David's Depersonalization Recovery Story (2024)

02:26 'The 1st Blip of DPDR'
05:24 'Nothing feels real here'
09:24 'This wasn't just depression'
12:16 'My psychiatrist Googled DPDR'
15:50 Describing the symptoms
19:34 My sister the psychiatrist
21:43 Does Trauma Cause Depersonalization?
27:50 The Body Keeps The Score
32:07 The Maudsley Clinic
35:10 Depersonalization Triggers
38:34 Feelings Of Disconnection
40:30 Research around DPDR
45:00 The DP Manual
48:50 In a Coma or Purgatory
50:11 More Researching DPDR
55:31 'You're paying someone and the clock is ticking'
58:36 What Does Depersonalization Recovery Feel Like?
1:01:02 "I'm over that thing I was going through"
1:03:30 'You have to ignore to move on'
1:05:56 Downplaying your progress helps your progress!
1:07:12 Life After Depersonalization
⚡ Start YOUR 💯 recovery from DPDR today! 👉🏼 www.dpmanual.com/purchase/
⭐ 1-on-1 DPDR Coaching 👉🏼 www.dpmanual.com/coaching/
Connect with The DP Manual! 👉🏼
/ depersonalization_manual
/ depersonalizationmanual
/ dpmanual
For 17 years David (43) struggled with Depersonalization Disorder. He describes 'thinking that nothing was real, feeling like I may have been in a coma, and that there was a constant screen between me and the world."
But thankfully, David has finally recovered! I was thrilled to recently receive an email from David where he said: "I did your course and after 17 years of DP I’m free from it. 'Thank you' doesn’t quite capture my gratitude."
In this brand new extended interview David tells me all about his experience with and recovery from Depersonalization Disorder.

[@marcelblade]

I'm 45 struggling with dpdr episodes from the age of 16 due to a bad weed experience. My dpdr luckily wasn't constant but episodes of very heavy dpdr, slow Recovery followed bij a couple of years normality. My last episode was end of February this year, this time I came across the dpdr manual, bought it and man this is such a blessing, directly started applying the rules, never had such a quick recovery, stil have some bad days, but just the knowledge that this is an anxiety triggered condition gives me so much relief. I always thought that the existential thoughts where my problem and the dereialization was a separate symptom. So glad I came across the manual. Best regards Marcel The Netherlands

[@Dpmanual]

Thanks for your comment Marcel, I'm delighted to hear you're doing so well and that The DP Manual was helpful 👍❤And if you'd ever like to have your story featured on the channel just drop me a line! 😊

[@marcelblade]

@Dpmanual hey Shaun, I wil think about it.

[@MachNichtAufTeuer]

How Long was your longest episode?

[@user-zr3lk6uj1r]

​@@Dpmanual A question for my brother, I am a student in a critical stage. Is the pressure of studying going to be okay? Does this mean I should continue my studies or should I ease off a little because it affects me?

[@Dpmanual]

@@marcelblade Thanks Marcel 😊🙏

[@erb9956]

If he was feeling this way for 17 years and didn't give up, i can do this too. I'm depersonalized for 8 months now. Hearing this story i know that i can recover. Glad you did it man

[@tlee62]

I’m at 4 years now ❤

[@davidmachale6955]

You can do it too. 17 years was horrific but once it goes it goes. I never thought I would break it. Never give up hope.

[@tlee62]

@@davidmachale6955 thanks for those words. I haven’t given up hope but I’m resigned to it now. Life still goes on and I don’t notice it all the time its like an annoying little brother 🤣🙏🏻🙏🏻

[@userjeremysheeran]

i mean, some homosapiens dont find a way or something to do these days. this old boring education system and standard office jobs etc are not compatible with intelligent monkeys’ nature. so these monkeys then have problems. so many things are wrong and not compatible with human nature and earth nature.

[@erb9956]

​@@davidmachale6955 So the manual was worth it? I'm asking because i'm afraid that it won't help me and i will be still struggling.

[@riccardoaddis5746]

David you really are a Hero for surviving 17 years with this thing without a day of being normal, I am deeply Happy that you have finally your Life back.

[@lu2606]

hey thanks,but the main question for me is how ignore the sensations when you can't distract? job,walking on the street,running,being in nature,in a grocery etc?? forced to look triggers and can't avoid it

[@jessicaranee8646]

I’m still fighting here…10 years and still dealing with it. I will make it! It’s been day in and out, not even a break.

[@Dpmanual]

Don't worry Jessica, it doesn't matter what caused it, how long it’s lasted, or whether it’s been 24/7 or episodic, you can always switch DPDR off completely by stopping the anxiety that's causing it 😊 Read this carefully: www.dpmanual.com/articles/how-long-does-depersonalization-last/

[@davidmachale6955]

I highly recommend the DP manual. I wish I had tried it earlier.

[@ca7582]

Ok that's it, I'm short on cash but I'll save some this month to buy the manual

[@yermach6837]

Thank you so much!

[@Dpmanual]

❤️😊❤️

[@karencardozo7203]

Thank you for sharing.

[@Dpmanual]

😊🙏😊

[@Carodiconda1]

Thanks Shaun! You are a blessing 😊❤🎉

[@Dpmanual]

Happy to help 😊

[@user-zr3lk6uj1r]

​@@DpmanualA question for my brother, I am a student in a critical stage. Is the pressure of studying going to be okay? Does this mean I should continue my studies or should I ease off a little because it affects me?

[@Dpmanual]

@@user-zr3lk6uj1r I'd suggest continuing with your studies as best you can, live your life as normal. Focus your attention away from the anxiety and onto your studies 😊 And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR 👍

[@user-zr3lk6uj1r]

Iam good now can you say iam back normal ​@@Dpmanual

[@Jalubiegazz]

Thank you for these materials, it helps a lot that people have same issues that me

[@Dpmanual]

Glad they've been helpful 😊

[@slv6470]

Thank you for this!!!! 💕 also appreciate anyone whos joining the videos, verys sensitive subject, im happy its talked about

[@Dpmanual]

Glad you enjoyed it 😊

[@neo23thirty-eight]

Great interview, thank you for sharing. So happy that you are feeling well again!!!

[@Dpmanual]

Glad you enjoyed it 😊

[@davidmachale6955]

Thank you so much for the kind comment.

[@solomeen6512]

hey shaun… my anxiety’s gone away pretty completely but things still dont look normal. i go out to see people but being with my friends just doesnt make me happy. nothing’s really as enjoyable as it once was (ive pretty much been struggling with anhedonia). i talk to people and just zone out, they just look weird. it doesnt even make me anxious or scared anymore, just sad. constantly uncomfortable. i cant enjoy the good weather, i feel like i live in my head and my world always just shrinks to the room im in.

[@bobtim1008]

Same bro I’ve had dpdr three times in my life this is good progress just keep doing what you’re doing

[@davidmachale6955]

Sounds like the DP thoughts are still there. Keep on working to stop the habits of focusing on thoughts

[@Mudecomigo]

That’s because you are still researching about it, talking about it, thinking about it… my best advice would be change your KZbin and Google account, block the word “depersonalization” and all other mental health related topics. NEVER search about it again. I’ve been 5 years without any symptoms and I manage to do that because I didn’t search about it anymore. It’s not something you can solve by thinking about it, it something that cures itself when you are distracted and focused on something else. It’s hard asf but you need to control yourself and not search about it anymore

[@solomeen6512]

@@Mudecomigo im doing just that :) im getting obsessed with shows, video games, fashion again!!! i feel like im making huge progress and even if its not perfect im happy with myself

[@Mudecomigo]

@@solomeen6512 THATS AWESOME TO HEAR MAN, that’s exactly what you need to recover. As strange as this may sound you need to ignore it and keep doing activities that you like 👍

[@GaDoBiMi]

Ich habe es vor einer Woche geschafft 🙏 Bin wieder befreit 💪 Man kann das schaffen, vertraut mir. Es hat bei mir 2 Monate gedauert.🎉

[@mahmoudelsaraf1094]

How please

[@GaDoBiMi]

@@mahmoudelsaraf1094 Mache viel Sport, Suche dir einen Therapeuten oder sogar eine stationäre Therapie, wichtig ist, dass du kämpfst. Glaub mir, du kannst das schaffen 💪 Depressionen oder Angststörungen sind meistens die Grundlage für solche Symptome. Versuche unter Menschen zu kommen, die vielleicht auch gerade eine schwere-Zeit durch machen, daher empfehle ich eine Psychosomatische Therapie (stationär). Das war jetzt meine zweite DPDR-Episode.

[@Sprunkzz]

Irgendwelche Tipps?

[@Dpmanual]

⚡ Start YOUR 💯 recovery from DPDR today! 👉🏼 www.dpmanual.com/purchase/ ⭐ 1-on-1 DPDR Coaching 👉🏼 www.dpmanual.com/coaching/

[@samuelrodrigues8120]

Shaun, can you tell me if it's a problem for me to read a book called 'One Day Without Complaining'? It's about gratitude. I'm wondering because I might associate gratitude with my good days, and I'm not sure if that gratitude would be a positive thing or not... Also, I want to thank you for all the help you've given us! You're awesome. Your book has been really helpful to me.

[@iamthefiremanjj]

its crazy how everyone goes down the same rabbit wholes with these.... the thing is the way to recover is to create habits and an environment that is conducive to relaxing the body

[@THEREALJ.A]

A question for you Shaun if you see this, I’ve been struggling with DR/DP for 3 possibly 4 years and I’ve watched a couple of your videos and you nailed it with all my thoughts and symptoms. Normally that would be a massive relief knowing those explanations but I’m struggling to find hope for myself because I can’t for the life of me remember what I felt like before I got DP. It makes me feel like I won’t ever escape how I feel because I won’t have any idea when it goes away. My mind seems so rooted in living with it I can’t imagine life without it. Any advice for me?

[@riccardoaddis5746]

Your doubts are all cleared in the manual, don't worry and live your Life distracting yourself at all times.

[@notjaybtw6608]

@@riccardoaddis5746 i havent yet purchased the manual mostly because im almost fully recovered but why distract so much? I hear people saying that so much that you should distract at all times and I get that you shouldnt give yourself time to think ab it but I see the thoughts and let them pass and not interact further with my anxious thoughts. In the manual does it say to distract at all times but then what do you do when u cant ?

[@riccardoaddis5746]

​@@notjaybtw6608you can Always distract yourself and not feed the thought pattern of DPDR

[@Loves839]

I feel lightheaded. I cant feel my brain. I feel very light. Like my mind doesnt exist. How to cure this??

[@Dpmanual]

Don’t worry, feelings like that are super common with DPDR. I know they can be frustrating but they will fade away and stop as you recover 😊 www.dpmanual.com/about/do-i-have-depersonalization-disorder/

[@felbaud]

I wonder if the French dp manual can help ? I see a psychologist about general anxiety self love and confidence But in France no specialist about DP :(

[@Dpmanual]

Hi Félix, The DP Manual comes with a complete French translation 🇫🇷 😊 www.dpmanual.com/purchase/ And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.

[@user-zr3lk6uj1r]

A question for my brother, I am a student in a critical stage. Is the pressure of studying going to be okay? Does this mean I should continue my studies or should I ease off a little because it affects me?

[@Dpmanual]

You should aim to live your life as normal, focus your attention on your studies instead of constantly on anxiety 😊 And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.

[@user-zr3lk6uj1r]

When do I know dpdr that become is dangerous for me?

[@iamthefiremanjj]

Some comments are so funny. You can fully recover . The only time i ever experience anything remotely close now is when i over do caffeine and over push my body.... then ill feel some anxiety at night etc... and if i sleep bad. This stuff is normal and temporary

[@Dpmanual]

Glad to hear you're doing so well 😊

[@mahamasim8943]

Is it normal when person is healing and he hasn’t have any dp or dr episodes in 3 days and he’s happy but at the same time he’s a little anxious that he’s not feeling any dpdr feelings not any anxiety and not any panic attacks. He feels like maybe his emotions are numb or brain got numb. Is it what usually happens when healing ?

[@davidmachale6955]

I found I didn’t want to get too excited when symptoms were going away in case I jinxed it. I think it’s normal to downplay the excitement

[@user-sy1hh8dd4f]

why cant i perceive anything? its like i cant even see. what is this? sometimes i think my sight is completely gone. its like i cant tell if i have eyes or not. why?

[@davidmachale6955]

These are thoughts that are common in DP. Feeling your sight is off or if perception is going is a really common symptom. It’s anxiety and thoughts in DP. I experienced it. It’s awful. But you can overcome it.

[@arianabliss9043]

I’ve had this for 20 long and hard years, same age as David and same industry. Did he have derealisation as well as depersonalisation? I have mostly DR and also DP but I find DR so much scarier. I also have a huge amount of trauma and anxiety spanning a good 25 years. I desperately want to get better and losing hope too. Can people like me get better?

[@Dpmanual]

Remember that ultimately DP and DR are both symptoms of anxiety, and that in order to get rid of them you do need to address and understand both properly, and the underlying anxiety that’s causing them 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-and-derealization-whats-the-difference/

[@davidmachale6955]

Yes I had both. The feeling of observing myself lessened over time, but to Shaun’s point they are both symptoms of anxiety. You can get better if I did. The big takeaway is that all of this is an OCD thought and breaking that thought kills the experience.

[@maleehashahid6522]

Are feelings of deja vu common with dpdr. I feel like i have felt all this before .

[@solomeen6512]

it might honestly be true. you can have experienced dpdr before and not thought anything of it, the thing that makes us spiral now is overthinking it.

[@maleehashahid6522]

@@solomeen6512will it go away 😖

[@solomeen6512]

@@maleehashahid6522 all the symptoms go away with time :) im also having trouble convincing myself that ive ever felt normal but its irrational, like most dpdr fears. all the deju vu and the weird thoughts go away faster the less u focus on them

[@davidmachale6955]

Deja vu happens but I think you it feels more significant with DP because you can’t trust reality. I recommend the course and once you break the thought habit it goes away forever imo.

[@batucalisthenics2812]

Shaun, I am using medication, will it help?

[@Dpmanual]

I'm not a medical professional so can't give you specific recommendations re medication. But please read this article, I think you'll find it useful: www.dpmanual.com/articles/can-medication-cure-depersonalization/

[@dimetrodon2250]

I don’t know if what I’m going through really is depersonalization. Will this still help me? It felt like it sometimes, but other times it feels like I don’t have some of the symptoms people talk about. I don’t feel afraid of looking at myself in the mirror, or afraid of existential thoughts themselves. I’m getting random flashes to memories of my past, while also feeling like my memories are faded and fuzzy. I’m unable to feel anything towards my special interests, other than that I know I’m supposed to like them, even though I’ve seen plenty of people say they are able to use their favorite hobbies/interests as distractions to help get over it, and I feel like the last time I went through this 3 years ago, I did have those more classic symptoms. As for the symptoms that do line up, I feel like the human condition feels foreign, like I can’t even begin to comprehend real life problems, my cognition has taken a hit, I’m having problems remembering things, I feel emotionally numb, a lack of empathy in being able to comprehend regular problems or relate to others (real or fictional), I don’t feel anxiety towards things I normally would (talking on the phone, social situations, money issues), I can’t get excited or enjoy things right now, I have these existential sensations when trying to relate to the things I want to enjoy (especially if there’s some level of violence involved, even if that violence is campy, humorous, combat from a videogame or DnD, an epic fight scene, just a part of nature or from a documentary, or even if it’s meant to be intense/upsetting), I feel desensitized to things that I would normally find upsetting, I have no/numbed emotional connection to my older memories, I can’t really get into anything that gives off more complex emotions or is meant to make you think (although I did in the past). I feel like I’m not as punctual or on top of things as I was before. Im afraid of losing some of my interests, simply from taking too long to recover and the interest fading over time. I’ve ended up dropping interests that I haven’t engaged with in a while all the time, so it’s a legitimate concern for me. Sometimes this feels more like depression, or just intrusive thoughts, I feel like I can’t get engrossed in stories or games, or other things I enjoy, or empathize/feel connected to other people/characters/situations I used to find relatable, or my sense of humor or seriousness even when I don’t feel any anxiety at all. Even when I don’t have any random intrusive or obsessive thoughts. Last time I went through this, I do believe that I didn’t come out unscathed, and that my memories from before my first time were still somewhat dull and emotionally distant, and that my personality might not have been entirely the same before and after.

[@davidmachale6955]

The DP manual is only focused on solving DP. I’m no psychologist but what you describe sounds like depression which I experienced before. I’d recommend reaching out to a professional for help with that.

[@dimetrodon2250]

@@davidmachale6955 it’s probably a co-morbidity between the two conditions. Reality still feels warped and looks strange and the wrongness behind a lot of feeling out my interests feels more existential in nature. There were/are also times of extreme panic and anxiety where it feels like I’m becoming another person altogether, or developing a split personality, or fearing that I’ll turn into an emotionless sociopath, or that my brain is straight up damaged and forever changed, or that I’m going insane, and I have plenty of intrusive thoughts, existential thoughts (usually revolving around death and violence and what’s okay/not okay/funny/sad/whatever) panicked fears, and anxiety attacks. As well as random memory flashbacks. Plus I feel totally dissociated all the time, and my brain is constantly flowing through what if scenarios. I feel like my connection to my interests and hobbies are stuck behind glass, and I feel that way physically too. I have tingly anxiety brain buzzes. I also feel like my personality itself is gone, like I’m not a person at all anymore, like I suddenly can’t understand basic human interaction, like I have to analyze myself and what things I actually liked and why. I feel like random things give me panic attacks, like people just talking about normal things, seeing my special interests and feeling a disconnect, anything even slightly emotionally complex, anything ti do with relating to autistics/ADHDrs, most things even remotely involving death or violence (even in a comedic way) This doesn’t feel like usual depression, but if it also doesn’t sound like usual DPDR, then I’ll take your word for it. Plus this all sort of started with a drug incident (re taking anxiety/adhd meds that I was out of for a week, at a different time than usual, with a cold, and then staying up all night watching… deviant adult material… and then in a sleepless, sick, and deviant porn addled stupor, deciding to take night time cold medicine that night at the same time as the night pill, and then waking up at 1:00pm without any usual connection to my interests or reality and constant what ifs buzzing around in my brain) If it is true, then it is likely that the conditions are likely feeding eachother. The very sudden disconnect from my interests and fear of DPDR’s return fueling my anxiety and pushing me deeper into DPDR, and my DPDR symptoms making me feel a sense of hopelessness and fueling my apathy/lack of empathy and connection, fueling the depression. There’s also the angle that I feel like I’m rejecting the part of myself that was interested/turned on by the deviant stuff in the first place.

[@davidmachale6955]

@@dimetrodon2250 this is really useful. What you describe sounds exactly like DP and the early days of it, which are the worst. I can only talk about my own experience which started out as depression and DP. The depression was the lack of interest in anything, the DP was the weirdness…the checking of reality, feeling like you’re behind a glass pane or observing myself talking. That’s kind of what I describe in the video. The good news is that you are aware that your thoughts are not right. People are unaware that these are thoughts in other serious mental illnesses - Shaun covers this in DP manual. I think the DP manual will really help. My only advice might be to try to get yourself into a “good place” before you start it If I think back as to how intense the depression and DP was for me at the start, I’m not sure I’d be open and able to understand what’s going on in the manual.

[@konstadinop8012]

35 years nonstop here! I don't know how it is to be normal

[@Dpmanual]

Don't worry, it doesn't matter what caused it, how long it’s lasted, or whether it’s been 24/7 or episodic, you can always switch DPDR off completely by stopping the anxiety that's causing it 😊 Read this carefully: www.dpmanual.com/articles/how-long-does-depersonalization-last/

[@user-hj9ws4cl3e]

Pray to god and repent your sins and ask god for healing and worship Jesus Christ

[@UriahWarner]

@@user-hj9ws4cl3erespectfully I have had it for five years as a Christian and have prayed countless times that don’t work

[@davidmachale6955]

@@user-hj9ws4cl3e eh no. That doesn’t work for DP. Tried it.

[@lu2606]

@@user-hj9ws4cl3e works for one person and does not works for 100.000 xd the healing is random

[@jacobaragon3398]

Idk if im recoverd and now i feel like ive been traumatized and like looking at reality and life differently please tell that im still going through dpdr

[@AC--13000]

dpdr is just ocd and one of the obsessive thoughts is that you see reality differently or you have altered your brain or that you are a different person. I had those too but by following the right instruction it left in 4 months

[@jacobaragon3398]

@@AC--13000 thank you so much needed to hear that

[@jacobaragon3398]

@@AC--13000 also can you give me some tips how to recover please

[@AC--13000]

@@jacobaragon3398 of course, so basically what dpdr is a type of ocd that gets triggered by trauma, anxiety, ptsd, and head injuries. There are two types of obsessive thoughts that you’ll have fears of feeling depersonalized and fears of derealisation. Because it’s ocd these are no the only obsessive thoughts you’ll be having. You might think that you are a different person or crazy existential thoughts or that your going crazy and manyyyy other things. It’s normal to have those fears but the way ocd works is that these fears become much stronger in your mind because you keep obsessing over them. If you ask a person without ocd or any anxiety disorder about these feelings they will brush off those thoughts in seconds while you keep obsessing over them for weeks or even months. The most important thing is to drop your anxiety levels. maybe take some medication that helps with it. Find a good psychiatrist and inform him so that he can perscribe you zoloft. Very efficient in ocd and depression and anxiety.Start a healthy lifestyle , socialize more, eat well, exercise, start caring for yourself, take supplements , and most importantly remind yourself that you are ok and all those “feelings" and thoughts and fears are just ideas and they can’t hurt you. Once you stop caring you will get through this. FORGET ABOUT IT ACT LIKE ITS NOT EVEN THERE( even if you think it’s is there) it will eventually go away. The way it goes is like a wave that gets bigger some times and smaller sometimes and eventually it just becomes a straight line. also stop reading about it talking about it and generally thinking about it. I know it’s hard very hard but i managed to do it and you must too. Dwelling on it just gives it more power and makes it more present. ITS FAKE ITS NOT REAL ITS ALL IN YOUR HEAD STOP THINKING YOU HAVE SAMOTHUNG WRONG WITH YOU. YOU HAVE NOTHING!

[@mahamasim8943]

Is brain fog common with dpdr? I just feel I can’t process my thoughts I feel stuck in the morning and feel like that’s something wrong in my brain. Is brain fog dangerous ?

[@ivanruncak327]

Not at all, any symptom you feel with DPDR isnt, wasnt and never will be dangerous, you just feel danger is all around even though it isnt, dont worry it will pass.

[@diartahazrolli9411]

@@ivanruncak327Dp means that your are disconnected from your old self , i feel like i’m not myself like my memories are gone , no emotions , not connected with my old life i feel strange and lost like living in a dream and everything is foggy . Is like i’m disconnected from my identity

[@ivanruncak327]

@@diartahazrolli9411 again completely okay, scientifically- one part of your brain is less active than the other, practically- it is normal mechanism and it will pass, just focus on different things

[@Dpmanual]

Don't worry, brain fog / concentration / memory issues are very common with DPDR 😊 I know they can be frustrating but they will fade away and stop as your recovery continues: www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-and-memory-loss/

[@diartahazrolli9411]

@@ivanruncak327believe me i’m trying my best but i feel so weird and it makes me feel a littel bit scary because it’s like my mind is so distanc and is like it’s not mine . Why i can’t think and i feel so far with myself

[@user-xz6vn4sk5n]

it seems better to me. not to add 17 years. Do you know how much fear that evokes?

[@freeviebee]

I think it’s great for those who suffer for a long time to see it will always go away if you take it on the right way. ☺️ no matter how many years…

[@davidmachale6955]

I wanted to let long term sufferers know that there’s hope. I thought I would be stuck with this forever. I appreciate could scare people to say it could last 17 years but regardless of length I think there’s always hope.

[@stephzinsmeister662]

Self induced

[@Bullshitcs]

Shaun i have a question. Do you think there is different "levels" of dpdr? For example for me i dont have feelings of unreality (if i have its mild(?)), i dont have feelings of being trapped on my body. But i do have like my feelings are kinda muted, short memory issues, blurry vision(normally at night), lack of concentration/problem solving. Do you recognize these symptoms has being part of dpdr?

[@Dpmanual]

No, it's still the same condition 😊 Watch this and pay attention to #5: kzbin.info/www/bejne/h6qWdXR8eaeMaZI