Dissociative Identity Disorder | Lived Experience

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MedCircle

MedCircle

Күн бұрын

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We first sat down with Encina Severa in 2018 to discuss what it’s like to live with dissociative identity disorder (DID). But we didn’t get the full picture. In this series, we flesh out Encina’s full mental illness journey. Welcome to the MedCircle original series, “Encina Severa: Living with DID and Co-Occurring Disorders.”
In this new series, Kyle & Encina talk about the reaction to the original dissociative identity disorder interview, more about what it's like to live with multiple personalities, and what it's like to live with other mental health disorders such as Depression, Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) and Complex PTSD (CPTSD).
Thanks for watching our youtube video! Now,
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#mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #mentalhealth #medcircle #did #dissociativeidentitydisorder #dissociativedisorder #livedexperience

Пікірлер: 211
@MedCircle
@MedCircle 5 жыл бұрын
- *Get our FREE video series on depression here: **bit.ly/3kSEQ6G* -
@maxwill4733
@maxwill4733 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for everything, it means a lot it really matters
@LightintheDark2056
@LightintheDark2056 2 жыл бұрын
👍❤️
@aaliyahraks
@aaliyahraks 2 жыл бұрын
@MedCircle do you have any videos on Dissociative Disorder (not DID/formerly MPD) i would like to understand it to help a young family member
@amyhatfield7181
@amyhatfield7181 2 жыл бұрын
SO BLESSED TO HAVE FOUND THIS CHANNEL ! WELL DONE ! Blessings for you all 🤍🙏🏻
@donnamarymatthew1454
@donnamarymatthew1454 5 жыл бұрын
When she said, “” I want to want to live.. I have struggled for so long... I just want some relief ” I related so hard & made me smile knowing that I am not alone ... I too like her can get through this ❣️
@mahamawan5749
@mahamawan5749 3 жыл бұрын
You are so strong. 💜💜
@darlingm9967
@darlingm9967 3 жыл бұрын
Yes you can. You are strong!
@darlingm9967
@darlingm9967 3 жыл бұрын
❤️
@darlingm9967
@darlingm9967 3 жыл бұрын
Having a Healthy mindset means a healthy life!
@darlingm9967
@darlingm9967 3 жыл бұрын
They will always be open arms whenever you need it. You are strong and will get through this and anything.
@kimayoung81
@kimayoung81 5 жыл бұрын
She sounds like a such a sweet soul. Praying she finds peace and comfort
@Brainstormer976
@Brainstormer976 5 жыл бұрын
ofcourse they are sweet and that is the dangerous part. THere will be a moment that this will change!!They act as if they are very pathetic. actually they are extremely dangerous.
@daniah5427
@daniah5427 4 жыл бұрын
@@Brainstormer976 Mostly no
@arielgarand5604
@arielgarand5604 4 жыл бұрын
MGBrainstormer this is absolutely false. There are many myths about DID but it’s important to demystify all of the false beliefs. Here is a website with cites articles explaining why the myths are not the truth : www.teachtrauma.com/controversial-topics-trauma/myths-media-portrayals-dissociative-identity-disorder/
@alexandradecastro5142
@alexandradecastro5142 3 жыл бұрын
@@Brainstormer976 you are extremely dangerous with such medieval estigmas
@paringlolot4578
@paringlolot4578 3 жыл бұрын
I hope praying can really help her.. she seem nice..
@AliceSylph
@AliceSylph 5 жыл бұрын
Hearing someone else say "I want to want to live" hit me so hard. I've said that in the past and no one could understand what I meant. Hearing someone else say it in the same context brought me to tears, thank you
@rowanb2355
@rowanb2355 5 жыл бұрын
Likewise
@saying...
@saying... 4 жыл бұрын
Me too, I feel like a waste of space often. 😔
@s0lastsummer7
@s0lastsummer7 4 жыл бұрын
Same.... exhausting isn't it 😔
@narthoon6721
@narthoon6721 3 жыл бұрын
hey! its been about a year how are you mentally?
@poison1vy
@poison1vy 3 жыл бұрын
@@saying... But you aren't 🙂
@lilithdaughter8037
@lilithdaughter8037 5 жыл бұрын
Can we all just have a moment to adore her hair color 😩💗💗💗✨
@GamesCooky
@GamesCooky 5 жыл бұрын
It is a very nice color
@giants2011ful
@giants2011ful 4 жыл бұрын
Rabbit Cuddles her hair is amazing
@strange_imagination_
@strange_imagination_ 3 жыл бұрын
And she coordinated her eyebrow and eyemakeup to match!! And her lipstick and shit! Very fashionable! I love the complimentary gold eyeshadow!
@HunnyBunz1138
@HunnyBunz1138 3 жыл бұрын
It’s sad to hear her pain, but it’s a weight lifted off my shoulder to realize I’m not alone in this struggle I face every day with this feeling of “I want to want to live.” This has been a feeling I’ve had even before Coronavirus. This shitty feeling is a hell I wouldn’t even force upon my worst enemies. All I know is we are all in this together. I hope each and every one of you is doing well and hanging in. Just know you’re not alone
@Lemonade748
@Lemonade748 5 жыл бұрын
I was recently diagnosed with but have had since I was a small child - DID, fibromyalgia, POTS, CPTSD, Anxiety, depression, Reynards and nerve damage. I struggle every day and I know exactly the pain she is going through.
@tehcanadian4653
@tehcanadian4653 3 жыл бұрын
I'm sorry. If you ever feel alone or need someone to talk to I will always be here.
@jokesonyou222
@jokesonyou222 3 жыл бұрын
i’m so sorry sending love and healing to you ❤️
@dalenedebruyn6404
@dalenedebruyn6404 2 жыл бұрын
That’s such a heavy load ..Wish we could have a cup of coffee together ! You are a brave soul and I pray you get rewarded for it 💪❤️
@giants2011ful
@giants2011ful 4 жыл бұрын
When she started crying I just wanted to reach through the screen and give her a hug and be there for her. Her pain touched my soul. She is beautiful physically and mentally. She is sweet and kind and smart. She is strong!!
@dl9118
@dl9118 3 жыл бұрын
The only way we can heal is by helping others. Unfortunately there are so many people who just don't understand.
@emilybets418
@emilybets418 5 жыл бұрын
When I lost my dog, I had such a severe emotional pain and I isolated myself from people even from parents, because nobody understood me how much pain I had. P.S. I wish her fast recovery in her journey. ❤
@paesitopaez4302
@paesitopaez4302 5 жыл бұрын
So sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is awful, specially if you are already deeply depressed and disturbed and the pet is your only support
@emilybets418
@emilybets418 5 жыл бұрын
@@paesitopaez4302 Thank you ❤
@kerri5825
@kerri5825 5 жыл бұрын
Same! My 19 year old dog died 2 years ago. They say it gets better with time, but I feel worse about it now than I did before
@ashleystubbings5631
@ashleystubbings5631 5 жыл бұрын
Anyone who says "It's just a dog!" obviously hasn't owned one. I can COMPLETELY relate to you. I have, over the past 6 years, lost two dogs, who were quite literally my best friends.
@s0lastsummer7
@s0lastsummer7 4 жыл бұрын
My emotional support doggo just entered the "geriatric" stage and even though she still acts like a pup, I can't help being filled with dread at least once a day knowing one day she'll leave me alone and I won't know what to do. She's literally everything to me, and I'm not that type of person who uses the word "literally" more than I use toilet paper 😂 I REALLY MEAN she's freaking EVERYTHING that matters to me.... she's the only being on this earth who has never let me down and she keeps me from having full blown ptsd freakouts in front of people. I am going to want to follow her into the light and it'll be so hard to fight that feeling.... but I hope you're fighting it! I know how awful it is... I've lost others, although they weren't QUITE as bonded mutually as my current pup and I are.... but it was still like a bomb dropping on my entire existence and I was expected to piece everything back together in like two or three days because after that long people expect you to be functional again. 😳 obviously they aren't dog people! I'm so sorry for your loss. Hang in there.
@user-ux5cx1lx9g
@user-ux5cx1lx9g 3 жыл бұрын
I totally agree with her I don't need someone who's sympathy to me but I want someone just be there to me rather than asks me questions like "why? Are you okay? It will be fine. You can do it. It's okay" It's just feels like they're just curious about what happened to me but not even care about me or trying to help me a bit.
@Contessa998
@Contessa998 5 жыл бұрын
Girl I’ll be your best friend. Ur So sweet and I can relate so much. Ditto on the family thing
@isabellac5669
@isabellac5669 5 жыл бұрын
Me too! I know what it's like to feel as she does! We need a lot more compassion!
@feefeekool675
@feefeekool675 3 жыл бұрын
I relate to exactly what you are saying... people you need to hear and listen to you. Yes 🥰🥰🥰 you are asking for a real friend..
@VegasCyclingFreak
@VegasCyclingFreak 5 жыл бұрын
That could be me speaking, except that I don't talk to people because there isn't anyone to talk to.
@blurryphan7578
@blurryphan7578 5 жыл бұрын
I know that feeling. The internet is a friendly place. If you know anyone there talk to them. If not (I know that too) look up therapists that seem like you. You WILL find someone, and you'll find a good fit. You just have to look for them. :)
@dantedash
@dantedash 5 жыл бұрын
Don't give up.
@paringlolot4578
@paringlolot4578 3 жыл бұрын
😂😂
@lelysworld
@lelysworld 5 жыл бұрын
I can’t believe how perfectly she sums it up. I listen to her, and I’m nodding the whole time. It’s sooo hard to find good therapy. I wish she gets the help she needs. I’ve been there, praying to God that I feel better soon and feel happy. I recently heard that happiness is not constant, it’s just a feeling like being excited or scared. So it’s ok to not feel good all the time. I wish I could talk to her for hours, but this is just one post. If you ever read this, I’m here for you girl! I really am. Xoxo
@JMigUK
@JMigUK 5 жыл бұрын
Encina, you deserve to find peace, you're not alone
@5dstarseed441
@5dstarseed441 5 жыл бұрын
I want to give Encina a great big hug!! She's so brave fro sharing her story and so strong for pushing through the pain
@daniellem1978
@daniellem1978 5 жыл бұрын
I felt her pain when she cried and spoke so candidly about her depression. I hope the absolute best for her xx
@LeilaLandOfficial
@LeilaLandOfficial 3 жыл бұрын
Despite never exchanging words with her in person, I have so much love for Encina. This is heartbreaking. You're in my thoughts girl, stay strong ✊
@destinyrutland7418
@destinyrutland7418 3 жыл бұрын
That video out of the ones you guys have done reached out the most to me. We watched a small clip in my college psych class, and i went home to watch them all. We all have our own mental issues. It is a blessing people are talking about these important subjects our society has put off, and discriminated against for so long. I just wanted to say thank you! Encina you are a brave amazing soul. I felt every word you have said
@kathdngl
@kathdngl 5 жыл бұрын
Encina if you're reading this, I just want you to know I admire you for being such a strong woman. Sending hugs from PH ❤
@claudiaargueta3767
@claudiaargueta3767 3 жыл бұрын
I immediately relate to her 2 minutes in. Love 💘 you Encina. I totally get those scary thoughts
@naomithomas1423
@naomithomas1423 4 жыл бұрын
She spoke straight from my head.
@marydelong2367
@marydelong2367 3 жыл бұрын
I have always thought that the abusers damage there victims for life. They move on,and a lot of times they never think twice about the horror they inflicted on us. But we must live with the damage for life. We have been so trerably damaged and shattered. I want to thank everyone who is brave enough to share there stories. It helps more than they know. It helps us to continue to fight and to live. I want to say GOD BLESS EACH AND EVERY ONE OF US WHO IS STRUGGELING. STAY SAFE , AND KNOW THAT YOU ARE DEEPLY LOVED.
@laurenenriquez1187
@laurenenriquez1187 3 жыл бұрын
I don’t suffer from disassociation identity disorder but when she said “I don’t want to feel like a burden” I related so much! I suffer from a eating disorder and it’s extremely hard for me to really open up about how I struggle with it everyday because I don’t want people to feel like i’m putting my problems onto them.
@Jannatulfirdoas
@Jannatulfirdoas 5 жыл бұрын
May God bless you and heal your sad heart i wish i could give u a hug n be there for u my dear sis,
@sweetascandyxoxo
@sweetascandyxoxo 2 жыл бұрын
I love her hair and eyebrows. Her whole look head to toe too. She seems really sweet. Grateful for this perspective. I hope she finds help to feel better but proud of her
@feefeekool675
@feefeekool675 3 жыл бұрын
I know exactly how you feel...I have it as well and people really don't understand how it sends us to a loop. To be discombobulated and wanting to do normal things.
@williamweimian
@williamweimian Жыл бұрын
Wow this really breaks my heart
@md2071
@md2071 2 жыл бұрын
I never knew how to explain it I couldn’t have said it better than she did. I want to want to live! Anytime I tell myself I want to live I can’t even believe it and I know I’m lying to myself then I just find myself in tears. Like damn you can’t even conjure up some shit to even want to live. But unfortunately at the moment I wouldnt even know where to dig to find that feeling. I completely understand her therapy dilemma, I hate having to reopen and re explain these traumatic experiences that literally take days to get myself back together mentally after even talking about the shit. I hope she’s doing better ❤️
@justinestephonie4606
@justinestephonie4606 5 жыл бұрын
We love you Encinia!
@LAJACOBS1
@LAJACOBS1 2 жыл бұрын
You are so beautiful inside and out. You have such a unique way of expressing that’s makes anybody totally understand you. I work at a school with Sped Ed students. One of my student has DID so I was very interested in learning to have a better understanding of him. I pray God guides you and comforts you. God bless you sweetheart.
@caitlinnnnnnnnnnnnnn
@caitlinnnnnnnnnnnnnn 3 жыл бұрын
Hearing her talk about friends and professional support is so hard to hear as an autistic person without many friends. My story is different, but I really struggle at the level that she does. Im high functioning (YAVI effect) and my country is in a mental health crisis so I don't have access to professional support either. What results is really an overdependence on my family. We are all trauma bonded and I want to be independent, but my family are literally my only support. I'm trying to access professional support, been fighting for it all my life. But the system passes you onto new people with 6 session caps. No one seems to realise how exhausting it is. I loved hearing her need for consistency. I share that with her.
@JimmiAlli
@JimmiAlli 3 жыл бұрын
Encina is amazing.
@jacqueline8559
@jacqueline8559 2 жыл бұрын
She has great insight into her illness and treatment needs. As a psychotherapist, and person with years of depression, that will ultimately save her
@ashleyheliker764
@ashleyheliker764 5 жыл бұрын
It was like she took the feelings outta my head! 💜 love to you Encina! #iwanttowanttolive #endingthestigma #320ChangesDirection
@ericaswainson1405
@ericaswainson1405 2 жыл бұрын
I Really relate to this ladies experience of depression and what needs to support her . There's less help where I live.
@ashleystubbings5631
@ashleystubbings5631 5 жыл бұрын
I watched precisely 48 seconds of this video I could relate straight away! I want to give Encina a big hug! Changing the subject slightly, I've noticed over the 20 years or so that I have suffered from depression that I've heard many people refer to it as 'my depression'. I'm not saying it's wrong, but the first thing my therapist taught me was to refer to it as 'the' depression. That way, you don't own it and can disassociate yourself from it. It is something that you can control, and choose not to have in your life.
@catalinasanchez4986
@catalinasanchez4986 5 жыл бұрын
You cannot chose to not have depression? It is a chemical imbalances. You cannot just say ''I don't have depression anymore.'' And it go away.
@ashleystubbings5631
@ashleystubbings5631 5 жыл бұрын
@@catalinasanchez4986 No, I realise that. But the point I was trying to make is that if you 'own' the depression you are far more likely to make it part of who you are, rather than a completely separate entity. But I realise it isn't as simple as that. You cannot simply decide not to have it anymore, but it can help to disassociate yourself from the way it makes you behave sometimes. Does that make more sense?
@marydelong2367
@marydelong2367 3 жыл бұрын
Exactly. Don’t own it. It’s like when someone has cancer. Never say, my cancer etc.
@LemuriAHDF1111
@LemuriAHDF1111 4 жыл бұрын
This is so me right now , first time learning about Did
@nillyhany5807
@nillyhany5807 5 жыл бұрын
Encina is so charming!
@isabellac5669
@isabellac5669 5 жыл бұрын
I found such similarities! It's a bit anxiety producing, as I realize how alone I feel! It's a lifetime of hell! Many therapists, meds, etc; major horror stories to boot! Trust is a huge issue for me! I absolutely empathize with her! ✌🏻💜✨👐🏻
@briannab4770
@briannab4770 5 жыл бұрын
What a beautiful soul. I want her to find some relief too. There's a woman named Mikhaila Peterson who talks about the startling link between diet and depression. She suffered from terrible depression chronically and she started eliminating foods from her diet. She's now on a very restrictive diet, but all her autoimmune symptoms and depression have lifted entirely. I know it may be frustrating to be bombarded with a myriad of "Just go for a run and stay positive!" or "Have you tried blah blah essential oils?", but I think at this point, it's worth looking into anything, and trying things can't hurt. Sending my love to you.
@creative2716
@creative2716 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you. I needed to get that information too. So many little nuggets of info from these MedCircle videos.
@crystalschranz3403
@crystalschranz3403 5 жыл бұрын
Has Encina worked with an EMDR therapist with a speciality in DID? An EMDR & DID episode would be fantastic.
@tidbitsofmylife2367
@tidbitsofmylife2367 5 жыл бұрын
I’m so happy you can reach out. I have a tendency to totally shut down. I totally isolate myself I don’t answer the phone I don’t call people it stinks.Reason being is that if I’ve been asked once when I’m depressed and told someone they always ask WHY?
@creative2716
@creative2716 3 жыл бұрын
#MeToo (in more than one way)
@selinaogorman8380
@selinaogorman8380 7 ай бұрын
I love this girl so much and everything she going through how can you not respect someone that deeply like Encina she endured so much and managing her mental health including did I respect and love her more and more I would love to give her a hug and meet her in somethings regarding my mental health I can relate love her courageous bravery stay always true to yourself Encina not many do that proud of you.
@briannamaldonado5618
@briannamaldonado5618 5 жыл бұрын
Related to her when she said that she wanted some relief . Having difficulties with my relationship with my mom and my real dad again and I don’t really know what to do. I’ve done counseling but I felt more of a burden to them and I felt like no one really understands that pain I’m going through. Felt more like I’m just ungrateful but honestly I really am but I just want more of an emotional connection with them. 🤷🏻‍♀️
@leosun-9833
@leosun-9833 5 жыл бұрын
Please MedCircle, connect Encina with therapist Ramani Durvasula. I believe Doctor Ramani has the insight to work with/and understand her more. It would be a very helpfull and learning/evolving combination. Love from the Netherlands
@fienevandijk7224
@fienevandijk7224 4 жыл бұрын
Ja, Nederland! Jij bent de eerste persoon waarvan ik weet dat ie Nederlands en bewust van DID is. Fijn om te weten dat ik niet de enige ben.
@jessicalilley3684
@jessicalilley3684 3 жыл бұрын
Anyone dealing with the same problems know your a beautiful human, the world loves you and is lost without your life on it.
@kozdog1
@kozdog1 5 жыл бұрын
Stay Strong!!!!!!!!!!!
@margaretdooley2742
@margaretdooley2742 3 жыл бұрын
Hop she gets better life is hard but harder when your sick x
@aprilc138
@aprilc138 5 жыл бұрын
I love in Arizona. My door is always open!!! Ibhave felt with depression and anxiety since I was 17. My 14 year old daughter suffers from it as well. You have a family here in Tucson if you ever need it!!!!!!!!!
@creative2716
@creative2716 3 жыл бұрын
That is so kind.
@nesli9564
@nesli9564 3 жыл бұрын
wow ive never felt so related to someone i try so hard to reah out and i always find sympathetic rather than empathetic
@alison5204
@alison5204 5 жыл бұрын
i love this !
@lavendarmin6500
@lavendarmin6500 5 жыл бұрын
Could you maybe do a series on C-PTSD with a professional sometime? Listening to Encina talk about a diagnosis that I have recently been told I might have was really insightful, but I would also like to hear an expert perspective on the topic. I know you have some stuff on the website about PTSD in general, but it seems to me like PTSD and C-PTSD, while they share some similarities, are very different conditions in many ways. Would also like to hear a professional's take on it not being officially recognized in the DSM-V and what issues, if any, patients struggling with C-PTSD could encounter getting treatment as a result.
@PenandBlade
@PenandBlade 5 жыл бұрын
Hey guuuurl... listen, I just want to mention that I suffered from chronic depression all my life (at least as far back as I can remember) until I was 28 and ... long story short, my wife at the time called the police on me (unfairly) and I ended up getting arrested, but weirdly that ended up inadvertently curing my depression. I now believe that depression stems from the feeling being trapped (not free), usually in your own mind, body, life etc. Anyways, I just share it cause I had no hope really of ever not feeling depressed on a daily basis (just hoped to be able to cope better and better) but then one day it happened, thank God! And it's like weird to think that what is normal for me the past couple years has been normal for everyone else their whole life... and what was normal when I was depressed, still is normal for many people out there... anyways it's a trip--much love and hugs and all that--my heart really goes out to you. 💚
@Contessa998
@Contessa998 5 жыл бұрын
Pen & Blade I don’t understand the Colo correlation of you being arrested and your depression being cured. Can you please elaborate on that?
@bz2017
@bz2017 5 жыл бұрын
Im so interessted in your story. Can you please how exactly yoir depression disappeared? Did you got to think about life alot in prison or what was it that got you out of that depressed state?
@kaliigiirl2262
@kaliigiirl2262 5 жыл бұрын
I can't but I can believe iam tearing up as I see this because iam there now as I write this i just dont get how many people will just call this being lazy if we don't do anything and we are in bed all day or stay in the home 24/7 ...and it hurts when it comes from your own family not to understand even if one or two of um say they do they don't because everyone is different in all ways 😟 ive had this all my life since I can remember never took medicine could handle what I could on my own but now that iam older I just can't do it anymore so now iam on meds. I see a therapist every week and so far iam ok im hoping it gets better and soon somehow I can be me again 😕😞 even if its 5%-10% percent of me back some of the pain could just be gone and anxiety too omg I feel for all and whoever is going through any hard time(s) i feel for you and hope one day too you are relieved of your pain(s) depression is no joke depression is a DISEASE just remember that the next time someone wants to tell you different or treat you some kind of way ...STAY STRONG EVERYONE KEEP DOING YOU😊
@takinurbacon
@takinurbacon 2 жыл бұрын
I want more! Has she tried hypnosis?
@333Eriana
@333Eriana 2 жыл бұрын
i can relate to what she is saying - i have no one to talk to or to reach out to - that's why i'm sitting here at midnight
@connie_d
@connie_d 5 жыл бұрын
OMG LOOK AT THE DOG 😍😍😍
@floracuni9102
@floracuni9102 4 жыл бұрын
I know I'm in love with that dog 🥰😍
@paganwolf5951
@paganwolf5951 3 жыл бұрын
Woof.
@cosmiccow
@cosmiccow 3 жыл бұрын
I relate so much to this it’s unbelievable 💕🤜🏻🤛🏻
@kayteejohnson1202
@kayteejohnson1202 5 жыл бұрын
I'm that person that Kyle was talking about, I really want to start therapy sessions but I don't know how to search for a therapist or how to pay for that?
@cincyga
@cincyga 3 жыл бұрын
Sounds like me all the way except i have the need to isolate and try to reset for a week or so. It gets hard pushing through so many different opinions on what to do so i say f-it and push everyone away
@Meech-ym1qj
@Meech-ym1qj 2 жыл бұрын
I had one and only one breakthrough with a part of my childhood trauma.. next session my therapist had resigned
@catherinepraus8635
@catherinepraus8635 4 жыл бұрын
Perfect statement i want to want to live omg thats me
@crazyeyedme4685
@crazyeyedme4685 2 жыл бұрын
I isolate but also push to get out.. But I think issues mental health issues like depression and did can be complicated and complex as so much as one individual is to another. I think someone like me I need to learn myself need to trust myself leave myself first that way when I do retail for help and someone you know can only do so much and then they and then they you know show their true colors of how they feel or that they can't they just can't handle it I'm all right with it tonight I can rely on myself again. A lot ppl don't even have a choice of having friends who understand or or friends who can at least you know help you or do anything other than be your friend so that's what it's about just just like anything it doesn't matter if you have dear dear d i d or not you you need to figure out which friends are good and which aren't and you need to trust yourself and forgive yourself and work with yourself communicate study take notes except your failures and acknowledge and just keep going on
@monicajosiahsilveira5715
@monicajosiahsilveira5715 2 жыл бұрын
Tears still dropping, can't hardly type this im so debilitated with such great pain. So overwhelmed with realizing even my closest family always forgets that there is something different about me. Everyday is a fog for me. Self medicated for so long I can't see my way out of complete feeling of doom.. my purse is messy, my closet, my cupboards, car, everything in my life is unorganized including my decisions, relationships always ended abusive, have put my self in situations in my adult years to continue victimization, ive been punished to prison sentences , mentally and physically tormented at 46 im just realizing it was from years of rape as a little girl, my private parts are ruined, and I'm daily angry, take 2 types of blood pressure medication. After many years of running from everything including authority my mom convices me to see a Dr. Only to have that dr. Extend his hugs to longer and longer embraces. Which I kept a secret bc thats what the perpetrators trained me to be when a young child.. I don't know how to feel anything but terror and pain. I have lately embraced the realization that this is my print this is my life and God hates me .
@audreannedupuis546
@audreannedupuis546 Жыл бұрын
EMDR Therapy would help heal and move on from trauma and fears which would then help with depression ❤
@LuzLopez-fl1qp
@LuzLopez-fl1qp 2 жыл бұрын
I have a sister who has DID but I feel Che is not doing enough for her healing..she has been in and unhealthy relationships for years. She has alters that have attacked me in front of my son when he was younger..we did not speak for years because of the trauma I sustained and our childhood was very unhealthy and dysfunctional. I need a consistant therapist too..her office is inconsistent in returning my calls.
@albertoramosalbertoramos7163
@albertoramosalbertoramos7163 3 жыл бұрын
Me too I have depression because of pandemic
@progressnotperfection1839
@progressnotperfection1839 2 жыл бұрын
How is Encina doing today? I pray she is doing ok.
@crazyeyedme4685
@crazyeyedme4685 2 жыл бұрын
Won't you go to her page and ask her she's got a KZbin page she interacts with two. Last time I was there she was being kind of a b word but and then I pointed out how it was kind of weird how she had like a photo of her in her skimpy lingerie for her head picture for her channel picture and then in all our videos she was like selling stuff and doing commercials. She wouldn't answer other people but she wouldn't talk to me when I tried to talk to her
@ashleywolfe9460
@ashleywolfe9460 4 жыл бұрын
I heard she needs consistency...profoudly important in time of need
@geromlasmar4221
@geromlasmar4221 2 жыл бұрын
I like her
@STEVOLOVESTHAILAND
@STEVOLOVESTHAILAND 3 жыл бұрын
When im like this I reach out i get no response and no help. Them the burden feelings start in.
@Dayna75
@Dayna75 5 жыл бұрын
I wish we didn't have to pay to watch the whole thing :(
@catalinasanchez4986
@catalinasanchez4986 5 жыл бұрын
Seriously. I wish someone would upload it free lol.
@jpmcfluffies9451
@jpmcfluffies9451 2 жыл бұрын
That would be the day I could call someone at 1am or 2am and they would gladly want to be with me at that hour, ha! Hate to say it but when it gets to that point and you're constantly reaching out to people (friends/fam), it is burdensome to people. They don't want to be your therapist! It is a major stressor for these people and I wouldn't want to put that kind of extra pressure on outsiders (non-health care providers). I say this as someone with MDD.
@crazyeyedme4685
@crazyeyedme4685 2 жыл бұрын
Right. There's a line at some point unless you're literally about to commit suicide then you know but even then person thinks that they're about to commit suicide and they keep doing it every single freaking night and threatening it needing to talk someone the person's eventually going to like start the cause people that they're venting to to have problems...
@humano.n.1824
@humano.n.1824 3 жыл бұрын
I want to want to live 😢 sadly I feel the same way 😥 and it's feeling very hopeless many times 😓 still looking through pieces for harmony 🧠👩🏻‍⚕️🧔🏻🧔🏼👩🏻‍🦳🧑🏻💃🏽💃🏻🧘🏾‍♂️👬👥🗣️🙃
@BrandiNaCole
@BrandiNaCole 3 жыл бұрын
How can i get in touch with Encina? I want to help her.
@redstones6645
@redstones6645 2 жыл бұрын
Here is her youtube channel kzbin.info/www/bejne/o2K1dJaqmrGsZ80
@anitrarice7259
@anitrarice7259 2 жыл бұрын
"I want to want to live." Deep empathetic sigh.
@CutieRingoJoy
@CutieRingoJoy 2 жыл бұрын
I was reading a comic about a male alter who is in their 30s and confused why they woke up in a 16 year old girl's body, they even remember their past as male and where they live but when they went to search for friend there it was stranger living there. The guy was called Thursday, all the alter take a day of the week and he was Thursday and will wake up a week has passed. I'm wondering do you wake up and not remember what the alters did and wake up a total different day and week and just lose a lot of time because time has past before you. When it was such a sort moment to you.
@aderodriguez3481
@aderodriguez3481 5 жыл бұрын
Life is very unfortunate unfair, to the fact that human beings can be very selfish, to themselves,. When you need them the most even for little things they are not there. But when they need someone or something the want you to be there. I know this from my own perspective and experience, and I have experience selfishness and that they act only when something is convenient for them. Honestly I'm fed up with some People that act that way. 😈👽👹
@melissaharris3890
@melissaharris3890 4 жыл бұрын
serious question. what would happen if each personality drew a self portrait? would they all draw different people? or more or less the sameone?
@georgerobins4110
@georgerobins4110 4 жыл бұрын
Melissa Harris They’d all draw different people, yes
@creative2716
@creative2716 3 жыл бұрын
Oh my goodness, what a great question. That would be a fun exercise for her do, to help her learn more about the identities she has never met. But it should be a personal thing for only her. Encina, you do deserve some privacy.
@crazyeyedme4685
@crazyeyedme4685 2 жыл бұрын
I see that med circle took my advice and removed encino's first like mini video for them. That was smart and I'm glad you guys did. She can still do her mini videos on her own page and you know do whatever she wants I guess really but that many video you know everyone else's silly mini videos are not getting to help anyone okay. Why because you can see how the whole idea of really really acting it out and his has taken hold and spread through the community of self-satisfied did people. And so when you have someone who is super screwed up going through all the symptoms of you know having did confused trying to understand what it is and then they find a video of Encina acting like 'mini', I say acting because I mean she is absolutely over acting, they're probably going to do what I did the first time dick oh well everything makes sense but I'm not like that I mean you must have to be really really screwed up to have actual did and act like that. And then so I quit I said no I was just I was just trying to find an excuse for me God doing all the behaviors that I do which includes having a little but not acting like a freaking idiot and it's just my fault and I shouldn't seek any help. Usually you know you have to think too like dude still have did they see that kind of something they're going to be turned off forever you're going to continue to deteriorate mental health not get help and eventually kill themselves. I'm sorry I didn't see that there's just you may have did and a little but the way you post the stuff online and you really exaggerate it is it really bothered me. It doesn't bother me anymore because you can do what you want but hey when I talk to people who think that acting like that is is like sincere and real how the ID works I put them in their place unfortunately I've noticed that like a lot of the communities are not have have grown out of the whole talking about their minis and posting stupid videos like that so that's a good sign for the overall narrative and understanding of did.
@Jerina369
@Jerina369 5 жыл бұрын
wast sadness
@kathrynbresser3991
@kathrynbresser3991 3 жыл бұрын
This is me. I have no support.
@fernandoramirez7510
@fernandoramirez7510 4 жыл бұрын
For the 16 ppl that disliked the video shame on u
@Pinkfairywife
@Pinkfairywife 3 жыл бұрын
I’m still trying to figure out if this guy is a persona or just makes me uncomfy
@elscorten
@elscorten 5 жыл бұрын
@elbareyes2838
@elbareyes2838 2 жыл бұрын
I love your hair. Encina, you deserve a relief. If you want try talking to a Christian professional. You may ask for prayer in a church if you wish. Don't underestimate the power of God, of prayer to heal you. I'll keep you in my prayers🙏🙏🙏
@hannahwoodcock1191
@hannahwoodcock1191 5 жыл бұрын
Will this one be for paid subscribers only?
@Convoluted-and-Exiled
@Convoluted-and-Exiled 5 жыл бұрын
What? I hope not... Really interested in hearing this and don't have a Subscription.
@hannahwoodcock1191
@hannahwoodcock1191 5 жыл бұрын
@@Convoluted-and-Exiled All of their videos used to be available free to people who signed up for their website, but now they typically only post the introduction to each series for free, and you have to pay to see the actual substantive videos. :/ Not sure if that will be the case with this series, though. Guess we'll find out in 8 minutes.
@frankietower6753
@frankietower6753 5 жыл бұрын
I believe it’s only on Facebook that you have to pay, otherwise it’s free to watch here on KZbin. The only thing I’ve noticed is that it’s shown in clips, or multiple videos rather than just one ‘straight through’ video as it would with a paid subscription. I could be wrong though!
@jojozepofthejungle2655
@jojozepofthejungle2655 3 жыл бұрын
Such a beautiful woman.
@Luna-ft8yh
@Luna-ft8yh 4 жыл бұрын
It's weird for me that she's looking for help. If I'm depressed I reach out to no one and I'm avoiding them and I trust no one and I don't listen to therapists telling me I need people
@reneelemay6417
@reneelemay6417 5 жыл бұрын
Lmao have to pay for this
@MrOldboy360
@MrOldboy360 5 жыл бұрын
I would expect one of her "alters" to take over the pain of the depression...But instead she has to deal directly with the "feeling of abandonment" so doesn't that negate the whole purpose of having D.I.D? I think she's a borderline, for sure...I just really hope they're not giving her any Xanax to sleep.
@EncinaSevera
@EncinaSevera 5 жыл бұрын
I'm not borderline
@MrOldboy360
@MrOldboy360 5 жыл бұрын
Hi,@@EncinaSevera... 1st of all I want you to know that I wish nothing but the very best for you & I'm positive that your pain is genuine. But on the other hand I also feel that you might be exaggerating your symptoms of "D.I.D" & it's not helping anyone.
@EncinaSevera
@EncinaSevera 5 жыл бұрын
That’s your personal opinion as you have no idea what I’m going through or how I have worked on healing.
@MrOldboy360
@MrOldboy360 5 жыл бұрын
Well obviously, I can only speak from my "personal opinion" because it's the only one I have (no pun intended) & I do have an idea what you are going through because you have put out plenty of videos talking about it. Now how you have "worked on healing" is where I'm skeptical because a 1000 year old fairy, really?
@lavendarmin6500
@lavendarmin6500 5 жыл бұрын
I'm curious what evidence you have that she has BPD because I haven't seen any throughout the entire series. People with BPD engage in a particular pattern of behavior related to their fear of abandonment. Lots of people experience abandonment feelings and traumatic histories without exhibiting borderline-pattern behaviors.
@justinholmes9770
@justinholmes9770 4 жыл бұрын
Kyle would make a superstar therapist. I would only suggest temporarily feeding the illusion to diagnose. Playing their game is harmful. Narssacist in a sense, can't be helped. She will escalate these alement until she acts on them for post-life sympathy. This is rare but can happen. Usually, this can be outgrown, but she seems to be over 20. I am curious about her desirer to reconcile with her parents. She had mentioned abuse. Most of what I have encountered form survivers like her is a feeling of mutual responsibility and complicity in the act. It's not exactly apparent, but maybe exploring gender or sexual identities issues may be the first and most productive step. I emphasize may. I mean no insult.
@crazyeyedme4685
@crazyeyedme4685 2 жыл бұрын
Psychos are attracted to empaths and vise versa.
@rowanb2355
@rowanb2355 5 жыл бұрын
@themountainsoul872
@themountainsoul872 3 жыл бұрын
when she do the makeup, can she switch her personality???? dont believe her.
@ann4259
@ann4259 5 жыл бұрын
At 2:30min , good point ... she is an attention seeker !!!
@fienevandijk7224
@fienevandijk7224 4 жыл бұрын
Do you think she's attention seeker or faking?
@delly5965
@delly5965 4 жыл бұрын
There is a point where severe depression turns to suicidal ideation/attempt. That's where it's dangerous to be alone, and simple human touch becomes more precious than anything. If you've never had depression that bad, then you should be extremely fucking thankful. You should also be more considerate and less of a trash human being to others who suffer depression so bad, they feel their body and mind are being taken hostage by terrifying urges! You're the attention-seeker for watching a video that doesn't relate to you just to make a baseless quip.
@cliffkonkle3467
@cliffkonkle3467 3 жыл бұрын
YOU are a ATTENTION seeker
@Brainstormer976
@Brainstormer976 5 жыл бұрын
This poeple are not able to having a connection. This poeple are dangerous!!!so a isolation cell is a great solution. They act as if they are very pathetic. actually they are extremely dangerous.
@cliffkonkle3467
@cliffkonkle3467 3 жыл бұрын
YOU NEED HELP. YOU ARE PERSON WITH NO FEELINGS AND THAT IS VERY DANGEROUS. THAT'S HOW KILLERS AND NARCISSIST ARE BORN. YOU ARE THE ONE NOT ABLE TO HAVE CONNECTIONS.
@cristy0716
@cristy0716 2 жыл бұрын
Jesus is the answer! Have you tried calling out to Him!? If you haven’t then do it. He is the answer! He loves you so much and there’s real healing only in Him!
@katrinaweaver8486
@katrinaweaver8486 3 жыл бұрын
Jesus is the answer! #luke4:18 ask and it shall be given you...
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