Bitlife but I am the worst pornstar ever

Bitlife but I am the worst pornstar ever. Honestly never expected it to go the way it did.
Twitch: / callmekevin
Twitter: / callmekevin1811
Instagram: / callmekevin1811
Second channel: / @donotcallmekevin
Stream Archive Channel: / @callmekevinstreamarch...
Editors:
Kippesoep001
FluffyroxGames
And myself :D
#CallMeKevin #Bitlife #Funny

[@MHF786]

I swear Kevin's mind just changes each day. Like one day he's killing everyone, then he's forgiving sins as a priest, and now... this.

[@johnjo3409]

Omg its here again kzbin.info/www/bejne/ql7Tl4uZeLySh7s . A

[@be1100]

🌈IMAGINATION🌈

[@hearmeout1767]

I mean, as a priest he was killing people too

[@pokerusfreak8194]

@YeaMan you cant even spell page right

[@warlordofbritannia]

So he's basically Norman Bates?

[@daniellaalino1544]

I cant believe Kevin's best life was a man named "Spanky Handy-Pimplebutt" What an absolute legend

[@KynMites]

With an adopted son named Willy Licker and a daughter named Sweaty Handy-Pimplebutt

[@unnameablename]

Pop Starr had a good life too

[@vetreas366]

@@unnameablename Pop Starr had the best life... and also died in a boating accident. Coincidence? I think not!

[@TheWikiFool]

I sense a new roommate for Jim and Turg ...

[@redmist6630]

shoulda given his son his wifes last name "willy handy"

[@immarissa]

I never thought this is where the bitlife series would take us.

[@IamaPERSON]

@ME we better get rid of it then

[@boodlenoodle871]

Kevins porn addiction is coming out

[@StayFrostee_]

@ME leave and never come back

[@Furiac.]

This is exactly where I thought the bitlife series would take us

[@RandomHQ433]

@YeaMan reported

[@hyomina]

Me: I’m a mature adult with refined tastes Also me: *laughing so hard I’m close to tears at ‘Willy Licker’*

[@hearmeout1767]

@@joshroehl6098 Why are there so many bot accounts on KZbin?

[@CatMuto]

It's the PERFECT name for a Pornstar actor's son, he should definitely follow his dad's... uh, footsteps.

[@FernStone]

Same , I'm still laughing ... ffs hahahah

[@dylannecros3636]

@@hearmeout1767 because KZbin doesn't give a shit. They'll ban someone for showing a but too much cleavage or someone bent over in tight pants, but not a bot literally advertising porn.

[@AriettaTheWild17]

@@dylannecros3636 I think it’s the bots that have a way to get new accounts, but let’s just not be idiots and only ignore/report not click links that aren’t exactly guaranteed to be free of malware and they’ll hopefully get the pointlessness in having these bots. Unless it’s actually ransomware and they’re making a lot of money of idiots 🙄

[@adrianorongan9961]

I feel like Kevin's solution to everything bad is to buy a boat of some kind

[@biscatt]

Or murder

[@00CuteDiePie00]

Then the boat usually ends up killing the person he's trying to help.

[@asmokun]

@@00CuteDiePie00 usually it's himself

[@KitsuNerezza]

Or going to the casino and doing crimes if he's feeling a bit mischievous

[@fullofwish]

Because out on the sea your problems can't find you. Unfortunately murderous speedboats can.

[@izzywasbusy]

"I've never tried it in bitlife." Kevin... Have you tried it in real life?

[@Belshazzaresque]

why do you think anna is so into him? and why he has so many clothes that say MMF...

[@iwatchvidswithmydog8107]

@@Belshazzaresque oh my god I will not forgot that now-

[@springwater6693]

*furious web sleuthing ensues*

[@VampiricFox37]

I thought the same thing when he specified "in bitlife".

[@Pierce1996h]

Someone is definitely trying to find out now though

[@pkdphantom9782]

Kevin is the only KZbinr I can consistently come back to without getting fatigued from his videos. Thank you for the quality content my guy.

[@kennyreams3311]

Couldn't agree more

[@mischiefthedegenerateratto7464]

@YeaMan the only funny thing about your channel is the fact you have 69 subs, learn to spell and try making actual content before bragging

[@brycevalenti222]

@@mischiefthedegenerateratto7464 he is joking at least I hope so

[@Shaqueefalot]

@YeaMan Spelled page wrong 😭

[@springwater6693]

his bitlife and sims videos are so off the rails they make me laugh every time even if i’m on a second rewatch. kevin’s brand of being incompetent and unhinged is so great

[@Johnnyafc]

His dad went from not being stiff to a stiff in a couple of minutes 👌🏻

[@daintyimp]

He was cured 😌

[@dhampir_days]

I hate the fact this had me absolutely WHEEZING

[@caimanaraujo479]

Just like himself

[@ilovedogsilovethem]

THIS COMMENT IS SO UNDERRATED ASLDFLAJKSDF

[@emrys7674]

“why is it hard to be healthy” nobody knows kevin

[@heavenlything]

fr takes way too much work to be healthy

[@anthonyf616]

All part of the system

[@lilblock3564]

Pretty simple answer really. Most people are lazy.

[@hazeltree7738]

@@lilblock3564 It's never really that simple

[@dylannecros3636]

@@lilblock3564 unfortunately it isn't as simple as a balanced diet and plenty of exercise. Life has a habit of saying "you know what, fuck you."

[@Jessica-vl6qe]

“I’ve never been a porn star… in BitLife” why the specification kevin?

[@MINECHEZ1]

I’m sure you’ve heard this a million times but thanks for all the high quality uploads Kevin. You’ve gotten me through hard times as well as provided a nice daily dose of serotonin

[@StayFrostee_]

@ME put in the nicest way possible, feck off...

[@CallMeConfused]

Couldn't have said it better myself ✌️

[@springwater6693]

if you want more daily serotonin boosts: do you watch joey graceffa’s vlogs? Even if you aren’t a fan of him (i’m very neutral), every time he adopts a pregnant animal i know i’m about to enjoy weeks of adorable animal content and i think it’s more potent than my antidepressants lmao

[@stare4539]

tru

[@HxneyBuns]

Kevin, in early November BitLife devs are releasing a game called DogLife, where you can live as a dog. Do what you must with this information,

[@springwater6693]

i’m so excited for that, he haaaas to play it

[@Spud_Farmer]

A replica of this video *as a dog*

[@springwater6693]

@@Spud_Farmer i’m so excited to see what insane things they will allow us to do as a dog, there better be a crime button still at least

[@MrDUneven]

Finally a game where Kevin can be a total bitch

[@JazKaz]

What the dog doin?

[@user-or1lu3ku3m]

What a fucking life that guy led. Though it always felt like something was off, he didn't have to escape from prison or even kill anyone

[@RiotforPeacePlz]

Well I mean if you ignore all the people he slept with....

[@renatagianotti]

@@joshroehl6098 your music sucks, man. Stop self-promoting

[@sophieunsolved]

That title was completely unexpected and also extremely on brand for Kevin at the same time

[@scottbaileymsc]

Of all the boats he could have gotten it had to be a “Tug” boat didn’t it…

[@shead3583]

Turg boat would be better 😆

[@daniellaalino1544]

@@shead3583 I was gonna say the same thing🤣

[@jordanpaige4001]

Not to mention what he named it but good thing there's a comma lol

[@alissageearr708]

Spanky on a "Tug" boat - 😙👌

[@sapphireblue4031]

@@shead3583 Don't bring Turg into this. He's way too innocent

[@nuclearchezburgr3857]

Kevin: doesn't immediately resort to crime and violence Also Kevin: "how is this going so well?"

[@yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461]

"Bitlife but I am the worst pornstar" The thigh I was most looking forward to was to see what Kevin would name this poor soul

[@IamaPERSON]

*Thigh guys Kevin and fries*

[@IamaPERSON]

@MEwe should get of it (you) then

[@ZephyrElf95]

@ME Stop shitposting about something that doesn't exist.

[@watermelonsugar4478]

Kevin trying to cure herpes when it’s literally incurable xD

[@Crazypixiness]

Tbf you can randomly cure it in the game as well as HIV via the witch doctor.

[@sickgurl138]

I've been able to cure it with witch doctor

[@friendlyplayer92]

@@sickgurl138 yea me too. Irl

[@Co2Fog]

Crime and porn and adopting/abandoning are the corner stones of an authentic Kevin BitLife experience

[@SnooLuna]

Really any bitlife experience to be honest

[@matthewdean143]

"How many pornography historians and porn set janitors do you need?" - Kevin, looking over his list of Bitlife characters

[@mslizzybell19]

We all know Kevin is using Bitlife to live out his true fantasy….and I’m ok with it

[@StayFrostee_]

@ME go away

[@wackybatman2027]

@ME Leave

[@RiderLeangle2]

There's nothing stopping him from changing his name to that and renaming the channel CallMeSpanky

[@mslizzybell19]

@@RiderLeangle2 I would follow that channel so hard 🤣👋

[@fromthethirdplanet]

Crime, casino & boats?

[@zsvntt]

Kevin: *actually tries to succeed in a game for once* Kevin: “Why is this going so well? They’re never going this well for me. 🧐🤔”

[@joethehoe66]

Kevin the type of guy to see a bruised apple and ask “who hurt you”

[@ravager6963]

Kevin the type of guy to do the finger guns every time he's asked for a photo

[@hirowinglessangel]

We need to cut a clip and take Kevin yelling "Go Spanky!" Out of context lol

[@T1Delta]

I never thought I’d see you in this Industry, can’t wait for the Johnny Sins collab!

[@WERTYUIO821]

Plot twist: He taught Johnny everything he knows.

[@StayFrostee_]

He has now lost 2 famous bit life characters to a speedboat crashing into his boat, with no one to help. Maybe it's time to stop buying boats...

[@lisa-hs5uv]

„I‘ve never tried this“ - cut to every bitlife character being a porn set janitor / historian

[@johnjo3409]

Omg its here again kzbin.info/www/bejne/ql7Tl4uZeLySh7s . A

[@Liviosaur.]

BitLife did not name a child Willy Licker I refuse to believe that 😂 but at the same time I believe it, they do give people weird names

[@alyssumbread]

in bitlife you can add your own characters (pick their gender & name) and they'll show up in game as friends, relatives, lawyers, etc. it could've been BitLife thougb

[@snowleopard9907]

Tht was deff kevins doing I liked your comment so we can start a rebellion

[@Liviosaur.]

@@snowleopard9907 I was kind of wondering if he did but I wish the game did it tbh 😂

[@Liviosaur.]

@@alyssumbread yea.. I know I wondered about that too lmao, it’s much funnier to think the game did it though

[@MiyukiErieAyashii]

As someone who has played hours and hours of bitlife... "Willy" as a first name and "Licker" as a last name are absolutely some of the random options, but I havent seen them paired together before lol. The coincidental names in bitlife are AMAZING, I've gotten other great ones too

[@fury1031]

As soon as he went to the casino, I knew it was a sign that it was all going to go downhill. Casinos, hook-ups, and running for office always ruin his characters' lives regardless of how successful they were beforehand.

[@bt7594]

Please tell me I'm not the only one that needs to hear Kevin sing the full grinch song. The little snippet sounded good to me and I want to hear a full version

[@BennyLlama39]

Kevin: "Why is this going so well? They *never* go this well for me." 😀 Me: And that's when your Spidey Senses should've gone off. 😒

[@sapphireblue4031]

Well, he's a porn actor, not Spiderman

[@benkidd4954]

“Never tried it in bitlife” What aren’t you telling us about your real life Kevin?

[@ludos1963]

He probably already tried it in the Sims tbf... And in real life too of course!

[@smellyfries1834]

This is like the 10th time someone crashed into one of Kevin's boats and killed his character.

[@Jason-tz7ir]

Wow... Spoilers

[@coffee-with-sprats]

Also thought about it.

[@landkonnudur]

@@Jason-tz7ir if you read the comments before you watch the video, you'd better believe it's your own fault if the video is spoiled for you

[@iamdingus]

You’d think Kevin would learn from all the boat-related fatalities he’s had that it’s probably not the best idea every time. Get a paddleboat next time. That one went well.

[@nightshadeLG63]

"Never tried it in Bitlife" Emphasis on the 'In Bitlife' Is there something you want to tell us, Kevin?

[@vetreas366]

That Willy kid who was up for adoption was either REALLY hated by his parents or... Nah, no contest, his parents must have really hated him.

[@fictional-girl_05]

The Dr. Grinch made me think- That would be a really fun Christmas challenge, being the Grinch in Bitlife. You could be like a super stingy person and do a bunch of like burglary but then turn it around.

[@anotherguy687]

>Kevin O’Reilly >Ever ceasing to be terrible High hopes there mate

[@urmother3255]

I feel like Spanky might have been the 8th dwarf Disney didn’t want anything to do with

[@nilufer6773]

2:21 The little gasp and pure joy of being a pornstar.. This made my day better

[@pedrostormrage]

5:54 "If they get married, he should probably take her name: Spanky Focker" Even better: Spanky Pimplebutt-Focker (which is a very specific "taste") 😂

[@bogeymanbear]

"hey there friends hows it going" is just the highlight of my day

[@johnjo3409]

Omg its here again kzbin.info/www/bejne/ql7Tl4uZeLySh7s W.

[@bogeymanbear]

@@joshroehl6098 there is absolutely no way youre advertising that

[@friendlyneighborhoodcrackh6059]

I like to imagine that when you left everything to “charity” that “Charity” is actually the name of one of spankys coworkers.

[@moreplease394]

Kevin: "I never tries this in bitlife." Me: "So he's done it irl?"

[@franklinnpotato1302]

0:07 "never tried it IN BITLIFE"

[@manologamerss5801]

The first part is how a bitLife SHOULD go, the last part is Kevin screwing his life up like every other bitLife.

[@IHeartGameplay]

"Yeah I'll be Spanky Handy-Pimplebutt" I am a 26-year-old woman, Kevin, who just cackled like a witch because of this in a room full of people. I can't even explain myself.

[@burk314]

Why does it seem like every time he ends up buying a boat in BitLife, Kevin immediately gets into a fatal boating accident?

[@williansiqueira8624]

"I've been practicing my spanish in Duolingo" Well Kevin, I thought you'd be practicing your spanish in fecking SPAIN

[@Rieszs]

"I don't care if I have to eat the grass" is going to stay with me forever

[@joelyt1682]

That Jim Pickens plushie/statue is just ominously looming over Kevin's shoulders like he's whispering something evil on Kevin's ears whenever he plays any game.

[@TilfordM]

5:40 I like the brief flash of "Your mother has been cured of cancer of the lung" as Kevin completely ignores it

[@Vyrion_Edits]

Lmao that made me crack (2 years later yup)

[@prodfuji]

He was truly humble. Regardless of his fame he still lived in a trailer park.

[@MountedDragoon]

I love how he called the boat "Suck on This, Willy" and then died in that very same boat. Way to stick it to your son.

[@connerrattray3512]

I’ve had quite the rough week but Kevin’s endless creativity and humour always bring a smile and laugh to my face!

[@Freakinger81]

I was playing as a Female P-Star once. They fired me when I got too old... why? Never heard of Gilf's? All i want to say is: I think they will always release you at a certain age, Herpes or not.

[@ElleyBrand]

I’m halfway through the video and everything is going so well - I’m filled with dread about why this video is titled the way it is…

[@monke6776]

This actually draws a lot of parallels to the real story of Johnny Sins

[@johnjo3409]

Omg its here again kzbin.info/www/bejne/ql7Tl4uZeLySh7s . W

[@monke6776]

@@johnjo3409 You know I have a playlist called “weird ******* ****” and I just added your video to it. I appreciate the link

[@hiddenleafdrip3869]

Which part exactly? I honestly only know him from the memes and the couple of enjoyable movies I've seen him star in, so all I know is that he's bald.

[@suavefresh49]

@@monke6776 what video is that? I'm curious but a bit scared to open it

[@poisonempress]

"why is it hard to be healthy?" truer words were never said Kevin (chronic illness + health = impossible it would seem)

[@jimpickensisourwayoflife2126]

Kevin's video uploads are the best thing of the day and seeing him make characters lives a living hell is always the icing on the cake

[@CelereMort]

"Your co-worker, Sean, wants to become your friend" So that's how they meet in another reality..

[@latenightnoelle]

14:29 he DIVORCED his wife because she didn’t like his boat, and the FIRST TIME he took it out on the water, it sunk and killed him 😭 JUSTICE FOR SPANKY

[@officialblimp]

14:05 thank you for being a comma supporter

[@JimmyHey]

Kev a tip for you in BitLife: If you're in a menu like the Job or Social Menu or whatever and you get reset to the main screen but wanna return to the Menu you were at there's an arrow that says "back" on the middle right side of the screen (like at 3:28) so you don't have to click through everything everytime. It saves you some time and also some sanity, I don't know if you're aware of that option.

[@Paulytoadzz]

I absolutely love Kevin playing BitLife!! Please Kevin keep coming up with these ideas that challenge the KZbin terms of service.

[@springwater6693]

i’ve rewatched all of kevin’s bitlife videos at least a couple times because they’re too funny and also o have 0 attention span and so much happens in 2 seconds so every time i rewatch it i get new content i just didn’t compute before 10/10

[@SJ-yu5zk]

This is honestly one of the most hilarious videos I’ve watched in nearly 4 years of watching Kevin, and there’s a high bar because Kevin is feckin hilarious Thanks for bringing such consistent amazing content!

[@wistinazz]

From Pop Star to Spanky Pimplebutt 😭 definitely Kevin Bitlife character development

[@zyphiro]

"I watched Call Me Kevin for the plot" - A very accurate youtube comment

[@Ray4938]

When i heard "Spanky Focker" at 5:57 I literally lost my shit lmao

[@katthefantastic]

"Suck on this, Willy" lost it!!!!

[@kazooturtle]

Day 136 of asking Kevin to play Disney Princess: Enchanted Journey.

[@MikasMeme]

I salute you

[@MikasMeme]

@YeaMan he dosnt even make music YOU DENSE M-

[@derreknight]

I will also vote for this. 😅

[@sexypickle123]

And a full playthrough, please

[@moneyhearts]

1:49 his accent is hella funny when he said he’ll eat the grass if he has to 😹

[@LeonEllisZ]

I just love how much fun he has! Truly brings me joy

[@need4speed5353]

3:02 me trying to balance work, school, and sports

[@yourpsychicfriendfredbear]

I was waiting for that one screaming clip Kevin definitely didn’t know the origin of when he used it in Planet Coaster

[@quentinmckeon4543]

imagine how many parents walked in the room and were like "What the f are you watching?!?!??!"

[@exlantic8250]

Love Kevin's bitlife content, never gets old

[@TrisTheAddict]

5:46 That’s legit my surname LMAO

[@chasegraham246]

"Why are diets so expensive, why is it so hard to be healthy?" I felt that deep in my love handles.

[@101falcon]

That instant karma at the end with the boat is just perfect 😂

[@notapplicable7621]

lmfao, bro what the hell. i expected you murdering people in games, starting cults but every single day your mind goes further than i expected. also, your titles might be being watched by the government. good to make sure you stress the BITLIFE ITS A GAME part there kev.

[@marcduhamel-guitar1985]

Pop and Spanky have been your best Bitlife characters yet. They should crossover into Call Me Kevin cinematic universe.

[@wyvernyx]

It's strange that so many characters Kevin makes just die on a vessel.

[@jaysontatum01]

I think Spanky Handy-Pimplebutt planned to die on that boat all along. Purposefully dying on a boat named "Suck on this, Willy" and leaving Willy with no inheritance is the biggest suck on this, Willy death he could've had. It all could've been avoided if Willy liked Puppy calendars...

[@Amymay-ql4wv]

I realise this is non of my business, but I'm a lil confused, Kevin moved to Spain, and is now visiting Ireland, but still has his old set up, up, does he still own the old place and now has two homes and is leaving stuff in Ireland for when he visits, or is it green screen? But where's he recording? Idk why this is puzzling me so much

[@MelonCuadradito]

I mean, Kevin is a big youtuber i'm sure he can afford having two houses.

[@Adrian-tm7nt]

i believe him and Anna have enough money to own two houses! specially if they aren't too big

[@Puggle-bot]

Been laughing from start to finish 😂 What a legend. Began a decline, and went out with a blaze of glory

[@connortobbell9394]

Good to see Kevin has a backup plan

[@johnjo3409]

Omg its here again kzbin.info/www/bejne/ql7Tl4uZeLySh7s A

[@ZephyrElf95]

I never thought I'd see the word 'pornstar' and 'Kevin' in the same phrase/title. The fanfiction will only get worse from here on out.

[@peppernwarming6226]

Day 857 of asking Kevin to play Legoland. The game is a rollercoaster tycoon but Lego. It was published in the year 2000

[@nickg6575]

You're probably never gonna get it

[@IchNachtLiebe]

I'm just glad it survived Y2K

[@pumpkineer_3047]

Omg dude

[@cooperpetersen2445]

Hopefully today will be the day

[@doctorsam9200]

And it absolutely sucked

[@coramonster]

"Why is it so expensive to be healthy?" America says hello.

[@MajorBaker-vz9go]

Facts

[@vonathan00]

Next video: “Living life like it’s BitLife”

[@johnjo3409]

Omg its here again kzbin.info/www/bejne/ql7Tl4uZeLySh7s . A

[@bellsroselps9548]

I thought kevin would learn by now that the coastguard never has saved any of his lives lmao

[@betterthannoone7636]

We’re all knew this video was coming, I just don’t think we were all ready for it.

[@Beisenterg]

"Suck on this,Willy" -Spanky Handy pimplebutt's boat

[@sunnex474]

Why does BitLife always give you the perfect book names?

[@yayazou7937]

ahh, I've been on a binge marathon with your previous BitLife vids, so talk about great timing!

[@Amayawolf_01]

The game realized what Kevin was doing and adjusted all the names to fit

[@casperthesociallyawkwardgh6811]

"You know what, I'll take it" best reaction to adoption ever

[@manwhatdoiputhere]

My dreams have came true now, thanks Kevin

[@johnjo3409]

Omg its here again kzbin.info/www/bejne/ql7Tl4uZeLySh7s A

[@SmartStart24]

Kevin not realizing there is no cure for Herpes irl either 😂