To Anyone Who Feels Like They Don't Belong

[@ColeHastings]

Thanks for all the love y'all. I figured out what I'm doing after this next house and I feel like I've gotten a lot of my optimism and ambition back. Only good things to come. Check out my patreon for exclusive content or to talk to me directly: patreon.com/colehastings

[@filipesousa1608]

Pp0pppl

[@rimuru-z4q]

A true man of wisdom !

[@mr.maurya9017]

thanks you i think it helped me .

[@spacejamgirl8182]

Idk what too do can you help me out plz

[@leowhogoestothedojo8523]

Medications go along way.

[@ted772]

Tbh what hurts the most is when you actually try to be social but you just dont make friends or people just dont wanna be friends with you as much or arent compatible with u

[@liptongtr]

This should be upvoted more. Having friends, then realizing that they dont really care about you hurts the most.

[@danityvanityinsanity]

You might be a targeted individual.

[@Evoandrs]

Maybe they dont deserve to be friends with You

[@ted772]

@@Evoandrs yea i know that and I often try to distance myself at school and tbh it sucks because there’s really no one else. Living in a small city and strict parents so not having friends at school pretty much means no other option. and then i gotta face it that i have to be alone

[@FernandoHernandez-hq8qf]

@@ted772 What hurted most in my case, was being degraded to none, I tried to interact but I was treated like if I didn't exist, like if i was invisible and muted, they literally passed from me. I can understand you mate

[@iis.1989]

''Solitude is a positive state of being alone, while loneliness is a negative state.''

[@TylerG7777]

Ooh! Good one!

[@iis.1989]

@@TylerG7777 ;-)

[@ZeRo-yc7zf]

There’s that but there’s also the fact that social interaction is healthy and in fact necessary. Find the balance in your own life, honor your family

[@yCherkashin]

There's also a perpendicular line of Boredom to Mindfulness and another perpendicular line of Ego to Yoga, and then there is the next perpendicular line of positive and negatives called Potential and Realization, and then there's the complex plane of Zen; and then...

[@mcjs8640]

Rubbish.

[@carter5325]

i just want friends who will enjoy talking to me about literally anything even if its just emotional venting all day :(

[@itsoktobehideous5507]

TRUST me I'm in the same situation. Pray God and ask him to send u one but be patient. Don't only pray him cause u need something always pray and ask him to forhive you. Bye may God send you a bestfriend one day.

[@Sam-xr8ne]

that can be a bit tiring.

[@15dusia15]

My friend, she vented and she complained all day every day and it was really tiring. I didn't have a chance to talk about me for once.

[@itsoktobehideous5507]

@@15dusia15 meditate and don't think about having friends just live life then unexpected you will eventually meet someone special.

[@alexpane3405]

I agree with everything except the venting part , you don't want that It's horrible to be searched only because they want to vent And yes is ok , but becomes tiring if the person only searches you for that and then ignores you completely

[@AhmetKaan]

*"Pain of regret is so much worse than pain of discipline."*

[@fireballdash2936]

I was thinking of this

[@jeffreyDR]

Fuck yes, im going to live mantra from now on. It's solid.

[@pikminfanclub]

No joke, I have a little note hanging on my wall to keep me motivated to train and it goes like this: "Every day you must choose between the pain of discipline and the pain of regret. It is *your* choice"

[@thepowerman8952]

Agreed, that's why I maintain disciplined isolation, despite my desires to be around people. The pain of regret after yet another round of rejection is worse.

[@meghansullivan6812]

Yeesssss

[@sidhardth7935]

What hurts more than just having no friends is actually having friends but they just don't care about you at all . You feel like being left off :(

[@maryann4105]

Ah yes, the typical "school friends". They text you for homework, you text them to get the school stuff when you were missing. But for any invitations, private conversation or any other problems, you're still just acquaintances

[@sidhardth7935]

@@maryann4105 Exactly, Idk why I can't make some real friends . When I get into a group I make the best efforts to make everyone happy but it never pays off Everyone ignores me like I did something bad :(( I'm a socially awkward teenager who loves hanging out and finding some good friends . Seems like it's never happening prolly I'm trying so hard that's why

[@maryann4105]

@@sidhardth7935 my issue is that I always expect the others to make the first move. I'm really bad at socializing and on the one hand I want friends, but on the other hand I don't want to do anything for it. It's really stressful xd

[@superherowolf2444]

I had a best friend, we did absolutely everything together, I would’ve always been there if she needed me. As we got older however she started distancing herself from me, stopped talking to me. She told me it’s because she was so, so stressed over school and just life, which okay fair, I was like that a lot as well. We started talking again, spending time and I felt good, then I realized she started not talking to me…again, no reason this time, and then I see her talking to people who I used to be friends with that she is now friends with. I’ve accepted the fact that I should probably cut my losses and move on with my life and not keep holding on to hope that one day our relationship will become what it once was again. She hasn’t tried to talk to me yet, don’t know what I’ll do if she does, probably just explain that I’m tired of feeling like the back burner friend, the one you don’t really want to talk to but no one else is around to talk to and are really bored. I think this took much longer to accepted than it should have as well, probably because I have a hard time trusting people and one of the few people I thought I could trust proved me wrong. I’m still happy for her though, I’m glad to see she has people she can laugh with and talk to.

[@sidhardth7935]

@@superherowolf2444 I'm really sorry for what you had to go through . Look you tried your best to save the relationship . You must accept that some things can't be changed , you did everything you could. Sometimes it's better to be silent and leave rather than arguing and begging for someone's attention and that's exactly what you did. Maybe someone better is waiting for you , just be patient you proved yourself to be strong! And everything happens for a reason , that's what atleast I say to myself everyday . Stay strong ❤️

[@shoot_the_glass5654]

The only thing worse than having no friends, is feeling bad about it. That part you can change.

[@itsoktobehideous5507]

TRUST me I'm in the same situation. Pray God and ask him to send u one but be patient. Don't only pray him cause u need something always pray and ask him to forgive you. Bye may God send you a bestfriend one day.

[@shelleywinters6763]

well I have no friends now because I ditched them all. They weren't working out for me. I was compromising and making do with the friends that I had, but they were more trouble than they were worth. I can talk to anyone I come across, but I pick up there's nothing there, there's nothing there for me either. People refuse to open up. I do all the work trying to get some conversation going, what I bring up, they're not interested. I try to find out what they are interested in, but they won't share. FULL STOP I'm tired of it. I give up on the real world.

[@NoctLightCloud]

@@shelleywinters6763 I feel the same way, I also ditched my friends. They started to take me for granted. I actually now think that my co-workers are a better fit for company than "friends" I choose by my own liking and will.

[@shelleywinters6763]

@@NoctLightCloud yeah. Better to go for quality than quantity. I hope one day, I may make deeper more meaningful friendships. I also have some good interactions with some co workers, at work :-) Yeah, I can relate to that, being taken for granted too.

[@Twiti47]

@@shelleywinters6763 litteraly me man... LITTERALY MD

[@reallifepsych3309]

It’s embarrassing how fast I clicked this

[@leo7107]

Fuck you made me realize that

[@Ffollies]

Same here. Well at least we all have something in common.

[@Woooweeeeee]

Don’t be embarrassed, be empowered

[@Saiarts_yt]

No worries, social jet-lag is real.

[@sahpdude]

No, not really because it shows you care enough about it. It would be embarrassing if you knew you needed it but acted like you didn't because I used to do that and now I am here. It is like the car who passes the red light only to get stopped by traffic and still end up with the group of cars who waited for the green light

[@alec3979]

I've been alone so much growing up missing out on pretty much everything. I'm left with this feeling of regret that I don't know if I'll ever get over.

[@masterrahool4774]

Same but tbh I like being alone most of the time, when I’m alone I think clearer too

[@AN-zz8ps]

I'm sorry Alec! That is a very hard feeling! :( I understand it very well I am severely autistic and can't socialize well at all but I really want to and I feel like I have missed out on pretty much everything too and I'm not sure I'm going to get over it completely as well I hope things can get better for you!

[@alec3979]

@@masterrahool4774 Yes I agree being alone most of the time is nice, but my life has been completely unbalanced towards one end and it bothers me at this point. Things could be worse though and I am trying to do things to improve my situation so it's not all bad. Hope you're doing well.

[@alec3979]

@@AN-zz8ps Thank you for the kind words! I'm sorry to hear what you're going through. I want to say believe in yourself and just focus on improving your situation day by day, little by little. A big issue I struggle with is I hate myself for being in this situation, I often have had suicidal thoughts, become very bitter, hateful, and negative. Those moods come and go though, and I sometimes feel very positive, like I realize things maybe aren't as bad as they seem and I'm doing what I can to change my situation so I must stay focused and positive rather than creating even more difficulty for myself with my self-doubt. I hope things get better for you too! I believe in you!

[@AN-zz8ps]

@@alec3979 that is good! I am sorry you sometimes hate yourself that is really hard :( You seem like a really kind caring person and you don't deserve to feel that way! suicidal thoughts aren't fun I know how that feels and hey if you ever need someone to talk to if you feel that way you can always talk to me! Like I said I'm a very awkward person and am not the best with conversation but I can try! and I am glad you can feel positive though! I really hope things can get better for you! You deserve to be happy! And thank you so much! I am going to try to improve my situation I am not completely sure yet that there's much I can do unfortunately It's such an incredibly aggressive disorder at least at the level I have it it's not for every autistic person but I ended up with a very severe case. I might end up passing away young but I am going to try some more things first and I am really hoping it doesn't come down to that. I have heard there might possibly be some treatments coming out in a few years or so for it idk for sure but it's worth waiting to see and I actually just heard sugar can inflame the brain and maybe even gluten and dairy so I will put myself on a strict diet and see if that helps at all there might be something to that actually idk for sure yet but I can actually feel the inflammation in my head and feel like I have a TON of pressure in my head so I actually AM wondering if diet really COULD be related to it somehow idk for sure but it is worth a try. You NEVER know if what you hear will actually work or not you know? but I heard diet can help with autism symptoms and also depression so we will see! I did read an article that said that the gluten that they have now days is more dangerous than the gluten that they had in the days of our grandparents time keep in mind I have NO idea if that is actually true or not just something I read but there do seem to be alot of mental diseases disorders lately so maybe gluten IS causing some of that who knows but ya the diet is worth a TRY at least! wish me luck! My brother just took dairy out of his diet and it TOTALLY cured his acne AND acid reflux it was pretty awesome so I am HOPING diet can also help with my mental issues we will see I guess.

[@cco4231]

During this pamdemic I have really craved authentic friendships.

[@NoctLightCloud]

everyone has! but at least the pandemic helps us get rid of "friends" who wouldn't even bother checking up on us once in a while to see if we are doing ok.

[@whitewolf9547]

Same with me. I’m introverted but the pandemic has put me over the edge

[@somerandomguy9125]

@@whitewolf9547 same.

[@ssyxji659]

@@whitewolf9547 same

[@michaelhardin8127]

@@whitewolf9547 Same

[@edayldrm2438]

i feel so overwhelmed by this feeling. yesterday i was with two of my 'close' friends but still i wasnt feeling very close and i didnt feel like i belong there. the most difficult part of it is the fact that they keep talking with each other about the things they both enjoy, but i am just sitting there, not engaging in the conversation, AND they feel this. i just sit there and feel like everyone's watching me and i am not 'normal'. i am 21 and i do have a lot to figure out in life and this is one of those things. thanks for the video

[@ImEmpath]

It’s okay I love you I have no friends as a matter of fact and I’m 20 years old life is hard I’m just sick of it I have no person I can relate too

[@sama2822]

I felt the same 1 month ago.....the tow of my close friends were talking to each other about things they interested in ....but for the first time in my life l felt that lam not comfortable with them and they think very far from me...but the bad thing in this story that the tow of them just give me up after that and now l ve no friends 💔

[@dmtrv.m]

hey, i’ve been feeling a similar way for a year now. sometimes not, sometimes it gets better and then it gets bad again. but overall it’s been the same. i hope you’re better now and if not you’ll be. i know how it is :(

[@thisbitchshonest7171]

I feel you 💔

[@faceless_fables]

Ive been going through the exact same thing. Had a bad few hogh school years after my family moved towns and covid just seperated me further from everyone. We will get through this, just keep putting yourself out there

[@ameliaantique5345]

I don’t have social anxiety. I can hit someone up I’ve never spoken to before and talk to them. The problem unfortunately is that I get ghosted every single time. Getting ghosted by someone you really wanna be friends with hurts man :/

[@SriCanHandle]

Same thing happened to meet again and again. I can talk to anyone, and i actually had many groups of friends. Actually I put in efforts to make people feel like home, create groups, organize activities, and a lotta times they ghosted me, went on separate tours, created own chat groups, and shit. I went to therapist to ask the reason why this keeps on happening, questioned myself a lot. Never got an answer.

[@ashuranero5721]

That sucks, i would be your friend because i had a similar problem

[@chickedee1085]

You have to keep trying, the laws of averages will find someone eventually.

[@anuragrai612]

Fuck this is so true man like why ghost me it hurts so bad feels like nobody likes or cares about you and the person you thought was important to you just suddenly says nah fuck u and goes off ND hangs out with their other friends. No matter how good a friendship I build with someone always I feel like I just don't belong, someone can replace me I'd there anyone left? Anyone who won't et close to u and just leave you. Feels bad man

[@FirstLast-ut2bk]

@@anuragrai612 omg i feel the same

[@realitycheck4746]

I don't mind being alone, but I just don't trust people at all. I don't believe there is no genuine person that will like you for who you are, but for what you can do for them. There is always a catch.

[@ChadCawleyYT]

Facts 😩😞😞

[@mindibear]

It’s human nature. If there is no benefit to them then a person will not have a desire to get involved. Try to find someone who sees your presence as a benefit in their life, or you inspire them in some way by just being yourself.

[@BuddyMac69]

Projection. I assume that you are the one who only talks to people for what they can do for you. I’m lw like this too

[@ChadCawleyYT]

@@mindibear that's a good way to look at it 👌💯

[@realitycheck4746]

@@BuddyMac69 Everyone is like this. There are no exceptions.

[@BorrachosInterdimensionales]

I have a best friend. She's beautiful, and always happy to see me and my family. She has a tail, 4 legs and soft fur. Moral of the story, get a pet

[@bridgettewhitney2615]

I have a friend that is 9 inches tall

[@edawn7615]

My best friend has blue feathers and cute cute orange beak

[@Larats03]

My cats really do help though

[@AlekNik1994]

@@Larats03 Dogs are better :)

[@soggykid5580]

That isn’t a friend though…that is a pet filling the void of a friend

[@goofydavid100]

I'm so introverted that I've had zero friends all my life but I agree im feeling lost these days kind of depressed I wish I had atleast one person to interact with

[@Ffollies]

Man, your whole life. That's rough.

[@goofydavid100]

@@Ffollies i usually never thought that it was a bad thing man but now that there is absolutely no interaction between people im feeling it a bit hard I wish everything gets back to normal so I can start to undo 24 years of mistakes

[@Ffollies]

@@goofydavid100 I'm introverted too so I kind of know how you feel. However, if you are only 24 that's great news. I'm 20 years older than you and wish I could go back in time. Just a little bit of advice from me: don't waste time accomplishing things you want. Time will fly by faster than you realize. Good luck

[@Skott-c2w]

What hobbies do you have dude? can always find like minded People in you’re passions. Just have to put yourself out there, life’s to short. 🤘🏼

[@teeaymusik9811]

@@Ffollies Hell yes brother.. You must really learn to socialize and put urself outside. I'm 32 now and i feel lonely since 10 years.. Time goes by way too fast it is what a young person rlly can't believe. I still feel young with my 32 years (and it is just a number anyways) but i know i must socialize now, finally find good friends. It is still possible also with that corona crap. Wish you all the best dont waste ur time

[@FoereaperGaming]

I have no friends and that's ok. I don't mind it. My bday was in Feburary and not a single soul remembered. I was hurt a little then I remembered that I was always been my own support. I am cutting out the people who only contact me when they need something. I've always be the "lone wolf". So I came to the conclusion that I should embrace that instead of trying to surround myself with people who dont care.

[@diemervdberg7661]

yes, doing the same. I hate those people who need you only for their needs. Embraced being a lone wolf too lol helped a bit during all those lockdowns while others were struggling after a week already that they couldn't meet others.

[@matthewdonovan6073]

I'm lone wolf it's easier!

[@FoereaperGaming]

@@diemervdberg7661 I've decided not to directly cut them out. What I have done is I tell them that i charge 40$ an hour for w.e bs they are wanting from me and the clock starts when I get in my truck. No takers yet and my phone has never been more quiet. It's nice

[@tinakaranson6964]

Happy Belated Birthday 🎂

[@cierrakae]

I’m so sorry! Breaks my heart that no one remembered your special day. Hope you are well today. Happy belated birthday!!!

[@678994A]

I keep myself as busy as possible to not feel my crippling loneliness.

[@paulofurtado81]

Feel it to heal it, the pain its going nowhere.

[@robin6728]

I feel that... only my 'busy' is a synonym for 'procrastinate'.

[@itsoktobehideous5507]

TRUST me I'm in the same situation. Pray God and ask him to send u one but be patient. Don't only pray him cause u need something always pray and ask him to forhive you. Bye may God send you a bestfriend one day.

[@nikki7287]

Same here. Spend most of my time working to death and sleeping to cope with it.

[@karmentolable]

same

[@KayKashi]

I’m in a space where everybody I love is depressed and stressed and I don’t think there is a person alive who is genuinely happy.

[@khf729]

Accurate!

[@ogvelociraptor205]

Most people fake being "Genuinely " Happy and it's a harsh reality of growing up.

[@amandabell4539]

Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness?

[@michaelmelling9333]

Your comment reminds me of something Telly Savalas opined decades ago in a magazine interview. Commenting on all of the evil going on in the world at the time, he said something like: All of this hate going on makes me wonder why anyone brings children in it. I didn't feel one way or another about Mr. Savalas at the time. But when I read where he said that I liked him a lot because he had lots of money and yet was so grounded that even he was disgusted by what he was seeing and dared to make such a remark. Just a little thing but I thought I'd share it.

[@Machelle3200]

Yeah I mean this planet is in a state of chaos..🥴🥴🥴

[@oliviapenelopehope4497]

I’ve had three “friends” my whole life (nearing 25). There were people I knew in middle school. They’ve forgotten me by now. I was always forgettable. You’ll forget me too. Everyone should.

[@xoMrsWentzxo]

I can relate, I’ve met people before and seen them again and they literally can’t remember meeting me. Guess there wasn’t much to remember!

[@kloff9405]

"The sky cries so I don't have to" Omg I know you from this one video, man I really appreciate seeing you here again :) I know it comes off as a bit weird but the fact that I was watching the other video and saw & read your comment, then saw you here again and remembered you proves a point for me! I am just a stranger, but there are real people who know you and who were or are friends with you! You are not forgettable, I would even say, that I will always have your comment back in my head :) Don't be so hard on yourself please, I do wish you the best and that you'll meet people that you can call real friends,, because that's what you really deserve :)

[@oliviapenelopehope4497]

@@kloff9405 Hi. To be honest, I use comment sections as therapy sessions. I’m a fool most often; that is just plain to see. I do what I must, and rhyme as I can. Though, this I do terribly. All rhymes aside, because of my lack of sociality, it became clear to me that I do better when I share my thoughts in some other way than speaking it. It’s almost like I don’t have direct access to my mind. I need a medium to pull those ideas into reality, and it is then that I may judge said thoughts as valuable or not. If, perchance, I cannot find the words that I should say, I fall quiet as a mouse and scurry on away. But, if I should think of a phrase that I could want to say, I share it with haste, then move along, for this is the way. Thank you for your time.

[@Muhluri]

@@oliviapenelopehope4497 maybe try to practice saying your thoughts out loud? You don’t even need to go outside to try this: just sound record yourself talking out loud to yourself

[@maryjaneeike3673]

Jesus loves each and everyone of you. Believe on him. He’s the best friend you could ever have. He will never leave or forsake you. He’s coming for his people very soon and we will all be in his presence forever. He’s always been there for me and he will do the same for you. Love you all.

[@boyka235]

Whenever I try to start a conversation, I try to sound as interesting as possible but whoever I'm talking to doesn't seem interested. Whenever the person I was talking to talks with someone else, they always seem interested. Here's how it looks like... Me: Hey, did you hear about that new movie that came out? It looks so cool I cant wait to see it. Person 1: Oh ya... I guess Person 1: Bro, did you see that trailer, the movie looks so good Person 2: IKR! I cant wait to see it

[@Veronee64]

Same man. Annoying af to witness

[@diemervdberg7661]

lol same. I learnt to remove myself from such persons after it happened too often. Not having many friends but it gives me some mental peace because I don't worry about it anymore

[@HerreDePerre]

There is one subject people love talking about the most. That is themselves. So let people talk about themselves and make be genuinely interested in them. Than you can figure out what they are interested in. Like for example Formula 1, working out, a artist or any hobby or interest that they have and like talking about. Then talk about that subject you both like. You can start talking about a cool movie but if that person isn’t friends with you or just simply doesn’t care about that movie it won’t work.

[@15dusia15]

That's how I feel nowadays... I try my hardest to engage in conversation and even if I meet someone online and start talking about their interests, they don't seem to be interested in talking about it. Why would you put it up then that you're looking for this and that if you're not even interested! And when I say something in a group of people I get the feeling that it was wrong and then comes another, says the same thing what I said, and it's praised for that.

[@faridaaali6170]

@@15dusia15 me too

[@cierrakae]

Every time I think I made a friend or a decent friend group, I find out that they secretly dislike me lol. It’s hard for me to trust now. I think I’ll stay a loner. Maybe one day I’ll have a true friendship with someone. Who knows

[@erickirwansyahputranegara451]

I can relate so hard

[@desireeadjei9033]

Same

[@desireeadjei9033]

That means you don’t belong. It used to happens to me alot.

[@cierrakae]

@@desireeadjei9033 Yeah you’re right!

[@ashuranero5721]

Does any of you guys live in berlin?

[@anapaolaoviedo7091]

Just today I was feeling so alone because I grew apart from my group of friends so they stopped inviting me to parties. Then I see this on my recommendations, you have no idea how much I need this. Thank you

[@BeautyQueenNr1]

without music i would not exist especially with days like these, where no one wants to talk to you, shit gets lonely! Let's dance and forget about the world for a minute! love the videos man!

[@SKumar-ki1yb]

I think without music i would already kill myself for a while.

[@SKumar-ki1yb]

@Handleski Exactly! All the same, I've found some specific songs in specific moments in my life and it helped me in some ways.

[@desireeadjei9033]

Exactly

[@anike15]

Same

[@aabahdjfisosososos]

@@SKumar-ki1yb Same, if I had never found my music taste, I probably would’ve done the same.

[@williamhodgson6250]

Very often in life, we have to be our own best friend. It took me over 40 years to realise and appreciate that. I’m happy, independent and resilient in my solitude and for me, that’s a good place to be. Best wishes. W

[@FirstLast-ut2bk]

im 17 but I’ve been happy being independent and go to places alone after i couldn’t make friends but what hurts me is watching people my age hang out in places with their group of friends and then there’s me going to the cinema alone i feel like i wasted my teenage years trying to find friends but couldn’t

[@PolinaM20]

@@FirstLast-ut2bk Hey, friend 👋 I’m 19, and I’ve ended up having no friends by now. I’m not as bad about it as I was before because I stopped watching such kind of videos (Hah what am I doing here, right? Well, I do my best, you see, but moments of failures are inevitable) or reading articles saying “You have to go out. Go out. Do it. Just do it”. Relax, everything is fine, you’re not dying. Don’t hide from yourself. Say to yourself: Yes, I feel lonely. And let it be. We all may get happiness from different things. It’s hard for me now to discover myself and finally get the stable emotional condition around people. So I work it out by myself. May I be wrong? Yes, of course. May this guy in the video be wrong? Yes, of course. No one knows anything. Only you may know and only about yourself. So.. Live this life the way it fucking works out for you only. It doesn’t work out for anyone else, accept it. Cinema, alone? Good, listen to the podcast while going there, take a picture, send to your mom. Problems with mum? Fuck it, send it to dad, grandad. Again no? Again fuck it. Smile to the guy or girl who works there. Make a compliment. Don’t want to, too afraid? Fuck it, next time. Eat something delicious while going back. Again no? Again fuck it. You know, you can take a toy from your childhood to the cinema. Who cares? You can help someone or pay for someone’s popcorn while standing in the queue. Don’t wanna do that? Don’t do that. Again, in both situations that’s completely fine. You have to get what works out for you. You don’t need any approval. You need courage. Yep, you need this one. But if you don’t have it-that’s good. I don’t have it, for example. And who cares? 🤷🏼‍♀️ Do I wanna one? Yes, but for now it is what it is. I’m ok with that . You can do something or not. But never blame yourself, never blame anyone. Smile, person🙂

[@catherinewylie6959]

I love this. I am using solitude to get my life more organized and functional by working towards long-standing goals. I'm in my 50s and refuse to be bothered by my years long flakey friendships. Anyway, this is just so great. Thanks.

[@kloff9405]

I can't stop screenshoting these comments, I relate too much help

[@itsoktobehideous5507]

TRUST me I'm in the same situation. Pray God and ask him to send u one but be patient. Don't only pray him cause u need something always pray and ask him to forhive you. Bye may God send you a bestfriend one day.

[@i_observe9846]

@@itsoktobehideous5507 stop spamming

[@trinity6880]

oh, me too..

[@Justafew4U]

Finding that small community that fits you is hard, finding friends true friends are impossible.

[@rodelscreation]

True 💯

[@Bruno-gl9oz]

The hardest part it's see on social media how people looks like they have a bunch of friends , they date , work, are beautiful , and all I do it's to be alone in my parents house in my room... I feel likes everyone accomplished their goals while I'm a fucking freak looser

[@i_observe9846]

@@Bruno-gl9oz same

[@ashuranero5721]

@@Bruno-gl9oz Many of them very likely pretend

[@tuneunleashed]

@@Bruno-gl9oz Don’t believe any shit you see at times.

[@brauber2867]

How funny that 4 months after my break-up you posted the getting through a break-up and now that I don't have my ex as one of my best friends and watch a lot of videos justifying going in solitude because it feels like I have no other option, you post this. We are around the same age and going through the same things. We don't know eachother but it still feels like you are my friend going through the same stuff and that honestly makes me feel part of something.

[@ColeHastings]

You're never alone my friend. Some day I'll host a meet up somewhere and we can all chill

[@mjjj4067]

I am in pretty much the same situation as you, hope it gets better for you

[@lucch03]

I’m in pretty much the same situation too. We’ll get thru it 💪🏻

[@Gillian_FFXIV]

Same here. Stay strong, Kings.

[@Sabrin_Elan]

I'm a black woman and feel the same. As far as my archetype, I feel authentically myself; a blend of my experiences and passions. I grew up in San Diego in an ethnically diverse environment but it was layered with religious trauma and monolithic expectations. I grew up loving science, nature, cooking, writing, practicing Tae Kwon Do and Piano and Viola. I always desired more community and connection with girls who looked like me. When my parents divorced when I was 14, the only change I looked forward to in moving to the South was being able to have more black friends. Bless my heart. I had the exact opposite experience and since that day, I have not fit in anywhere in the South or majority Black environments. I pledged a black sorority at PWIC and didn't fit in with the chapter and wasn't white or interested enough to be part of elitist academia. Black CULTure in the West is predominated by group think and doesn't have much grace for individuality. I think this culture is artificially engineered and doesn't reflect the diversity of thought and expression across our diaspora. As a black woman, it seems there are only a few acceptable characters that are validated and celebrated in Western culture : video/city girl, strong liberal independent or corporate boss, or "welfare queen." These are the images in media and those that people recognize and accept. As I've grown to see myself more clearly and cherish my uniqueness, I long for spaces that cherish femininity in all its expressions and dynamics : sensitivity, creativity, flow, empathy, gentleness, emotional intelligence, communication, affection, devotion, sweetness, expressiveness, modesty and supportiveness. Western culture continues to move further away from the true essence of woman and manhood, thus, for now, I will be in nature.

[@leo7107]

I'm pretty sure he will probably not see this comment among all these comments but I just wanna put it out there. This video means a lot. I had a 2 weeks vacation and I spent the whole thing totally alone. I have been mainly working out to keep me occupied. But I still had moments of realization that I'm totally fucking alone. I have mainly made friends with my classmates my whole life but none of them really stuck. This year I can't relate a single bit with any of my classmates and most days I don't talk to anyone in school, which I know is my fault. I have a language barrier problem and putting that much effort into talking in different language with people that I'm not interested in is too much for me. This video has at least made me feel like I'm not alone at being alone.

[@ColeHastings]

Very glad i could help my friend

[@amandabell4539]

What is your native language?

[@alexpane3405]

I totally understand you Same Really hope can find somebody :")

[@leo7107]

@@alexpane3405 I actually did. Your reply made me realize how I was 6 months ago. Now I'm in a much better state. I guess things does get better sometimes.

[@alexpane3405]

@@leo7107 wow , that's great! I feel happy for you :"D/

[@remyazharyyosef1811]

Definitely me! At this point, I'm ready to live in my own planet in a distant galaxy out there....like literally.

[@michaelmelling9333]

I suspect lots of folks would like to do the same.

[@adamsnotebook850]

You choose the life you live. If you don’t like it, it’s on you to change it because no one else is going to do it for you.

[@andrewrodriguez7727]

What if you genuinely have trouble applying for jobs online/ trying to apply for college?? And need a lil assistance?!

[@adamsnotebook850]

@@andrewrodriguez7727 I’m having the same problem bro, don’t worry we’ll get through this, keep applying, don’t give up, just give yourself a goal for example, apply for 1000 jobs or colleges, and some of them will give you an offer or scholarship.

[@aydanscott9871]

It’s so hard to change

[@Alexin3D]

I'd say it's more like you to find the way to change and commit to it. If you get help along the way that's fine and actually a much more efficient way.

[@annevries8572]

You are part right but part wrong.Because happiness has also come from the inside.But I miss things like money and love.Sometimes it is not that easy

[@atsuyak768]

yes exactly. I feel so alone as if nobody irl around me are searching for deep rooted authentic friendships... a true strong, genuine bond. And I know it takes time but I feel like I'm surrounded by superficial or conditional friendships

[@jailizcordero703]

i feel the same way!!! message me

[@thomasparg1981]

"Humans are social creatures." Heard it so many times. I must not be a human then. Can I just have peace and be on my own?

[@superherowolf2444]

Hard agree

[@frfrllll]

You should to admit that if you clicked on this video you do need some social interection. And it's OK, it's not a weakness, it's a natural need all humans have

[@oshawott5308]

my mentality towards people will always be unwavering, in kindness, tolerance, and forgiveness. keeping it is a sign of my own mental strength and rising above what garbage situation I don't bore people with. ...but it's disheartening to still feel, and rightly so that I don't mean anything significant to anyone yet, despite giving so much and asking (and receiving) nothing in return with no anger or sadness from it.

[@jasonwhite7452]

Now that everyone is stuck in the digital world,I don’t think authentic friendships exist anymore. But to the person reading this..You’re no less important! You are an awesome person living in some crazy time! You’re not alone! We are all going through this!

[@Dzanarika1]

Thank you, Jason, for being honest and encouraging.

[@jasonwhite7452]

@@Dzanarika1 You’re welcome! Hope you’re doing ok!

[@TheMellizification]

I'd like to have more spiritual friends that are creative and introspective 🌱

[@itsoktobehideous5507]

TRUST me I'm in the same situation. Pray God and ask him to send u one but be patient. Don't only pray him cause u need something always pray and ask him to forhive you. Bye may God send you a bestfriend one day.

[@kelseyc3721]

Same here! Let’s be friends :)

[@bettersounds1926]

👋

[@thehypest6118]

Right?? I'm so sick of people with literally zero hobbies, zero personality outside of Cooke cutter npc crap

[@earwiq]

It seems not many people like talking deeply nowadays...Unfortunate.

[@yadi4410]

i use to be an extrovert however i became more of an outgoing introvert. finally happy with being by myself but i still maintain the friends that are truly close to me

[@augustin19tube]

I don’t know if this boi and me just be vibing the same vibe but I appreciate the external thought on the same situation Take care of yourself brothers

[@ColeHastings]

I can feel the vibes

[@LGRM-e6d]

As an introverted black guy I’m an outcast for sure all my life. Our culture promotes loud, aggressive, brash type of confidence. I’ve grown to love and appreciate my self.

[@caleaburnam8207]

This 💯☹️ especially in the game of spades…and then looked down on for not knowing how to play well,it sucks…

[@Acord718]

Same here I am a "nuyorican Boricua". Our culture is very similar especially the hood and tough guy mentality. I don't fit in because I am and don't act like that. In understand where you are coming from.

[@Mistahbt433]

Bruh! I don’t fit in anywhere… for the reasons you just mentioned… still pushing tho

[@DanzyRemix]

Only child black dude that has no friends. Suffering from loneliness but no I know is my age and I had to lose 90% becuase they kept making black jokes over the year and didn't care I how I feel. So I've been alone for like a month and it's been very lonely to neve talk to a soul. I hate when they say "your my best friend" then proceeds to hang with there other friends forgetting that you exist.

[@justinwinn01]

Yeah

[@Crazymexicano214]

i lived in texas, usa for my entire life. (21 years) and was deported and separated from my family, friends and pretty much stripped of the life i had. this whole transition was during the pandemic as well, although i am born in mexico and am currently living in the town i was born, i feel like i am in a foreign country most times. i know the language but not much else and people notice. i felt awful for a while but eventually realized i am blessed to be in the situation i am in. i was comfortable in america and not growing in fact i was dying and oblivious or didnt care. i got a new start. i held tight and made it through the obsticles, rather i got used to them so they stopped being obsticles. and i discovered whatever this is, the WILL, i would say. to push forward, to sacrifice for a greater cause. this unlimited strength to keep improving. the desire to be better. there is only 1 quote that truly resonates with me and i hope it helps, if not thanks for reading; ¨all's well that ends well¨. no matter what circumstance, dont lose the will to live. cheers from mexico. hope you guys are living it up.

[@karlvonbahnhof6594]

Man, I'm 47, I've started to experience negative thoughts last year, for the first time in my life, felt like nothing makes sense anymore, my life goes nowhere, started misuse drugs like alcohol and weed, which made it even worse, lost people I've cared about which led to deeper anxiety and more drug misuse, thank universe (I was about to say God but as non believer it just doesn't make sense) I've discovered Eckhart Tolle, Alan Watts and You, this gave me hope, I can actually change things, I'm not really ok yet, but you guys are changing perspective on my life and thanks to You, Cole Hastings, not Alan Watts or Eckhart Tolle, I've started to take cold showers, keep doing what you doing, I appreciate your work, the universe needs you 💖

[@Froglet1968]

Thank you for sharing so openly. The last two years have been the most stressful and painful for many haven't the? We are not meant to be isolated and buried too much inside our own thoughts. I miss having routine and closeness. At 53 I feel rather lost thanks to the pandemic and having to shield, etc...you hang on in there, I admire your honesty. Please do keep trying to get clean, one day, you will go one to help others and find your place in the world...hang on in there.

[@sydneyjacobson9833]

Thanks for sharing this. I’ve never had a friend group in my life, and I’ve been entirely friendless for almost 2 years now. I love the freedom that independence gives me but i also acknowledge that my loneliness is a hindrance to my success. I’m actively trying to work on putting myself out there to develop rich and authentic relationships. Have a good weekend cole 💗

[@KeryllQuibido]

This is what I feel whenever I am at school. This happens in my entire school years. I have always been struggling to make friends because I am not like my classmates, and we don't have the same interests. Some of them think I am weird and stupid. So it is very hard for me whenever my teacher requires me to find a partner or group mates. It's a terrible feeling when my teacher puts me in a group, where all the members in it are clearly friends with each other, and I have this unpleasant feeling that they don't want me in their group based on their reaction. It made me feel bad about myself. It made me believe that I am a worthless person just because someone treats me poorly. As I got to know myself better, I realized that how people treat me is not a reflection of my value and worth. I also realized that I was just in the wrong environment, and that those people are not meant for me. I am grateful to finally learn that my intuition is not meant to hurt me. It is meant to protect me, and to let me know who or what is truly meant for me.

[@firkalali5302]

I'm my own best friend. I am happiest when I'm alone. Don't mistake solitude for loneliness. It's two different things.

[@DarthMessias]

Lol, what does that have to do with the point of the video...? xD

[@EmieC-v8s]

This. I always tell myself: when you’re alone, the only person to judge yourself is you and your thoughts. Nobody is picking on your identity and making you feel ashamed of it just because they think it’s super “weird”.

[@lynako2546]

human connection is vital to our health, ive been suffering my whole life bc i never belonged

[@jessloveshomemaking]

Totally can relate to this.. since I was a kid I never fit in bc I couldn’t connect over surface level things.. I craved deeper connections over things that were more thought provoking and curious. I have my family so I am lucky to have them as a support group but other than that I’m quite the lone wolf hah I enjoyed this video, thanks for posting!

[@freddiejames2083]

The way I fight against all of this is having passion for things I love. I know it's easier said than done,but they do help me to turn all of this negative energy into a positive when I'm feeling hopeless about life. I talk about turning negative into a positive all the time,this stuff really does work.

[@lizzzzzzzzzzz6095]

The worst part is having a circle of friends you've been with for ages but you still feel lonely. Unless I'm funny or interesting you can sense the other person shifting gaze looking for an excuse to leave. It's all surface level.

[@simonpajarillaga2501]

For my case, I always fear the thought of making friends. People would always criticise me that "You should break out of your shell and make some friends!" But that's not why I fear them. My main fear is that whenever I would try to make friends with others or the opposite holds true, there is always an ulterior motive. And that motive is essentially using me for academic gain, money gain etc. You see, I'm a nerdy person who is often motivated and capable of handling tasks, even tasks that involve being social. And for a teenager, lots of people found me weird and a majority of people always see me as something they can really extort or take advantage of. This scenario has happened so many times that eventually I just started acting cold and as a defence mechanism, I push others away, even those who are being genuine as well as those who want to help. And for other issues, it always seemed like I should become similar to them, (becoming a delinquent, and stuff like that) and it ruins my integrity as a person. I cannot force myself to like what they like and due to that, I'm ostricised.

[@cali5995]

I hadn't thought about community through the Internet as real community -- I appreciate that. I do think there is a need for physical touch in addition to this, but this is helpful. Thanks.

[@ColeHastings]

For sure, physical interaction can't be replaced. But online communities can help

[@Andromantica]

People think that I’m special cuz I’m not like the others , that’s why “the others” hate me so much , i was mocked and excluded my entire life , being alone is all i have left

[@Andromantica]

@@eduardochavacano i know , and I appreciate feeling superior sometimes , but being alone sucks really , I remember wishing to fit in and be like everyone , that was very desperate of me but it’s very hard like this , although I’ve realized my place in my society and have learned to appreciate it and be myself

[@tiarailic4086]

I have trust issues. I do not want to connect to most people on a deeper level because I dont want the pain, judgment or pressure that often follows. I got people telling me I'm "not progressing" and it hurts because I don't feel like such a failure. I've done a heck of a lot with myself and I wish people could see that. I don't hate people, but I dont see friends as the ultimate solution to my life. I want freedom more than anything.

[@antidepresan3394]

You re sigma person maybe. You can search it.

[@uncleyogie4698]

Stay strong

[@theblues_12]

Relatable

[@soniacorredera8116]

I have been on my own for so long, I feel really lonely and with no support whatsoever, I think you are really good, intelligent, sincere, I wish I were like you. I will watch your channel in order to get better. Thanks, Sonia.

[@Evan-yl4rs]

Friends, community, and relationships are important no doubt but they do require energy, time, and effort. I'm going through a period of solitude myself right now. I think its critically important to have periods of life when your not entangled in relationships. It gives you time to really work on yourself.

[@d_teex09x44]

Loneliness and lacking belonging is one of the most crippling feelings I've had most or all of my life. So it's very reassuring knowing I'm not alone.

[@melvin-fitnessproductrevie7082]

Great video. As important it is to know how to be alone, it's just as important to have social interaction. When quarantine started, I had no face-to-face interaction with a human for an entire month since I live alone. I never realized how much of a mental impact it would have on me. It made me depressed and I questioned my existence. Success is great - but not as great if you have no people to share it with.

[@Kianfox]

Just gonna be super open in the comments section rn. I'm like borderline having a crisis in my 20s. I feel like I lost all my friends, I hate where I live, I don't really have any support system. I've been wanting to move to LA to start over, new friends, new job, new place, and this video scared me. It's scary that it actually might just be me. It's definitely me. It's scary that like you, I can go to cali, and nothing can change. I really just don't want to turn in to someone who works, eats, sleeps, and has nothing to look forward to. I feel like I need to run away, and idek where or why. I just have to go. I just want to start over cause I'm having such a hard time picking up the pieces here. Idk if that's just crazy or if that's valid, I really don't know.

[@bridgettewhitney2615]

I m really sorry you feel that way. I m sure one day it will get better. I would recommend going to a therapist because they dive into what you feel.

[@TimMaloneyNMactor]

some how things just change , you`ll find your way . I don`t think "it`s you" , a lot of people feel this way now . be kind to yourself . L.A. is not a good idea . you`ll feel even more lost ( unless you have family there ) . work out , go on power walks . eat smart . sleep well . it will open up for you . peace to you .

[@Kianfox]

@@TimMaloneyNMactor thank you friend.

[@Kianfox]

@@bridgettewhitney2615 I probably should sort out why I want to leave. I appreciate the advice.

[@melaniem.3804]

i moved across my state for my first time moving out and...my "friends" from back in my hometown just eventually vanished. no one checked up on me to see how i was doing while moving. no one congratulated me for moving out either. not even family members, nor cousins. i also have literally have zero support here in the new place i moved too, still haven't made a meaningful friendship the past 9 months here...kinda sad.

[@WhirlOmar]

When I was going through this in my adolescence I did not have KZbin to see that others were going to the same. And maybe what to do about it. It would’ve helped greatly. All those going through it now consider yourselves lucky to have KZbin.

[@woodythecow73]

I really relate to not belonging in this world. I have a mental disorder that puts people off. They just don't want to be around me

[@erwincagampan5777]

I’m so sorry to hear that. It must be hard for you. Be strong

[@montesa9136]

@woody thecow - I'm the same. I suffer from Major Depression. People don't want anything to do with me ....

[@ashleyyg3542]

@@montesa9136 I wanna be your friend

[@montesa9136]

@@ashleyyg3542 @Ashley yg - Yeah? Sounds good. How do we chat?

[@ashleyyg3542]

@@montesa9136 sounds good,,are you on IG, Snapchat or whatsapp any can workk yk

[@Wolfie-Echo]

I’m a cosplayer used to do gacha I’m very undo project sekai and stuff like I’ve always been shunned from my schools and made fun of but recently I finally found somone who was pretty much into the same things I’m into and life has become so much better with just that one person ! There will be somone out there for you no matter what you like or who you are

[@BriannasPlanet]

It’ sucks because I don’t even have social anxiety but making a close group of friends you trust is hard to come by. I feel like I invested all my time before covid to make friends and then it all went to waste. The friends that did stay around were very toxic and I had to cut myself off from them. I feel like there’s no point in making friends because they don’t last or they take advantage of you. It honestly makes me very depressed 😕

[@tk-fo2yr]

I strongly relate to you. It's tough to find good friends whom you can trust and with whom you have a click :/ There's an article with tips about how to make real friends. Maybe it helps you: www.jw.org/en/library/magazines/awake-no1-2016-february/make-true-friendships/ The best to you 🙂

[@NoctLightCloud]

my mom (she's 63) says that there are no true friends. My sister (age 40) says the same. I am 26 now, and I am beginning to agree with them slowly...

[@blackbat121]

me too 5 years at university ! I had been trying to make friendship but non of them worked .. and now I don’t give a fuck about making friends. I’m tired.

[@callmeluna07]

I had social anxiety before, no friends, now I got rid of ‘em, still no friends. Now I finally know what the problem is. Heard a KZbinr said social anxiety doesn’t come from nonsense thoughts in your head or chemicals,,.. it’s caused by bad social experiences with others, makes sense.

[@JRob594]

It's hard to trust anybody nowadays since losing my parents I feel like it's me against the world

[@Froglet1968]

How are you doing? Hang on in there.

[@CenterBlackWomensMentalHealth]

I feel this to my core.

[@mrbred-el3vf]

i think my problem is that i don't have confidence on myself. i often feel inferior from other people, like if they were superior than me, and that limits me a lot. anyone else feels the same?:(

[@antidepresan3394]

Sometimes, if you re a man do nofap, exercise , breath, meditate , get a job it helps.

[@mrbred-el3vf]

@@antidepresan3394 of course, i'm doing all that. also, i'm practicing stopping being ashamed of myself and being a better person, that really helps too !! thank you btw :)

[@antidepresan3394]

@@mrbred-el3vf no matter bro:))

[@melindasmith3713]

Same

[@rome316ae3]

It feels good to be alone when nobody is around. But it sucks being alone when everyone is around

[@justanothermortal1373]

It is kind of comforting to know that this comment section is one of the few places I can belong :)

[@Bruno-gl9oz]

True... It's comforting to see all thes comments and see that's not only me that feel like that

[@philipp3001]

I have been in the same apartment for 2 years and I always say hi to my neighbors in front of me (the only apartment in the hallway) and last week when I was walking my dog back to the apartment my neighbor was clearly annoyed at us because my dog who is really old was walking really slow and she asked me to rush like asking me too get out of the way and she asked me if I even lived there 😒 after 2 years so she never even payed attention to her only neighbor

[@misseccentrica]

This is so sad... I feel sorry for her,she must be very empty from the inside 😕 sending kisses to your dog 🐕 😘

[@MoltenMetalGod7]

That's people for you now a days.. They're super self absorbed always in their online world on their phone but they still expect you to give a $hit meanwhile they don't even acknowledge you exist. That is of course until they need something... Good for you for at least trying to be friendly/neighborly too bad a lot of people just don't reciprocate these days.

[@NoctLightCloud]

maybe she is senile? Also some people don't memorize faces at all. Benefit of the doubt?:'(

[@amandabell4539]

Geez

[@Dzanarika1]

The slow walking with your dog would annoy me too, just being authentic 😊

[@BrendanTripp]

(sigh) ... I'm 66 and for at least the past 40 years it's been impossible to relate with humans at all. Every time I try to reach out to people, I get my heart run through a grinder.

[@EB-gt1pq]

I’m sorry… me too. I’m just crying my eyes out over fact that I have absolutely no friends and nobody likes me. And everybody hurts me.

[@curiouskitty7972]

Sadly, I can relate. Turned 66 in January... So much betrayal. Seems to get worse as we age

[@maryannbaretta1989]

Hi people I understand I have no family and friend and never had ..the people who I thought were friends are just users so I'd rather be alone I relate with you Cole and everyone here thank you for your honesty❤

[@diegojdavi]

As an introvert myself, I can totally relate. Like, I'd rather spend about 75% of my time on my own. After this time, I really miss interaction. On the flip side tho, I find it hard to go up to people and strike up a conversation, especially if it's small talk, which I tend to despise. In my relations, finding people with whom I can have meaningful conversations and connect to them in a deeper level is key. Anyways, I should put myself out there as you said. Peace!

[@keidanekeith668]

Quite similar to me , I can't approach people and start a conversation. I usually wait for others to then I also talk. I'm not the worst to talk to but definitely not the best

[@diegojdavi]

@@psyche..1111 I really appreciate your comments. Have a great one! ✌️

[@MoltenMetalGod7]

As an introvert I struggled with this a lot particularly not wanting to put in effort with people. For me it started in high school and continued through college and graduate school. I completely ignored/avoided everyone. I think it definitely led to some missed opportunities professionally as I found myself age 26 and knew almost NO ONE. What I found as a middle ground was start off trying to meet people for business if it turns into golf or hanging out great if not at least you can socialize a bit over professional things in common and make some professional connections. As an introvert the struggle is getting yourself to go in the first place lol.

[@LoneLionLeo]

Oh boy those who end up becoming your friends will be so lucky

[@itsoktobehideous5507]

TRUST me I'm in the same situation. Pray God and ask him to send u one but be patient. Don't only pray him cause u need something always pray and ask him to forhive you. Bye may God send you a bestfriend one day.

[@palkia423]

Idk why but I really found your channel when I needed it the most even though it's only been a few days since so thank you very much for all the stuff you do. Where I live we're in lockdown for months now which gave me a lot of time to reflect on myself and your vids have really helped me out to expose some of the things I need to work on. I'm leaning more towards the introvert side unless I'm in an area where I feel comfortable enough. The thing is not particularly that I don't feel like I don't belong but I can feel that I haven't seen people for too long. Even before lockdown I didn't see my friends often because I only have a few and most of them don't live too close. I usually go to the gym 5 times a week which was almost the only human interaction I had with strangers but this government decided to close the gyms as well which means that sometimes I don't even go outside for an entire week. I know it's not good but this is really starting to drain my power, motivation and overall happiness and I don't know how to really get out of it.

[@grimlake07]

I feel this, a lot. Just finished my Army contract, went back to my hometown, & all the people I know moved away 😬

[@zachaep7]

Ive never had a best friend, until I rescued a female kitten from the street, I raised her but my parents started complaining about her mess and food, so they sent her away to an animal breeder, she was my only bestfriend, whenever Im down or upset she licks my nose, there are times where I feel like she understands me. My parents are harsh on me no matter what im going through at school or at home. I suffer of loneliness and depression, my grades are lower than they have ever been, I fail to complete daily tasks and I lack taking care of myself/hygiene Im trying to find her because whenever I go to the animal breeder she is not there, im not going to give up.

[@H0rHe]

For so long I was stuck in a toxic friend circle because I was stuck between leaving them and releasing the pain or staying so I won't be alone, now I have 3 friends (not part of the former circle) and I am the happiest I've ever been, it's also contributed to bettering myself because of working out and eating right, it's about releasing the emotional stress and pain using exercise as well as cold showers, for me those things helped my depression and anxiety but it might be different for the rest of people. Either way, great video!

[@silentgamer88]

I was bullied since elementary school. I developed social anxiety throughout high school, I didn’t have any friends. I didn’t know how to make one. Now I’m in college and almost all my courses have mandatory group work. Last Wednesday, I had trouble finding a group for class activity and my lecturer told me to stay back after class to talk to her. She blamed me for not being able to find a group and all the bullshit about: “It’s not discrimination. It’s about contribution” along with: “You won’t be able to survive society by doing work alone.” Oh, I’m so sorry that it’s my fault the class can’t accept me. It’s my fault for not integrating into society.😒

[@neasahayes6044]

Your teacher is a fool and a coward. Silly rude cow.

[@antrant7533]

Dude, this is the way I have felt every single day of my life. But now I know, and intend to improve my social community!

[@jairodavemejia4057]

I was amazed while watching this, what you talked about in this video were all on point with my current situation. This is life changing, i mean the realization is clear now. thanks man!

[@PaulFerguson-t2x]

I feel like that all the time, it's because we are special.😊

[@nukuur5919]

I had a terrible mental breakdown today about being alone and this video was so perfect timing. thank you

[@ivel17]

You are not alone man

[@Anne-bb3wp]

@@ivel17 you are alone 😆

[@ivel17]

@@Anne-bb3wp sad but true

[@fisayoabiona3751]

I had mine this morning and I came across this video 🥲

[@maxhuppertz1921]

Your channel is way to underrated for this quality of videos. Keep up that great quality and deep realtalk, I am really enjoying it!

[@TKZells16]

I asked my sister how to make friends this year and she told me “just let it happen naturally, eventually you’ll make connections “ Except it doesn’t happen naturally for me,someone who has trouble socializing and keeping friends. If I don’t actively work to move past my insecurities and social anxiety then “naturally “ I will stay in the same situation

[@swabby429]

Cold approaches have worked--to connect me with a lot of narcissistic folks.

[@antidepresan3394]

What is cold approach

[@danny8930]

I didn’t want to click on this right away Cole because I’m a little afraid of facing the truth 🥺

[@leticiabranco5111]

I've always felt like I had never belong. Not even when I'm with my closest friends! But now in the pandemics, this felling is stronger. I feel like i don't even belong around my family, the people who I love the most! But I know this is going to pass, and some how, i feel glad to find out that I'm not the only one going trough this. Everything it's gonna be alright!

[@eduardoignacioroblessosa6349]

me too, I also feel like I don't belong even with my family, We just have to enjoy ourselves I guess

[@TakeBackYourMind997]

The beauty of cold approach is the world is SO abundant that you literally have an endless supply of people to test & train your skills on. People that it doesn't matter in the slightest if you make a total tit of yourself to. Then you have the skills to go meet the people that do actually mean something to you & you really want to connect with, and even if you fuck that up, there's more of them too!!

[@antidepresan3394]

I heard this cold approach term before but what is that mean i dont know.

[@TakeBackYourMind997]

@@antidepresan3394 It basically just means approaching someone you don't know, the fact you don't know them makes it a cold approach.

[@billdiaz8390]

I like this video because you are giving good advice which I agree with. Because of the pandemic, you are not the only one feeling the way you do. Many other people are feeling the same way. You have to go out there and spend some time with other people. Remember, if you are shy, you are not alone. There are other people who will be shy as well. Having a community will help you learn skills that you already have or will learn and become a better you to yourself and to others. I hope everyone who will see this video, may God bless you and protect you. In life, we all have our moments when we feel down for whatever reason. I believe in these moments, the best is yet to come out. When I look at life, not everything that looks bad is bad. It depends on how we look at life and how we react to what has happened that makes the difference. My strength comes from my family, true friends, and most of all God. You need to find that strength. I was brought up in a religious home but I investigate what I believe. I notice the people I am around and who I can trust. Without God and my family and true friends, I would not be who I am. Thank you for this video.

[@saintperthnorthcloud3850]

Having no friends and communication at all is such a huge relief in my case. I enjoy quiet and alone time with myself and i don't really care much about that fvcking sense of "belongingness".

[@momomirzoph9485]

I isolated myself from my friends like 2 years ago had the same feeling for the first a few months It took me a year and a half to realize how freaking depressed I've gotten I had serious problems but no one to discuss em with Cool and interesting achievements but no one to show em to I personally regret ignoring my friends now that I need them the most Maybe you're different Or maybe if u keep it that way you'll end up the same

[@saintperthnorthcloud3850]

@@momomirzoph9485 nah i love the feeling of being alone and isolated. To be honest i don't like the feeling of being ask how am i doing by anyone even my old friends and family. Maybe it's just me who finds a sense of comfort by being alone. It's just how my mindset works and i am completely happy about it. Hahaha

[@saintperthnorthcloud3850]

@@momomirzoph9485 it's just a matter on how you handle your mental state and well being. Stop overthinking and just focus on things that matters to you. Love yourself

[@NoctLightCloud]

trust me, it will eventually get you. I haven't really met nor chatted with my friends for 14 months, and 2 weeks ago I cried 5 days straight, randomly for no reason. It will hit you, and it will hit you hard. I still don't think it's depression, cause I otherwise had no commonly known signs of depression. I think it was just my heart being fed up with being alone. Cause I was otherwise super chatty, friendly, motivated, productive, and actively looking for a job. But having lost my friends really made me cry like a baby.

[@robertbeining141]

Thanks Cole. Excellent content and always important to share. There are many of us that feel this way and go through these events in life . . . but it is so nourishing and healing to know we are not alone in this journey. Stay Strong, Be Well, and Please keep the content and experience sharing coming.

[@AhmetKaan]

"The difference between average people and achieving people is their perception of and response to failure." *― John C. Maxwell* Failures are the only way to success.

[@borisleoro8943]

Thx for this quote bro

[@arthurpenfield8229]

I think there is a much worse problem when you're surrounded by people that make you feel alone.

[@joncooksey1]

The truth is I hate people and just want to be left alone. period.

[@HuyLe-vo4pg]

Is that really so? Why are you watching this video then no disrespect

[@iwnunn7999]

I'm almost with you. People are generally not human beings. They're egos who are superficially connected. I can't deal.

[@lazsubbz]

Same but I go back and forth hating everyone to needing everyone 😥

[@rukeyburg1084]

So do you hate yourself too or is that different? I just think it feels ironic when people say those things. If you want to be left alone, are there people who are way too curious about you?

[@blueprince2330]

That's where I'm at too, bud. My ex-wife had an affair, lied about it for 2 years while she pretended we were reconciling our marriage, and ultimately left me and took my 2 sons with her. If the one person on this planet who was supposed to love me until death, can treat me like that....then I have no time for anyone else.

[@lukaschrimlis8720]

I swear dude, something comes up in my life and then you come up with video exactly addressing the problem. Your very good, dont stop.

[@kaushikdr]

If I could suggest one modification to your advice, if you haven’t been talking to people at all, then going up and talking to pure strangers is probably not the best way to start. I actually used to go up and talk to strangers all the time in college and I did make some friends that I still talk to to this day. But the authentic relationships I built started with genuine curiosity - for example, I talked to this guy I saw unicycling around campus because I actually wanted to know how he did it. So maybe you can find a group of people doing something you enjoy (like a running club or some group on Meet-up) and ask questions about the mutual hobby you share! It is also key to remember that the key to conversation and improv is to accept and build - try to add something to what the other person said. Good luck to everyone else on this journey (including me)

[@IsaacNatoli]

most relatable video you've EVER posted. this video hit so so hard 😭 literally have been at the EXACT same place you used to be in, so crazy. trying cold approach and attending events with like-minded people for the past 6 months has really brought me out of the hole a bit. Appreciate this video homie 🙏

[@kirny2399]

The hardest part for me is moving from a province to be closer to family for "support" after my first born and a traumatic birth experience, yet them seldom visiting or calling me. What was the point of moving closer to feel even more distant? I wish I never moved close. If I still lived away I would have believed if I was closer they would have shown up for me. This has been the hardest life awakening for me.

[@ded5630]

Im crying right now. Too real. I feel like I can’t trust anyone to be honest and genuine.

[@felixbreitfuss2298]

I feel like i am not able to get a good connection to people because i am so much different in comparison to everyone else. On the other side i feel great to always work on myself and love my life.

[@Kvothe-c9l]

Yea you pretty much just summed up my biggest problem in my life right now. Thank you

[@trowwzers5057]

I’m part of the second community. I’ve joined clubs and tried to be very social and I’ve failed to meet anyone except some annoying people. The only people that seem to except me are the ones that overly obsess about pronouns/identification, have different hair colors, wear animal costumes, smell bad and get offended about everything. They are the only type of people I would rather suffer from social isolation than be with them

[@dougronald561]

Thanks for being honest about how you meet friends. I’m actually more of an outgoing person and always did those things, such as putting myself out there and approaching strangers with small talk. And I have often gotten pushback from people who just didn’t wanna put the effort in. But your suggestions are absolutely what people need to do once they realize that they need friends and actually have to do something about it.