Cursed Mario Products

With the long-awaited Mario Movie around the corner, I thought now would be a great time to take a look at the most cursed Mario products Nintendo ever released.
Thanks alot for watching make sure to stay silly and have a good day!!!
Check out the other cursed products videos: • Hyperfixations
English subtitles made by Caleb B!
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🐦follow on twitter for funnies
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🍩--------------------------------------🍩
🎵Music:
New Super Mario Bros. Soundtrack - Overworld
Check Mii Out Channel - Submission Plaza Music (Extended)
New Super Mario Bros 2 Soundtrack - Beach Overworld (Leaf Beat)
ROBLOX Music - Horror
Single Player Menu - Mario Kart DS OST
Danganronpa 2 OST Let Us Sing of a Hollow Victory
Super Mario 64 Soundtrack - Super Mario 64 (Main Theme)
Mario Kart DS - Figure-8 Circuit
Mario Kart DS [OST] - Banshee Boardwalk (N64)
Mario Kart DS - Frappe Snowland (N64)
Bowser's Castle - Mario Kart Double Dash!!
Yoshi's Island DS Soundtrack - Flower Garden
Title Screen Main Menu (Mario Kart 64)
🍩--------------------------------------🍩
TABLE OF CONTENTS:
0:00 Intro
0:38 Food
4:00 Toys/Misc
7:18 Hotwheels
9:43 Toys/Misc Continued
15:30 Technology
18:02 Outro
🍩--------------------------------------🍩
SUBSCRIBE FOR RANDOM FACES
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🤣😍👍🤑😝😂😎
Like for cookies ;3

[@SensitiveFernn]

The fact that they didn't call the cereal "MariO's" is infuriating

[@natefriends9213]

Maybe they didn’t want people to confuse it with the character Mary O. or the fan game Mari0

[@ra_iningtacos]

Real.

[@GjoobAndSkarmory]

Or call the mario spaghettios mariOs

[@jorbertfivesevenaetree5043]

they arent O's tho

[@GjoobAndSkarmory]

THEY ARE NOW MUAHAHAHAHAHA

[@AngryMunci5]

5:38 “speaking of Mario’s balls” Nothing has ever triggered my fight or flight sense more

[@cj3537]

Couldn't agree more

[@fernandajameus777]

🥲🔫

[@isabeltomala4502]

🥵🥵🤤🤤😫😫😩😩

[@foxneko4465]

​@@isabeltomala4502🙂

[@Oreosaretasty1]

@@isabeltomala4502NAHH 😨💀💀💀💀💀

[@anameraucana1688]

I recently found one of those 2006 Mario balls in my childhood home’s backyard while cleaning underneath the back porch. The thing somehow survived after all this time and it’s been cleaned, but is incredibly faded. The weirdest part is I have zero memory of owning this ball, nor of any family members owning it.

[@insertcreativehandlehere]

r/glitchinthematrix

[@grizzlydino]

I mean, the thing was a Mcdonalds toy so Im guessing you or one of your siblings were younger and got one of these, played with it a couple of times, then it managed to get in your porch, and just forgot about it’s existence and have no memories of owning one. I know I definitely don’t remember half the toys I got from Mcdonalds

[@vctsan3672]

💀 and r/cursedcomments cus the way you didn’t put toy. Edit: Thanks for 3 likes those 3 people😊

[@S113Productions]

Haha, I still have mine, too! Mine still has the colors on it, and looks brand new.

[@whistlemanthatwhistles]

@@S113Productionslegendary ball fr fr

[@corndogbark5915]

Such a shame that the Yoshi egg mug has extra death seasoning on it, I would genuinely use one otherwise . Also, the Mario Kart Hot Wheels have no business being so cute

[@Purplepikmin_AUTTP.]

[@orangetasersauz_]

I feel like this series is slowly going to become polygon's agenda

[@HXGNL_RHMBS]

Yeah

[@ifreeze1678]

true

[@slimeysnail]

Cursed polygon products

[@HXGNL_RHMBS]

@@slimeysnail uh yeah

[@Local_Toaster]

Uh huh yup ya

[@thegorillaman2323]

The progression from cube shaped mugs to a mug that can kill you to a warp pipe mug that is actually a mug is insane!

[@charlesnickolaus4107]

He is referencing Kirby

[@erinpoulson2032]

@charlesnickolaus4107 Uh, no?

[@Astrotitanplays]

lol, a mug that can turn you into a skeleton.

[@user-hb9pg3ho8l]

*A mug that can kill you lol*

[@Satatajoo]

16:11 okey dokey calling "BURGER KING" you got it all set

[@RichWithHate]

“Speaking of Mario Balls,” Is such an unironically hilarious sentence and i love it-

[@Thatwaterfairy2]

My favorite part is when Mario says: “wake up it’s time to leave dreamland!” **funky little Mario tune plays** I want that just so he can say it

[@Sonic.exe_uwu666]

😂

[@tiffanym7580]

0:9

[@labellaella]

"wake up sister it's" ~james charles mario

[@wantedasylum1091]

The voice activated Mario Telephone is by far the most interesting and dynamic piece of technology. Once again Charles Martinet knocks it out of the park. Also Super Mario Galaxy is my favorite Mario game, as well as my first video game ever.

[@SuperJman1111]

Based Mario game choice

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@SuperJman1111]

@@Blint324 You know he asked everyone to stop this like 2 months ago right? That’s long over.

[@levelupsonic]

Common Charles Martinet W

[@VanessaMorales-vg8pi]

​😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂❤

[@Sullivan1845]

1:07 I remember finding this at Stop And Shop and buying it. It's a shame that they stopped producing this, the cereal slapped and the marshmallows gave the milk a berry flavor. Still to this day my favorite cereal.

[@TheANTI-UTTPUnion]

Wake up, its time to leave dreamland! *mario grabs a knife*

[@emmamesser2756]

As an Australian i can confirm that Koala Mario is always waiting for me in the shadows

[@speedfarm7467]

I worked at the Timezone that had it at the front, it’s now at the Coolangatta TZ.

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@Sayia0404]

@@Blint324 ok

[@emmamesser2756]

@Speed Farm i’ve found it now!! such a silly little goober

[@luvbinn3jy]

I found it a few weeks ago in Coolangatta

[@h0tsalsa]

As someone who grew up with a ton of this stuff, I can honestly say the Mario Mac and Cheese slapped. I think they had a Ninja Turtles one too. The fruit snacks were good too. The characters are all from Mario Bros 2.

[@huskyhacker2515]

Do angry birds next!

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@LobsterMobsterTheCrispiestLoaf]

I had a lot of the food products as a little kid, and I remember loving them. Nostalgia...

[@hyliadreamer]

Who did it slap?

[@marcelaavram8763]

​@@huskyhacker2515😊

[@holauuuyyy]

4:40 "The marvel moves way too fast!!!" Gravity : what do you want me to do about it??!

[@oscarGamingYT-iq9lw]

*marble*

[@YourDadIsHereWithTheMilk]

✨mario balls✨

[@ZizZap4]

The gummy box pulling "oddly specific" characters uses box art from Super Mario Bros 2 (the weird one with shy guys and turnip throwing). All of those characters were featured in that game. So I'm thinking it was a promotional thing released alongside SMB2. Edit now that I've watched through: Favorite game: Mario Party DS is a super fun and often overlooked game whose singleplayer campaign has gotten me through two separate longer-term power outages. Favorite product: I had an LED light of one of Racoon Mario's sprites. Loved it since SMB3 on the GBA was my first game. Unfortunately during college moving I forgot I'd left batteries in it so it's a bit corroded now. :/

[@monkey_6391]

dude i LOVED mario party ds back then, and one day i lost the cartridge and was super sad. Bought another about 2 months later though.

[@justmeherethereandeverywhere]

I'll admit I felt old when he said that he didn't recognize those Super Mario Bros. 2 characters.

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@ZizZap4]

@@Blint324 what

[@LobsterMobsterTheCrispiestLoaf]

@Just Me Here It honestly shocked me a little bit at first

[@rankrodent2772]

Dude sounds like he’s on the verge of hysterical laughter throughout the entire video

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@jameshalper5864]

@@Blint324 not funny

[@FPE_Zip]

​@@jameshalper5864fr

[@miramiscoci9827]

7:07 I have the princess Peach set and I can't even look at her when the screens are off

[@calumsanderson6741]

2:07 I'm not the only one who thought the Fire Flower was Squidward at first, right?

[@zeekprado2870]

Yup your the only one

[@ball7781]

​@@zeekprado2870I can't unsee the squidward

[@just_oliwer4581]

5:45 *_"Giant Mario and Luigi Balls"_* _-Polygon Donut, 2023_

[@PolygonDonut]

Truly the quote to lead a generation

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@akirahisui-lucario5636]

5:38 Speaking of Mario Balls

[@vivianamaldonado1525]

​@@Blint324Would Ya Stop With The Waffle House Spam?

[@GreentixxyTheZeldaFan]

@@Blint324the waffle house has found its new clown, YOU.

[@Etnad9000]

14:44 As an Australian i can say this is fact

[@Lunablues23]

Im Australian too and this is true

[@FerrexShelby-ed9hg]

"i love gambling!" 1 minute later "i hate gambling!"

[@Millymullfoxyblueagain]

1:31 Hey wait a minute, it says dinner on the box! 😶

[@9KingP]

Polygon please PLEASE keep using Nene's 144p mp4 of her saying "Yayy" it brings JOY to me seeing that little goofy goober say her iconic line!

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@garebear6967]

AAAAAAAAANONONOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[@FriedCuttlefish]

As an Australian-born Australian I can confirm the Koala Mario theory

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@FriedCuttlefish]

@@Blint324 I figured.

[@FPE_Zip]

​@@Blint324no.

[@somerandomcube]

the mario bath sponge is so cute :D, i love the absolute gooberness emitting from it. also my favorite mario game is mario kart wii :3

[@contentwarningclip621]

8:25 polygon: "uhh because is like cows i guess" *the all mighty powerful cow starts showing up on the screen*

[@sneezyy_]

This is truly one of the Mario videos of all time

[@turkey4802]

IK right

[@twv2753]

It definitely is

[@tatasinho0507]

r/technicallythetruth

[@SakhotGamer]

This is usually said in a way as to say something is mid like the morbius origins it has but the meaning already got lost in translation 💀 This is video is not mid, it is a masterpiece

[@sneezyy_]

@@SakhotGamer when was it ever used to say something was mid bro 💀

[@pup64hcp]

Your genuine enthusiasm in your videos is always really heartwarming. Keep up the good work

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@felixsslutwife]

As an Australian I can confirm that Koala Mario is always with you. You dont know where or when he will show himself. Your only warning is "Yahoo!" echoing across the country at inhumane hours while you sleep

[@643cjon]

13:25 😊 life-changing mug

[@Ollieraccoon]

Finding your channel is something I will never regret.

[@an4rkid]

Yep.

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@Ollieraccoon]

Yey I got a hart :D *heart

[@Danny1th]

@@Blint324 😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐

[@breadcupgaming]

True faxx

[@0ne_eyeYEAAAAH]

My entire immune system when I stub my toe: 13:30

[@pland7114]

3:13 man idk why this hit so hard but it did

[@alotofbambi907]

The telephone got the bombastic sideeye

[@DefinitelyAlive]

mario is truly one of the characters of all time

[@greenbirdstudios3462]

Truly nolen pest control termites

[@virtualcommunities1228]

Mario is all time.

[@Varaluvscats]

Did you know he’s also the number 1 [I forgor] of all time?

[@aklimabegum9795]

Yes ​@@Varaluvscats!

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@jastahooman]

17:00 The thing that you were actually in Kirby's Dream Land but Mario makes you get out while you in the middle of fighting DeDeDe in your dreams

[@usernames68619]

My favorite Mario product is the alarm clock that says "WAKE UP IT'S TIME TO LEAVE DREAM LAND!"

[@PremierWindowtint]

Fr

[@jaimeliotti759]

13:42 I CAN LITERALLY SMELL AND TASTE THE COOKIES

[@DonutBurger]

Wait, the koala Mario is real? All this time, I thought it was some sort of bootleg or something.

[@VictoriaBarrios96]

mee to

[@speedfarm7467]

I worked at the Timezone Arcade that had the Mario Koala statue.

[@myang12003]

That’s probably because it is

[@thetrueandhonestadrianex]

12:20 Fun Fact: these used to play sounds if you pressed either of their noses or emblems. It was most likely 1-1 that it played, but I somewhat remember a voiceline? It gets worse when you break the voicebox and it just spazzes out when you try to press it

[@Potandstew]

I got some news. I have those and I coincidentally broke them because they sounded weird. Also you had to click the m in Mario. Also also my mom thought when I broke it was a rat.

[@thetrueandhonestadrianex]

@@Potandstew LMAO

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@Potandstew]

@@Blint324 the trend is dead

[@Black_men_124]

I have these slippers and I remember them making sounds. I think one of them is a coin block sound or something idk

[@ChuddleScuddle]

>6ixϪhrembo, can't you see? >Polygon Numbnuts needs to drink some pee. >And i just love your gemmy ways >I guess why xer vids are coal and you're so great!

[@Ragnars_a.Christian]

I love his enthusiasm for these "Also their faces are just so goofy lookin' !!!!!1!!"

[@giselletorres4156]

Reminds me of all the Mario themed pinatas, party supplies, brinca brincas, and ceramic piggy banks made by the local vendors every time I visited Mexico. The ceramic Mario always looked a little off but it adds a certain level of charm and nostalgia for me. 😊

[@M50A1]

All that stuff has such a nice charm to it, I love them

[@astriel404]

a

[@TheReesox]

16:08 One even more popular video is the same guy calling "bitch"and the mario figure repeats the insult.

[@sophthetoast1997]

14:11 My sister got me a Mario bath bomb from Lush, and it was a question mark block, and it looked pretty accurate, and it was lemon scented, which was quite nice, but when I put it in the bath tub, it turned the bath water yellow, and that’s when I realized yellow is a funny bath water color, so in conclusion, it’s a pretty good product, but it turns the bath water yellow, which is funny.

[@ItstoadXD]

P tub

[@bobbiejoinscore4903]

1: “you get a cool mug!” 2: 💀

[@comradecat1482]

As someone who has seen the koala Mario multiple times, it is as intimidating as it looks. It threatens to eat your family if you don't donate

[@daviddavis7446]

Too bad, I already ate my family

[@EpicPummelYT]

Loved when Mario said “it’s marioing time” and mario’d all over the place. Truly one of the moments of all time.

[@EpicPummelYT]

Can’t believe pongon hearted my comment

[@AwoofyAnimates]

😐😐😐 how funny

[@SuperJman1111]

This got a heart?!

[@EpicPummelYT]

@@SuperJman1111 yes 🗿🍷

[@EpicPummelYT]

@@SuperJman1111 yes 🗿🍷

[@alexlewis-campbell7585]

The Lego mario gives me mini heart attacks 😂😂.

[@patriceheath9169]

That cursed lego figure of mario with his face is terrifying and scary

[@MeOrgansAreABoilin]

Being able to call burger king by asking Mario is something I would never get in my life even if I wanted it

[@sunshinecolaa]

excited for the next cursed products video where polygon donut rates the most concerning items known to man

[@VictoriaBarrios96]

atonic bonmnb?

[@sunshinecolaa]

@@VictoriaBarrios96 you read my goddamn mind

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@Gosh..]

6:02 NPC moment

[@jaceyjohnson8922]

Why are you making fun of an average person?

[@-ASTRAL.GREMLINS-]

6:18 its true i didn't find any listings for the mario can puzzle😰

[@Chipper179]

Because of how rare it is

[@trevorfredrickson]

11:06 Bro, man really just turned into Luigi

[@BugsyFoga]

"If you do drugs you'll go to hell before you die....please" - Mario

[@carlosemilio5180]

RIP in Pepperoni Captain Lou (He did not go to hell before or after death)

[@evanorsomething]

You might not see this, but bro i love your videos. I dont really know how to describe this well but your editing style and the constant random jokes and funny voices makes it feel like a visual and audio representation of my adhd Like, watching your vids, you seem like the type of person I would really get along with

[@MissPaulingnyancatlolz]

For the wake up from dreamland Mario alarm is from super mario 3. Super Mario 3 also had its own show so the company that made the clock probably got a voiceline from the actor, who sounds way different than the mario now

[@EdgarTheFan]

at 00:16:52 mario says "wake up it's time to leave dreamland" and dreamland is a level in a game called kirby

[@defaultprofilepictureguy2526]

yeah?

[@carlosdelaguerra8302]

You can really tell right away when companies have absolutely no idea how a character exactly looks like based on their looks shapes and colors

[@NerdTheDemon]

This happens to me as well when I created my characters for a video games. I made overworld sprites for them, and then when I made portraits I had no idea how to make their faces look based on the sprites.

[@sophs1822]

2:16 got me dying

[@dergs_and_stuff]

5:18 Funnily enough, my grandparents actually used to have one of those Mario balls when I was younger.

[@NubleDoesStuff]

"One: Cool yoshi mug!!! :D Two: 💀"

[@liamemery1148]

5:24 ITS A ME A BALLIO

[@Xoinks]

I swear I remember having this Luigi plush where the mustache was taken off or something?? And he just looked really really weird lmao

[@Akuma_L0L.]

12:19 These slippers had a button on them that played the overworld theme. Peak nostalgia as I used to have a pair of these

[@JulesBluefoot-jy5bx]

The "Who is Mario's brother, uhhhh" got me DYING!! 🤣🤣🤣

[@MCisverygood]

still can't believe they made a whole franchise based off of chris pratt

[@PolygonDonut]

Truly one of the franchises of all time

[@kitpup_13]

@@PolygonDonut NO WAYY A JACK BLACK BREATHING FIRE TOY IS OUT

[@jaceyjohnson8922]

Who would name their child after a deep fried rodent?

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@kitpup_13]

@@Blint324 shut up ts dead now

[@tysm8550]

I had so many Mario toys, games, and items back when I was a kid. It's good to see that some of them were featured in the video. If one of those items appeared on screen I said to myself "Hey, I had that!". Well done with the video man. I hope you talk about transparent technology next!

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@Tersudo]

@@Blint324 bro that gigs up now you can quit

[@AquaFanx]

There should be an alarm clock that’s just Mario BLJing up stairs with the alarm sound just being the sound of a BLJ

[@Thunderboltgaming-in5il]

You know what is makes me want cursed sonic products, that’s what he should do next

[@thetus321]

8:31 THE DANCEING COW NOT AGAIN

[@ibisgamer2281]

These are definitely some of the Mario's of all time

[@ItsVero_]

10:23 pongon caught swearing :OOOO

[@Hahahahahahahaha4]

The Mario alarm clock that’s like wake up it’s time to leave dreamland was way too hilarious

[@ZeekkoW]

17:10 the fact that it says "wake up its time to leave DREAM LAND" and this came out when kirby's dream land 1 came out makes it funny to me idk

[@MrBenMcLean]

On "Wake up: it's time to leave dream land!": The sound of Mario's voice was not defined as the high pitched squeaky thing we know today until Mario 64 in 1996. If you look at the Mario cartoons that were made at the time that alarm clock was released, that voice was the voice of Mario at the time. He was an Italian-American plumber from Brooklyn. Also, "dream land" is probably a reference to Kirby's Dream Land.

[@insertcreativehandlehere]

Or dream land could be referring to your dreams

[@kardelenkoc9746]

your videos are just joyful and i started to rewatch them when i feel horrible 😊 also i never remember what these weird products were so it's like watching for the first time 😅

[@-FileNotFound-]

I actually had that mushroom tin, the green one to be spesific. The last time I had it all the stuff in it grew moldy and I don't know why.

[@blinky6254]

15:27 "Ayo we in da jungle" *Skree

[@goldtheostrich]

LOL

[@BrunoTheTuber]

EE

[@sweetserenitymoonternayaje8217]

6:59 his eyes also follow u wherever u go into ur soul

[@BaldisBloxxin]

Mario Phone: Hey! Who do you want to call? Guy: Burger King. Mario Phone: Oki Doki! Calling- *Burger King*

[@cntoesussie5875]

5:19 i have found this in my house before, but have never figured out its origins. Turns out that’s it’s from about 18 years ago, before i was born. thank you for finally solving this mystery for me

[@noyz-anything]

imagine mario, before he got thrusted into the mushroom kingdom, walking into a customer's house to fix their sink or something, and then he sees that the customer's house is filled with cursed mario merch

[@Ariiiii777]

Ain't no way I'm letting that mario shower bottle thing stare at while I'm showering 💀

[@dexterdexter8208]

In general, there’s no way I’m having any character-themed shower items looking at me when I am trying to clean myself

[@cast_iron_skillet]

This new Mario movie is 🔥🔥

[@phonegingi]

there are several family photos in my house with Mariorb in the background. we kept him on the shelf above the couch for years

[@kingrat9579]

I loved seeing the sus luigi toy in the lineup! We have him on the desk at work, I love looking at his odd expression whenever I'm there

[@vannillaajofficial204]

9:59 was he not already the queen of entire series?

[@PolygonDonut]

WE LOVE LUIGMI!!!! :D

[@vannillaajofficial204]

@@PolygonDonut do we not love luigi? also thanks for noticing my comment :D

[@princenot]

@vannillaAJofficial204 no, LUIGMI

[@vannillaajofficial204]

@@princenot o yea ii forgor about thath

[@alexanderman31]

Gotta be honest, Luigi’s better than Mario

[@katrinasaffarek4212]

The LEGO Luigi is even more scary

[@RealDoox]

if you push the top of the mario slipper specifically on the mario and luigi looking up slippers, the overworld jingle from mario plays

[@LunarianRhapsody]

Honestly, this videos are some of the on youtube that just brighten up my day when watching them, just the pure love for what is going on really warms my heart. Keep up the good work!

[@Blint324]

The Waffle House has found its new host.

[@krystalclouds]

9:10 kids, don’t gamble listen to poingy scrounge dontude!!!!

[@krystalclouds]

💀

[@Mr.Sprite2631]

I actually had the Mario and Luigi slippers, but there was a feature to the Mario one. I don’t know why they didn’t do Luigi, but when you press the M on Mario’s hat it plays the Mario world 1-1 theme and I thought that was really cool when I was little

[@Wolfdog992]

“Mario balls” You need to make cursed Kirby products And also, I live in Australia and we tell campfire stories about Koala Mario. We all have nightmares about him.

[@aimbot4arrowz982]

cursed kirby products are on a WHOLE other level of cursed most of the time.

[@trevorboywill7390]

bro so life changing 13:24

[@aidanpkellyconvoy]

5:50 he looks like he's planning an evil scheme

[@ROFL7000]

He does

[@StinkySeaGoat]

Dude, those 3D gummies were the shit, I’mma find out how to make my own

[@weirdly304]

I had one of those tins of genric candies in the mushroom tin.(green to be specific) But it was so hard to open I opened it with so much force that all the candy exploded out onto the groud. It was a very sad moment, might have cried. :(