Trump's Tiny Police Reform Order Doesn't Honor His Pledge To Families Of Police Shooting Victims

[@evettemccollum4993]

Colbert show is necessary for sanity

[@pipertarver1852]

Ok!!! And a couple of drinks!!! 🍸🍷🍹🍻🍺🙌🙌🙌 😂😂😂😂😂

[@JoeBlow_4]

he's a nitwit

[@gregoryferber3231]

I would like to thank your wife for helping to bring us your glorious show.

[@dianewilkins4418]

Gregory Ferber I love it when she giggles 🤭

[@kathryndavidson5056]

Yes & his son too. Some nights it seems like Colbert’s starting to crack like the rest of us; just seems be having way to much fun tonight. Bless you for your smarting satire and making me laugh. My sentiments exactly!

[@vajrayoga]

Stephen & Evie ❤️ So sweet. Love their interactions! True love :)

[@jimbodeathgrip]

It's such a small number of "bad apples" a national database is needed.

[@omgitsbamboozle7393]

Damn that's true

[@HaloTreatTricks]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/bmG1pXWbd5tkgqc

[@trixy8705]

He said that to shut all the cry babies out there up. If the police chiefs or whomever is in charge did their jobs, an expensive data base would not be needed. A Data base is not going to weed out the psychopaths that become police officers. People are stupid.

[@pawala7]

If a few bad apples were killing people of a specific race, I'm pretty sure there should've been some radical changes in quality control by now.

[@alanheyes694]

You see, they announce these things. But they never truly enforce ‘em. That’s the problem.

[@mytexasdays1526]

Bolten said nothing when his county needed him at the hearings, now he's talking to everyone for his personal financial benefit.

[@kathryn3950]

Remember there were debates about having witnesses and it was voted down?

[@AsimKhan-nu9nj]

@Scuba Steve remember, " i hire the best of the best" & "drain the swamp". And wasn't he blocked by yours truly to speak freely before the book came out?

[@gregwarner3753]

Republican sleaze balls are not hard to detect. Bolton will always put personal profit over civil duty to protect the country. No surprise there.

[@smiller2044]

@@gregwarner3753 that's the Republican way!

[@fluidthought42]

@@tonycuesta862 Depends, by Deep State do you mean the intelligence agencies' apparatus that spans several administrations and is usually in favor of reinforcing Americas' imperialism or do you mean "government person who opposes Trump, thus automatically bad"?

[@copernicofelinis]

Wow, he forgot about the promise right in the middle of it. This is a new record for a politician.

[@HaloTreatTricks]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/bmG1pXWbd5tkgqc

[@HaloTreatTricks]

Greatings from the Netherlands Charles-A Rovira no I didn't, i have it very busy so I don't have time to listen to it but here are also some other cool metal band: kzbin.info/www/bejne/fpuVp4hoo9dogNk cool song: kzbin.info/www/bejne/e3WuqHaseZppodk

[@allanmenard1651]

Are the doctors just keeping him alive? I swear he is stroking out on a regular basis.

[@Brett_S_420]

He talks like a malfunctioning robot. Especially when you read his speeches.

[@dreammerchant4442]

COULD AMERICA BE SO LUCKY..HES GOTTA BE ON BARROWED TIME. HOW MANY HEARTS DID ROCKEFELLER GET BEFORE HE DIED? HIS MONEY KEPT HIM ALIVE FOR SO LONG..6 HEART TRANSPLANT ALL WASTED ON A PIG..

[@tiegrsidesignsandstudio4794]

He wears a shock collar around his chest so someone can give him a little zap when he starts winding down.

[@wintercomesearly]

@@dreammerchant4442 Sounds like Dick Cheney.

[@Canuckmom128]

@Allan Menard PLEASE...VOTE HIM OUT on November 3rd, so the SDNY can get him convicted before his Dementia gets bad. Just wait...he will try to pull a Harvey Weinstein and show up at Court with a whip-lash collar and a walker. 340 Million Americans, and somehow the biggest Imbecile of the bunch is squatting in the Oval Office. It still defies belief ! VOTE 🌊🌊🌊

[@shannybug666]

I would say Trump talks like a first grader, but that's unfair to first graders.

[@SeansModelBuilds]

I have known more mature newborns.

[@g0679]

Shannon Lampi His emotional maturity is even more “impressive.”

[@ericklaus3972]

So what about Biden he can't put a sentence together?

[@jasong9492]

As a teacher, I agree.

[@mariom6368]

Just.... Uneducated

[@WRDW_OKC]

Please, oh PLEASE do a “Bolton Bedtime Stories” bit every night, and read selected bits to America!

[@bjorngylling3187]

154*@

[@smiller2044]

Billy Smork next new novel?

[@coltafanan]

Just to tell us things we already know?

[@janwag6856]

Oh Stephen, for those of us who have been living the life of a hermit who are numb at the many disasters and societal struggles I totally appreciate your continued ability to frame it so I can handle the times of our lives. Thank you 🙏

[@lovenaturenaturallybu3703]

"Deliver, Safe, beautiful, elegant, justice!" Only a stable genius can have trail mix of words like this which makes no sense..

[@peacemonger766]

I think he just needed a Tiny cup of Covfefe!

[@amykruse6887]

It's an affront to intelligence to listen to potus speak.

[@lanmandragoran8337]

@@amykruse6887 I don't think any decent republican with a brain is still considering Trump as a second term is in some way a good thing. We need to divide off a portion of texas and send all the people who vote trump this election there. Its where we hold the people too stupid for rational thoughts and decisions based on logic and facts and history. Those people don't need the right to vote anymore. We also give them free rent/food/etc. but peel the warning labels off from every item before giving it to them. Entire society won't last the decade.

[@Barbann-u2q]

😆 lol

[@Ksportin]

"Chokeholds will be banned except where an officers life is at risk." That makes no sense. A chokehold is a method of restraint. If the officer is able to apply a chokehold on to a suspect then they have control over the suspect and is not in danger from that suspect and therefore isn't keeping them safe. A chokehold won't stop multiple assailants. There are also ways of restraining individuals that doesn't cut off oxygen supply or blood flow and risk life. Other police forces around the world manage to restrain suspects without choking them Also if this is followed through with and an officer applies a chokehold, who will be the judge of whether or not it was justified or criminal. Other officers have an obvious bias to stick up for one another and prosecutors are similarly disposed. One of the reasons prosecutions of officers is so rare is that prosecutors work so closely with officers and have to effectively turn against an officer they may have worked with for many years, and will have to work with their colleagues for many more. So if an officer applies a chokehold and a complaint is made, the same thing will happen as it does now. Nothing will happen unless a significant amount of evidence and public uproar causes the officer to be fired, where upon they are free to get a new job in another precinct or state

[@sharongamble9854]

It makes perfect sense. Officers have a right to defend themselves from attackers. Or should they do as you would do--- just surrender to being murdered?

[@Ksportin]

​@@sharongamble9854 Where did I say that an officer cannot defend themselves? Where did I suggest anything like that. If you'd actually bothered to read what I said, you'd have seen that what I explained clearly is that chokeholds are applied on a pinned suspect, i.e. NOT A LETHAL THREAT. If an officer has the ability to pin a suspect to the ground by the throat, that suspect is not an imminent threat to the officers life. Furthermore, as I also stated, the policy of allowing it in situations where an officer's life is at risk is vague and ripe for abuse. It leaves the excuse for chokeholds to continue being usedwith little or no oversight. Essentially, nothing will have changed.

[@teresas8929]

Sharon Gamble yes they do, but if they can apply a chokehold, they are able to use other methods of restraint.

[@SmashToBits]

@@sharongamble9854 No sharon, It is not necessary to murder somone to defend yourself. I dont know if you know this, but police are trained in ways of defending themselves in ways that dont murder people. Defending the use of a chokehold while you have a buddies with weapons right beside you is a feeble argument.

[@Richard_Nickerson]

Shooting people dead are only supposed to be when the officer's life is at risk too. That method simply doesn't work.

[@NotEnoughBooks]

When I’m president, I’m being sworn in with a Terry Pratchett book, they make you radically compassionate, and angry at the state of the world.

[@owlseye7108]

I'll probably vote for you just based on this comment lol

[@sabrinafinkel92]

@@owlseye7108 same here, great choice. Sam Vimes would sort it out. Hell, The Patrician would!

[@sabrinafinkel92]

Yes yes YES!

[@MildWilliam]

Granny Weatherwax for running mate.

[@Aine197]

Your comment made my day!

[@juliegolucky]

When they played the clip of Barr saying that printing hadn't finished yet AND THEN STEPHEN HOLDS UP THE BOOK. I'm dead.

[@GregKeane]

it was a a whaaaaaa?? moment.

[@ottotater2787]

My brother-in-law is a writer and they always get a pre-release practically blank book with a mock-up of the cover. If and when a writer ever does a book signing, they always put that original mockup copy on the table behind them next to the current act release copy. it's just a standard practice. they might get that mock-up months or even a year or more ahead of the printing of the book. not to mention when I say printings they mean sellable prints. not the first few hundred prints that they get a couple of boxes of up front. The actual public release date is often vastly different dates from when the writer gets his copies.

[@igorschmidlapp6987]

@@ottotater2787 Rachel Maddow got the book too, but said that she hadn't read it because of the press embargo till the release date, and didn't want to accidentally violate it by commenting by reference somehow. It's like show hosts/critics get discs of movies that stars are going to promote on their shows and critics can write their reviews to be published on release day (it's already #1 on Amazon's pre-order list).

[@karencarr8845]

@Otto Tater The release date is week away. Books already have been shipped around the country. These are not pre-release copies (yes, Colbert May have a pre- release copy). Barr seems to think they don’t start printing until the release date. Nope. They will be selling those suckers next week. He is too late ( should been involved when the NSA reviewed it in April).

[@lastpenny849]

I guess the White House didn't get a free copy...

[@NewMessage]

You'd think Donnie would know Breach of Contract, considering how many contractors have taken him into court for it come pay day.

[@chilipeppa7388]

Juzek Pilsucki Ah yes a wall we’re paying for? Remember when he said Mexico was paying for it? What happened to that again? 😂

[@shoutyman9922]

It seems that two kinds of people become police officers: Eagle Scouts and school bullies. The scouts join to do good, the bullies to continue bullying. Unfortunately the worst o the bullies end up running their unions.

[@rebagord]

^^^ yup

[@HaloTreatTricks]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/bmG1pXWbd5tkgqc

[@trixy8705]

Very smart man among a bunch of dummies everywhere. Thank you

[@merbst]

The eagle scouts get fired quickly.

[@gkess7106]

Cleveland. Was. The. Worst!

[@VG19319]

I thoroughly enjoy when Stephen speaks to his family members on air. Love it!!!

[@raymondkymsuttle]

“Two wrongs make a rally full of whites”. Steven Colbert’s writers are genius.

[@sadiestoltzfus9798]

Colbert hates his own race.

[@Snaakie83]

@@sadiestoltzfus9798 Haven't you learned at school what a race is?

[@arondajackson1880]

Right is a race? As opposed to wrong?

[@faaaszoooom6778]

@@sadiestoltzfus9798 No, he does not. Also, white is not a race.

[@richeaton7436]

Mental Masturbation

[@ramieres85]

Can´t let some people potentially dying get in the way of trump having his ego stroked at a rally...

[@srkh8966]

horst hejel Attendance is entirely voluntary-At some point, people have to be responsible for their own actions.

[@Starman_Dx]

@@srkh8966 You're talking about the party of "I don't take responsibility at all"

[@spir5102]

@@srkh8966 true. Obviously the cult leader doesn't care about the lives of his cult members. And apparently they're too ignorant to see what he's doing.

[@TwoWhiteStepbrothers]

S H The people infected five days later by those who go to the rallies are not doing that voluntarily...

[@sharongamble9854]

With 800,000 wishing to attend his rally, it' s likely the odds someone will fall ill during the rally. It happens in stadiums during athletic events, at musical concerts, and even at protest rallies. Sometimes it even happens during Colbert taping.

[@ChristmasLore]

As usual, he turned the event in a mini rally, ending speaking about himself for most of the time. Then refused to take questions, and this time, yes, literally ran from reporters. It's especially distressing, given the solemnity of the topic, the seriousness of the issue.

[@jesterscupcake]

You know I never thought I’d be okay with rally, but when you mention 19K coughing on Trump for a couple hours... I’m coming around to it. Js.

[@thingamabob3902]

breathing and shouting to (hopefully) make the world a better place ;-)

[@staciev8917]

19k? the ralley sold milions. Already

[@teresathayn5170]

The Purge???

[@nothere7198]

@@staciev8917 : The venue only holds 19K as I understand it. And the bulk of the millions signed up is rumored to be Democratic trolls with a wicked sense of humor.

[@nothere7198]

Nah, I expect POTUS Bonespurs Bunkerboy will have measures in place to protect himself. Be looking for tell-tale signs of large fans behind him blowing all the hate spittle back on the raving deplorables. At the very least he'll have His bulletproof (but not idiot proof) teleprompter screen between Him and intelligent germs. If he doesn't go full Bubbleboy.

[@laalaa99stl]

The choke hold exemption is like the "it's comin' right for us" loophole from South Park.

[@yolandadenny8692]

Cops have used the "fear for my life" defense for years. Every time they kill someone that is the line they use. They have shot 5'3" women running away from them and they use this defense and no one questions it. Trump is letting them go back to business as usual.

[@HaloTreatTricks]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/bmG1pXWbd5tkgqc

[@Karmal1st3k]

Have any of u guys looked at the link im to scared..lol

[@TheMulToyVerse]

Kam It’s either gonna put me on a list... Or it’s gonna shadow-install something on my phone Or worse, it’ll add my digital signature to a “Happy Belated Birthday” card for trump 🤔😖😖😖

[@LeftoverBeefcake]

Steve Doocy has to explain to the guy that just headed the government's pandemic task force why it's a bad idea to hold an indoor event during a pandemic. Wow.

[@erikad0511]

Reporter: "books been published, not released yet" Barr: "no it hasnt" Colbert pulls out tf book .. LMAO!!

[@louisdelmonte8728]

Doesn't ' published' mean widely available for the general public? This book ssems to have been handed out to a select audience.

[@pampayne4482]

I’m gonna watch that again 😁

[@Coolestmovies]

Louis Delmonte - published means printed and distribution begun, regardless of quantities or who gets them first.

[@BeMystifiedSelfHelpTipsbyGaya]

The whole team is a circus. Nobody is sure wtf is happening.

[@BeMystifiedSelfHelpTipsbyGaya]

@@louisdelmonte8728 no they send it out in advance for publicity reasons. That's why influential people have a copy but like Stephen said, it's embargoed till the official date it goes on sale to the public. Until then they are not supposed to talk about the contents. So these influencers are supposed to read it and publicise their comments on it on the agreed day, so the people who follow them will learn about it and may consider purchasing it. It's PR and Marketing. How do I know? I'm in that field of work 😁

[@uthmanbaksh3530]

Reporter: "It's been published." Bill Barr: "No it hasn't!" Stephen Colbert: Yes it has, I got it right here! *Pwnage 100*

[@genuinejustin6269]

Does anyone else wonder how his wife isn't cracking up on the side of him doing his monologue???

[@genuinejustin6269]

@Amadeo komnenus lol ouch

[@tinker651]

I'd be horrid at being quiet 😅

[@genuinejustin6269]

@@tinker651 I know that's what I mean lol. Like there's no way I could just sit there and be silent. Although you can actually hear her laugh in this one when he makes fun of Trump with the book.

[@ChristmasLore]

Easy. Not everyone laughs out loud. Stephen makes me smile, mainly. Sometimes, very rarely, he brings me to tears, laughing or not. But not everyone sounds like a studio audience, most often than not, hyperhyped.

[@SLCtica]

4:33 she sort of murmurs

[@ChandlerSomborac]

Watching Trump forget something that quickly is like watching your drunk uncle, at a wedding, trying to recover from the fact that he's clearly forgotten half his speech.

[@ChandlerSomborac]

@mark bushnell LMAO!

[@sandrad8640]

Yes Wanda Sykes summed that one up nicely

[@amyelizabeth529]

...and the name of his niece or nephew.

[@cody4763]

It's that hydroxychloroquine

[@gl1500ctv]

And he says Biden doesn't know where he is most of the time?

[@Opus313]

The solace of these times is knowing that there is a chance for a future that is far better than this!

[@babarazamsucks]

Opus 313 🤲🤲🤲I hope to God that what you said here is exactly what happens in the future! Ameen Sumameen!🙏🙏🙏

[@ACKZink]

Maybe not for us or our kids. 😔

[@ChristmasLore]

(Solace) 🌿

[@Opus313]

@@ChristmasLore Thank you.

[@largo778]

don't say that, 2020 isn't over yet!

[@mangotoolie9002]

Stephen Colbert is so amiable he warms my heart every time I watch him

[@infinitejest441]

He’s a good looking Groucho

[@scottchadwick1517]

We honestly need a maximum age limit on political careers.

[@daandb4642]

I agree

[@heidishmidi]

And mandatory drug testing 😬

[@moflo303]

Totally agree, been saying that for years!

[@peacemonger766]

Term Limits Please!

[@rockyp3917]

65

[@brandondavidson4085]

"unless the officer's life is in danger" is how we got INTO THIS MESS!

[@sadiestoltzfus9798]

Anyone who want's too resist arrest is a dumb ass.

[@debrahelmlinger6256]

Even if you don't resist, they beat you up anyway just for fun after you are handcuffed, then lie and say you tripped and fell just like the report on the old man that was pushed.

[@selalewow]

"He's coming right for us!"

[@artlyons9024]

EXACTLY!!!!!

[@daniaa1602]

@@sadiestoltzfus9798 wow. It must be hard to be this fcking stupid.

[@nazcomedy1762]

"I ended systemic police brutality and racism". Trump a few weeks from now

[@akaimizu1]

I actually posted what Trump will do, and even what kind of revisionist speech he'll use for it, an entire week ago. Just when I saw how the country was siding on the issue, plus the worldwide protests. The optics were getting so bad he needs pull all kinds of the same stunts he already pulled to try to change the narrative with a smokescreen. I'd say you are probably not far off on this prediction. We both may end up looking like fortune tellers, even if his conduct is quite predictable.

[@jamesbronson12]

Trump: Nobody knows more about racism than me.

[@MaryEllenBrown]

James Bronson that’s true there’s no representation of orange people in the media he is discriminated against

[@EvilFookaire]

Not only will Trump claim to have fixed it, he'll claim that he fixed it forty years ago, but somehow that evil Obama invented racism again. Because why tell a tiny little bullshit when as a Trump it's your inbred birthright to go balls-deep on spewing bullshit.

[@krishelfferich8260]

It was a good brutality...The best brutality...I made up some karate moves myself...me and Bruce Lee...

[@Dee33636]

Ohmy God!! I love Stephen Colbert! He cracks me up, while telling it like it is.

[@generaltruefocus7694]

"Elegant Justice." Who would have thought, that the moral principle determining just conduct would be peddled like a cheap perfume.

[@UlshaRS]

Elected a guy who talks like a discount furniture salesman try to offload a warehouse of fire damaged goods as pristine and every thing he tries to sell you will sound Sofa King Amazing.

[@selalewow]

Your president creeps the hell out of the rest of the world.

[@janefisher88]

Selale Z He/It creeps the Hell out of us, too, friend. To the point we will literally vote for anyone in November. Like, literally anyone will do. #vote

[@chezmoi42]

Speaking of cheap perfume...he likes it on Rudy. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gWquoZKbfbKEbdU

[@samdowner1792]

It's because he has an expensive elegant whore for a wife

[@pablopistacio5661]

It is so ironic that in a country that claims to be " the land of the free " a memoir should be attempted to be banned . Whatever happened to the freedom of the press ?

[@debrahelmlinger6256]

They are very afraid

[@cipri198zero]

Debra Helmlinger we’re all afraid.Not only in USA,but everywhere.The media turned us into cowards,we only have the courage to fight each other.

[@sqeezyyy]

So he's basically saying nothing. All these expressions like "sweet", "tremendous" or "beautiful" don't mean anything, they are just filler words.

[@pamelamitchell9059]

Does he ever really say anything?

[@SayAhh]

It buys him time when he loses his train of thought, can't find, make out or pronounce a word on the teleprompter or just has a brain fart.

[@nmkc_auriemma]

They always have been with him

[@nmkc_auriemma]

@@SayAhh more brain fart then anything 🤣🤣

[@threelikes8128]

I recommend hydroxych... The most beautiful medicine.

[@remconoordermeer7015]

“The moustache does match the carpet.” Yeah, thanks for the horrific image, bud. How am I gonna sleep at night??

[@bboop25]

Remco Noordermeer OMG RIGHT!?! My thoughts exactly 🤮 but, brilliant humor also 😂

[@doriensutherland8893]

Stephen, seriously one of your best. You make me smile and giggle thousands of miles away. But also kinda sad.

[@IAmSuzyQ]

Let's call it what it is, an executive "suggestion", because it damn sure isn't an "order", and like most of Trump's suggestions, I doubt it'll do much good.

[@carolyntalbot947]

It just adds insult to injury; a Trump specialty.

[@MarcF.Nielssen]

Trump's orders are very often designed to hurt peoole: Think kids in cages, think withholding hurricane aid, think legalising pollution and environmental destruction, think slashing funding of social security and food stamps...

[@HaloTreatTricks]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/bmG1pXWbd5tkgqc

[@DollyTheLlama]

There's ways to get around all of those suggestions. I doubt it'll do much good either until departments figure out that they don't need armed law enforcement responding to forged bill and PI calls.

[@gillianorley]

The federal government plays no role in the operation of state and local police forces. And should play no role.

[@brooks.anderson6742]

Stephen, I hope you'll soon have Mary Trump on the show to discuss her new book about her uncle.

[@lynneanthony9172]

That's the one I want to read!!

[@jayneneewing2369]

And what about his sister who was removed from her judge’s robe? No one’s said a this about her since she was forced to step down.

[@rebeccaconklin1679]

So...if one person has another person in a chokehold, WHO'S life is at risk?? Somehow I'm thinking the chokee is at greater risk than the choker, but maybe that's just me😬

[@karliekray8290]

Mrs. Colbert is the sauciest, I love it.

[@NewMessage]

When you said "Making it creepy..." I thought he was gonna bring out Stephen Miller.

[@mymai2792]

I like your quick humour 😂😂😂

[@1firey1]

It’s okay, I thought he was gonna bring out a little tiny flag from his pocket or something and give it kisses and hugs like he did to the big flag that one time🤣😂

[@Leelz247]

Safe, beautiful, elegant justice?? "Hmmm, let's see how many adjectives in my limited vocabulary it takes for me to remember the topic I was trying to talk about." This man is going senile.

[@peacemonger766]

A trip to senility for Bunker Boy the Impeached would be a very short trip!

[@aidenmalecky7928]

I busted out laughing when he said that. He's such a ridiculous human being.

[@selalewow]

He is a creepy old man.

[@RusstheTroubadour]

What do you mean going senile ?😉

[@fatdoi003]

i can't wait to see drumpf breathing behind biden @ debates

[@ratholin]

"we need to send them more money so they can stop doing the bad thing." Isn't that called bribery and extortion?

[@coudgeb]

Right. And how much money have we thrown in that direction for training in the same things over & over & over. Training means absolutely nothing when you continue to walk out & do the same things. At this point the police force is the definition of insanity. Because they do the same thing expecting a different result. And then gaslight the public. Sorry for my rant😬

[@frostyskeletons8950]

Coudge b exactly!!

[@FunkyOrganika]

Technically it would be label as “incentives” but I see your point. We don’t need to throw more money at police for them to just do their jobs professionally.

[@jocomfiresin6982]

Sounds like extortion. Not bribery.

[@AmaniMaharet]

I’m loving Stephen’s interactions with his wife. I want a relationship like that ❤️

[@pradyutshukla7852]

Reporter : “It’s been published” Bill : “No, it hasn’t” *Stephen pulls the book out to flex on the doofus*

[@oldrrocr]

I'd buy this book but I am sure we are going to get every salacious detail from Faux "nues"

[@matthewkoch6937]

I swear, I haven't seen a more flimsy denial since I last watched "Perry Mason." This entire administration is a pack of terrible liars that I wouldn't trust to tell me the right time of day.

[@billpool1217]

Bill Barr, the picture of competence. Trying to stop a book that's already being circulated, from ever being printed.

[@thingamabob3902]

@@matthewkoch6937 I would not attribute enough competence to this administration to actually know what time of the day is

[@kathryn3950]

It’s very easy to find out that the books have been published and are already being released to the press and shows. Also, I would have loved if one of the reporters didn’t have a copy with them and just whipped it out

[@Heynove]

yo that book bomb was magnificent when he pulled it out... that right there... is stuff of legend

[@NewMessage]

Donnie's just fighting all attempts at deescalation because he's pretty sure that means he's gonna have to take the stairs.. and he's scared to death of stairs.

[@fahmizzzzzz]

Well we know he was not good going down a ramp

[@quasarnova]

@Juzek Pilsucki dude, you're the idiot. The sarcasm and joke flew way over your head.

[@Logan_Baron]

Ha ha! And juzek just accused someone else of failing reading comprehension.

[@thehellyousay]

👏👏👏👏👏

[@thehellyousay]

@Juzek Pilsucki did you hear that whooshing noise, or did the joke fly overhead too fast?

[@gregoryashton]

This has to be the BEST episode of “A Late Show” since Corona hit.

[@vintagethings9187]

Agreed! Excellent writing and delivery.

[@gregoryashton]

Vintage Things Just the way he reveals he has a copy of the book is excellent and shows what a farce Trump’s administration is.

[@vintagethings9187]

@@gregoryashton True and true!

[@jupiterhouse]

Thats what I was thinking before i scrolled down to read the comments (best show yet, in almost 3 months)

[@parivargaming7407]

When Stephen was rapping I could only image his son sitting behind the camera and covering his face 😂

[@Justanotherconsumer]

Half of the job of being dad is to make your children embarrassed on a regular basis.

[@cheezeofages]

The cop that shot that guy at Wendy's despite the fact that the situation didn't meet long established criteria for lethal force had recently got back from deescalation training. So clearly that training totally works...

[@joeboyle5864]

“Elegant Justice “...he has discovered a new word! It makes no sense in this context, but it doubles his vocabulary..

[@LadyTii]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@antarath517]

Mark it down in the Pokedex

[@rcrookster]

Yes, Biden does need help!

[@terrierqueen4091]

He just added FOUR EXISTING words to his record-skip-repeating vocabulary. You left out "safe, beautiful..."

[@boomslangCA]

I think someone changed the insert in his magic 8 ball adjective generator so he has another one to add to the current 3 (beautiful, powerful, perfect).

[@Chxrlotte]

I don’t even live in America and Stephen Colbert is the only thing making the trump administration bearable

[@fredherfst8148]

Chxrlotte ...regime

[@trixy8705]

We are happy you do not live here.

[@Kim_Miller]

And Randy Rainbow

[@bronztrooper9440]

@@trixy8705 Yeah, they're much better off living outside the US

[@melusine826]

Ditto, along with beau of the fifth column !

[@Marcus_Caius]

It's sad when a person always lose track of his rant mid-way. Imagine when it's your leader. /facepalm

[@Marcus_Caius]

@Juzek Pilsucki Who care, personally I'm not a fan of Biden. However from your reply, you also fit in that same mold with humpty trumpty.

[@lawrencedoliveiro9104]

Trump, Biden, Tweedledum, Tweedledee. In real democracies, you have a real choice of more than two political parties.

[@clearfield2009]

“I’m aware of the time, let’s take this up again at next week’s pepper spraying” omg 😱🤣😂

[@Redhunteur2]

Trump's biggest supporter is the girdle under his ill-fitting suit.

[@marymann423]

what about the bra or as Frank Costanza would sau THE MANSIER

[@UlshaRS]

He should fire that girdle, I think it might be progressive, You see how forward leaning it makes him.

[@IAmJustR]

The Girdle has a book coming out: The Night the Bottom Dropped Out.

[@bsuper63]

Trump sells girdles for men? Ill fitting suits? Both sound like something he would sell. PAB President.

[@Sharonformation]

@@UlshaRS lol so good

[@Indras25]

Colbert trolling the current Administration using Bolton's book is my favourite.

[@tomsenick2033p]

Please let this be the end of Trump.

[@blackhornet67]

4 MORE YEARS.TRUMP 2020

[@helenlowe8445]

@@blackhornet67 😂...Only if you want a KILLER/DICTATOR FOR POTUS..

[@mimsyborogove3906]

@@blackhornet67: Watch out. I have aerosol bug spray nearby. It'll work on Trump and it'll work on you.

[@robertnett9793]

No.. please not. I wish for him a long life. Long enough to endure every single lawsuit and investigation piled up against him. A long emberassing life between jail and courtroom - that's what I wish for.

[@raymondhughley575]

@@blackhornet67 YOU ARE A TRUMP TROLL ZOMBIE. NO MORE YEARS FOR TRUMP ! DUMP 🔴 TRUMP FOREVER AND BE FREE AMERICA ! VOTE BIDEN BLUE ⭕ IN NOVEMBER TO WIN !

[@RobSchofield]

The quality of commentary and humour on this channel just gets better and better.... Keep it up, Mr. C! Stay Safe, from over here in Dorset, UK.

[@IMSiegfried]

trump's rally sounds like something out of a Stephan King novel.

[@mnomadvfx]

Trump is something out of a King novel - The Dead Zone to be exact.

[@sadiestoltzfus9798]

Hardly, Stephen King hates Trump.

[@aceofspades9503]

Randall Flagg's new form?

[@cherbear1996]

@@sadiestoltzfus9798 as does over 60% of America..👍😉

[@kenbrown2808]

@@sadiestoltzfus9798 are you forgetting that Stephen King writes horror stories?

[@Lemont321989]

this keeps me sane

[@garywatt4546]

Trump needs to learn a few new adjectives. If I had a dollar for every time he’s used the word BEAUTIFUL or TREMENDOUS to describe something, I’d have enough money to be....beautifully and tremendously wealthy!

[@lynnjudd6421]

Yep if we could even get a few cents for those we could all quit our jobs and live on a beach.😁

[@broodypie2216]

North korea reports bombing the joint office as "a terrific explosion" no doubt for their glorious leader. I'm starting to see haunting parallels here.

[@bluegreenglue6565]

Can you imagine doing Mad Libs with this guy??? [facepalm]

[@NexusKin]

We need "Good Cop Tiny Cop" and "Elegant Justice" right now!

[@AbsoluteSkycaptain]

Can we keep Evelyn on set even when the show goes back to the studio? I'm gonna miss the pre-monologue banter.

[@everwhat013]

lol, i just commented about how i thought the forced banter every night was getting old.

[@JuICyBLiinGeR]

Melanie Jecker It is. There’s a schedule. Talk before the cameras roll... get on with the show. This ego crap gets on my tits. “They wanna know about us” bruh we want to know about Covid and Trumps death. That is all.

[@purplewine7362]

@@everwhat013 lol the comment you're replying to automatically implies that not everyone thinks like you

[@ffeff8353]

@@JuICyBLiinGeR -- If that's all you want, then why not watch the regular news? Or better still, read a newspaper? You seem to be in a tiny minority of a few. The rest of us watch the show BECAUSE of Stephen, not in spite of him.

[@JuICyBLiinGeR]

ffeff Because of how he delivers it. I watch because of this too. But the .. ugh never mind.

[@IAmSuzyQ]

Laundry is the only thing that should be separated by color. In this century of knowledge, being racist only proves how low in society you really are. ✊🏿✊🏽✊🏻BLACK LIVES MATTER!✊🏻✊🏽✊🏿

[@patience1888]

❤ thank u

[@bluemoon9530]

Very well said Truth Bravo!

[@HaloTreatTricks]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/bmG1pXWbd5tkgqc

[@giabarrone7422]

@itsadubsession Just not the Tide pods. The kids will eat them. Probably best to nix the bleach too....

[@forestnymphconfessions3596]

I can't even do that. But my lighter stuff either gets wine or coffee stains anyway. 🤦‍♀️❤❤

[@ronsauceify]

So instead of defunding. They increase funding, change nothing and now he has a list of people willing to go above the law. Cool...

[@hemadear2509]

You’re hilarious. Thank you for bringing in some laughter to our lives.

[@spacecadet76]

The executive order sounds more like it's protecting the police and give them more power to use force...

[@grmpEqweer]

Shh! Colbert, don't tell Trump he's risking exposure...Just let it happen.

[@lurblur11]

I swear I came here to say that! 🤩😅😅

[@frozennorthwoods4401]

@Toori Baba It's all about to be a really big problem, every last protest. All the way back to the anti-quarantine protestors. Numbers had already started back the wrong way, and now the infection and death rate is absolutely climbing once again. Just wait, were about to be in the same mess again, if not bigger this time with all the summer parties/holidays and state openings as well, before we even had a full handle on this. Just give it 2-3 weeks. Not good. I guess now we prepare for the worst and hope for the best. Sadly enough many people aren't even back to work yet from the first outbreak. Our country is about to go broke, have a new outbreak and possibly a civil war soon too. This is absolutely frightening.

[@TheBrownIsland]

@Toori Baba Most wear Masks 😷, are Not in each other's Faces talking the whole time and faced forward Outdoors marching.

[@laurenpinschannels]

he's been saying repeatedly that it's not right to wish death for Trump

[@SeansModelBuilds]

As long as his supporters leave first. Wouldn't it be amusing if no one shows up.

[@missannethrope01]

I want The Rock and Kevin Hart to star in Good Cop Tiny Cop, please.

[@phibiengama813]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@mipoorboy1478]

YAS!!!

[@fabianbarba7282]

When Stephen started rapping I cringed like a middle schooler who's dad is trying to look cool in front of your friends. Huge dad vibes. 💖

[@rayceeya8659]

Trump's "tiny bad cops" remind me of an old Hanna Barbera cartoon show called "Inch High Private Eye".

[@flukeDC4]

@Kev Walthall YES!!!!!

[@jeffperteet2327]

Great cartoon

[@RabblesTheBinx]

@Kev Walthall you didn't need so many steps. Inch High appeared in Harvey Birdman Season 2, Episode 2.

[@specialpatrolgroup92]

@Kev Walthall not there! THERE!

[@timothylacey1555]

@Kev Walthall Niicee. (love me Harvey Birdman)

[@diannacrossland4091]

Between now and November, I think it's important to refer to DJT as The Impeached President. It's a good reminder for the electorate and it would really get under IPOTUS' wig.

[@peacemonger766]

Bunker Boy The Impeached!

[@mjefferson3223]

Sounds good to me

[@sophierobinson2738]

I've been calling him mr impeached.

[@civil_villain]

I'm convinced Trump knows less than ten descriptive words.

[@KenHeslip]

That's a tremendous comment.

[@mortisCZ]

And what about deceptive ones? ;-)

[@metalcake2288]

It's all about the 80/20 principle. His target audience doesn't need more than 10 descriptive words

[@BollywoodBonanzaB]

Some would say even that's a huge number.

[@suzywilliams244]

God, I LOVE Stephen!!

[@ahorowitz15]

I know one of the producers of Fox & Friends. They tell me that everyone in production control room makes fun of them constantly while they record the show and that one of the hosts believes in nothing they say and is pretty much just there for the paycheck.

[@stefanniemiec8727]

Surely Fox is just irony and sarcasm? Does ANYBODY believe it?

[@mymai2792]

It's sad, that even though the FOX workers laugh at current govt., they are still part of the giant propaganda machine that is based on racial hate & fear mongering. There are so many viewers watching all the twisted biased news believing it to be true from Fox. These people lap up the false notion that racism is not true & black people are evil. Urged on by those messages it is these very viewers that call false reports on innocent black people that end up costing black lives at the hands of cops. You have to question anyone who works at such a corrupt organisation like Fox knowing that the end result is death.

[@petervanrillaer7184]

If this is true than it is sad that they have so little integrity that it almost becomes psychotic. They kill people with their lies, and they do it only for the pay check?????

[@jenyates3033]

Then they even worse than we think they are. Evil.

[@raymondhughley575]

@@mymai2792 FNN= FOX NEVER NEWS

[@anjulamutanda2000]

Stephen Colbert has helped me & my family get through lockdown over here in the UK. In these terrible times everywhere; fighting multiple viruses: racism, covid and politicians who frankly stink, its good to exercise our laughter muscles

[@keroloss8427]

Bill Barr's face when they tell him the book is already published 😧

[@peacemonger766]

Precious!

[@sheryls7782]

Barr looks like he is constipated crying out loud - "Oh Sh*t"!

[@bonnys3015]

And he's head of the DOJ. Wow. Just wow.

[@mnomadvfx]

@@bonnys3015 Head of the DOJ that is only acting as the presidents personal errand boy - it's pretty dire any way you slice it.

[@kolbyyates1004]

I actually snorted when you said Bolton was pointing at his only friend (mustache)

[@Opus313]

"I use the word tiny" So do the rest of us when speaking about Donnie's hands, brain and mushroom...

[@peacefulwind6559]

Orange mushroom...very poisonous.

[@sureshotsherry]

Yeah, maybe too much of the hydroxy

[@mymai2792]

😂😂😂

[@zesty9815]

1:55 It's like that time he committed to _“preserve, protect and defend what we were talking about.”_

[@sharongamble9854]

When you use a quote from Colbert's writing team-- check to make sure it's accurate.

[@223Drone]

Trump's speech encouraging police to be rough on suspects hasn't aged well.

[@Aphonydissent]

That one stunk from the moment it came out of his mouth.

[@223Drone]

@@Aphonydissent Good point.

[@ryan_n05]

Aphonydissent Fixed it for ya: That one stunk the moment it came out of his rear end that is somehow where his head should be.

[@Tina-qp7py]

Why is he even repeating it?

[@icin4d]

Remember, the cops at that event applauded that.

[@jarniwoop]

'Hat full of Rats' is a great read. Really shocking stuff.

[@eddyk3]

The only thing they’re doing RE: the John Bolton book is giving it legitimacy.

[@peacemonger766]

tRump and his cohorts do rather tend to do just about everything ass backwards.

[@tanyasampson763]

And no one should buy it because if Bolton was a man he would have exposed trump way before this book

[@spiceyhotpot]

Never liked Bolton, but I would buy this just to tick off Trump and Barr

[@tanyasampson763]

Bolton shouldn't be rewarded for waiting to speak out.

[@BigSteve_Gaming187]

Keep digging that hole Prez...

[@TheRamblinEvilMushroom]

Black Lives Matter protesters: "I can't breathe!" Trump supporters at the Tulsa rally: "I don't wanna breathe!"

[@wubdeez1601]

Thug love

[@laurenpinschannels]

@Toori Baba it's indoors. without masks. I think if those things changed it would actually be a lot better. still not great, of course. and I honestly agree it's a little hypocritical

[@SeansModelBuilds]

Republican Senators: "We don't care! You will all die!"

[@lennysmileyface]

@@laurenpinschannels Yeah and we haven't seen people without masks in any of the protests right?

[@IMSiegfried]

@aljanat5 Positive influence? Where? North Korea? Hell, not even Putin has fond words for trump! Didn't you see the massive protests in the UK when trump went there to visit? Merkel refuses to come here and Trudeau said he looks on in horror and consternation.

[@sonjaR2]

"...... puts Trump in danger too.." Oh please, oh please... allow karmic justice to take its course.

[@mipoorboy1478]

I’ve been shouting this from the rooftops! Some people have told me I’m going too far wishing this! Glad to see I’m not the only one!

[@waynedudgeon648]

we still laughing stephen, you just can't hear us.

[@magicsantos2681]

Can't wait to see how they drag him out the w.h!✊✌ The whole world will laugh so hard it will be the biggest party ever!👌👍🍾🥂🎆

[@laugesen18]

MagicSantos we’ve been laughing the last 4 years 😂😂

[@lizabuddenhagen9906]

Celebrations will occur around the world. 🎉🎈🍾🎊🕺✊🖤

[@scepts]

@@laugesen18 I'm sure some tears as well thinking of how he has nukes. Given me tears and I live in the us

[@JH-vj9zr]

can't wait😫

[@IstasPumaNevada]

I'm hoping this is in about half a year, rather than 4.5 years.

[@brianhouston5368]

"Big Johnny Walrus" as Bolton's porn star name had me dead.

[@ScevenofTwistingNeth]

My house spouse is in a meeting for work with the tech team and I almost laughed out loud like an idiot and yelled "Big Johnny Walrus"

[@GrandmaCathy]

And the pic. LOL.

[@DOUG5695]

I couldn't help but snicker and snort at your rapping, Stephen. Good job.

[@haydenlane9600]

The one thing I never get tired of are the wholesome interactions between Stephen and his wife.

[@irrefudiate]

I've never noticed this before, but Mike Pence has an affectation of trying to sound like Ted Baxter, the news anchor on the Mary Tyler Moore show.

[@TheJcfclark]

LOL. Why not? They have matching hair.

[@xanbell7723]

But he also disturbingly looks like an older crazier Christian Bale

[@dvvinever]

"We are going to pursue... [odd pause as he lifts hand towards someone in the audience] What we said... We will be pursuing it, and we will be pursuing it strongly." Said Mr. Walks Down Ramp Slowly, a.k.a Mr. Doesn't Care Enough to Remember.

[@simonrolfe294]

Have to say I'm gonna miss the adorable interactions between Stephen and Mrs Stephen when they return to the studio.

[@oldreprobate2748]

Impeach and disbar Barr. Where the is the Bar Assoc.?

[@tubruton]

When Trump made a commitment to those families, he was just being sarcastic.

[@lonerChise]

"sarcastic" .. i dunno, a bit too many letters in that word for his to understand, much less do

[@alvinchen9655]

@@lonerChise the joke was that he pretended he was sarcastic about the disinfectant comment.

[@EvilFookaire]

Trump's commitment is just locker room talk.

[@EvilFookaire]

@Juzek Pilsucki It's a bad thing for everyone that the POTUs doesn't read, period. Hitler's speeches don't count, as that little nazi nutjob invalidated his own raging monologues even well before he "inspected" his Berlin bunker complex and then when consequences came knocking, he "inspected" a gun with his mouth.

[@yaelccm4682]

Really missing Jon Batiste's genial musical contributions, especially how they perfectly intertwine with Stephen's pantomime. So effortlessly perfect, and so sorely missed... #StayHuman, #StaySafe, y'all.

[@chloekey8043]

Agreed!❤️

[@amydavis4945]

"The moustache does match the carpet!" -- some damn day I'm gonna learn not to be eating or drinking anything during your monologues.

[@sofiasky5770]

I was searching for this comment! That line made me breathe in my coffee for a moment. Very painful burst of laughter hahahaha

[@samanthab9290]

Shouldn’t take my vitamins while watching Stephen’s monologues 😬

[@meri_teri_82]

Ditto! Stephen's monologues were responsible for some of my most epic spit takes.

[@irenemesecke3076]

Me too, love sardonic humour and Stephan, his wife and team of writers are masterful.

[@michaliaholliday9569]

"Thank you, citizen." The extra tidbits to off camera family members are so delightful.