Couples Therapy | Breakthroughs and Breakdowns | SHOWTIME

[@tinjadog]

Thank you to the participants willing to share their lives with us.

[@KT_M]

Thank you for such a productive comment. More of this, people!

[@SunGathersDust]

1:20 Some people are addicted to being misunderstood because it means they never have to be accountable for their actions if no one truly understands their words or actions. Makes me sick!

[@amberjackson9902]

Yes! You better preach!

[@4everu984]

I’m a happily married marriage counselor and this therapist ROCKS! No BS. Love it.

[@mare6366]

the patience she shows w this narcissist ! listening to him gives me anxiety as he is exactly like a coworker that harassed me..and gaslit me when i complained to HR. luckily he was fired in the end!

[@atheistium]

Honestly he reminds me of my dad. Arrogant, angry, nothing is good enough.

[@inMuro]

i can imagine it must be hard for you to see this, i am sorry that happened to you, it sounds awful. At the same time, I would be mindful not to make too big of a conclusion out of someone's entire personality just on this little conversation. There might be a million things going on. It's hard to embrace complexity when we look at things on the internet, and to put them in a green or a red check box. Yet, I feel it's important to try, especially when the fragment is so short. With your background, I can imagine it's even harder for you.

[@veronicaperez3555]

Bless her patience. Ready for a new season. She’s so amazing

[@kekakid05]

This makes me appreciate being single lol

[@meronwube1776]

Same 😂

[@mwandikay]

Same

[@silverrhode]

Same. That was exhausting

[@TamaraC840]

I truly love this for you

[@melstarr1864]

Yes, stay single. But make sure you don’t have children.

[@queenred.6159]

The emotional labor in relationships can be exhausting. People are exhausting that is why i need my solitude whether im in or out the relationship

[@Subliminalmessage78]

💯 It terrifies me that I’ll be deprived of solitude with someone whom I grow resentful.

[@SmileySaidIt]

Yes!

[@tananario23]

The first man needs to be single and leave women alone. Forever.

[@jademoon5103]

I know. He’s so awful

[@memberofthetribe1]

He needs to be single and leave Men alone too. All narcissists should be regulated to blow up dolls.

[@inMuro]

we dont know the backstory, it's not that nice to another human to be so decisive about someone's entire existence based on a three minute snippet. With your permission, I would suggest to reframe it: this man comes across quite negative and difficult to me, or seems to protest to everything. I am curious as to why. In the meantime, in my perception, if this is indeed how he is in the majority of the relationship, i can imagine it must be difficult for their partner to communicate with them.

[@oliviae369]

@@inMuro He was on the first season. You should watch that entire season, and then come back and apologize to the commenters here. That guy was next level - so fascinating/scary to watch him.

[@dforgr9257]

​@@oliviae369 They do not need to apologize to anyone. Their comment was balanced, respectful and valid... smh

[@kimberlywilliams5337]

I can’t be a therapist.. I’ll be making faces 😂😂😂

[@sattasana7753]

😂😂😂😂

[@Sandy-of6gq]

I agree. I'd be like ok bye smh after 5 minutes

[@oyandakona5994]

Give it a try lol

[@mimi.w667]

Same id be laughing and shit 😂

[@timbawangu3038]

😂😂😂😂

[@Green_Godess]

This was literally one of my most favourite programmes of all time... still is. Thank you to everyone involved in creating it. Particularly the couples and therapist as they were the most vulnerable and brave in being their most authentic selves.

[@mambostirfry]

First man is obnoxious. If I met him at a party I would spend as much time with him as it takes to say “hello” and “goodbye.”

[@candaces.7547]

I am completely obsessed with this show! Orna is amazing!

[@rossidimitrova756]

The first guy is beyond ridiculous, can’t even listen to him, don’t know how his wife does it. The woman in the clip around 5th minute had contempt for her partner but this clip shows her softer side. Glad they split up.

[@NatalieBoat111]

Oh thank god I was looking to see if they did he's totally exhausting

[@heeeeyjai]

This couple? 5:00?

[@NatalieBoat111]

@@heeeeyjai no the first man in the white shirt who talks about "devastating" not being the right word at 1:00

[@shelleycharlesworth5177]

Here is what I told my partner: As long as you hold MY emotional and physical well-being at the same Level of importance as your own, I promise to share my life with you for as long as I live. To accomplish that I promise to change when our relationship needs me to change and to grow when our relationship needs me to grow. I promise to be more than the partner you need me to be today. I promise to be the partner you need me to be today, tomorrow and in the future. Life is about change and I promise to change. What about you? What can you promise me?

[@teacherspetism]

I love this and I’m single 😂😂. The therapist is amazing…

[@n.g.3741]

@6:42. Nobody has to LET YOU GO. Just get your things and walk. It’s that simple.

[@jlnapoleon]

So true. She has hit rock bottom in that relationship. She needs to realize she can’t ask him to do something she won’t do for herself, love her. Whatever you are asking him to do get x/drugs out your life, you get it out your life by leaving him. If you won’t get it out your life how can you ask him to get it out your life. Love yourself let go of the guilt for surviving your childhood and leaving unhealthy people behind. You can’t save them and stop being afraid to go be with healthy people. We can do it even though it’s not our comfort zone, YET! Don’t feel any guilt, he absolutely doesn’t care, if anything he only think he does. Beautiful boy tho 100% child

[@whiskeralla3084]

Hey do you know which episode that clip is from? I wanted to hear more of her story because I felt like I was listening to myself talk hearing her. Please let me know if you know

[@diamonddusk008]

​@@whiskeralla3084it's from season 3

[@phoebeel]

I remember watching this series and the first guy from this clip just annoyed me SO MUCH. Girl, I get that he's a silver fox and that you have history but please for the love of god, try finding someone who is less abrasive. This dudes whole purpose of existence is to argue.

[@loremipsum685]

ready for a new season

[@NickolasVickors]

The lesbians at the end wore me OUTTT.

[@NC-qc7wd]

I must say, I am thoroughly captivated by this show. As a child, I was often asked what I aspired to become when I grew up. I considered pursuing a career as either a psychiatrist or an architect. In hindsight, I may have chosen the wrong path. Although I practiced elements of psychiatry in my work as a designer, I find the complexities of the human mind and personality to be far more intriguing. This looks very interesting.

[@arturoBbrito]

When people ask for change rebuttal with this: “change for or with you?” Usually if pop a bubble of self interest before he or she make a decision.

[@princepeterwolf]

Sadly I know that kind of man (first one), it's completely useless, you'll never, ever, ever win with that kind of man. Give up. Don't hope, don't try to make it work, it's NEVER going to work. Man like that leave a trail of suffering behind him.

[@millie9814]

The Asian lady and the blonde guy, UGH, he is sitting there, listening to her pour her heart out, he is not offended, he is not giving her comfort, he is not making facial expressions, you just HAVE NO IDEA what the guy is thinking, he is just staring at her like a wall, it's no wonder she feels this way!

[@segamai]

The amount of straight men I know that are EXACTLY like that. Gurl.

[@millie9814]

@@segamai It goes from unpleasant to infuriating real fast

[@RalfNLBLN]

I mean, I guess thats why they are in therapy. Cant blame them for trying, but some people are just so extremely detached/unemotional/unempathic, that no amount of therapy can fix

[@seanlenihan1788]

I feel like he was just listening intently to what she was saying

[@RalfNLBLN]

@@seanlenihan1788 it does, but no way to know without any verbal or nom verbal reaction.

[@sommerhughes9489]

Relationships..such a beautiful way to understand where your work lies ❤

[@gareztakat5356]

This series was AMAZING!!!

[@sameoldsameold264]

That second couple, is that the woman who calls him at work 20 times? He's a saint. I could never. This woman is genuinely insane. I don't know why people don't understand personal boundaries.

[@calvthomas6153]

Yes... she irked my spirit so much.

[@jasmineadjei2552]

This show is AMAZING! Love this therapist. Some of these are so hard to watch.

[@angelamadrid50]

One thing that I have learned when I was a teenager is that you can never ever fix someone!

[@Tnc874]

That 1 lady loved that little boy in him and now she hates it BUT she created the dynamic .

[@FocusOnWhatYouLove-t6c]

This show is so good

[@jasmineadjei2552]

How eye opening. Goodness the lady who saw her little self who she wanted to save in her partner. Then when her partner turns into an ideal of a child years down the line she wonders why and doesn’t correlate her reasoning for choosing him. That’s something. Humans we are something.

[@missgeorgia2996]

Love this show……so eye opening in many ways

[@viranjith]

The need to have and control things is the source of all suffering. Let go.

[@SunGathersDust]

7:17 but you decided to mother him and then expected him to be your man. Nah sis, he is not your child, he is a grown man. I think sometimes it's easy to trick ourselves into thinking that that care we give is the care the receiver needs. I wonder of this man has ever felt smothered by her.

[@amarbyrd2520]

It's so irritating when the men laugh when there's something intense & difficult coming out - I understand a bit why they do it, but I'm not sure I understand why they're not often challenged on the incongruity of that response in a situation where the other person is trying to be honest and vulnerable

[@Green_Godess]

The laughter is definitely something to explore as it can denote nerves/discomfort/contempt...

[@RShaun]

When you say incongruity, are you assuming that there is a correct way for emotions to manifest in our bodies involuntarily or do you just not like how it feels to not have us respond in a way you desire and it feels like a punch in the face like from the clip?

[@tylercarter4348]

It's almost like men have been conditioned to not be expressive with their emotions and development coping mechanisms like laughter to survive....

[@mrb4761]

@@RShaun It's neither Maybe don't be so defensive yourself

[@ambergibson7381]

This lady is so DOPE. Shout outs to Orna🤎 & Showtime✌🏼

[@t.wilson7962]

This is my FAVORITE show!!

[@tako_749]

I watched the 4th season in one sitting 👀

[@arunagreen8119]

I've watched the first 3 seasons in a few days. It's so brill. The insights are so amazing and it's really helped me. The way she teases apart motivations and sees what's going on is like magic.

[@Metonymy1979]

I love this show

[@Medallion88_]

I love this show!

[@wf4983]

that is one hard job

[@teneshaanderson4761]

Love Dr Orna

[@jademedorzil2850]

I love this reality show so much also Orna is a great therapist

[@berri6015]

I love this show so much

[@yushikuang7877]

We are in our mid-forty and i get all what those couples are complaining about… my partner a s me are actually consulting also. After few session, all I can say it’s we are have more compassion for the other one, and it has to be BOTH side… a lot of couple will be happier! But in most case, just like the asian lady said, we were very patient in the beginning but after 15, 20 years together… please get your crap together and be a real life partner. No i am the same person, but i have no more patience. Hmmm … i know what to say to my next session.

[@Morenita570]

The Asian woman is fake. She did everything pretending to be Poly, submissive and into sexual things to get that white guy. She started that relationship on a false premise and now she’s whining.

[@bjwhetstone5717]

Various examples of people getting in their own way.

[@CharisseKenionYT]

Waiting for a new season!

[@LSSYLondon]

The first guy is so right. It's frustrating to be misunderstood. To have words put in your mouth that you didn't say.

[@courtneyjackson7181]

Love this show. It used to be free to watch. I watched the first season and maybe the second one.

[@mariellebraz]

This guy is so egocentric it was hard to watch

[@ellenhenderson6865]

This guy.

[@kal2487]

This is interesting .I don't watch the show, but for anyone who does-- have any of these couples turned it around?

[@laurenallyseM]

Yes.

[@behindthecam5526]

Some yes

[@mrb4761]

In later seasons

[@jeremysmith9694]

Yeah totally. A lot of them. It really opens their eyes to their partners perspectives instead of running with their determined narrative. I love it for that reason.

[@BlueGreenTea]

The first couple separated he got with someone new and said really awful stuff about his ex. His history explains a lot about his behaviour…not excusing him but when you hear his story his attitude is not surprising…he has a lot of defences from an emotionally neglected upbringing

[@sulltk1447]

I loved this series!

[@LawChatsWithMadeline]

5:05 the therapist finally the the second wife in the clip accountable!

[@bronzebond4869]

This show is great. I’ve seen all seasons and it gives me hope for reality tv. Trashy tv is fun and all but this show gives us a dose of realism. This sounds like a corny ad but damn

[@DiamondFae-xd1gm]

Wow, talk about super deep.

[@whiskeralla3084]

5:40 Can someone PLEASE tell me which episode/season covers this particular couple's story? That woman is ME. It felt like I was listening to myself and wanted to watch that episode. Please someone comment it down below

[@moony-_-.]

They’re in season 3! Each season follows a handful of couples though so if you’re only interested in them you’ll have to skip around to their sessions hope this helps :)

[@whiskeralla3084]

@@moony-_-. Thank you!! :)

[@karenmossbryan7932]

I'm tired

[@mrb4761]

Me too - some people are literally exhausting

[@emmajones3484]

This guy exchasting

[@biba350]

Love this show

[@slothrop4751]

Mau - best character on the show

[@KindredSpirit1010]

I should have been a divorce lawyer.

[@heeeeyjai]

Always time

[@monayfromdabay]

why do you say that

[@yveqeshy]

I need to reawtch this show

[@sachalambert5499]

Wow...this guy would have me pulling my hair out.

[@shantiaccount]

What a creeeeeeep.

[@mimieno]

That was my show! Will there be another season?

[@MsKasiulenka]

Omg. This dude

[@nicolem889]

Look at showtime cashing in on the relationship youtube drama

[@cerissabrown3487]

Watching these couples reminds me why my non negotiable core value is a couple that prays and read scriptures together. When we can’t see past ourselves God can help us through his infinite wisdom shared to us through his Holy Spirit that’s inside me and my man.

[@californiacoast7021]

That man who gets up for other people and yet makes wife a third option instead of a priority is probably cheating or interested in other women… He is emotionally unavailable to his wife and she is reactive when it happens

[@sandejessica]

If you watch the season with them, you’ll see that she is extremely triggered by the abandonment and abuse she suffered at the hands of her family and previous partners. He also comes from a generation and family system that never actually held space and actually allowed a masculinity that freely expressed and processed their emotional state. I think in many of these clips, the participants are projecting their own internalized trauma fears and narratives onto others.

[@mbailey9552]

Couple #1 need to end it. This guy has superiority issues, trying to utilize his intelligence but really it's arrogance.

[@PeteMcCorvey]

I read somewhere online that they did end up divorcing.

[@gordythecat]

He is a true narcissist.

[@dancemaniac3868]

That last couple: poly doesn't with unless both are committed to the boundaries set and agreed on. It clearly not working.

[@dosrisus1094]

Where are the cameras?!!

[@talkindurinthemovie]

Id break up 😊 no way i could do this 🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️

[@oyandakona5994]

Me too I aint got time😂

[@MelissaRae1975]

I binged ask 3 seasons!

[@kalankaneni]

It's so sad (and funny) that usually trauma bonds people together not love

[@AlexC-ej6mk]

Are these real sessions? Or reenactments?

[@iadorenewyork1]

They are all too real.

[@prima-madalina]

They’re real 😭

[@TheScottEF]

The actress portraying Dr. Guralnik represents an insightful and informed therapist, but her character does enter the fray with certain biases, as we all do. In real life, I can say with near certainty that coupling will not improve any faster than it is now until there are far more real-life interviews with male couples-therapists, even for the lesbian couple.

[@CairynJay]

I really hope the first dude watches his behaviour back and is extremely embarrassed

[@Hiddengem813]

5:34 that lady is extreme bruh wtf

[@heeeeyjai]

Seriously!!

[@PeteMcCorvey]

Elaine (the second lady) was EXACTLY like my ex. Everything was about her and her alone.

[@heeeeyjai]

Just gross

[@svlagonda7417]

7:15 That is pure abuse from her. He gets to get out of that relationship FAST. When you're at the stage where one person is hurling abuse and insults at the other, calling them names etc that relationship is already FINISHED. Bro needs to get some balls and walk away.

[@lauraparker396]

If you repeat back to someone and it’s never right, that’s a tell for NPD.

[@csmtcqueen]

Nope can't live with somebody like him (first guy). He always has to be right.

[@karenpes7280]

Jesus why did she stay with that first guy

[@ikchuks8214]

The older woman looks like his mother 😅😅

[@iadorenewyork1]

In my opinion, he looks older than his partner.

[@jaybrennan7099]

The 2nd wife is needy, jealous, and codependent if you watch the whole season

[@jenniferh.7219]

1:04 with all to due respect devastating is perhaps not quite the right word or at least she could course correct and adjust. From the remainder that was shown, I wonder if we missed whether the conversation was brought to greater fruition or Revelation or understanding. I wonder if she could benefit from further training on dealing with narcissists & narcissist behaviors in psychotherapy. Hwr, there could have been more (in terms of progress in this conversation or in following conversations) but it wasn't shown

[@sandycheeks1580]

3) The Asian Lady probably pays the bills 💸 & gives him money. She’s an atm and he thinks she’s wrapped around his finger. Until she’s tapped out, he will stay with her. 4) The blond lesbian is reaching out to other women to eventually cheat on her partner. Simple as that!!!

[@dsabre4990]

what a shock....one partner doesn't want to be 'polly" and the other does so the relationship is over.

[@jaybrennan7099]

Don't talk crazy about the 1st guy he knows he has problems, that's why he's there. Give him. Credit for that

[@jeremysmith9694]

Exactly. Annoying or not, he's there. We all have problems.

[@tananario23]

No. He’s there because he’s about to get left.

[@maryangelreviews954]

The 3rd couple, hes not listening NOW

[@MV-xu8xv]

“I need to safe myself.”True dat. Painful. Immature men.😢 Time to move on…

[@Zoomerlaw]

Run run away!!!

[@GoddessHabits]

Guy in the first clip is my ex husband 😂

[@heeeeyjai]

I’m glad he’s your ex 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

[@ellenhenderson6865]

Can you imagine picking a fight with someone because they go to a funeral? Not a strip bar. Not hanging with buds. A funeral.

[@alexandranero4152]

Trauma does insane things to people's sense of logic and reason. She was physically abused by her ex.

[@Cinnamon349]

That was wild what a nightmare to be bullied for going to a funeral

[@PJ-hs5gl]

It’s deeper than that and you’re being a surface level thinker.

[@nataliaalfonso2662]

If someone isn’t ever prioritizing time with their partner, and then is up early to go to the funeral of someone they’ve never met, yes, that’s a valid thing to be hurt by.

[@cheriebenjamin0315]

@@nataliaalfonso2662 If you watch the full season that wasn’t the case though. She was literally taking out her unresolved trauma from her previous abusive relationship out on him.

[@oyandakona5994]

The black lady energy😀

[@jacksteal5991]

Are these real people? Not just actors?

[@susanhughes8549]

Dia duit, I'm not allowed to talk, That's all there is too it........

[@sandycheeks1580]

1) The first guy wants a younger woman! 2) The black guy went to the funeral to see another woman who’s alive. He may have cheated on his wife with The woman that died.

[@plum7t]

For the second man, you have to watch the episode. The lady takes things personally when it is not about her and sees her husband as her body double and when he doesn't do things as she planned he would do, she gets annoyed. Even though she hasn't conveyed expectations to him.

[@guadwin]

Stop while you’re behind