Dating Coach Reacts to THE BACHELORETTE | Greg + Katie

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‪@TheBachelorette_DanielleMurray‬
🤨 WHAT IS ANTHONY'S JOB? 🧐
Okay I get about 30 comments a day on this question. I'm a social and relationship coach. I've been doing this for 15+ years (since 2005).
I help men and women get into the relationships they've always wanted by becoming a better person and bringing out the real person on the inside.
You can find me at bars, clubs, parties, parks, and live events coaching my clients to meet and connect with people. The New York Times wrote an article about me-you can read it here: www.nytimes.co...
You may have seen me on TV or magazines on CNN, FOX, PIX, VICE, USA, and more, recognized for my work in dating, charm, and social development. ( • Reacting to My TV Appe... )
I'm humbled to have successfully transformed the lives of thousands of people over the years and am constantly finding new ways to make people better at starting relationships. If you're interested in long-term private coaching, set-up a time to chat at recenello.com/...
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220,000

[@pracowniaswiadomosci]

Wow. I was that girl. I was that person who was naturally happy with herself but I was also longing for a romantic fulfillment as something unexplicably higher. And I was very bad at seeing who was happy because of this prospect and who can be happy on their own. Now I can tell the difference and I do have a really good inner circle of friends, men and women, who make things that make them happy. I still believe in the immense benefit of joined lives but in order to amplify one another the pressure of neediness must be totally gone. Unconditionally be loving with oneself and one another and we bloom.

[@Jadedgems]

You’re so right. To build that network you have to be self assured and know yourself so you can Be authentically yourself

[@pracowniaswiadomosci]

@@Jadedgems well, we all can change in the process. I focus on gathering together people who support each other and can bring something good into each other's lives. Those connections are sustainable that way and I have the freedom to evolve. This means: I do feel I outgrow some current contacts and it doesn't really bother peolpe if I simply say honestly what I am up to and they don't resonate. I usually base this on activities and approach to life. And I openly say if I discover, for instance, that I need more prosperity-focused activities and conversations. That happened lately and quite surprisingly, most of my friends were into that. So basically, I introduced an element that wasn't a part of our social life, it wasn't my interest by far. And now it is, so I openly said I needed more of this and almost all of my immediate environment was enriched by this. My point is, I wouldn't wait to fully know my self. I would start to meet with people as I am right now and introduce changes. Some will resonate further, some will drift away and some new will appear. The authentic social life is more about common things, shared energy and passions and not eternal binding contracts or ongoing trauma healing.

[@JoyTb12345]

This is very inspiring to me. Thank you🤍

[@kenziep1025]

They broke up lmao

[@pixie3760]

I actually married a man like Greg. And to this day I don't actually believe he loved me. I was put on a pedestal and it was impossible to live up to the expectations he had of me. I tried really hard to make it work for 10 years, when I left him he was in a terrible state and went into therapy. Long story short after 15 years he finally dated again I married again to the most wonderful man, he treated me like a queen, but also a human, not something you took off the shelf and paraded when needed. It was real life . Unfortunately he died but we had over 25 years of happiness. We did our own thing as we had different interests but we gave each other the space to be ourselves , in saying that we were extremely happy and close.

[@lalalalaaAa123]

This is such a beautiful story, it really shows that it’s never too late to find your fit of a person, even after 10 years of someone else! ❤️

[@pixie3760]

@@lalalalaaAa123 absolutely 💜

[@ryleighelisabeth8808]

“something’s giving me.. depression vibes” LOLL

[@saucyseleners6143]

It's so weird to see these clips again and just notice all the red flags from the get go. Bachelorette/Bachelor became a guilty pleasure for me during this pandemic. Mainly because it's fun to laugh at and pick out the warning signs. Your first instincts are so spot on too, freakin love it.

[@gemandm]

Greg has a very black and white view of relationships, this strict view made him act like a teenager, a licensed psychologist did an in-depth breakdown of their argument, was very interesting. Totally recommend watching Dr. Honda, Psychology in Seattle.

[@5954ldydi]

Ooh thanks for that info.

[@chocolatecat198]

Yes! I love the Dr Honda reactions to their relationship as well

[@zarahshabs7936]

THIS IS SO IMPORTANT I LOVE THIS DISCUSSION So many people need to learn what healthy love is

[@lisah8438]

Thank you for your insight. It is sad to see the bachelorette fanpage on facebook comments saying that Katie is a the bad guy in all of this. I am not saying Greg is the bad guy but he has a lot to learn. Katie see is confident and know what she wants I think.

[@alirae3663]

I’m sorry, but the second he said “she just fills this hole in my heart” RED FLAG RED FLAG

[@elizehauptfleisch8233]

I cannot believe here is still people defending Gregg. Just show you how society is.

[@harrylederman1679]

22 mins '' this is not love this is need.... Loving is selfless '' so glad you said is about these two.-.. The debate rages about the dynamics between these two and I think you nailed it at about 22 minutes onwards

[@lalalalaaAa123]

Yep, I sensed the same things early on. That’s why I was so confused when people thought Greg would be the one- including Katie! This guy needs some time to come into himself before he should be trying to date ANYBODY. He’s not ready, and he’s projecting onto her a million times per second…

[@mykidsaresupercute]

This is the best analysis I've seen on the Katie/Greg situation. I've watched all the psychologists give there analysis (I'm also a psychologist) and yours is superior. You hit the nail right on the head at every point and explained it well. I bet you're a fantastic dating coach. I would love to see your take on Blake and Katie, which I always felt was a much better connection than what she had with Greg. People are saying Blake was the second choice and I totally disagree.

[@xxttiiffaannyyxx]

did you watch their talk about how they both lost their dads? I think that’s what brought them together more emotionally in the beginning

[@smh6788]

And the thing is as women we intuit this. You'll never feel fully secure with someone if you sense deep down their love is an illusion. And deep down dont respect that perspm or their judgement. And it turns to resentment honestly. And the old "nice guys finish last" THIS is a great example of why because its he wasn't so nice when he left her crying on the ground after dumping his fear and doubt on her lap and assassinating her character on national tv

[@juliank3534]

Wow that helped me to get over my crush so much

[@elizabethjulia20]

OMG YOUR SONG LOL. Ok also your way of reading people just astounds me every time wow, seeing you grasp onto things that I feel like most of us don't see until late - in real relationships, but also in terms of the timeline with Katie+Greg in the show. So interesting!!!

[@5954ldydi]

Greg is the PERFECT example why most people find TRUE love when they are not looking for it. NO EXPECTATIONS people.

[@joviejim3119]

I loved this analysis. Greg is a cutie, but he has major growing up to do. I know many people have said this, but please do an analysis on Blake & Katie. Katie literally falls in love with Blake when he willing to be there no matter what she tells him.

[@szymstone1173]

"From my perspective I deserve..." NICE GUY ALERT

[@andreaashfordd]

THANK YOU!!!! THE INTERNET NEEDED THIS!!! SPOT. FREAKING. ON.

[@MathPiHanan]

Would you please react to Katie and Blake’s story (considering they got engaged)? They’re so cute together, I want to know what they’ve done right

[@AnthonyRecenello]

If this vid gets enough likes!

[@MathPiHanan]

@@AnthonyRecenello 👍

[@watching79]

I really hope you make a video about them! I def liked this video!

[@kalyasaify]

@@AnthonyRecenello of course it does lol

[@jonsnow855]

LOL

[@hunterhappersett5872]

I’ve seen the season before this so when you made that prediction off the first meeting it validated to me how legit you are at understanding human interaction lol. You’re awesome 👏❤️

[@UrMy_GagReflex]

I thought the very same thing! Idk people who read others this way and communicate what they think/feel/predict about them so confidently, honestly and unapologetically. I feel like I’m the Anthony in my social circles….

[@alirae3663]

In reality, as much as I’d love to see your analysis of Katie and Blake, I feel like your explanations of what love is, shows why. Katie literally tells Blake that she was emotionally stressed by 2 guys leaving and he still just accepted it and showed how HE still loves her.

[@lovevideos1699]

I'm 6:12 in to your video, and you are SPOT ON. I watched the Bachelorette, and could not believe what was happening with this guy. But the weird thing is, during the live show at the end, fans turned on her and took his side, which I cannot understand why...this guy was awful to her and had every right to stand up for herself and go off on him. He deserved that. I was hoping you would react to their reunion at the live show.

[@srslyfinnick]

nooo anthony we need this video now! i can’t wait a whole ‘nother DAY 😭

[@cleovintora59]

Katie is such smart strong confident women she needs a confident strong man ...she had to emotionally be there for him all the time it's like she can't have bad day

[@mykidsaresupercute]

Yup, and she found that emotionally strong, mature guy in Blake.

[@katieuraski7756]

this vid needs so many more views!! you really did do a great job. Thanks for breaking it all down.

[@cassipy]

i agree with everything you said. you should react to her and blake! (the guy she ended up with) i think they’re so great together

[@gabirochin6437]

This is my favorite video that you’ve ever done probably!! It’s so funny & also just so glad you’re shedding light on this!! I don’t understand how so many people completely took his side during the finale. I agree with everything you said

[@elizabethjulia20]

I cannot stop laughing at how much your description of Greg sounds like a description of Damon Salvatore. 😂Yes *clap clap clap* you are fantastic dating coach. Giving the necessary reads and education.

[@KaitCervi]

This was so insightful. I've been watching your channel for something like this. You should do the same for Katie and Blake!

[@vanessavchannel]

Thank you for this video, Anthony! I met someone like Greg years ago, now I could finally recognise the behaviour and with your insights I could see what was wrong. I also believe I was a bit needy too in the past, which led to a lot of rejections, never understood why, until now. Thanks!

[@joescheffer4919]

I was kinda like Greg from 15-19, that man needs to sort out his attachment issues. Thats what I did.

[@watching79]

Love this video!! Please do one about Katie and Blake!

[@jazmynnv5831]

SO glad to see you covering this breakup. It's really so rich with lessons that can applied to our own relationships, unfortunately at Greg and Katie's expense. I think there's a lot here to analyze from so many different perspectives - psychological (their attachment styles, Greg as anxiously attached, Katie as avoidant), the effects of them being on this show that creates a power imbalance between The Bachelor/Bachelorette and an unhealthy environment for its participants, and of course your analysis, which is the way in which Greg failed to court her in their dating phase due to his lack of self-development. He should have taken your course before going on the show. More Bachelor/ette + Bachelor in Paradise content please!

[@AnthonyRecenello]

❤️

[@ChristianOne]

I don't think Katie is avoidant. I think she's a pretty good example of a secure attachment style.

[@Makeupmaniacx3]

I know it was a couple seasons ago but I’d love to see you react to Tayshia and Zac on the Bachelorette season 16! Such a genuine love to come out of bachelor nation

[@xxttiiffaannyyxx]

oky all of those vibes you pick up in the beginning were all literally describing me too!! It’s actually weird realizing how much mentally/ personality wise I have with Greg 😩😩 “needy/ jealous/ depression/ low self confidence/insecurity/ doesn’t believe in myself/ doesn’t love myself” sheeesh 🥴

[@andreascott8150]

Me too. Watching the show Greg reminded me so much of me that even when he spiraled I word for word understood him and knew exact moments where I did that. Watching this video made me realize I have a lot of work to do with myself.

[@LisaOrlandoOfficial]

Haha the Greg hair cut line lmao 🤣

[@minervaveliz]

Can’t wait to hear your take on their breakup. I think we can definitely learn a lot from it.

[@Lovelyliv007]

I just started watching the bachelor franchise and omg all these people need some therapy. You’re spot on in your analysis, I’ve met so many guys like him. They get labeled as narcissists but really it’s delusion and an inability to view their partner as a person versus deliberately trying to trick them. As soon as the illusion is shattered they leave super fast. Love bombing straight to discard.

[@haleyallen7892]

It would be awesome if you could react to Blake and Katie next to see how they differ from Greg and Katie!!

[@epipany3677]

The parts where you spoke like him were one of the funniest parts ever 🤣🤣

[@captivated388]

Is it just me or is the sound different? Anthony’s sound is much louder than the bachelorette footage. I haven’t noticed that on any of his other videos.

[@Joselle_b26]

The one dislike is Greg 😂

[@Mattice.Venken]

Great video! the personalised country music was a nice touch aswell 😂

[@cleovintora59]

He barley talked about her and asked her anything about her life and who she is as a person

[@ericxb]

dude you're awesome. I really respect the emotional balance and selfless love you promote, especially in this video. so glad I found your channel :)

[@AnthonyRecenello]

luv u

[@amandasmiles22]

we need more of anthony singing omg that made my day

[@abbylucy2813]

Oftentimes when someone is labeled "emotionally immature," there's a complex story behind why that is. I agree with your point that our society and entertainment industry push the belief that once someone finds their "soulmate," that is when they will feel fulfilled and happy. However, I don't think this is the primary reason why some people, like Greg, appear needy in relationships. Oftentimes this is a direct result of what they have experienced in their past, especially their childhood. For Greg, it sounds like he has unresolved trauma to work on. Before he is able to have a healthy relationship, he should probably work with a therapist or trained professional to confront his pain. Anyway, I think that in general, when someone is consistently emotionally immature in their relationships, it more strongly indicates the pain they have experienced in the past rather than a societal narrative.

[@Jadedgems]

True

[@brandyirisable]

Agreed. I myself am like this and working on it. Lots of pain that cannot be undone with a snap of a finger. Still dont excuse him for some of his stupidity, but also relate.

[@5954ldydi]

Absolutely. Hopefully Greg sought out a therapist after he left the show. Doubtful he will find the (lasting) true love he wants without healing himself first.

[@abbylucy2813]

@@brandyirisable Absolutely! And it’s experiences like what Greg went through that will hold him accountable for his actions and choices. Nonetheless, you, Greg, and those who have gone through similar past trauma, deserve patience and validation as you work through the pain. Having support is such an important part of the healing process. Wishing you all the best 💕

[@spencerreidfan101]

Yeah his whole vibe paints a picture of someone whose been down on their luck in terms of love and is just desperate for that kind of relationship his family has around him, he'll take any girl that will remotely fit into his fantasy (regardless of the fact if he even really likes them or the idea of them) and rushing through a lot of development and getting to know each other phase for the sake of fulfilling his fantasy of having a perfect relationship/family life. He feels like his already missing out and wants that life so bad that he doesn't realize that his tying his self-worth/confidence into getting a family. Also not realizing that his not allowing himself to genuinely make a connection with her because his just so obsessed with the fantasy that he believes she will fit in that he is maybe confusing that for love, I'm sure he must have liked her to some extent but the way he was on the show seemed almost manic and panicky type of connection and neediness that comes with obsessing over the idea of a person/what they could have provided vs. genuinely loving feeling.

[@spencerreidfan101]

Also I think we see that anger in coldness from him in the end because like you said he didn't get the coddling/validation that he wanted so it broke his script/fantasy that he had and he realized that she wasn't the person that he built her up to be in his head (cause no one can realistically live up to an ideal and he really didn't genuinely bother to get to know her past the idealized version) that he immediately lost his "love" because it wasn't really based on anything other than the fantasy anyways. Also thanks for like Coach King Anthony! Really loved your thoughts and breakdown on these types of unhealthy dynamics/ideas of love! Really great stuff!

[@imtrying9812]

Would you react to Tyler C and Hannah B? They were also on the Bachelorette and kinda one of the best couples ever

[@_reyna_love_]

Unless your happy being alone you won't be happy in a relationship. If you can't date yourself how do you expect others to want to date you.

[@vanessavaldivia7093]

I feel as if nothing would have made him stay because she was on her KNEES begging LMAO

[@catherinehughes2022]

anthony i love when you do your jokey lil singing interludes bc you have a pretty good voice!!!

[@user-pc8nz6yx4h]

i like the long episodes!! and it analyzed something different. best vid so far 😊

[@cleovintora59]

Yes!! Insecure needy and very co- dependent I even thought at the end covert narcissist...I used to be like him oh goodness🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️I realized it and now I'm staying single to figure myself out

[@ryenne8919]

I haven't watched the full season but I do recall Katie saying he reminded her of her ex, so I think that was her attraction to him. As for Greg, he gave me scammer. A little community actor tease who got a little farther than he wanted too...

[@GGelix]

Greg's a paid actor

[@lauranamelines9492]

I have those same problems as Greg does. I definitely see those patterns in myself and I need to learn how to love myself first before getting into another relationship. What are the steps for me to take to get out of that? Probably too much to say in a message. Btw, I love your videos!

[@lianalopez95]

can you react to bachelor in paradise episodes?!

[@creativelizt8165]

Omgggg yesss 🙌🏽

[@jennymeyer12]

Thanks for doing this video. Learned a lot! 😊

[@taylormademadness]

I really hope Greg isn’t the next Bachelor like everyone is predicting. I genuinely don’t think he is emotionally or mentally in place where he can put himself in that position

[@AnthonyRecenello]

At least it’d be entertaining but yes he would be hurting any woman he’d marry if he stays in this mental place.

[@biglooneytic]

it would be fun to watch though.

[@kasialawecki7538]

My very first gut reaction was, he is very sweet but kind of a mama‘s boy. Maybe that was the neediness you were talking about. Makes sense!

[@LisaOrlandoOfficial]

Hahah you gotta share just that country song lol 😂

[@LovedByYou]

Unpopular Opinion: GREG is not that cute at all!!

[@pcf3037]

One of my favorite vids for sure, learned a lot!

[@smh6788]

Do u notice the similarity between his moms response and Katie's. And that seemed to rev his neediness up and he projected it all on katie. No hate cos we've all been there but this is a great teaching video

[@watching79]

Wow already looked through Greg within the first minute!

[@julietteSoul]

The best analysis yet of this situation

[@boyanmarkov645]

Congratulations for this video! I don't know but I felt so relaxed watching your analyses about Greg and Katie. You talk about self-love and self-acceptance - something that "alpha" facade life and dating coaches never talk about. I learned a lot from this video! Being needy is something that many people have problem with. This guy Greg is going too far - he's not just needy, he's desperate! He embarrassed himself a lot in this show. If a person doesn't feel the same for you, you just move on. Having feelings is not a bad thing for itself. it becomes bad when you expect certain reaction from the other person just because you feel something. Of course he doesn't love her. He loves the idea for her and he wants someone to take care for him because he doesn't believe in himself. He even became pathetic when he started crying. He showed too many weaknesses which totally killed the attraction. There's only one thing I don't agree with you. When you judged him in the end that he left. This guy already embarrassed himself enough. There was nothing more to do but to leave. Of course it still doesn't correct the bad impression that he already made with his creepy behavior. The fact that he doesn't realize that he actually don't love Katie or every other women in his life before, shows that he's immature and he needs a lot of work on himself to grow. I want to thank you for this video because your point of view is objective. You are a wise man, Anthony! I think all of us (unfortunately) have been in similar situation. Not that much like Greg, but still on a certain level. This is a problem. People should learn to be fulfilled by themselves and then if it comes another person in your life - it's ok. If it doesn't come - it's still ok. What I learned and reclaimed in this video: 1 People should learn self-control. If you already have it - master it. 2 Don't expect a certain reaction from another person. If they don't want to be part of your life, it's ok. Just move on. It's not worth it. 3 If it happens to have feelings - try to make it that your happiness doesn't rely on that. Noone is irreplaceable! I have a question: Do you think that aloof and distant behavior can help for the attraction? Greetings!

[@ChristianOne]

I generally agree with you except the idea that I think NO ONE is replaceable. Everyone is unique and has innate value to be deeply appreciated. But I get that it is good to realize you can be compatible with more than one person to prevent you from overly attatching to just one person.

[@elizabethjulia20]

Ok I don't know if this is an out-there suggestion... but making a series of videos like this for different bachelorette couples as "case studies" could be SO interesting (to me lol). I know it might be a lot of work? But you could have people vote on standout bachelor/ette pairings to analyse?? I'm thinking of you reacting through Colton+Cassie for example, at the time a lot of people were critical of Cassie whereas I saw a lot of anxiety and miscommunication(kind of an out-of-show situation like Greg+Katie), or something like Hannah+Luke P where I would be legitimately interested on your ideas about filtering for toxicity and red flags. Your analysis and insight into behaviour(and aspects like charm, humour, expectations) in the context of relationships is just so interesting?

[@AnthonyRecenello]

Nice idea!

[@Saphiera270]

doher and blake! bc tbh when they first got together i really thought it was out fo desparation, but now?? idrk with them on social media and stuff

[@ZackGallieshaw4]

yea we need to see the bachelorette more fs

[@emanueli3858]

I wanna see an analysis of Connor B. and Katie. 🙃 I still don’t see how that didn’t work.

[@dimphoditlopo3620]

I don't think Katie was that attracted to Connor to a certain extent. They gave me friendship vibes! But his a great guy and deserves the best💯

[@mandyfrommars8789]

The physical chemistry was off with them

[@chempanda6388]

Greg was result focused like you said and that was his path to downfall.

[@ayomidedareabel5525]

My Ex was a Greg constantly needing attention from me or from everyone infact and he used to complain that I wasn't as vulnerable as he was with me well that was because I have trust issues I don't even tell my parents things unless it's necessary. And I never felt he was mature enough for me to be vulnerable with but because I had a lot of low self esteem cause I believed that I was ugly I was never going to get a guy that loved me as much I tried to be there for him even going as far as skipping classes just to tend to his needs. But when I try to be with my friends he's like I don't care about him or listen to him. And then he goes to seek validation from other girls. The absolute last straw was when he was in a debate and they asked the audience for who wanted to counter his points and I playfully raised my hand but I wasn't picked. That day was honestly a very bad day for me and then when I went looking for him he was telling his friends that I don't care about him at all and I've never supported him. Granted I'm not the best at showing affection but the fact that he always misunderstood my intentions hurt a lot

[@janlycka9622]

Excellent video, loved it!

[@kalyasaify]

dude I love your singing voice, ya goooood ^^

[@josesantizo4432]

He’s a wreck

[@alizaloring3437]

How should someone react if they say I love/ like you to someone and the person doesn't feel the same way so that it shouldn't be awkward? Or the other way around

[@57andstillkicking]

You have a really good voice!

[@cleovintora59]

This is great video 👏🏽👏🏽 I was Greg, and than I grew up and dated a great it was so toxic !!! I wasted no time!!!

[@morganroberts1394]

I need help,my girlfriend has said she wants to speak to me about something very important,and I'm nervous I don't know what it could be

[@danibeautylove]

The random singing lmfao 🤣

[@boomshacalaca13]

This was fucking hilarious I loved it

[@ellamedic8963]

the guy us straight up annoying... drama queen!

[@chrissydatuin]

He's from the town over from me in jersey and we call it pork roll. I don't trust people who call it Taylor ham...

[@smh6788]

Nice. One ur best vids I think

[@Cookie20244]

You are the only real relationship expert

[@shaniadearmas9768]

will your country song be available on Spotify any time soon

[@yulnikita]

If youre rewatching 2:06 why pretend it's the first take ?

[@arielleolivia1164]

I'm from Jersey and it's PORK ROLL

[@Muffins775]

I know what's going on here........... Anthony HAS AN ONLINE FREE DATING CLASS!!!🕵️

[@AnthonyRecenello]

Lol

[@JoyTb12345]

He seems to be pressured to get with someone because his siblings have already started families too.

[@Makeupmaniacx3]

YES

[@sarahx7902]

‘😃😃😃we’re ganna shit in a bucket Greg 😀😀😀’

[@betty848]

Still don't get why she didn't just let him go and literally said everything (exept i love you) she could to make him stay, if she didn't wanted to be with him in the end (she said: he is her N0.1, it was always them, they are almost there and just have to stick it out, she leaves if he does, it is all for nothing if he leaves, she imagined marrying and having kids with him, she telling his mom they are the perfect match, telling kaitlyn that is the biggest heartbreak of her life...).

[@AnthonyRecenello]

Tv cameras likely

[@joviejim3119]

People need to remember that there are two things happening here. The bachelor/bachelorette is trying to find their person but also filming a show. All contestants have a contract and it’s kind of shitty for the lead (regardless of how they feel) to have people self select out because it fucks up the timeline of the show. I’m sure Katie was battling this as well.

[@ange-vanessaishimwe4153]

It would be very interesting if you would react to Tayshia and Zac from bachelorette 16. I feel like it's the polar opposite from these two.

[@stephonvalentino7020]

Can you review Noel Miller & Aleena ? They are such a beautiful couple & Noel is such a dope content creator 🔥

[@Jchilla]

This video is too funny💀💀💀