazahra4796]

Realize that what they're saying is just their opinion, not facts, you don't have to believe it. The reason sometimes we get triggered is because we deep down believe their opinions and it makes us sad. And I mean its not even our fault especially at a young age when you're only learning about yourself and the world around you if we hear something enough we start to believe it (this is actually called the illusory truth effect). But again I would suggest you work on your self-esteem and rely only on yourself for validation. Best of luck!

[@Anlonn]

to answer your question. you get triggered because at the unconscious level you agree with them. (and you get upset) You didn't integrate that thing as part of you. Let's say my parents call me stupid or whatever word, if i accept and embrace my stupidity as part of me, (from time to time i'm acting stupid), then no trigger will be there. Whatever i reject in me, will be my trigger. I accept i am or i act stupid sometimes, but that does Not Defines me.

[@titteryenot1136]

probably cause its true what they say

[@annastone5624]

@Annika I see it differently from the other posters. I think it’s triggering because deep down you sense it’s NOT TRUE and feel upset at the criticisms for that reason. Or if there’s truth in them you know the criticism is being delivered in an unkind and unfair way that says more about the critics than you.,

[@richardhanssen672]

But what does accepting it mean. Because if someone gets angry at you for hurting there feelings while I did not mean to insult them then I have to talk to them about why they are mad right. Because it is unacceptable to me when people react agressive/angry while there were no bad intentions. But I agree that you have to take there feeling seriously though. But it feels so difficult for me to say sorry I I hurt your feelings while in most peoples pov there is no reason for it to be interpreted in a hurtful manner

[@petea2485]

Wow 👌 👏

[@heartandmindovercome3214]

Genius

[@1TheShawnster]

So, almost a year later, I arrive and have an immediate thought that I expected would have already been covered in the comments. What about people who have dealt with several, or even just one, people who have said many positive things about them, then years later invalidates everything previously said? I know my answer, but I want to see what others think without clouding the responses with my perspective.

[@tcbell3694]

By my experience I'd say the ppl who invalidate what has been said,maybe have taken it all back,most likely are just plain petty individuals! It might be an attempt to hurt someone they once praised (whatever the reason may be.) Especially if they are aware of one's insecurities/challenges/struggles. If I had to go with an 'explanation', I would go with pettiness.

[@CatLadyKorea]

How should we take other people's negative remarks on us?

[@citytrees1752]

My concern exactly. This exercise doesn't work.

[@user-rw8zj1td9v]

Accept it. However, don't find your worth in others opinions..good or bad.

[@Sad_Bumper_Sticker]

Thought provoking

[@ISBE91]

I can accept them saying X or Y but without a valid conclusion or most of the time without any conclusion at all its nothing more just empty statement which means nothing to me

[@lorenacalderon9887]

alguien que me pueda mandar el video en español por favor😢

[@AG-mb7wl]

💫

[@azazaz14321]

What if someone thinks you are insane ?

[@Anlonn]

Who many times did you think about someone that he's insane? :) and after that you continue to eat your burger and moved on with your life.

[@MeelisMatt]

all the greatest ppl are insane :D

[@apacur]

😂

[@citytrees1752]

I find most of your other stuff helpful, but this isn't. It's not that I don't agree when someone says I've done something wonderful, it's that I believe they are just being kind. People say nice things to be kind, not because they are expressing their true feelings about me. And on flip side, if someone says I'm crap, am I supposed to accept that too? This exercise doesn't work.

[@MeelisMatt]

opinions are relative. don't mix objective truths(the night is dark, apples fall on ground) with someones insults. if you are bad at something, people who are worth something give constructive criticism. if you mean bullys then bullys are damaged people anyway they are conditioned to be compulsive and damaged and they can't fix themself so they lash out - it has nothing to do with you. have you ever met someone balanced and happy who is also bully to others?

[@antjetautkus5506]

2022 👍🤗