CANCER VLOG | WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO

[e-mail]
INSTA-EMILYHAYWARD.PT
TWITTER-EMILYHAYWARDPT

[@staceypeterson2565]

I continue to watch one of Emily's videos every day, cause I can't deal with a world with no Emily.

[@aplainjaneproduction8285]

I've been watching these videos in chronological order, feeling so happy for her and Aisha when scans were good, when they were enjoying themselves just the two of them or with friends, when they traveled. She was so hopeful to get her life back, to go to the gym, drive again, get a house with Aisha. All the things we sometimes tend to take for granted (she is inspirational in helping me not do that and be grateful for EVERYTHING. Sometimes the child in me will think, maybe she will get better, maybe they can make her well all the while knowing how this ends. Trying to mindfully change the course of things that have already happened. It's hard not to. It's terrible to think that people who languish in nursing homes for years and are practically praying for death and this young person who had such lust for life gets taken. Makes no sense.

[@moeyruth8056]

I miss, miss, miss you Emily!

[@ellamarson3882]

Loving and missing you Em , even though your gone watching your vlogs still inspire me ...thanks sweet angel 💕

Damn girl , so sad that a Young girl hungry for life, died so soon . You are very missed.

[@suzyq4982]

I watch these videos in tears .. I had to stop for two years as it was too much for me . I know Emily would say ‘stay positive ‘ but this world is a sad place without her beautiful smile . Miss you Emily x

[@jennyo9120]

I discovered Emily’s vlogs a year after she had died. What an incredible young lady.

[@007janerussell]

I miss you Em

[@sabrimouffok8447]

Me too

[@iprefersteve]

I still come here to watch these videos when I’m feeling like giving up. Thank you Emily. I miss you ♥️

[@jeansmith3367]

1st March 2020 - still watching this wonderful girl. Emily what can I say.

[@dinkusmcgee1015]

Now 2024. She was so inspiring.❤ so brave.

[@jeansmith3367]

Was thinking of her today 😢

[@malenahernandez9377]

Can we talk about how Cookie was very close to Emily? Was at home with her most of the times when everyone went to work and she was always following her. I wonder if she noticed she was ill and her absence after she left. They say dogs have that kind of sophisticated sense.

[@peterkozak9212]

RIP Emily! So sorry for your family’s and friends who miss you desperately! You were and always will be an inspiration! 😢♥️🙏🏻😢♥️🙏🏻😢♥️🙏🏻😢♥️🙏🏻😇😇😇😇😇

[@Dolphinsz]

Still watch your vlogs :) even if you are gone darling! We don’t leave much behind in life but at least we stay with the people we touch

[@sharongilley3985]

GIRL YOU WERE AMAZING, HOW YOU HANDLED YOUR CANCER ..YOUR VERY MUCH MISSED..

[@desiderata333]

I miss you so much darling. And I miss you and Aisha together very much. God bless your beautiful spirit and Aisha too. Life without you for her must be absolutely devastating. Please watch over her and all your loved ones from Heaven Em. ❤️❤️❤️

[@joleneplourde9885]

Miss you Em!💔.

[@paiiininthebuttt2477]

I followed Emily right through her journey right through to the end. 2023 I’m back here rewatching her vlogs. They’re just as good the second time around. Rip Emily

[@julespowell4896]

Same as me. I miss her. she was such a little warrior. Absolutely amazing.

[@melanieblake2689]

I'm still missing her it's mad I just love hearing her voice miss you sweet Angel in heaven

[@Toffee146]

Emily wasn't religious, but I believe she made life Heaven for so many people just by being on this Earth. Such a terribly sad loss. I really feel for her immediate family and friends the most.

[@GunsNRoses1123]

Emily was so incredibly kind, I have seen others get offended by the sugar comment and specially if they were already trying to eat healthy and doing everything to keep their cancer away. Miss this wonderful young woman, so full of life.

[@robbogallagher3398]

Just started watching all your vids again. You had such a profound impact on my life and I still think about you. Hope you're still rocking it in heaven ❤

[@hawaydeano1535]

Emily mate having crowns disease isn't in the same league as cancer however I can still put some of your perspectives in life into practice and I really appreciate that! Your a massive inspiration.

[@ilovespock4626]

Aisha is a Queen.

[@ellioshiem7892]

you are an amazing motivator. so talented.

[@paulcockerill4260]

You gave back in these videos and your positivity to us all to live life to the fullest.

[@dinkusmcgee1015]

😢 God. Everyone eat sugar- if they are dying give me a break. . She literally just took oral morphine from a Is giant bottle. That's how much pain she was in and I don't know any other hospital that would do that unless it was really necessary. . It's like when my mom was dying of melanoma and they told her not to have cream in her coffee. I said fuck that. They gave her six months and she died six months later. This was from the dietitian who told her it would give her a bad heart even though she knew she was dying. Let her have her Coffee the way she likes it. . Our Doctor said let her have ice cream for breakfast for all.I care at this point. Emily was going to the gym. You could hear the shortness of breath in her voice. Still living her best life and people are going to comment about sugar😮

[@MsTor87]

My comment was on your blog! Fame! You won't realise but I'm the girl who emailed you. I've also had a double lung transplant, so it's been a lifetime of ill health, and now I'm being treated for stomach cancer. You're right though I need to refocus and find what gets me through. Like you I work for myself but can't right now. Life gets so medically focused sometimes it's hard to step back and see life as a whole. Im definitely going to spend time thinking what helps to cope and feel productive. Also you've really taught me to take the days I can do something and do it, even small things. Thank you and keep going! tor-pastthepointofnoreturn.blogspot.co.uk

[@sm5288]

Its both patronising and rude to give others advice on healthy eating. I too was on the receiving end of this and I urge people to think before doing it. No doubt Emily and Aisha would have had a good laugh about it off camera. Bless her beautiful soul. RIEP

[@margaretleavitt6992]

i will love you and Aisha forever

[@cherylcampbell7495]

Still loving you two..miss you.

[@gwynethgrove772]

What a lovely thing to say... giving back feels good. You touch my heart sweetie. My Dad had oramorf when he was having his cancer treatment and it eased his pain really well. Aisha is so lovely, how lucky are you two to have each other..

[@judyrutherford5721]

Love you both! Please get a P.O. Box so we can send you something and thank you for all you do. You’re a constant inspiration. 😘

[@Narlee2226]

Thankyou Emily for sharing and caring Fly High So Loved So Missed ❤️🦋❤️🦋

[@jeansmith3367]

Heartbroken

[@laurenbell4414]

Hi Emily. Just started following your story after watching the C4 documentary. I work in clinical research and have worked on cancer treatments in the past. It's wonderful to see the other side of my work and how it's helping people like yourself. You're such an inspiration and I'm sure you've helped loads of people in similar situations. Keep on being you and keep smiling! Xxx

[@desiderata333]

Lauren Bell ❤️

[@mscavsfan]

I've said it before, but I love the shots you take of where you go in England. I like to see the everyday side streets, intersections, city streets, shops, etc. Love it !!

[@emilyhayward4726]

ill try and include more for you guys... i try and get a good feel of where i am for you lot so you can get a better sense xx Thanks for watching!!

[@wisewillow5731]

Me too! The mother land for me, now in Australia, use to live in Epsom xx

[@wisewillow5731]

Now you are really rubbing it in for us “dieters” with the knowledge you can have and need fatty foods, but don’t feel like it! 😘😘😘

[@desiderata333]

Missing you Emily. April 26, 2024 XOXOXOXOXO

[@miaombak655]

Love your 'realness' Emily. Such a beautiful and upbeat personality with that awesome cloak of strength wrapped around it. There will be those days and that's ok. I heard you say you feel better just talking it out...keep doing that, knowing your KZbin fam are here sending love and positivity. Amazing girl you are. ♡ xx

[@jennifer007007007]

I got the feeling that you worry a bit tooooo much about the blog not being depressing. I don't think you need to worry about that AT ALL. REAL LIFE:- with or without cancer has good days, bad days, ugly days. so just be yourself. if you are feeling low:- say so . if you feel like crying:- say so . if you feel like screaming:- say so . allow yourself permission to feel all you are feeling. as you are entitled to your feelings.

[@adriennebosse6728]

I took a bike ride the other in day beautiful Germany and said to myself " Emily would love the this!"

[@benedictsloane3504]

Love and support to you, Emily. Your positivity is contagious. Miss you at Kings. Keep Smiling :)

[@melanieblake2689]

I really miss you Emily sweet Angel cancer took you but your still in our hearts and thoughts prayers gorgeous u may not be here but I will still watch your videos god bless you Rip beautiful .

[@AussieGirlForJESUS]

Miss you... 💜

[@judyrutherford5721]

Please don’t worry you give back plenty by being YOU and sharing your journey. Hugs and kisses from Canada 🇨🇦

[@mkhan8155]

I found her two years after she passed :(. She's my inspiration right now,I had a concussion 16 months ago and still am not fully recovered. It's hard to accept my limitations and keep a positive outlook some days. I can't even imagine going through what she went through and having so much life until the end! She's such a beautiful person, I've been binge watching and she inspires me to live life the best I can. Rest in peace Emily, you are missed. Aisha, I'm sorry for your lost and I hope you're well, you're amazing as well ❤

[@ellioshiem7892]

you're going to get better like my son did. he is your age. that's why I adore you. and aisha. xx

[@josephbader1243]

May 2 1 9 still missing you Emily. Still watching your vlogs. Love you. You care so much about your followers. Which keeps me coming back. .xoxo

[@voicije]

what did you say about your superdry hoodie??...shit..i cant understand..you talk to fast!!!!

[@bonniebunting6415]

Still missing you Em.

[@yvonnespearing]

eat what you want cancer doesn't care yes sugar does make you feel not so good.but I eat what I want and still die..

[@alexandrasarno6394]

JAGG KOUT the difference maybe if you eat crap you will die suffering in agony. If you eat healthy you will die peacefully like Emily did..good luck

[@yvonnespearing]

my sister ate really good and died of cancer in pain.eveyone is driffrent.she was awesome young lady

[@alexandrasarno6394]

JAGG KOUT Im sorry about your sister..yes everyone is different ❤

[@debisusan1037]

You are so special and loved!

[@abcd65425]

I Hope you and Dan have met there up above and all the good soals must have subscribed you Guys for your heavenly vlogs 🙏😥

[@catharineburke4494]

love your videos Emily. You're Wicked Funny. RIP.

[@sarahprice5542]

Think of your videos as you giving back to everyone - we all really enjoy watching your videos and appreciate how much hard work you put into them just to keep us all up to date and entertained!!! Never forget how wonderful you are - Sending love to you both, hope you have the best week possible ♥♥ xx

[@hayleybradley5761]

Still watching Emily in 2023 ❤

[@Sub-515]

We'll be still watching in 2030 and beyond. She will never be forgotten.

[@sabrinar.3917]

Thanks for the shutout! ✌I didn't know you didn't like fried food. I can't really eat it much myself. just eat more of the non-healthy things you like to indulge in on what would be your cheat days when you worked out. take the time to enjoy food that you normally wouldn't eat on a strict diet. anyways, I hope your leg feels better and good luck at your checkup on thursday! :)

[@ronanwalsh7024]

Back to see you in March 2022... always remember you and how brave you were sweetie xx.

[@hayleydryden8930]

be good if u do video with Aisha's thoughts and feelings x so look forward to that...😉 I'm here supporting my partner and never tell anyone how it affects me x my partner has opted to go without any medical treatments..so im always in Holland and Barrett also xx really enjoy your vlogs..they somehow keep me positive..god bless you both..😘

[@ElliotHaganOfficial]

So gorgeous Emily😍😍😍😍

[@nicolestephenson4979]

Your positivity towards your fight, is such a credit to your endearing soul xx Sending all my prayers, strength and love to you ❤️

[@lillsjul]

For ideas, I like to see you about town, but also I like to see the house and the different rooms and corners in your house. Very different in England.

[@emmacahill4624]

Love your videos you and your gorgeous girlfriend brighten my day💋🌸😍🇦🇺🌹🌷🌺👀😘

[@ellalily123]

Miss u Emily she was one of a kind ❤Rip beautiful girl you will forever be missed xxx

[@emmajoesbury6649]

Living with epilepsy and having my mom pass and now my dad diagnosed with terminal cancer is scary as f*** but you are right. I’m 22 and only just realised how strong i am and resilient. You have to remain on top. Don’t let life get you down no matter what! Great minds think alike. So happy You have Aisha. My Alisha’s called Alex 😂 and you need that support. Brilliant vlog.❤️👌

[@jessharris3954]

Love that you are just so fucking boss, getting shit done and eating all the chicken ever :')

[@curtgreco4355]

2021 god bless Em

[@molliephillips6715]

You are literally incredible to watch and I really hope you get through this. You are so strong and keep it together amazingly! Also Aisha you seem so supportive and lovely, Emily's so lucky to have you there! I don't really write comments on KZbin 😂 but yeah you are both amazing!

[@dizzydaydream9647]

Hi AwesEM. Just had a thought. You have said about loosing weight gradually despite trying to eat loads. I’m a nurse and we give our patients a high calorie supplement called Calogen. It’s only a very small dose (approx 30mls) but it works wonders. Maybe worth having a word with Peta or your GP. Just a thought. Love Debby xx

[@laurakhurram7899]

Love you em

[@travelingtheworldretired]

Miss ya beautiful lady…

[@jessej.m.e8430]

I think its admitting that we have a 'Fault' or just really,really 'Sick' is the hardest thing tbh! I haven't been able to work for 2 years 😟 If I didn't have my Mum & lil Bro I don't think o would be here now, I've lost soon many friends & even family!! Have you noticed since being sick that people treat you different? Because I get that alot. Love Ya Guys xx xx

[@desiderata333]

Jessie Reid I’m so sorry friend. It’s through the roughest times in life we learn who really loves us. You’re truly blessed to have a loving mom and brother. God bless you and I pray you are well. ❤️❤️❤️🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@jessej.m.e8430]

Cynthia Anelante Awww thank you xx

[@lunis471]

Jessie Reid im so sorry to read youve not been well Im so glad you have your mom and your brother ro watch over you. Its hard when you have Cancer your right about admitting youve got a fault in your body. I feel ive turned a corner and this young Woman was a serious inspiration to me. I miss her vlogs so much. I hope your keeping okay. Xxx

[@nnicollan]

Cant understand how well she handled the pain... xxx

[@Terriersontour]

Bone mets are a bummer, I should know, keep smiling and keep fighting , onwards and upwards xx

[@corinnayorke2422]

PS Love your music, and creative editing too! ❤❤

[@mathematicalmuscleman]

Strong Girl.

[@clairecarey8004]

You are giving so much back already with your vlogs Emily. It's good for you to talk it out, I believe that but you have to stop missing those trains and buses ! Haha... You have a strong mind just keep pushing those positive thoughts to the front and keep doing the vlogs cause they really are great xx

[@007janerussell]

Love to you Em and to you Aisha... All my love to you. Rest to you love... 💔❤️

[@julielynn86]

Bless your heart; I am so sorry Emily! You are SUCH a trooper though. It truly is a wonder to behold. Your positivity and playful, natural personality....just awesome. Love your vlogs. Perfectly paced and just wonderful. Praying for you so hard. Hi to Aisha too! And big hugs!!!

[@sandywhite9796]

I wish these videos had dates on them...I just wondered at what point in the cancer she was when this was made...she was so cute and so upbeat...its hard to think of her as having been sick... I wonder quite often how Aisha is...we all need an "Aisha" in our corner don't we now?

[@bamog4560]

The date is under the title , this video was January 2018, 6 months later she died

[@sandywhite9796]

Thank you...wow..6 months..so sad

[@aplainjaneproduction8285]

Aisha is on IG. She has a baby now.

[@joannegreaves1310]

I've only just found your vlog, Emily via the wonderful PeeWeeToms and I'm watching your videos from the beginning. I only wish I'd had the chance to interact with you. What a lovely soul you are, no wonder you are so loved! RIP x

[@chikabolitaful]

This broad is smarter than smart, what an inspiration

[@christopherhartnell9917]

Bless you Emily

[@bahlee100]

I cant stop watching this brave womAn. I think of all the pieces of shit that remain alive and all she did was help others. Poor Emily. Poor Ayesha. Love will last forever to heaven Jena and back

[@claricejones1766]

Do you watch much TV/netflix and if so, what shows/films do you recommend?

[@victoriaindigo]

You’re not depressing me at all girlfriend😀 I’m curious about Aisha’s makeup brush collection lmao I really hope you and Aisha can make another trip to the U.S. this year!

[@jimmyjohnstone7258]

Take it easy. Eat as much as you can. An idea for a video...some ideas for people to get started on gym work. Use someone else to do the exercises to your instruction. You doing verbal instruction...not lifting or any such thing yourself. For the flabby new comer to gym.

[@ljb9854]

On your good days we will laugh along and cheer you up... on your bad days we will send healing thoughts and gentle hugs... you aren’t alone in this. Half of the battle is to get on top of the pain... rest a bit more lovely, stop pushing yourself so hard! We are all standing beside you xxxxx

[@corinnayorke2422]

Hi Emily Was happy to wake up in British Columbia Canada on a cold snowy morning to see a video waiting from you. I love the sunny day you were having! Nice break from the grey! Thank you again for your honesty, and positive outlook in spite of your Cancer. Never feel badly for being real, you are still incredibly strong and couragous! Tomorrow my husband Paul has his 4th Immune therapy treatment for Melanoma. Thankfully he is doing well. I was just diagnosed with Lupus this week after several years of pain and doctors thinking it was just Fibromyalgia. Another challenge, but that is life and still counting our blessings. So now we are supporting one another. We wake up each day thankful. We share our feelings, our truth, then we lay it all down for the day to experience joy, love and laughter doing our best. Our family and friends are also so supportive. We understand the importance of love and support. Your Vlog has helped me personally with informative details, education on this disease, and you give hope. Aisha is so generous and supportive as well. What loving people you are. Keep the good fight, you have prayers and good thoughts coming from around the world. You deserve to be spoiled and yet you both still have hearts to give. That is what life is truly about, loving and lifting one another up. It's a gift we can all have and share. I would love to see more videos of where you live. I love the Double Decker buses, and historic buildings. Restaurants, food dishes from your favorite restaurant visits, shops, of course fun time with you and Aisha and even the hard days. You both have incredible smiles, and positive attitudes in the face of Cancer. This new medication is working for you! You look better each video. I feel stronger to walk with my husband just from watching your Vlogs. I am no longer gripped with fear. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! 💟💟💟 See you in your next Vlog. Remember to REST!

[@Visionary99]

Did you give Aisha a big hug & kiss for the meal? She loves you so much.

[@lisaanne1012]

I am so surprised that you have a thousand subscribers. You are a superstar to me. Much love from Canada, Lisa xx

[@robynholliday4794]

Nice to hear your voice again

[@sueoliver9712]

Your positivity is wonderful. How is your mum and family coping with your diagnosis? It must be awful for them seeing you in pain but I suppose your positive attitude actually helps them too!! Well in Emily xxx

[@sarahdore7884]

Have you been back to the Vagina Cafe? Oh I got such a laugh from that. When will you have your next scan on your hip? I’m so hoping your decreased pain means the drugs are working like you said. I would love to see a video about how you both came out to your families and how they handled it, if that’s not too personal.

[@geraldinemaigne8463]

You deserve to be spoiled, sweetie. Take good care of yourself and let your loved ones help you out too as I'm sure this makes them happy. Aisha's beautiful smile when she thinks of something to give you as a present is a perfect example. xoxo

[@jimmyjohnstone7258]

Keep eating as much as you can and rest when you need to. You need fatty / high carb foods. Lean chicken and salad is fine for one meal but eat the fat and carbs in your second meal. Does your doctor have any suggested calorie intake recommendation?

[@paulamarieart]

You are amazing Emily x

[@julieann5381]

❤

[@johelsdon9417]

Lovin the vlogs and your determination to focus on doing positive things even though you’re unable to work at the moment. Also gotta say I’m really enjoying the music on the last couple of vlogs. Keep on keeping on. We’re all rooting for you! xx

[@rochellenicoletta7353]

she became emotional at the end 😓

[@eleshaburgess8567]

Agree no sugar but load up on good fats. Avos, nuts, eggs, full cream whipped with strawberry’s as a treat. You’re awesome!

[@cottagegardener3725]

Did Emily and Aisha live with Alisha’s family home with her family?