Couples Therapist Breaks Down ‘Love Is Blind’ Season 2 | Important Lessons in Love

[@thedrasc1465]

I came to this video to watch a review on LIB from a marriage therapists persective, I left learning a lot about myself and what I didnt realize I liked in relationships. This is eye-opening!!!

[@StephAnya]

So glad that you found it insightful! That’s always my hope.

[@edybing]

Me too! :) Going through a breakup now, and this helped me a lot understanding myself

[@bezwering8358]

same here

[@respecthewoman]

@@edybing Hope you find the beauty within yourself and attract that.

[@laura-iv7fq]

Wanted to echo this comment, I've watched a lot of recaps about the couples/show and this was by far the most insightful and helpful for my own life. Thank you for looking at it from this point of view, it's so refreshing and genuinely helpful

[@monac1908]

I believe that Shaina‘a decision to end the engagement with Kyle had more to do with the fact that Shaina was still interested in pursuing Shane. The religion difference was an easy way out.

[@officialsprunt]

That or she just wanted to stay on the show

[@ThatDoll25]

Yes! I hate how she tried to paint herself as some zealot. She wanted Shayne and needed to stay in proximity to him. I also think she was disappointed with Kyle's physical appearance but didn't want to admit it.

[@thetonishow]

Same. I didn’t want to seem judgmental but she didn’t give me vibes of someone who was just SO religious it would be deal breaking. I also don’t think she was attracted to Kyle.

[@mijavera]

I wondered that as well. Did she talk about religion to Shane?

[@bethzumwalt1625]

@@mijavera If they did we didn't see it. It was all about their physical needs. I guess her devout Christianity didn't spill over into premarital sex. Except with Kyle in Mexico.

[@rilleygriffin]

If any man proposed to me with his living mother’s ring, and the first part of the proposal was more or less “You remind me of my mom, and I want someone like my mom” I would run SO fast.

[@princess555o4]

Dang, everyone's different I guess. I would be so happy and feel so loved personally, but I'm a very sentimental person. To each their own

[@annahirox4291]

I'd run like the wind girl he was such a creep 😂

[@titlepending1302]

Same here

[@JB4C89]

I thought I was the only one creeped out. I didnt like that at all.

[@alexish8183]

The ring was fine for me, but i don't ever want a man to say I remind him of his mother lol.

[@andrewcaraballo4184]

I love how you recognized Sal for being emotionally vulnerable. As someone who is Hispanic and from the same city as Sal I think it’s great to note that there is a cultural element of masculinity that he managed to break down and I think that in itself also warrants some more recognition.

[@ChristienahRobertsonTravis]

Here here! I second that!

[@qazedc3]

Same thing with Natalie and Deepti that I saw. As someone from an Asian background, I think Natalie spoke out for herself well. Asians aren’t known to deal with affection and feelings very well which explains her resentment she still had towards Shaina. It’s also a cultural thing for Deepti to be afraid of expressing her desire to be with a man, instead expecting him to express that first

[@vmarsfiles]

Sal was shady. I think he had another woman on the side he liked better thats why he kept doing stuff hoping Mallory would break it off with him

[@Noellep]

post season revelations outed Sal as shady - he got a good edit, as they say, but his whole thing was a front. Most of the cast has said this about him and his behavior after the show reinforced what they said.

[@jenrenby]

Shayne's reaction to Natalie being upset when he thought she was Shaina was so awful and gaslighty that I didn't watch most of their scenes after that. It would've been triggering to me. And I was right when at the end, Shayne blew up and said HORRIFIC things to Natalie.

[@Salutations26]

He gaslit her at the reunion as well. She dodged a bullet.

[@gailauguste1903]

Agree 100%

[@junebee5128]

Yess! I was so glad she said no to marrying him. He was awful to her... gaslighting, toxic, fragile ego... so emotionally abusive. Thank goodness.

[@lilah012]

I'm kind of surprised that this video didn't address his issues with expressing anger in a healthy way

[@MsDesiree39]

She alsi saud some things that were nasty to him. Theres a reason she's single

[@aubbityaub7787]

I would love the show to add some marriage counseling leading up to the weddings. Like once a week for 4 weeks or something so that they can get some help getting through the big challenges that they face. Loved your video, it was so validating to hear a therapist say all the things I was thinking!

[@msltaw85]

I agree with you. Out of all the dating shows I have watched I never seem to see that.

[@juliajordan5023]

YES!!!! It would primarily be ethical to do for the cast, but I also think it would make better TV too

[@diamondstr12]

Great idea!

[@lesley8655]

true!!

[@lumensapace]

Yes! Married at first sight offers some relationship counseling and I wish this show did too!

[@natashasha16]

While Natalie and Shayne did have different love languages, the main issue my husband and I picked up on when we watched their interactions was Shayne's extremely questionable behaviour. His angry tantrum when Natalie was upset due to the things he said when he thought she was Shaina. Him attempting coerce her into physical intimacy on their first night in Mexico, then immediately afterwards insisting that she give him complements when she was clearly uncomfortable. The blow up and awful things he said to her on the night before their wedding. I was seriously concerned for Natalie's wellbeing in the long term if she married him.

[@RambleMaven]

I’m not sure if that was coercion or if she didn’t want to talk about that on camera and he didn’t care about talking about it on camera. In other instances as well it was clear that she just doesn’t like talking about sexual things in front of other ppl. Although she is American I know it’s common in certain Asian cultures to be private about sexuality. Also, going back to the avoidant attachment style referenced in the video she probably just felt icky giving compliments because of her attachment style + not having words of affirmation as a love language. I definitely agree that he needs to work on his explosive reactions tho.

[@alexisdavis7578]

@@RambleMaven Agree 100%! Well said.

[@QuantuMyre]

Yes... Glad for all who don't have the experience to recognize. He is a vulnerable narcissist.

[@creativeopinions8250]

Natalie was raised by a rock of a daddy, there's no way she was ever going to settle for less....

[@Its_Jess00]

@@QuantuMyre I had no idea that was a thing

[@Anon92456]

If someone approached me the way Jarette did, I would not consider it a proposal. "Would you marry me if I asked" is not a proposal. But I see what Jarette was doing. He soft-proposed because he didn't want to risk having an actual proposal be rejected. If he actually proposed and Mallory said no, theres no way he could go to Iyanna and propose to her. That would have been an even bigger gut punch. I do believe that at that point, Mallory was his first choice.

[@MsDesiree39]

She was but you could see the vhem and well they got along but too bad he got his heart broken like that

[@SPRest03]

I didn’t feel like it was a proposal to me either. He definitely liked Mallory more, but I think he had doubt about how Mallory felt about him and put that question out there to confirm if she was on the same page as he was. Funny thing is, while watching it, I felt like he had the deepest connection with Iyanna especially when he shared that story about him being in the hospital and what happened to him. I’m glad they ended up together.

[@titlepending1302]

Same here!! And Mallory knows that she she should have went with what she likes 🤡

[@jra3978]

Yeah i think he was weighing his options and once Mallory said no, he had a chance with Iyanna. Which makes that convo on the beach even more inappropriate because he got rejected by her. And like Mallory said in the reunion, the feelings were still very fresh.

[@ima.m.1658]

@@SPRest03 I don't want to jump to conclusions, but it seemed like he was scared that Iyanna would look different (he did say when he saw her that he was surprised that someone who sounded like her looked like that). I'm not sure what he imagined. I just hope he isn't like Chris Brown who's like "No darkies allowed," and other colorists/featurists.

[@eRoTiCCrEaTiOnS]

I am so happy Deepti and Natalie said no. I didn’t have a good feeling about Shayne/Shake from the beginning and it feels like the two men have some growing to do still.

[@beajack4990]

Shakes reaction to deepti saying no was kinda sad/cringe to me. Like you could tell he was upset but didn’t want people to know so he just overacted with the “it’s a party I don’t care!” That man has serious issues when it comes to relationships and emotions... it’s like he’s trying to be Tom from parks and rec, that’s all i could think of when watching him

[@kristenmeza4295]

Same here! Shayne made me feel the ‘ick’ factor. Shake is very superficial. A lot of growing up is needed but I doubt it’ll happen.

[@A-Ree]

There is no amount of growing that could change Shake’s personality. He can wear masks to hide his narcissism, sure, but girl….he’s the type to stay away from for eternity. Shayne and his temper tantrums….yikes. That’s all I’m going to say.

[@Kaatje04IJ]

@@beajack4990 omg the Tom vibes were SO REAL, all I could think of every time his face popped up

[@nkjmeh]

I thought both of them were immature with some clear either narcissistic tendencies OR mama’s special boi issues. Like Shayne absolutely could dish it out and NOT take it at all. He would tease her and when she’d tease him back he’d immediately get all pouty and offended. Like… he was just mad that she was funnier than him or teasing better than him. I think Shayne was CLEARLY insecure about his intelligence, wit, and personality. Where Natalie had all of those things and more. So he would take it out on her that he felt less. It’s not HER fault you feel some type of way dude. You can’t blame everyone else for everything.

[@c-light7624]

I thought Shayne was insecure and constantly needing that ego boost, which was weird. Just out of the blue he would say, “Tell me something great about ME.” Like huh? Sir, this is a McDonald’s…

[@shanaanthonette8161]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Tamisha710]

Agree. It was too much.

[@portiabartel]

He was being straight forward with what he needed out of the relationship. Nothing wrong with communicating. Words of affirmation is pretty high up on my love language list. If I asked to my bf "I feel pretty shitty right now, can you tell me something you like about me please?" I don't think I'd be out of line? He could just do better in letting people know why he's asking...though he probably doesn't know himself. Therapy would help lol

[@ML-ni1tk]

@@portiabartel i agree.

[@steviesevieria1868]

@@portiabartel totally agree, the immature folks above, criticizing him for expressing his needs, they will learn as they grow up.

[@joykinser]

When Kyle proposed to Shaina I felt like yelling, "Say no!" at the tv screen. I agree it seemed like a bad situation from the start.

[@loripadilla1]

Jarette and Iyanna were my absolute faves. She is adorable and they both seemed to be there for the right reason. People are so angry with Shake, but he admitted he is shallow - Deepti handled it like a boss. She is so classy and I hope she is overrun with offers from real men. I do think she learned having someone that shares her culture is more important than she thought. Danielle was matched perfectly with someone that understands anxiety and I’m so happy she didn’t sabotage her happiness! I couldn’t feel anything with Sal and Malorie; was it ever there? Natalie is so responsible and needs someone that appreciates that. Shane is lovable, but emotionally immature. Love, love, love this show!!

[@MsDesiree39]

Shayne was also dealing wuth the loss if his father and prob shiuldnt have done this show at this time

[@titlepending1302]

Nothing about Iy and J is good

[@troyefunkhouser9038]

Me too! I love that he gave her a family that she’s always wanted and his family are super cute and close. I can’t wait till they have babies and I hope they have a lot. Iyanna was an only child and she said she was lonely so I hope they have lots of beautiful babies!

[@LeoniejtePietje]

"Danielle was matched perfectly with someone that understands anxiety and I’m so happy she didn’t sabotage her happiness!" Are you sure? It seems like she tried her hardest to push Nick away! I really hope she gets/keeps getting therapy for her anxiety, because with her emotional needs, there is no room for Nick's.

[@NH-hp2nn]

@@titlepending1302 please elaborate

[@ariajary2012]

Deepti made me feel so empowered with her decision. I remembered the girl I used to be and it just felt so great! Like you said, I was so proud of her too. ♥

[@LaDomiiT.O]

Iayanna has such a sweet soul and I feel like she deserved more Even tho at the end he saw her value but she deserves someone that’s 100% for her from the beginning

[@k.ambriz9789]

I loved your impressions and the respect you clearly displayed for the participants. I agree completely. I was totally blown away by Sal’s emotionally vulnerability. He reminds me of my sweet husband who is a Latino male that is also wonderfully in touch with his emotions.

[@StephAnya]

Such a blessing ♥️

[@terris.1177]

I know it sounds crazy but I actually understood Daniel's insecurities. I wouldn't display them in the same way but those same thoughts run through my mind when I meet someone and they check almost all of my boxes. The whole "Am I good enough, what if he doesn't like the real me etc." Once they both said I do her whole demeanor changed. She relaxed and just lived in the moment.

[@terris.1177]

@@nasramohamed agree 👍🏾

[@AnastaciaInCleveland]

If I may? The word you may be looking for is "demeanor". ~ Anastacia in Cleveland

[@sunshineandmoon4400]

I also understand her insecurities however she did not become more relaxed after the pods. When Nick when to the party, she had a breakdown because he left and did not stay with her when he said he asked if she wanted him to stay and through the entire season she seemed anxious and fearful that he was gonna leave her or that they would have another fight.

[@terris.1177]

@@AnastaciaInCleveland lol! It you are correct. I was speaking the comments and it picked up the wrong word. Thanks

[@terris.1177]

@@sunshineandmoon4400 I didn't say her demeanor changed when they left the Pods. I changed after they got married. It was terrible before then. I agree

[@realSimoneCherie]

Thank you! Shaina was a train wreck to watch long before she showed her true colors. It’s not about her Christianity or lack there of - it’s about the fact that if your beliefs are that strong then they are deal breakers - and Ignoring her own deal breakers just out of the pressure of the moment is a tell tale sign that someone lacks integrity.

[@steviesevieria1868]

Especially when she came to the party on the beach and badmouthed Natalie, trying to sabotage . If that’s what they call Christianity in her world, I don’t want any of it.

[@makaylaadams423]

I love this show. Truthfully i feel like it need a therapy portion to help the individuals work through their own trials to try to be better for someone else. I feel like this show constantly shows that sometimes you do need help to overcome your own battles. I would love to see what kind of progression could happen if they added premarital counseling to the time they spend living together

[@queenselene1834]

Yes I was saying this too!!!

[@marialealealeale]

I was thinking the same… yet I believe they want it to be dramatic for a “shock factor”

[@tutsdgn4809]

Great idea ☺️

[@portiabartel]

That could be its OWN Netflix reality show, and I'd watch the heck out of it! Would love to normalize the way therapy can help people deal with their emotions and handle relationships. Especially if the contestants were anti-therapy who have their minds changed.

[@Alice-ll6uj]

There’s actually a show in Sweden that does this! Translated it’s called “married at first sight”. It’s great!!

[@Jadedgems]

You know what I would love to see? A podcast with you and reality tv show couples or other family/couples therapists But I’m obsessed with your videos so I just can’t get enough 😩

[@StephAnya]

I’ll keep this in mind! Thanks for that suggestion and being so supportive of the channel.

[@Emmah1243]

@@StephAnya other Therapist channels I watch on KZbin are 'Psychology in Seattle' and 'Cinema Therpay'. Would love some kind of collaboration!

[@jagirl_vendetta2197]

I was so shocked when Jarette proposed to Malory. Before that I thought it was very obvious that Malory preferred Sal in the pods. I remember there was a scene where Mal and Jarette were talking then she cut their pod time short then immediately went to Sal and her demeanour just changed! She was so much more excited to talk to Sal

[@MsDesiree39]

See that worked very well for her....lol

[@titlepending1302]

That wasn’t shocking considering he’s a black man

[@robynrichards96]

Jarette clearly had a deeper connection with Iyanna, so I wonder if he was more caught up with the idea of Mallory’s looks. Good on Mallory’s part that she recognized that their relationship was surface level. They didn’t come to the show to fall in love with each other’s looks. So honestly, good on her part

[@xoxoxoxo4483]

After watching Steph Anya's commentary, I realize that Jarette still has growing up to do. He's judging a relationship based on superficial buddy/hangout things. But not looking more deeply about what it takes for a solid long-lasting relationship. Maybe it's possible to grow up just by being in a relationship, but I got the impression that he might hurt Iyanna after marriage. Often, what happens, is we grow from relationships with people and then we take those lessons and experiences and are better for a new person. But I hope that Jarette can be the man that Ayanna needs.

[@Dancediva240]

yah then she sees Sal in person and just doesnt feel attracted. The whole vibe with her and Sal was just giving time of day to someone she knew 100% was into her. It was more gratitude that he loves her than any authentic passion on her end.

[@maejohnson412]

So originally my favorite couple was Iyanna & Jarette. I too agree that I thought they had a stronger emotional connection than he and Mallory but then he made his decision and proposed to Mallory ( because that was a proposal) and she said no. Then he decided to pick Iyanna. The thing that hurt me because I cried with Iyanna as she walked out of the Pod. In the area of now she was questioning her “self worth” of being enough and that hurt my heart. I’m anticipating the reunion.

[@filmgirlLisa]

This is why you don't let friends into your relationship haha---because I KNOW that if Iyanna was my good friend/sister/cousin I would have been BEGGING her to leave Jarrett when he proposed (and yes it was a safe proposal) to Mallory first.

[@songbird-wj4yj]

Just to add to this, I was pissed when Jarrette commented on Mallory’s ring. He said later that it was a joke, but I feel like that’s just an excuse. It was very disrespectful to Mallory, Sal, Iyanna, and their respective relationships for him to make those comments.

[@steviesevieria1868]

@@songbird-wj4yj truth

[@PerpetualJoy]

I've heard about love languages for a long time, but I had never heard them talked about in the other way, such that the kinds of things that can lift you up the most can also put you to your lowest. That definitely makes me rethink times I have felt hurt over seemingly "nothing."

[@sugarwaterpurple5280]

I went back and forth about Shayne. At first I felt he was annoying but he grew on me watching him with Natalie. It's clear that as confident as he acts he has low self esteem and needs a partner who builds him up. Now the blow ups were another issue. The fact that he lacks control over his reactions is a problem and as much as I thought they had a nice chemistry, I think Natalie made the right decision, at least until he can seek therapy for how to cope with his emotions. The way he argues is not ok.

[@MsDesiree39]

She also said things she shoukdnt have and he is still mourning the loss if a parent. Mismatch overall but 2 ciuples married fr bith seasons weird but great

[@rebekah4679]

I'm not married. Not even dating to be honest 😂 but I appreciate how you broke everything down. As a very analytical person, it was satisfying to watch.

[@KathleenSmith94]

I was thinking about how often in their arguments Danielle and Nick engage in contempt by mimicking each other or by calling each other "toxic" which seems to be triggering both of their anxieties/insecurities. I wonder how emotionally safe they feel in the relationship.

[@nataliaalmeida-nacillustra5954]

If they're doing couple's therapy as they said, maybe this is being addressed. I honestly don't think this is something unfixable.

[@57andstillkicking]

@@nataliaalmeida-nacillustra5954 It is absolutely fixable!!

[@Dancediva240]

after she asked if he would be okay with her friends breaking furniture when they come over, I knew she was a goner lol

[@Sleipnirseight]

7:00 THISSSS is something I have been working hard to change about my non-confrontational, people-pleasing self! My partner and I grew up in very volatile homes and have totally opposite communication styles. But we have come a LONG way together in improving our communication. It was ROUGH at first, but therapy (especially for him) made an almost immediate difference. I only wish each of us had gone to a therapist sooner. Woulda saved a LOT of time and heartache. Thank you for making such educational content! It really makes a difference for so many people

[@antionettethegirlnextdoor]

So happy I stumbled across your channel, I am a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Registered Marriage and Family Therapy Intern, (I hold a doctorate degree in MFT) it’s sooo refreshing to see someone else in the profession I can relate too! Definitely motivated me to take my channel more serious

[@BlackQueenA1825]

SPOILER ALERT... I really enjoyed this video and I hope you'll do more of them for next season. I do think that Jarrett was proposing to Mallory and it did make me feel differently about his relationship with Iyanna (which I initially loved his relationship with Iyanna). I especially felt differently when I saw how he was talking to Mallory at the get together they had while in Mexico. I will admit that seeing him and Iyanna on their wedding day gave me some hope for them. But it's also easy to get wrapped up in the emotions on the big day so I'm excited to see if they are still together. Keep up with the awesome videos because you make really great videos.

[@StephAnya]

Thank you so much! And also I completely agree with you about everything you said. I just hope he treats her well and she doesn't end up regretting taking the risk.

[@Jadedgems]

Said so well. I felt that way as well. I was so grateful that Iyanna’s parents were there to gauge him and set him straight, and they’d definitely have her back in the future through whatever happens between them

[@Sungoddessz]

Iyanna deserves better

[@jaydecampbell3499]

Same I’ve been so sceptical and it’s like I see them together and I’m happy for them but in the back of my mind I’m worried for her. Just glad they’re still together and happy now and I hope it stays that way

[@titlepending1302]

I see their whole relationship as a joke

[@aliananar5206]

This was one of my favorite analysis of the show. I really appreciate your energy , you come off as non judgmental and incredibly empathetic. Especially your analysis of Shane , who was definitely someone I couldn’t understand and generally disliked on the show. But , what you said about his love language was so true and it really wasn’t fair to him that he wasn’t getting what he needed out of the relationship and did explain some of his actions. Even though I still feel really bad for Natalie I can now have some empathy for Shane as well.

[@MsDesiree39]

Plus his father passed away recently.

[@ThisIsMyLifRightNow]

I’m not even half way through this video and I have already learned so much about myself and my relationship. I will absolutely be giving my boyfriend the love language test tonight and I’ll take it along side him, so we can hopefully strengthen our relationship even more

[@CharlieSimsYT]

Deepti was my absolutely favourite! Patience of a saint definitely and I felt so empowered by her decision in the end, but I do think she could have started some dialogue with him early on and asked him about why they haven't been intimate if that's what she wanted because I think Shake thought it would be fine for her to have a sexless marriage... Because he seemed to be prepping himself for that... so having a conversation about her needs may have brought them together and encouraged him to try and form something physical, instead they both stuck their head in the sand.

[@MsDesiree39]

Funny thibg is theyre both average looking but he thinks he is and wants a supermodel....lol

[@currandero]

In my opinion she wouldn’t have achieved anything, Snake is too superficial and egocentric

[@CharlieSimsYT]

Yeah, I agree after seeing that reunion 🙈 she's better off without him! He's missed out!

[@tamarateachesenglish8441]

I liked Deepti a lot but your comment was spot on. They BOTH stuck their heads in the sand. No.... Shake wasn't a hardbody but let's face it men can be very visual whether they want to or not. Women tend to downplay the physical and can content themselves with being in a less than passionate relationship if they value other things. She said she lost the weight but she still carried herself like a person who lacked confidence in their figure. You could see it in the glimpses we had of her onscreen. He had to see it up close and personal 24/7 and struggled with whether he could LIVE with it forever. If she was really strong on showing herself as attractive to him and knowing if he really wanted that she would have put the priority in that area too. She didn't. Instead, she was betting that the cultural connection would sway him. Honestly, her ending it at the alter the way she did made me pity her. It wasn't growth. It was not "choosing her" as she put it but just smacked of insecurity and revengeful antics. Shake probably handled this better than we thought but we can't give him that benefit due to the edits. I do think this show would benefit from the couples getting some time individually with counselors and as a couple before they head down the aisle.

[@djpchocolateguy224]

That man cried!!!! Jarrette was definitely proposing!

[@StephAnya]

Exactly!

[@MsDesiree39]

It was tough to watch but he did what they were supposed to

[@InThisEssayIWill...]

I definitely struggle with giving words of affirmation, it's like the antithesis of my own love language. I personally find it patronizing and degrading when someone tries to use them on me and have a hard time getting out of my own head to think that someone might actually want, let alone *need* to be spoken to like that...

[@nuponicabarker7705]

Same!!

[@maxiliadesir3507]

I agree I know that my love language is physical touch and quality time it would be really hard for me to be with someone who constantly needs words of affirmation especially because I tend to be a bit sarcastic so I understood where Natalie was coming from even receiving compliments myself can make me feel really uncomfortable. I wish that was something that she was able to express to Shane and honestly they probably just shouldn’t have been together in the first place there’s several red flags in that relationship so I honestly don’t know how they even made it this far.

[@ahmorgan]

For me it's gifts, I can't wrap my mind around putting a gift on such a pedestal that I feel unloved if it's not exactly what I wanted. I don't really like receiving gifts that much and I def don't like buying them

[@InThisEssayIWill...]

@@ahmorgan I can see that, I'm not a big fan of buying gifts but I'm super crafty and artistic so I love making gifts for people.. and it's really hurtful if those gifts aren't treasured, they're an extension of me that I'm entrusting to your care... But a blanket I found for you at target doesn't really have the same feel.

[@chikai.3866]

SAME!! I'm working on it in therapy but it's difficult for me to remember to compliment people because I spend a lot of time evaluating whether the compliments I get are genuine.

[@stephaniesinternetlife]

I was really surprised as well that Jarrette’s first choice was Mallory. Seeing him and Iyanna together really made me think he was going to choose her over anyone else. I guess there was more to Mallory and Jarrette’s relationship than was shown

[@sarahtaavetti]

My main receiving love language is affirmations too. But I feel there is a difference between feeling loved and appriciated by the words that are being said to you and being needy for compliments all the time to form some kind of base level of connection. Shaine seem to be deeeply insecure and thus also very defensive. He only focuses on what he needs, rather than focus on Nathalies need. I feel that Nathalie has very good communication skills in general, while Shaine doesn‘t and lashes out a lot. In my opinions, there are things that should never be said to a partner, even in anger. That you hate them is one of them. Maybe I feel so bad for them because I am a Nathalie type who usually goes for Shaine Types.

[@filmgirlLisa]

I felt differently. Shayne seems to always find himself the butt of the jokes. He even said in the beginning, "I know I'm a tool." That to me means he internalized all the negative things people have said to him in life based on his personality and his physical quirks. When you've been maligned alot, you need a lot. To me he was giving Natalie all he had but as soon as they came out the pods she thought it funnier to go in on him, probably like people did to him a lot. It was weird to me that she would switch up like that. I imagine that he hit a wall with "losing" the batting cage thing (which shouldn't be a big deal to us but might've been huge to him) and maybe the fight started with Natalie making fun of it and it got really big. I do feel bad for them both but he definitely needs therapy.

[@undercoverfangirl5491]

@@filmgirlLisa That’s what I thought as well.

[@j.r.cilliangreen4083]

As a new therapist that is looking at opening to couple’s therapy…I need to sit under you as a student. Amazing work and such good insight. Just incredible!

[@sonnie777]

Can you please do season 1 as well? I think it would be interesting especially knowing where some of them are currently at and with the reunion episodes. I just started the series recently and love it! I haven’t quite made it to the end of season 2 but think your analysis has been spot on!

[@gabiluch87]

Season 1 was great! Specially analyze Damian a Giannina, those two are a train wreck

[@Jadedgems]

In the most loving way possible can I just say your outfit reminds me of that retro picture of Dwayne the Rock Johnson when he was wearing that turtleneck 😂😩😭💗

[@StephAnya]

Hahaha! Yess I see it!

[@myrawade6581]

My favorite couples are: Jarette & Iyanna, yes he had two connections while in the pod, and he asked Mallory an indirect question which she turn down, what I liked about Jarrette that he told Iyanna the truth he didn't go lying to her, Iyanna had very strong love for Jarette, The unnecessary conversation that he had with Mallory is what really got me upset, I really believed it was more like a joke, it came off as been disrespectful, I am glad that they get pass that, and they are happily married. Nick and Danielle, they two loved each other but I could see Danielle had a bit of struggles with some insecurities which she never hides, I think Nick was always there for her, I was really feeling it for her, this relationship will last long. since they both going through therapy

[@titlepending1302]

Yes Iyanna is still traumatized by the situation they had in Mexico

[@chaoselemental6759]

I thought the same things about Jarrett - at least he didn’t lie to Iyanna about the Mallory situation! That’s a good sign! She should’ve trusted him more.

[@2005noel]

@@titlepending1302 As well she should be. She deserves waaay better than Jarette.

[@ynazzra]

Finally! A fellow therapist discussing my guilty pleasure shows 😁😁 Eeeeee, cannot wait to dive into this!

[@nuttypurrfessor]

I love Iyanna and Jarrett but I'm biased because my name sounds exactly the same as Iyanna's! I was so in awe of how she was able to grow and come out of her trauma and be strong yet vulnerable 💪🏼 I've had some trauma as well and it can be hard sometimes not to just let the dark thoughts take over but I feel like seeing her in this show was a reminder from the Universe that I can live a good life too 🌱🌱🌱🌱

[@ndm7985]

“Learning how to manage those arguments and not avoid them” THIS!!!!!

[@cherryb3240]

Jarrett was definitely proposing to Mal in the most cowardly of ways. And I don't understand they hype about their relationship because he was not ready for marriage at all. Watching them get married was like watching a child run around with an antique glass vase and I hate to think of the way his immaturity will impact her.

[@sunflowerg2872]

You mean Iyanna?

[@cherryb3240]

@@sunflowerg2872 Yeah, I meant I didn't understand the hype around his relationship with Iyanna 👍🏾

[@paranoidgoose4519]

Jarrett and Iyanna had the best relationship of the season by far. They didn't have a single fight during their 4 weeks while all the other couples had their partner crying every other day. Their only arguments, if you can even call them that, were scripted. A worker on the show said that on twitter and Iyanna retweeted him.

[@cherryb3240]

@paranoid goose I disagree. Just because people don't argue, doesn't mean the relationship is healthy. They got back from their honeymoon moon and he goes out 3 times until after 3am in 1 week. She had to ask him not to turn up to the wedding drunk and he and his friends laughed at that and carried on drinking. And when his friends asked him if he was ready to ignore the call of the streets, he seemed quite unsure, and so did they! Also, they seem to want different things; he wants a baby straight away and she wants to study. He didn't look very keen on the idea of financially supporting her to achieve that when all he wants is a baby. I'd hate for her to put her dreams aside because of his wishes. He came across very immature and not ready for marriage. But that's my opinion and you have yours.

[@2005noel]

@@cherryb3240 That's my opinion too. You made all the points I was thinking. Iyanna deserves soooo much better than Jarrette. It is sad how the kindest people often end up with the most self absorbed.

[@nuponicabarker7705]

Jarrett DEFINITELY proposed to Mallory!!! I also feel as though his “feelings” towards her were very rehearsed. I’m glad mom hit him with a follow up question.

[@MsDesiree39]

They had some chemistry and she is a mature attractive woman but def has issues

[@SONGbyrdRYzing]

Am so glad to see you have your own channel. For those who may not know, she has also did relationship analyses for GQ (?) on shows such as Bridgerton and the line. Check those out as well.

[@jasmine-fw4yq]

thanks for the recommendation!

[@tainav618]

I didn't watch the show but I love hearing your opinions and thoughts as a therapist! Really awesome video to listen to while I do my laundry, it definitely made it more exciting!

[@pamelamarsh6457]

Nice analysis! I liked Iyana and Jared the best. I was so surprised that Nick did not run, multiple times from Danielle. I think her insecurity goes way beyond what anyone should endure in a relationship

[@Dancediva240]

and the breaking of tables when her friends come over!! My jaw dropped when she asked him if he would be okay with that

[@alexisdavis7578]

Aside from Shake’s mom, Shayne definitely gave him the best advice… imo.

[@StephAnya]

Shake’s mom is a queen!

[@Ethia9]

I love your bit on “love language” and communicating it. My husband is very-much someone who thrives from words of affirmation and appreciation but it’s something that doesn’t flow out naturally from me. I try very hard to make sure I tell him how thankful for him I am and even if it comes out rough-sounding and unnatural, he knows I’m sincere. I think it makes everything hit stronger for him ❤

[@Dancediva240]

so you'd never ever paid a compliment before in your life before he came along? How can it be that unnatural?

[@jnesha3]

Whew! This gave me a reality check that I needed about relationships. I definitely agree with many of your points regarding the show.

[@mirimiriela480]

The point about how love languages can give insight into what hurts the most is so amazing--I never even thought about that!

[@brefurn253]

I felt like Jarrett was worried when Iyanna said she was not into kissing and being very physical. I definitely think they had a better emotional connection. She is definitely an awesome person.

[@infjinfj1900]

I think Mallory was actually running away from her true feelings because she didn’t trust herself to make the right decisions in them, along with wanting to please her family. Mallory thought choosing Sal would would be best for her in hopes that her attraction to “what she thought would be a mistake,” (Jarrette) would go away and it didn’t. Many therapists and dating coaches encourage people to downplay their chemistry out of fear of picking the wrong partner, and this is an example of how it backfires. Mallory and Jarrett’s chemistry was so strong that Sal and Iyanna were both threatened. That’s the real reason why Sal decided to say “no” because he could not get the same reaction out of Mallory that Jarrette did in that one conversation in Mexico. I’m a firm believer that relationships work better when women their mates, and Iyanna chose Jarrette. Mallory had a look of regret at the reunion when she realized Jarrette turned out to be a good partner for Iyanna when it could have been her. You should always trust your own intuition when dating.

[@vibrantthangoriginal]

I think Jarrett only went for Mallory for competition with Sal

[@MsDesiree39]

@vibrantthang. No he had a good connection euth mal and liked her furst

[@titlepending1302]

Well said!

[@1drfulfree471]

@@MsDesiree39 no, he didn’t. Mallory sounded easy. A people pleaser, someone who would let him do what he wanted and support him. Iyanna, is someone who is going to make him be the Man his father raised him to be! Jarrett, realize that it’s time to grow up and become really responsible for someone other than himself.

[@alexish8183]

@@1drfulfree471 I believe Jarett and Mallory had natural chemistry and their relationship would have been very passionate. However, that doesn't always translate to the best long term partnership. Jarrett and Iyanna compliment one another in a way that makes their bond more likely to be stable and long lasting. Iyanna seems to be very solid in who she is, her morals, and her values. That element seems to be missing for Mallory in my opinion.

[@naa8217]

I love Kinetic Content shows as well! This is a really great review/analysis of the couples we’ve seen this season - I honestly think that they went the MAFS route of picking certain people for ‘entertainment value’ rather than the “let’s try to get another Cameron and Lauren” route. Looking forward to your next video :)

[@StephAnya]

Thanks for watching! I miss the old MAFS :(

[@shelby8534b]

Watching for the tea, leaving with more self awareness 🖤 thank you for taking the time to make these videos, they are extremely helpful for people who don’t go to therapy regularly

[@amandagleason593]

Yes! So much great insight here. As a future MFT I did a lot of this while watching it lol Iyanna reminds me of season 1 Lauren, love them both. Quick thought- financial security can always change during a marriage (esp with an unforeseen event like covid) while emotional stability is a skill that doesn’t often go away. However, emotional security can grow if underdeveloped, and with therapy it can help a couple grow together versus apart. So thank you for bringing that up! You nailed the dynamics of these relationships and this was so fun to watch. Also, team Sal forever- such a good dude.

[@samanthamiller2412]

I actually SO appreciate that you're not just looking down on Shane. Much as he was so hard to watch and understand, and definitely made some huge mistakes in handling himself and needs to work on himself - you still didn't talk down about him, dismiss him as a lost cause, or blame the entirety of his broken relationship dynamics on his actions alone. Such a refreshing, fair-minded perspective!

[@katecollins2471]

Wow this was so spot on. I loved this breakdown. You clearly are incredibly intelligent and educated in this area and I really appreciated your opinions! Also my favorite couple was jarette and iyana :)

[@StephAnya]

Thanks so much! ♥️

[@ArtByHazel]

Thank God for trauma-informed therapists where we can understand social, economic, relational, spiritual connections, undoing the mistakes from generations past, having difficult conversations yet compassionate enough to accept our humanity. It's great to see how couples are attracted through their unconscious conditioning, and attachment. Thank you for sharing your healthy perspective on this social experiment. A ton to unpack. Liquid gold.

[@HaileyKat]

I would love to see your take on season 1 of love is blind 👀 watching this one was very informative and interesting aaa and extremely insightful too.

[@Izjeanspears]

i initially had so many reservations when watching LIB that i had skipped through a lot of this season. but listening to your observations and what you really liked about the cast members/pairs was really insightful - i might just rewatch with brand new eyes! thank you for your time, i definitely appreciate you and this video!!

[@domoniquesmith88]

Jarrett definitely proposed to Mallory, and Iyanna is wearing the ring he got for Mal.

[@MsDesiree39]

He did what theyre supposed to which is propose to the one u feel a connection with

[@AshiyaWhitley-ShawVeganAthlete]

I think Jarrette would have fully proposed to Mal after what I’ll call “proposal probing”.😆 He knew Mal had a connection to Sal, and he didn’t want to get entirely rejected…🤷🏽‍♀️ So he began fishing. Once Mal answered his questions in a way, that he was sure he’d receive an emphatic “No”, he was crushed… but could say he never literally proposed. So Iyanna wasn’t “technically” second. 👀 I love the way it turned out with Jarrette and Iyanna. 🤐

[@myrawade6581]

I totally agreed, Iyanna and Jarette shared life stories about each other with a lot of emotion coming out. This is God's work, their union is blessed they have family as a support team, it will work, they are comfortable with each other, and are very happy together, it is showing on their facial expressions. Unity is strength!

[@Beverleyrog]

@@myrawade6581 an it looks like she is expecting!!!

[@titlepending1302]

@@Beverleyrog yes she was looking fat on the reunion… she was the only one that looked unflattering

[@titlepending1302]

lol you really delusional here you know damn well Iyana was SECOND choice , he used that method to protect himself

[@2005noel]

Iyanna deserves waaaay better than Jarrette!!!!

[@monchiquita25]

I try to watch you videos while working and it never works bc you drop such amazing nuggets I end up rewinding constantly 🤓 so I don't miss anything. Thanks for all the education and information!

[@StephAnya]

On one hand I wish that you could watch however you want, but on the other hand I'm glad that you're finding the videos so informative! Thank you!

[@TroyP20]

Shania was using her religion as an excuse. Cause she was all in love and obsessed with the one guy who was engaged to the Korean women. She even tried to sabotage someone else relationship

[@BigAsh0011]

I agree with this. She def used her religion to hide the fact that she really wanted Shayne. If her religion was really a deal breaker that would have came up day one in the pods . Now she loses Shayne it's an issue? I really think if Shayne chose her, religion would all of sudden be a none issue.....

[@DrStellOO]

I always love your reactions😘 Personally it'll be hard for me to be with someone who's main love language is words of affirmation. It sounds exhausting.

[@StephAnya]

I understand that. As a words of affirmation person myself, it takes a special kind of person to deal with us lol

[@alexisdavis7578]

@@StephAnya I could do it! 🥰 My love language is acts of service, but I love empowering the people I love. I think I could see myself with someone who needs that. I have “motivational speaker” energy. Lol

[@kerry6689]

I believe he was trying to propose in a cowardly way as you stated! It was truly an indirect way to go about it.

[@xprincessfluffyx]

Loved this video!!! I’d love to see your recaps or Married at First Sight or other shows too! Cool to see an analysis of the relationships and understand where things are coming from. I’m holding out for Jarett and Iyana! She deserves only the best but it does seem like he’s really making an effort for her and I hope it works out.

[@tamirisgaelzer1902]

It's so refreshing to see a marriage/family therapist that doesn't put romantic relationships on a pedestal and didn't think that should be maintained no matter the cost Unfortunately I got used to marriage counselors that any relationship is solvable if the partners (especially women) ""put in the work""

[@osadat1902]

Love your videos! I love hearing you react to these shows and ur videos make me think about how to avoid these things in the future haha

[@StephAnya]

Glad you like them! Thank you for watching :)

[@glennsak]

This is one of the best commentaries on Love is Blind. Well done.

[@desireesantos4250]

Such a great video! Steph, you have such a clear, insightful, and beautiful way of explaining things. Instantly subscribed 🙂

[@StephAnya]

Thank you! So glad to have you here!

[@quiyamahbritton905]

I love Iyanna and Jarrette. I love the way they continued to communicate with one another throughout their engagement and marriage.

[@vivibelle2922]

Love this reaction episode, thank you so much for doing LIB (I'm a huge fan of this series)! My favourite couple is Jarrett and Iyanna, I adore their vulnerability together, and even though some might feel Iyanna is a bit immature, I actually feel that she's incredibly mature in her emotional availability and is very insightful. A close second though who I was surprised I liked was Shyane and Natalie - I wasn't a big fan of Shayne to begin with because he's definitely not the personality type I would be attracted to, but I have great respect for how open he was right away with what his love language is, and how he handled the situation Shaina, as well as the conversation with Shake. I do agree Shayne/Nat's love languages is a serious mismatch (when she called him a piece of s*** jokingly I cringed sooooo hard), and I think ultimately was what caused the demise in their relationship... but I would ask if there's any amount of couple's counselling that could have helped them? They really do seem great together if they can learn how to give each other what they both need. As for favourite person overall, definitely Deepti hands down! She is who I want to be when I grow up - and I'm almost 40 🤣🤣🤣 So much self awareness, confidence, and kindness... just beautiful inside and out. Whoever she chooses to be her partner is the luckiest person!

[@titlepending1302]

Girl she is immature… A real women would NEVER allow a man to disrespect her in front of her face AS FOR DEEPTI well she saw the red flags but she’s hurt lmfao

[@laynasnow8550]

I think this information, and the information you give, is so important! Not just for people in relationships, but in general to understand themselves. This is the first video of yours that I've seen, but i'll continue watching more!! PS I know there is a cultural difference, but I'd love to see your thoughts on the other Love Is Blind versions (Brazil and Japan)!

[@NDObeats]

Great video! I'm looking forward to the reunion

[@StephAnya]

Can't wait!

[@ceceliam9014]

Okay, you're fantastic. I don't know this show or have any interest in reality shows, but I watched this video start to finish because your insights about relationships are fantastic. I think you're especially strong in these reaction type videos making direct observstions about how people are interacting. Thank you! And I'd love to see more movie/tv/relationship reaction videos especially if you have interest in doing more. I already feel like I've learned so much from you!

[@BerniesDaughter]

I agree with everything you said-even about Jarette’s proposal, cause it was a proposal 😂 You echoed every thought I had while watching. Great video!

[@StephAnya]

Right?? Thank you!

[@marialynnedesigns]

Oh my goodness...you are incredible! Everything you said, clicked! I loved how you were super non-judgemental about each person in the show and how they handled things...and also had such incredible explanations for the actions of the participants! And mostly, I loved how you humanized each person! SO SO good...especially when the media tries to villain-ize or glorify one person in each season..It is refreshing to see someone humanize the people in the process and remind us that this is quite an unusual experiment! Love your take on this. I would LOVE to see you breakdown the interactions at the reunion!!

[@danitspeaks6280]

I love this show too and you hit the nail on the head with all couples. What did you think about Shaina telling Shayne that his relationship was trash? I do feel like Ayanna deserved the better engagement kind of wished she said no only because he didn't choose her first. Do more videos? Please review MAFS!!!!

[@StephAnya]

I felt like that was such a malicious move by Shaina! I’ve done a couple of MAFS videos from Season 12, but honestly that season wiped me out and I haven’t watched since.

[@deborahsimmons3370]

@@StephAnya what r MAFs?

[@umyumlum47]

@@deborahsimmons3370 Marriage at First Sight

[@imkelucius7862]

So I came to this video because of the videos on season 3 you’ve made. It was really eye opening the way you talked about love languages. I know what my husbands and mine love language is, and I know they are very different. And I’ve actually used his love language to get more of my love language from him. But hearing you talk about the downside of those love languages makes so much sense to me. We don’t have that many fights but the fights we do have are more or less about the same stuff and ultimately about our love languages and the way they are or aren’t met.

[@KissyRitzy]

My favorite couple hands down was Jarret and Iyanna, I was going to have a heart attack when he proposed to Mallory first, like what on earth are you doing dude?! Nick and Danielle are great together and so I'm really happy they have each other def Nick understand Danielle really well. I understand Deepti saying yes to Shake's proposal, but I was truly glad she said NO to marring him, I hope she and Kyle pursue dating. Natalie and Shayne were really cute together and you could tell that they have love for one another nonetheless they were very different, so they're not meant to be. I don't think Mallory was committed to Sal the way he deserved and she tried far too late to woo him. Shayna was the Jessica of season 2 so by all means not worth even mentioning.

[@kholsk8857]

Can I just say, thank you so much, Steph. Your insight is so refreshing and healthy. I know this video focused on these couples, but with your perspective, I found myself reflecting on my own character. I believe that people become invested in reality television because there are aspects that reflect their characteristics. So for your words to have uplifted some of their (love is blind contestants) choices and highlighted where they could improve, was really encouraging. This made me less afraid of therapy, I just don't know where to start.

[@caitlynblake2773]

I felt that many of them were mismatched this season. Maybe it’s because they understood the experiment better than the season 1 group, so they were willing to take more risks? Anyway, I found that I liked almost everyone who ended up engaged, except Shane and Shake. Shake was clearly very shallow, and Shane irritated me beyond belief. He seemed very cocky, entitled and loud, without any humility to balance him out.

[@neevy1779]

I just recently watched the full season for the first time. My main takeaway was that I want to watch stuff like this with my little girl when she's older so we can discuss healthy relationships, red flags, etc. So I was happy to find this video! I would love to hear more analysis since the final episodes have been released. Especially regarding Shayne and glimpses into what appeared to be anger issues he needs to work through before he can be in a safe and healthy relationship with anyone. There were times he seemed really scary and verbally violent. I will say, it was good for me to think for about his love language. I also need words of affirmation but there seems to be a stigma around it, like people who need affirmation are more shallow, or that maybe it's more acceptable for a woman than a man to have that need. Thanks for helping me think and examine myself!

[@monelwookie1]

Jarrett and Iyanna were my favorite! I cried when they met after the proposal. I was so nervous about them meeting for the first time.

[@bruh666]

My day always becomes 100x better when I see you have a new video 🤩

[@StephAnya]

Ahhh 🤗 So happy to hear that!

[@rodolfopayes6206]

I love your videos, these videos help me in my relationship with my wife and I encourage you to keep with the good work😍 please make important lessons of love Is blind JAPAN I've already watched it and it blow my mind , they have a diferent interaction plus in that show it Let us watched more about their interactions, I highly recommend this JAPAN show since you love those shows love you Xoxo 💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓

[@starstar3389]

YESSSSSS PLEASE me too that´s insaine, it´s like a hole new world ,please make a lesson of love is blind JAPAN

[@rodolfopayes6206]

@@starstar3389 Omg Yess thanks for the support haha 💓

[@starstar3389]

@@rodolfopayes6206 i hope she make a video of that, fingers crossed !!!!!

[@melissapayes7485]

yeees please take a look of these show too higly recommended

[@queeen8450]

yessss please listen to them these show is awesome

[@jenesse1432]

You were so positive in your review!! What you were saying was true, but you didn’t put anyone down during it. That’s so rare! I feel like if i was in the show, i would have walked away feeling good about myself. Thank you for being kind 😊

[@nina-sv2wo]

I can't wait to finally get into a relationship just to use all these tactics I learned from videos like this😂

[@danielleatkinson178]

the way you talked about this without judgment is AMAZING!

[@carlam.crawford200]

Hands down Jarrett and Iyanna were my favorite couple, Shane and Natalie were my distant second. Truth be told, I am still a huge fan of season 1's Cameron and Lauren for so many reasons. All of these couples seemed to be more in touch with their emotional love connection and process. I understand why Shane and Natalie didn't ultimately commit, but I don't believe that they didn't really love each other. For the two couples that actually did get married, I am rooting for their lifelong success. I really appreciated how they worked through some of the challenges that confronted their relationships on the show. I love black love ❤️

[@lididuye]

You are so so smart! I didn’t want the video to end cause I wanted to hear you talk more. I’m so glad your channel came on my recommendation today!

[@JelisaSmith]

I thoroughly enjoyed this review! So insightful and loved hearing this from your perspective. It was so refreshing as I’ve shared similar thoughts with my bestie in our voice texts!! Ha

[@plamondonworks6948]

I saw you on GQ and I'm so excited you have a KZbin channel! I love how simple, empathetic and helpful your commentary is

[@lexiewithpurposeconcepts3586]

Yes! I felt so bad for Danielle, sis had to heal.

[@troyefunkhouser9038]

Your analysis of Shayne and Natalie is spot on! You are so right. Shayne needs those kind words and that repulsed Natalie. That was a total mic drop for me, thank you.

[@c.t7289]

hate Jared and Anyana together - he stays calling her strong. Code work for I'm going to put you through the ringer.

[@StephAnya]

That was my fear when he kept saying that too

[@MJ-gm7km]

That's very insightful! I didn't pick up on that. New red flag for me to watch out for lol

[@MrTellyGunner]

I’m late to the LiB series, but this video is such a fair and thoughtful analysis of their dynamic. I 100% agree with you on all fronts. Subscribed!

[@general9179]

your channel is such a gem in the youtube realm, thank you so much for all that you do!

[@StephAnya]

🥺 thank you for watching ♥️