Trump Is Big Mad At Nikki Haley | White House Pharmacy Scandal | Many Loose Bolts Found On Planes

[@HelynnHeels]

"What kind of maniac pretends they won when they really lost?"

[@motherteresa9127]

Stacey abrams. Nikki haley. Every metropolitan mayor that proudly said they have a sanctuary city. 538 polling. This year is gonna hurt. Bad. And if you are an angry lefty, hold on. Not because of cheeto hitler, but because of the people telling you to be be angry at drumpf. And you will be angry, because you were told who to hate. And oh, how you will rage. Because you are empty without explicit direction for your beliefs and emotions. I dont love trump. But i love how it makes the people i despise angry, and then they tell you to be angry. Pathetic little pawns.

[@marilynm677]

Projection at it's finest

[@michaelbraun2462]

🤣😆🤣😅🤣😁

[@pocketrocket7090]

She congratulated Trump before her speech meaning she acknowledged his win which he’ll never do if he lost. She was surprised and delighted with the number of people who came out to vote for her. Typical Trump twisting it around and projecting as usual.

[@gojosgirl6487]

Oh the irony

[@StopWhining491]

Jon Stewart coming back is EXACTLY what we need right now. Yay, Jon!

[@user-wu1om1rw8t]

Wow - what a wonderful celebration of the Useless United States of United Failed States... When a state gives up on education, you get a shit hole like the Failed States. And lame hosts like Colbert = Failed States.

[@josiek5989]

I am a neurologist who examines and tests muscles all day, and I have never heard a joke about serratus anterior before! Told everyone at my clinic, and from this time forward, we will call them “rib abs”. Kudos to your writers! Laughing all day!

[@yudithcaron8053]

Those serratur anterior must be the muscles you didn't know you had after a workout where you ache all over.

[@Dharmarenee]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@user-wu1om1rw8t]

Wow - what a wonderful celebration of the Useless United States of United Failed States... When a state gives up on education, you get a shit hole like the Failed States. And lame hosts like Colbert = Failed States.

[@Flamenco1313]

“What kind of maniac pretends they won when they lost” 😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@BertrandRenaud-f1e]

Thumbs up to the writers!

[@Heilquelle]

Says Trump 😁😁😁

[@paulshriver1132]

Hillary, Stacy, Kerry

[@rafaelr5243]

@@paulshriver1132 Exactly, but people that watch this show have lost all critical thinking ability. It's sad reading the comments here. Result of public schools.

[@melissaweyrick5311]

Seeing the news about Jon today. 🎊🎉🎊 Made me very happy. I miss that Man!!💗

[@damionandy]

I know we're laughing, but this is also unfolding in real time in front of us. As a USMC Veteran and proud Patriot, I am worried about the future of our country if this continues. Since when is it okay for a grown man to talk and act like this? What example does this leave for the next generation of Americans? How do we not see the rise of autocracy? Our founding fathers are rolling in their graves.

[@awpetersen5909]

I know😢

[@robinsansing2642]

Thank you for your service and I totally agree with you. I think 45 is a horrible example for the children of our country. Let's all grow up to be rude, hateful, illiterate de generates! He certainly lower the standard of ethics and decorum in our country! I find it all very sad! Unfortunately, it seems most Americans don't care or get that the rest of the world is watching us. Creditability and accountability are gone!

[@Marcus_C51]

I quit laughing quite awhile ago, this is very serious. You are absolutely correct-thank you for your service and I know you are a true Patriot like I am. This disgrace of a human being should not be the President of this great country again. You and millions of others in the military fought for the freedoms that we hold dear. His followers don't even understand or appreciate that. They claim to be true Patriots but they fail to see they are not. The prevalent attitude he has of belligerent fear mongering and hate speech, with a total lack of decorum along with respect for the Flag, seems to have influenced people to act in a very poor way. Social media has been instrumental in this, allowing it grow and it is indeed worrying me as well. I see very clear parallels to what was happening in 1930's Germany. We have to make sure everyone votes this November! I'm disgusted that I thought we were through with him in 2020 but he continues on. Sheer insanity.

[@Marcus_C51]

@@robinsansing2642 I didn't reply to your post in mine (hadn't read yours yet) and want to say I completely agree with you. Yes, the whole world is watching us and are shaking their heads. Well said!

[@worldadventuretravel]

"Biden has started a new war in Yemen while backing a genocide in Gaza, both of which are fully supported by the party [Democrats] that supposedly opposes him, but by all means go ahead and spend the rest of the year fixating on the U.S. presidential campaign." - Caitlin Johnstone Yes, imagine being so privileged and out of touch that the entire world is currently indicting the Israeli terrorist regime for committing an actual holocaust and all you can talk about is Trump.

[@jensenon]

“What kind of maniac acts like he won when he lost?” Priceless!!!

[@Macgyver46]

He lost NH in 2016 which he lied about in his speech.

[@oracleofdelphi4533]

It's like both definitions of irony packaged into a single sentence. I didn't think it was possible.

[@donwold1622]

Spoken like only a truly pathological liar could do.

[@arctiknitter]

Pot calling kettle black!

[@hgr4255]

Obviously, and unfortunately his followers bolster that action. He's not slacking on votes, and that tells me a lot about Americans today - gone looney.

[@laalaa99stl]

"What kind of maniac pretends to win when they lost?" For someone who spends so much time in front of a mirror, his lack of self-reflection is quite remarkable, no?

[@cleverusername9369]

It's called "projection". He's perfectly aware that he's the maniac, he just projects everything he knows is wrong about him on everyone else. Every accusation is a confession. You can even see it sometimes when he speaks, he physically glitches when he has a verbal gaffe, he knows it, but his brain is so deteriorated and he's so narcissistic he just keeps going with word salad

[@ObsessiveSting]

Well when you are a self tanning poor hair having vampire lacking a reflection and an idiot it probably just looks like a fancy window into an identical room...

[@matthewtaylor2040]

spends alot more time infront of the american public than Biden. See how conversation works when we use facts? immediately emotion becomes...lets say...irrelevant

[@kidynamite58]

Irony is officially dead.

[@margaretwordnerd5210]

Mic drop!

[@Wonderworld0000]

I laughed a lot when Stephen put " meow!" That was a great point! Thank you all staff! ❤

[@user-wu1om1rw8t]

Wow - what a wonderful celebration of the Useless United States of United Failed States... When a state gives up on education, you get a shit hole like the Failed States. And lame hosts like Colbert = Failed States.

[@shermanculbertson6244]

Stephen Colbert is a national treasure that must be protected. Thank you Stephen for bringing laughter and levity to our lives.

[@matthewtaylor2040]

whatever makes you feel better about virtue signalling. I know Colbert's cut of Pfizer's profit makes him feel better even if its costing the tax payers

[@vickit3124]

Even love him all the way in Australia !!!

[@jeffd9782]

Never forget him during covid ❤😂😂😂

[@Woodbug-b7t]

......and thank God for Jon Stewart too !!

[@katwalkable]

And his angry indignant speech after Jan 6 coup! I was outraged too and scared and needed that!

[@Thegreatresetoflife]

As a Canadian...American get your poopoo together 😂im worried. Also if you need a place to crash. I got you. Cherry or maple syrup

[@darrenkirsch4870]

Maple please with a side of actual Healthcare

[@deborahchasteen3206]

Oh, please. Anything you want...

[@Tonyhouse1168]

We might just have to take you up on that

[@stefanieohrt6696]

Maple please. What are my chances of getting a work visa there? Contemplating my options for worst case scenarios. 😩

[@8arrows]

Nah. Toooooo fuggin cold.

[@PragmaticPerson]

“A woman in her 40’s.” “What kind of maniac pretend that they won when they lost?” Stephen was on fire last night! Great jokes 😀

[@miel1074]

The same people who cannot understand how a “Cornpop pony soldier’ could get more votes than JFK while campaigning from his basement!!!😂😂😂😂

[@user-wu1om1rw8t]

Wow - what a wonderful celebration of the Useless United States of United Failed States... When a state gives up on education, you get a shit hole like the Failed States. And lame hosts like Colbert = Failed States.

[@TentinQuarantino_]

The prescriptions being handed out like candy explains KellyAnne Conway’s whackadoodle alternative facts.

[@firstlast-gn5bo]

Alternative medications so they leave his Adderall stash alone. 😂

[@Trigger200284]

I find that very troubling. Not enough time was spent on how sketchy that sound either.

[@roxaskinghearts]

#REPUBLICANS STOP FINCLING IN THE MOUTH OF DEMOCRACY WHO ARE YOU DUBAI

[@alysiareid6659]

So true. I was on ambien for a very short time. I fell several times and did things I didn't remember.

[@justsayin8734]

I wonder if Cassidy has anything to say about drugs in the WH?

[@russellhammond371]

"He's 80 years old, didn't show up, and still kicked my ***." Ouch! lol

[@user-wu1om1rw8t]

Wow - what a wonderful celebration of the Useless United States of United Failed States... When a state gives up on education, you get a shit hole like the Failed States. And lame hosts like Colbert = Failed States.

[@SeamusOSiochfhradha]

"What kind of maniac pretends they won when they really lost anyway..." had me in stiches! Really good!

[@ashleytaveras9035]

Jon Stewart returning to 'The Daily Show" is the most exciting news to hear!!! 👏🥂👏🥂👏🥂

[@21972012145525]

I hope they air full episodes in KZbin because I don't watch TV anymore!

[@Turbojonny5]

Ikr!!🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@DisasterMaster3K]

Agreed!

[@Jerry-Falwells-Poolboy]

Mondays only, unfortunately.

[@LePedant]

@@21972012145525 They always post the opening monologue and usually the interviews.

[@elahm76]

if I could I would give a triple thumbs up for tonights show. You make it easier for this Swedish woman getting up in the morning knowing there will be a new show from you to see while I'm having the morning coffee. Thanks for giving my mornings a good start

[@kimberknutson831]

Excellent, as always. Thank you. I actually belly laughed several times during this monologue, and I love that feeling. The story about Stephen taking that prescription back in the day and what happened when he got home was awesome. Really good. Thanks again. : )

[@mattmanley7118]

Fantastic as usual!! Glad to have Stewart back even if only once a week. I do hope The Daily Show settles on a new permanent host soon… I’m glad to have Stewart back for this election cycle!❤

[@21972012145525]

I want Jon as a permanent host! Once a week, even once a month is fine with me!

[@AviationJeremy]

The Problem was excellent. Problem is that Jon refused to be a cuck for the CCP, so Apple cancelled him.

[@debrahelmlinger6256]

I like all the different hosts plus the correspondents, keeps it fresh

[@lseh4720]

I’m so sick of this orange menace

[@tuyenle8107]

trump 4ever 🤣😝🤣

[@matthewtaylor2040]

weird how his sons arent a 'menace' to society

[@DisasterMaster3K]

@@matthewtaylor2040he has one son then someone named eric that claims to be his son but really isn’t his son.

[@grmpEqweer]

@@matthewtaylor2040They have money and drugs. Why cause trouble?

[@aa-tx7th]

agreed! trump in prison 4ever! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@walterhoenig6569]

I’m not a Nikki fan, but the ex-president calling her ‘birdbrain’ is infuriating.

[@fransingolf5314]

Why?

[@freya8133]

​@@fransingolf5314Because it's the pot calling the kettle black?

[@Jerry-Falwells-Poolboy]

She and Dementia Donny are both birdbrains.

[@vjlong4581]

@@Jerry-Falwells-PoolboySo is Biden though we are actually screwed no matter which one wins...

[@vickilawrence7207]

It’s hilarious considering what a tick brain he is

[@water2wine1]

Every accusation and criticism is a confession. 😅

[@willekefarrington3020]

I'm watching this from Europe, The Netherlands. I congratulate the Stephen Colbert team on still being able to make comedy out of comedy.

[@shanedangers]

Blessings we are drowning in shit over here! We can't allow a repeat of January 6th.. but I fear it will come.. stay tuned lol

[@user-wu1om1rw8t]

Wow - what a wonderful celebration of the Useless United States of United Failed States... When a state gives up on education, you get a shit hole like the Failed States. And lame hosts like Colbert = Failed States.

[@rotterdammer5243]

Hey Fellow Dutchmeister! I`m 2nd generation Canadian, My Oma and Opa and the rest came to Canada after the war. It`s always good to talk to another dutchman. Take care, Proost!

[@dianaverano7878]

I really thought im watching mean girls. Trump should be the club president of mean girls club. The king bee.

[@jspres86]

I keep flashing back to that focus group back in 2016 where that guy said, "Three hundred and twenty million people in this country...and these are the best two we can come up with?"

[@davesky538]

I look forward all day for this monolog!

[@alvallac2171]

*monologue

[@mickjaguar242]

Actually brilliant for Haley to serve up winning sounding speeches. She should keep it up. It's the kind of 4D chess that'll drive Trump insane.

[@Kasino80]

Just ignore him and act like evrything is going as she wants.

[@Echo81Rumple83]

even if she loses to TFG, i hope she can run again four years from now :3

[@darkmyro]

Honestly she might win just on the fact that Trump has so many criminal charges against him, if one of those sticks and he gets convicted he's out of the race because you can't run with a criminal record I believe you unless there's some stipulation I don't know about. She might win by default.

[@kingjamos2422]

Trump hasn't even figured out Tic Tac To, yet. He keeps drawing duckies and bunnies.

[@Tanagra180]

​@Echo81Rumple83 Ugh, I don't. She wants abortion to remain illegal, can't admit that slavery was the cause of the the Civil War, and in the pockets of the industrial war complex. She's definitely better than Trump. But that's a helluva low bar! 😂

[@tammystockley-loughlin7680]

If only we were doomed to hopscotch. Positive vibes from New Hampshire, remember to be kind to each other and yourself during these trying times.

[@54mgtf22]

Say no to narcissism Say no to extremism Say no to authoritarianism Say no to fascism Say no to Trumpism SAY NO TO TRUMP

[@Runswithwolves6323]

Courage,loyalty,freedom,USA, TRUMP2024!!!🤟

[@rowann26]

Also say no to the GOP since it has all those!

[@JeffisWinning]

tRump for prison 2024!!!

[@lynemac2539]

​@@Runswithwolves6323 Runs with a racist sex offender who eye-balled his own daughter since she was a child, bankrupted several businesses including a casino or three, stole military secrets which may have implications for the current conflicts abroad, suggested suspending the Constitution, and simultaneously bragged and lied about it all because he's such a stable genius and a Legitimate Person. Wouldn't it be great if the kids in your life grow up to be just like him?

[@Jornandreja]

This rule would also exclude over half of Congress. Yes, some Democrats too.

[@phyllisclark4450]

I love Steve Colbert's monologues!

[@user-wu1om1rw8t]

Wow - what a wonderful celebration of the Useless United States of United Failed States... When a state gives up on education, you get a shit hole like the Failed States. And lame hosts like Colbert = Failed States.

[@danacronise4128]

Jon Stewart is a national treasure, and I can't wait to see him on the Daily Show again!

[@Opus313]

Donnie is very confused... mixing up Nikki / Nancy and Obama / Biden. Who's next? Alina / Melania...

[@brainflash1]

You mean Ivanka/Melania

[@Hellkite-er5pg]

​@@brainflash1, worse, Ivanka/Tiffany.

[@JourneyofOne971]

That's not a mistake. He'd confuse that on purpose.

[@jgmc1766]

Melania to ivanka

[@sevenprovinces]

It's a good thing he's not a Trekkie, I always was a bit confused in keeping up with the Cardassians. Maybe Justin Trudeau and Justin Timberlake? I mean...Canada...lots of timber, lots of lakes...surely Timberlake is the president of Michigan and the rest of Canada?

[@jayfeather965]

Donnie’s a little bit unhappy that literally anyone could possibly be against him. Suck it.

[@kidkong637]

Especially a woman of color! 😂😂

[@512Squared]

@@matthewtaylor2040 that's random

[@dickstryker]

​@@matthewtaylor2040 wumao, go home

[@Zalzany]

@@matthewtaylor2040 The problem is he thinks this is a playground, and he was pissed as fuck that she dared to get with to 11 points behind him in NH lol He threw a damn fit she ruined his landside victory, she was suppose to be there to make him look good not be a real rival lol.

[@869nf]

As a toddler 😅​@@matthewtaylor2040

[@feminist5641]

Bravo Stephen...best late night monologue after NH!

[@7thDayAdventures]

Gotta love CEOs doing the "I'm mad too guys" thing every time we catch them cutting corners to maximize profits. I'm sure it's all part of the equation they calculate to figure out how much our lives cost them.

[@seangoldman6833]

The very first thought I had when I heard that was to wonder how much profit he proudly reported to shareholders for cutting maintenance staff and shortening time for maintenance between flights. Obviously I don't know the circumstances but I'm willing to bet something like that happened.

[@yudithcaron8053]

Next, we will see a South Park-style apology video with this CEO saying "I'm sorry" a dozen times in front of different backgrounds. I can't wait to see the one where he's in front of a fire wearing nothing but his Fruit of the Loom.

[@mickdeegan4651]

Jaimie Dimon at Davos ,predicting Trumps win

[@kiwibob8967]

@seangoldman6833 This is not an Alaska Airlines maintenance problem. It is way too soon in their aircrafts life cycle for that depth of maintenance/inspection to have caused the problem. This is a quality control failure by the manufacturer.

[@warren52nz]

*_Is Trump EVER going to talk about policies to improve America or is he just going to whine like an 8 year old?_*

[@tinay9491]

whine, lie and cheat

[@HelynnHeels]

Revenge is his priority. His policies never seem to materialize.

[@lawrencelampke6007]

The latter

[@danburnes722]

He favors himself and Putin only. America just supplies the zombies that vote for him.

[@mitchellhensley2512]

Wrong, he is like a 5 y.o. with a severe learning disability.

[@dg8620]

"What kind of maniac pretends that they won when they really lost?" OMG I couldn't breathe. LMFAO

[@rafaelr5243]

Uhmm Hillary Clinton?? Stacey Abrams...need I go on.

[@peterblock6964]

Hillary Clinton won the popular vote, i.e. All Americans, @@rafaelr5243, by over 2 million votes. Because donald won the Electoral College due to a margin of ~80,000 votes in the crucial areas, Hillary Clinton conceded the election immediately. No whining about it being "rigged," no whining about "fake votes," no whining about "please find me x number of votes so I can win," no whining about how everyone is picking on her, no whining about being the most mistreated politician in HISTORY, just NO effin WHINING period. Diaper don-of-the-cheap-orange-clown-makeup IS the GWOAT: the Greatest Whiner Of All Time. … need I go on?

[@roxanecantrell712]

He shouldn't even be allowed to run for office. Not that he can run....or walk.

[@blueowlwill8754]

Hillary Clinton should not have insisted on her turn to run for presidency. Trump won because so many voted against her. I wrote in Bernie Sanders back then , and this round I will vote for RFK Jr

[@Rob_Cary]

Why would a Bernie supporter write in RFK? He's just a low key MAGA Democrat. You might wanna listen to some of his talking points bud lol. RFK is farther right than Biden.

[@CraftAmundous]

Here I thought he became ineligible once the courts started....but NNNNnooooooo. We is backwards as shit now.

[@riparianlife97701]

I've heard they put sandbags on his feet when he's at the podium.

[@matenzo]

Comeon man, it's not like Biden can do either of these things either. Like Trevor said the other night you gotta step back and take a long hard look at your own candidate every now and then... Pretty sure if you'd literally race Biden vs Trump they'd both pass out and break their hips after 1,5 minutes...

[@TECHN0]

In America, we don’t tell players to go home after a few mins in the 1st Qtr because a team is leading by 2 touchdowns. We let the game play out.

[@jillfromatlanta427]

A majority of 17% of Republican voters? How is that so yabba dabba doo fantastic? Delusional...

[@ZachTank2009]

As someone who worked in the aircraft maintenance space, loose bolts are common and unavoidable - they work themselves loose over time and have to be retightened periodically. Every single aircraft that came in had some number of loose bolts, and they could be detected visually usually because loose bolts are associated with dark streaks running aft out of them.

[@kiwibob8967]

What aircraft did you work on that didn't use lock tabs, or stiff nuts, or cotter pins, or lockwire to prevent bolts coming loose? Sure rivets will work lose over time, causing the streaks you describe, but not correctly secured bolts.

[@ZachTank2009]

@@kiwibob8967 fair enough, I am referring to rivets, not bolts technically. I was using “bolts” as a generic term for “fasteners”, which is, of course, incorrect but I suspect that is what Colbert is doing as well. The vast majority of fasteners on most aircraft are rivets. I worked on F-15’s.

[@camelsheit_on_the_walls446]

As long as Haley says she would pardon trump, she is disqualified in my eyes. Slightly less worse than him, but hardly any better. We need also to take into account the existence of the Project 2025, which by default makes _any_ republican into an immensely hazardous presidential material.

[@SleepyArcticBirds-ft4lb]

I agree! Trump should never be pardoned!

[@tuyenle8107]

trump 4ever 🤣😂😝

[@Coolestmovies]

@@tuyenle8107 The syphilis might say otherwise.

[@jamesricker3997]

​@@tuyenle8107Come on he was president, you can't send him to prison for that long

[@DCMarvelMultiverse]

All Republicans should be disqualified because they're Republicans. I've been doing so since 81.

[@hojichaisfarsuperiortochai9309]

Tim Scott looks like one of those guys who stands behind a news report just to get on tv. 😂😂😂 what a dork 😂😂😂

[@sheilaboston7051]

Well, he managed to get alongside donnie when he told him he loooooooved him. They're all sick.

[@KellsSmith1244]

“Hi mom! I’m on TV”

[@prof.scheere6933]

His smile is gross af like him

[@Slo-ryde]

I am surprised that he didn’t have a sign that said “ blacks for Trump”

[@hojichaisfarsuperiortochai9309]

@@hectorvazquez5867 perhaps one of the discontinued golden chocolate oreos to be accurate.

[@LyndenRathke]

Good all three of you guys are great This one was the best though In times like these we need all the humor we can get Oh and guess what none of it is dishonest. Nobody is being dissed that doesn’t deserve it. Etc. Not to long ago it looked like the powers that wanna be tried to stop you guys. It’s good to see there’s enough people around with morals.

[@VincentOwens2day]

Stephen Colbert is a national treasure.

[@DisasterMaster3K]

Nikki Haley is a national treasure.

[@matthewtaylor2040]

weird how neither one of them will be elected though

[@VincentOwens2day]

@@DisasterMaster3K Funny how the nation knew about Colbert for decades when the nation only now really knows Haley.

[@jamespeacock8665]

Says pretty much all you need to know about America. B0mb any poor people today?

[@Zalzany]

@@matthewtaylor2040 What Stephen Cobert is one person and isn't running I think you replied on wrong comment...

[@rosalie4797]

Thank God Steve is available here! I fell asleep and missed all but the last minute of the monologue on tv!😮

[@temporarystranger95]

Hilarious! I spit up my coffee on, “Those who fail to remember to history are doomed to hopscotch.” 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

[@user-wu1om1rw8t]

Wow - what a wonderful celebration of the Useless United States of United Failed States... When a state gives up on education, you get a shit hole like the Failed States. And lame hosts like Colbert = Failed States.

[@charlottegibbs8950]

This was Stephen's funniest monologue in as long as I can remember.

[@drwisdom1]

Particularly good show tonight with lots of very funny jokes.

[@aggressiveattitudeera887]

"Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to hopscotch." - Benjamin Franklin.

[@matthewtaylor2040]

Its honestly a lot more exercise than most are getting nowadays

[@bbbb3341]

😅

[@carlito1ish]

Hail Galvatron crazy as Trump 😂🤣

[@dannyrobert1382]

" ... - Benjamin Franklin" - Winston Churchill

[@Flamenco1313]

That has now become my Colbert fav 😂😂😂.

[@sheltonbailey6548]

Colbert just kills me! 😂😅 great monologue!

[@laurettamaginley7325]

Keep up the great reporting. Sweet about new Daily Show Host, "How sweet it is !"

[@humanoid251]

The fact that Vermin Supreme’s “hamster wheel technology” is actually more realistic and sound than anything Trump has ever said is depressingly hilarious

[@grmpEqweer]

I've listened to a Vermin Supreme interview...and Vermin is the better-qualified candidate of the two.

[@requiemforameme1]

Dude’s rhetoric skills lies somewhere between used car salesman and amateur wrestler. Which is leagues ahead of Cheeto-Man. Checks out 100%. I’d buy Mr. Supreme a beer.

[@watersipper1116]

His hat choice is better, and I'm not tired of hearing his name yet. Consider writing in Vermin Supreme when you vote.

[@kingjamos2422]

Hamster wheel technology definitely trumps an invisible wall with solar panels to pay for itself even though Mexico is paying for it. But most importantly, Vermin Supreme is just fun to say.

[@nikobatallones]

Trump will be against it. It's like a windmill. Bad for the birds.

[@OlyOly-uh5ik]

I saw Uncle Tim behind Trump, dutifully smiling at Trump’s every sentence.

[@Slo-ryde]

He learned well from Lindsay

[@cathyleatherman3097]

Trump never makes sense … a few minutes listening to him you realize something is mentally wrong with him

[@janetblanc7658]

Obsequious in the extreme

[@canadaclaret]

Spelled "Tim" , pronounced "Tom."

[@talltrini10]

He was resting between shucks and jives

[@TheOldHippiebilly]

Jon Stewart back on the Daily Show? Best news I've heard in years! ❤❤❤

[@SKC193]

“You can’t let people get away with bullshit”?! From Mr. Bullshit himself!😂😂😂😂

[@gingercat777]

Tim Scott standing behind in the danger zone like a dog waiting for a treat 😂

[@stephensarkany3577]

Vice president gums.

[@suzanneelizabeth9862]

He’s defiantly first in line to change Trumps diaper!

[@auroradawn4531]

Uncle Tim.

[@suzanneelizabeth9862]

@@auroradawn4531 - clearly , he’s wiping up trumps slobber in front of millions of people! Though waiting to be one of the privileged few to change his soaked diaper .

[@alvallac2171]

@@suzanneelizabeth9862 *definitely (different meaning and pronunciation)

[@ignaciaforteza7731]

You are just GREAT. I LOVE WATCHING YOU!

[@later_daze_4080]

Trump supporters after 8 years still haven’t figured out Trump wouldn’t bother to piss on them if they were on fire.

[@Brasswatchman]

And they'd thank him for it.

[@Slo-ryde]

They feel they are not worthy of getting pissed on by the orange messiah !!

[@ScottishRoyal1]

Trump does like piss though just the other way round.

[@liamonyor]

Could be because the democrats throw gas on you when your on fire. @@Brasswatchman

[@pschroeter1]

And make them pay for the privilege. @@Brasswatchman

[@sharonkellner7126]

Trump worries about Niki’s dress. He only worries about the really important things. And he never forgets history.

[@richard1472]

How can you forget something you never knew in the first place? Trump doesn't even know the words to The Star-Spangled Banner, or the Pledge of Allegiance. He's about as American as a Scottish kilt.

[@emilyfeagin2673]

He would have worn it but they didn’t carry it in his size

[@grmpEqweer]

The guy probably has dementia.

[@JLee-rt6ve]

Trump: If the British had listened to me, they would have built a wall along the Delaware and kept that illegal immigrant Jorge Washington out.

[@sheilaboston7051]

How could we all have forgotten about the airports during the Revolutionary War? 🤣🤣

[@LadyMoonsparrow]

Excellent monologue as always! I did feel so very bad for him talking about his experience with that drug. It must have been terrifying. He had a great attitude about it though! I always love watching Stephen Colbert!

[@todd3205]

The writers on TLS are writing some classic kick ass, and Mr. Colbert is delivering it.

[@matthewtaylor2040]

Whats classic is Colberts act before having to obey covid restrictions. He was good once but that feels like forever ago. cant believe i fell for this guys guise

[@spacemanx9595]

​@@matthewtaylor2040smoke less maga crack

[@HTub-bo2yl]

@@matthewtaylor2040Are you ok?? Seems like you might need observation

[@JohnSmith-vs9rs]

"Can't let people get away with bull$###" You know, mister, you're absolutely right. That's why you're in court, for several things. trump is the walking definition of bull$###

[@histman3133]

And that's why he always wins. 😂You idiot lefties have been trying to impeach him for years on your bullshit charges and the man keeps coming out stronger than ever! MAGA 2024!

[@CraftAmundous]

It's a do as I say, not as I do kind of administration.

[@yobets5225]

I am definitely sick of tRump’s bullish💩t

[@riparianlife97701]

At least Trump doesn't think he's a white woman.

[@gordonanderson3111]

Would you say "LOCK HIM UP" loudly, repeatedly and with calm authority? GITMO DONALD!

[@dancepiglover]

[Trump] has never been so happy to see a woman in her 40’s - except his own daughter.

[@user-wu1om1rw8t]

Wow - what a wonderful celebration of the Useless United States of United Failed States... When a state gives up on education, you get a shit hole like the Failed States. And lame hosts like Colbert = Failed States.

[@MegaForrestgump]

"Wearing a fancy dress that wasn't so fancy" Woah, kitty has claws!!!

[@eric2500]

He's no kitty, nor is he anything else cute or sweet.

[@MegaForrestgump]

@@eric2500 Demon has claws? 😆

[@susiepoadster4642]

@@MegaForrestgump He’s a PAB for sure 😂

[@MrBsbotto]

What a ridiculous old gasbag.

[@user-wu1om1rw8t]

Wow - what a wonderful celebration of the Useless United States of United Failed States... When a state gives up on education, you get a shit hole like the Failed States. And lame hosts like Colbert = Failed States.

[@BigVictor]

Bring Jon Stewart on! Help him get some more eyeballs on his return to the Daily Show! Please.

[@21972012145525]

Help him?! Jon made Colbert. He doesn't need help

[@matthewtaylor2040]

Jon hasn't done anything, even when he tried to help those afflicted from 9/11. Hes the Donner Kruger effect

[@elliechristie2498]

Stephen! What a good singing voice you have! More please!❤️

[@davidgoldstein729]

"Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it... in summer school."

[@michaelrmurphy2734]

OMG!! Poor Stephen! Those drugs and his appendix! He needs Evie to look out for him. Hours long flight? Just sing Barrett's Privateers, that will keep you awake! Sounds like Trump is in late stage Elvis. The "Mar-A-Lago Mafia"! The white jumpsuit next!

[@jessicabarber5835]

So glad John is back. We need him.

[@Lokua]

I really hope people take a little time to reflect on how blessed we are to have a show this good. I'm constantly astounded by how good the writing is and how talented Stephen is. Even his physical mannerisms - seemingly simple stuff that nobody else does like snapping his fingers by his ears "did i hear that correctly?" Handing mimed props back to off camera when he's done with a bit - just brilliant. So happy Jon Stewart is coming back because the last time we had two shows on the air that were this good at the same time was...guess who? Best news shows, best comedy shows, and some of the only relief I get.

[@pikhy]

And....I thoroughly enjoyed Trevor Noah and every single guest host and cast member of The Daily Show in the interim!

[@alvallac2171]

*constantly *Jon

[@Lokua]

@@alvallac2171 thanks for the correktion.

[@Lokua]

* correktionS

[@ReaverLordTonus]

First, forget the Daily show, Jon Stewart should run for congress, imagine how much of a verbal smack down he'd be dishing out every week. Second, Haley should refuse to concede just to piss Trump off, make him know what it feels like.

[@Echo81Rumple83]

if Volodymyr Zelenskyy could become president in Ukraine, so should folks like Jon Stewart in the US :3

[@joaquinpaul8205]

​@@Echo81Rumple83hell yes I can't think of anyone better

[@SPrueser1]

That would really be something! 🙂 until the end of the primary!

[@Mondfischli]

... that's what made him so angry - going back to the trial in New York without being the nominee 😂

[@alvallac2171]

*Jon

[@chrisprescott2273]

Hearing that John Stewart is coming back to the Dailey show was the best news Ive heard in ages.

[@adantigus]

Provigil is pretty wild. It's like having your own personal drill sergeant in your brain screaming at you if you even think about getting sleepy.

[@Sweetyhide]

For normal people, yes. Sometimes, for me, I might as well be eating tic tacs.

[@RainAngel111]

That provigil story was one of the best bits Stephen has done in a long time

[@amberzec]

Jon Stewart comin back is the best news u could've given me this morning 😂❤❤

[@sarahbarrett1247]

Jon Stewart back at the Daily Show, even if it’s only one day a week, is the best news I’ve heard since he announced he was leaving 🎉

[@kylestubbs8867]

“He’s just going through the stages of grief: Denial, Anger, Popping Sound, Cold Draft, Oh Crap, the Window!, Hold Onto Something!, Ahhhhhhhh!” -Stephen Colbert

[@justsaying14]

😁😁😁 👍

[@airo2theknee846]

The best joke in the whole episode

[@JJ-fu4by]

Thanks Stephen Colbert for focusing on the real issues and not silly stuff like the border crisis or how we’re involved in 2 wars.

[@kendric2000-q3d]

Joe Biden (who wasn't on the ballot) 68,000 votes Trump (who spent 26 million in the state) 59,000 votes

[@hughjorg4008]

Good news, yet we must all go and all vote for BIDEN this November. ✌ Tell everyone you know to vote for BIDEN. Trump is too dangerous to our democracy.

[@michaelcrispin1879]

@@CornPoppe-io5wc Wipe that orange spooge off your lips

[@Denidrakes69]

Both figures are incorrect. Don't do what Trumpers do.

[@latinoburger123]

@@CornPoppe-io5wcgo listen to Trump then, you’ll get a better lie like “I’ll fight for you” or “I understand you”

[@FLPhotoCatcher]

@@hughjorg4008 Just convict Trump already! Is that too hard?

[@teresatrigiani7838]

I love this man. Always spot on.

[@TomBelknapRoc]

3:35 FISHBONE REFERENCE! Deep cut, too. Well played, Steve. Well played.

[@pattiaustin1808]

Oh, we’re so gonna repeat. 81 million of us voted that vile creature out in 2020. Let’s bring out 84 million in 2024! Vote Blue!

[@LB-ye1fj]

Yeah, whoohoo 😐 we see the shithole this country is running into with blue, look what blue did to Seattle and Detroit.

[@Dimmary]

Not Biden. That guy is on his way to the grave.

[@nomore6167]

"Oh, we’re so gonna repeat. 81 million of us voted that vile creature out in 2020" - We'll be extremely lucky if we can get anywhere close to 81 million this time around. Biden has screwed the country by supporting Israel's genocide, by keeping Garland around when he clearly has no interest in upholding or enforcing the Constitution, and for keeping Trump loyalists in senior level positions for far too long.

[@havable]

It will be even more than that. Four years of GenZ have aged in to the electorate. GenZ is the most votingest generation since the world war 2 generation, which is the generation that has dominated our politics for the last 80 years. And GenZ is lovely woke. They're not voting for Trump, and will probably never vote for republicans period. For, in their formative political years, they were being attacked constantly by the republicans, their friends were being dehumanized (if not they themselves). The last thing they're ever going to do is elect republicans to office. And they vote like crazy. They understand the value of voting better than my generation or my parents' or their parents'.

[@Clairebearthegoodfinder]

🇺🇸blue can count on me.

[@lillia2479]

I was waiting the whole time for Steven to say that "Hopscotch" was trump's safe word. 😂

[@spinthis56]

*EXCELLENT, Stephen Colbert!!!* 💙💙💙

[@MsJMHS]

I always appreciate Vermin Supreme's chaotic energy.

[@lifeinhd4053]

Daily Show was never the same without Stewart. Best news all year!

[@Zalzany]

Exactly some them were "ok" but its not same since he left.

[@susiepoadster4642]

Love Stephen giving Jon a Colbert bump! ❤

[@Feral6-h3g]

For the Trump supporters. “It’s easy to fool a man, but it’s nearly impossible to convince him he’s been fooled.” - Mark Twain

[@jeffd9782]

"Our Army manned the air, it rammed the ramparts, it took over the airports," Trump said of the fighting force created by the Continental Congress in 1775. Trump is such a moron

[@NuiYabuko]

​@@eimisavageofficial9196 I doubt the Rubel has much worth now.

[@jeffd9782]

"Our Army manned the air, it rammed the ramparts, it took over the airports," Trump said of the fighting force created by the Continental Congress in 1775.

[@meh8982]

That flat, boring, graceless sentence would never have been written by Mark Twain.

[@Thomas-fj8ol]

enjoy a repeat of 2020 maga fascist traitor!@@meh8982

[@sararaven]

I just did the math, I've been watching Stephen on various shows talking about the primaries since he started talking about the primaries ☺️ Thank you for comically guiding us through the horror show that is our electoral process ❤

[@justanaxoIotl]

This is the first I'd heard of Stewart back on Daily Show, and I am PUMPED!

[@tiosino]

Alaska Airlines CEO says company found loose bolts on ‘many’ Boeing Max 9s. Geez, Stephen! Don't remind me! That's the plane I'll be flying on to Seattle soon. 😳

[@yurielcundangan9090]

Trump should be truly held accountable

[@matthewtaylor2040]

for what? saying it how it is as well as doing what he says hes gonna do? said to grab em by the p****y and he did, atleast hes not a liar. credit where credits due

[@DisasterMaster3K]

Biden should be held accountable for his crimes.

[@Zalzany]

@@DisasterMaster3K Name one they got evidence of. You need a real crime not just BS saying there is one lol. Even GOP has failed to find one damn crime lol Shit the "took money from china" BS they got all his finacials even before he was president and when he was VP they can't find one damn thing to back it, but DUMP just owned up to taking 5 million that we know of from China when president and we only looked at 1/10 of his companies for 2 of his 4 years before speaker shut them down and took away access to his records lol. They found over 8 million from just 10% of the companies dump owns taking bribes lol.

[@calisto2735]

@@DisasterMaster3K Cool story. When you find any evidence, be sure to call the DOJ 👍

[@Markus_Andrew]

@@DisasterMaster3K And what crimes might they be? That's a rhetorical question of course, I know you won't have an answer. You lot never do.

[@xdeonyx1]

I have excessive daytime sleepiness. I’ve never been so startled to hear someone ask me for medicine I definitely have

[@gogreen7794]

Trump was certainly pouring out the whine last night. And this is the guy the majority of Republicans want to be back in the White House.

[@b.comeau2597]

Pouring out the whine….perfectly stated!

[@musicinggp]

Only to pardon all the January 6 house and senate members and those in his administration who aided and abetted the insurrectionists.

[@ely4935]

⁠@@musicinggphe is going to free the “hostages”

[@matthewtaylor2040]

good one! took your time thinking that one

[@B_Bodziak]

He's always been whining not winning.

[@iyeetsecurity922]

I 100% think that _Jon Stewart_ would be one of the best *presidents* in history.

[@maltliquorgaming7822]

I would move to the us for that. :D

[@prof.scheere6933]

Jon Stewart would crush

[@FaithHopeHeart3-5]

S. Colbert Rocks! Love your show!👍

[@YusufGinnah]

Colbert: "Trump is losing with Independents..." *Trump: "That's were you're completely wrong Stephen... I won 2016 **_in Depends"_*

[@matthewtaylor2040]

He aint losing. Period. The people are fed up with losing however

[@spacemanx9595]

@@matthewtaylor2040 smoke less maga crack

[@rossnunez3512]

🥁 🥁 🥁

[@Zalzany]

@@matthewtaylor2040 He hasn't won a damn thing minus the redhat votes lol. What was the last court case he won again? Shit must been back in like 2015 or some shit lol. And I bet he just out spent the other person

[@GreenBeanGreenBean]

​@@matthewtaylor2040chump is a loser. Period

[@adamfrazer5150]

"Those that don't learn from history......we're not gonna get fooled again" 😐

[@tonyduncan9852]

US: What's history? Rest of World: facepalm.

[@anushapremkumar7356]

I’ve never been so hype for a TV show as I am for Jon’s return to TDS. We missed you sir!!😭😭🫡

[@ronbrittany8592]

This is my best source of news and no one tells it better than you.

[@alro11]

Jon Stewert is coming back starting in February once/week🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@alvallac2171]

*Stewart