Did I buy the new house & what about the cottage | Q&A

[@EliseBuch]

ONE THING TO ADD: 🥰 I really appreciate all the worries that comes from a good place, but don't worry I'll not spend any money restoring the house. My boyfriend and I get to be a massive part, and we have a massive say, but we are renters and won't be paying for the restorations ❤ it's a family project and they are trying to help us the best way possible, I am not in any way worried about that bit 🥰

[@katerina9159]

If that’s the case then I think this is the perfect opportunity to live your dream ❤️ I’m so happy for you

[@phaedrazzz]

So they are giving you money to renovate a place, with no professional training in remodeling and structural engineering needed for a building like this???!! Good luck with that and be safe because that is not safe.

[@_Sapph_]

Hope you didn't take offense you just got a massive group of people looking out for you. Happy this renting situation is better than your apartment. 💕

[@phaedrazzz]

@@_Sapph_ oh is this a threat?? Lol.

[@phaedrazzz]

No I don't rent. I own. Stop dreaming.

[@sabrinacomotto3565]

I'm a lawyer and I totally agree with all the comments suggesting to be careful about investing your savings in a property that doesn't belong to you. A written agreement would prevent you for future conflicts.

[@rikkemeek1506]

She is not paying for the renovations

[@EliseBuch]

I won't be paying for any restorations of a house I don't own ❤

[@Sunnbuzz]

@@EliseBuch BUT you ARE renovating it yourself, that type of work. your labour. is called 'sweat equity,' look up that term. Tbc, no one here is being mean its all said with concern

[@poodlegirl55]

@@Sunnbuzz And then when she buys it the sweat equity will give her a higher appraisal and a better mortgage. And if she doesn't buy it she still lived in a cool place and learned stuff.

[@howareyou857]

@@poodlegirl55 and paid plenty of rent while living in a building site

[@consideredwhisper]

Elise, please don’t rely on things like ‘romantic’ and ‘feelings’ about something when you appear to have very little say in who owns this house, despite what you say. We often only hear what we want to hear, and people only say what they want you to hear. Everything needs to be in writing, and if his father is a decent person he will suggest it himself. Test him out: see what reaction there is if you suggest going to a solicitor and drawing up an agreement. I have made decisions based on youthful romanticism and enthusiasm to renovate my ‘home’ and have lost everything further down the line - my boyfriend then benefitted considerably from all my hard work. ALWAYS keep your independent space, which is solely yours always. Please, please take care. You have worked so hard to get where you are. And it’s your Saturn Return (check that out).

[@johnmelissaziech6207]

Getting agreements in writing is a good idea. It protects everyone and prevents misunderstandings.

[@SittinNBitchin]

I promise I'm not trying to be negative but I was in a situation nearly identical to this...PLEASE put something in writing about everyone's expectations...I invested a lot of time and money into a situation like yours...fast forward a couple yrs and we broke up...I lost a lot of money and even more of my time...protect yourself sweet lady

[@_Sapph_]

I agree it can get messy even with a apartment/renting. Fingers crossed she's got her head on her shoulders and already set something in motion for this

[@charoraimondogarcia]

yes! I lived some similar situations and no matter what relationship you have with the person, we are all human and everyone has diferente expectations. Don't go blind into something so important as were you live and were you are going to move your bussines

[@sharenwilde24]

I had a friend who was in a similar situation remodeling a house with her boyfriend. She kept records of her expenses - just in case it didn’t work out. It’s always wise to get a deal in writing. I hope you are doing the same.

[@purplemoonpagan]

yes this is very important. I also once lost all my savings because of a situation like this.

[@jeanniekartis5916]

Agree, always have some type of written contract

[@jeanmikaloff7112]

Hate to sound negative, but do NOT sell the cottage until your name is on the deed of the new house. Keep up with all receipts for materials or work you pay for. Until that house legally belongs to you, you can be booted out without compensation for anything you have invested!! 😬

[@purplemoonpagan]

This is very important! Protect yourself.

[@flybywire5866]

Right you are. Life can go this way faster then you can say "Ohh.."

[@nancyjohnson5483]

You are not protecting yourself, you are protecting your relationship with your boyfriend, his parents and yourself. It is best if it is discussed until everyone knows exactly what is expected. Is he going to sell at this current price, the renovated price, what if the market crashes or booms, is he buying the materials, is there rent involved, are you discounting your work in that rent. Is your boyfriends dad going to have the final say on all renovation decisions. What if there is some difference in opinions about what you and he want. It can be uncomfortable to keep at it until everyone is clear, but it does not get easier tyring to figure it out later. Your boyfirends dad sounds wonderful and I am sure he also has the best intentions.

[@sarahdaw6648]

She HAS to sell it when she moves. The cottage is in a Community Garden and you have to live in the area to lease the garden. Once she moves, she has a year to sell it.

[@jeanmikaloff7112]

@@sarahdaw6648 then she has a year to get her name on the deed to the new house and sell the cottage. There should be a lease with option to purchase in place for the home the boyfriends father bought. Within that lease should be a clause that home can be purchased for XX amount with stipulations in place to address improvements that are made during the time of lease prior to purchase. The lease should also stipulate that money invested by either son or Elise in the renovations of the home will be reimbursed if property is sold to anyone other than them. I have 36 years experience in real estate and you would not believe all the ways this than go wrong!

[@ba3140]

Don't be taken aback by the genuine concern from your viewers. We hear "sell cottage" "close boutique space" "boyfriends dad " "they own it" "if it was up to me" ... we are happy for you also, we just don't want any harm to come your way. Only you know your relationships and the big picture! I wish you the best of luck on this adventure and look forward to the future videos 😀

[@Ladylothlorian]

The fact that boyfriends dad put an offer on the house, he had already viewed without you, and without saying something until after the fact, is a red flag...just be careful Elise

[@howareyou857]

Massive red flag. I am really concerned for Elise

[@jilliand.2184]

Right?! As Elise told the story, I started to get chill bumps. Doesn’t sound right. Especially since she had found a property she loved.

[@katerina9159]

From my understanding the dad was going to buy it anyway and rent it, Elise liking it and deciding to stay there is a different matter

[@howareyou857]

@@katerina9159 yes that is clearer now. However she will still be paying rent and living in a building site. Massive win for bf and parents

[@maliakeliinoi9986]

100% agree with this comment. It really feels that his family is taking advantage of her and she is making decisions literally based on emotion.

[@Kathy-zx5bu]

I also got caught in a similar situation and lost everything. Not only is it financially devastating, it is emotionally devastating. Be very prepared and don't go all in without legal protection. Suggestion, don't sell your cottage until you legally purchase your new home. Good luck and enjoyed the video. 💕💕

[@EliseBuch]

I won't be spending any money restoring the house ❤ I am sorry you lost everything this way, I am being very aware of any risk there might be 🥰

[@susanma4899]

I might have misunderstood, but it sounds like she said that she HAS to sell the cottage because she will no longer be living in the city--I don't know all the details of the cottage arrangement, but it's not like in the US where you buy property and it's just yours, no matter where you go. The allotment gardens are like a co-op created for city dwellers of that particular city, so if you leave that city, you're required to sell your part in that allotment.

[@shellyjoe6657]

Your boyfriends father is a wise man. He is buying a house and flipping it on your blood, sweat ,vision & tears. I understand you can bail at anytime. You don't 'believe' in marriage and your BF doesn't want to even show his face in your social media. At the end of the day this pet project that you are pouring your heart and soul into can be pulled out from under you at any time.

[@janetpendlebury6808]

And the reverse is that she can walk away from it at any time as well, I think it is great that his parents are taking on the financial responsibility of the place, including paying for the reno's, if something major needs doing it will be up to them to foot the bill. As for the boyfriend not wanting to be involved in her social media at this time, there is nothing wrong with that, some people are just not comfortable doing that sort of thing and he has to be respected for that, if he changes his mind at some stage during the coming years that will be his decision. As to marriage that is entirely their personal choice, some people are very happily together without benefit of a bit of paper, some people are perfectly miserable with it.

[@wanya_telborn]

Look stop the negative a lot of partners of you tubers don’t want t be on camera

[@juliaheger8127]

@@wanya_telborn Not being on camera -- perhaps something to hide?

[@missybekind5022]

@ Shelly Joe 1 month later, if you watched this week's vlog, I guess you saw her emotional let down.. (The rug being pulled per se`) Just so horribly sad for her rn, I'm just unclear if the bf is still in the picture & what happened, if there are some bad issues with the house they found during the renovations etc. My heart surely goes out for her!! 🥺💔

[@emeraldforest5551]

Hello, I have seen many people give you advice about getting things in writing and I most definitely hope you do. My other concern for you is once you fix the house it is going to be worth way more money. This being the case you should get something in writing that says what the price will be to purchase the home in the future. No one wants to infer bad motives to anyone But things could change in your relationship or even the agreement can change with you and your boyfriend‘s parents. As previously stated if everything is in writing then you have no worries. But at this point you will be working and investing in a property that you have no claim to other than renting. Wishing you the very best. One other thing because you love your cottage so much I would hate to see you sell it and then things do not work out for you. So I would not sell it until you purchase your new home. Please make wise decisions and don’t be led by emotions. I think of this as also a business decision. If you’re not careful you can lose your cottage your apartment and your boutique and be left emotionally devastated. That is the worst case scenario but it is a possibility. Again I’m so happy for you I hope it all works out and you have a wonderful new home. very best wishes 💚🌻 please don’t be put off by the negativity and everybody’s warnings it’s because we care about you.💙

[@plumblossomed]

I'm a complete stranger, so take all this with a grain of salt, but as someone who has seen sooo many friends financially ruined in their late 20s to mid thirties when relationships end, I would feel bad if I said nothing. Just make sure you get this entire purchase arrangement and promises from his parents drawn up by a lawyer, your lawyer, and have all your 't's crossed and 'i's dotted. Like get it all in writing and signed off on. And if they own the house but you are paying for all the renovations, then you should definitely have an arrangement written up that states that if you don't buy the house, you get to recoup that money from them. You are essentially rental tenants at the moment, and technically the landlords should pay for renovations. The whole arrangement benefits your boyfriend's parents WAY more than anyone else, and more indirectly, him, if the relationship ends. My sister had a similar 'arrangement' with her ex's parents and it turned into a nightmare which financially ruined her. It is also slightly odd to me that your boyfriend didn't really get on board with any of the properties until it was the one his parents were going to purchase, which again, benefits him way more than it benefits you. And as Jean Mikaloff mentioned, I would definitely keep the cottage until your name is on the deed of the new house.

[@artistikitty]

WISDOM! 🙌

[@howareyou857]

Indeed. And the putting in an offer behind her back.

[@rikkemeek1506]

She is not paying for the renovations. If they don't buy the house and chooses to move. His parents can either rent it to someone else or sell it. Not really that bad of a deal i think.

[@dtmc4509]

Sounded like the father will be paying for everything until they actually buy the house. Did I misunderstand?

[@rikkemeek1506]

@@dtmc4509 No you heard that right. Elise don't pay for anything untill they buy the house.

[@pnew2565]

Your energy has changed so much dear Elise - your intuition is telling you this isn't ideal - you're a self-made, smart young businesswoman. Now you're trusting someone else's family with your whole life. Your uncertainty is your intuition telling you to get legal contracts - even marriages have anti-nuptials or community of property legal commitments. This is red flags all around - it can't be a family project because your family is not having a say. Brave up. Love and prayers.

[@howareyou857]

Spot on message. She is paying rent but not money for repairs

[@pattykelly6621]

This will probably be a controversial comment. Obviously I don't know your boyfriend or his family, but it seems like his father is taking a lot of control in this situation. I understand that everything you want is OK...so far. But he has essentially maneuvered you into taking this house. And, as he has a lot of experience, he will be involved in the remodeling. I am particularly sensitive to this type of thing because of personal past experience. I'm glad you have a year to sell your cottage. I hope you will consider not putting it up for sale for at least 6 months. What does your mother say?

[@sstirling8816]

Yes, I agree with what you are saying and really hope that Elise has something in writing. Otherwise she is putting in money, sweat and lots of labor for a home reno that she may get nothing in return. Just saying to protect yourself by having what you have agreed upon in writing.

[@howareyou857]

I am totally shocked tbh. What on earth? If Elise was my daughter I would be having a chat with his father and laying down some ground rules. She has been railroaded.

[@consideredwhisper]

Totally agree.

[@pattykelly6621]

@@caroleobrien2431 Yes. Exactly. Take advantage of our hard won wisdom. We all want you to be successful and happy. Especially happy.

[@katerina9159]

@@caroleobrien2431 wait wait a little bit, she wasn't interesting in that house in the beginning, the dad made an offer bc he wanted to buy it eitherway, don't twist the situation. Elise CAN buy the house if she wants to later on, she said it in the video

[@flybywire5866]

Edit: When i wrote this, i didnt think it would go down that fast. --- I guess the size of the house and garden opens up a lot of options to create the home you want. However, there will be a lot of investment, and everything is just based only on spoken words. Life is never just straight ahead and takes sometimes surprising turns no one expects. I really hope you never have negative experiences. I however had them. I learned how "forgetful" people can be. Suddenly things never have been promised, never been said. A very good friend of decades cant remember a thing.... I dont want to be the naysayer, but if it is only words you have, you have nothing. If in this arrangement, the way you described it, things go south you will come out of it with just the pants on your butt, nothing else. Sorry if this is all quite negative, but this is a very serious commitment you are to undertake. Really do not sell your cottage before your name is also on the house. They way you described the situation puts the risk a 100% onto you and you alone, and you have nothing in your hand.

[@tammyepatterson-anderson4853]

Hi Elise. I suggest getting an agreement so that you have a say in things. Be careful.

[@EliseBuch]

We will ❤

[@BlueBelldancer]

I purchased a condemned home and fully renovated it, alone. You have the perfect situation to be able to design the perfect home that works for you, while getting support from your boyfriends father who knows how to renovate . I learned a lot about how to do things correctly with utilities, as well as how to re-use and recycle vintage and antique doors, trim, light fixtures, etc... I wish someone would have said to me 22 years ago, think of this home as a shell, and create exactly what you want with it. The things I still love that I did was built large closets, storage shelves, and display cabinets. Think about the incredible potential to design your dream home, you have a lovely setting and large space to work for all of your needs. Best of luck from Philadelphia Pennsylvania.

[@EliseBuch]

Love how positive this comment is 🥰❤ It is a new adventure with so many opportunities

[@TheThriftyGma]

Blue Bell Dancer.... your lovely comment is like a breath of fresh air. 💕

[@poodlegirl55]

Finally a good comment!!! I was so excited for Elise and then I read some of these downer comments. My husband and I have remodeled 8 houses and we knew nothing at first, we had no money and we took risks. We are still doing another one now at age 67 and 70.

[@vanessacruz8576]

@BlueBellDancer Finally, a positive and uplifting post.

[@lilbbymoon]

Elise this can become a wonderful future for you both, however please pleaseee legally protect yourself!! You need to be on the Title and own part of this house or have some other legal paperwork done before you go investing all of your money/time & energy into this home. If you were already financially capable and willing to own this first real home I would have purchased it yourself so you are legally entitled to it. It’s nice to put trust in people but not when it comes to big matters such as a home. You just never know what the future holds or how things might turn out so it’s best to protect your best interests. (My first home I bought myself, only I was on the title which protected me when the relationship with the man I was with at the time did not work out. So thankfully I still had my home, and protected the money I had invested into it.) Sending love💜✨

[@howareyou857]

Me too. I invested the most money and insisted on a tenants in common split of assets. Which is just as well because when he left me with 2 tiny kids for another female..I kept the house and all the renovations money, time etc I put into the home. Even paying rent needs to be documented and should not go on while it is being renovated

[@sisterursuline]

Echoing what others have said, it is strange that your boyfriend’s father already viewed the house and especially that he put down an offer without telling you. Maybe they are just incredibly well off financially, but this is not something that normal people do - they don’t just put an offer on a house and see what their child’s partner things. He has wrested from you the power that you had in being sole owner of the property. As everybody has said, I hope you have everything in writing and clear it with a solicitor, also have in writing his offer to sell the house at a certain price.. because why would they pour all this money into renovations and then take a loss on selling it to you for the original price? It’s not cynical to remember that nothing in this world is free, even when people seem to have good intentions. As others have said, don’t sell your cottage until you settle on the house, if you choose to purchase it. I hope you don’t take these comments as haters - people are just concerned and these are huge decisions with lasting consequences. Good luck and I truly do hope I am wrong and that it all works out for you both.

[@penelopesparrow]

I kinda felt that too - it's like 'you're buying this one'. One half of me thinks it's wonderful, a generous thing to do and something my own Dad (the kindest soul on earth) would do, but on the other hand.... why didn't they just give them a loan when they found what they wanted? Why push them to this one? It frightens me to think they're trying to oblige her into marrying their son? Get em in the house, new house new baby, obliged to marry, obliged to buy the house - job done. They haven't lived together before, what if they last 6 months and break up? I wanna be positive about it but also reality 😅 I hope the cottage doesn't get sold, it is a refuge.

[@Chaos_of_beauty]

She will 100% buy it out of gratefulness towards him and his parents. You can feel that she isn't truly happy with the house, because she didn't find something affordable and in good condition. This house is the 'it's ok, but not what I wanted' choice. I hope she listens to everyone's advice on the write everything down, make a contract before buying/renting, even if it's family.

[@sisterursuline]

Agree with both. Their son wasn’t looking to buy property either - Elise was seemingly on her own? It’s a shame that is now going to be dual ownership. Not the same and she can lose everything, and they’ve only been dating for 6 months.

[@mireia9448]

But the cottage is not even liveable and probably its value is close to nothing. Here in Germany you kind of rent the allotment in the community garden and „buy“ from the previous owners the content on the property. I know she calls it a cottage but it’s just a shed.

[@sisterursuline]

@@mireia9448 she paid $20k for it. That’s not nothing even if she can’t live there.

[@juliefaulkner5497]

Just been listening to this retrospectively, am so glad your family came and got you.

[@laurarobbins5155]

I have been watching you from the very first day and have loved every second watching you! Please don't give up everything you have worked so hard for and that you love for a person or thing that may or may not work out. I have learned the hard way. Please protect yourself in all of this and don't rush giving up your shop or your cottage, it has given you such joy! Sending much love and good wishes.

[@lindadodd3829]

Can't even watch till the end... TRIGGERED. live and learn.

[@valtiel9]

I'm so glad that so many other people mentioned to be careful. My heart just dropped when you told the things about your boyfriend's dad, because he seems to love control and that is one of my pet peeves. I hope that he is a very nice man and he wants all the best for you, but please just think about every decision twice, before you make it. I think it's a great opportunity to try out living together with your boyfriend - because as you already know it's not always easy to live with an other person - without making a huge commitment, but also your time and money that goes into renovating won't ever come back if you in the future don't work out as a couple. I wish the best for you! I hope you will be very happy!

[@EliseBuch]

I won't spend any money on renovations ❤ we are renters 🥰

[@valtiel9]

@@EliseBuch that's actually really cool and puts the whole thing in a completely different perspective. 😍I wish you and your boyfriend the best!

[@saarania]

I’m very glad you are happy with this arrangement, but please make sure you cover yourself in writing, as other comments have mentioned. Every family is different and I understand that. I personally would be very uncomfortable with this situation because I’d feel like all my autonomy had been taken from me. But I am fiercely independent, probably to my own detriment where I don’t let people help me 😂 I wish you all the best with this new chapter!!

[@nohitahlittlegirl]

How exciting Elise! I'm very happy for you. I'm not much older than you,also living with my boyfriend in an apartment that is my parents', so I understand the situation. The most important thing is that you feel that what you compromise (Luna, the cottage) is matched or compensated with what your partner is compromising , so if something changes you don't feel that you gave up something really meaningful for the other person. Sorry, that's maybe head over heart thinking, I'm sure you have thought about this things. I wish you the best 🥰🥰

[@Eversew139]

Congrats on this new exciting chapter Elise. Don’t want to be negative but ,remember, your time is valuable as well. I wish you all the best.

[@whathappenedtomyYThandle]

I'll check back in a few months. Emotional decisions always should be seperate from business ones. The "my house" "our house" switching back & forth then neither own anything doesn't bode well for any relationship. And having life expierence frustrating to listen to in 2022. If investing months & yrs into something and have nothing to show for it is OK in the event things go wrong, good luck to you & finding somewhere to go. And that is to you & your bf. Especially if the house doubles in value and you net zero. Then the risk of a building a business at a place you coukd be out of tomorrow or isurance, tax, & other issues. : ) Best on your, his, the parents investment but too much stress for me to watch.

[@TheVelvetLoungeLife]

All intentions are fine until something goes wrong. Hopefully nothing goes wrong but life happens and things do change. You are not married and never plan to be (promises don't count in serious matters) get your agreements, terms and expectations in writing and officially filed. You are investing a lot in something you don't 100% own. Keep your cottage for the time being, keep all of your receipts..etc. You all need to see a real estate lawyer. Our daughter is a lawyer and my husband and I own various properties so I speak from knowledge and care. Get everything in writing ASAP for your protection and your boyfriend's.

[@lyndaplancarte4895]

Speaking from experience and a very important lesson that I was taught in school, "If it's not written, it didn't happen." If expectations and understandings are written and signed by all parties involved, you could be somewhat protected. Just watching your back!! Glad you like to paint and plant as you will stay busy girl !! It'll all work out one way or the other...

[@louiselill1528]

I wish you and your boyfriend every success in building a home together ❤

[@katem3961]

I am so pleased for you Elise. I see this as a natural progression for you in your life journey. You are not a child at 29 (almost), you are a very smart business woman. We only see a tiny glimpse of your life, I have no doubt your eyes are wide open. Your cottage is lovely but there are a lot of restrictions and limitations to it from what you've told us. I wish you nothing but happiness. Only share what you want to share, you're entitled to a private life. Much 💗 and support from Australia 🇦🇺 😊

[@Nwladylaura369]

Such an exciting project! Glad that you and your boyfriend are on the same page. However, do sign a rental agreement with your name on it as well as your boyfriend’s name too! That way if something changes, you will be protected and can’t be told to leave the property on short notice. It is for your protection and for your business as well.

[@susishearer9531]

My heart just dropped when you said you would probably sell the cottage. I have watched you care for and transform the little cottage you seem to love so much. You seemed so overjoyed to buy it and already talking about selling it! I hope you reconsider keeping the cottage. I agree with some of the other comments about what happens if you and your boyfriend don't make it as a couple. Then where will you be? I truly hope this all does work out in a positive way.

[@katerina9159]

I don't think she can keep it (legally) bc she'll move to a different place

[@poodlegirl55]

Your comment makes no sense. Her cottage is a summer home, she cannot live there, it doesn't even have plumbing. And once she moves out of her location she HAS to sell it within a year...it's a community garden. And how can keeping up two gardens be feasible, she will make one where she lives.

[@janetpendlebury6808]

Even if they split up she has not lost out financially, she will have the money from the cottage and the bank loan at her disposal to buy somewhere of her own. She can walk out of the house anytime she wants, she has not invested any money in it.

[@kristareedy8510]

Elise, some of us here are quite a bit older than you and have experienced more in life. We all really want you to be happy and fulfill your dreams, but be very careful. The independent Elise is YOU, owning your own business and having things just as you like them. I hope you will keep your own money and your business, etc in your own name, as a safeguard. With that said, I really do wish the best for you, sweet girl.😁💐🌼🌸

[@EliseBuch]

Thanks ❤ I'm not really a naive person tho, so my money will stay mine 🥰 and renovations will be paid by the owners: my boyfriend's parents ❤

[@kristareedy8510]

@@EliseBuch That’s great! Wishing you all the best!🥰

[@SonetLandman]

How wonderful to have such supportive parents. You are truly blessed.

[@marieshade6291]

Elise, I enjoy watching your channel. That said. I feel a need to say something. I'm a little worried at what you just shared concerning the acquisition of this property. It sounds off to me. I thought to myself; I'm just being paranoid, but then I see that other commenters are expressing the same concerns. Please please be careful. I don't want to see anything bad happen to you. Listen to what others are saying please.

[@jackieb888]

One of the things I find so appealing about you and your videos is your fierce independence and your capable spirit. I am a little sad to hear about the arrangements with the new house. It seems that an older man has come along and hijacked your existing plans for yourself and your life and intentionally taken away your power, holding it over your head almost because he has the financial resources to do so. The fact that he made an offer on the property and withheld that from you until later is a manipulation. It's likely because I am older and I have had experiences throughout my life of this exact dynamic. I'm not trying to bring you down or disparage your BFs father, but it's very sad to see you give your vision and power away on this subject. Your spirit is so strong and admirable, keep it as a priority as long as possible x

[@EliseBuch]

He made it possible for me to buy the house muuch under the sale price if I wanted, walk away from it or let him help us out making it a home until we decide if we wish to purchase it as a couple. Absolutely no manipulation here ❤ I could easily have bought the house myself, but in this situation being able to rent until we know and getting his him to renovate seemed like the perfect solution for us. So no manipulation and I don't feel fear one bit over this.

[@kerris629]

@@EliseBuch as someone who just fought to leave an abusive relationship where I dealt with massive gaslighting & manipulation, everything you've said about the father sounds like manipulation. I realize this comment is coming later, after things have happened & you find yourself out of the situation, but I hope now you can see the manipulation and issues that everyone else has mentioned. Don't let someone take away your personal power.

[@curbsidenation]

Get everything in writing... that's for sure. I know a couple that had the same type of situation with his rich parents. Nothing in writing. They just assumed that they would get a good deal but they paid rent for several years and found out that the rent wasn't coming off the price of the house at all. The price actually went up because they increased the value of the property with all their work and real estate prices had increased in that time frame. They had a lot of hard feelings to say the least.

[@emilyrose9004]

Elise!! It’s crazy watching this video. I’m just in your explanation for the first question. The same exact thing happened to me and my boyfriend. During the pandemic in the US the Real Estate Market has been going crazy. We were renting and every landlord was selling. We had to leave where we were renting. Within one week of finding out that we were being kicked out of our rental house, his dad chose a fixer upper for us. The SAME EXACT SITUATION. I’m so glad to see someone else in the same situation as me!

[@punisher898]

Rich parents bought it as an investment property. It’ll be in their name or his until y’all buy it from them. Make sure to keep your own stuff separate financially just in case the relationship doesn’t work out and you’re suddenly out of a home.

[@howareyou857]

Yes. Exactly

[@lilalay5586]

Yes, to simplify only makes sense! So happy and excited for you, and I’m sure only you can turn large empty house into a beautiful cozy home! I will follow your transition! 💐

[@hunterj458]

Elise, I am so happy for you. I wish you and your boyfriend much happiness in whatever you choose to do. Please keep us updated especially with your renovation plans. I am so excited for you. Best of everything to you.

[@rhondadixon1782]

Thanks for answering all the questions 🙂 I think the house has a lot of potential and I see a lovely garden in your future, can't wait to see your plans and renovations good luck Elise!

[@denisemeredith2436]

Elise, I have had a thought about your new garden, you can take some of the plants and the bulbs from your cottage to the new garden that way you can keep the cottage with you at your new home. Your new home has so much potential to be a fantastic period home as you put the features back in. This is an exciting time. There is one thing about red brick buildings is that they tend to glow when the sun is low in the sky (I used to work in a red brick University and in the autumn the bricks seemed to glow in the sunshine).

[@vicclick8689]

Cute idea

[@_Sapph_]

This housing situation is really unique but I'm glad you feel like you've got a voice in everything. I'm really excited for the potential thrifting videos and seeing the house turn from that cold hospital feel it has to a warm little nook. Sending you all the positive vibes and strength for those renovations.

[@EliseBuch]

Yayy ❤❤

[@veryveronique123]

I can see so much potential in your new house but think it’s a good idea to wait until Spring to sell the cottage (also so that you can still enjoy the cottage for the rest of summer). Can’t wait to see what you will do with the new house’s garden! ❤️ Also can’t wait to see how you will decorate! ❤️ Oh and the window is super gorgeous!

[@bebeautiful6613]

Thank you for the updates. 😊 I’m super excited to watch this all unfold for you. Your “in-laws” 😉 seem like wonderful people. Here is my momma bear coming out… Please make sure your investment in this is protected financially. We don’t like to think of the what if’s… but what if they are killed in a car wreck,for example, your home is part of their estate. Life can turn on a dime. It is not your home in the eyes of the law. Please get yourself an official agreement put in place. I’m in the USA, and in the event of a death or a break up, or the in-laws getting mad at you, you have no rights to anything with out legal documents. I’m 60 years old and have seen many women lose everything because they did not protect themselves. When we are young,and in love, we don’t always follow the advice of our elders. We think we know better than them. I promise, you can love your boyfriend and his family and still protect yourself. ☺️ there’s my momma bear 🐻 speech 😉🥰

[@christinaheesakacowden-wut3809]

Awe, this is such a good solution. What a super great idea of your boyfriends parents! They sound like very nice people. It is a very wise way to deal with this and as you said, they respect your wishes. I think your boyfriend and you will have a great time making this place your own and you will grow with it together. The family project is on the way. Isn`t it lovely to have a compassionate family and one that does not suffocate you, but gives you the freedom to bloom. About your allotment garden: It will be painful to say good buy, because you put so much work and effort in it and love as well. But in the end, there will be other nice people taking it over and you can make your very own fairy tale garden now at your home. I loooove Magnolia trees. They are so magical and beautyful. You know, if you want to, you could even put one of those gypsy caravans in your garden to make a special place to retreat if you need to, or a nice little garden shed/cabin. I can`t wait to see everything growing and unfolding. Huggs from Rose-Cottage, Schurwald Forest, Germany.

[@EliseBuch]

Thank you so much for this wonderful comment ❤

[@TheThriftyGma]

.. Lovely comment. 💖

[@sassymimisandysue3997]

Elise I agree totally with the steps you have taken and it’s lovely to see smiles on your face, you appear “radiant” in this new found happiness! This is a wonderful place for you to be. There is so much potential in the new house and the life you are creating. I wish all the best for you and your BF. I do agree with what so many people have already said. I am 72 years old and have had the rug pulled out from under me in several relationships through the years because I didn’t follow my instincts and the advice of others, to “protect myself” legally. You are happy and in love now, but you never know what the future will bring. There are 2 people in this relationship and 2 families behind them. You can’t “predict” the future, but you can “protect” yourself “Justin Case”. Have you ever met him? No one can predict the future, but just prepare for the bad issues before you get “slapped upside the head” because of your lack of protecting yourself! Everyone here loves you dearly and we are so thankful to you for sharing your life with us. We only want the best for you. Just take the advice you get from all these loyal people who love you and are hopeful for you. Part of your future happiness depends upon your taking the proper steps to see that this new and glorious step you are taking in the new house will be come to the perfect reality for you instead of the nightmare that it could become. That being said, I can’t wait to see what you do in this house. You can make all your gardening dreams come true, you can have a secret garden, maybe even a fairy garden just for yourself. I love the idea the lady from Germany had to put a gypsy style wagon in your yard or to build a beautiful “she shed” in the back yard so you have a perfect. quiet space, just for you to go when you need peace and quiet, just for you, just to think to play, to be happy. Decorate it with all of your creative talent and do whatever your dreams lead you to do. Make it your personal, magical space. I trust your instincts and can see that you are so intelligent. You will always be able to do what is best for you. I love your style and your creativity. I love what you have already achieved in this new space. I love how you don’t act like you are perfect and try to hide your mistakes. Like when you threw the cabinet doors away and then realized you just needed to paint them! I laughed so hard, because we have all done something like that, but we were too embarrassed to admit it! You are a very special person Elise, I only hope you know that. I hope you will realize what the rest of us can already see. I see that you have a loving and supportive family. It appears that your BF also has a loving and supportive family too. I wish the absolute best for you both and I am thankful to you for sharing your life with us. My husband says I always “write a book,” when a paragraph will do. I am hoping that you will take my message as a loving one and you will continue to share your life, your story with us. You are one of the truly most real and honest people I have ever “met” I hope you always realize how special you are. That is why so many of your subscribers love you so much! Hugs- - Sandy❤

[@YellowCase2024]

We all love you. We just don’t want to see ALL of YOUR hard work go down the drain.

[@jackieruffoni5750]

Loving the Q and A Elise. If you are giving up your business to work from home and your garden cottage you will have nowhere to go to get away from work/rebuilding as you do now at your cottage garden sanctuary. Do you have neighbours close by? Have you met them yet? I hope you won’t get lonely while your boyfriend is at work if you are far away from friends, family or neighbours or other houses nearby. I personally would buy the house (with boyfriend) at the ‘very’ low price now. If you are going to move in together, do it legally (signed, sealed and delivered) now. You are WASTING money. Why do that when you could be using the rent money for the MORTGAGE for YOUR house instead. Also be mindful of the amount of money/time/stress this will take on you both. Just get your boyfriends father to do all the main building work in/outside for a small agreed price. This can go on while you are working. Kitchen/bathrooms are the main rooms to renovate first. Then your bedroom. Other rooms can wait. You have loads of time to do it. Get all the legal papers/mortgage done first, now. It’s then YOUR house. One less worry. Then you can have fun. Good luck Elise.

[@sunnyb3933]

Beautiful, open hearted Elise. Trust your heart and intuition. Thats all you can do. And I have learned that it never hurts to ask yourselves the question what happens if things don't work out between us when you move in or invest together. Loads of luck to you. I will be here supporting you as your life unfolds.

[@Karinas_creativelife]

❤️ hold out on selling your cottage for as long as you can and have a clear plan of your next step. Most of us commenting may sound cynical but I think it proves that perfect situation can sadly sometimes go south it’s not to put you off or not try things out it’s definitely concern from a place of love 💕 not everyone thinking you are a “silly little girl” if that makes sense lol … as long as you keep to not spending your money on the Reno then it should all be fine ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@iceeyes4478]

Like a lot of people I want to express concern, but at the same time I don't want to put my own anxieties onto you. You're an adult who can make her own decisions. If this arrangement is what you want to do, then I support you. Nobody knows your life like you do. We're all just bystanders on the outside. So I wish you all of the absolute best and I can't wait to see what wonderful things you do with this house.

[@tinak6484]

So, so happy for you! Just make sure you are financially protected.

[@reneeevans4272]

Hi Elise I’ve been a follower for a couple of years right about the time you took out your dreads. I have admired the way you have taken on building your business, finding your beautiful garden and handling so many highs and lows along the way. As with many of your other viewers we care so much about your happiness. I can see your excitement and am beyond happy for you. There are risks in everything you do in your life choices but so much more reward when you just go for it. I am so looking forward to seeing what you and your boyfriend do together In your new home. I expect it will be amazing!!!

[@EliseBuch]

Thaank you 🥰❤

[@juliadunn8827]

Excellent explanation of how things evolved. Congratulations on”pulling the trigger.” You have good grasp of the practical as well as your talent as a creative. Brava!

[@fionasimagination]

Love how the outfit vibes with the colours in the pictures so well!♡

[@brendahaire8824]

The way I understand is if you move to another city then you have to sell the cottage regardless if you move to that house with your boyfriend or not. You can’t have an allotment garden outside the city you live in. I agree with you in that you will save a lot of money with combining your work space and your studio in your new home and so much more convenient. Good luck in your endeavors. Love to you. Can’t wait.

[@WisconsinLinda]

Elsie, Seems you're making your decisions after much thought. I like that you're not obligated to buy yet until you know for sure that it's where you want to be. The house might not be what you've pictured but clearly it has potential to be really nice and with your talents you will make the house homey and inviting. It will be fun following you on your journey. I do hope we get to meet your boyfriend some time. Linda in Wisconsin, USA

[@blainey73]

I look forward to seeing what you and your boyfriend do with the new house!!! Thank you for answering all of the questions. 😊 Good luck!!!

[@leebennett1289]

Showing my age here but I have to agree with a lot of the comments on here..definitely do not sell winnie until you know you own the new house and have been there for awhile and your relationship is secure and stable. We all love you and want nothing but the best for you ( that's the parent in me coming out) ❤❤❤

[@psmith-kk3ex]

Elise, I think some of the other commenters have good advice regarding this house situation. Make sure you cover yourself legally if you invest money into this house. Because, legally if your friends parents buy the house, you own nothing. It seems as though looking from the outside, your friends parents are looking out for his interest. Just try and make your decision sooner to purchase rather than later before you spend too much money. I wish you all the best.

[@HumanimalChannel]

Id like to know. Did the father buy the house TRULY Behind both elise's back and her boyfriend's, or just elise's?

[@helenpetersen7174]

Yes, when you sell the cottage do it in the spring as that is the most demand market and will give you the most price leverage. Plus all those bulbs will be up and blooming like a siren call of flowers to the person who buys it. lol. I bet that getting rid of the other rent/upkeep obligations will help you to focus on your business too. Happy for you, wish you the best, thank you for your videos. I think you inspire young women, I am older and am glad to see a positive influence out here from a young woman with a vision. It helps others to see they can do things too. Sending positive energy and blessing to all. :D

[@sandyherschberger3620]

I think your plans are awesome and the possibilities are huge for your business! Not sure what that last question was trying to get at either. As I recall you weren't doing much retail of late anyway, as you sell from your website and mail out the purchases. You seem much more relaxed, confident and focused, which is a great thing! You do you! Congratulations! Can't wait for renovation videos to come!

[@labcat647]

Onward with love and hope for a beautiful long future with this man and his family, in this home... but please keep your feet grounded given the situation as it is right now.

[@KiaraBell]

if you wait to buy the house until after it is renovated, it will be worth a lot more, more than you may want to pay. I would buy it before you begin renovations. you can always sell it later. also, it is totally okay to own a house by yourself while your partner lives there. he can pay for part or all of the household bills if you want to split costs. your boyfriend and his family may be kind and understanding but things can change so quickly. please don’t give up your agency.

[@annettemurielle]

It is always lovely to "visit" with you, Elise. I'm so excited for you. Everything is coming together for you.

[@THEMAYQUEEN1]

Please don’t settle or give up what you want. Do not compromise especially if you are paying financially. I feel like you have been railroaded into this house. There seems to be so much pressure. Like it won’t be your house.

[@AjniraBloom]

Thanks for answering my question, Elise. You did explain your thinking and that's what I was wondering about. I think the most important thing you said, is that you don't know what decisions are going to feel like until you've done it, and that is so true, we just have to take the information, our feelings and our intuition, and close our eyes and leap. And leap is what you've done. So we all wish you the best and hope things go according to your best plans.

[@batsanddewdrops]

I’m so excited to see what is to come! I’m so glad you are blessed with supportive people around you and you yourself are so strong! Much love good luck with all the changes!

[@greenbeanroyals]

My partner and I have been together for 10 years and a big part of what has allowed our relationship to last as long as has is that we keep it private, between the two of us. There are people that know me and have known me for years and still to this day are not aware that I even have a boyfriend. Whenever someone asks how he's doing I keep the answer short and simple. I don't give up private information to people. even on social media I don't put my relationship on blast. Not everybody means well for you and relationships that you're involved in. Sometimes it's best to keep things personal. 👍🏾

[@poodlegirl55]

I have to say as a long time viewer with daughters of my own I love everything about this move and plan and think it will work out great. I always hoped you would find a place that could combine living space, work space and garden. Your life was so busy and pulled in so many directions, I think you will have peace here and I think it is good investment financially for you.

[@EliseBuch]

Thaanks ❤

[@dianebaker5243]

Thank you for sharing your update on the house. I hope all your wishes come through for your the house and your business. 👍🥰

[@hilbina]

You are right, it is not the prettiest looking house, but I am sure that there are plenty of ways to beautify it and bring charm to it. Exciting!

[@dejah85]

Just catching up, as I have seen videos posted after this one and was hoping to find that moment everyone was talking about. That house had the WORST vibes... I was cringing as I watched. I'm a sensitive and just knew something was off about the place. I am so happy to see how far you've come today Elise!!! Your life, now, is full of beauty and passion. ❤ I'm glad I finally saw this video because it really speaks volumes of your growth!!! Much love+!

[@keystojournaling9290]

Congratulations again Elise! I was reading the comments and you should know your audience loves you ...this is obvious. I am sure you have all your ducks in a row!

[@emeraldforest5551]

Elise, I wanted to add this comment also since my other comment was so “heavy”. I am so happy for you. And I so look forward to going on this journey with you. This is a very exciting time in your life and you are a very smart and brave young lady. I can’t wait to see what you do decorating. I wish you the absolute best!♥️🌷🌻🌼🌺🌹🪴

[@charliehunt7]

Wishing you both all the best with the house renovations. So excited to see how you guys change things up and decorate it. Congratulations to you both on your new home 🏡 😊

[@lindabernhagen907]

Thank you for taking the time to answer questions. You have been moving in so many different directions and new home will allow you to centralize your business and personal life. Walking away from the cottage will be hard but your new yard has so much potential and hopefully be a permanent space for you to enjoy for years to come. Congratulations! :)

[@marilynmcpheron3231]

Selling the cottage will be hard in one way, but joyful also. I have lived in 13 houses in my married life and each time I was sad to go but eager for the new challenges/projects of the next dwelling. The cottage was a practice for decorating ideas/gardening/flower beds, etc. Take lots of pictures of the cottage and make a little book about it and it will always be a piece of precious nostalgia.

[@patriciagibson2278]

Wow! People are so jaded. Be happy, Elise, be happy. You are a creative, brilliant businesswomen, I have no doubt you are capable of handling your own life.

[@EliseBuch]

Thaanks ❤🥰

[@rainwhite866]

Keep the cottage for a bit in case things so south. Also make sure the opportunity to purchase is in a contract. Things can change unexpectedly, believe me. Keep your independence as much as possible. All the best.

[@julsatmidnight]

I think it's wonderful that you keep your relationship seperate. You can tell that you respect the closeness and aware social media would change that. Your private connection stays genuine and sacred.

[@Olianna10wolf]

Boyfriend is not a family. So that is not a family project. You are sweet, kind and have a good heart, like many girls do, and that often does not end up great. I know something about that.

[@EliseBuch]

I am sweet, but I am also very independent ❤

[@SpiritHeartsSong]

along for this amazing journey with you, Elise! congrats on such an amazing opportunity and life change! so excited to see how it evolves. I love what you said: "you don't know what decisions will feel like until they make them." powerful words!

[@bethanyj9446]

Congratulations Elise and boyfriend! So excited to see you transform your space! It’s gonna be beautiful as is everything that you create. I’ve lived in places with no charm, but it is fun to add it. You’re the perfect person to do it. This space is the perfect clean canvas to make it just the way you want it. Excited to see the transformation! 🥰 Hope you have so much fun and it will be so rewarding. Happy your dream is coming true. 💕

[@frankietune]

This house reminds me so much of an old English country house/cottage.. the bricks, the size and style.. it just needs some TLC.. I can just picture it! The gardens.. to make it have that look! It reminds me of something that could be out of an old period piece movie.. it just needs charm put back into it!! I can see the potential.. I hope you can see what I’m talking about!! Good luck w your new adventure!! So happy for you!!

[@Louisefenner]

I think this is a positive move for you. All the best for this new chapter Elise. 🌺🌻

[@EliseBuch]

Thaanks ❤

[@froufrou7773]

elise, i am so happy to have found your channel again. i found you years back when i came across your dread removing videos and i was totally enamored with how beautiful and creative/interesting you were/are for a good while. now you've popped up on my feed again and i'm so happy to have all these videos to watch.

[@andreabarrette1062]

Hi there from Canada, beautiful lady! So happy for your good news and this new adventure you are starting! There’s nothing like the feeling when you’ve found ‘the one’ you want to settle down with. You may have answered this already, but how did you feel when you found out that your boyfriend’s parents had already put an offer in on the property-did you find this strange? Just curious! Andrea ❤️

[@marieleiva1759]

I think you have made a good decision and this House has a lot of potential and you love gardening so much you could turn this place into a paradise and I could see your future children running in the backyard I wish you all the happiness of the world 🥰🥳

[@lauraoh8048]

This is such a generous thing for your boyfriend’s family to do. Best of luck to you & your boyfriend with the renovations, I look forward to following the transformation

[@elizabethcampbell9033]

You look so happy, you’re absolutely glowing! I’m happy for you!

[@sandyallen1488]

Elise, sometimes when people move into a home that had sadness, they have some kind of ceremony to “cleanse” the house. It’s usually spiritual in nature but can be anything that holds meaning for you and your boyfriend. Do you think you will do something like that?

[@fremont111]

i think everyone is forgetting that this scenario also benefits Elise because she will have tons of new content for this channel which equals more $$$$$ for her...this is also her business, don't forget

[@carla5044]

Elise, I wish you the best in this new chapter of your life. Please protect yourself, so this process can be as enjoyable and as happy as it can. I’m sure you and your boyfriend will build something beautiful for your future. ❤️

[@knaples2593]

Excited for you in this next chapter. You seem to have a strong handle on everything including the realization that there are unknowns and it's all a journey. You are both generous to share the journey with us even if we don't see both of you. Thank you. PS. Love your designs too😉

[@Deogratias562]

So happy for you, been watching you since the beginning, everything is working out ,you deserve a the best in life

[@itsmewende]

Sounds to me like everyone has thought this through. I think it's wonderful that your boyfriends parents are happy to help out in this way. I do agree with those saying keep track of what you spend, but only if it sells, somehow, I do not feel like his family will give you the "boot". I see the sale of the cottage as a down payment on this home, if that's what you two want. Best wishes for an incredibly happy future, married or not.

[@consideredwhisper]

Unfortunately we all ‘feel’ like bad things won’t happen. But yet they do! That’s why we have contracts and lawyers. What on earth are you basing your ‘feelings’ on?

[@itsmewende]

@@consideredwhisper What are you basing yours on, that her relationship will be a failure.? Bad divorce.?

[@Mondoshawn]

@@itsmewende probably based on statistics. And your comments sadly did not age well.

[@christineoates770]

Thank you again for sharing the next exciting chapter of your life. I love watching people be productive and getting ahead. I think you have a wonderful opportunity before you and the wonderful support of family! Pouring your energy into this house will certainly make it a very charming home! Congratulations again❣❤❤🤗