Catsitter Convicts Cheating Daddy (w/ Kelsey Darragh & Zach Noe Towers) | Perfect Person Ep. 34

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PERFECT PERSON
Perfect Person is a comedy call in advice show in which Webby-Award-Winning Podcast Producer, Miles Bonsignore, answers your phone calls, solves your problems, and helps you achieve maximum perfection with his talented friends.
MILES BONSIGNORE
Miles is an internet creator, comedian, and podcast producer, known for his work at The Try Guys (The TryPod), as a commentator on Pretty Much It, and on his followings on social media.
EDITOR
Rob Laltrello
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[@emilyf4178]

The first 10 mins felt like Miles was a millennial uncle talking to his two gen z niece and nephew and was trying so hard to maintain his patience and composure

[@Meganb1286]

omg you nailed it so true!

[@kimwalsh905]

OGs remember that Miles’ opening line is from a KZbin comment. I don’t remember who commented it but if you’re reading this comment I see you! 😂

[@94Tinkerbell94]

You I’m eee

[@mollywillo]

I know I was waiting for him to cite his source!

[@herb_rolls]

I recommend the second caller report the student who called her a MILF, that is sexual harassment. Also, Miles' advice was very good, teaching is about facilitating learning not being their friend. Being sexualized by teenage boys isn't the way that Kelsey described it, they aren't truly turned on by being mean to them. These kids just are misogynistic. It's also not true that boys only sexualize hot teachers, it sounds like the second caller is just trying to cope with this awful experience. They will sexualize and belittle any women, especially those in charge because they want to pick on people they deem worthy. When I looked very androgynous I was still talked about and I had to take those students aside and describe to them how inappropriate their comments are. Younger kids can usually learn but older kids with homelives you can't fix will sometimes be repeat offenders. Kids lash out at teachers because they are trying to assert control they don't have elsewhere.

[@abee906]

I really appreciated Zach and Miles taking the problem seriously!

[@JaedynCassidy14]

Hey! Second caller here, you got it spot on when you mentioned just trying to cope with the experience. I joke about it now but in the moment it was the worst feeling. I told the principal at the school and she essentially told me that I should have talked to him about how it made me feel, but I froze in the moment and walked away instead. His teacher and admin talked to him but I think that was about it. I appreciate the advice here and from Miles and guests :) I hope it doesn’t happen again but I feel better about how to handle it if it does!

[@dnkewlfe9043]

@@JaedynCassidy14 god I'm so sorry you were put in that position. I feel like a lot of misogyny is trending in full force with teen boys and teachers unfortunately are the ones forced to deal with the brunt of the abuse

[@brianasavage6790]

The gasps I guspt during this entire episode😮😭 it just kept getting better…or worse?😅

[@PerfectPerson]

GUSPT

[@JaedynCassidy14]

I’m caller #2 and I loved the advice for its good and its not so good (don’t think about students that way ew)!! I will continue to be more authoritative but NOT in a hot way 😤😤

[@jettybetty3173]

Love Zach's advice on dealing with the kid who called his teacher a milf to her face. He was sexualizing her and he should get in trouble for that because he thinks he can treat women like that and will continue to do so if nothing happens. He needs to learn that what he said was wrong and to stop sexualizing women. I hope that kids mother finds out what he said.

[@awakeinthedream1111]

Right on, that’s exactly how you handle it.

[@mythics102]

Literally thought it was perfect! Kids like this need the hammer to come down on them to learn

[@makenziegleason5737]

Same here, absolutely loved it! Teens have to be called out when they sexualize others and harass them, because otherwise they think they're untouchable and they could potentially carry that energy into adulthood. Actions have consequences, and just because sex isn't talked about in school, doesn't mean harassment doesn't have consequences.

[@jimmyoutlaw9384]

Absolutely living for miles’ “That’s enough.” at 50:50,, he will not be derailed for the 999th time this episode

[@MrDancingALPACA]

This may have been the worst advice ever and I loved every second of it

[@PerfectPerson]

We stan

[@zerocraic3966]

0:36 “wait are we supposed to start with an embarrassing fact?” THIS SHOW OH MY GOD PERFECT GUEST STREAK CONTINUES ❤ ZACH

[@julians4094]

I had to pause to laugh cry within the first minute, so effing good

[@zerocraic3966]

@@julians4094 I’ve rewatched the first 3 minutes of this podcast so many times. The authenticity and sheer hilarity of this trio is like an antidepressant

[@carolynmartin181]

Our cat is Waffles 😳 2 eyes though 😅

[@batayan1312]

I love the podcast, but if I found out that someone I just met was publicly speaking about me on the internet in the way that Kelsey talked about her new roommate in the beginning, I would be so uncomfortable... Maybe I'm just a prude, but man it rubs me the wrong way 😥

[@mollywillo]

I didn't even think of that but yeah it's a little sketchy... hopefully no one who heard this would know her and be able to link them? But yeah in principle it does seem a little objectifying. Hopefully no harm is done.

[@batayan1312]

@@mollywillo I hope so too :-( I could be missing some context or blowing things out of proportion, but imagining myself in her shoes creeped me out enough to turn off the episode...

[@makenziegleason5737]

I would agree, except I think Kelsey was mainly talking about how being a hot, successful creative was Kelsey's goal in life and that having this new roommate is going to cause her to work on her own confidence/self-esteem. All of the sexual stuff was just vamping and the assumption of Miles. Miles was joking, but Kelsey wasn't acting or speaking in a predatory way.

[@Kelsi96]

This is like if Mona Lisa and Jean Ralphio Sapperstein had a normal younger brother that has to babysit them sometimes.

[@jeanklurfeld1934]

kelsey really rubbed me the wrong way during the teacher question, she seemed to be like sexualizing the situation or seeing it as unavoidable? miles was right, it's about creating an environment of respect and using the power as a teacher to be taken seriously

[@angelita98gaby]

Yeah no offense to Kelsey, I know she is very positive when it comes to communicating about healthy sex, but she was kind of crossing the line here.

[@awakeinthedream1111]

Yeah but in all fairness to Kelsey the caller sexualized herself first and set the playful tone by suggesting it was because she was too hot as a teacher lol.

[@c9566]

Yeah Kelsey is the cringiest person who has social media fame. I’m here bc I just adore miles. She ruins everything for me. All of the try fam seem to genuinely love her so I’m sure she’s a wonderful friend and person in real life, but her social media personality is ick. “Let me be the loudest so I am heard” isn’t my kind of person.. *in my opinion* I totally get why others adore her

[@makenziegleason5737]

​@@c9566 You can't assume that Kelsey is being loud/sexual for attention. I'm a person who doesn't act like Kelsey but I have some similarities too her, and I truly get the vibe that she's just being authentic. Some people are just loud/hyper/sexual. It's not gross or predatory when they talk about it, it's a part of life. She's just being her fun self and not taking things too deeply, like every other comic. If you don't like that style of comedy that's fine, but sometimes when people don't like others who are loud or sexual it has more to do with how restricted their own lives are or their own insecurities. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed the other episodes!

[@makenziegleason5737]

​@@linn8370 I get that she talks about it often, but Garrick and Zach both talk about women/men being "bad" or "sexy", even children in movies from when they were children. All of them talk about sexuality and sexual stuff. Even Miles chose to have sexual content in this episode. I totally understand if you just don't like her vibes, but Garrick and Zach also participate in the sex talk and pretty much to the same extent. She is just a confident women, who has had different experiences than most and isn't going to hide her authentic self even if its different than the norm. Also, this comment isn't meant to be mean at all, I'm just trying to offer another point of view!

[@danielprasatyo9276]

I always enjoy every moment Miles trigger the motion sensor lamp by kicking .

[@GeorgiannaMiller5]

STDs are rampant among seniors

[@gracemoynahan3138]

This podcast is single-handedly getting me through college

[@Secrets4theMad]

same 😩

[@M-Joy]

I feel like those of us with chronic illnesses should get meal trains too

[@cassidybrewer]

For real

[@pentamerous5]

Kelsey and Zach made the episode totally chaotic. That was all terrible advice! :D

[@avakrista123]

no like both episodes with kelsey make me irrationally angry cause i disagree w literally every piece of advice and opinion she has lol

[@tawnyew]

Just hopped out of a freezing cold shower for my mental health and find this cherry on top

[@cyrilcherniak2128]

Deeply hilarious episode, don't get me wrong. But while the show has toed the line with boundaries/ethics before it's usually been playful in a different way. Personally don't like how a lot of this feels in terms of empathy for the callers and people involved. I can see Miles (and Zach) trying to break in with more considerate feedback. But I do hope they have a conversation about some things beforehand if she comes back again.

[@catlover4319]

Can you explain more what you meant by this?

[@brianasavage6790]

You know it’s a good one when you already listened to the audio only version on your commute this morning, but also excited to watch the entire video version the second it comes out, gotta see these reactions

[@geraldine645]

I'm sure this was mentioned before but maybe also have Matt as a guest!

[@briannat7653]

The callers didn't even have time to talk and answer questions. The guest was constantly talking over them and we didn't get to hear the actual problems.

[@alexare6655]

Literally every opening is something miles is eating lmao.

[@lorithomasscott349]

This is the best podcast on the internet and I’ll fight anyone that says otherwise.

[@ellises8612]

OK SO I’m obsessed with Zach. He’s hilarious 😂

[@anonymixx8106]

Another great way to describe shadow work is "shining a light on your blind spots!" It's the stuff that you know is there on some level but are basically wired to avoid looking at because it's scary. ❤️‍🔥

[@bakedslow2530]

I've never laughed and clapped so much in a perfect person episode to date!! 🤣 These 3 need to have a permanent podcast together 😂🤞🏼

[@cassidybrewer]

The very quick “no, he’s hot” at 6:52 TO A DAD 😂

[@SuperJamie98]

Saw Zach on Dropout TVs Game Changer recently. That's a fun little crossover I wasn't expecting.

[@TheSarahEllie01]

I'm glad you confirmed this because I saw his picture in the Thumbnail and I was like "...wait a minute"

[@lisali4000]

I'm worried about the first caller's situation. If the husband isn't cheating, then I have a feeling that the used condom left on the counter is him forcing his own sexual gratification/kink on the pet-sitter by putting her in a position where she's forced to physically handle his biohazard trash. The pet-sitter herself, who he clearly doesn't respect, may have just been forced to be the nonconsenting second party in his twisted kink. Augh. It's such a violation. The book might've been left there underneath as a way for him to say "it's me and it's not an accident." The husband is so gross. However she ends up handling it, I hope she never has to be alone with that man again. Edited to add that wrapping it in a napkin means she is forced to touch it before she knows what's inside, which is why I think it isn't an accident.

[@amandajunecesarano7423]

Or you could see it as the caller shouldn’t have been going through the owner’s belongings. The pet sitter isn’t a cleaner, they shouldn’t have been looking at their stuff.

[@fdlc0105]

This episode felt like when your kids and your friend brings a new friend over your house 😂😂😂

[@2948jdjdj]

Miles , perfect person is my favorite podcast bc it is the perfect balance of chaos and wholesomeness

[@ianlee4565]

47:36- Kelsey's definition of "pushing gently" could use some work. Her idea is NOT gentle!

[@emilyl1406]

Every episode is fire. The juicy gossip, the gasps, love it 😂

[@haleyg2251]

Best episode yet omg poor Waffles having people Jeff it in his good Christian home

[@jennad.1859]

I would watch anything the three of you collaborated on~* need more of this trio pls!

[@tirzah9929]

I love how Kelsey and Zach just, don't step up to the be real

[@PerfectPerson]

Hahahaha

[@PokhrajRoy.]

It’s nice to see Kelsey and Zach in an episode. I love them as hosts 👏🏽

[@jackl8025]

great episode as always (i haven't watched it yet but i'm extrapolating from existing data)

[@solamonotte]

I know Kelsey can be a little hit or miss but her response to the second caller makes me pretty uncomfortable. She didn’t know what advice to give so she chose to normalize inappropriate teacher-student relationships?? Seems like Miles was also uncomfortable without directly calling her out but I would also hope they talked off mic. Love the pod but I probably won’t watch the next time she joins.

[@rachelrosediary]

Agreed :(

[@c9566]

Zach helped a LOT here. I had to skip over the first 14 minutes to get to the calls to make it bearable. I always feel so mean that I feel this way but I’m seeing more I’m not alone

[@catlover4319]

@@c9566yeah she gives me like ned energy in a weird way just with the loudness and like pushing beyond when it was comfortable, but even ned was i think better at knowing what to keep to himself and not push kelsey just continually crosses the line in also just in terms of like common decency like yelling screaming for a long form medium isnt really at all enjoyable its just stressful for the listener

[@a_o011]

​@@catlover4319I have a feeling her personality comes from 1) living in FL people tend to be that way and 2) she's very open about her sexuality (no hate) and lives in LA. While I appreciate her honesty and openness about situations, she sometimes doesn't read the room. While I think she is fit to be on this specific pod, especially when talking about sexuality because she can give a different perspective or talk about her experiences, her coping mechanism being comedy may not be the best suited for it. She has a lot to offer, but in my opinion sex isn't her personality and could work on her delivery.

[@celestial_avatar88]

This was a trifecta. These three together is perfection!

[@EvitaGlez]

28 secs in and I hear shade and a big laugh? I’m at home.

[@sarahp-s921]

Fantastic episode and nice editing I know there was more chaos than this haha

[@earlesa]

Wow. This one was phenomenal. I NEED updates!

[@sarahmahar9043]

The hot Gen Z sub is my bestie!!! And yes she’s actually that hot

[@imbomi7845]

Hands down my favourite podcast these days!

[@KittenCece]

Kelsey is someone I both adore, envy, and kind of am totally intimidated by. She is so freaking cool & funny. So Miles, Kelsey, AND Zach? Oh, my God. Excellent.

[@floralvarezr]

I'm always glad I waited to watch the video version of the pod

[@TheNikolaiwolf]

The fact that Miles is only a year older than me is still shocking to me.

[@SilverSnow875]

It's always wild when Kelsey's on board! Love the pod! It was hilarious as always. Best part of any Wednesday is learning to be perfect from Miles!

[@jovanpegues9160]

One of the best episodes ever

[@kalexsadler3692]

Not to be a Debbie Downer, but Is there a legal team that the team has to run by the calls and responses? Kind of feels like, while ‘in jest,’ we are floating the advice of ext*rtion pretty freely. Very juicy, but it’s giving me anxiety thinking about the implications/complications.

[@whatthepandaboebanda]

I’m from the same area in fl as Kelsey and I can confirm it’s 10000% so common teachers sleeping with the students 🥴

[@Avara8888]

Omg Zach and Kelsey are so fucking hilarious I love confidently insecure 😁 and having them chat with sweet, sweet Miles is such a goofy treat 😁

[@hannahvanderkarr4710]

"I choke him, He punches me right in the taint" had me actually SCREAMING KELSEY!!🤣🤣🤣

[@lotus1186]

this is such a good podcast

[@savbloom]

Hilarious hot mess of an episode. NSFW but I've got my headphones in cry-laughing over here.

[@EvWuzhere]

Omg ALL DA GOATS

[@SparklingGlitterCookie]

I’m only 9 minutes in but omg this is fucking hilarious

[@shanyon_canyon]

I tried to hook up 2 of my friends for like 2 years then one of them finally came out as ace and I was just like "welp, nevermind I guess" hahaha

[@kaleidoscopic_star]

This episode had me rolling omg 🤣🤣🤣 that duo of Zach and Kelsey was liiiiiiit🔥🔥🔥😂😂😂❤️❤️ dead.

[@user-JessicaTaylor]

40:15

[@milla4898]

TRUUUUUUTH

[@user-JessicaTaylor]

@@milla4898 i know he was joking (mostly lmaoo) but it was so real I had to pause for a good while😭😭

[@milla4898]

@@user-JessicaTaylor haha same I was like “omg he actually said it” 😂😂

[@biancacolmenares620]

I thought we all decided to tell people when they were being cheated on. Solidarity and stuff?

[@itsme_taylorlee]

I think this is my favorite episode so far. Soooo chaotic in the best way possible. Miles is giving BDE, Big Daddy Energy. He is wrangling K & Z in and it is hilarious 🤣

[@itsme_taylorlee]

I just finished and I am rewatching NOW.

[@dylpickled]

20:00 Thank you omg old people can get STIs

[@ashleighmack9318]

I NEED THIS TRIO AGAIN BUT IK MILES WILL WAIT A MONTH

[@dreamyymoons]

One of the best episodes! EVERY episode is in my top 3 😘

[@borromorro]

Kelsey's "you can't be hot punishing" really spoke to me

[@ashleyholmes4221]

Kelsey AND zach?! Yessss

[@gamberlane]

Ok, this may be the best episode yet.

[@tiarizky7226]

29:00

[@ritajenniferveach6459]

Please donate the food to unhinged individuals. Please

[@jessicasussen3912]

Suggestion: what if you approached it like you are speaking to adults and have an honest moment "hey, I'm here to help get us through this class, I'm (whatever age) and I'm a person. I don't feel comfortable being reduced to my appearance. I have a lot to offer and though I'm not a full time staff member, I want to make this fun for us and get through the lesson plan as best we can."

[@GeorgiannaMiller5]

kelsey I live in Tucson and I am your soulmate

[@zerocraic3966]

Georgianna if you become the future mrs darragh-Miller, this comment better be screen capped on your save the date mailers please don’t let us down

[@Palpatine_33]

❤️❤️❤️

[@dylpickled]

31:17 why were the students getting kicked out for falling for predatory teachers?

[@EvMaddiePlusDaddy]

Very nice to know Kelsey is open to dating single daddies 😏

[@ten-hx2xi]

miles is a perfect person! you can jeff it into a c*ndom to prevent mess on other things! especially if youve got a trajectory to your swimmers!!like in bed! >:)!!!!! MILES NATION KING RECOGNIZED ❤

[@gopher8288]

For the pet sitter story, have we considered that the wife was cheating, and that maybe that's why she went on travel a week before the husband? Everyone is capable of some infidelity 😃

[@petalchild]

The condom showed up after the wife had already left though

[@LawlietxxLight]

kelsey u are devastatingly gorgeous .. coming from a gen z er

[@tinejoan]

ok but he's not 38 i'm sorry

[@lishciambrone6443]

Wow what a loud and self centered episode

[@josiee0874]

then why did you watch?

[@allstar14218]

Love Miles but I really can’t listen to this returning guest he has. I will wait for next episode!

[@rachelrosediary]

Agreed ... love Miles, but Kelsey is almost always a miss for me.

[@lishciambrone6443]

@@josiee0874 love miles! Wanted to give new person Zach a try!

[@missknisely]

I don't think it will ever get old to have Kelsey on as a guest -- that being said, it's a crime that she didn't share a photo of the mythical nordic model roommate

[@Strawb_Goblin]

That would be so creepy, I would hate to be spoken about the way Kelsey described her new roommate. It was so objectifying

[@rana3azouzpopeye]

I LOVE KALSEY hahaha