Editing YOUR College Essays | The BEST Essay I've Read So Far

[@elevatedschool]

Over the last three years, we've edited more than 8000+ college essays and helped hundreds of seniors from around the world gain more than 600+ acceptances to top 20 schools. Want your essay professionally edited? Visit: www.elevated.school/editmyessay Where our students got in: www.elevated.school/2024results We recently made a playlist that covers EVERY college essay supplemental question! Check that out here: kzbin.info/aero/PL6kAlDuzWEqZdBiNfVndYm5IZr3uwOtE7

[@sumaiyatahsin4707]

These analysis videos are so much better than watching dozens of KZbin tutorials and reading tons of sample essays. Thank you!

[@systemloading45]

You don't understand how helpful you are!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your work is soooo appreciated

[@bgavd3695]

Hey, I have a question that if I can use Chatgpt to improve grammar and punctuations.

[@VaughnGoehrig]

Love how you emphasize practical strategies to make general takeaways and repetitive language more specific!

[@elevatedschool]

Hi friends!! For the next month (until 11/1/23), we’ll be selecting 3 of the commenters on THIS video for a FREE essay review! To qualify, all you have to do is like and reply to this comment with something you learned from this video :) FYI normally, we charge $225 for a professional common app review with feedback from two of our ElevatEd consultants!

[@aarohikulkarni8524]

Hey! Thank you for this video. I'd say I learnt the importance of analyzing other people's essays. Also, I really liked the tip about the usage of fun verbs, and how it just makes the essay so much more lively. I'd love to get my essay reviewed by you :)

[@sarahcarroll520]

This video honestly helped me so much with writing my Nat Merit Finalist app essay. I learned that talking about the process, adding specifics (even if they feel kinda niche), being vulnerable, and talking more about the solution than the problem helps to make all my Common App essays better 😊

[@pranavidantuluri1685]

This video was super helpful in writing my UNC Chapel Hill supplementals. The specificity was something I was clearly lacking, and this video highlighted that the more specific and personal, the better. This series motivated me a lot to think outside the box when writing my essays and I hope you continue it!

[@emilybaraceros4344]

Thank you so much! for all of your college writing tips! Your video has taught me to watch out for cliches in my essay and to be as descriptive as possible (show don't tell!). Looking forward to watching your next college essay editing video! :)

[@aleezacobras]

This video provided me with a reminder that the tone of the essay is really important, and being able to use different word choices to reflect and balance different tones can help an essay stand out.

[@Nati-zecherkos]

00:02 Learn how to make your college essays stand out and get into your dream schools. 01:52 The student's mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. 03:35 Gradual transition after witnessing mother's chemotherapy 05:26 Teaching basic survival skills and saving lives 07:15 The student's essay lacks specific details and needs more profound reflection in the conclusion. 09:05 The meaning of life shifted for the speaker from pursuing joy to serving others 11:23 Creating the ultimate chocolate chip cookie experience and sharing it with others. 13:10 The organic chemical reaction between amino acids and reducing sugars creates melanoidin compounds that provide color and flavor to brown foods. 15:09 Baking as an expression of admiration 16:55 Value the process of creating something remarkable 18:31 The essay started off strong but fizzled out towards the end. 20:06 The video discusses the emotional impact and authenticity of a college essay.

[@tanvi6033]

this is by far one of the best series/programs you have implemented- seeing the edits hands on is more helpful than you could ever imagine

[@marina3934]

This is so so helpful! After watching this, I cut own a few sentences that I didn’t need and elaborated on certain things! Much appreciated!!

[@Izzatgold4747]

Hey, I think we can help each other. I need a partner on this. What do you say

[@bernardafrifa4587]

This has really build my confidence to send you my essay and I’m thankful for that

[@xinixperla8132]

This live edit is super helpful in cutting down unnecessary content and tightening up the overall structure! Great video, Kevin!

[@huntertharpe1917]

More great work from Kevin! I especially love how Kevin points out specific places where the student can explain themselves in more detail to create natural transitions!

[@elevatedschool]

Hi friends! It's happening again! From now until September 28th, we will be reviewing YOUR supplemental and UC essays for free! Send them to [e-mail] with the subject line "KZbin Review" for a chance to have your essay analyzed on our channel! If you are comfortable having me workshop your common app essay in a KZbin video, I would be more than happy to do it completely free for you (we will anonymize your names of course!)! 😊😊😊

[@analu2821]

this is amazingggg thanks

[@meeqvin]

where i can send commonapp essay?

[@orissigra]

​@@meeqvin [e-mail] broo, he typed that

[@deborahgodwin990]

Wow. So this offer isn't available again? I wanted to send in my essay for review.

[@arielshih9353]

Love the essays that were highlighted in this video, as well as the care and depth of analysis that went into the editing!

[@LilyRen-y3o]

Really thorough video! I love how specific Kevin is with these edits, and was impressed by the revised conclusion! This is super helpful :)

[@romanoalexa]

Gems of tips here-- probably one of the easiest to implement is eliminating the extra details and redundant words! The accumulation of those freed up words gives space for perhaps a more powerful sentence elsewhere! Each words counts.

[@tanyazilinskas9457]

Amazing what a huge difference removing the cliches and unnecessary words makes!

[@angThiDiemTrinh]

I amm so grateful for your mission, you should be more popular!!! Hope to see more valuable advice from you!!! I really appreciate your dedication and kindness!

[@elevatedschool]

Thank you!!!

[@chirmidetha4939]

You are amazing. This is what we need. I would love to get my essay reviewed by you.

[@KokeAlmaz]

I'm Ethiopian student. I like all the reviews you have made. So helpful🙏

[@lornazhen7228]

Another great video! The detail in the analysis is fantastic!

[@MariaRita-zg9sb]

Hello from Brazil! First, I would like to say thank you SO MUCH for this and all your other videos, I'm definitely taking notes! From this video I learned the how to write continously ( don't want to do "The Eureka Problem") and to worry less, I just need to be myself and share my history, but in a unique way. I would love to get my essay reviewed by you, because here in Brazil we use "reais", not dollars, and '"1 real" its 6 dollars, and unfortunately I can't afford that :/ I hope I have this opportunity, and thank you for giving to me and all the students around the world, It means a lot to us who have a big dream waiting to be fulfilled in our hearts :) Yours sincelery, a girl who dreams a lot and its giving her best (or just Maria)

[@karenlu6762]

This is amazing insights! Thank you Kevin!

[@elizabethdaley4622]

These videos offer fantastic feedback and insight! I am very impressed and learned a lot just watching this one video.

[@elevatedschool]

Great to hear!

[@GabeHoffman-p5m]

Love seeing the live editing play-by-play!

[@fozilmamadaliyev7171]

Thank you, Kevin. We're learning a lot from you. I hope you will do this free editing again soon!

[@Ebdnvioqvnonroiwbniow]

This is a great essay, and I loved seeing your edits :D

[@elevatedschool]

Thank you so much!!

[@HunnidBandJuggs]

I love this concept put into action that you are doing!

[@adedunnipinheiro3344]

You’re so nice! I appreciate your channel! Thank you

[@SammettaWorzie]

This video was soo helpful! Thank soo much!

[@NuryChavez-e3i]

Great insights on how to make conclusions stronger!

[@bsimret]

So helpful to see your editing process! Very helpful as partent to know how to give helpful feedback.

[@yea364]

I’m applying to Northeastern as my ED school. Since they don’t have any supplementals this would help a lot!

[@tobalaseoyewusi6199]

Where have you been all through my college applications? So good.

[@Anindolentzelda]

You’re an amazing editor! So talented

[@elevatedschool]

Oh thank you!

[@sarthak1448]

Let's get bro to the 1M

[@sabeennawaz5830]

Brilliant!! A lot of learning for everyone

[@gobelfury]

Oh my goodness! You're such an amazing editor❤️

[@elevatedschool]

Thank you!!

[@EmmanuelaEjoga-l3h]

a timeless video!!

[@Darskhan-bz4v]

You are amazing. This is what we need.1 would love to get my essay reviewed by you🎉❤

[@elevatedschool]

Keep your eyes peeled for updates in the next 2 weeks where we'll be announcing opportunities for FREE essay reviews!

[@Darskhan-bz4v]

@@elevatedschool I am looking forward to it 😊

[@badralbeity4645]

You are an absolute legend!!

[@AnneFletcher-k9b]

Super helpful, thank you!

[@davidbaker8294]

Thank you very much!! Very helpful and I havent even started my draft yet!

[@elevatedschool]

Glad it was helpful! We'll be doing this series again in the fall!

[@SanjarbekNormamatov-f1k]

Good part of the day sir! could you send the marking criteria/rubric for essays?

[@ray1084]

this is awesome. hope you release more of these next week!

[@elevatedschool]

Hi everyone! It's been 2 years since we started this KZbin channel + launched this agency to help kids get into colleges. So far, we've helped more than 70+ students from all across the world and every background imaginable get into every single Ivy League School, Stanford, MIT and more! If you'd like your essay by us, just visit our website! www.elevated.school/editmyessay

[@arnavmiranda]

Hey Kevin! Love the video! Quick question, after watching pretty much every video on your channel I've noticed how you place heavy emphasis on the P/S ratio. However, the second essay you've displayed here, the one you gave an 8 to, doesn't really display much of either a problem or solution. Does this mean that it is possible to draft good essays that don't need to stick to the double problem solution format? Asking because mine is similar to the essay in question here, and I'm a little anxious 😅😅

[@KumudKhattar]

Yes I would like to know this as well. Thank you!!

[@MatthewIgoe]

Specificity, specificity, specificity...and no unnecessary repetition :p !

[@nabhaf2796]

Thank you so so much for your video ❤✨

[@elevatedschool]

You're so welcome!

[@snake_05]

Couldn’t have come at a better time 😄

[@YilackNovesta]

Wow! Such a beautiful lesson

[@SandViperJ3000]

Great tips thanks

[@Numb3r10ck]

Sweet ❤ reminds me of portal ha…

[@KhanhKrafts]

I love all you guys do! Your videos are great and really helpful. I love writing and watching these videos has helped me a lot :)

[@elevatedschool]

Thank you!!

[@alisonaldrich648]

Great info. Wondering why you didn’t talk about the frequent use of passive voice in this essay.

[@ngwuemeka1838]

Thank you for this . I was able to cut down a few sentences from my essay 😊

[@opensales1499]

Great content. Thank you.

[@elevatedschool]

Glad it was helpful!

[@helendobbyn8739]

Thanks for the great information

[@NahumX-d5k]

Thanks for the video!. It saved my life😆😆😆😆

[@Sara-gm4qz]

How do people write like this? I don’t stand a chance 😭

[@heloooooDiana]

😭😭ikkkkk it's so hard

[@PoodleVR]

funny enough, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer my sophmore year too. All my grades went down that year and i haven't been sure if i should mention that to colleges to give reason to the drop in grades. I'm worried it will make it look like an excuse though.

[@elevatedschool]

You can mention it in the Additional Information section of your application!

[@elevatedschool]

Sorry to hear about your Mom :( is she doing alright?

[@angiejlho]

cant wait!

[@melhemhayek1328]

Thanks for the vid!

[@lukesanborn]

I ❤ common app essays

[@cottencandy8073]

Very helpful!

[@elevatedschool]

Glad you think so!

[@jbabarquez]

WOW. It's a good essay but life doesn't happen in that order, right? That's my struggle now. My life is all over.

[@angeliqueordonez5233]

Great and helpful video

[@elevatedschool]

From now until August 2024, I (Kevin) will offering doing FREE intro calls with students (and parents!) Visit: linktr.ee/elevatedschool Thank you watching our videos! Your support seriously means the world to us!!

[@fozilmamadaliyev7171]

I am wondering if we also can have access to the elevated essay rubric.

[@jennykuo4430]

So helpful!

[@elevatedschool]

Glad you think so!

[@stevenxiang3632]

great video, it was so helpful! Do you think using quotes in the essay is valid?

[@elevatedschool]

I typically don't recommend it... but there's an exception to every rule!

[@elevatedschool]

if you mean quotes from famous people, I'd probably avoid - but if you just mean quotes from characters (like dialogue) that's ok!

[@stevenxiang3632]

@@elevatedschool thank you!

[@joshuabober9171]

Rewriting my essay with only a week left til ED 😅

[@abibibiiiiii]

Thank you ❤

[@elevatedschool]

You're welcome 😊

[@СамираШангареева-и3ю]

Hi I was wondering if you guys review essay for New York university?

[@qurbanalihussaini123]

Thank you so much for all your support! It's my dream to get into a top US college. Could you please let me know what kind of students you are looking to help? Thanks a again ❤

[@elevatedschool]

We help all kinds of students - feel free to apply for a scholarship on our website: www.elevated.school/getstarted

[@qurbanalihussaini123]

@@elevatedschool OK, thanks 😊

[@Teen_vibez]

This video is super amazing😅, but i feel the essays word count would be more than 650 words😢

[@edidiongluke]

Please do you review for graduate applicants too?

[@elevatedschool]

Yes we do!

[@davidmasneri3505]

If I deleted the cliche hook, would I keep my opening two sentences or add more?

[@diegonunez4085]

Ermmm I think one or 2 sentence hooks are good bc they kind of demand the reader to keep looking for answers to your hook yk. Your hook should kind of leave the readers a little bit confused which would result in them lookikg further into your essay to understand the mystery you portrayed in the opening

[@veronicasmemories]

I appreciate the help (:

[@ItungoShunem]

Thanks alot.

[@elevatedschool]

Most welcome!

[@KJ7JHN]

KZbin 5C's for conclusion. Close the loop, Conclude, Clarify, Concerns, Consequences.

[@KJ7JHN]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/hmHLZIdoiZuNaNksi=M9FQXPeTxWKFCC1v

[@rubenbartlett2225]

What question does these 2 essays apply to? Is it just the general/personal essay?

[@KJ7JHN]

Need to add water to your flowers. They almost fell over. 😅

[@kadirimariamdamilola9905]

Please can I submit my essay for review but not have it included in the video

[@carlahau698]

yipeeee manifesting

[@grahamkwaker3584]

Let’s seeeee

[@r22gamer54]

what colleges did they get into?

[@chinar_talks]

Hey, how can I connect you to use your essay checking service?

[@elevatedschool]

visit our website! www.elevated.school/editmyessay

[@samihaislam5070]

Can we send supplemental essays then?

[@greggoreo6738]

Great work. Respectfully Yours Gregg Oreo Long Beach CA États Unis

[@Prometheus--]

good morning y'all

[@kazishahjalal6852]

Anyone can help me please. Can I use rhetoric questions in my common app essay?

[@dide-g7k]

yes!!

[@thatUni-guy]

I also have a family based essay

[@swayampathak4273]

i thought this was kevin leonardo

[@HeavenlySunset24]

Wait… so what was the best essay you’ve read so far?

[@kazishahjalal6852]

Can anyone please tell me whether fictional essay is allowed in common app or not? Different people are saying different things. 😊

[@GabrielleWatry]

🎉

[@orbit5311]

Is it possible to submit my essay for advice but not have it included in a video?

[@jiwoorhee9778]

He says then pay him

[@visionaryscenario]

Do you review common app essay for free?

[@ethelyntaylor6349]

Is this 500 words

[@gobelfury]

Can you edit mine?

[@elevatedschool]

Sure! Keep an eye out for when we start asking for requests!