Jackie Hill Perry: Mending Wounds Caused by the Church | FULL EPISODE | Better Together TV

This week on Better Together, Jackie Hill Perry, Laurie Crouch, Dianna Nepstad, Holly Wagner, and Nona Jones discuss how to discern false teachings in bad churches.
Watch full episodes of Better Together weekdays at 1:30 pm ET on TBN or anytime on the Better Together website: bit.ly/3rflqve
Better Together is TBN’s first daily original program made by women for women! We discuss faith, family, friends and so much more-no topic is off limits. Find out what happens when real friends get together for real conversations!
Shop our merch! bit.ly/36cqGpg
#bettertogether #jackiehillperry #thechurch

[@BetterTogetherTV]

TBN's prayer line is open if you need someone to pray with you! www.tbn.org/prayer 💜

[@BlessyRB]

Jackie Hill is somethin else....the Lord has certainly blessed her with insight and the way she puts words is so scripture inspired.

[@lisangwenya8703]

These are the conversations we are supposed to be having as 'The Church' for us to be effective 👌🏾

[@sierraforever2954]

Thank you. I've had that "church hurt" I was hurt so bad when i came into the church i needed nothing else but to be loved. And it was nothing of that. Ive had to do it on my own. No family and nobody giving emotional or spiritual support. By reading the holy bible and listening to christian music. Its what gives me true comfort.

[@jenniferharden2258]

Stay the course sis. Our heavenly father sees and know you. All that concerns you is important to HIM. 💙💚

[@christelleilmet3601]

Well you’re loved by me and by God. And I’m sorry 💙

[@linkie9512]

🤗❤🤗

[@denicewilliamson8422]

I truly believe that all Pastors, everyone in leadership, needs to watch this. Church hurt is very real, and it can damage a person in worst way Spiritually .

[@iyanttahowellmd]

Also leaders being more humble/transparent about their own struggles (either bf or after their salvation experience) would be helpful in healing church hurt. Because a lot of leaders project this perfect image, vs. how the Bible instructs us to confess our faults one to another *in order that* we may be healed (James 5:16). The younger saints are having problems overcoming because the testimonies of the older saints are not being shared per Revelation 12:11.

[@glendamorrison5159]

Praise God for breaking down the difference between church hurt and accountability. ❤

[@jornadaminhalivre506]

Yes and amen! There must be more accountability! As Nona beautifully mentioned, we cannot fear those with greater influence no matter how wonderful their ministry is... We must hold our leaders accountable out of LOVE for them and the church of Jesus Christ.

[@AKchan88]

I think the basic problem with church is the idolatry of pastors and leaders. That's why we don't hold them accountable. That's why we somtimes are unable to realize the ungodliness in them. That's why most people get guided by men and not by the Holy Spirit. I truly believe everybody in a congregation holds the same reponsibility: to help everybody grow spiritually by getting closer to Christ. And we're not doing that. At least that's what I've observed from the few congregations I've visited and from observing my own congregation.

[@thelords3394]

The most dangerous church is the one they preach their spiritual encounters instead of the Gospel.

[@CHAMPIONS4CHRISTCHURCHATLANTA]

I'm grateful for pastors who lead with love and wisdom in serving the people of God.

[@CarolAvie]

Pastor of church spoke against racism on my birthday two years ago. I already knew there is an issue with that at predominantly Caucasian church to this day, I haven't and will not join. I was in Bible study class with one other lady of my race who had been there for many years. I noticed how she thought she had to prove herself to them at my expense. Christmas of 2021 one of women had Christmas party& I wasn't invited to. They spent time with one another outside of church but not with me. Time came where I didn't have car to get to church which is 11 miles from where I live. First time in my life that Ive had to deal with racism,because other races treated me better than my own. For years I lived that way. I brought topic up to other black friends of mine two weeks ago and they ignored it. There is one lady at church who goes out of her to kiss all black people on cheek. I saw her yesterday. I was sort of annoyed the first time she did that,but now I look for her. I only attend church twice a month now as not to be burden to lady who picks me up. She lives not too far from me. She was member of my former church and God put her back in my life. She saw my oldest son yesterday for first time in 21 years. Maybe God will use this to get me to love my own race more& them to love me.

[@savannahworth2495]

My parents are pastors and I have met the meanest people in my life while working at the church. I see how discouraging this can be for a new beleiver or someone who's been attending for a long time. The church needs to address this asap.

[@lacinda.bloomfield]

Thank you Beautiful Laurie for your word to Pastors- rarely if ever are there words of honor for all good Pastors who lay their lives down- and there are MANY AMAZING Pastors! ♥️

[@missmlb3842]

This is so rich!! Thank you for speaking so openly about a very difficult and covered up subject. So many times, some churches become about programs and agendas and people get lost in the mix as agendas and immature people try to lead never having experienced life as their congregation has...nor do they know how to even minister to their members, or people from different walks.

[@lindajohnson5782]

You all should write a book on Better together and put your testimonies in the book I feel like it will be a blessing to others and for the Glory of God

[@Yukia76]

I have been church hurt and I come to realize that I was putting pastors on a Pedestal Like they could do no wrong so when I start to notice things I was really hurt along with other things going on in the church

[@herinspiredlifepod]

I felt proud that Jackie was so eloquent in her delivery!

[@Hotteadrinker]

This !!! More of this . So many hurting .

[@preciousmdingi5321]

Church hurt I am a loner never had people who care or supportive in my life so when I found Jesus I thought and felt like I was part of a community like I belong somewhere little did I know it was a front by this I mean i was serving at church with other believers soon as I encounter problem I would look at my phone and realise theres no one to talk to I was hurt and confuse and when I had to stop going to church I realised no one even bother to call just to check how I was if am ohk then my life change I realise maybe I am born to be alone because even my family fail to be there for me but I didnt expect this from church I want to go back but part of me is reluctant and scared to expose myself then get hurt again😭

[@euniceawala1191]

Hope you find a better one You’re not alone on feeling alone

[@midnightmave]

I definitely needed this. My church leaders hurt me recently and I've been trying so hard not to let it affect my relationship with the Lord. But now every time I'm in my church, I feel really vulnerable and scrutinized. This helped.

[@thelords3394]

It happened to me a couple of weeks ago but I have been able to overcome it, by recognising the good acts this man of God has shown to me, it went to a point that he preached to throw shade at me on two Sunday's.

[@midnightmave]

@@thelords3394 I've felt they were throwing shade at me too! I've gone to a couple of different churches since then while visiting family and I don't get as much from their sermons so I'm going to tough it out. But I feel so uncomfortable right now.

[@ItsGabriellasTime]

@@midnightmave I'm really so sorry you're going through that! One thing I will add is never feel you are obligated to stay anywhere!! You know God wants us to go where celebrated (community-wise). Never forget WE are the church and have the opportunity to open our Bibles whenever ready. Finding Christ-minded community can be tough but all things are possible through prayer. God bless you on your journey, love !

[@jclilstar1973]

Amen. I went through church hurt from the first church that me and my children attended for 10 years. Its was very legalistic and controlling. After I left that church iv been looking for a home church and not giving up on God leading me to a body of believers where I can grow more with others. Also I have to thank God for the first church I attended because I was draw to Gods love in that church. I pray for the leaders and thank God for all hes allowed me to learn and unlearn from that church. My two adult now kids blame that church of why they dont want to go to church. I tell them man will fail you but God never will.

[@JesusLovesyou..1John3.6]

Only God is Perfect He helps us to do good because only He is truly Good

[@UnrivaledMIATTA]

I truly enjoyed this conversation! Well done ladies, more grace to you all. And Ms. Hill, you truly are a blessing. Every time you open your mouth it’s with wisdom and you’re soooo relatable.

[@JustTramayne]

Going through this right now! I came for a Godly perspective on how to deal. Leave or stay? This helps so much to listen to God's voice and let the Holy Spirit guide me through this. I love my family(church...and most of them my real family)....but I need to be healed from them.

[@patriot4amer]

Personal care counseling is so needed

[@patriot4amer]

Love of God is so healing and restorative...may the Lord bless the church with this awesome gift

[@KKthegoat394]

Fruitful and realistic Conversations Much needed..Thank you beautiful ladies for profound and insightful words of wisdom through the holy spirit.

[@MissEA2022]

I'm struggling with Church hurt.... my family got destroyed by Church hurt, it took along time for me to go back to Church at all, as soon as I did I witnessed another family go through Church hurt and abruptly leave the Church which bought back hurtful memories.... I changed Churches and am seeing yet more people get hurt in the Church environment, the leaders are very young and I think that's why they struggle to understand messy people who have lived through some rough times also as they themselves have not. I am also feeling unrest for other reasons and I can feel myself wanting to give up and fall away. It's hard to find a Church that doesn't feel more like a country club. The closest I've ever felt to Jesus was alone in Lockdown with my bible.

[@sheldonwilliams8595]

This is a needed topic. Ladies you did a great job explaining Church Hurt, and disappointment. Thank you. The church body need a healing, repentance and ask God and His children for forgiveness. Too much hurt and brokenness.

[@keenyah1218]

I needed to hear this; I don’t want to go back to my church but I still pay tithes. I have not joined another church I’ve been praying for direction.

[@Bublee1111]

Thank you for talking about this. It saved my life.

[@Salvation123..]

Thank you Ladies for these conversations ...I am in a season where hurt has been building up. The irony of the Church : It can be the place were you get hurt & yet still the place you get healing. I was just drowning in a season of confusion and so much hurt going on.Part of it was silly hurt 😊. Thank you ladies , I feel so encouraged with your conversations ❤

[@BlackandIndi]

Laurie has never "embarrassed God"! She's just soo precious and humble, yet open to the plight and trauma of others!

[@jeanene7]

Thats right. Alot of people dont bring it like this. Amen

[@shellymassey5794]

This conversation is 🔥🔥🔥 So glad they are willing to deal with the topic. So many times it’s one-sided. But I like the way they’re dealing with the era of pastors/leaders and also the era of the Saints of God. I live my life in The middle! And it’s good to see them deal with this issue across-the-board. Thanks ladies😃

[@Nou75]

Can we talk about it? I'm glad we are having these conversations

[@zuzilezungu5899]

God is Holy! Amen 🙏🏿 🙏🏿

[@toriAllisonP]

They said a mouthful! Such a much needed conversation!

[@daintytantan]

When the expectation is on a person, you're bound to end up disappointed. No matter the position, title or platform...if Jesus isn't the primary and ONLY person you look up to for leadership, you're in big trouble. We are the ekklesia of Christ - a family. We ALL have the same Holy Spirit dwelling on the inside of us. I think if we really got this, there would be no such thing as 'church hurt'.

[@jornadaminhalivre506]

I completely agree with your position especially for newer believers. As an older follower of Jesus, it's not the hope I have in people, but the silence and empowerment of Spiritual abusers through the lack of accountability that is my primary concern. So thankful accountability was mentioned as well in this video!

[@reneefaison5738]

That's a word. It is EXACTLY what I know Holy Spirit wants the people of God to understand and know without a doubt! AMEN!

[@anndivinechatroom]

This is so cereal coz having been raised in church we have experienced church hurt I know I have especially when my parents got a divorce yet they had been leaders we were all victimized including the kids despite the fact that we were also hearting from the divorce

[@ehannahlopez]

Beautiful words, I needed to hear this 💕 thank you all

[@antoinetterodriquez]

God bless you ladies this is well information needed because people get this mixed up about your feelings getting hurt let me run away n talk bad about them I’ve seen it all my life we’re going to always get our feelings hurt and get her feelings hurt in our own homes with our own husbands wives children friends and family part of life .... And we always got a remember just to take it to the throne no matter what we go through In chuch n home God bless you guys guys are on point with us 👌🏼✝️🙏🏻💯 luv ya All

[@angelamartin2336]

Accountability of leaders. Hurt feelings which cause division through gossip is not "church hurt" vs outright, intentional/unintentional sinful hurting of another is not Christlike

[@ericvance6946]

I have had church hurt and yes it hurt me in a way that I never thought or felt. Yet amongst the hurt that I experienced I trust God and I took it as a lesson from God and to learn from it. We are still the church and that God doesn’t need a building but needs us the people.

[@ErA-el1je]

Not "luck"....BUT...blesssed, directed, God's providence. Thank you ladies. God blesses me through your chats😍

[@Mona-Faye]

Dianna said “we’re not to be new beginners & new believers when we lead God’s people“. I think a new believer could have a much greater impact of showing & explaining who God is and His love to non-believers than some “long-term believers”.

[@lollian2782]

Our walk is a marathon, not a sprint. But every part of the family is valuable. New Christians are invigorating but HAVE to be discipled and become mature before stepping into leadership. Just as you wouldn't make your intern at work CEO.

[@lorihunsaker1810]

Amen. I just love you ladies. Thank you for that.

[@carriegarcia2392]

Love you, thank you ladies I pray to have some one in my life, that loves Jesus, 💔➕❤️ watching you help, more than words can say, God bless you all 💔➕❤️🙏🌹

[@Angela-pz1hq]

Same here Carrie, praying for you.

[@ezek7]

Beautiful sharing, please do this more.

[@corneliakloiber8858]

thank you Laurie for talking so good about pastors....that is rare these times

[@prycerobertson4695]

Love your show!

[@lollian2782]

I absolutely agree that discernment is key.

[@aliceriley1173]

Wow, love this! 💞 I'm listening and learning. God bless you women of God, continue to inspire, teach and encourage. Equipping the body of Christ. Thank you💞🇹🇹

[@rhodaparhams4944]

Beautiful.

[@ChakelW]

This is so beautiful and timely 🔥♥️

[@cristalroberts9962]

Deep hmmm dont put your trust in man.....God dont have grandchildren we are all his children 🙌🙌🙏🙏🙏

[@kellijasper5912]

Being able to trust those in the family of faith isn’t an unrealistic expectation. Too often those who are hurt are those who haven’t had the chance to mature and grow in their faith. With growth comes wisdom and with wisdom comes discernment. Those who intentionally violate trust and offend will be held accountable for their actions.

[@FavorsVoice]

This really blessed me

[@DanitaLynette]

Yes

[@querida1809]

That's the reason I stop going to the church, fake people and pastor. These people are deceitful. Never trust man, so true. However, I have never lost my faith. Thanks jJackie for your message.

[@christelleilmet3601]

I understand where you’re coming from but we as Christians need to go to Church (a physical one) we actually need fellowship and a community. Fellowship and community helps us grow

[@daphenebaines4702]

This is AMAZING!!!

[@lovenottheworld5723]

They peddle a personal relationship with God, but they won't tolerate you having one. What they say goes. In the Name of the Lord, they actively turn you away from the Lord.

[@oletheafelix5263]

Thank you for the apology.🙏🏾👍🏾💞

[@amc4750]

Amen!!

[@patriot4amer]

Allowing God to use the HUMAN..to bring HIS healing love to the hurting

[@patriot4amer]

Sermon on the mount by Jesus Christ should be a teaching in the church

[@carolbimbow222]

Think that I am in a spiritual warfare now tell me more about it

[@terria.mccurdy9190]

G.O.D.(The Unseen, The Holy Spirit & The Christ) r true... whn G.O.D. tells us to leave church or anything, it also occurs wth n G.O.D....we leave which evr way G.O.D. tells us-learning how to listen to th complete message of G.O.D....

[@Hephzibah_n_beulah]

There’s no need to minimize or explain what “church hurt” is. There’s no need to explain or differentiate church hurt. I think that’s the problem, there’s an automatic need to defend or explain away..and that is why serious egregious issues in the church are not being dealt with. We’re not defending GOD here or ourselves so please speak on uncomfortable topics boldly and stop trying to be obtuse and makes everything smell or look good. This was a much needed to discuss topic but someway it turned into a mushy topic that sideswiped the depth of hurt happening to desperate people in need of GOD and kindness that are being turned away from church

[@joshzillarex]

So true. I love the discussion but I started looking at them sideways when they tried to minimize and categorize church hurt by mentioning trivialities such as seating preferences. Church hurt is less often molestation and more frequently misuse of “Authority” and feelings of superiority.

[@michaelsherron7815]

Church hurt...

[@MultiTiffanyDenise]

The Quote Nona said is erroneous. To say That Yahusha the one the world calls Jesus did not come to save us from sin but from pain is dangerous. The passage in Matthew 1:21 says that “he (Jesus) will save his people from their sins”. People we can’t just listen to everyone l.

[@theresaavril8274]

After reading your comment, I actually went back to listen to Nona and what I heard her say was “I BELIEVE THAT GOD CAME NOT JUST TO SET US FREE FROM SIN BUT TO SET US FREE FROM PAIN”

[@kinitokaibai6361]

OMG what a huge disappointment! You know what though?, I would not like to be in their shoes on judgement day! Take comfort sister, God is our vindicator, & they will be judged. In the meantime...do yourself a HUGE favour & forgive, move on, they are not worth the stress, let go & let God... feeling your pain & past experiences... Blessings x

[@rebekah1362]

I'm sorry but, where is the Holy Spirit in all of this hurt? AS regarding leaders, I'm not talking about new initiates/disciples to the faith, they're babies after all. But seasoned saints of God, who are operating in the fullness of the Holy Spirit should have a measure of discernment (it's granted at the in-filling of the Holy Spirit. And as we grow closer to God, through prayer and fasting, study of the word and being in God's presence we develop more spiritual eyes. So why the surprise when someone comes out of a closet? Why did you remain uninformed spiritually? I often wonder when people make statements like this why the operation of the Holy Spirit was dimmed in their lives to the extent they were taken but surprise. There have been many, many times when the Holy Spirit gave me understanding of spirits operating in the church. Spiritual sensitivity is a real thing. Again, I can understand the young, the newly born in Christ. It takes time to develop that sensitivity. But if you've been in church for a long time, you've been in attendance and are in close fellowship with God, you'll know when a goat is near. You can actually smell sin - it stinks.