Why is it a bad idea to have kids?

  Рет қаралды 151,522

Daniel Mackler

Daniel Mackler

Күн бұрын

My website: wildtruth.net
My Patreon: / danielmackler
••• A short talk explaining the three main reasons why I think people shouldn't have children.

Пікірлер: 2 600
@krool1648
@krool1648 7 жыл бұрын
Parents often use their children as a scapegoat and a punching bag.
@ilovemytribe
@ilovemytribe 6 жыл бұрын
I couldn't agree more. So true!!
@catdeluxeatday
@catdeluxeatday 5 жыл бұрын
True.
@gnostictruth1599
@gnostictruth1599 5 жыл бұрын
Facts. And they still expect a pat on the back for it....
@bladesandflannels4665
@bladesandflannels4665 5 жыл бұрын
Yep, I sure know what that’s like
@thediabolicalempath7246
@thediabolicalempath7246 5 жыл бұрын
KROOL And narcissist abuse them.
@nkolemwaba2526
@nkolemwaba2526 6 жыл бұрын
What you said about passing on trauma, I wish that more parents would admit that.
@exempligratia101
@exempligratia101 2 жыл бұрын
My own mother is the textbook example of what you say! Inter generational trauma is a phenomenon that many people take for granted and ignore. And then, when the triggers or situation arises, they realize way too late. I will never let my trauma (adapted and socialized by my family) pass onto my unborn children.
@thehealthpromotion7024
@thehealthpromotion7024 2 жыл бұрын
That is the least of my problems. They are just a bad investment financially.
@Vera-dg3hf
@Vera-dg3hf Жыл бұрын
@@Craig121000 right, unless you marry rich or win the lottery, can't agree more.
@rodschmidt8952
@rodschmidt8952 Жыл бұрын
So... it's better never to be born, than to be raised imperfectly?
@donacatanguma
@donacatanguma Жыл бұрын
@@thehealthpromotion7024 That’s basically at the root of arguments against teenage pregnancy- that children are not cost effective. Unfortunately, western culture places a large value on money and power. It’s not designed, at least in its present iteration, to promote a quality of life for any sentient being.
@YraKyna
@YraKyna 4 жыл бұрын
I'm 27 and I never plan on having kids. Life is hard enough as it is. So I'd rather focus on myself, my hobbies, my passion, and my happiness. Parenthood is not for me.
@thecelticdruid.6681
@thecelticdruid.6681 4 жыл бұрын
Yeah,... All about "YOU, YOU YOU" and child free people say parents are selfish.. LOL.
@mrmaclovin255
@mrmaclovin255 4 жыл бұрын
@@thecelticdruid.6681 aww somebody is butt hurt because they had a child instead of a life. Your in denial. Fyi it's extremely selfish to have a child that didn't ask to be born because and I quote "they look cute".
@palomaschannel
@palomaschannel 4 жыл бұрын
Andrew Dexter oh poor you. Jealous much?
@thecelticdruid.6681
@thecelticdruid.6681 4 жыл бұрын
@@palomaschannel LOL, not in the least bit jealous, I have no regrets about having two loving adorable children that I have bonded with, so much more than I could with a friend or an animal. I have had my life, and my freedom and have settled down, for those who think they can carry on wanting more freedom are just greedy self obsorbed . My children are older now got my freedom back and it's all been worth it. Child free people miss out on that special bond a mother and daughter has, a father and son. I have been blessed, I have joy in my life, what's there to be jealous about? Now I challenge you to come back with something at least intelligent!!
@God.sDaughter
@God.sDaughter 4 жыл бұрын
Andrew Dexter Between Someone who gives birth to children so that THEY can take care of him or her when at their old age VS someone who doesn’t want to have children because they have a life of their own to accomplish and live thus not depending on anyone. Tell me this, who is much more selfish between the two? Who really is the selfish person?
@wheatstonebridge
@wheatstonebridge Жыл бұрын
This was 8 years ago and its even worse and harder now.
@silas6173
@silas6173 4 ай бұрын
He could have made this during the 2008 Great Recession and your comment would still be true!
@TheSpazModic
@TheSpazModic 6 жыл бұрын
It's ironic...the most conscientious people are the ones not having children!
@tim3854
@tim3854 6 жыл бұрын
no coincidence
@DominickDecocko
@DominickDecocko 5 жыл бұрын
is that proven by data?
@kpimkpim349
@kpimkpim349 5 жыл бұрын
You think this guy is conscientious? lol
@adampinkusiewicz5716
@adampinkusiewicz5716 5 жыл бұрын
You say "conscientious", i say misguided.
@randompanda3415
@randompanda3415 5 жыл бұрын
If that was the case, atheists, who have the lowest birth rates and are therefore going extinct, would also be the ones that participate most in social programs, donate the most, and help out the most during catastrophes. But according to numerous studies, it is Christians with high birthrates that are doing that far more frequently. I do like the idea that you guys are essentially advocating for your own extinction. Kind of funny actually. Also, population growth is set to reverse until 2070, so really, you're just shooting in your own foot.
@cheesecake4143
@cheesecake4143 4 жыл бұрын
Why bring a kid knowing that life is full of suffering
@mochilover7053
@mochilover7053 4 жыл бұрын
It is not full of suffering. You are spitting in the face of the people who lived before you. You probably live in the first world saying that kind of thing. Suffering makes the strong the strong, and without it we would be a bunch a lazy blobs living for our own material gain. That's way more dangerous than what most English speaking countries have to go through on a daily basis.
@syrenaxhaferi7278
@syrenaxhaferi7278 4 жыл бұрын
i thought that when i was a kid; it's logical
@cheesecake4143
@cheesecake4143 4 жыл бұрын
@@mochilover7053 i live in the third world bruh just for facts
@cherrymilk5590
@cherrymilk5590 4 жыл бұрын
@@mochilover7053 there is still suffering in the first world. Health conditions, abuse, rape, sickness, murder, etc. Acute stress can make you, but the traumas of life can break you.
@mochilover7053
@mochilover7053 3 жыл бұрын
@@cherrymilk5590 Those things have always existed, but lesser so now. Yet, they never were a reason to not have kids up until now; when everything needed to be perfect to raise a child.
@Priya-rf7ov
@Priya-rf7ov 3 жыл бұрын
Im child FREE by CHOICE... turning 40 next year... the older I get the more i think i made the best decision.
@robbykiller2323
@robbykiller2323 3 жыл бұрын
Do U regret it sometimes?
@leighnapier4505
@leighnapier4505 2 жыл бұрын
Yeah, you’d prolly end up w one of these narcissistic brats.
@mianeculcea6789
@mianeculcea6789 Жыл бұрын
Good for you, it's the best decision I made in my life, and because of it I have a lot of free time (to pursue my hobbies) money and peace of mind. I love the time I can spend with my husband, we go out everyday, we travel a lot, I lived in 4 countries...there is only a regret about having a childfree life...that is I cannot have at least 10 childfree lives.
@daviedood2503
@daviedood2503 Жыл бұрын
That's called a coping mechanism bc now u CAN'T have children.
@gray3589
@gray3589 Жыл бұрын
to be honest, i have many bad experiences that I'm really thankful for
@pomfpomf21
@pomfpomf21 3 жыл бұрын
The anger in parents is beyond scary I see it almost everyday
@darkfuelfragment6223
@darkfuelfragment6223 5 жыл бұрын
Bringing kids into this world, such as it is... is like bringing a soul into hell, it's not for eternity...but it'll feel like it to them.
@UknownWorlds
@UknownWorlds 3 жыл бұрын
Your right
@confirmjannati
@confirmjannati 2 жыл бұрын
Yeah
@jb-xc4oh
@jb-xc4oh Жыл бұрын
I'm sorry but you are fu*ked in the head. Life is a gift, without life there is nothing.
@midorigreenT-xb7ej
@midorigreenT-xb7ej 2 ай бұрын
agreed
@prismbrandingrealestatebra6301
@prismbrandingrealestatebra6301 Ай бұрын
Those who can't raise themselves raise children to hide the fact that they themselves are still children. ........but they don't fool me.
@Ana-tt8rv
@Ana-tt8rv 3 жыл бұрын
Children deserve parents who've done their healing. A 100% true. Both my parents had difficult childhoods and am not being ungrateful or anything, but I've found myself being a "therapist "to them listening hours on end to issues from their childhood and it never got reciprocated. I designed my life in a way not to trigger them or cause them pain that most of the time I end up feeling empty. Now, I don't have enough energy to deal with my own children that am dealing with unsolved issues of my own.I don't think I would want children.
@blackcurrantpop
@blackcurrantpop 3 жыл бұрын
Good point. I sometimes feel regret that I didn’t have kids. But like you my parents used to me resolve their unresolved trauma from tgeir childhoods. I became their therapist and tgey never had the headspace to deal w my problems. Ended up trying to sort myself out for years. Def not a great place for a child asI would problably not be there for my kids. Kids really need parents that can provide emotionally, maturely, and financially. If you have lots of issues you will def re-enact them out on your kids. I grew up hating being in this world and suffering from a young age.
@Ana-tt8rv
@Ana-tt8rv 2 жыл бұрын
@@blackcurrantpop am sorry to hear that you had a similar experience. In my teens leading upto my college, I've tried to play the same therapist to other people around me until I hit a curb and could not go on any further. Am healing now. Hope you find peace and happiness. Sending love,good luck 👍
@barcodekilla1138
@barcodekilla1138 2 ай бұрын
No kid ever should play "therapist role" for his parent period
@user-vt5gk8fn4v
@user-vt5gk8fn4v Жыл бұрын
”Build a society around healing trauma” 👍👍
@MaritaDiary
@MaritaDiary 4 жыл бұрын
I wanted children to create a happy family that I didn't have. But just last year. I've become more mature and healed from the past. And now me and my wife agreed that we don't want kids.
@JohnDoe-xk1dv
@JohnDoe-xk1dv 4 жыл бұрын
Beautiful comment. I've met a number of parents who thought they can fix their past issues, or their current relationship problems, by having a kid, or several. Surprise, surprise, it seldom ever works.
@thecelticdruid.6681
@thecelticdruid.6681 4 жыл бұрын
To bring a child into the world takes planning, responsibillity, wisdom, love, patience, sacrifice, maturity, disapline. Compassion and selflessness. Something child free people lack, but respect is a must and we must respect their choice. I was once child free, but I felt something was missing.
@JohnDoe-xk1dv
@JohnDoe-xk1dv 4 жыл бұрын
@@thecelticdruid.6681 so, you've just insulted everyone who is child free. That's called hypocrisy. You might want to concentrate on finding some of the qualities you've just insisted child free people don't have in yourself instead? Rather than start describing groups of people you don't know in this way.
@christins.1481
@christins.1481 4 жыл бұрын
@@thecelticdruid.6681 I have all those qualities. Married 18 years too. Baby fever never hit me and so I never wanted kids. I'm 37. And also, when you become a parent, you're a parent until the day you die, not until you're child turns 18. I have so many people saying. "It's only 18 years." That's the dumbest comment ever. Kids are never ending. Even if you have kids at a young age and your kid turns 60. That is still your child. Children will always be children to their parents, no matter their age. I'm 37. My Dad still calls me his "little girl" because I'll always and forever be his "little girl", even when I turn 50. And as for selflessness, I would die for a child I don't know to ensure that child's safety. I just never had a desire for children.
@deeblair6700
@deeblair6700 3 жыл бұрын
@@thecelticdruid.6681 STOP saying you were "childfree" once. NO, you weren't. Childfree people NEVER have children because it's a choice they made. You are a parent.
@krool1648
@krool1648 7 жыл бұрын
This world is too dangerous for children.
@zaynforrest2788
@zaynforrest2788 5 жыл бұрын
I agree
@Rose_Ou
@Rose_Ou 4 жыл бұрын
@@numinousmud4 pedophiles are only among people. Animals mate when they are mature.
@gvis8217
@gvis8217 4 жыл бұрын
@@numinousmud4 comparing humans with animals is pretty pointless. Animals are dumb and don't think, humans (at least the smart ones) do.
@mariabell6787
@mariabell6787 4 жыл бұрын
...and for adults as well, sadly...
@tuinfarto608
@tuinfarto608 4 жыл бұрын
@@gvis8217 humans are animals...
@SamSoMite421
@SamSoMite421 5 жыл бұрын
No one has a child for the contentment of a being they don't know. WE CHOOSE to have a child to satisfy OUR own needs - this within itself is a self serving act.
@AP_777W
@AP_777W 4 жыл бұрын
Brilliantly said!
@StorminMormin91
@StorminMormin91 4 жыл бұрын
Living is a self-serving act. So what’s your point? Is it immoral to live?
@addajjalsonofallah6217
@addajjalsonofallah6217 4 жыл бұрын
@R B Stop lying
@addajjalsonofallah6217
@addajjalsonofallah6217 4 жыл бұрын
@@StorminMormin91 So if people don't want kids who cares
@StorminMormin91
@StorminMormin91 4 жыл бұрын
Ad Dajjal Son of Allah that’s fine if they don’t. Just don’t assume those that do are selfish
@annas.6125
@annas.6125 5 жыл бұрын
My biological parents suck. They only gave me misery. As far as i can remember. Poverty and emotional abuse to add on.
@God.sDaughter
@God.sDaughter 4 жыл бұрын
Are you doing well now?
@d4rksh4rk56
@d4rksh4rk56 4 жыл бұрын
@@God.sDaughter i think his dead
@levo2344
@levo2344 3 жыл бұрын
Same. I hate them. They act like they own me and that I owe them something. I don't want to have my own kids.
@muffs55mercury61
@muffs55mercury61 3 жыл бұрын
Parents who are narcissists should never have had kids in the first place. Sorry you went thru all of that.
@Ltmasswashington
@Ltmasswashington 3 жыл бұрын
Same. I hate mine. They are stupid and poor.
@Elfen41
@Elfen41 6 жыл бұрын
I'm 41 and never had children and I just can't bring a child into this world. I agree with you that the earth is overcrowded and to bring a child into this absolutely miserable world would be a tragedy.
@ResidenceEvil45
@ResidenceEvil45 5 жыл бұрын
I agree! And it's deteriorating rapidly. I just think - how many times I was offended by other small minded people and unfairness of life... that I just don't want anybody else to experience the same!!!
@piotrmotyka1004
@piotrmotyka1004 4 жыл бұрын
The world itself is beautiful, it is the people who make it miserable.
@mistersmith265
@mistersmith265 4 жыл бұрын
@@penlavits3305 at the age of 41, I doubt he's been single his whole life.
@penlavits3305
@penlavits3305 4 жыл бұрын
@@mistersmith265 well with the current pandemic overpopulation isn't a problem anymore. Especially with all those slow Americans.if he doesn't want to have children with an American i totally get that because they aren't too bright.
@mistersmith265
@mistersmith265 4 жыл бұрын
@@penlavits3305 Or maybe he just don't want kids. Ever thought about that? Just because someone is in a loving relationship doesn't mean they have to add kids to it.
@jasminehetherington158
@jasminehetherington158 6 жыл бұрын
Our culture glorified having children, especially your own biological ones, which I find is wrong. Women are under a lot of pressure to « procreate » or they feel as though something s missing. We need to change our culture and respect people who wisely choose not to have children. Another sensible option is to foster or adopt those that are already there and crying out for love and care.
@Pawning
@Pawning 4 жыл бұрын
Yeah That's my point we shouldn't argue on people not having kids like my family my aunt doesn't want kids cause they have us and it's not bad to have kids either their decision is important
@vicentezegers1181
@vicentezegers1181 3 жыл бұрын
I belive that telling somebody they are not wise because they had a children, is just as rude and disgusting as to tell their kid that he shouldnt exist because he is a waste of space and resourses. I don't know if that is what you were trying to say but just as you can decide to not have any children, people can decide to have them, and there is nothing wrong in choosing that.
@mushroomkaiyoti111
@mushroomkaiyoti111 3 жыл бұрын
@@vicentezegers1181 yes there is something very wrong with that... why? Because all reasons for having children biologically are inherently selfish. You cannot debunk this truth. It is morally wrong as well to bring a life into a world of suffering and inevitable death without their consent. All people who breed are sociopaths.
@bonsummers2657
@bonsummers2657 2 жыл бұрын
The reason to have children, as I see it, is for making more of attractive, beautiful, and inspiring people, if that is you to begin with, and, the matter of heritage,…. who do you want to make for the future of the world. Racial and ethnic heritage is something to appreciate, and that goes for all types.
@33TimeTraveler
@33TimeTraveler 4 ай бұрын
adopting will encourage people to have more children ... it looks like a solution but it's not ! think about it twice ... with your mind and not with your heart !
@cynthiaallen9225
@cynthiaallen9225 6 жыл бұрын
I never wanted kids and didn't have them. It seemed so unappealing to me. All of my sibs did and every family get together was void of adult conversation. My parents did take out their unresolved issues on us and they were winging it, like most people. I'm sure that played into my decision but I wasn't fully conscious of it. I had too much pain to work on at the time, and was very aware of it. I too, like kids but prefer German Shepherds.
@thecelticdruid.6681
@thecelticdruid.6681 4 жыл бұрын
Animals are a poor substitute for a child, they may have their own way of showing love by affection but they can't talk and say "I love you Dsd/mum", when they say that it's a job well done and all the pain and sacrifice was really worth it in the end. A dog has a short life span, a child is a life time!!!
@cynthiaallen9225
@cynthiaallen9225 4 жыл бұрын
@@thecelticdruid.6681 I agree, kids are a job. A lifetime commitment. Too many people have them without thinking or being prepared. I'm glad I chose dogs. It was a very conscious choice. I may have been a good mother because I've been through therapy and am well educated, etc. But I never really desired it.
@mrmaclovin255
@mrmaclovin255 4 жыл бұрын
@@thecelticdruid.6681 kids don't say "I love you" they say "hi I am here to ruin your life and dreams and make sure you are never happy again"
@Loverboy19691
@Loverboy19691 4 жыл бұрын
@@mrmaclovin255 LOL !!! Here you are again. If what you say is true why am I so incredibly happy most of the time? Why do I have joy and happiness in my life, why do I feel so much happiness to see the delight on our children's faces on Christmas morning?. You are only see the negative side to it as you have not experienced the the positive side to it. I strongly feel I would've failed as a human being if I didn't produce children, or if I hadn't been there for them, spent quality time with them,.............what have you achieved Mr Arthur Morgan ? (LOL)
@mrmaclovin255
@mrmaclovin255 4 жыл бұрын
@@Loverboy19691 actually enjoying life is an achievement. Having children pushes away enjoyment. So it is not an achievement
@denisethegood
@denisethegood 2 жыл бұрын
I think it comes down to ignorance. Many who choose not to have children have opened up their eyes to the horrific problems of our planet and how those problems are our responsibility, ours to blame. (Having children in a pandemic?!?!) People will also say they knew real love for the first time when they held their baby in their arms - what a sad existence! I have known the deepest of love ever since I met the first bird I’d feed every day as a small child! The love for animals, nature, goodness only grows and grows - without adding life to it.
@dmackler58
@dmackler58 2 жыл бұрын
Agreed!!
@LuckiestStarByFar
@LuckiestStarByFar 2 жыл бұрын
That's beautiful.
@KudaMan
@KudaMan Жыл бұрын
The animal u fed was offspring…that birds parents had kids. You wouldn’t have had that moment if they didn’t have kids….
@Vera-dg3hf
@Vera-dg3hf Жыл бұрын
Love your comment. Beautifully said.
@Vera-dg3hf
@Vera-dg3hf Жыл бұрын
@@KudaMan True. But that's not the point. She was talking about the sadness of "being in love" only after holding an unborn child in your arms. The fact that you live 20-30 something years and you never experienced that feeling, its a sad existence. You can find love by learning to love yourself.
@violetsky1285
@violetsky1285 3 жыл бұрын
"We're not going to go extinct from lack of breeding but from overbreeding" Agree so much
@blacklyfe5543
@blacklyfe5543 Жыл бұрын
That will never happen because we won't be alive to found out and they'll live on other planets thousands or millions of years from now
@bobak5126
@bobak5126 Жыл бұрын
Nobody asked me, but I think greed is our main problem. Remove the greed, and there would be no wars and enough resources for everyone.
@sandys9104
@sandys9104 6 жыл бұрын
I totally agree with this man 100 percent. Why have kids so they can suffer and go through pain and sorrow. Besides there are too many bad parents anyway.
@ResidenceEvil45
@ResidenceEvil45 5 жыл бұрын
And plus - in the end your kids will die. All I can think off is that my child will die! Isn't it the most tragic thing ever? Other people would say - oh it's the law of nature, everybody will die... but that doesn't really help it!!!
@sl5311
@sl5311 4 жыл бұрын
I don't agree. My wife and I did therapy before we met and got married and it made us a thousand times better parents. I know our family has positively influenced other parents around us in ways we will never know. In the early 1960s when I was born nobody talked about sexual or emotional abuse. Segregation was still legal. So much has changed in my life. Consciousness is expanding.
@addajjalsonofallah6217
@addajjalsonofallah6217 4 жыл бұрын
@@Pawning right which is why I'm not having children They don't have to suffer because they are victims of life's wickedness
@MustObeyTheRules
@MustObeyTheRules 4 жыл бұрын
Our body’s are just DNA replicators. That’s it.
@penlavits3305
@penlavits3305 4 жыл бұрын
@@ResidenceEvil45 lmao so your supposed to enjoy all the benefits of life. Good and bad. Whereas they susposed to go into the toilet i get you 🙂. Do you really die when you pass on your knowledge. You don't even know if you're kid(s) will be the people to solve world hunger or bringing the world together in unity. You don't know but already decided that its life will be shitty and sad maybe because of how your life was doesn't mean your kid will share your fate. Smh this guy in the video, his reasons are poor as f. Its a good thing he is not pass on this bad advice to others oh wait he is and you guys are eating it up smh.
@marthawoodworth
@marthawoodworth Жыл бұрын
I was severely abused by my mother as a child, so I never had children because I was afraid I would abuse them; especially because I love children. I love your courage.
@NegativSpace-pd6cz
@NegativSpace-pd6cz Жыл бұрын
Your fear of abusing your own children is what would make you a good parent.
@Redflowers9
@Redflowers9 11 ай бұрын
​@@NegativSpace-pd6cznot necessarily
@THEWORLDMUSICSTAR
@THEWORLDMUSICSTAR 3 жыл бұрын
Since I was 17 I knew I didn’t want to have kids. Now I’m 23 and so glad because I am definitely not changing my mind. The world is simply fucked up I hate the fact that I was born why would I bring another soul.
@renek2913
@renek2913 Жыл бұрын
Having the same thoughts as you. If strangers have no qualms dictating that you are wrong for not breeding, then I don't ever want to bring kids into this world knowing they will definitely face the same thing.
@Bradley9967
@Bradley9967 Жыл бұрын
Your about 25 now which is still very young. I'd just ask you do you think that you will ve happy without kids? If you live to 100 what are you going to do with your life without kids? How are you going to find meaning? I know you see this differently to me.
@Bradley9967
@Bradley9967 Жыл бұрын
@The Squad Does your BF know you feel this way? Sex is a very important part of a relationship, especially to men. (Despite what he may have told you) You should desire him all over you. Try and get help for this issue. I can only speculate why you feel this way OCD, past truma, didn't grow up with a brother or phobia. Issues with you being impregnated are a symptom of a wider issue. To 'solve' this you could inject yourself with his swimming team. But you have wider problems.
@samuelbeltran3058
@samuelbeltran3058 Жыл бұрын
@@thesquad827 how do you think your parents made you? Are your parents disgusting for having you that’s what you basically said.
@thesquad827
@thesquad827 Жыл бұрын
@@samuelbeltran3058 umm did i ask to be born all of us dont ask
@bmw21323
@bmw21323 5 жыл бұрын
I do not want children for these exact reasons. I had a vasectomy recently to be sure of that, and my girlfriend doesn't want kids either. Should I ever want to raise a child, I can always adopt. We have enough children in the system that need help, that it almost seems selfish to bring one into the world.
@golgotha3938
@golgotha3938 5 жыл бұрын
In the nicest possible way your genes aren't strong enough to survive. A person who biologically wants children must have better genes than someone who doesn't. I'm not talking about someone who wanted kids but never found someone i'm talkng about someone who refuses to have them when the can.
@jimcrow7165
@jimcrow7165 4 жыл бұрын
The parents of those children who need adoption didn't think like you do and you are solving their problems. You can be all altruistic but it's selfish assholes breeding whose kids you are adopting.
@bmw21323
@bmw21323 3 жыл бұрын
@@golgotha3938 Do you have any research to back this claim up? I am curious.
@bmw21323
@bmw21323 3 жыл бұрын
@@jimcrow7165 And I am firmly in support of affordible birth control for all to prevent unwanted pregnancies to irresponsible people.
@bmw21323
@bmw21323 3 жыл бұрын
@@JackDamjien77 What are you talking about?
@Mari-hb5do
@Mari-hb5do 4 жыл бұрын
A lady once told me ‘ Go explore, travel. Don’t abdicate your dreams for someone else, regardless of who they are. The right person will live your dreams with you, not take them away.’ And she’s so true. I’m not completely taking away the option of being a mother but I’m considering all the pros and cons and honestly, if I am to have children I’d rather adopt children who need a loving home. And even then, only if I’m completely mature emotionally, as I come from an abusive household and developed PTSD and depression due to it. I would rather focus on my career and explore the world before anything. Also, you’re so right! My bs ‘parents’ constantly brag about being the best when they only berated me, controlled me and never cared. Which is why I cut ties and trying to live my life as I want it to be.
@daviedood2503
@daviedood2503 Жыл бұрын
This "sounds" like a good idea, until it isn't. You're not exactly OLD so those thoughts an older person has, hasn't reached u yet. Maybe u didn't think about it actually. Once a person gets to the point where it's actually said they can NOT have children anymore, this is when they comit self trashing from childhood abuse and trauma. The risk of pregnancy is now gone so they relax on it. Furthering their problems.whike ending up utterly ALONE. alone sounds good until it doesn't. Then it's too late. An old lady smelling like cat urine and an unkept house bc she just gave up.
@Clowncentral101
@Clowncentral101 Жыл бұрын
@@daviedood2503 excellent point.
@NE0Nwhip
@NE0Nwhip Жыл бұрын
​@@daviedood2503So easy for you to say. You can adopt and raise a kid for the rest of your life and show us how satisfying your life is
@daviedood2503
@daviedood2503 Жыл бұрын
@@NE0Nwhip I actually DID that tbh 13 years. I raised them from age 7 to 21. They grew up and wanted to go and experience life as an adult. Had ALOT of good times and memories honestly.
@gavinburns9516
@gavinburns9516 3 жыл бұрын
I'm 34 and just love not having any kids, they take up your money and freedom, most of my mates all have kids and deep down I know they wish they didn't
@kalencwil3924
@kalencwil3924 3 жыл бұрын
Not to mention the divorce rate and custody
@jb-xc4oh
@jb-xc4oh Жыл бұрын
You are one shallow son of a bi*ch to put a monetary value on a human life.
@eas827
@eas827 3 жыл бұрын
easy; wars, depression, hearbreaks, loss, sadness.
@TheCrownKing007
@TheCrownKing007 3 жыл бұрын
Illness
@papabear6364
@papabear6364 5 жыл бұрын
There has never been a good time to have kids no matter how civilized or "modernized" we become the world will still be a nasty place
@boogiekang619
@boogiekang619 4 ай бұрын
Wise words there brother
@_souldier
@_souldier 3 жыл бұрын
as a suicidal depressed kid with 4 forgotten siblings and stressed out parents. YES.
@Coincollector81
@Coincollector81 4 жыл бұрын
I'm 38 and i have no children. I agree with everything in this video. My parents were some of the worst examples. They are the type that i wouldn't wish any kid on.
@Coincollector81
@Coincollector81 4 жыл бұрын
@Blue Abusive , selfish and ignorance.
@Coincollector81
@Coincollector81 11 ай бұрын
@@user-qo2bs1kx5f Still no kid or kids.
@Coincollector81
@Coincollector81 11 ай бұрын
@user-qo2bs1kx5f Multiple reasons. I don't feel the need. I don't want to give up my freedom. I know it seems selfish but it is what it is. Narcissism runs deep in my family.. I don't want the parental responsibilities. Way too expensive. I don't take the best care of myself let alone someone else. Child support and custody laws and hypocrite laws that are one sided towards women and screws men.
@Coincollector81
@Coincollector81 11 ай бұрын
@user-qo2bs1kx5f My father was like a school yard bully. He only felt tough around small children. When comes to a man. He was a complete wimp.
@Coincollector81
@Coincollector81 11 ай бұрын
@@user-qo2bs1kx5f Biking. Coin and video game collecting. Occasional massages from the stress of life and work.
@Onepieceistheworstfuckinganime
@Onepieceistheworstfuckinganime 4 жыл бұрын
The one's who dislikes are the one's who want children
@haitamvfxer
@haitamvfxer 4 жыл бұрын
There are the one who want them cause they never had them
@SantaFeSuperChief1
@SantaFeSuperChief1 2 жыл бұрын
Or the ones who have children who can't accept the fact that he's 100% correct
@farinshore8900
@farinshore8900 Жыл бұрын
I made the decision not to have kids at 11 years old. Not because of overcrowding, but because the modern world is toxic - and i don't believe children deserve to be brought into a toxic world.
@darko783
@darko783 2 жыл бұрын
There is too much suffering in this world to bring more humans into it. To me, Having kids is immoral.
@lonelyflower7360
@lonelyflower7360 Жыл бұрын
Totally agree
@peacehope7365
@peacehope7365 Жыл бұрын
I've recently come to think that too. Parents are often seen as heroes, which is weird.
@jgtheman84
@jgtheman84 9 ай бұрын
@@mochilover7053what? A perfect life would be free from suffering.
@Georgemorales5559
@Georgemorales5559 Жыл бұрын
I’m 26 and there’s nothing that can change my mind on having kids life it’s just too damn great single and without kids working on retiring early 😀
@henrikhans467
@henrikhans467 Жыл бұрын
Same here man. Better to remain single and take this advice in mind: "Be like Achilles. Don't be Leonidas". Basically fight for yourself and your life.
@belle3055
@belle3055 Жыл бұрын
You guys speak like will live forever…. You might die tomorrow
@nemo7782
@nemo7782 4 жыл бұрын
Misery loves company, hence parents want everybody else to have children.
@ian1352
@ian1352 4 жыл бұрын
I always tell people the pros and cons from my experience. But then I'm not miserable.
@prariesasquatch5616
@prariesasquatch5616 4 жыл бұрын
I really don't want you having kids. Please don't you probably have fat people's genetics or cross-eyed somethings..... Or just use kids for welfare...... Please do not have kids then if you think of them as burdens. We were all once kids. My husbands mother has had abortions before him and after he was born. He is elated and grateful to be alive . I am 29 right now. I would gladly have my kids take care of me when I'm old and decrepit. Better than being physically/sexually abused at a nursing home. Most elderly abuse at nursing homes go unreported
@blythesaunders3124
@blythesaunders3124 3 жыл бұрын
I couldn’t agree more. 🙂 Having kids could be the worst decision someone could ever step on.
@haritikanand8502
@haritikanand8502 3 жыл бұрын
@@blythesaunders3124 only if they consider themselves completely incapable of being a parent. Complete your sentences
@mushroomkaiyoti111
@mushroomkaiyoti111 3 жыл бұрын
@@prariesasquatch5616 that is if your kids choose to do that - they owe you nothing
@hassaanr60
@hassaanr60 3 жыл бұрын
It’s normal to think as a parent that your children are your investments and will pay off when they grow up. That is a shitty mentality and to them I say DON’T HAVE KIDS!
@simon5005
@simon5005 6 жыл бұрын
I think most people have kids because they're brainwashed from Day One that it's what you're supposed to do. There are so many things a person can do with their lives! And it's obvious today that the kids are getting the sh*t-end of the stick because there are so many "adults" that want so much, and therefore, both have to work, and the kids get forgotten. It's damn sad.
@ResidenceEvil45
@ResidenceEvil45 5 жыл бұрын
@ Yes! Because the society tells you to do that - even if you haven't met your true love - you have to do that! And just because it's convenient for the government - they just want you to get married, have kids and work 3 times harder to support your wife and family. Are you 30? Why aren't you married? - they say...sounds so judgmental!
@mizzmini45
@mizzmini45 5 жыл бұрын
I realized it’s a business. The whole 30 and married thing is a system and man do a lot of people get hurt in the end
@chris-tm8ok
@chris-tm8ok 5 жыл бұрын
Suprising none of the dumb sheep have tried arguing with you yet probably too busy cleaning their kids mess
@dewightrobinson986
@dewightrobinson986 4 жыл бұрын
Simon 5005 nice of you to think my parents are brainwashed I like how you associate a couple people with everybody not every child is forgotten about
@Pawning
@Pawning 4 жыл бұрын
@Simon5005 It's not that they are brainwashed it's THEIR decisions and if we are not gonna have kids or our parents don't even want kids then the rest of us are not even in this world we don't exist if it weren't for our parents choosing to have kids and my other brain agrees and my other brain doesn't
@donacatanguma
@donacatanguma Жыл бұрын
One observation that has always fascinated me is the number of parents that don’t enjoy the company of their own children, or even children in general. 😢 And for sure, children are not dolls that you can put back on the shelf when you’re through playing with them. God Bless the vulnerable and defenseless among us, children and adults like.🙏❤️
@gracesanity6314
@gracesanity6314 5 ай бұрын
Heard this " bringing children into this world is like running towards a burning building"
@mvn4514
@mvn4514 3 жыл бұрын
Parenthood is a straight ticket to living hell. Who wants that nightmare? I am 45 years old, child free and loving it!
@Ajaysharma99969
@Ajaysharma99969 7 ай бұрын
Agreed 👍
@Eugene32852
@Eugene32852 4 ай бұрын
Right on ! I'm feeling the same
@carltonsoo829
@carltonsoo829 4 жыл бұрын
3 Things to consider. 1. I agree with him 100% 2. I TOTALLY agree with him 100% 3. Refer to the above
@Curyrus
@Curyrus 6 жыл бұрын
finally someone with some sense
@Somerandomguy0207
@Somerandomguy0207 3 жыл бұрын
NO
@mrmaclovin255
@mrmaclovin255 3 жыл бұрын
@@Somerandomguy0207 yes
@vicentezegers1181
@vicentezegers1181 3 жыл бұрын
@@mrmaclovin255 No
@vicentezegers1181
@vicentezegers1181 3 жыл бұрын
If you don't want children thats ok, but don't say that people that do have children don't have common sence. Is because of people that choose to have children that we havent gone extinct, and I care more for humans than for nature so I dont care if we use space that animals could use.
@jy840
@jy840 3 жыл бұрын
@Vicente Zegers well that’s an interesting way to say “I’m an eco terrorist and will teach my children to think the same way”
@tamarawest6203
@tamarawest6203 2 жыл бұрын
Having a child simply becuase you "want to" is so obviously selfish. Any sentence that involves the words "I want" is said by someone trying to serve a desire or need of thier own. Period.
@ritaputatunda
@ritaputatunda Жыл бұрын
Parenting is the hardest job in the world, and most of us jump into it with absolutely no job training.. Bringing up a human being is a huge, tough responsibility.. No wonder so many of us fail at it.. You are right, children deserve the best parents/parenting..
@fullario
@fullario 9 ай бұрын
I agree with everything you said and respect peoples' choice to have or not have kids...but why use the word "fail" here? Is there some concrete standard for "passing" when raising a child? I had kids at a young age (23) and am now 38, and to me parenting is one massive gray area of successes and failures. If I raise a 95% happy, healthy, well-adjusted child who maybe eats too much when he's sad because he watched me do the same growing up, have I "failed" him? Is he a "failure?" IMO this the downside of compartmentalizing and formalizing everything in life...real actual life is messy and exists on an ever-changing spectrum.
@MarcusSchmalzlockus
@MarcusSchmalzlockus 6 жыл бұрын
The most important reason: Life is suffering. You can avoid a huge amount of struggle by simply not creating a new suffering person. No one is harmed by not being born, whereas most people are harmed by their parent's selfish act of forcing them into existence. #Antinatalism
@ernestparham7558
@ernestparham7558 5 жыл бұрын
Facts
@gnostictruth1599
@gnostictruth1599 5 жыл бұрын
Perfectly said. Air tight. Simple, yet to confusing for most.
@sadiebrubaker3486
@sadiebrubaker3486 5 жыл бұрын
For a self healing channel, people really seem to have a negative outlook on life. Life is suffering, but is it really only suffering? Would you really be here still today if that's all that life is. Why do so many people participate in this one in akind phenomenon we call life if it is really not that worth It? I've been through my share of struggle and suffering to the point where I wanted to end it. In the end, I realized how thankful I am that my parents gave me life no matter what Iv been through. I know many people that have been throu way worse than I have and feel the same. If you really feel that existing is not worth the struggle, then I would strongly urge you to seek help.
@gnostictruth1599
@gnostictruth1599 5 жыл бұрын
Sadie Brubaker - You wrote, "Life is suffering, but is it really only suffering?". No suffering. Life should be about NO suffering. The fact that it is shows life and the human condition is beyond flawed to the point of being evil. Stop justifying suffering, it is never justified. You went on to ask, "Would you really be here still today if that's all that life is". Yes, for two reasons: 1) a built in survival instinct that is very strong, 2) because of a fear of death that most people refuse to admit too. Then you asked, "Why do so many people participate in this one in akind phenomenon we call life if it is really not that worth It?". They do for the following reasons in order: 1) an optimism bias which is sophomoric and irrational. 2) a genetic predisposition to breed. 3) Ego and pride, racism and tribalism/CULTure. Animals that breed, eat, and crap are simply doing what their animal instincts tell them without being able to reason or see the big picture. Humans have no excuse to continue breeding. None. This is not about being "happy" or sad or liking "life' or hating it. Don't be simplistic.
@sadiebrubaker3486
@sadiebrubaker3486 5 жыл бұрын
@@gnostictruth1599 If this is not about being happy or hating life then what makes you think that life should be about NO suffering. And you make alot of valid points, none of which really prove that people should stop having children tho. If this channel is about self growth, then a very valid reason for people to have families is for that. Having children is a very natural part if the human journey. It gives alot of people an actual meaning to life. It motivates people to take their proper place in society. Life is meaningless without responsibility, and alot of people find it in having babies. The family structure is very important to modern civilization and we can't just ignore that fact. Also, saying that life should be about NO suffering seems very simplistic. Whether I was generalizing suffering or not (which I wasn't) it is over optimistic and sophomoric to think that not having kids is the solution to end suffering.
@shapaco89
@shapaco89 9 жыл бұрын
Agree! It is so hard to talk to a parent who thinks he's a perfect parent. They are totally blind and think their kids are somehow guilty for their own misery.
@veruc_w
@veruc_w 9 жыл бұрын
shapaco89 Sooo true. Have two at home and they can't even speak to me anymore cause I gave them a mirror of their toxic principles. Suckers
@theultimatereductionist7592
@theultimatereductionist7592 6 жыл бұрын
"It is so hard to talk to a parent who thinks he's a perfect parent. They are totally blind and think their kids are somehow guilty for their own misery." BOOM! SO TRUE! The fact that breeders have no logic proves that breeders have NEVER done anything hard in their lives, that it is a MYTH that parenting is a "difficult" "job". FUCK political correctness.
3 жыл бұрын
@@JackDamjien77 hahah!
3 жыл бұрын
@@JackDamjien77 of course, there is direct action to portray as well. Do you still not understand my comment?
@Iwillfightcauseigotnothing
@Iwillfightcauseigotnothing 3 жыл бұрын
70 per cent of people i know/met aren’t qualified to have kids.... u need high level of intelligence, commitment, sheer will, financial stability, and freakin’ lots of time to spare... these are just the basics U might think “mmm then u want only a segment of the population to have kids?” Yes, karen. I want that. I’m pretty sure many kids/adults would agree with me
@kirilcherry7612
@kirilcherry7612 2 жыл бұрын
i agree with you whole heartedly
@doloresvangaal2248
@doloresvangaal2248 2 жыл бұрын
Only the most capable should have offspring. I've been saying (thinking) this for years. Another very unpopular opinion. But I'm happy I am not the only one who thinks this.
@henrikhans467
@henrikhans467 2 жыл бұрын
I agree with that as well. This maybe a bit (or a lot) out there, but I think a lot of bad parenting (and bad parents in general) is the result of too much influence from the lower brain (lizard (instinctual) and animal (emotional) parts) when it comes to decision making. My idea: create some brain implant(s) to increase activity in the cerebrum (more rational part of the brain) to help with human evolution through technology. Break the cycle, rise above nature, focus on Transhumanism!
@exempligratia101
@exempligratia101 2 жыл бұрын
1,000%! Population needs to be taken into more consideration than as an afterthought. After all, 1950’s suburbia never considered what would happen when population explosions affect a town/city. And it’s far better to have a human population based on higher quality of life WAY MORE than quantity of people.
@lioness2000
@lioness2000 2 жыл бұрын
I´m 21 and I know I never want kids. I have about 100 reasons and I agree with all of these. I´m living with my spouse, our life is so great: all the free time, good sleep and peaceful home. I feel like I´m growing as a person all the time.
@kidokacio
@kidokacio 7 жыл бұрын
I agree. I did choose not having children. Never regret is!
@gloria6498
@gloria6498 5 жыл бұрын
I fell into the pressures of societies bullshit!
@universeofopulence
@universeofopulence 5 жыл бұрын
Yeah same... wish I had more courage..
@gaararulesall
@gaararulesall 11 ай бұрын
Your the man Daniel. Parents love to push a narrative that puts them in the best possible life. The reality is that the majority of parents are unfit for the role and are doing it for themselves, not the child
@Childfree334
@Childfree334 8 ай бұрын
Look at our world. Parents are doing a sh*tty job.
@Gettothegone
@Gettothegone 5 ай бұрын
Exactly. Most people I know project themselves onto the child which is expected in such a narcissistic society
@universealchemy
@universealchemy 5 ай бұрын
People need to parent their own inner child instead
@Angaloth19
@Angaloth19 2 ай бұрын
💯👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
@onepunch5907
@onepunch5907 4 жыл бұрын
The only reasons people have kids is genetics and not wanting to die alone.
@fearless6694
@fearless6694 3 жыл бұрын
There courage in dying alone
@mercymercti0zeaz738
@mercymercti0zeaz738 3 жыл бұрын
not exactly i want want kids im not afraid to die alone actually im not afraid to die at all i just want to live a long life and i want to adopt but i do agree some bitches out here really be that selfish though. I do wish people were just more good overall and more open minded to the concept of not wanting children because to be frank some people dont need kids. anyways much love have a splendid day.
@bailujen8052
@bailujen8052 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah they don't want to end up like Jack Nicholson because his women left him and he is scared of dying alone
@haritikanand8502
@haritikanand8502 3 жыл бұрын
That's extremely narrow - minded There are always reasons for any relationship The only requirement is a deep way of thought and broad - mindedness
@mercymercti0zeaz738
@mercymercti0zeaz738 3 жыл бұрын
@@haritikanand8502 i mean i would say narrow minded because some people only have kids to pass genetics or to see what they would look like but i would say that it is not true that most people only have kids to pass genetics because that is generalizing a group and is similar to saying something like most white people are racist. Its not true its just generalizing a group into a stereotype
@ceciliapearson3610
@ceciliapearson3610 8 жыл бұрын
I was conditioned from a very young age that I would grow up, get married and have kids. I'm so thankful that it didn't happen that way and I'm grateful for this video. Too many people have kids because they enjoy the idea of having mini versions of themselves running around... I consider that to be a pretty shitty reason! haha - thanks Daniel. Stumbled across your work through the wormhole of the internet re: tapering off my meds (which I'm beginning in May) Thanks for your wonderful and arresting insight. Cecilia
@Afura33
@Afura33 6 жыл бұрын
Did you tappering go well? :)
@ruya789
@ruya789 5 жыл бұрын
The last thing I want in this world is a mini version of myself. I see so many people complain about themselves, their lives and then they bring mini me's into this world
@thecelticdruid.6681
@thecelticdruid.6681 4 жыл бұрын
Four years later I spot your comment "Mini me"'s"? You clearly don't know children well, children develop their own identities and interests, I don't share a lot of interests with my son, my daughter never got into action man toys simply because I liked them.
@dragonballz2410
@dragonballz2410 3 жыл бұрын
Not every one is cut out to be a parent, I agree there.
@sarahporter9979
@sarahporter9979 4 жыл бұрын
I'm 40 years old and been happily married (yes, really) for almost 20 years. My husband is a wonderful person - incredibly intelligent, kind, witty and understanding. AND very very patient. I love children dearly and work with them. Of course I've been asked if I have kids NON-STOP for half of my life. NO, I don't, and I never will. It sounds really strange coming from a woman in a very stable marriage who loves kids that she has no intention of having children, but there it is. I do sometimes wish that I wanted children, simply for the sake of passing on my husband's genes because of how amazing he is and feel like it's sort of a waste to not have kids with his genes, but we've both agreed that children won't be in the picture. There's an enormous pressure on me to have kids, also, because I'm an only child. I can't stand it when people cut me off in the middle of a discussion when they ask me if I have children and I say no, with "Well, you can't possibly understand..." BS. Don't go there. Don't ever use that on me, because it really is BS. I always hear people, especially mothers say "I didn't know what it was like to (insert some emotion/feeling/revelation here) until I became a mother." - oh, really??? Because I was all of those things back when I was a CHILD. You mean, you didn't think of, or feel those things until you were in your THIRTIES??? Wtf were you doing with your life???
@ad0906013
@ad0906013 3 жыл бұрын
Love you for your dogged perseverance. Take care and may you guys grow old together.
@dragonballz2410
@dragonballz2410 3 жыл бұрын
Just get a hamster then. It's practically the same thing.
@tanvirsourav83
@tanvirsourav83 2 жыл бұрын
Killed it with the point
@solomonsanabria7092
@solomonsanabria7092 Жыл бұрын
Misery loves company ppl love to know others walk and feel the same as them .
@rabbitsmuggler
@rabbitsmuggler Жыл бұрын
So you think being kid lets you know what it is like to be a mother? There are huge biological factors in motherhood and yes although I am sure you understand broad picture of parenthood, but you can't possibly fully understand what it is really like to be a parent. But I get that it is really annoying when people constantly remind you that, not very nice of them especially when you understand that it is kinda true.
@Europa1749
@Europa1749 5 ай бұрын
He was so right. Eight years later, the world is much worse.
@kbredderman
@kbredderman 3 жыл бұрын
To me, an even more arguable point is the insane notion that people who don’t have children, don’t, b/c they are selfish...really???? Parents think they are so self-less b/c they are run ragged half the time, but it’s for the betterment of their own kids that they created, their own decision, their little Mini-me’s, clearly an extension of themselves. Meanwhile us “selfish” people are visiting someone in the hospital that they couldn’t visit b/c they are out buying a minivan, or they are too busy taking junior to soccer, or at a chuckee-cheese nightmare, while we are helping the neighbor move apartments or taking a friend to the airport, or baby-sitting for another run-ragged parent...selfish...really???
@magicaree
@magicaree Жыл бұрын
So so true
@lbks16
@lbks16 11 күн бұрын
Don't take this so personally, some people like to push their opinions on others.
@heekyungkim8147
@heekyungkim8147 6 жыл бұрын
I have decided when I turned 35. Not to have kids. I think i made right decision for me. And i am not mature. 😎
@tim3854
@tim3854 6 жыл бұрын
I'm immature and don't want kids either, would you like to go for a coffee?
@heekyungkim8147
@heekyungkim8147 6 жыл бұрын
tim3854 ☕️
@Itsmenanananana
@Itsmenanananana 5 жыл бұрын
Me either, my husband and I decided to live our own life without kids. The only thing hard to deal with those elder people (not my parents) force us to have a baby just because the marriage coup needs to do that.
@timepass1236
@timepass1236 5 жыл бұрын
heekyung Kim do u learn Kung fu then?
@penlavits3305
@penlavits3305 4 жыл бұрын
One question have you been in a meaningful relationship
@treeseer1573
@treeseer1573 5 жыл бұрын
If you want kids great but before you decide to have one of your own , also decide to adopt a child who has no parents . Then you do something incredible for humanity.
@Metanoia444
@Metanoia444 5 жыл бұрын
Sunflowershowers that’s also how I feel
@tiggy4750
@tiggy4750 Жыл бұрын
Does that not encourage the irresponsible ? They can keep procreating with no care about what happens if they get pregnant? If everyone were to do this, we would have a society of irresponsible biological parents, who give up children at birth, and no "genes" from any responsible parents being handed down!
@casebycase7750
@casebycase7750 6 ай бұрын
Best video I ever watched. Having children in this day and age is one of the most selfish things an individual could do when thinking about all of the things that you mentioned on top of racism, sexism, oppression, poverty and inflation. There are so many factors that makes child-bearing or progeneration a selfish act.
@dougn2350
@dougn2350 3 жыл бұрын
100% spot on. The planet has too many humans and not a single political leader is talking about the problem.
@orasis
@orasis 2 жыл бұрын
"50% Of you need to go! Vote for me!" - You see why?
@dougn2350
@dougn2350 2 жыл бұрын
@@orasis ... Let me guess. Personal profit?
@orasis
@orasis 2 жыл бұрын
@@dougn2350 You'll never get voted in.
@neonxnational
@neonxnational 11 ай бұрын
the reason is simple. More humans, more taxpayers.
@KH-yy8cd
@KH-yy8cd 5 жыл бұрын
I was at work the other day and told a co-worker that I didn't want to have kids. She told me that I was "selfish". The nerve of some people!
@gnostictruth1599
@gnostictruth1599 5 жыл бұрын
Kevin Hill - Stay the course and good on you. When 'they' say things like that, they are just repeating without thinking because they are programmed (literally) to breed. Not subjecting a non-existent person to suffering, toil, and death is the most SELFLESS act you can do. Stay strong and true..
@KH-yy8cd
@KH-yy8cd 5 жыл бұрын
@@gnostictruth1599 wise words!!!!!!!
@runningwithscissors1564
@runningwithscissors1564 4 ай бұрын
Those who are truly selfish are those who have kids and don’t have the means to take care of them.
@shari382
@shari382 Жыл бұрын
We have no friends on this earth.
@catherineblair550
@catherineblair550 5 жыл бұрын
I hope I live to see the day where I can brag " I was a cat lady when being a cat lady wasn't cool"
@kmcq692
@kmcq692 Жыл бұрын
I love you!!!!!! 😂
@deepakshukla3327
@deepakshukla3327 6 ай бұрын
Agree with you. Children can rock your marriage. No sleep ..always working around them. No time for self and self care.
@krazeemetalchickstewart9961
@krazeemetalchickstewart9961 3 жыл бұрын
I had my tubal ligation when I was 21 and I am very happy with my decision more than ever before
@LadyFerenczy
@LadyFerenczy 5 жыл бұрын
When I have said to my friends that one of the reasons why I don't want to have kids is overpopulation they laugh at it and said what difference will make one kid. Plus I don't consider myself so special that I need to pass my genes. I'm 32.
@renticat
@renticat Жыл бұрын
That's why we're 8 billion now when back then we're still at 5 billion. Crazy
@catherineharber6514
@catherineharber6514 Жыл бұрын
I couldn’t agree more. That’s exactly the way I feel. I’ve been called selfish plenty of times for not having kids. Yet the very people calling me that have children and are horrible parents. And yes my parents are narcissists and psychopaths, and were awful caretakers. Since they’re so arrogant they have convinced themselves that they were the best parents ever. I think I’ll pass on bringing a child into an overpopulated planet full of solipsism.
@peacehope7365
@peacehope7365 Жыл бұрын
You're the opposite of selfish. I'd say you're selfless, kind and brave. The selfish ones are those having children when their lives are a mess
@catherineharber6514
@catherineharber6514 Жыл бұрын
That's so sweet. I certainly aim to be less selfish, and more kind and brave. I guess in my 20's I realized that since I did not get to have a childhood and develop a healthy sense of self/identity, I was going to use my early adulthood to discover my real identity. Which often gets deemed as "selfish" by the biggest narcissists with in a family-unit and/or group of childhood friends 😆. As I'm sure you as well have put a lot of thought and care when considering having children 😇.
@kellyjordan6440
@kellyjordan6440 Жыл бұрын
Let me stand up and applaud. I'm 52 happy NEVER been married or had kids. I knew all of these things at 21, sad most people die never knowing this...
@philipidoux6607
@philipidoux6607 11 ай бұрын
Same here. I knew that very young. Now 57 and SO glad I never had children!
@mosheweinfeld2726
@mosheweinfeld2726 8 жыл бұрын
At 22 years of age I have decided not to have children and am quite firm (at least now) on my reasons. If I do desire to raise a child later in life, adoption would be preferable. Additionally, I wanted to thank you for your style of presentation, the simple interview format. (Your other stuff is good too) A number of videos on these subjects flash fancy images at you which I find to be quite pushy.
@universalinsights3314
@universalinsights3314 5 жыл бұрын
it's good to see you taking such a responsible mature decision so early in life. I wish more ppl thought this way... If you want kids, adopt ones that already exist, instead of making new ones.
@universeofopulence
@universeofopulence 5 жыл бұрын
Hmmm... family pressure is something everybody can't oppose..
@anthony8818
@anthony8818 5 жыл бұрын
@@universalinsights3314 After going throught depression for half of my high school experience. I decided at the age of 18 to not have kids. My parents are disappointed that they won't have any grandkids from me. But I have siblings that want kids. So I should be fine.
@isabellek1171
@isabellek1171 2 жыл бұрын
I agree with you being 19 right now, having this decision right now lifted a weight off my chest
@theultimatereductionist7592
@theultimatereductionist7592 6 жыл бұрын
We need COURAGEOUS people like you WAKING PEOPLE UP!!
@yawningchasm33
@yawningchasm33 5 жыл бұрын
not every orgasm deserves a name
@strikingly105
@strikingly105 3 жыл бұрын
I'm child free and want to remain that way.
@maravilloso002
@maravilloso002 6 жыл бұрын
Excellent observations. People who have kids seem to have great disdain towards individuals who don't.
@workingshlub8861
@workingshlub8861 6 жыл бұрын
i agree..people look at you like you have 3 heads when you say i do not want kids...i do not care what others do have all the kids you want.
@diana-cy4kj
@diana-cy4kj 6 жыл бұрын
Marvin Simelton I don't think it's disdain , it's more like good old - fashioned jealousy...
@yehmen29
@yehmen29 6 жыл бұрын
And surprisingly these are usually the same people who don't recycle, are climate change deniers... You would think they would want to fix the planet for their kids and grandkids. As Daniel said in another video, in 20 years' time, the Earth is going to be a scary place to be... and we can't emigrate to another planet or to a space station!
@diana-cy4kj
@diana-cy4kj 6 жыл бұрын
Yeh Men Yeah , you're absolutely right.
@thevagabondsgambit
@thevagabondsgambit 6 жыл бұрын
Actually HE DOES NOT REALLY KNOW WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT... Marvin Simpleton... :) Hehehehehehe... Read my comments, btw, and comment if you may... Let's see if you can score points with both your views... Joseph theVagabond, VIVA, Ecclessia Catholica! Vive, benedixitque Deum, familiae!
@Torischannel1
@Torischannel1 3 жыл бұрын
This why I'm so grateful my father was older when I was born. Im now 19 and my father is 67. My mother is 50. I have seen throughout childhood my mother being a complete child when it comes to things. Lashing out, emotionally unstable, it was only within the last 2 years that I was able to be around my mom and feel secure. My father on the other hand has always been that way. I have never heard my dad cuss or lash out. He's never laid a finger on me in terms of punishment. If it were not for my father I wouldn't be the women I am today. The funny thing is that my mother grow up in a nuclear family were as my fathers childhood was in short, horrible. Dont have kids if you haven't dealt with past issues. While my fathers past often saddens me, I'm incredibly grateful he actively choose to move though it before having a child.
@Canadian_Eh_I
@Canadian_Eh_I 3 жыл бұрын
What did your dad go through?
@davideatwell6577
@davideatwell6577 Жыл бұрын
Glad it's worked out
@christophervishy8273
@christophervishy8273 11 ай бұрын
I like your story and I think it is wiser to advise people to have children when they are older than to abandon the idea of children altogether. Some people will want to have families, humanity will still continue. But it's up to us to ensure it continues in a positive direction by fostering maturity and being honest with ourselves re: is it right for me?
@TofuTeo
@TofuTeo Жыл бұрын
I'm 23 now and this echoes my views so well. Interesting how this video was made 8 years ago, when I was just 15. How these truths have stayed constant.
@susanm7887
@susanm7887 6 жыл бұрын
My beautiful 28 yr old daughter has been saying that for years. I finally accepted it and I’m good with it now. I want my daughter to have freedom to do whatever she wants! She loves learning and helping others. Having kids would only weigh her down. She plays the piano and she loves to compose music and she also loves her times of solitude when she needs it! I totally agree with you! Thanks for being so honest. I finally heard someone other than my daughter who feels the same way!
@sarahgrace6096
@sarahgrace6096 4 жыл бұрын
His point about parents not having done their inner work being terrible parents is valid.
@naiakiki
@naiakiki 5 жыл бұрын
I have cared for children since I was 12 and spent much of my adult life as a nanny. I am now 28, married and have a 16 year old stepdaughter. I absolutely love children but do not want to have my own, blood children. There is constant pressure put on me to have kids by my parents and other people in my life. The thing is, I have never wanted to have my own kids. I'm happy to spend a day, or have part time custody but I have no desire to become a full time parent. I spent all of my 20s happily supporting my stepdaughter because her mother has 2 other children from 2 other fathers who are not present in the kids lives, so most of our resources go to supporting her as much as we can. I want to have time in my life to travel and explore some of my own interests, not start all over at the age of 30. In some ways I feel like I have the best of both worlds. I have many children in my life who rely on me and love me and I love them too....and that's all I need
@hetjamesfield4473
@hetjamesfield4473 3 жыл бұрын
If any1 told you that it is selfish not to have kids... Just say to them that it is selfish TO HAVE kids today, and ask them theyr reason why they wanted a child these days... Youll see the answers... It all comes at the end that they just want a little copy of them-selfs, and that is the max theyr intelect goes sadly..
@runningwithscissors1564
@runningwithscissors1564 4 ай бұрын
It’s all for the attention they get through their children. That’s all that matters to them.
@Melly16yr10
@Melly16yr10 3 жыл бұрын
Only reason I can't is because I'm not in a financial good situation at all. I'd rather save a life who is already here. I like the idea of being a foster parent or adopt 😄.
@alexandra626ify
@alexandra626ify 2 жыл бұрын
Huge correlation with intelligence and not having children. His last reason is so fucking true.
@CAVFIFTEEN
@CAVFIFTEEN 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this! I’ve known for a few years that I don’t want kids and constantly get told things like “you’ll change your mind” or “what if your girlfriend wants kids?” And other stuff like that. And that second one is a legitimate concern. It’s hard finding a girl that actually doesn’t want kids or is at least open to the possibility of not having children.
@walkingthroughghosts
@walkingthroughghosts 3 жыл бұрын
Just because you're a good and mature person is no guarantee that your offspring are going to be good people.
@angelgallardo
@angelgallardo 4 жыл бұрын
I totally agree with you! I have known for more than 30 years. I was 13 years old and I was worried about overpopulation. How can people see the long lines and how long it takes to commute from home to work and everywhere else. I'm a 54 year old man and I'm glad I didn't have any kids because I still want follow my dreams and make them come true. Great video!
@lindabalinda3237
@lindabalinda3237 2 жыл бұрын
You will die old and lonely
@moiusa
@moiusa 7 жыл бұрын
you're damn right! I have 0 and I love it!!!
@deejones3255
@deejones3255 4 жыл бұрын
@Musically Inclined 😂😂😂
@universeofopulence
@universeofopulence 4 жыл бұрын
....if only more ppl had the foresight.....most only have hindsight..😢
@MustObeyTheRules
@MustObeyTheRules 4 жыл бұрын
Musically Inclined I have to highly respect a parent willing to set the ego aside and admit that. Not many can.
@dragonballz2410
@dragonballz2410 3 жыл бұрын
A baby is a big responsibility. I'm sure Moe Ramirez was a handful.
@spenny9274
@spenny9274 2 ай бұрын
My parents are prime examples of people who present as “normal”, but neither one of them is mentally fit. They’re both extremely selfish, angry & narcissistic. No surprise- they’re boomers..
@mxbvibes
@mxbvibes 3 ай бұрын
2024 and this rings more true NOW than 8 years ago… wholeheartedly agree!!!
@inolofatsenglekaba5026
@inolofatsenglekaba5026 Жыл бұрын
"Children deserve better"-essentially.
@love_prosperity
@love_prosperity 2 жыл бұрын
His supporting points are : 1. World is overcrowded already 2. There is also lot of sufferings and pain in this world,which is not at all worth it to experience.
@jasminflowerz1710
@jasminflowerz1710 3 жыл бұрын
My parents are a perfect example of people who should have *never* been parents. It's everything, including their personality type that made them *not* cut out for it, in fact, I *know* they would have been and would be *much* happier people had they "not".... and I would've been spared a lifetime of torment.
@BassTrombone95
@BassTrombone95 4 жыл бұрын
I don't personally want kids because at least in America, it's just not financially feasible anymore. Rent is expensive, college education is very expensive, and healthcare is even worse. Why would I bring more humans into this world if I cannot guarantee that I'll be able to support them? Most young people in America are so underpaid that having kids just isn't a responsible decision anymore, and I don't think that will change any time soon. Just giving birth to a kid costs like $10,000 even with insurance, and that's ONLY the birth.
@catherineobrien8696
@catherineobrien8696 4 жыл бұрын
None of his three reasons are the most important reasons not to have children. Life is full of suffering, constant uncertainty, most of the time the horrors of old age, and death. Spare children from that. THAT IS THE NUMBER ONE REASON.
@33TimeTraveler
@33TimeTraveler 4 ай бұрын
Indeed, the overpopulation argument is utter b.s that all antinatalists repeat non-stop on YT (agenda behind for sure) ... the real reason is suffering : we should not suffer in life otherwise, this is really a hell that no one should visit from any dimension !
@boogiekang619
@boogiekang619 2 жыл бұрын
There's so much in life without kids
@mya.xoxo_
@mya.xoxo_ Жыл бұрын
right. so much sleep you won’t be losing, so much money you won’t be losing, so much peace you won’t be losing.
@boogiekang619
@boogiekang619 Жыл бұрын
@@mya.xoxo_ or losing happiness
@boogiekang619
@boogiekang619 Жыл бұрын
Baby moves in freedom moves out
@boogiekang619
@boogiekang619 11 ай бұрын
I think people who have babies are just doing for attention shit I bet they'll regret it
@runningwithscissors1564
@runningwithscissors1564 4 ай бұрын
@@boogiekang619 A good majority of people have kids for the attention that they bring. They have to have all those likes on Facebook to feel good about themselves.
@plasmaarmelund
@plasmaarmelund 3 жыл бұрын
I love my kids but regret having them because of their mother who only got married to me in order to have children. That was her no. 1 motivation and of course that's bound to result in a failed marriage. She never loved me and I was always lowest on her list of priorities after our kids, her parents, her siblings, her female friends, and our pets. She would blame me for everything and always play the victim role. We were never aligned on parenting, either. I should never have entered into a relationship with her, but I was blinded by attraction and had low self-esteem at the time.
@Peace2dagawdz
@Peace2dagawdz 3 жыл бұрын
I couldn't imagine having a child and indoctrinating tf out of them 🤮
@User-19273
@User-19273 3 жыл бұрын
Can’t agree more. In my spiritual opinion, I always think that when socially accepted and intellectual but not emotionally and spiritually grown people have kids, they get to learn A LOT from raising children because they never can reflect themselves on their own.. and they are fated to learn their lessons in that way. But those who choose not to have kids with the reasons you say, already have so much wisdom that they don't need to learn from parenting.
@derbydrifter
@derbydrifter 6 жыл бұрын
Excellent video. The problem of having children is rooted in the reason people think they need to have relationships and have sex and can't survive without it. None of it is enduringly satisfying. It's like a drug; a continual series of fixes that don't work. Then they believe that having children is going to fortify themselves and their relationships.
@ayeshaahmad4953
@ayeshaahmad4953 6 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for saying this. I was feeling all these things but, I couldn't muster the courage to speak up. It is so difficult to go against the convention when everyone around you is forcing you to do what they consider as norma l. The Idea of bringing a child in this world makes me paranoid. I feel repulsive everytime people ask me when do I plan to have a child. Unfortunately, I just smile and try to appear calm but honestly, it just makes me immensely uncomfortable. I actually get depressed after each conversation. Thanks for putting up this video. I feel so much better after listening to you.
@JohnDoe-xk1dv
@JohnDoe-xk1dv 4 жыл бұрын
Classless and intrusive to ask you in any case 'when you are having children?' People are learning, but it's slow.
@wduprevil
@wduprevil 2 жыл бұрын
Always trust your instinct. People who have kids because of societal pressure are going to be emotionally absent parents.. if You don't have myopia and you can see the bigger picture, the world is only getting worse.
@luvburden5743
@luvburden5743 Жыл бұрын
Until the society change me having children is not an option.
@Mickey_JR
@Mickey_JR 3 жыл бұрын
I'm twenty years old,my half sister is eighteen years old,and we don't want kids,at all. My half baby sister is very annoying. My sister,and I wants to have fun with our lives. But my dad keeps bugging us about having kids. Nope...not gonna happen. I'm so done with the baby crying. My dad is irresponsible. He didn't even pay me or my sister child support. He can't take care of a dog. He even stole my grandpa's truck. I'm supposed to look up to him??? At least my uncle is my dad. I love my uncle. My dad is a loser!
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